Bottled Lies
by KarinaCullen
Summary: Labeled as the freak at Forks High, Bella keeps her distance from her peers. Especially Edward, a boy who hates her for no reason. The moment Edward walks into Bella committing suicide, everything is tested. Hatred. Love. Truth ... and Bottled Lies. BxE
1. Chapter One: Scorned

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight

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Chapter One: Scorned

"Bella," Renee said to her as she began to stir, "It's time to wake up, sweetie."

Bella groaned. "No."

"Come on, sweetheart. You wouldn't want to be late for your junior year."

_Yes, I would. Actually, I would prefer it if I didn't go at all._

"I think I'll just stay in bed for the next ten months, Mom," She muttered into her pillow.

The sheets of her bed were abruptly ripped off her body, letting the cool air stick to her skin. "Get up, Bella. This year is going to be great!"

When Bella heard Renee close the door, she opened her eyes. Sunlight began to spill from her window, allowing a luminous glow to brighten the room. She could smell the makings of pancakes coming from downstairs, and rolled her eyes. Renee always made pancakes on the first day of school, saying that everyone needed something sweet to start the school year. However, Bella had learned that no matter how wonderful the breakfast was, her life at Fork's High School would be forever miserable.

She pushed herself out of bed and scratched the back of her head as she made her way to the bathroom. Bella avoided the full-length mirror her mother had put in. She hated looking in the mirror, mainly because she would always meet with the same reflection – pale skin, big brown eyes, and dark brown-almost-black hair that came to her waist. Before, it was like any other mirror, only showing her face and the top of her build. But ever since her mom had replaced it, Bella could not only see her face and the top of her build, but the rest of her body as well.

It wasn't like Bella had a bad body, she just wasn't as confident as those other girls at her school. If anything, the only thing Bella liked about her appearance was truly her hair. For most of her life, her mother always had it cut to her shoulders, making her look like she was twelve. The fact that her hair made unruly twists, only made her look younger. But over the course of a year, she was able to grow her hair out. Now it was long and made loose waves.

However, Bella still didn't feel that confident about herself. It wasn't like her classmates made an effort to think otherwise. If anything, they only made her self-esteem shrink to the size of an ant.

"Bella!" She heard Renee yell, "Take a shower already! You're breakfast is ready."

She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, "Okay, Mom." She turned on the hot water and stripped of her pajamas.

Bella always took long showers, relishing the moment of actually being alone without her classmates' taunts and her parent's lectures. This was the only time where she and her thoughts couldn't be bothered. However, her father, Phil, always hounded her for raising the water bill. Well, Phil hounded her no matter what, and it wasn't like Renee did anything to stop it.

Renee always complained about her husband, usually starting with the words: "Phil isn't the smartest man . . ." and ending with the words, "But he's a good man, Bella." Bella thought that that was complete and utter shit, because otherwise there wouldn't be bruises and scratches on her body. And still, Renee did nothing to stop it. Maybe that was why she made pancakes on special days, a way to say that she was sorry for being a bystander.

Well, it was the thought that counted, right?

Bella didn't need to look out the window or check the weather channel in order to plan what to wear – it was Forks, meaning that it would be another day of overcast skies and never ending rain. She sighed and slipped on a pair of jeans and the grey sweater top Renee had bought for her. Before running out of her room, Bella looked in the mirror and bit her lip. She looked ready, her hair soft and her skin clear, but still average. Without blinking once more in the mirror, Bella grabbed her backpack and shut her bedroom door behind her. She nearly fell when she ran down the stairs, but the banister saved her from another injury.

"It's about time you got here," Renee said. Bella looked like her, but instead of the long locks she had, Renee had short hair falling just above her shoulders. Another thing was that instead of brown eyes; she had striking blue ones. For that, Bella envied her.

"I'm still in summer mode," She said, grabbing a plate and placing a pancake on it, "Where's dad?"

Renee sighed. "He had to go to work early."

"But of course," Bella mumbled.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Bella looked at her, raising an eyebrow. "He's _always_ at work."

"Yes, because he's a busy man," Renee replied nonchalantly, cleaning the dishes. "Work is time consuming, Bella."

"Not time consuming enough, because he still has time to take his stress out on me. If he's such a busy man, how can he fit abuse into his sched – "

She dropped the pan and whipped around. "That's enough!" Bella watched as Renee took deep breaths before taking the pan out of the sink. "Eat your breakfast."

Bella shook her head and pushed the plate away from her, "No, thanks. I'd rather not have a serving of bullshit this morning." She could hear Renee calling for her, spilling apologies and offers, but she ignored it. It made Bella sick to hear what Renee said about Phil, only to defend him when Bella had something to say.

Hypocrisy . . . what a fucked up world that word brought along.

After fishing for her cell phone, Bella noted that it was fifteen to nine – meaning that she was going to get to school much earlier than she had wanted to. But then again, it wasn't like she really wanted to be at home either. She groaned and leaned her head back. She wanted to go somewhere warm – a place where it never rained and the sun always shining. But to be perfectly honest, any place was better than the hellhole that was Forks.

_Speak of the devil . . . _Bella thought.

Coming around the corner of her neighbor's house was none other than Edward Cullen. He was clad in dark jeans and a black v-neck t-shirt under his unbuttoned pea coat. His hair was the usual copper colored dump and his green eyes glowed like a mutant. In other words, he totally defined the term: douche. Which was basically why Bella called him General Douche Master – Douche Master for short – behind his back. That, and the unknown hatred he had towards her.

At one moment, Douche Master looked at her, and their eyes locked. It was only one second of innocence . . . before he scowled. Bella scoffed and rolled her eyes. As much as she wanted to wound his ego this morning, Bella knew he wasn't worth it. The two got into their individual cars, and turned on the ignition. Bella let him back out first and head off, since she knew how much of a crazy driver he was. And as Bella followed the trail, all she could think was: _Ha! My car is better than yours, asshole._

Which was true, her car _was _much better than Douche Master's. She knew that his parents got him a BMW for his seventeenth birthday – because for some reason his mother, Esme, took a liking to Bella and told her a lot of useless information – and knew he had wanted that vehicle for quite some time. Douche Master knew Bella was jealous, because her car was beat up and on the verge of going to the dump. That was, until a month ago, Bella had received an Audi convertible as a _very _belated birthday present from Renee. She remembered saying that having a convertible in a town that rained as much as Forks was unreasonable, but Renee shrugged and said, "You're sixteen, and this is your sweet present from your amazing mom."

And the minute he saw her car, Bella wanted to take a picture. His expression was flawless, and after all these years of being neighbors, Bella finally had the winning hand. However, that was the only winning hand she received, since Douche Master still had the whole school calling her the Duck. She sighed . . . only two more years, and she was out of Forks for good.

Bella arrived at Forks High School with five minutes to spare. She pulled out the bright yellow paper that had her schedule printed in black and got out of her car. With her bag slung over her shoulder, she pressed the button on her key that locked her doors. Bella noticed the amount of stares she had gotten, and the whispers about the car. Bella could have only guessed that they were discussing how the Duck could have a car like that. To be honest, she didn't really know either. In fact, she still wasn't sure how Renee convinced Phil to get her the car in the first place, since he made it blatantly clear that he would only ever pay for the old beat up truck.

It was the first day of school and Bella was already stressing over everything. She inwardly laughed at herself, because stressing was something she always did.

The stares were gone, and everyone ignored her. Just the way Bella liked it – just the way she had lived it. As she walked through the hallway, students had already gotten their lockers and were filling it with their textbooks. Which reminded Bella that she still needed to get her books. She took a right and pushed through the wooden doors of the library. Many kids her age were lining up for their individual books. Bella looked at her schedule and then back to the tables, deciding to line up in the shortest line first and then work her way up.

So that meant she got her French book first, and then her Biology text. When she lined up for her English Literary class, a couple of girls had budged in front of her. As much as Bella wanted to tell them to go to the back of the line, she knew they wouldn't move. Everyone at Fork's High seemed to have some sort of power, and they all owned it and rubbed it in Bella's face.

"Here's your locker number and lock," One of the teachers said before yelling, "Next!"

Bella squeezed her way through all of the students in the hallway. She hated the new location of her locker. It was on the left wing of the school when her homeroom was in the right wing, and to add to the list, it wasn't too far from the gym. Just fucking _fantastic._

Being the klutz she was, she almost ran into one of the guys on the football team. Luckily she dodged him before she caused a major accident, but it didn't stop him from saying, "Watch where you're going, Freak."

Snickers from his group of friends made the tops of her ears grow hot, and she walked away without replying. What was even worse was that Douche Master saw the scene. He walked up to Bella, a corner of his mouth tugging into that crooked smile she hated. She ignored him when she found her locker. Douche Master was still there just watching her.

_What the hell was his problem?_

"Can I help you?" She asked without turning around.

"Like _you _could do anything for _me,_" He chuckled, "I just want to let you know that the next time you want to stare at me, try to make it more subtle."

Bella locked her locker door and turned around, narrowing her eyes. "Excuse me?"

Douche Master rolled his eyes. "Oh, _come on. _I caught you ogle me this morning. It was fucking freaky."

If it were possible, Bella narrowed her eyes even more. "I was _not _staring. Is it a crime to look around when you leave the house? And if I'm not mistaken, you were staring at me, too."

"So you admit you were staring."

"What? No . . . I . . . Fuck, can't you just leave me alone? I don't need to be bothered by anyone. Especially not _you_," Bella spat. She didn't understand why Douche Master was even talking to her, and she preferred it if he kept his distance.

He bit the inside of his cheek. "Whatever, Duck."

Bella watched as he turned around and blended into the crowded hallway. And when she was sure that he wouldn't hear her, she muttered, "Go fuck yourself, Douche."

**x x x x x x**

The rest of the day was just as monotonous as Bella had expected. Aside from the unwanted glares and rude whispers that surrounded her, her morning classes had gone by smoothly. After two years, and going on third, she had gotten quite used to the gossip about the Duck. At first it was painful – seriously, freshman year had been hell – but now it was merely a kink in her day, nothing she couldn't handle. It was a lot better than what she had to face at home. But hey, no one said that life was fair.

So fucking true.

Instead of listening to her teachers ramble about the curriculum, Bella thought about what Phil had said, more like screamed, to her the previous night. She wasn't feeling well – nausea, such a pain in the ass. Renee understood why she didn't want to eat and let her rest. Saying something about how Bella needed to be at her best health for the first day of school. If Bella didn't feel like throwing up, she would have scoffed at that remark. So, like any nauseas human being, Bella went to sleep. She didn't even get fifteen minutes worth of rest before Phil came storming into her bedroom.

"You worthless piece of shit!" He yelled. Bella had jumped back, suddenly regretting that when her stomach did flops. "Your mother made us dinner and here you are, sleeping."

"B-but, I'm not feeling well, Dad," She stuttered.

Phil rolled his eyes and grabbed her wrist aggressively. He pulled her out of bed and dragged her downstairs to the dinner table. And when Renee said that Bella should be resting for school, he replied, "No, she should learn to respect us."

Renee did nothing to stop him and began to fill Bella's plate. Bella watched as Renee gave her a sympathetic expression. She looked away and slowly ate the mashed potatoes and steak, clutching onto her stomach all the while.

"Ms. Swan," Mr. Cormier said, bringing Bella out of her reverie. "Am I boring you, or are you still in the summer slump."

Bella shook her head. "Sorry, sir. I was just daydreaming, it won't happen again."

Mr. Cormier tapped his fingers along his desk, giving Bella a long hard look before returning his gaze to the class. "This year in French, we're going to expand our conversational skills. Now, I know your French is a bit rusty after two months, but qui est assez brave pour commencer une conversation dans le français depuis cinq minutes?"

Bella looked down at her left forearm and raised the sleeve a sliver, only to reveal her bruising wrist. She shuddered that her bruise was in the shape of five fingertips. She could feel someone's stare and she looked to her right. A girl that she had never seen before was staring at Bella's wrist with wide eyes, and when she noticed that Bella was looking back at her, she turned her gaze.

When the bell rang, Bella gathered her books quickly so that she could eat her lunch and satiate her growling stomach. Maybe she should have taken the pancakes to go . . .

"Excuse me," A small voice said. Bella didn't think it was towards her, so she completely ignored it. The voice cleared their throat. "Um, hello?"

Bella looked up tentatively. It was the new girl. "Yes?"

"I didn't mean to stare at your wrist, and I apologize." She was small, probably no taller than five feet, and her blue-black hair was cut into a reverse bob. She had lightly tanned skin and gray eyes. A very pretty girl, that was for sure. Another thing that was for sure was that after this, she would hear that talking to the Duck was not permitted unless she wanted to be damned.

"That's okay," Bella replied softly before getting out of her desk, trying to save the girl from damnation.

"I'm Alice by the way, my mom, brother and I just moved here from California. What's your name?"

This girl actually wanted to know her name? She obviously hadn't been given 'the talk' yet. "Um, I'm Be – "

"New Girl!" Angela Webber hissed to Alice. Angela was the skank of Forks High, and her wardrobe definitely screamed _whore. _Jesus, it was raining and the chick was wearing a denim mini skirt and tank top. Angela wrapped her arm around Alice's small shoulders and looked down at her. "Look, I know you're new here, so I'm going to give you just a little bit of advice. Don't talk to the Duck," She nodded towards Bella as she looked down at her feet. "Not unless you want to be socially shut down like _her_."

When they began to leave, Bella looked back up. Alice turned her head to look at Bella, but was forced to gaze back at Angela when the fingers of the whore pulled her chin. Bella flinched at the gesture – it reminded her of Phil.

"You're lucky I got to you before you caught the bird flu," She heard Angela say.

_Geez, _Bella thought. _I should be a fucking psychic._

There it was, Angela was giving Alice the rundown of how things went around here. Bella didn't even get the chance to give Alice her name, so that at least someone would know she actually had one besides Duck or Freak. She sighed. Oh well, it was just another day at Forks High for her.

Bella entered the cafeteria. No one acknowledged her, and she liked it like that. At least, she told herself that she liked not being bothered. She waited in line to grab a sandwich and a juice box, crossing her arms over her chest. When she had retrieved her lunch, Bella walked to the corner of the room. It was where she always sat, ever since the first day of freshman year. She set down her tray and pulled out her tattered copy of _Sense and Sensibility. _She ate and read, drowning out the sounds of her classmates as they conversed with each other. Bella was completely lost in words when the bell rang, signaling that lunch hour was over. She bit her lip and gathered her things.

Bella had forgotten that she had to get her notebook for her creative writing class. The cafeteria was close to the classroom, however, _not_ close to her locker. She grumbled expletives all the way to her locker, she seriously wanted to go back to the office and switch because it was just ridiculous. It wasn't the thought of being late bothered Bella, but the mere fact that all eyes would be on her. When she got her things from her damned locker, she booked it to the other side of school. She made it just in time for the warning bell and was glad that not everyone had filed in yet.

Bella had no aspiration to become a writer, but she enjoyed creative writing class. It was a chance to just escape and flee to her world for forty-five minutes. And as she glanced around the room, it seemed that not a lot of people had taken the elective – probably only fifteen students.

Mrs. Anderson came in with a smile on her face. She leaned back on her desk and gave a contemplative sigh. "Welcome back. I'm glad that this is a small class, that means we have a better chance of actually gaining something this year."

The tall woman brushed her blonde hair over shoulder and walked around the desk, approaching the chalkboard. In bright pink chalk, she had written: _Collaboration. _

"Collaboration doesn't necessarily mean writing alongside someone," Mrs. Anderson stated, clapping her hands of the chalk, "By simply peer editing or sharing ideas, you are collaborating. Ah, Mr. Cullen, I'm glad you could join us."

Everyone, but Bella, turned his or her heads to the door. She could hear a lot of the girls gasp. It still boggled her mind as to why they thought he was so good looking. If anything, he looked like preppy garbage. At least, he looked like preppy garbage to _her_. And when Bella saw him sit in the seat next to her through her peripheral, she rolled her eyes. And there was absolutely no doubt there was a glower on his face.

Mrs. Anderson continued her ramble about collaboration, and how she thought it would be a good idea to use it throughout the course of the year. She also added how it would benefit them, 'since we were all a little groggy from the vacation.' Bella was pretty sure every teacher had to have a warm up and then say something about mushy summer brains in order to start the year.

Bella wasn't really paying attention after that, and she decided that the drawings on her desk were much more amusing. Seriously, did people not have anything better to do than draw a penis on the wooden surface? And since she wasn't listening, Mrs. Anderson's hand on her head shocked her. The teacher turned Bella's head towards Douche Master's and his towards her.

"You are now looking at your collaboration partner for the year."

_Oh for the love of God!_

"Um, Mrs. Anderson?" Douche Master murmured, "I don't think that we should be partners."

"I completely agree," Bella said. That was probably the only time Bella would ever agree with him.

Mrs. Anderson looked taken back. "Why not?"

Douche Master started, "Well, first off, she's a freak whose only friend are classic novels . . ."

Bella pointed towards him. "And he's an egotistical jerk who probably spends more time looking in the mirror than doing the work in this class . . ."

Their rambling was interrupted by Mrs. Anderson's chuckling. "Oh, you two will make _fantastic _collaborators." With that final word, she moved onto partnering the rest of the class.

"I'm going to make your life a living hell," Edward said to Bella in the utmost seriousness.

She scoffed. "I'm already in hell, thank you very much. You were a great contributor to that."

Not in the mood to say anything else, she opened her blank notebook and began doodling. It seemed that Douche Master didn't have anything else to say either since he slowly turned in his desk so that he was facing the front. It wasn't until five minutes after she had said those words did she realize their truth.

She _was _living in hell, and Douche Master _did _help with that. For no reason, he disliked her the minute they met. It was never a problem, since they never really talked through elementary or middle school. It wasn't until the first day of high school did he make his hate for her that much more apparent. With his social high, he was able to get the nickname Duck to spread around, and the fact that she didn't have any friends, the name Freak was also included. Bella didn't know what made him hate her so much; it was ludicrous.

Mrs. Anderson used the remainder of the class to go over the different types of assignments they would be doing. She also stated that they would begin collaborating the next day, which made Bella inwardly groan. They would be brainstorming tomorrow, which meant they actually had to _talk _for the duration of the period. Bella could predict what was going to happen the next day, and she was _not _excited.

Bella couldn't be any more relieved when class ended; only one more to go and the day would be over. Douche Master glared at her before he got out of his desk and stalked outside of the classroom.

"Ass," She muttered under her breath.

Having gym at the end of the day was both good and bad. Good, because that meant she wouldn't have to be sweaty all day, and her locker was also very near the doors. It was bad because she was athletically inept. She grabbed her gym clothes from her locker and pushed through the gymnasium doors, the stench of sweat filling her nose. Ugh, she hated physical education. Bella made her way to the girl's change room and found the locker she was assigned. She changed quickly and groaned when she saw Angela Webber and her new slave Alice Whateverherlastnamewas.

Just as Bella had expected, gym was hell. They had to play volleyball. Her teammates knew that Bella couldn't do shit, so they covered for her. However, since Angela was on her team and was flirting with Tyler, she didn't cover her. Bella had to bump the ball, only to have it land on Angela's head.

"You bitch!" She shrieked, touching the top of her head. "You ruined my hair! You're such a _freak!_"

Everyone in the gymnasium laughed and pointed at Bella, and all she did was look away. Their taunts and teasing seemed to have prolonged for hours, each one of them making their way to her head. And just when she was about to book it out of the gymnasium, someone touched her arm, and she surprised her to see it was Alice. "Come on, let's get out of here early," She whispered.

Bella nodded warily as Alice led her back to the change rooms. They changed into their regular clothes in silence, and she was happy that she could cover the bruise once again. Bella slung her backpack over her shoulder and pulled her hair over to one side. Alice took Bella's hand as they snuck out the gym. The halls were quiet, the only sound were their shoes squeaking along the floors.

Once they were outside and Bella was standing next to her car she said, "Thanks, Alice. I don't know why you did it, but I'm glad you did."

Alice shrugged. "Don't worry about it. I know what it's like to be ridiculed, so I think they're all jerks."

"What about Angela?"

"Like I said, I think they're jerks," Alice looked side to side and whispered to Bella, "You wouldn't know where I could get some weed, would you?"

Bella shook her head. "No, I'm sorry."

Alice smiled. "Good. I just want to make sure my new friend isn't into stuff like that. See you around, Bella." Alice turned on her heel and ran back to the school, slipping inside.

Bella shook her head incredulously. She wondered why Alice did something nice for her, since it never really happened that often. And why she called Bella her friend. Except neither of those two truly _bothered_ her, it was the fact that Alice hadn't called her by any of the nicknames she was unwillingly given. She actually called her by her _name, _and she had no idea how she got it.

**x x x x x x**

"How was your first day?" Renee called from the kitchen as soon as Bella stepped through the front door.

Bella grimaced. "Just peachy."

Just as she was about to climb the stairs, she heard the man on the TV talking about the football game. She could only guess that Phil was home early, which was very rare. But then again, the whole entire day had just been full of rarities.

"Bella," He said monotonously, "Are you feeling better?"

She nodded, biting the inside of her cheek. "Um, yeah."

"Good. So I'll be expecting your ass on the chair for dinner this time without my help." He said nonchalantly, not really saying it _to _her, since his eyes were glued to the flat screen TV. But she knew that it was directed towards her. "Go do your homework so that you can leave for college."

"Yes, Dad."

When Bella got to her room, she chucked her backpack to the corner and collapsed on her bed. Tears spilled from her eyes and she let them fall. She looked out her window as she lay on the bed, only to gasp when she saw Douche Master watching her from his bedroom. She got out of the bed and walked over to the window furiously. Bella closed the blinds and huffed. She didn't need Douche Master to know that she was crying, since he probably thought that the tears were from gym class. There was no doubt that that had been spread throughout the school.

But school was the least of Bella's worries, since she now had to face dinner, which was much scarier than Angela's outburst.

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**Twitter: ****kaarinaaxo**

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Translation for that sentence in Bella's French Class:

_**Qui est assez brave pour commencer une conversation dans le français depuis cinq minutes: **_which is rather brave to begin a dialogue in French for five minutes?

**Here is the first chapter of my new story! I really hope you like it and decide to go on this journey with me. I can tell you right now that this story will be intense (in a good way). I'm so excited :)**

**I'm hoping to get the second chapter out next week. It's already written, I just need to edit it.**

**From those of you who read Believe Me, and have ventured here .. WELCOME BACK MY LOVELIES. For the newbies .. WASSUP ;) **

**Um, my French is very minimal. I used to know French, but it's been like five years since my last French class. It's been awhile. So if my French in that one sentence wasn't correct, I apologize. In no way was I meaning to offend anyone.**

**Tell me your thoughts, please. REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW :)**

**Karina**


	2. Chapter Two: Repentance

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

But I do own posters of Edward and Justin Bieber - my two loves :)

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Chapter Two: Repentance

"Can I ask you something?" Alice asked, her mouth semi-filled with her ham and cheese sandwich.

Bella glanced away from her copy of _Gone With The Wind, _looking at Alice through her lashes. "Um, yeah. Go for it."

It had been two days since that unfaithful day in the gym, and Alice _still _insisted on hanging around with Bella. It was kind of weird, having someone meet her at her locker before and after school, and not being the only one sitting at her table in the corner of the cafeteria. However, Bella had to admit – the girl had balls. She warned Alice, saying that if she was seen with Bella that she would be cast almost as low as her. Her response? A simple shrug and a loud pop of her gum. Bella had no clue why Alice was sticking around with the Duck.

So as Bella sat there with the thick classic novel in her hands, she waited for Alice's question. She always asked Bella questions. It felt like an interview.

_Hmm, an interview with a pixie … that was new._

"I just want to know why you always fight back with Edward Cullen, and not anyone else," She finally let out.

"What are you talking about?" By this time, Bella had marked her page and closed the book.

Alice swallowed her last piece of the sandwich, now wiping her mouth with a napkin. "I've noticed that you let everyone talk shit to you. But when Edward does it, you don't take it. What's up with that?"

Bella sighed. "It's because all this shit started with Douche Master. He's hated me for no reason, and has used his popularity to make everyone hate me as well. For example – the reason why people call me the Duck is because of him. You know the story about the ugly duckling? Well, apparently, I don't live up to my last name," Just as she said that, a roar of laughter exploded throughout the cafeteria. Both Alice and Bella turned their heads toward the center of the room, and the minute Bella saw what the commotion was, she rolled her eyes and looked away. Douche Master and his friends were all chuckling and giggling, having a good time. They laughed as though they were in a movie – a homemade movie that was so horribly made it caused people to want to vomit. "Plus, he's an ass."

"I agree," Wow, that was a first. Every girl in this school (except Bella, of course) _loved _his ass. "I saw this freshman chick give him a cupcake yesterday. It was really cute – you know; it had pink icing and a huge heart on it. Well, when she walked away, he threw it in the trash."

"And …"

"_And, _he should have at least had the decency to look at her when she gave it to him. And then to throw it in the garbage, after she made it _especially _for him? My conclusion is that Edward is an ungrateful bastard."

"Or just a bastard – as in, the general term," Bella mumbled.

Alice snorted and continued with her lunch. "I don't know why my brother hangs out with him."

"Your brother?"

She nodded. "The ripped one, over there, standing by the blonde chick." Bella looked over her shoulder and saw the boy that Alice was talking about – the _massive _boy that just so happened to be _tiny _Alice's brother. And then she saw Rosalie, all tall and beautiful, with perfect curves and long blonde hair to match.

"He's probably hanging out with Douche Master just to get with Rosalie – they're best friends," Bella responded. If there was one thing Bella knew about Douche Master's personal life, it was that he and Rosalie were very close. It made sense – the two of them were both inexplicably horrible. Bella began packing her things just as she told Alice, "I didn't know you had a brother. What, are you ashamed of him?"

"It's not that I'm ashamed of Emmett – I just don't agree with some of the things he does, that's all."

Bella stared at her. "Well, that was vague."

Alice shrugged and smiled lightly. "Sometimes mystery is good for the soul. Especially when you're the new kid."

Bella nodded her head just as the bell rang. The two of them got up and said their goodbyes, Bella felt awkward with greetings and farewells; she didn't know what to do. So when Alice hugged her just before she ran off for class, Bella didn't know if she was supposed to wave at her as she looked back. And as she walked towards her Creative Writing class, she wondered what Alice was hiding. There was definitely something, because what family in their right minds move from California to Forks? Maybe something happened in Cali, or maybe it was something completely different. All Bella knew was that her and Alice's friendship – it was so weird saying that word – was hazy. Alice didn't want to tell Bella her story, and Bella most definitely did not want to tell hers. But she liked it like that – in fact, she _wanted _it like that. If she was going to have a friend, something that she would still want is her privacy. And if Alice preferred that as well, then so be it. It was only fair.

As she was nearing the door to her next class, Bella caught something under her foot, causing her to fall forward. She landed on her knees, her hands on the floor, and her books and notes scattered everywhere. Then there was a snicker. Bella looked up and saw Angela, pulling her foot back from the outstretched position. She immediately looked away, back at the ground.

"Oops," Angela said sarcastically. "Sorry, Duck, I didn't see you there." She laughed once more before she strutted down the hall in her four-inch heels, posse following suit.

As Bella gathered her things, she swore she heard Angela say, "What a dumb bitch," followed with a fit of laughter. Bella bit the inside of her cheek, trying not to scream. Instead, she composed herself with a deep sigh and rose from the ground. The warning bell set off, and she scurried to the room, just before Mrs. Anderson closed the door. Bella blushed scarlet when she realized everyone was staring at her, and she quickly looked down at her feet and went to her seat.

Mrs. Anderson hadn't actually proceeded with the collaboration assignment, and for that, Bella thanked the school board for adding something into the course. She didn't have to work with Douche Master for two days, and wouldn't have to today either, since there was a test on poetic analysis. So as Bella handed in her analysis of _Mezzo Cammin _by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, she never expected the words that came out of Mrs. Anderson's mouth.

"Five minutes left to finish your analysis. And then we can finally put that useless unit aside and get with your collaboration partners."

The fact that she said it so excitedly made Bella's skin crawl. She went back to her desk, and as the five minutes passed, the only words that were running through her mind were: fuck, damn, shit, and holy hell. As in _fuck, _she couldn't believe they had to start collaborating. As in _shit, _collaborating was going to be monstrous. And, of course, _holy hell, _she had to work with Douche Master because he was her _damn _collaboration partner.

"Okay, I'll need the rest of the papers in," Mrs. Anderson announced, and about five people handed in their analysis. When everyone was seated, she stood up, walked around her desk and clasped her hands together. "For your first assignment, I'll be handing out a sheet of paper with _awful _grammar and _horrible _writing. Remember when I said by merely editing with someone else, you'd be collaborating? Well, it is you and your partner's job to edit it." She took the pile of paper off her desk and began handing it out, and as soon as she planted the paper on Bella's desk, she continued, "You have until the rest of the class to finish. Good luck."

Everyone began working with their partners, reading the excerpt out loud and marking the errors. Neither Douche Master nor Bella had moved from their position. Bella certainly did not want to work with him, and there was no doubt that it was vice versa. About fifteen minutes into the assignment, and a half drawn elephant on a notebook, Mrs. Anderson told them to start working. Every group had a different script, and that it _must _be completed for marks.

Once the teacher was gone, Douche Master sighed and turned in his seat so that he was facing Bella. "I guess we better get started," He said, his lips tightened into a straight line.

"Look," Bella countered. "I don't really want to work with you either. But let's try to get this finished quickly, okay?"

"Whatever, Freak," He replied, his eyes glaring. She felt her eyes narrow as well. The guy looked down, and his eyebrows furrowed. He nodded towards her hand in acknowledgement. "What happened?"

"Huh?"

He rolled his eyes. "Your hand, it's bleeding. Why?"

Bella looked down, and sure enough, the bottom of her left palm was scathed, or at least, the blood was dry. She crossed her arms over her chest so that Douche Master couldn't see it. He didn't need to know what happened with Angela twenty minutes ago – she didn't need to be more ashamed and embarrassed than she already was. "Nothing."

"It's obviously not 'nothing' …"

"Why do you care?" Bella snapped

Douche Master blinked. "I don't."

"Good. So can we get started already?"

Douche Master watched her, and it made her feel uncomfortable. Finally, he nodded his head and dragged his chair to her desk, pulling the paper so that it was between them. They read it once over quietly before they discussed, and when they started discussing, well, they didn't really agree on many things. Where Bella thought that a sentence was awkward, Douche Master thought it was fine. And when he thought the wording needed work, she didn't see the problem. They eventually were able to finish the assignment with minutes to spare, and all Bella could think was that the work they just handed in went to shit.

The rest of the afternoon was incredibly boring, and as Bella walked towards her locker at the end of the day, she wasn't surprised to see Alice waiting for her. Her short hair so sleek and shiny while she dressed in brown leather boots over distressed jeans, and a loose knit sweater. Her stylish attire made Bella feel a little insecure, since she was only clad in straight leg jeans and an oxford shirt.

"Hey, Bella?" Alice said, though it sounded like a question.

Bella stuffed her backpack with her books. "Mhmm?"

"I was just wondering if you could give me a ride home? My brother usually drives me, but we got into this huge fight between fifth and sixth period and he left."

"Um, sure. What happened that got your brother upset enough to abandon you?"

"Nothing to worry about," Alice replied nonchalantly. Bella let it go, and locked her locker door. "Thanks, Bella."

Bella looked at her, and though it may not have been awkward for Alice, it was definitelyawkward for _her_. "It's no problem. You'll just have to give me directions."

"No, I was going to make you _guess _my address while I painted my nails," She replied, heavily sarcastic. Bella chuckled. "Let's go."

"I'm right behind you," She said. And just as Bella slung her backpack over her shoulder, she heard something fall to the ground. Maybe she didn't zip up her backpack all the way and something fell out. But the look on Alice's face told her otherwise, and she wasn't even looking at Bella. Alice was looking _behind _her. So Bella turned around, and what she saw, made her gasp.

An iPhone, probably new, was lying on the ground, the screen unbelievably cracked. What was even worse was the look on Douche Master's face as he gaped at the destroyed cell phone.

"I'm so sorry," Bella exclaimed. "It was an accident."

"My phone … you broke it. You fucking freak!"

She flinched at his words and took a deep breath. "Look, I'll pay for the damages. I really am sorry …"

Douche Master walked towards Bella, stopping so that he was merely one inch away. He looked down with malicious eyes and said, "Just because no one likes you at this school, in this _town, _doesn't mean you have to punish _me. _Do you know how much that phone costs? You may have a nice car and you live in a nice house, but that's your parent's money. You, alone, well … you ain't worth fucking shit."

"Hey! Back off, asshole," Bella heard Alice yell, pushing Douche Master in the chest. "It was an accident. I saw it. Cry a river, build a bridge, and _get the fuck over it_."

For a long time, Douche Master stared at Bella, his eyes sending a string of profanities. He huffed and shook his head. "Fucking Duck," He muttered just before he picked up his trashed cell phone and left.

It wasn't until he pushed through the school doors and the bitter, wet air kissed her skin did Bella realize that a bunch of people had watched the scene. She felt her face get cold and she immediately glanced at the floor. Alice linked her arm through Bella's, and led her towards her car. Bella unlocked the doors with shaky hands and got inside. It was rainy days like this did Bella wonder why her parents got her a convertible. Luckily, the roof was up, but it still made her wonder.

Bella pulled out of the parking lot, and it was silent in the car until they reached the intersection. From there, Alice showed Bella the way to her house. It wasn't as far away from the school compared to Bella's, but still a lengthy drive. Alice lived in one of the newer communities, where most of the houses sort of looked the same. Bella was relieved that Alice didn't bring up what had happened, and only talked when she told her where to go. Finally, they reached her house, and for a few minutes, the two of them just sat in the car completely silent. Only the pitter-patter of the rain to keep some sort of noise within them.

Alice sighed. "Thank you so much, Bella. I'm really glad I didn't have to call my brother to pick me up. Knowing Emmett, he would have picked me up and his car would be filled with such thick tension that it could be cut with a knife."

"Like I said, it's no problem."

"Look, I know you don't really want to talk about what just happened, and I'm completely cool with that. I just want you to know that I really do consider you my friend, and that if you ever want to vent, I'm here."

Bella looked at Alice and gave her a smile. "Thanks, Alice. I'll remember that."

The car door opened and Alice stepped out. And just before she shut the door, Alice said, "If it makes you feel any better, I still think that Edward is a bastard."

So as Bella drover herself home, she realized, that for the first time after meeting Alice, that maybe the two weren't so different. That maybe they really could be friends.

And if Bella was being completely honest – she didn't mind.

**x x x x x x**

Dinner was just as unpleasant as it was every night. The only thing that was different was that tonight, Bella felt especially guilty. She wasn't the biggest fan of Douche Master; in fact, she was _far _from even being his fan. After everything he had done to her, after making fun of her and scolding her, she still felt awful. Because this time, what had happened wasn't made on purpose. Bella had no intention to break the dude's expensive cell phone. If she did, then she probably wouldn't have felt so culpable.

Or maybe it was what Douche Master had said. She already knew she wasn't worth shit; he didn't have to say it out loud. Especially not right in her face, not when the majority of the student body was watching.

Or maybe the whole entire situation was fucked up.

"Another stomach ache?" Phil asked just before he stuffed a good amount of spaghetti in his mouth.

Bella looked up from her plate. "Huh?"

"You're not eating – are you not feeling well?"

She didn't even realize that she had not been eating. And as she stared at her plate, she noted the untouched spaghetti. "No, I – I'm okay. I was just thinking about my day."

"Well, try to appreciate the food your mother has given you first, and then you can go reminisce. I work all fucking day to get enough money for groceries, and your mother takes time out of her day to cook for not just us, but you as well. Try to be grateful about it."

"I am grateful," Bella mumbled.

"Then fucking show it!" He yelled.

Renee touched his hand. "Phil, you're taking things out of context …"

"I am not. Our daughter has to learn that the world doesn't revolve around her – that she can't be such a brat."

Bella looked at her mother, and just when she thought that Renee was going to argue – be on Bella's side for once, she shut her mouth. She pulled her hand away from Phil's and began eating the spaghetti. Bella scoffed. Like Renee would _ever_ be on her side. Bella felt silly for even thinking, _hoping, _that tonight Renee would do something for her daughter. Pissed off, Bella took her plate and went upstairs to her room. No one stopped her, so when she closed her bedroom door, she placed the spaghetti on her desk. Not really wanting to eat it anymore.

Only three more hours and she could go to bed. For some odd reason, Bella couldn't go to sleep anytime before nine o'clock at night. It was just impossible for her. She didn't really want to leave her room, so the only thing that could keep her busy was homework. She was able to finish her essay on the French Revolution for social studies within an hour, and biology and chemistry homework done in another. About a half hour before nine, however, Bella found herself blankly staring at her math textbook, full of information about linear regressions. The unit alone was hard enough for Bella to wrap her head around, but now she was feeling the same guilt she had been feeling earlier at dinner.

She tapped her pencil against her desk, her head resting in her hand as she bit her lip. She _hated _feeling so guilty. And knowing her, it was never going to go away until she did something about it. Bella got up from her desk and walked towards her closet. Up on the top shelf was a shoebox. She pulled it and opened the lid, revealing the money she had been saving since she was ten. She had been saving because her plan for her eighteenth birthday was to run away. She wanted to leave Forks and her family. She wanted to leave all the ridicule behind. Bella knew she needed money if she wanted to survive on her own. She sighed and counted around one hundred dollars. As much as she wanted to keep her money, she knew that this was the only way to rid her of the unwanted feeling. Besides, it was only a hundred bucks; it wasn't like it was the biggest loss.

Once she got her money, Bella put the shoebox back in her closet and grabbed a coat, stuffing the bills into the pocket. She grabbed a piece of paper and a marker and headed out. Renee was probably taking a shower by now – her prediction was confirmed when she heard the water running – and Phil was usually watching TV at this time. He never really paid attention to anything else when it came to his late night television, so Bella wasn't worried about being caught. She slipped out of the front door with ease, remembering to close it gently.

The rain had stopped, and hopefully it would cease until tomorrow. It was still chilly though, and Bella pulled her hood over her head for some warmth. She walked towards her neighbor's house and looked up – the lights were still on. Hopefully no one would be looking out the window.

When she was standing in front of Douche Master's car, she pulled out the money and stuck it under the windshield wiper. With the marker and paper, Bella scribbled on it and stuck it right beside the money. She looked at it to make sure that it was obvious enough so that Douche Master wouldn't be stupid and drive with the money stuck on the window.

_Sorry about your phone. Hopefully this amount will suffice for the repairs._

Bella nodded in satisfaction and turned back towards her house. She wasn't too worried about the money being stolen – the citizens of Forks weren't exactly the criminal type. She was glad that the remorse was gone. Bella just hoped that that day was going to be the worst day of the school year, so that every other day would only be slightly awful, just like it always was.

* * *

**Twitter: ****kaarinaaxo**

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**Howdy! Quick update, huh? One week! HA! I feel like patting myself on the back. But I won't, because I'm too sore from choreography to really move. Anyways, I know Bella is badly bullied at her school, but that is needed for the story to be. It gets better though. Sort of? Maybe .. muhahaha. **

**Some of you asked when the big suicide scene is coming .. my answer is REALLY SOON! Look out for that one. Also, the next chapter is really long .. like, possibly one of the longest chapters I have ever written. Should you be excited? Yes, yes you should. Why? Well, because you should be, silly! Haha.**

**Thank you so much for the response you have given me for the first chapter. Honestly, that is above and beyond what I had expected. **

**REVIEW PLEASE. AND WATCH OUT FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER.**

**ohh. and ... review! hahah :)**

**Karina.**


	3. Chapter Three: Extremity

Chapter Three: Extremity

Bella stared at herself in the mirror the next morning, fully rejuvenated and as ready as she could ever be. And as she kept on observing her appearance, for once, she was pleased with what she was looking at. Her hair was soft, the waves perfectly falling to the middle of her back. Her eyes seemed brighter, more of a lighter brown than the usual dull façade. And her outfit – well, it wasn't too shabby. Bella knew the reason why she liked her outfit was because Renee had chosen it for her. For a long time now, Bella had noticed that when Renee felt guilty about something, she would choose Bella's outfit. Almost like she was saying sorry for Phil giving her a hard time, and not doing anything about it. That this was her way of making things a little easier in the mornings. It was one of the things that indicated that Renee cared about Bella.

So as she fixed her tiered floral, woven top and tucked it into her black skinny jeans, she decided it was too cold to wear just that. Bella walked to her closet and swept through the racks, finally landing on a gray cardigan. Cardigans worked in the fall, right? Layering and all that? Bella shrugged at the thought and looked at the mirror one more time, she looked pretty damn good. She slipped on some ballet flats and picked up her backpack before departing her bedroom.

It had occurred to Bella that maybe she was in a good mood this morning because of the dream she had. It was marvelous. She had never had a dream so beautiful before … it was refreshing. Much like her other dreams, Bella was running in a forest – lost. She decided that it was metaphorical, that her constant dreams were telling her that she was forlorn, looking for something that would never happen. But unlike the other dreams, where Bella would never find her way out of the dark forest, Bella had stepped into this meadow. It wasn't the fact that she had actually seen something this time; it was that instead of the darkness, she was surrounded by color.

Blues. Pinks. Purples. Greens. Every single color, every shade, and every hue … this meadow had it. It was like the Sun shone only in that meadow, nowhere else. All Bella did was sit on the grass, picking flowers and smelling them, smiling as butterflies flew above her. She never looked back at the murky forest because all she wanted to do was to stay in the meadow forever. But then she woke up. And instead of waking up sweaty and short of breath, Bella rose with ease.

Hopefully that meant that today was going to be a good day. It had to.

"I see that you're wearing the clothes I chose for you," Renee said when Bella walked into the kitchen.

She dropped her backpack on the floor beside her chair. "Yeah. Thanks, by the way. It really saved me time." She grabbed an apple from the fruit basket and began washing it. It wasn't until Bella turned off the faucet did she realize that she was humming.

"Good sleep?" Renee questioned.

Bella bit her lip. "You could say that."

"Oh, honey. Your friend Alice called and asked if you could give her a drive to school. I said yes, is that okay?"

"Yeah, no problem at all. I should go now then, if we want to be at school on time."

Renee nodded. "Have a good day, Bella."

"Yup," Was all Bella said as she grabbed her backpack and keys, closing the front door behind her.

Bella didn't want to let the thought of Renee not even bringing up last night ruin her light mood. So she shrugged it off and got into the driver's seat, taking a big bite of her apple. She glanced over to her left, seeing if Douche Master had received the money. However, his car wasn't there. She sighed and shook her head.

_Whatever. I gave the fucking money, it's the thought that counts._

It took a little while for Bella to remember exactly how to get to Alice's house. She hadn't really paid any attention the day before, and she regretted it. And after three wrong turns, two wrong houses, and one wrong community, Bella saw Alice's house. Well, she wouldn't have known it was her house, but luckily the pixie herself was sitting on her front porch. When she saw Bella's car pull up, she sprung from her seat and ran for shelter. It was chilly outside, and all she had on was a dress and boots.

"Why didn't you wait for me inside? I could have rang your doorbell," Bella said the minute Alice shut the door.

She shrugged. "Brother issues. I didn't really want to face his bullshit this morning."

"But it's cold – "

"Just drop it, Bella. Okay?" Alice snapped. Bella didn't even nod; she just focused on the road. She wasn't going to push – consider it dropped. "Did you get lost finding my house?"

Bella clicked her tongue. "More or less."

Alice laughed. "You got lost."

It seemed like the whole mishap of Alice's brother had vanished, because soon after that, both Alice and Bella were laughing. Alice still hadn't brought up yesterday's scene with Douche Master, and Bella's respect for her seemed to rise. There needed to be more people like Alice in Forks – someone who wasn't all up in someone else's shit.

The school parking lot was filled with students. It made Bella wonder why they didn't just converse inside, it was wet and cold outside. Did standing in the rain make a person cool? If so, then the people of Forks needed to get their priorities straight. When Bella parked, she made sure that she was nowhere near Douche Master's vehicle. She didn't want to approach her baby with a dent, if he was still pissed off with her. But as she scanned the parking lot, she noticed that he wasn't there. She rolled her eyes – Douche Master probably skipped. There really was no hope for him in the future, anyways.

"You ready?" She heard Alice ask, just as she took the keys out of the ignition.

Bella looked around once more before nodding. "Yeah, let's get going."

"I wish he would stop staring at me," Alice said, her gaze towards the left building of the school. Bella followed her stare and found Emmett. His curly brown, almost black hair was drenched in water. His blue eyes were so sharp, glancing from Alice to her, and then back to Alice. He was biting his cheek and glaring, until Rosalie came up behind him. Bella looked back at Alice and saw her wrinkle her nose at the scene.

"What's his problem?" Bella wondered.

Alice shrugged, still watching Emmett and Rosalie hugging. "I've been asking that question ever since we got here."

Deciding to switch the subject, Bella asked, "What do you have first period?"

"Math, unfortunately. I feel like vomiting every single time I enter that room. Fucking functions … such a waste of time."

"It's better than having chemistry."

"Oh, that sucks," Alice sympathized. The bell rang, just when Bella reached her locker. "Damn, I'm going to be late. I'll see you in French class, okay?"

Bella nodded, waving as Alice ran down the hallway to her math class.

**x x x x x x**

"_She probably spends her free time holed up in the corner of her room."_

"_Her skin is so pale – she needs to get herself a fucking tan."_

"_Doesn't 'bella' mean, 'beautiful' in Italian? Bitch needs to get her name changed to something accurate … like, Freak."_

The harsh words coming out of her classmates' mouths were the most irritating sounds in the world. Especially since they didn't know what the hell they were talking about. They didn't know Bella, and were probably only bad-mouthing her because of Douche Master, or maybe even Angela. Either way, they were pathetic, falling over people who didn't know the difference between the alphabet and the numbers from one to twenty-six.

However, as much as she wanted to ignore their comments and move on, Bella couldn't help but listen to what they were saying. She felt like she was being under assumption when no one really knew who she was. She hated it. But like always, she turned her cheek.

"Shut the fuck up and do your damn tests, already," Bella muttered under her breath as she answered the first question on top of page three. No one heard her, but she tried her damn hardest to focus on the test and not her thoughts. She really needed to pass this.

Luckily, the rest of the class had been silent, and Bella was able to answer each question to the best of her ability. So when she handed in her test to her teacher, all she could do was hope that she did all right. She sat in her desk with her legs stretched out and her arms crossed over her chest, watching as the hands on the clock moved. Once in a while, she would see someone look back and stare at her, like she was some sort of member of the circus. Bella narrowed her eyes at every one of them until they turned the fuck around. One girl, she noticed was watching her. Except, she wasn't glaring or shaking her head at Bella, she was simply _watching. _It wasn't until Bella finally made eye contact did she turn her face into a scowl. This only proved her point – no one at Forks High School knew who Bella was as a person, they only know her as the Duck, the freak of nature Douche Master had created in his fucked up head.

The bell finally rang, and everyone who hadn't finished before then had to hand in their tests. Bella collected her things and stood up, noticing that the girl who had stared at Bella was still sitting and gathering her belongings. It was then that Bella decided to go against Alice's observation – she wasn't going to stand with anyone's shit. At least, she'll try to not stand with anyone's shit. It was different when they weren't Douche Master.

Bella walked right up to the girl with square framed glasses and silver blonde hair. She was slender, and wore jeans and a t-shirt. Bella didn't know her name, but she knew that the girl had lived in Forks for about four years now. She never really had a chance to introduce herself to the girl, since she wasn't given the chance.

"I saw you looking at me," Bella said.

The girl looked up at Bella, pushing her glasses farther on the bridge of her nose. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Bella scoffed. "I saw you, so don't even think about lying to me. Do you want something?"

The girl looked around, almost like she was making sure no one was around her. Like she was afraid people might see her with Bella. "Look, I'm sorry I stared. It's just … I don't really know why everyone hates you. Sorry, Bella."

She knew her name? Wow, now Bella felt bad for not knowing hers. But how did she know her name, when all everyone has ever called her is the Duck? So, lamely, Bella muttered, "Oh."

The girl smiled at her, and Bella saw that she probably wasn't that bad of a person. And just when she was going to ask for her name, a snotty voice yelled, "Lauren!" Both the girl, whose name was Lauren, and Bella looked at the door. There, stood Rosalie Hale. "You ready to go? I've been waiting for you for forever."

Rosalie strutted over to where Bella and Lauren were standing in her ankle boots with heels so high it was almost impossible to walk in. "Why are you talking to _her_? The bitch broke Edward's phone yesterday."

"It was an accident," Bella corrected. Rosalie then looked at Bella like she was the most horrendous thing on the planet, making Bella look down at her feet.

"So, are you ready?" Rosalie asked again.

"Yeah," Lauren replied. "I would have been out sooner but this freak wanted to borrow some of my foundation. I kept on telling her that she should use bronzer since she's so freaking pale." Bella could not believe what she was hearing. Wasn't this Lauren chick just saying that she didn't know why everyone was so mean to her? What a hypocritical bitch.

"Why do you need to borrow foundation? You can always buy your own," Rosalie sneered. "Oh, wait, I forgot. Your parents probably cut you off because, _you ain't worth shit_." The two laughed at Rosalie's quoting of Edward's hurtful words. "C'mon. I don't know if Edward's here today, but if he is, he's probably waiting for us at our lockers."

Bella watched as Rosalie and Lauren left. Neither of the two looked back, and Bella was glad. Because when she was sure they wouldn't see her, she flipped them off.

**x x x x x x**

_What the hell was her problem? _Bella wondered to herself.

Rosalie was glaring at Bella from the other side of the room; her piercing blue eyes seemed to look into her soul. People would have to be crazy _not _to be scared of Rosalie Hale. While she had the features of an angel, her personality was that of the devil. Hell, even Bella was scared of the bitch. She wasn't scared of Douche Master or Angela – they were just irritating. Rosalie, on the other hand, supported Douche Master no matter what. Well, so did Angela, but that was because everyone knew that she was so in love with the loser. Why? Bella had no freaking idea. She seriously could not see the same attraction in him that every other girl saw. However, Rosalie was different. She was best friends with Douche Master, and if he didn't like someone, she didn't either. What was worse was that her wrath was scarier than Blair Waldorf from _Gossip Girl _– yeah, Bella watched that show, she wasn't afraid to admit it.

In short, Rosalie could be a fucking monster when she wanted to be.

Bella began to ignore Rosalie's stare, trying to focus on the assignment Mr. Cormier had given to the class. She didn't know why she had taken French as a language class – she already knew French fluently. She could have taken Italian, and then she wouldn't have been this bored every second day, third period. But then again, if she hadn't signed up for this class, she would have never met Alice – her first friend.

Thinking of Alice, Bella noticed how quiet the room was. Alice's chatter usually brought the class to their own little discussion with each other, thinking that it was okay to talk endlessly for the rest of the lesson. But when Bella turned her head to the right, she saw that the desk was empty, having no trace of Alice at all. Bella wondered where the girl could be, since she had drove her to school this morning. Maybe she went home sick, or just skipped class for shits and giggles. Bella didn't know, but she was definitely going to ask Alice later.

Or she could just ask her right now.

Alice's petite size slipped through the door, and she smiled sheepishly to Mr. Cormier. "Sorry I'm late," she apologized. Mr. Cormier waved his hand dismissively and told her to go to her seat. Alice did just that, and when she reached her desk, she collapsed into the seat and asked, "What did I miss?"

Bella saw that Alice's eyes were puffy, her eyes were rimmed with red and she sniffled. She had been crying. "What's wrong?"

Alice shook her head, as if to tell Bella that she didn't want to talk about it. "I'm thinking that we go to Port Angeles this Saturday and get some shopping done? I haven't had my fix since California, and I'm about to explode," she said, obviously changing the subject.

"Um," Bella mumbled, lost at words. "Yeah, okay. I mean, I'm not the biggest fan of shopping, but it sounds like fun," it also sounded like a nice getaway from Forks. "I'll pick you up at eleven on Saturday morning, then?"

Alice clapped. "Sounds like a plan! Oh, Bella, we're going to have so much fun. You may not like shopping now, but trust me. One session with me and you'll have a new perspective."

That's what Renee had said, but Bella was still letting her mother shop for her clothes without her. And it wasn't like Bella hated clothes – she just didn't see the point. Why try and look good when everyone is just going to hate anyways? She didn't see the effort in glamour when she would just be ridiculed. People would say that she wasn't wearing the clothes; the clothes were wearing her. Or that she was trying to be a wannabe. And blah, blah, blah. It wasn't worth her time. She'd rather be comfy and bullied than in some itchy shirt and bullied.

Just then, Bella could feel Rosalie looking at her again. Holy fuck, could she just leave her alone? Was that so much to ask? Bella grumbled profanities, and turned back to her assignment, writing harder than usual. She ignored Rosalie again, and thought about her marvelous dream. If only she could be surrounded by the beautiful palette of flowers again, and in peace with the sounds of the calming waterfalls. She wished that butterflies fluttered their wings around her, and that the sun was shining with clear blue skies. Unfortunately, Forks was the complete opposite. There was only one color in the town, and it was green. Green everywhere, and it was boring as hell. The only waterfall was that coming from the rooftops, and butterflies barely showed themselves in this environment. Bella didn't even want to get started with they sky in Forks, because the only color sky the town got was gray.

Oh, if only dreams could come true, and then she wouldn't have to be here. She would be on the beach, or maybe even in Canada, where she could escape to Montreal. She heard that city was absolutely stunning, and wouldn't mind migrating there. But she was still sixteen, and a minor. She couldn't just leave. However, she would be seventeen soon, and then next year she would be eighteen. Only twelve more months!

"I still don't know why my brother is so interested in Blondie," Alice whispered to Bella, ultimately bringing her out of her reverie.

Bella knew why Alice's brother, Emmett – was that his name? – liked Rosalie. It was obvious. Rosalie was beautiful, and he was a guy. Put two and two together and the answer would be hormones. But instead of saying that, Bella replied with, "Maybe he sees something in her."

Though that was a lie, because the only thing Rosalie had deep down inside for everyone to see was the exact same thing she wanted everyone to know. She was a bitch – or _the _bitch. Not even Angela could compare to that level of crass and vulgarity. As if to read Bella's mind, Alice scoffed and laughed a little as she continued to work on the assignment. And when Bella looked up to see what the time was, since her stomach was grumbling and she desperately wanted lunch period to start, she made the mistake of making eye contact with Rosalie. She was still glaring daggers at her. So Bella quickly looked at the clock and sighed. 11:57 – only three minutes left. Until then, Bella reviewed the assignment.

Reviewing was a waste of time, however, since all Bella could think was, _what the fuck was the bitch's problem?_

**x x x x x x**

Lunch had passed by without incident. Why? Well, because Douche Master was not in the cafeteria. And from what she heard, he wasn't seen on campus at all. The day seemed to be looking up as she chewed on her pasta. Aside from the tiny whispers about her – which wasn't really new – and the occasional and annoying glower from Rosalie, it was almost as if she had slipped into invisibility. Like, without Douche Master in presence, no one had the motivation to derision her. If only he wouldn't show up more often, then maybe life would be _slightly _easier. Slightly.

**x x x x x x**

Douche Master chose a really good fucking day to miss. Of course, that statement was used with complete sarcasm, because now Bella would be behind in this assignment. Granted, they had the whole year to finish, but that didn't mean she didn't want to get started. Maybe she was pissed because that meant she would have to spend _even more_ time with Douche Master. But she wanted this done so that they could have this finished sooner, and therefore would have to see each other less. However, they couldn't do that. He. Wasn't. Fucking. Here. Seriously, what was so important that he had to miss a whole day of classes? Didn't he know that missing one day of High School was like missing a whole unit in a course? Dumb ass.

Even worse, the project was to write a novel. Yes, a goddamn novel. Not a short story, or a poem. _A novel. _The minimum was one hundred fifty pages, and it had to be finished in order to get full credits. She was basically marking this on the rubric of us being able to finish, along with being excellent collaboration partners. They would only have one class a month to work on it, and every other time would have to be outside of school. Everyone started brainstorming with their partners, except for Bella. Instead, she jotted down some of her ideas to try and pass the time. Bella felt like saying to Douche Master that he didn't have a say in the theme of the story since he missed the first day, but she knew that he would disagree and then an argument would stir, and nothing would get done. So, she decided to be a nice bitch as she wrote in her notebook.

"Bella," Mrs. Anderson said, her eyes wondering to what she was writing.

Bella looked up from her notebook and blinked twice before replying, "Yes?"

Mrs. Anderson took Douche Master's empty seat, scooting it closer to Bella's. She folded her hands on her knees, her legs crossed. Bella waited expectantly – did the woman just have to stare at her like that and for that long? She wondered if she was in some sort of trouble. If so, then her excuse was that Douche Master was not in school today, and therefore she was left to work alone. And she _was_ working alone; putting together plots and characters. She just made it more vulgar than usual because of her mood.

"I just want to make sure that you tell Edward about this project. I know you two don't like each other, but I really do want you to work together on this," Mrs. Anderson told her,

"I will – I'm not going to be doing this project alone."

"Good, good," She smiled, beginning to stand up. Bella thought the conversation was over, until her teacher spoke again. "You know, I was reading that assignment you and Edward did yesterday. Very well done – one hundred percent."

Bella quirked an eyebrow. "Thanks. But it was only an editing assignment."

"Ah, yes. But editing with a partner is almost as hard as writing with one. The fact that you two were even able to do it at all was outstanding. The majority of the class gave up!" Mrs. Anderson fixed her skirt and leaned on the desk. "Like I said, I know you and Edward don't have the best relationship, but you do make a good partnership. Think about that."

With that final word, Mrs. Anderson moved onto the other students. Bella sighed at her comment. Her and Douche Master, a good partnership? Ha! It was laughable. The only thing Douche Master and Bella had in common was the fact that they hated each other. And if that was not indication that they would never be excellent partners, she didn't know what was.

**x x x x x x**

As if her day couldn't get any worse, Bella remembered it was a Thursday. She despised Thursdays. The fourth day of the week was the day she had to mop the floor. The Swan Household was spacious, and having to clean the damn floors was a bitch. Renee thought that Swiffers would ruin her precious flooring. So, she wasn't really any help. Bella knew that the reason she was the one to clean the floors was because Renee also thought that cleaning it was a pain. Plus Phil didn't do shit around the house – he was a lost cause.

After Bella dropped Alice off and made her way home, Bella walked into the house. It was surprisingly quiet, and when she set her keys on the counter, it made a _clank _sound.

"Mom? Dad?" Bella yelled, her voice echoing through the halls. "Is anyone home?" Walking farther into the house, Bella made her way to the closet where they held all of their cleaning supplies. Opening it, the first thing she saw was the mop and the bucket. It sat in the middle of the closet, basically mocking her as she glared at it. However, when Bella squinted, she saw a note taped to the deep blue stick. She took the note off the mop and read it.

_Ah, fuck._

Renee had gone to get groceries, which meant that Bella better have the floors sparkling by the time her mom got home. She quickly grabbed the mop and the bucket, filling the bucket with hot water and cleaning solution. Maybe the only thing Bella liked about mopping was that the cleaning solution smelled like autumn – crisp with a spice … like cinnamon. She hummed to an unknown tune, her uncoordinated feet making messy dance steps as she swept.

After this, Bella had to get started on her homework. She had an exam in chemistry and math, plus a project in humanities. Not to mention that stupid writing assignment she had to tell Douche Master about. However, the last part wasn't part of her homework. She would just tell him tomorrow, that is, if he bothered to show his lazy ass up.

_Sweep. Sweep. Mop. Mop. Dunk. Dunk. Squeeze. Squeeze. Sweep. Sweep …_

As she danced, Bella felt her hip bump into something. A light tap hit the tiled floor. She glanced down, and saw the mail had fallen to the ground, the clutter beginning to get wet as they stuck to the freshly cleaned floors. Bella jumped down, scurrying as she picked up each and every letter, making sure that nothing was too damaged in case it would be important. One paper, however, was in the color of ivory. That thick piece of paper was the one on the bottom, and the unfortunate one to get the one most soaked. She fanned it, hurrying the drying process. However, as Bella looked at her fanned paper, she noticed that the letter was written in a neat black calligraphy.

And her name was mentioned in it numerous of times.

She stopped fanning and began to read the letter, making sure she read each word with complete focus. When she reached the end of the letter, it was like her heart had stopped. Like everything she knew was a lie, and she didn't know what to think. Her mind scrambled for some sort of logical answer, but there was none. Bella's fingers trembled as she stood up slowly. Out of anger, she kicked the bucket. The water sprayed all over the floor, and she watched as the soapy fluid flowed along the white tiles. The overwhelming smell of autumn was the only thing keeping her from not punching the wall.

**x x x x x x**

The door closed with a loud slam, the cold wind carried in through the entry of the hallway. Bella stood, her hands in fists. Renee was all smiles as she carried in the groceries, until she almost fell. She looked down, and there she saw that she was standing in what looked like a miniature pond.

"What's this, Bella? Did you trip over the bucket again?" She chuckled, setting the groceries down on the dry spot of the floor. "Here, sweetie. I'll help you clean it up." Bella didn't move. She stayed in the same stance as Renee began to walk away. When Renee noticed that Bella had made no comment or even flinched, she looked at her with concern. "Are you okay, honey?"

Bella decided to just go out with it, knowing she can't hold her curiosity and anger any longer. "Who's Charlie?"

Renee seemed struck with her question, and Bella almost smirked. But she didn't, she wanted answers. "What?" She asked, acting stupid.

"Don't act like you don't know!" Bella yelled, tears forming in her eyes. "I saw the letter. Is it true?"

Renee looked her in the eye, and for once, it was like she was able to see Bella's need for her mom. That need of honesty. "Yes, it's true."

Bella ran a hand through her hair, crying now. "Oh my God." She felt Renee's hands on her shoulders. She was saying sweet things in her ear to calm her down. But Bella pushed her away. "When were you going to tell me?"

"I was going to tell you when you turned seventeen …"

"Liar!" Bella screamed. "Liar, liar, liar! The letter said I was supposed to know when I was fourteen. I'm sixteen now, I should have known _two years ago._"

Bella heard the front door open and close. "You should have known what two years ago?" Phil asked as he took off his coat.

"Nothing, Phil," Renee said, letting go of Bella. She watched as her Mom walked up to Phil. She gave him a loving kiss on the cheek, almost like nothing happened. It was sick. "How was your day?"

"Good, actually," Phil answered. "We were able to bring sales up by …"

"I know about Charlie," Bella interrupted, still wanting her answers. "And now, I want to know why neither of you told me about him. Told me the truth."

"Bella, not now …" Renee said, her eyes telling her to shut up. There was no way in hell she was going to shut up.

"No, I want to know why I was kept in the dark."

Phil sighed and rubbed the side of his neck. "Bella, Charles Garland does not exist. This guy has been sending us letters forever, I was actually going to get the police involved so we could end this thing."

Bella looked into his eyes, and as she searched, she knew he was lying. His hazel eyes weren't actually looking at her. They were looking at the vase of flowers on the counter beside her. "_Stop lying to me!_ I know he's my real father! Please, I just want to know …"

Suddenly, a heavy weight was pushing Bella against the wall. She could hear her mother gasp, and the heavy breathing in her ear. Phil held Bella so tight – his arm was against her neck, breathing had become hard. She could feel the sweat form on her forehead as she tried to whither her way out of his grasp. But he only pushed harder. Bella was so tightly held against the cold wall that the only things she could do was groan and move her arms. She felt like this was her death sentence.

"Now you listen to me, Isabella," Phil sneered. "I am your father. I have given you everything in the world, and this is what I get? Now, I want you to forget about Charles Garland, or Charlie, and move on like he doesn't exist. You're my daughter, not his."

Bella's throat was so dry from gasping on any air she could get. She couldn't reply so she just nodded weakly. Phil let go of her and Bella took a deep breath of air, holding onto her throat as she began to cough. However, she felt him grab onto her hair and throw her on the ground. Her eye hitting the stairs. She felt a blow to her ribs, and another and another. Finally, he was done, and Bella could feel her limbs throbbing.

"Next time, Bella, when you're mopping the floors, could you make sure you don't trip over the bucket again? It's a bitch to have to dry all of that water," Phil said calmly, like he hadn't just beat her up. She could hear his footsteps farther and farther away, and when she could hear them no longer, she began to get up. Warm, trembling hands touched her sides. It was Renee, but she shoved her away.

"Don't touch me," She whispered. Bella's eyes were filled with tears. "_Do not fucking touch me._"

As Renee lifted her hands off of her, Bella got off the cinnamon smelling floors feebly. She made out the door and left, not even bothering to grab her coat on the way.

**x x x x x x**

Bella ran.

It was raining, and she was drenched in the cold liquid. However, Bella didn't even care the slightest – she just needed to get away. Away from the ridicule from school. Away from the neglect and accusation at home. Away from all of the lies. _Away from her life. _She wanted to rid of all the emotional and physical pain she constantly experienced. Bella didn't know what she had done to receive such hurt. The majority of the things she did were to benefit the people around her. Why was she the one that was punished?

Bella needed to start over. A new life is what would be best for her. But that was easier said than done, and Bella found herself lost. Just like the nightmares she had almost every night.

"Why me?" Bella whispered to herself as she fell to her knees. She was in the middle of the forest now, and it was very, very dark. "Why me, why me, why me?" She cried, wiping her wet hair away from her face.

Starting over would be difficult. She would need money, enough money, to survive. Stupidity rushed through her as she realized that her box of savings was stashed in her closet and her car was still parked in the driveway, with her keys inside the house. There was no way she could leave without going home, and Bella refused to go back to that hellhole. She was stuck here with nowhere else to go. Bella punched the ground several times in frustration, until she felt a sharp sensation in her knuckles. She winced and pulled back, observing her hand. A small drop of blood bubbled on her skin. Confused, she searched the ground for whatever it was that punctured her. A branch or maybe even a rock. But it wasn't either of the two. It was a piece of glass that had been broken from an empty beer bottle not too far away from her.

It was then that Bella discovered her escape – her key to leave forever. The sharp edges of the glass glistened in the dim moonlight, sparkling in the wintry rain. The broken glass seemed to have resembled her life – alone, away from everything else. Shattered and broken. So as Bella brought the object to her arm, she remembered all of her worst nightmares, and tried to replace them with better ones. There weren't any. That only gave Bella all the more reason to do what she was about to do.

_Cut vertically. Not horizontally, _she lectured to herself, _or else your chances of dying are slim. _

The minute the shard of glass made contact with her skin, Bella apologized to Charlie. She was sorry for not finding the truth sooner, and for not ever meeting him. She was sorry for the fact that he would never get to know Bella, that the both of them would never know what the other looked or acted like. Bella was sure that Charlie was a fine man, more of a man than Phil. But she would never know … and for that, she apologized.

She punctured her skin deeply, and she cried out. It hurt so much. She was about to drag down her forearm when she heard yelling.

"Hey!" A deep voice screamed. "What are you doing?"

Bella turned around, only to see Douche Master standing a few feet away from her with wide eyes. "What does it look like I'm doing?" She turned around and was about to continue, when she hear him come closer.

"Look, you don't want to do that," Douche Master said soothingly. Your family will be so depressed if you die."

Bella scoffed. "They wouldn't give a shit if I committed suicide. I'm sure they would be able to move on."

"C'mon, Isabella, don't do this."

He had said her real name for once. It amazed her how beautiful her name was, she never knew. No one ever really called her that. And whenever someone did say it, it was Phil, yelling at her. But as Douche Master said it, calmly and smooth, it sounded nice. But then she remembered everything that he had done to her. "I'm going to do it."

She dug further into her skin.

"No! Wait, what about Alice?"

She stopped. Bella had forgotten about Alice – her new friend. What would happen if Bella died? Would she be mad? Angry at her for leaving her alone in Forks High School. Bella owed it to Alice; she had sacrificed her social reputation just to be friends with the Duck. With that thought she dropped the glass. "Okay," She said, defeated. "I won't – for Alice."

Bella heard him sigh relief. "Good, now let's get you home …"

"No!" She snapped. "I-I can't."

She looked at Douche Master, his bronze hair wet from the rain, making it brown. He took off his jacket and put it around Bella. "Why don't you stay at my house?"

"Are you really inviting me to stay at your house? Aren't you afraid that the Duck with contaminate your family with bird flu?"

Douche Master stared at her blankly, his face closer than she had ever imagined. She could feel his breath. "C'mon, Duckling," He carried her in his arms. "I'm trying to be neighborly."

Bella didn't know what to do as he stood with her in his arms. She nodded, and for a minute, didn't know why she accepted his invitation. She didn't trust Douche Master. But at this point, his option was better than the one that was waiting for her at home. So as he carried her to his house, Bella snuggled into his jacket, which smelled of cinnamon and warmth.

* * *

**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

* * *

**I am back! Sorry this took more than a week to update, but school - as usual - was an asshole. I just got off school yesterday for winter break. But before that, my teachers were giving me so much homework and studying that it was insane. Especially since this semester is almost done as well, they're trying to prepare us for finals. So yeah, that's why I couldn't update. TOO MUCH DAMN HOMEWORK! haha. **

**Anyways, with updating being said, I just wanted to let you all to know that I won't be updating updating until the middle of January. If you're follow me on twitter, you would know that I'm leaving for the Philippines on the 25th. I'm going there for my cousin's wedding, as well as the fact that I haven't been there since I was 11. While all of my mom's family has moved out of the Philippines and are living in Canda, US, and Switzerland ... My dad's family still lives in Bacolod City. And yeah, I haven't seen them in four years. It's kind of sad, but I'm excited to see them again (and get a tan!). ANYWAYS, as I was saying, while I'm there I won't have time to update. Besides the fun stuff people do on vacation, my teachers also gave me homework for the days I am missing. fml. I get back on the 12th of January. My exam dates go like this: Religion, January 13 - Social Studies, January 18 - Math, January 20. You can expect Chapter 4 around those times. Thank God for exam break.**

**Thank you guys for your continued support. It means so much to me. Trust me, time will fly by until the next update. There's Christmas and New Year's, as well as the _lovely _welcoming of the first day back at school. We can make the long update wait together - a team ;)**

**MERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL OF YOU!**

**Stay safe, my lovely readers :) I'll see you in 2011!**

**Don't forget to REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!**

**Karina.**


	4. Chapter Four: Exposure

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. But I own a tan, that will hopefully last for a bit :)

* * *

Chapter Four: Exposure

_**Edward**_

Edward hated missing school. A day unattended might as well have been like missing an entire semester. Not many of his peers were aware of this, but he excelled in academics. Well, Edward didn't really want anyone to know – he had to keep up his reputation. So whenever he was handed back an assignment or an exam, he would hide it in his binder, or stuff it in his pocket. And when one of his friends would ask what he had received, Edward would simply shrug it off and reply by saying that he had gotten a shitty grade. Only his best friend, Rosalie Hale, knew of his IQ. She was also the only girl in Forks High School that wasn't infatuated with him (Well, there was Bella Swan, but her high status of 'Freak' brought the girl to question). The thought of Rose taking interest in him, and vice versa, made Edward mentally cringe. The two had known each other since birth, and were practically siblings. Them liking each other in that manner would be like incest.

It was also because they were so close, did Edward hate not telling Rose the reason he sometimes didn't show up in school. Granted, he only missed school once a month, but he knew that Rose would think it was because he just wanted to skip. It was better that she thought of it that way. No one but his immediate family knew – Edward did not need pity. Hell, he sometimes even told himself that it wasn't real, only because he didn't want self-pity. This was _his _family, not his friends'.

"It's going to be okay, Mom," Edward murmured to Esme, who sat nervously beside him. Edward had been coming to the hospital once a month since he had known life itself. He had been scared at first, simply because his parents had been, but now, at seventeen-years-old, Edward learned to be strong. Especially for Esme.

His mother sighed and took his hand in both of hers. "I know. I just worry."

Edward rolled his eyes. "You don't need to. Dad is going to walk out of those doors and tell us everything is fine."

Surely enough, his father, Carlisle, walked through the double doors with a grin. Everything was okay. And as Carlisle also told Esme that she had nothing to worry about, that the family was safe, Edward took in his parents' features. Edward was the younger version of Carlisle, so much so that it was almost creepy. However, instead of he blonde hair and deep blue eyes, Edward had inherited his copper colored locks and green orbs from his mother. And yeah, he knew he was hot. What could he say? He was a cocky bastard. Emphasis on cocky.

Actually, that was a lie. He had only had sex once, and it was with the person he never thought it would happen with. In fact, he was still in denial that it ever happened – Edward preferred it if he could erase it form his mind. But he couldn't, and thoughts of that night haunted him in random hours of the day. It was maddening and sickening.

But other than that, Edward stuck to dating. He didn't date many girls form Forks – since he'd known them since pre-k, and it was weird thinking of being with them like that – most of them were from Port Angeles or Seattle, sometimes even California. However, for some reason, he couldn't find the one. No matter how hot the girls were – the girls in California, two words, fucking A – he couldn't feel that connection. However, Edward was a true believer in love, despite what the Duck might have thought, and would keep on looking.

"Edward, can you drop me off at home?" He heard Esme ask him as they began to exit the hospital.

Edward looked at his mother and gave her a genuine smile. Esme was inspirational – though she was scared for every monthly check-up, he could see her strength. She was the rock of the family. "Sure thing, Mom."

"Don't go to school today, honey. I need you to do some errands for me."

He sighed – he was probably missing so much already. But whatever, Edward would do it for his mom. He nodded and stuffed his hands in his pocket, feeling the rough packet of bills. He had forgotten about that. Earlier that morning, Edward had gone to the hospital alone because Esme had driven with Carlisle. As he was approaching his BMW, he caught sight of a note. Edward had picked it up with his fingerprints, reading the messy script. It had been from the Duck, apologizing for what had happened yesterday. And like she said yesterday, she had given him money for repairs. It was probably more than enough. Edward then felt guilty for what he had said to her. Esme did not raise him like that, she raised him to be a gentleman. Yesterday's actions were definitely not ones of a mature young man.

Edward realized that he had over reacted. Not even Isabella Swan deserved to be yelled at for a reason such as breaking a phone that was replaceable. Even after what she had done to Rosalie, she still didn't deserve that. So today, he was going to give back the money, and ask for her forgiveness.

When Edward had dropped off his mother, he remembered how badly Rosalie had come crying to him in the summer of eighth grade. It was a normal summer day in the town of Forks – if it could even be considered a summer day – and Edward, then fourteen, was joyful about getting his learner's permit. He was about to call Rosalie when she came knocking on his door. His best friend was in a puddle of tears. Of course Edward put his good news aside and helped Rose, listening as she told him the story.

The new kid, Tyler, who had just moved in from New York was all Rosalie had talked about since the minute he stepped into Forks. She was completely infatuated with him. They had been on several dates, and she thought she was in love … until she supposedly saw the way Tyler was looking at Isabella. At first, Edward was skeptical. Isabella, really? He had known her all of his life and never did he think she would capture someone's attention like that. Especially someone like Tyler – who was a jock and a shallow male. But he trusted Rosalie, and from then on, hated Isabella as well. Well, not hated. But disliked her. She had made Rose cry, and that was unacceptable. In his rage and over protectiveness, he had started calling her names and treating her like shit. Now everyone at school called her the Duck or the Freak, and constantly ridiculed her. Edward honestly didn't mean for it to go as far as it did, but Rosalie didn't seem to mind.

And because they were like siblings, he didn't mind either.

But he still felt guilty for the things he had said yesterday. Edward would not tell Rosalie of his begging for forgiveness – she would have his head ripped off within a matter of seconds if she ever found out. But Edward rid of all of his problems and thoughts and read the piece of paper Esme had handed him. The first thing on the list was to get the groceries. Ah, fuck.

**x x x x x x**

After an hour spent in the grocery store, Edward had loaded all of the needed foods into the trunk of his car. Thanking the Lord that that was finally finished, he crossed it off the list Esme had given him. Now he had to go to the family clinic. He got into the drivers seat and turned on the ignition, backing out of his parking spot and smoothly driving onto the road. The family clinic wasn't too far away from the grocery store – maybe a minute or two by drive – and Edward parked just outside of the door. The clinic wasn't usually busy, seeing as how the population of Forks wasn't as large as compared to other major cities.

He was twirling his keys around his finger when he pushed through the glass door. Monica, the receptionist, had recognized him quickly. "Ah, Edward – did Esme send you here again?"

Edward nodded. "Yup. She gave me the payment as well," he said, handing her the money.

Monica, whose hair was now shining a hint of gray, her eyes now showing wisdom as she smiled up at Edward. He had known her ever since his first appointment here, and considered her like an aunt. "You've grown, Edward. How have you been?"

"I've been great, actually. My grades are still good, and I haven't crashed my car yet."

She laughed. "That's good – I wouldn't want you to get into an accident. Which is why you should get rid of that damn motorcycle you have."

"Oh c'mon, Monica," Edward whined. "I'm careful. Besides, I only use it when it's not raining, which isn't very often."

"Okay, I just worry. Anyways, do you know Isabella Swan?"

Edward looked at her curiously. "Yeah. Why?"

She shrugged. "Well, her pain medication has arrived, and she hasn't returned my calls. If you see her, could you tell her that they will be waiting here for her?"

"Um," Edward mumbled. "Okay. Sure. But we don't talk often." Actually, they barely spoke at all. The only time they ever went into a conversation was during Creative Writing class, and it wasn't like it was an easy discussion.

"Thanks, dear. I'll let you on your way. Be careful, Edward. And I hope your family is doing well."

Edward grinned and waved one last time. "I will, and thanks."

He carried the white paper bag in his hands and unlocked his car, throwing the bag into the passenger seat. Edward felt his stomach grumble, and his head go light. Ugh – he hadn't eaten since breakfast. It was well past three in the afternoon, and all he had consumed was a piece of toast and a mug of coffee. Edward reminded himself that after he ate that he would have to get some gas.

Deciding his stomach could not wait, Edward made a two-in-one. He went to the gas station, filled up the tank, and then bought a Lunchable. Yeah, Edward still liked those motherfuckers, they were fast and delicious. After he had finished his snack, Edward felt better. Yet, he wasn't fully satisfied. He knew Esme would be baking something when he got home, he would just eat something then. Driving home, Edward realized how productive his day had been. If he were to miss school, he would rather be at home and relaxing, but no. He was sent to do his mother's errands. He was truly a mama's boy. Well, what the fuck ever.

"Mom!" Edward called, shutting the door with his foot since his hands were full of groceries. "I'm home."

"Hi, sweetie!" He heard Esme. "I'm in the kitchen."

Esme used to be a professional baker, one of the best. But she had sacrificed her dream and her job when health had become an issue. She had decided that she would spend time with the family more, especially Edward. Everyday when he came home, she would kiss his cheek. So when he put the groceries on the countertop, he was greeted with a soft peck. He laughed and wiped it away. He was seventeen and still got kisses from him mother – c'mon.

"Thank you so much for doing this, Edward."

He shrugged. "No problem."

"Did you go to the clinic?"

Edward held up the white paper bag and set it next to the phone. "Signed, sealed, and delivered." He stole a cookie from the tray, it was still hot, and it melted in his mouth.

"Don't you have work today?" Edward nodded still munching on the cookie. "What time is your shift?"

"Um, four-thirty. Why?" He looked up and saw Esme glancing at the clock. He saw the time and started running for the door. "Oh, shit!"

"Language!" Esme lectured. "Oh, and before you have dinner, don't forget to …"

Edward rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, yeah."

He knew the routine. His mother didn't need to remind him.

Within seconds, Edward was in his car and on his way to the diner, where his boss would be waiting impatiently for him to arrive.

**x x x x x x**

When Edward's shift was done, he finally felt well. His dizziness was gone and his stomach was fully satisfied – maybe all he needed was the dinner rush. In his pocket was a good amount of phone numbers from girls, some he would call, and most he would not. In his other pocket was the money Isabella had given him. Edward would return the money to her first, and then he would call those girls.

As he stepped out of the diner the cold wind, which carried slight droplets of water, glided over Edward's skin. He liked the night in Forks. The weather was never too cold, and the stars were always visible. It was quiet and serene – and it was safe. Most did not like the woods that sat on the line of Forks, thinking that they would be attacked. But Edward knew well enough that if he stayed close to civilization, the wilderness would not hurt him, and that he would be free to lie down and gaze at the stars and the moon.

But he was getting ahead of himself. Tonight, he did not have time to go to the woods – he had other things to do. However, when he had gotten out of his car, which was parked on his driveway, and was about to walk over to his neighbor's house, he saw Isabella run out. For a second, he pondered if he should follow her, or wait for her to come back. But he didn't know when she would come back, and she was running. Surely he could catch her. So he ran after her, first slow when he was gaining on her, but quicker as she sped up. The girl had run into the woods, farther than he had ever gone before.

It was darker and creepier, the trees beginning to become very close together. He could barely see as he dodged branches. All he could hear was his panting and his footsteps. He did not know where Isabella was anymore, he had lost her. Edward was lost as well, and tried to turn back, but didn't know where to begin. So he kept on running, searching for a glimpse of her or even the slightest sound of her footsteps. But there was no such luck. He stopped and put his hands on his knees, his throat dry. Where could she have gone? Why was she even running so far into the forest? She must have known how dangerous it was. Of course he knew, but he was idiotic enough to follow her this deep. Now he was in deep shit.

So Edward walked, slowly finding his way back to the town of Forks. Finally, when he had seen the road to his street, Edward almost cried. Yes, almost. He was genuinely terrified that he wouldn't find his way out, and that a wild animal would attack him. But as he was approaching safety, he heard whimpering, and cries of pain. It was Isabella, the Freak, and she was in trouble. He ran back, listening to the sounds the girl was making. All the while he was yelling profanities at her in his head.

_Why the fuck did the bitch run here? Why couldn't she have just stayed home so he could give her the money and get everything over and done with? Dumb shit. Really, is it so hard to just run to her room and – _

Edward had found Isabella, and he could not believe the scene he was witnessing. The sharp blade that was in her hand as it cut down her wrist. He was able to stop her however, from finishing the job. But she didn't want to go home. He knew that her only friend was Emmett's little sister, Alice. He would take her there, but he knew that because Rosalie and Emmett had a thing, that he probably did not like Bella as well. She had nowhere to go … or did she? Edward offered her his house, and surprising him, she accepted.

Feeling sympathy for the girl, he gave her his jacket and carried her all the way to his house. Esme and Carlisle were asleep by now, so sneaking her in would be no problem. But even if they did find out, Edward knew that Esme would not mind. She liked Bella.

Since he now knew his way back, Edward found the street easily. Now in the moonlight, and aid of the streetlights, Edward could now see Bella's profile. She looked horrible – a black eye and a bloody wrist. She clutched her stomach and breathed in shakily, did she hurt her ribs? However, he did not ask, because she had fallen asleep on the way.

Just as he expected, the only light that was on in the house was the single lamp in the entryway. Amazingly, he was able to stick the key in with Isabella in his arms, and close it quietly. He kicked off his shoes and carried her to his room. His parents wouldn't dare to go in there, which was always an advantage.

Still cuddled in his jacket, he put Isabella in his bed. In his room was a first aid kit, since Esme was always thinking of safety, and since Carlisle was a doctor, he knew how to use every item in the kit expertly. He ran to the bathroom and washed his hands, then filled a bucket with lukewarm water. On the way back to his room, he made a quick visit to the linen closet and grabbed a cloth. Edward made his way to the bedroom, closing the door quietly behind him. Isabella was still asleep, her expression not completely relaxed, almost like she was having a nightmare.

Edward made himself comfortable on the ground and gently picked up the arm that was cut. He took a quick look at it – it wasn't infected. With that, he dunked the cloth into the water and wringed it before wiping the cut from all the dirt and grime. From there, he cleaned the wound with alcohol, when he heard a sharp intake of breath.

"Ouch," He heard Isabella say groggily, her head slowly turning toward her arm. "What are you doing?"

Edward put a finger to his lips, telling her to keep it down. "I'm cleaning your wound," He explained. "And stitching it up."

"Do you know what you're doing?"

Edward scoffed. "My dad is a doctor, I might as well have a license of practice from all the learning I have done."

Isabella only nodded, shutting her eyes as Edward started to sew the wound. He apologized for not giving her something to lessen the pain, but since he was only seventeen he could not get certain medication or drugs. She only bit her lip, which made him feel sorry for her. What had happened to her that made her want to commit suicide? Did she get the black eye and the broken ribs from the run? Did she fall badly in the forest? Edward decided that it wasn't his place to pry, and kept his mouth shut.

Finally, he had stitched up the wound. He finished by wrapping the cut in a gauze, making sure that it would stay. He stared at it, noting that it looked pretty decent. Edward could also tell that Isabella was looking at it with tears in her eyes. Was she crying because she had realized what she had done, and that it was a mistake? Or were her tears caused because she didn't finish the job?

His thoughts were interrupted when she began to get out of his bed.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

"The floor," She said nonchalantly. "This is your bed, you should sleep in it."

Edward shook his head. "No, it's fine. Take it."

"No, really. You've already done enough for me."

"Can you just accept the god damn bed, please? I don't want to argue because one, my parents are asleep. And two, because I just witnessed you committing suicide. So please for my sanity, could you take the fucking bed?"

The Duck watched him with a blank expression before sighing. "At least have your jacket." Edward didn't reply, a bed for a jacket. He could handle that. He watched as she shrugged off the leather jacket – painfully, he noticed – and gave it to him. As he reached for the jacket, he saw that her floral shirt was cut from her waist to her stomach. It was only a sliver, but he could still see how clear her skin was, how it represented ivory. Edward snapped out of his trance and cleared his throat.

Isabella tucked herself into his bed, sighing. "Thank you."

Edward grabbed some linens and an extra pillow from his closet, laying it on the ground. "No problem. I guess I'll see you in the morning …"

He couldn't finished his sentence, because he was interrupted by soft, even breaths.

Isabella had fallen asleep.

**x x x x x x**

"Where were you yesterday?" Rosalie asked as she sat beside him in the cafeteria. "Did you skip again?"

"Uh, yeah. I needed a break, you know?" Edward lied.

Rosalie swatted his arm lightly. "You have to let me know when you're gonna skip. I'll join you – we could totally just chill at your place and watch some movies. Like old times."

"Okay. Sounds good."

"Hey," Rosalie said. "Daisy Duck isn't here today, where do you think she is? She might …"

Edward tuned her out. He knew where Isabella, or Daisy Duck, was – she was at his house, still lying in his bed. He had told her not to come today, because the black eye would cause suspicions, which he knew she did not want. She had agreed, but not before telling him what he had missed in Creative writing. A whole damn novel? God bless him, it was bad enough they were collaboration partners, and now they had to do this? They would do nothing but argue over the littlest things. This morning was an example of that.

He had returned her money after he taped her stomach, making sure that her ribs would heal. Of course, being as stubborn as she was, she declined.

"Take it. I feel bad about what I had said – it was an accident. I know that now," He had told her.

She shook her head. "No. Look, I feel guilty for doing that to your phone, since you worked hard for it. Please take it."

"No. Here."

"No. Keep it."

"Holy shit, take the fucking money!"

She had glared at him. "_No_."

After more bickering, they had agreed to split it. And then he had mentioned that her pain medications were at the clinic. "Shit. Okay, well I'll just get it later, then …"

"You can't. Remember, your black eye?"

Subconsciously, Isabella touched her eye, wincing from the pain. "Oh, right."

"I'll get it. Just … stay here."

"Yes, master."

"Fuck you," He said.

She shook her head. "No, thanks."

He had rolled his eyes, slipping out of the door. He grabbed a piece of toast and drank coffee, all the while the package from the clinic staring at him. Edward hated it; it was almost like it was proving that the monthly checkups were needed, that it was real. He flipped it off, feeling silly for just doing that to an inanimate object, and made breakfast for Isabella. He had given it to her right before he left for school, neither of them saying a word to each other.

"Hello, Edward? Helloooooooo. Are you alive?" Rosalie's hand was waving in front of his eyes.

"Huh?" He asked, disorient. "Oh, yeah. Sorry. I zoned out there."

Rosalie laughed and took a bite of her salad. "Rough night?"

Edward sighed. "You could say that."

* * *

If you're following me on twitter, you might have seen that I was updating this chapter soooooooon. Well, I told you it would be soon right? Haha.

**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

* * *

I am back, and ready to attack!

HA! Jk. That line was shit. But seriously, I am back and am ready to continue updating. It feels good to _finally _put this chapter up. Especially since the last chapter was sort of dramatic. But yeah :)

I had a good time in the Philippines. There wasn't much sun in Manila or Bacolod .. but I got a tan in Boracay haha. I wish I could go back, but I can't. Instead I have to stay here and live with this shitty Canadian weather. Damn.

Back to the story? Yes, please. At first, I wrote chapter 4 in Bella's perspective, but then I thought some people would want to know how Edward (or Douche Master. However you want to call him) found Bella in the woods. Also, there are some things going on in Edward's life that I needed to show, without giving a full explanation. It's all about the suspense haha. That's pretty much all I can say for now. You'll just have to wait for the next chapter ;)

Okay, goodnight my lovely readers. and REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!

Karina.


	5. Chapter Five: Celebration

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

* * *

Chapter Five: Celebration

_**Bella**_

Two hours after Douche Master had left, Bella found herself incredibly bored. No one was in the Cullen household, just her. It was completely silent, and nothing good was on TV. She couldn't cook nor could she clean – it was not her house. Bella couldn't simply do something like make a cake or rearrange the furniture without suspicion. So she was left sitting on a leather couch with the remote in her hands. Douche Master told her to make herself feel at home, but she couldn't. Even as she tried to make herself comfortable on the extremely expensive couch, she only got as far as crossing her legs before she realized that it wasn't going to happen. Even the warm blanket sitting beside her seemed to be off limits. Bella just couldn't just lounge around in his house, knowing that hers was standing next door. It was nerve racking, wondering what was going on inside that house at this moment.

Renee would be doing some new furniture arrangement, no doubt – the house was never the same for more than three weeks. Renee's fickle character made it seem like Bella had just moved into a new home, and before she could get comfortable, it would change again. She wondered if the Cullen's had kept their furniture in the same arrangement for more than three weeks. If it had been the same since this house was built. And as Bella ignored the TV screen, her eyes wandered around her. She was in their living room, and the walls were painted a soft yellow. The couches were a deep brown, and the coffee table, which was in the centre of the room, was mahogany. A cupboard with many, many shelves, held family photos and candles. As well as some books and magazines on lifestyle – clearly there for the aesthetics of it all. Of course, the large, plasma screen, HD TV hung on the wall, proud and new.

However, Bella noticed that besides the presentation, there was some sort of evidence that the family actually _lived _here, and not just existed in a show home. On the coffee table was a centerpiece, though it wasn't vintage nor was it modern and designer. It was homemade, apparently made by Douche Master himself. It was a ceramic model of a teddy bear, painted in different colors. It was small but it was cute. Bella remembered making those in the third grade, however, unlike Douche Master's crafted bear, Bella's looked like someone threw it in mud and left it out to dry. She had gone with the traditional theme of a teddy bear – brown and a red bow. But she chose a dull brown that showed no sign of eyes or muzzle, and the red bow was hardly a bow at all. She had painted it red while the brown paint was still wet. Basically, she created a color that should never have been created. She threw it in the trash, to say the least. The fact that Douche Master's parents appreciated his erratic painting almost melted her heart.

Things such as the blanket beside her shown sentimental value – it was red and soft, and at the corner of the blanket, was the name Esme Platt. Bella guessed that that was Esme's maiden name, and that it was given to her when she was young. And as Bella rose from the couch, painfully, she limped her way throughout the house. The walls, all the same gentle shade of yellow, was the same on every single wall. It seemed to make the house brighter, unlike her house, where all the walls were white, making the house look bland. There were family photos everywhere, some sitting on counters and some hanging on the walls. Bella noticed that the majority of the furniture were all a deep brown, mahogany for wood, and it gave warmth to the house. She enjoyed the kitchen, liked how beautifully made it was. The dining table as well, with its grand table and plentiful chairs. Alongside the wall was a large cupboard that displayed glass plates, plates with paintings, and some china. Moving along, Bella skipped the second floor, since all the bedrooms were located there. She felt by exploring that floor, she would be disrespecting privacy, feeling _too much _at home. So when Bella made it to the third floor, she was overwhelmed. It was one hallway, with two doors. One door led to Dr. Cullen's study, and the other opened to a mystery.

She chose the door with mystery.

Bella gasped - It was so simple, not as extravagant as the rest of the house. The walls were not yellow, but a Maya blue. And the only thing that was in this room was a Grande piano. The window behind it shown the sun's light, it's reflection glinting on the piano's smooth, clean surface. As Bella walked around the piano, her fingers grazing the keys, she could hear her footsteps. The room had acoustics – perfect for a music room. Bella wondered who the piano belonged to as she stared at the many music sheets on the stand. It was all hand written, and it all looked complicated.

But out of the whole house, Bella knew that this was her favorite room. Its simplicity reminded her of her own bedroom – the only place at her home that actually _felt _like home. So as Bella reminisced on the only good times she ever had in that house, she heard the front door slam shut. Her head shot up and her heart skipped a beat. She quickly ran out of the room and peaked down the stairwell. Esme Cullen had shown, and she was making her way up the stairs. Bella ran back inside the piano room and closed the door quietly behind her. She was stuck here until God knew how long.

"Shit," Bella whispered. She could hear Esme humming from the floor beneath her, and even though it sounded beautiful, Bella was horrified. What if Esme found her here? She knew that Esme liked Bella – she didn't know why – but there was doubt that she might accuse Bella of breaking in. Or she might forget assumptions and focus more on Bella's appearance – she had seen herself in the mirror earlier, she looked like she just walked out of a scary movie – and would want answers. Bella couldn't lie to Esme, especially since she was always so kind to her. Esme always sent flowers on Bella's birthday, and even got her Christmas presents, but that didn't mean that she could stop hiding. _No. _Especially not now. It was bad enough Douche Master saw her suicide attempt and took her in; she didn't need anyone else to know.

So she sat on the piano bench, even more bored than she had been earlier. Except now, Bella was in the worst situation possible – getting caught by Esme, Douche Master's _mother. _Damn.

Sighing, Bella lay on the cold, wooden floor and shut her eyes. What else could she do but sleep, and hope that she would be able to sneak out to safety when she awoke.

**x x x x x x**

She was dreaming – she had to be. Bella had already lived this before, had already felt the pain.

Well, it was more emotional pain than physical. Bella was young then, her square framed glasses slipping on the bridge of her nose as she read _Harry Potter_ – though she was secretly disappointed when she didn't receive her letter in the mail regarding her acceptance into Hogwarts. It was her birthday, and she had just turned eleven. However, it was not only Hogwarts that had forgotten Bella's birthday on the thirteenth of September. It was her parents as well – the two people who should have known her birthday without hesitation, were in Hawaii enjoying their getaway. Neither of them left a present or a card. Not even a call awaited her all day.

Bella sighed and closed her book, stretching her arms when she realized that she had been reading for more than an hour. She got off the couch and went to the kitchen, where the birthday cake she had bought herself was placed on the counter. It was her favorite – chocolate cake with vanilla frosting. She opened the box and took it out, putting it on a glass tray that she had bought her mother for Christmas, only to be never used. This would be the first time the tray would be brought out of the box. Bella stuck the candles in the cake, lighting them once she had placed the right amount of candles. The flame glowed, creating a reflection in her glasses.

"Make a wish, Bella," She whispered to herself, just before she shut her eyes and took in a deep breath. With one huge blow, all eleven candles went out, the smell of smoke filling her nose.

As Bella cut herself a piece of her cake, she saw the bouquet of lilies Esme had sent her every year for her birthday. She smiled. At least one person didn't forget. Bella didn't know Mrs. Cullen that well, but she was glad that she was kind enough to send a gift. She began chewing her cake, hoping her wish would come true. She wished for the rest of her birthdays to be happy birthdays, with the people she cared about around her, celebrating another year of life.

But it never happened.

And as the years came, her parents still didn't acknowledge the thirteenth of September as anything special. Only Esme's lilies reminded her that it was her birthday. However, as those years came and left, Bella soon realized something.

She had forgotten her birthday too.

**x x x x x x**

_**Edward**_

Everyone was talking about how Isabella had not been in school today. Though Edward could care less, Rosalie could not stand it. If anything, Rose was probably jealous that everyone was more focused on the Duck's absence than Rose's new jeans. Or some shit like that. He wasn't really paying attention to her during lunch.

Actually, Edward wasn't paying attention to anything all day. He was consumed with his thoughts. Instead of talking all class like he usually did, he was a very social person by nature, and the fact that he had kept quiet brought a lot of people to question. He got annoyed of all of his classmates asking him whether he was okay or not. God. It was like they wanted to put his emotions on the school newspaper or something.

When the last bell rang, Edward was surprised to see Isabella's friend, Alice, step right between him and the door.

"Um," He stammered. "Can I help you?"

Alice put a hand on her hip. "Do you know where Bella is?"

_Yes. _"No," Edward lied. He was known to be good at lying. It wasn't necessarily something to be proud of, but it came in handy sometimes. "Why would I know?"

"Just wondering," She replied, not answering his question. She walked away from Edward, giving him a glare before she pushed through the school doors. Edward stood there, stunned. Did Alice hate him? Probably, since he accused Isabella of breaking his cell phone and embarrassed her.

"Was she bothering you, man?" Emmett asked, bringing Edward out of his reverie. The McCarty family was all Forks had been talking about this summer. They came from California, and the big question was: why the hell would someone want to move to Forks? Emmett said that his family needed a new environment, but Edward doubted it. No one needed _this _much of a change in surroundings. Seriously. From Cali to Forks? There was definitely more behind the story. But Edward didn't push – it wasn't his story to tell. If anything, he understood when people needed their space.

"No. She was just wondering where her friend was," Edward replied.

Emmett rolled his eyes. "Fuck. I already told Alice that hanging around with the Duck would ruin her rep. Not to mention she's a bad influence. I don't want her corrupting my little sister."

"Where did you hear that she was a bad influence?"

"Rose told me."

Edward nodded his head – of course Rose told Emmett that. They were practically dating; she wouldn't want Emmett to be nice to Isabella, especially when his sister was friends with her. Rosalie had finally gotten a senior she didn't think was pathetic, and she'd do anything to make sure that it wouldn't be spoiled. At that thought, Edward almost laughed – Isabella might have been weird and a little fucked in the head, but a bad influence? That was like saying Carlisle was a shitty doctor – not true in the least bit.

"Hey, how are you and Rose anyways?" Edward inquired.

"Good, I guess" Emmett replied indifferently. "I don't know. Most of the time, things are great. Like, _really _great. But then she gets this look in her eye and … I don't fucking know, man. It's like she pulls away. She's hard to read."

Typical Rosalie; playing hard to get. She better not pay _too _hard to get, or else Emmett would stop caring. He had to tell her that later.

"Don't worry about it, Emmett," Edward said calmly, trying to make sure that Rose wouldn't screw things up. Edward liked Emmett; he was good for Rose. "That's just how she is with everyone."

"Really?"

Edward chuckled. "Really. Anyways, I gotta jet. I'll catch you later, yeah?"

"See you, man."

As Emmett retreated to his Jeep, Edward caught the sight of Alice. The tiny girl with short black hair and grey eyes narrowed her eyes at him with her arms crossed. Edward waved to humor himself. She rolled her eyes and muttered something, stepping into her brother's car. Emmett drove by Edward as he walked to his car, waving at him with a slight smile. Edward nodded his head to Emmett, and waved at Alice once more, just to humor himself. He had not done anything fun all day – not with his thoughts drowning him – he had to find something to do, even if it meant annoying Alice. Really, the feud between Isabella and him didn't have anything to do with Alice, he didn't know why she hated him.

But then again, isn't that what happened with Rose? After all, it was Rose that despised Isabella, not Edward. If anything, he didn't really have any business in the matter at all. But he was involved, and he simply did the things he did for his best friend. Maybe he just understood Alice a little better than he thought.

Edward got in his car, turning on the heat the moment he put the key into the ignition. It was considerably dry today, since the rain was almost minimal. But the wind was cold and strong. Edward put the car into drive and backed out of his parking space, smiling at the fact that he would be going home. It was Friday. To be specific - it was going to be a _chill _Friday. There were no parties, and everyone else had something else to do. Finally, a night to himself. Just him, the TV, and Esme's cookies …

_Oh, shit. _He remembered.

Isabella was at his house. He would not have a chill Friday after all, he would have to baby sit the Freak. Whatever, it might not be so bad. Maybe he could get answers out of her. Which reminded him, he needed to make one more stop before heading home.

**x x x x x x**

Convincing Monica that Isabella had sent Edward to obtain her pain meds could be compared to that of an interrogation. Edward soon grew frustrated; he had been up all night because of Isabella. His busy shift at the diner last night did not help either – he probably looked like hell. Monica wasn't stupid. She could see that Edward was over-tired, which was half the reason why she wouldn't give him the damn medicine.

"I thought you said that you and Isabella don't talk much," she argued, pushing her glasses farther on the bridge of her nose.

Edward shrugged nonchalantly. Hiding his impatience. "We're neighbors. She was sick today and her mom asked if I could retrieve them for her."

"Well okay," Monica sighed, finally giving in, pulling the white paper bag from the shelf. "Do you have her payment?"

Edward almost froze. _Almost. _"I'm afraid that Mrs. Swan forgot to give me the payment. I'll go get it and be back in ten minutes …"

"Renee is paying this time? Huh. It's usually Isabella who pays," Monica muttered, almost like she was talking to herself.

Edward furrowed his brows. Why was Isabella the one who paid for her medicine? Shouldn't Mr. or Mrs. Swan have paid for it? Isabella was their daughter, and she was a minor. Isabella's story thickened, and the more Edward got involved, he wanted to know more. Maybe there was more to the girl than her classic novels and suicidal attempts. If Monica didn't know the reason why Isabella paid for her own medicine that probably meant no one else knew about it either. Isabella probably wanted to keep it a secret. If anything, Edward respected secrets – he had some of his own to keep.

"Oh, I forgot!" Edward acted, laughing at himself. "Isabella gave me the money this morning just before I left for school," Edward pulled out his wallet and gave the proper amount of cash, handing it to Monica. "Thanks so much, Monica. I'll see you around."

Monica collected the money and smiled at Edward. He was glad that the woman loved him like a son, it made it slightly easier to escape. "Good-bye, Edward."

Edward let out a sigh of relief as he stepped into his car. He had to lie so many times today, if only he knew _what _he was lying about, maybe this situation would be easier.

What had he gotten himself into? He shouldn't have followed Isabella, should have given her the money in the morning rather than last night. But, what if he didn't stop her? She could have been dead, could have been lost somewhere in the woods. He wouldn't have been able to give the money in the morning – she would be gone. As much as he wished that he should have just gone inside his house and left Isabella be, he knew that what he did was right. Edward saved someone's life … he just wanted to know what Isabella was hiding.

As he rounded the corner to his house, Edward could feel his heartbeat quicken. He wondered what Isabella was doing, what she did all day. Edward said she could do whatever, since Esme would be late today – it was Friday, that meant Esme went to Port Angeles to have coffee with some old friends. But when Edward parked in the driveway, he froze. Esme's car was parked beside him. _Fuck. _Isabella was in there. Did she get caught? Edward quickly shut off his car and ran towards the front door, panting as the smell of brownies encased him. His eyes quickly scanned the room, looking to see if Esme would be standing with her arms crossed, with the look on her face the same as every time she punished him.

But when Edward found his mother, she was in the kitchen, taking her famous brownies out of the oven. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.

"Hey, Mom," Edward said nervously. He would never admit it to anyone, but he was scared of his mother.

Esme glanced up from the brownies, grinning kindly. "Hi, honey. How was your day?"

"Okay," He said, tapping the counter with his fingers. "So …"

"_So_ … what?"

_Okay. She doesn't know about Isabella._

"Never mind," Edward replied, smiling slightly. His ass was saved! "I'm going to go to my room."

"Okay, honey," Esme said, her brow creased as she put the brownies into a Tupperware, sealing it was a bow.

"Who's that for?" Edward asked.

"Huh?" Esme said, shaking her head of her focus. "Oh, it's for Isabella Swan. It's her birthday today. You know how I always get her flowers for her birthday. Well, I thought it would be nice if I made her some brownies too."

For a little while, Edward stood amazed. It was Isabella's birthday today? Why hadn't she mentioned it? Girls usually told everyone that it was their special day. They usually told Edward so that he could greet them with a hug. But then Edward remembered – something was strange about Isabella. She wasn't like every other girl. And if she were to ever mention it was her birthday, she certainly wouldn't have told Edward.

Esme picked up the brownies and the bouquet of flowers and began walking towards the door. "I'll just drop this off at the Swan's house …"

"_No!_" Edward yelled, shocking Esme. "I mean … I'll take them. I have to talk to Isabella about our creative writing assignment anyways."

_Another lie. It never ends._

"Well, that's very thoughtful of you, Edward," Esme commented, handing him the brownies and the flowers.

Edward nodded, and waited until Esme had begun cleaning the kitchen. He went to the front door, opened it, and slammed it shut. Making sure that Esme was nowhere to be seen, he quietly went up the stairs. God, why was he doing this? A better question, why was he doing all of this for _her_? He could have simply dropped her off at Alice's, but no. He just had to be the gentleman his parents raised him to be and offered his house. Biggest fucking mistake ever.

Just as he touched the doorknob to his bedroom, he heard the floor creak. Edward cursed, thinking that Esme had caught him. However, it was not Esme he saw bounding up the stairs, it was Isabella. Actually, she was going _down _the stairs, back to the second floor. What had she been doing on the third story?

"What were you doing up there?" Edward whispered.

She shrugged. "I got bored and went exploring. I got stuck inside that piano room when your mom came in."

_So that was why Esme never found Isabella. _

"Well, get down here quickly!"

"What do you think I'm doing? Having a picnic on your staircase?"

"You might as well be, at the pace you're going," Edward scolded. He could hear Esme cleaning dishes downstairs. "Jesus, my mom thinks I'm out. So hurry your ass up."

Bella quietly scoffed. "I'm going as fast as I can. It hurts."

Oh, right. He had forgotten that he found Isabella beaten in the woods. Edward sighed and put down the gifts, running towards her. Edward put his hand around her waist, taking her arm to put around his shoulder. They went quickly, more quickly than she had been doing before. But when they went too fast, Edward could hear Isabella take a sharp intake of breath. She didn't say anything or complain, but he knew that meant she was in pain.

Finally, they made it to the bottom of the stairs. And when they reached Edward's bedroom, he let her go in first before retrieving Esme's gifts again. Edward looked from left to right, making sure that Esme was still downstairs. The sound of pans clanking together proved him right. He shut the door quietly and breathed a sigh of relief.

"I'm sorry," He heard Isabella say then. "I should have just stayed in here."

Edward wiped his brow. "You should have – but it was a good thing you went exploring. Esme never checks into the music room."

"Why?"

"Because it's mine, and she knows that I don't handle guests very well."

Isabella scratched her head. "I'm sorry, I didn't know …"

"Don't worry about it," Edward shrugged, giving her the lilies and the brownies. "They're from Esme."

She took them from him, smelling the bouquet. She smiled – Edward mentally froze, he had never seen Isabella smile before – and said, "Oh yeah, it's my birthday. Tell Esme that I say thank you, will you?"

"Um, okay" Edward said. The way she said it was her birthday, it was like she had forgotten. Did she not know when her birthday was, or was she simply saying it like that because she didn't think it was a big deal. Edward stuffed his hands in his pockets, feeling the white paper bag he had gotten earlier. He threw them on the bed, next to Isabella. "I got your meds. You should take them to, you know, lessen the pain."

_Wow, smart statement._

Surprisingly, she laughed. "Thanks. I never would have guessed that that was what pain medication was for." She opened the bag, revealing the bottle. Before Edward could ask if she wanted a glass of water, Isabella opened the bottle and took the needed dosage dry.

Edward sat down on his new bed, the floor. "So Monica was asking me about the payment …"

"Oh, shit," Isabella muttered. "Did you pay for this? I'm sorry, I forgot about that. I'll pay you back, I promise."

"Don't. I used the money you gave me to pay for it. Even though we split it, it was still enough. So technically, you still paid for it." That seemed to calm her down. "Anyways," Edward continued. "We were talking, and she mentioned how you were the one who usually paid for the meds. Is that true?"

Isabella looked away. "Maybe."

"But you're a minor, don't you need your parents' consent or something?"

She shrugged. "I forged their signatures."

"Okay. But why wouldn't they just pay for the medicine themselves? I mean – "

"Because they don't know about the medication, okay?" Isabella snapped.

Realizing that Isabella didn't want to go further into this subject, Edward backed off. He pulled out his homework and let the Freak be. However, even with the room completely silent and his determination to focus on his Biology textbook, he couldn't help but wonder what Isabella was hiding, because now she was not only hiding it from him, but from her parents as well. If he didn't know, and her parents didn't know, _no one_ knew. What was Isabella scared of?

**x x x x x x**

_**Bella**_

They were eating dinner.

Bella could hear the light chatter and easy laughing above the Cullen's dining room. Her stomach grumbled. Douche Master said that he would bring her food, but who knew how long it would take? His damn family were talking and talking – they might as well have a part on _The View._

She compared the Cullen's dinner conversations to that of the Swan's. Where at her house, dinner would be eerily quiet, the Cullen's talked of different things – school, work, events. During dinner with her family, Phil made sure things were proper. Backs straight and all that shit. From where she was sitting, which was on Douche Master's bed, what she heard sprung her imagination of an all American meal. It seemed easier to eat here, like no one was insecure about what was going into their bodies. If Bella ate more than one serving, Phil would have knocked down her self-esteem with a comment about her weight.

Holy damn, she was hungry. Besides the piece of toast and small batch of brownies, Bella hadn't consumed anything all day. But she couldn't complain, Douche Master had helped her as best as he could – which, she thought, was probably very hard for him. He was cold and heartless; this caring thing must have been new for him.

Bella wished she could change and take a shower. She was wearing yesterday's clothes, which was stained with dirt and blood. She smelled awful, and her skin felt heavy – full of sweat from last night. The only clean thing she had on was Douche Master's jacket. She had put it on after he left for dinner. She didn't think he would mind. But that didn't explain why the hell she was still wearing it. Bella shrugged it off. About five minutes later, she felt cold, felt more exposed. Almost like the world could see her insecurities and fears. She hastily put the jacket back on and crossed arms. Why did his jacket feel so … safe?

Bella rolled her eyes and pulled her hair to one side – she always over analyzed things. She wished she could just switch it off. Switch off the sense of thinking and feeling; become completely numb. But she couldn't – not with the pain of realizing that Phil wasn't her biological father. Her whole life, she thought that the man hurting her was dad. She had come to terms with it. But now this? She couldn't deal with the anxiety. Bella wondered who this Charles Garland was, and why Renee didn't want Bella to meet him. Thinking of Renee brought anger to Bella. Why had Renee let Phil abuse Bella to such an extent to let her _believe _that Phil was family. Everything she knew was in question.

The door swung open, and Bella jumped. She relaxed when she realized it was only Douche Master. He was holding a plate of food in his hand and a glass of water.

"Sorry," Douche Master whispered before closing his door. "I didn't mean to scare you."

Bella shook her head. "It's okay. Thank you for the food."

"Um. No problem."

She ate in silence, and Douche Master was watching _The Buried Life. _Bella took her time eating, savoring the meal. This was one of the few times where Bella could eat dinner and just _think, _and not be scared. She only wished her thoughts this time would be pleasant. Instead, they were full of concern. Douche Master knew that Bella paid for her pain medications, and she could tell he wanted answers. Bella didn't let her parents know about the medicine – she was already scared to talk to them, so asking them to pay for the medicine to lessen the pain Phil constantly caused would be like going to hell and back. So she forged their signatures, letting them believe she was perfectly fine. Fooling the world into believing that the Swan family was normal. And even though Douche Master had done so much for her for no reason, she couldn't give him answers. Not to someone who bullied her for the majority of her high school career.

She needed to forget about this shit.

"Hey, Dou – I mean, Edward. Do you think I could take a shower?" Bella asked when the TV went to commercial.

"Yeah, sure. My parents should be asleep by now." Bella slowly got out of bed, making sure she didn't do something to hurt her broken body. "I'll leave some clothes out for you."

"Uh, I don't think your clothes will fit me," Bella stated, feeling a little uncomfortable at the thought of sharing clothes with Douche Master.

"Obviously. I can get you clothes from your room."

"But how …"

Douche Master shrugged. "Easy. I'll just sneak in through your bedroom window, grab some clothes, and come back."

Bella suddenly feared his plan. What if he got caught? The thought of what Phil would do to him … it was bad enough to do those things to her but to other people? Fuck that. "It's fine. I'll just wear these clothes."

"Isabella," There he went again, saying her name like it was a melody. She had to get used to that. "The clothes you're wearing are ripped and stained. And I'm sure that sleeping in jeans isn't comfortable."

Bella looked down at her attire. The jeans she was wearing – her favorite jeans – were horribly ruined. She sighed, knowing that Douche Master was right. She hated admitting she was wrong, especially when it came to Douche Master. "Okay, fine. But do you know what to get? I mean, you're a guy, after all."

He rolled his eyes. "I can manage. My best friend is a girl, remember?"

"Ah." Bella definitely remembered. Who could forget the horrible twins?

He stood and pulled on a hoodie. "Go and take a shower. By the time you're done, there'll be clothes outside the door for you, okay?"

Bella hesitated, but she nodded. She watched as he swiftly walked through his window, and climbed down the tree. She was still watching as he took the ladder outside her bedroom window and positioned it for an easy entry and escape. It wasn't until Bella saw that Douche Master was inside did she decide to take her shower.

Bella made sure Douche Master's parents really were asleep before she ran into the bathroom. His bathroom. She turned on the water and stripped of her clothes. When she stepped into the shower, all she could think was, _finally. _Unfortunately, since this was Douche Master's bathroom, that meant there were only men's products here. Bella had no choice but to wash up with his stuff. Hopefully he wouldn't mind. As she rinsed, she had to admit that his shit smelled pretty damn good. Bella didn't know if it was the product itself, or if it was the fact that Bella smelled _clean._

It was a quick shower. Mainly because Bella was scared that Douche Master wouldn't return. If that fucker didn't show up, then that meant shit had gone down. She dried up quickly, wrapping a towel around her body. She caught sight of her wrist, shivering at the stitches. What if she had gone through with that plan? At the time, death seemed like the perfect escape. But now, it just seemed stupid.

Bella opened the bathroom door slightly, and sure enough, a pile of her clothes was folded on the ground. She picked it up and shut the door again. Douche Master had gotten her pajamas. That was fine – Bella was perfectly content with staying in pj's for a while. He had gotten her favorite ones, too. The deep blue one made of silk. He also got her undergarments. She was slightly embarrassed that he had gone through that drawer, but she knew it was necessary. Bella was thankful he had gotten her a bra. She usually didn't wear one to bed, but she wasn't going to do that in the presence of Douche Master. He was right, he _did _know what to get.

Bella left the bathroom and made it back to Douche Master's room without consequence. Sitting on the bed was her duffle bag. What the hell?

"I got you a whole bunch of clothes. It's easier than going every single night to get you your things," Douche Master said.

"Wow. Thank you."

"No problem."

Bella looked through the duffle – it had plenty of jeans and shirts. As well as sweats and undergarments. He even got her toiletries and makeup. The clothes alone could last her a week, and the fact that he had gotten her beauty supplies was incredible. Was he implying that she could stay here for this long? But why? She put the duffle on the ground and stared at Douche Master.

"Why are you so nice to me all of a sudden?"

Douche Master looked up from the TV and shrugged. "Well, I feel bad …"

"Don't. I don't need your pity," Bella spat. "Besides, I thought you hated me."

He ignored that statement. "Then because it's your birthday."

Douche Master then pulled out one of the brownies Esme had made her. There was a candle, too. He lit it as he got closer to Bella. "Make a wish."

"Seriously?"

"Do I look like I'm joking?"

Bella looked at him, and his face was solemn. So she took a deep breath and blew, wishing for the same thing she always did. When she opened her eyes, she took the brownie from Douche Master and smiled at him slightly. "Thank you. This is the first 'cake' someone has gotten for me. I'm usually the one who buys my own cake. No one, but your mom, makes an effort on my birthday. Even I sometimes let the day slip my mind."

Douche Master cocked his head to the side. "Why are you telling me this?"

Bella considered his question. It was Douche Master after all, _the _General Douche Master. She hated him with all of her heart. So why _did _she tell him?

"I don't know," Bella replied, answering her own question. "I guess I just felt like it."

* * *

**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

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**Who else is impressed that I updated this story in one week?**

**Anyways, so now we see that Edward has a soft side. But we also see why Emmett isn't a fan of Bella. And most importantly ... Bella got a shower. Hurray for personal hygiene! **

**Some of you asked if I was going to write this story in anyone else's POV beside Bella and Edward. The answer is, no. I'm mainly focused on these two characters (and not just because it's their story), because of their complexity and how they really do influence each other's lives. But if I ever do decide to write in a different POV, I'll be sure to let you know through my twitter. And since we're talking about twitter, I'm making a trailer for Bottled Lies. It's in progress right now, but i'll send a link when I put it up via twitter. So follow me for updates :)**

**I just found out Katy Perry is coming to my city - exciting! Unfortunately, I have to wait till February 26 to buy tickets (though I asked my parents to get me some for my 16th birthday). But I know in other cities it's already gone on sale. Has anyone gotten tickets? If you have, I'm extremely jealous!**

**That's it! I'll see you guys in the next update!**

**REVIEW, pleeaaaase :)**

**Karina.**


	6. Chapter Six: Admiration

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. But I do own a bruise on my knee ... yum :)

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Chapter Six: Admiration

_**Bella**_

Bella woke up in confusion.

Her tired eyes adjusted to the bright morning light, and her aching body stirred from the uncomfortable position she had slept in. The room smelled of smoke and homemade chocolate. She knew where the smoky scent had come from – the candle from Douche Master's brownie/birthday cake. The memory was still fresh, and it made her feel light. The first birthday cake she had ever had that was actually _given _to her . . . and it was a damn brownie. But even if it was a brownie, it was nice to be given something for once. Douche Master could have given her the fucking grass from his garden for her birthday and she would have been touched. But she wasn't _just _touched, she was surprised, shocked even, that Douche Master had made a little effort for her seventeenth birthday. Last night, Bella swore she saw something changed in his demeanor, like his heart wasn't completely made of cold stone.

However, a brownie with a candle on it wouldn't change the things he had done to her, the things he had said to her prior to this fucked up situation. And it certainly wouldn't change the fact that Douche Master was … well, a douche.

But still. Something had changed last night, and Bella was having a hard time figuring out what exactly was no longer constant.

"What are you thinking about?" A hushed voice asked.

Bella didn't have to look to see who was asking, because it was obvious. But she did anyways, and when she did, she realized why the room smelled of warm chocolate. "Chocolate chip pancakes?"

He shrugged. "Do you not like chocolate chip pancakes?"

"No," Bella shook her head at his assumption. "They're my favorite."

"Oh, mine, too," replied Douche Master,

She pursed her lips. "Cool."

_Awkward_.

Douche Master cleared his throat and gave her the plate of pancakes. "Eat up. Wouldn't want them to go to waste, especially since I made them."

"You can cook?" Bella asked, shocked.

Douche Master chuckled. "I'm not an idiot. Esme showed me how to cook ever since I learned how to walk."

_Not an idiot? Could have fooled me, _Bella thought.

But instead of saying those words, she nodded in thanks and began eating. To her surprise, the chocolate chip pancakes were actually good, delicious even. But all through out middle school, during cooking class, Douche Master did everything _but _cook. She remembered rolling her eyes whenever he and that new kid Tyler started fighting with kitchen utensils. She scowled when the bitch Rosalie laughed at their silliness, and ignored the way Tyler always looked at her. It freaked her out, especially since she had never talked to the imbecile before in her life. But still, the fact that Douche Master _knew _how to cook was beyond Bella. Who the fuck knew that there was actually some sort of matter inside that head of his, besides his ego?

Douche Master wiped his face, and Bella noticed the smear on his cheek. "Hey, are you bleeding?"

"Huh?"

She motioned to him. "You rubbed your face and now there's blood on your cheek."

He looked at his fingertip and shrugged. "Cooking accident," Douche Master said, wiping his face.

"You cut yourself while making pancakes?"

"I said I could cook, I didn't say I was graceful in the kitchen."

_Yup. He was an idiot._

By the time Bella had finished her pancakes, she heard a light _ring _coming from not too far away from her. Bella creased her brow – it sounded just like the sound she got whenever she received a text message.

"Aren't you going to answer that?" Douche Master questioned as he threw a football in the air.

Bella stared at him with confusion. "Is that my phone?"

He nodded. "It's not mine – that's for sure," Bella blushed, knowing he meant that it wasn't his phone because he currently didn't have one. Oops. "I grabbed it in your room last night when I was getting your things. It should be in the side pocket of your duffle."

She got up from the bed and walked to where she left her duffle bag. She bent down, and unzipped the side pocket. Sure enough, there was her BlackBerry, the red light blinking. Bella opened the screen to see that it was from Alice. Uh oh, did she want to know what was happening with her? And if so, how would she reply? Maybe she should just ignore it …

No. Alice deserved _at least _a reply. Not the whole truth, but the half truth. Or possibly a quarter truth.

_Wakey, wakey, Bellarina! Today is shopping day and we are going to have tons of fun. I'll pick you up at your place at around 11:30? (I found your address in the phonebook – don't think that I followed you home. That would be fucked up), I have a surprise for you!_

Oh … shit. She forgot about the plans she and Alice had made that day in French class. She couldn't just bail now, Alice seemed like she was so excited. Plus, she still had a lot of money on her bank card. If Renee and Phil weren't concerned with where Bella was – not even after a couple of days – then they probably wouldn't mind if she used the money they earned. Hell, until they gave her answers about Charles, then she wasn't going to care about them.

Then, Bella looked at the text again. It was sent at 9:30 in the morning. Bella glanced at the time on her phone to see how much time she had. Surely it couldn't –

"Shit!" Bella yelled. She dug through her bag and grabbed a pair of jeans and a shirt. "Fuck my life. Shit. Shit. _Shit_." She stood up and ripped her pants off and pulled on the dark washed skinny jeans.

"Whoa!" She heard Douche Master yell. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Changing," Bella said nonchalantly, trying to keep her cool.

"In front of me?"

"Oh, please. I'm pretty you're used to girls getting naked in front of you before." Bella heard him clear his throat uncomfortably when she peeled her top off. She was thankful that she wore a bra last night. She then slipped on the relaxed ¾ sleeve top. It was one of her favorites – loose and comfy, but stylish because of the beading on the neckline and the off-the-shoulder design. Renee had gotten it for her a while back. "I completely forgot Alice and I made plans. She'll be at my house in five minutes."

Douche Master scratched his head. "Why didn't you just cancel?"

Bella looked in the mirror in his room, applying a little foundation to hide her eye, and put on some eyeliner and mascara. She needed to hide that stupid injury as best as she could. "Because I would feel bad. And she would get curious."

"Oh, I see," He replied dumbly. From the mirror, she could see him walk to the window. "No one is in your driveway, not even your parents' cars. She might be a little late."

"Let's hope," Bella said, now slipping on her sneakers. "Are your parents home?"

"No. They left early for some convention. You can leave through the front door without consequence."

"Awesome. I'll catch you later."

"Wait!" He said, just as she touched the doorknob. "It's a little cold out, are you going to be okay in just that?"

"I'll have to be. I don't have a jacket with me. And I don't really want to go in my house – just because both their cars are gone, doesn't necessarily mean that they are too. For all I know, one of them could have their car in the shop."

She watched as Douche Master jogged to his bed, grabbing the leather jacket she had grown fond of. Looking at him now with his jacket, she felt silly for not wanting to let go of it. It wasn't hers, and she knew that it belonged to the boy she hated most. She didn't know why she still wore it at night.

"Wear this," Douche Master said as he handed her the jacket.

"No way," Bella replied. "Alice will wonder why I'm wearing a guy's jacket."

"C'mon, duckling, it's cold out."

Bella put her hand on her hip. "Let me guess, you're trying to be neighborly right?"

"Jesus Christ, if you're not going to take the jacket, then don't blame me when my parents find out you're living in my room because of the sneezing and the coughing."

"My immune system can handle September weather, thank you very much."

Douche Master stared at her, and it was then that she realized that she was glaring at him. Oh. Her face softened when he went to his closet and pulled out a gray zip up hoodie. He gave it to her. "Take this then, it's less suspicious."

Bella glanced at the hoodie, and then at Douche Master. She sighed. "Fine," She put her arms through the sleeves, even though it went past her hands. The material was soft and warm. "Better now?"

"Almost," He said, his voice quiet, like he was thinking. He then stepped closer to her, and Bella stopped breathing. He touched her hair, parting it on one side so that her bangs were covering her eye. Bella's long hair fell just to her elbows, the waves a little messy. She couldn't move – he was too close. Douche Master was so close that she could smell the autumn scent. It wasn't until he stepped back and said, "Better," did she begin breathing again.

Bella then ran out the door. She was halfway down the hallway when she ran back. She poked her head through the door, seeing Douche Master toss the football into the air again. When he sensed her, he looked at her.

"Um, I just wanted to say thank you. You know, for everything," She mumbled.

"It's no problem. And Isabella?"

"Yeah?"

"Have fun," He said confidently, softly. His expression held no scowl, no malice or hate. It was accepting and kind. And it was then that Bella felt flushed. She left, running as fast as she could so that Alice wouldn't be waiting long. And as she ran across the Cullen's garden towards hers, she mentally slapped herself in the face. What the hell was going on with her? Douche Master was an asshole; she shouldn't be getting _flushed. _It was wrong, and it couldn't happen.

Bella went over numerous of reasons why thinking that Douche Master had another side to him was impossible. Even when Alice arrived with her car and new license, she went over this list of impossibilities. It wasn't until they left the borders of Forks' and drove closer to Port Angeles did Bella come to a conclusion: Something _definitely _changed last night, and this morning was evidence. Only, she didn't know if it was a good thing, or if this change would lead to something really, really ugly.

**x x x x x x**

"Where do you think we should start?" Alice asked Bella as they stepped through the doors of the mall.

Bella shrugged. Shopping wasn't really her thing, and she only had her cell phone and a credit card in her pocket. Separate pockets of course. "You choose – it's your first time in this mall."

"Hmm," Alice contemplated, her eyes wondering from side to side, up and down. "_Charlotte Russe_, then? It's been a while."

"Sure. And then we can get something to eat, you know, if you're hungry."

"Holy fuck; yes, please. I swear, Bella. I think we're long lost twins or some shit."

Bella laughed for the first time in a long time. "You really know how to use those words of yours, Alice."

"Eh. No big deal," Alice replied nonchalantly, though Bella could tell she was stifling her laugh with a smile.

They entered _Charlotte Russe_ and then Alice said that her goal for the day was to find a pair black jeans, a few sweaters, and a coat for the weather. Bella felt like saying, _is that all, _but knew that her sarcasm was seriously lacking, and that Alice would make note of it. So as they searched through the racks, Bella picked a few things that she liked. She might as well, since this _was _a shopping trip. And fuck, if Bella didn't get some new clothes, then Douche Master would have to sneak back into her room. She was still scared that he would get caught, and ultimately, so would she.

In her hands were a pair of distressed jeans, a tank with embellished beading on the top, a printed tiered top, and a ruffle trim cover up. She turned to Alice, who was looking at herself in the mirror, observing if the jeweled top corset looked good. It was a little too sexy for Bella's taste, but then Alice put a cardigan over top and made it look more professional. Deciding she was done, Bella walked over to the dressing rooms as well. The girl who worked there took Bella's four items and put them in a dressing room, coincidentally next to Alice's.

"How did you do?" Bella asked when the girl left to greet another customer.

Alice came out, her hands full of items. "I'd say I did pretty well."

Bella scoffed. "I agree," Bella looked back the clothes hanging on the hook and then towards Alice. "I'll just try on my things and then we can go eat, okay?"

"No rush. I'll wait for you here."

Before Bella could nod, she saw Lauren being led to one of the dressing rooms. She remembered how Lauren was nice and sympathetic for one minute, and then rude when Rosalie showed up. She was a hypocritical bitch and Bella hoped she tripped on those high heels of hers and broke her glasses. Lauren looked back at Bella and sweetly smiled at her. Bella returned that smile with an emotionless expression before turning back to Alice.

"Oh my God, you have to try this on, Bella," Alice handed her a ballerina chiffon top with a seamed satin bust and a flowy contrast. It reminded her of something she would wear to a beach party, though she wouldn't know. She had never been to a beach party. "It would look great on you."

"Are you sure? I mean, it looks a little too pretty for me," Bella said, blushing in embarrassment.

"That is the stupidest that I have ever heard," Alice scolded. "You're pretty, Bella. And therefore, you can wear a pretty top. Now try this sucker on and show me!"

Bella rolled her eyes, both at the comment of her being pretty and for the sake of rolling her eyes. But Bella agreed to do it, just to humor Alice. She stepped inside the small room and took off Douche Master's hoodie. Her arms felt cold the minute it was off, but she told herself that it was because it was cold in the store. She took of her shirt and replaced it with the top Alice had given her. The chiffon felt soft against her skin. She took a deep breath before stepping out of the dressing room, revealing the look to Alice.

"How does it look?" Bella asked. She spun around once and waited for Alice's response. "It's too pretty right?"

Alice shook her head. "No fucking way, girl. You look amazing in it. Take a look."

She stood up from her seat spun Bella around by the shoulders so that she was facing the mirror. "See?"

Bella had to blink a couple of times before she realized it was actually her standing in the mirror. The seamed bust shined silver, and the bottom fluttered to the tops of her hips, making her legs look long. It gave her a nice figure, which she never knew she had. She knew her body wasn't bad, just average. This top changed that. Renee had never gotten Bella anything like this, and Bella wondered if it was because Renee had thought that it would have been too pretty for her daughter. She didn't know but now she wanted to slap Renee for depriving her of this for seventeen years.

It was simple, and it was clean. Bella was glad Alice had picked it.

"Ew," A voice said from behind them. Bella turned around and saw Rosalie, and her sidekick Lauren. "The shirt is wearing you, Daisy Duck. It should be the other way around."

"Oh fuck off, Rosalie," Alice said.

"Was I talking to you?"

Alice was about to retort, but Bella interrupted. "Can you leave, please? I haven't done anything to you."

The Bitch stared at Bella for what felt like minutes. She knew Rosalie was watching her, judging her mentally. Rosalie finally put on that sickly sweet smile of hers and hung her shopping bag on her elbow. "I was just trying to help, Daisy. No need to get emotional. Alice, honey, can you tell your brother I'm looking forward to Friday?"

"No," Alice replied.

Rosalie shrugged. And with that, she and Lauren left. Bella hoped that they wouldn't run into them again, and began to walk back to the dressing room to take off the top.

"Hey, don't listen to that bitch," Alice whispered, stopping Bella from taking it off. "She's just mad because she tried on that shirt and it looked like shit. She was probably only saying those things because it looks amazing on you."

"Do you think so?" Bella asked, her eyes on the floor.

"I'm your friend. And I _never _lie to my friends. Ever," Alice told Bella surely. She them smiled and pushed Bella into the dressing room. "Now go try on the of your things – I'm starving."

**x x x x x x**

Bella and Alice decided that they didn't want to eat at the food court. Though Bella knew she didn't want to go because she saw Rosalie and Lauren, Alice had claimed that she wasn't in the mood for greasy, shitty, cafeteria fast food. So they decided to eat Japanese at one of the restaurants inside the mall. Bella had never had sushi before in her life, and this restaurant was known for their fresh sushi. But Alice swore that Bella would like it. And at this point, Bella felt like out of anybody, Alice was the one she could trust. It was hard to believe it but after the whole shirt scene at _Charlotte Russe, _she had a feeling that Alice had the best, and only the best, intentions.

But there was something she was hiding, and Bella could tell. Of course she could, since she was hiding something as well.

It was weird though – Bella felt that maybe she could help Alice. Of course she tended to put people before her, but that was just in her nature. She actually _wanted_ to help Alice, if she needed any, because she was her … friend. God. It was still awkward to say it. Or at least awkward in her head. But when she thought about how much Alice had helped her since she arrived, Bella concluded that she probably would have been dead, had Douche Master not mentioned Alice. If anything, Bella owed her fucking life to the girl.

Her thoughts were interrupted when the waiter came with their menus. Bella looked questionably at the menu, not really knowing what anything was. She felt pitiful since she didn't know what to have in a Japanese restaurant. She had only ever had sushi once, and needless to say, it was horribly made. Plus, Phil wasn't the biggest fan of raw fish, so the family never really made an effort to go to the Japanese restaurant in town. But the Swan family wasn't really a family, was it? No. A family was supposed to be honest with each other, people who could be trusted and not questioned whether or not they were loved. Well, Renee and Phil had lied to her, and deprived her of so many things. They never cared about her feelings or what went on in school.

But that was okay. She had learned to live alone. Had grown up all too fast just so that she knew how to carry herself. Bella only wished Renee had given her advice on boys and whatever the hell mothers talked about with their daughters. She also wished she knew Charles Garland. It was all confusing and fucked up, and she still had many things to think about.

"Can't decide, huh?" She heard Alice ask.

Bella laughed, welcoming herself back to reality. "Not really. I've never eaten at a Japanese Restaurant."

"Legit?" Bella nodded. "Well then, this is my treat."

"Hell, no."

"Why not?"

"Because I would feel completely guilty if you paid for this meal. So, we'll split it."

Alice drummed her fingertips on the surface of the table. "Then how about a compromise? I pay for this, and then you pay for coffee and dessert?"

Bella thought about it. If they went to the café down the road from the mall, the price would be close to being the same as it was here. It _would _be fair. "Sure. So what will we have? Since you seem to know a thing or two about Japanese and their cuisine."

**x x x x x x**

Bella had to constantly remind herself to have some sushi when she went back to Forks, only because she knew she would forget later on. At first, she didn't think she would like raw fish. But now, after having most of the food on the plate, Bella could proudly say that she was a fan of Japanese food … especially the sushi. Alice thought it was humorous how Bella kept on talking about it. But like she mentioned earlier, if she didn't keep on repeating her new found love, she would forget later on. Fuck forgetfulness.

For the rest of their shopping trip, Bella and Alice had gone to most of the stores in the mall. And in that time, Alice had achieved her goals of finding her latest needs in fashion. Bella, surprisingly, got a lot more than she thought she would. Holy Jesus, Bella never thought that she would ever shop that much, and _enjoy _it. Maybe she didn't like shopping with Renee because of all the negativity she had around her. If Bella liked something, and her mother didn't, then it would be unjustly criticized. They never got much because Bella would get so frustrated with herself, thinking that she wasn't good enough for the clothes she had tried on. But with Alice, it was different. She was positive and honest, and tried on silly things just for the sake of having fun.

When they went to the last store, _Forever 21_, Bella and Alice had run into Rosalie and Lauren again. Of course, Alice didn't acknowledge them. But Bella couldn't help it, especially when all four of them were in the accessories area. She could feel the two blondes staring at her, glaring at her. Whispering mean things about her to each other. It would be better if they said it to her face, but Bella was scared of what they might say. She hated being scared, especially by two people who were friends with Douche Master. She almost felt pathetic.

But luckily, Alice and Bella left soon after that, grabbing their purchases and slinging it on their arm. Both of them knew that that was it for shopping day. The goal was achieved and a lot of money was spent. Now it was time for coffee and dessert, which Bella would be happily paying for.

After dropping their shopping bags off in Alice's Mercedes, the two walked to the café. It was only a five minute walk, and Bella felt she needed to put in some exercise before she ate delicious cake. On the way there, Alice kept on making Bella laugh with her impressions of Rosalie and Douche Master. It was pretty accurate, and having spent more time than needed with Douche Master, Bella could help but laugh so hard to the point where tears were forming in her eyes and her laugh was silent.

"What can I get you two?" The young waiter asked once Bella and Alice were comfortably sitting in a booth.

"A coffee and a cheesecake, please?" Alice said.

The waiter, who had chestnut hair that hovered his eyelashes and violet eyes that seemed to shine, wrote down Alice's order before turning to Bella. He gave her a genuine smile before asking, "And you?"

Bella felt self conscious under his gaze, especially since he was so cute. She managed to find her voice and say, "A coffee and a red velvet cake, for me."

"Sounds good," He wrote it down. He collected their menus. "You're order should come soon … I'm sorry, what's your name?"

"Um, Bella."

He grinned, showing a perfect smile. "Your orders will be here in a couple of minutes, Bella."

She couldn't speak or reply, because before she knew it, he was walking back to the kitchen. Bella bit her bottom lip and blushed more than she wanted to. But the heat in her cheeks was unavoidable, especially since she was so pale.

"Holy. Shit," She heard Alice gasp. "He was totally into you!"

Bella looked up. "Huh?"

"Are you blind? He gave you a special smile. And the way he asked for your name … God. It was so obvious."

"I'm pretty sure he does that to every girl in this café."

"He didn't ask for my name," Alice stated. "Which means that he doesn't ask for every girl's name. Bitch, you should be happy. He's hot!"

Bella looked to the side, where the cute waiter was now serving an older couple. "I don't know," she murmured. "He's too good looking to like me."

Alice sighed. "Really? This shit again? Bella, believe me when I tell you that you are not ugly. You are an attractive young lady who just happens to be single. Not to mention your hair looks great. Keep it like that."

_Well, the main purpose of this hairstyle was to hide my black eye. But if it looks good, then what hell._

"But still …"

"I don't want to hear it. When he gives you his number, accept it."

"How do you know he's going to give me his number?"

Alice winked. "Just a hunch."

"Fuck. I hate when I don't know what the hell is going on," Bella groaned.

"Just trust me."

Bella sighed and shook her head. Alice was wrong – there was no way in hell that boy thought Bella was pretty. Alice was being a good friend, but she knew she wasn't attractive enough for a boy like that. It wasn't in the cards.

A few minutes later, the waiter brought their orders. He winked at her as he set the plate of red velvet cake. Bella gave a small smile and a thank you, just before he left. Alice started squealing, but Bella kept her cool. He was trying to get tips, or some shit. The cake was scrumptious, moist and tasty. She had a bite of Alice's cheesecake, which was rich and creamy. The coffee was divine, as well. They should come to this place more often.

Once she finished her cake, Bella felt full. Maybe a little too full. She knew that she wouldn't be able to eat dinner. Which was good. She felt bad that she was secretly eating off the Cullen's table. Tonight Douche Master wouldn't have to sneak her food. Alice, being the true lady she was, burped. Really loud. The two laughed for a whole ten minutes before deciding it was time to go home. They got the bill, and Bella charged it on her card. Hopefully Renee and Phil would see the damage that was done. And hopefully they would care enough to go ape shit.

"Ready?" Alice asked, grabbing her purse.

Bella nodded. "Yup. I'm ready to walk off the extra weight I just gained from that cake."

Alice laughed. "Me too."

Just as they were about to exit, Bella heard someone calling her name. She turned around, and there was the cute waiter, running towards her. "Bella, hey. Look, I was wondering if you wanted to have dinner some time?"

She felt Alice nudge her in the side. "I'll think about it," Bella told him. In all honestly, she did have to think about it. She didn't even know him!

"Well," He said, pulling out a piece of paper from his pocket. "When you decide, give me a call."

Bella took the paper in her hands. _Brant. _His name was Brant. "Um, sure."

When she glanced at him, he gave her an award winning smile. "I'll be waiting."

And with that, he went back to serving tables.

**x x x x x x**

Bella didn't know who was more excited, she or Alice. The fact that he had given her his number was almost unreal. The way he had looked at her with those violet eyes of his … it was different. She had never had a boy look at her like that. What was better was that he didn't know about her, didn't know how she was treated at school and how she had runaway from home. He didn't know her, and therefore, didn't know she was the Duck.

Deciding to change the subject. Bella asked, "When did you get this car?"

"Last night. I got my license on Thursday night."

"How did you get it so fast?"

"Well, it has been in my garage for a while. I just haven't driven it until now."

_That would explain why it looked so damn new. _

"But," Alice said. "You would have known this, had you been there yesterday. Where were you anyway?"

"Home," Bella mumbled. "I wasn't feeling well."

"Uh-huh," Alice replied. "And whose jacket is that?"

Ah, fuck. Alice had noticed. What was she supposed to do now? Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fu –

"It's my dad's," Bella lied.

"You're a terrible liar."

Bella didn't reply. Instead, she decided to turn the tables back to Alice. "Why did you leave California?"

Alice looked straight ahead, focused on the road. Except her eyes seemed distant, like she was remembering something. And then she smiled at Bella. "When you tell me about your jacket, I'll tell you about Cali," She sighed and parked. "Here's your stop."

Bella looked out the window, stunned. The hour had gone by fast. "Thanks, Alice. You know, for the day and all."

"No problem," She said. "And don't forget to call Brant!"

"I'll think about it," Bella said, just before she shut Alice's door.

Bella walked back to her house, but when Alice was out of sight, she ran back to the Cullen's. That comment about the jacket so that she could get answers from Alice was hard. She knew that she wasn't going to tell her new and only friend about where she got her jacket, or else she would have to tell the whole story. Maybe Alice knew that. Maybe she knew Alice wouldn't tell her this, because she didn't want to tell Bella about her life in California. What was she hiding?

"Psst," someone hissed, just as she reached the side of the house with Douche Master's room. "Isabella!"  
She looked up. "Dou – I mean, _Edward_? What are you doing?" God, it felt weird saying his actual name.

He climbed down the ladder and took her shopping bags, slinging them over his shoulder. "Come up."

Bella followed suit. She didn't know what was going on, but his tone was worrying her. Did someone die? Was something stolen? She really hated being out of the loop. So when she finally made it into his room, she scratched her head and sat down on his couch. "What's wrong?"

Douche Master had put her things on the bed, but now he was pacing his room. "We have ourselves … a situation."

Bella chuckled. "You sound like you just watched _Jersey Shore._"

"This is not something to laugh about, Isabella."

"Oh," She mumbled, realizing his seriousness. "Well, tell me."

"Okay, but don't freak out."

"Just tell me."

Douche Master stopped pacing; he was now in front of Bella. "My mom knows you're here. And she wants to talk to you."

* * *

**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

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**I told you I would update on February 15! HA! Well, if you follow me on twitter you would have known that. Besides that, it's my birthday! No, seriously. It is :) I'm officially 16 and can get my license. Well ... I actually have to go to drivers ed first ... but i have to find time for that. Anyways, the point is that I am now able to get that damn license, one way or another haha.**

**My friends actually played Sweet Sixteen by Hilary Duff to me just before school started. It was super embarrassing, but fun at the same time. I remember when I was eight and would play her Metamorphosis album all the time. Sweet Sixteen was one of my favorites. LOL!**

**Edward showing his good side, and Bella actually accepting it? Sort of. Will it last long? Ummm, maybe or maybe not. We shall see. One thing that's for sure is that Rosalie is going to be a bitch for a long time. She's actually really fun to write. I haven't written a bitchy Rosalie in any of my other stories. I'm enjoying it haha.**

******The trailer for Bottled Lies is up on youtube! The link is on my profile :)**  


**I hope you like the chapter, and let me know what you think by REVIEWING! **

**Karina.**


	7. Chapter Seven: Acceptance

Disclaimer: I don't Twilight. But I own a pair of jeans, which I bought with my own money :) Haha.

Chapter Seven: Acceptance

_**Edward**_

If Edward had known that when he got home later that day, only to realize that his mother knew about Isabella, he probably wouldn't have shown up. He would have told Isabella not to come back because his mom was one step ahead of them. However, that was not the case. No fucking way. How was he supposed to know that when he got home from Rose's house that Esme would be sitting in his bedroom? When he saw his mother's knowing look on her face, he knew that he couldn't lie. Especially since there was a bed on the floor and a stranger's duffle bag in the corner of the room, there was no way out. He definitely couldn't lie when Esme's flowers and Tupperware of brownies for Isabella's birthday were in his room. He just wanted to know one thing: how in the hell did she find out?

"Well, Edward," she sighed. "It's hard not to notice when you hear bickering coming from this room."

Fuck.

"Watch you language, young man," she scolded.

He said that out loud? "Sorry. And I'm sorry for sneaking behind your back. But really, nothing was …"

"Don't say your apologies yet," Esme said as she began to walk out. "Just have her talk to me when she gets back."

Edward didn't respond. How could he when all he could think was that his mother thought the worst? It was a great guess that Esme thought that Isabella and him were having sex. Or were in some kind of romantic getaway. The thought was bizarre. Him and the Freak … it was almost laughable. But how could he tell Esme the truth? Him saying that he found her in the woods, beat up and all, and about to commit suicide was beyond exaggeration. He didn't even know why she didn't want to go home, he only knew that she was scared. He helped, and he didn't fucking know why.

An hour passed, and Isabella still hadn't returned. What did she and Alice do all day? He didn't even ask. So how was he supposed to estimate when she got back? He didn't realize his hands were shaking until he ran one through his hair. He was in shit, and for what, helping a person in need. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck –

Edward heard a car door slam. He looked out his bedroom window, though it was hard since he was facing Isabella's room. He had to turn his head and angle his body in a way in order to see the car. It was a Mercedes, and stepping away from it was Isabella. He didn't know if her arrival was a good thing or a bad thing. Maybe it was a good thing, because he wasn't the only one in shit … and that was a horrible thought.

He hastily helped Isabella bring her things up to his room. She had gone shopping, like … she went all out. On her face was a slight smile, which meant that she and Alice had a good time. A small part of him felt distressed for the news he was about to tell her. Especially since that this bad news probably meant that she would have to go back to her home – a place, for an unknown reason, she did not want to go back to.

"You told her?" Isabella asked, or yelled, when he explained to her what had happened. "How could you?"

Edward held his hands up in his defense. "I didn't tell her shit."

"Then how the hell does she know?"

"Because of this," Edward pointed between them. "Because of our fighting."

Isabella threw her hands in the air. "This is great. Just _fucking _great," She shook her head before taking a deep breath. "What does she want to talk about?"

Edward shrugged. "Hell, if I know."

"I guess she probably wants to talk about me going back home," Isabella whispered.

Before Edward could respond, Isabella began to hyperventilate. Her one hand grasped onto the wall for balance while the other lay on her chest. Her eyes were scared and full of tears. Edward put a hand on her shoulder, and tried to calm her down. "Hey, take slow and even breaths. It's okay. Maybe she'll let you stay."

It took a couple of minutes before Isabella could finally breathe normally again, and by then, Edward's hand was no longer on her shoulder. That touch felt foreign. It felt like he cared for the girl. That was ridiculous. He was only being the gentleman he was raised to be.

"What if she won't let me stay?" Isabella asked.

Edward stared at her for a moment, thinking of an answer. "Then we'll find a place for you. Look, I don't know why you don't want to go home or why you're so injured, but I know what it's like to want to keep privacy so … trust me when I say that I'll help."

"And why should I trust you?"

Again, Edward thought for the right answer. Why was talking to her so hard? "Because right now, I'm the only one who knows you tried to kill yourself. If I haven't told anyone yet, then I won't tell anyone at all."

He watched at Isabella flinched at the comment of suicide. It was then he knew that she didn't want to do it again, and that she regretted her attempt of ending her own life. And even though he told her, and himself, that he respected her privacy, all he wanted to know was: what happened to Isabella Swan? And more importantly, what had changed? He never referred to her as _Freak _or _Duck _verbally or mentally anymore, or at least not as often, and he suddenly wanted to help. Something was fucking wrong in this situation of theirs, and Edward wanted to know what was up.

He would have to wait until after the conversation with Esme, because he was leading Isabella to the kitchen now. God, it was like they were walking down to hell, admitting that they were being hormone-driven teenagers who did something wrong. But that wasn't the case! The dilemma was worse, and he didn't know how Esme would handle it.

"Hi, Isabella," Esme said gently, showing a very genuine smile.

"You can call me Bella, Mrs. Cullen," Isabella replied. Bella? He didn't know she liked to be called that. But it wasn't like he was going to suddenly call her by that name. She didn't offer that it to him.

"Then you can call me Esme. Please, sit," Esme motioned for the chair opposite her. As Isabella sat, so did Edward. "Um, Edward. Don't sit. I just want to talk to Isabella. _Alone_."

Edward rubbed his jaw. "Seriously?" She nodded. He then asked Isabella, "Are you going to be okay?"

"Yes. And you can stop being so nice to me. It freaks me out."

At that comment, Edward laughed. "Believe me, it scares me too," He turned to Esme again. "Are you sure you want me gone?"

"Edward, go."

Knowing that Esme meant what she said, Edward sighed in agreement. He looked at Isabella again. Though her face showed bravery, he knew she was freaking out again. Edward gave her a look that said, _good luck, _because God only knew that she needed it.

**x x x x x x**

An hour had passed and Edward was stuck in his room. He would have been lying on his bed, watching TV as his mother and Isabella talked, but he couldn't. Edward couldn't imagine just lounging on his bed anymore – Isabella slept there. And he couldn't watch TV, not with the anxiety of what was going down one floor below. Instead, he lay on his bed on the floor, his hands folded on his stomach as he stared at the ceiling. In his mind, he played different scenarios. However, no matter how many scenarios he made, none would prove to be correct.

Basically, having to wait was complete and utter _agony. _

Edward wondered why his mother didn't want him to be in the conversation. Or maybe she would interrogate them separately? Fuck, he didn't know. He wanted to know what Isabella was saying, if she was freaking out. The Freak was probably crying her eyes out right now and he couldn't do a thing. And why did he care if she was crying? Holy fuck. He. Was. Going. Insane.

Knowing that staying in his room was only making him more anxious, Edward sprang from the floor and out the door. He was going to pay a dear friend a long awaited visit. With everything that was going on lately, add those monthly checkups, and school, Edward hadn't found time to play his piano. Carlisle taught him when he was young, and was addicted to the instrument every since. He liked how he could get so lost in a song, how his mood could completely shift depending on the melody of the piece. The piano was a good friend – always there and ready to listen to his feelings. Only Rosalie and his family knew about his piano-playing obsession. Well, Isabella sort of knew, but she didn't know it to the extent.

He ran up the stairs quietly, mostly because he wanted to catch snippets of what Esme and Isabella were talking about downstairs. All he heard were whispers and hushed voices, so he didn't even bother trying to strain his ears to listen, no matter how much he wanted to. It wasn't until he touched the door did he finally hear something.

"… Why did you wait so long?"

"I-I don't know. The thought scared me."

But that was all he heard, because then the two were whispering again. Edward sighed and stepped through the room, turning on the lights and closing the door behind him. He knew Esme was the one asking the questions, but did it scare Isabella? Edward rubbed his jaw and sat on the piano bench. In front of him were many pieces. He had written most of them. He remembered when he was younger, and was starting to write his own music, that his grandparents told him that he could be a famous pianist one day. Just like his Uncle Felix. And as much as Edward loved the thought of touring and sharing his work wit other people, he knew his father didn't want it. Uncle Felix had given into drugs while on tour, and was currently in rehab for overdosing.

And then the symptoms began, and he knew that Carlisle would be even more protective of his family.

However, Edward was confident in his family – the Cullen's were strong. One day, he would be able to get his music out there. One day.

Edward played a piece he had written a few weeks ago. It was unfinished, but he knew it was one of his favorites. It was pretty and soft, and had a little mystery. Edward had only started to add lyrics to his music for a couple of years, so he knew the reason this song wasn't finished was because the lyrics were trash. He erased and wrote, erased and wrote. No lyric seemed to be right. Edward hated it when he couldn't get things right the first time. It was unbelievably frustrating. But he loved his piano and he loved music, so he continued playing.

Plus, playing the piano took most of his mind off of the situation he was currently in.

_Knock. Knock. Knock._

Fuck that nice thought.

"Who is it?" Edward called.

"Son, if you don't open this door, I will knock it down myself."

Carlisle.

Edward always locked the door whenever he was playing the piano. That meant he didn't want to be bothered, and the people who walked in would face hell. But Edward opened the door for his father because he was chill, and idolized him. Yeah, he said it. He was proud of his dad and thought of him as a role model. A mama's boy and the all American son – fuck it. Edward didn't give a shit. He was complex.

"Dad," Edward said. "What's up?"

Carlisle nodded his head out the door. "Sit with me, Edward."

Damn. He should have seen this coming – Esme would talk with Isabella and Carlisle would chat with him. Edward complied, sitting on the stairs with his father. Carlisle didn't look mad or anxious, he looked calm. However, Edward knew that being a doctor meant that he was very good at having a calm front, but inside would be a different story. He could never tell what his father was thinking, and that was one of the reasons Edward admired Carlisle.

"So," his father said, breaking the silence. "How long has Isabella Swan been staying in your room?"

"Not long. Since Thursday," Edward replied. "But nothing happened, I swear. You can cross off the thought of us doing it. There was a problem, and I simply handed her a solution."

"And what was this problem?"

Edward scratched his head. "I don't know if I can say."

He could see Carlisle nod from the corner of his eye. "I admire your loyalty to Isabella. Especially since I was with your mother talking to her."

"You were?" Edward asked, not remembering seeing his father at the table.

"Not in the beginning of the conversation," Carlisle explained. "But I was there for most of it. And I have to say, Edward. What you did was a good thing."

"And why is that?"

Edward was looking at his dad now. And he saw that Carlisle had realized something. "So you don't know?"

"Know what?"

"It's not my story to tell, Son. You'll have to ask Isabella."

Edward almost laughed. "Even if I asked, she wouldn't tell me. We're not friends, and I'm pretty sure if she wasn't so injured that she would push me down the stairs and then stab me to death."

"Dramatic," Carlisle laughed. "But I think she has respect for you. She definitely doesn't realize it, and you don't either, but you two kind of get along. Except for those times you argue."

"Which is ninety-eight percent of our conversations," Edward chimed in.

"That may be so. But if you truly hated her, you wouldn't have offered our home to her. And if she truly hated you, she wouldn't have accepted."

"Yeah … I still don't know what that was about."

"You're a good person, Edward. Your mother and I have done our job," Carlisle patted his back, and Edward grinned. It was always nice to hear that his parents were proud of him. He hated it when they were disappointed. "But next time, do you think you can tell us when you decide to give someone shelter? Actually, just don't hide things from us. We're your parents, and we'll support you no matter what."

Edward nodded. "I will. And Dad? Thanks for being so understanding."

"No problem, Son. Now let's go down. I think Esme and Bella are almost done making dinner."

"So she can stay?" Edward asked. Carlisle grinned and Edward released a sigh of relief. Something about Isabella's home was scaring her, and Edward worried that she would have to go back. He was worried that she would make another suicide attempt.

Just as Edward and his father stood up, Edward felt his head go light. The room spun for a good two seconds, and he had to hold onto his father's arm for support. He closed his eyes, waiting for this phase to end. It never lasted long, but it sucked whenever it came. His stomach was empty, and he knew it was because he was hungry. But how could he eat, especially when he was worried sick about Isabella's fate?

"Are you okay?" He heard Carlisle ask, his voice full of concern.

Edward nodded, which wasn't a good idea because it made him sway again. "Yeah. I'm just hungry – I haven't eaten much today. It's nothing, Dad."

"Edward, if you're not feeling well, I need you to tell me …"

"Dad. When you come home, that means you can turn off the Doctor Radar. I'm only hungry. Now c'mon. Let's go eat."

Even though Edward began to descend the stairs smoothly, mainly because he was gripping the banister so hard that his knuckles were turning white, he could feel his father's stare. Edward wanted to tell him that he was fine, and that he had nothing to worry about. But he didn't, because he knew that Carlisle would worry no matter what. Just like Esme.

**x x x x x x**

The kitchen smelled of maple and potatoes.

He knew that Esme was in a good mood when the room smelled like her favorite dish – smoked salmon in a maple glaze with mashed potatoes. He wouldn't dare tell his jock friends, or any friends, that it was his favorite meal as well. As far as they knew, steak was the best bet. But his family knew him well. They knew what Edward enjoyed and what he liked to keep secret.

Catching Esme's eye, he smiled sheepishly. He leaned to give her a kiss on the cheek, because he was thankful that his parents were so chill and understanding. She hugged him for a long time, only to ruin the moment with a slap – a very harsh slap – on the back.

Edward winced, knowing he deserved it. "Sorry, Mom."

Esme released him and touched his cheek. He knew that Esme grew sad that Edward was getting older, but c'mon. He was seventeen; he didn't his mom to hover him all the time. "It's okay, Edward. You're a good boy. But just so you know – I'm more aware than you think. And it's perfectly fine if Bella stays here. In fact, I would prefer it if she did."

"Why?"

Edward watched as Esme turned her head towards Isabella. She was mashing the potatoes and adding seasoning. She was biting her bottom lip, which, he noticed, meant that she was nervous. "In time, honey. It really does depend on Bella."

Edward gave an understanding expression towards his mother, but inside he was pissed. The whole family knew Isabella's secret, _except _him. He understood why she wouldn't tell him, what; with all the ridicule and malice he had given to her throughout the years, but still. He helped her out, gave her shelter. He kept her suicide a secret and snuck into her room to get her belongings. Didn't Edward deserve to know? Out of anyone in the house, didn't Edward seem like the best candidate to keep a secret?

But then again, he hadn't told Isabella his secret.

His inward rage settled down, and he began to set the table, trying to make it seem like he was fine. Edward was glad that Isabella could stay, that she didn't have to go back, but he just wanted to know _why. _Edward wondered when his life suddenly became more complicated than it had ever been. And as much as he wanted to tell himself that it began when he followed Isabella into the woods, he knew it was a lie. Edward glanced at Esme, sighing when he remembered how she was a few years ago. Hating that his mother was in that state. Hating the guilt that hovered him because he couldn't do shit to make the situation better. The truth was that life became harder when the symptoms began.

Edward ignored how dizzy he felt, how his stomach yelled for nutrition. The scents in the kitchen were merely teasing him. He could feel Carlisle watching him. He hated that – hated feeling like he was fragile. Edward gave Carlisle a reassuring smile, which grew when he saw the plate of food set on the dark wooden table. Finally. It was to eat.

He and his parents sat down quickly, but it wasn't until he heard the chair opposite him make a _screech_ on the floor, did he realize Isabella was still standing. She looked anxiously at the table, almost like she didn't know if she should sit down with the Cullen family.

"You can sit, sweetheart," Esme smiled.

Carlisle motioned to her seat. "No need to worry – as long as you're staying with us, you're family."

Even with those kind words, Isabella stood. She glanced at his parents with hesitant eyes, not knowing if it was right. When she looked at Edward with questioning eyes, he finally understood why she wouldn't sit. Isabella wanted to know if it was okay with _him_, if it was okay to have dinner with _his_ family. Edward felt guilty. Did he do something to make her feel like it wasn't okay to have a casual meal with them? Yes, he did. He constantly made fun of her at school, and told her that he didn't like her. But he hadn't done anything like that recently. Sure, they still fought, but that's just how they were together. If anything, he respected her for being strong …

Whoa. _Respected _her? Isabella Swan, the Duck. The Freak. When had he grown a sense of reverence for the girl?

Realizing she was still watching him, Edward snapped out of his daze. He gave her a smile and nodded his head. "Sit, Isabella. I'm sure you're hungry."

With his words, she sat down and sighed. Almost like she was relieved. As she ate, Edward couldn't help but watch her. To anyone, it would have looked like she was just hesitant because of the situation. But Edward felt like he knew better. She was scared. Something was scaring her. Like at any minute, someone would slap the table and hit her. Or something. Isabella looked uncomfortable as the Cullen's talked and ate. As dinner went on Isabella seemed to relax. She would answer questions when asked, and would give opinions (only polite ones) when she felt it was right. At least, that's how Edward saw it. She was so complex, and Edward wanted to know what was going through her mind. He was trying to figure her out – he never had a problem reading people, but Isabella was different. But what was so _different _about her? Fuck, she was so _frustrating._

"Let's discuss rooms," He heard Carlisle stay. "I don't think it would be right for Isabella –"

"Bella," Isabella interrupted. "You can call me Bella, Mr. Cullen."

Carlisle chuckled. "Of course, Bella. As I was saying, it wouldn't be appropriate for Bella to stay in your room, Edward. So Esme and I thought it would fit for Bella to stay in the guest room."

"I don't want to be an intrusion. The guest room is too much. I would be fine with crashing on your couch."

"Now, Bella," Esme said. "You're a guest. And as a _guest, _you can stay in the _guest _room. It would be no bother at all. Besides, no one ever stays there, it would give us an excuse to finally use it."

Isabella bit her lip, thinking. But eventually she agreed. Esme clapped her hands with a smile, saying how she had to get sheets and such. Carlisle grinned and continued to eat. Edward didn't know what his own reaction was, but Isabella gave him a small smile, mouthing, _thank you._ Edward nodded in response, but didn't know why she was thanking him. He didn't offer the room, actually he never really thought of it. Again, he noted at how complex the girl was. He wondered if Isabella knew that her mysterious demeanor frustrated him, and if she did it on purpose.

Instead of asking her, Edward continued to eat his dinner.

**x x x x x x**

Edward swore as he erased the lyrics he had just written. None of the words he chose seemed to fit. Music had never been difficult for him, so why was it now? He wiped his brow of invisible sweat and began to play the piece he had written for Uncle Felix – like a Get Well card – even though his uncle would never hear it. Edward believed that Uncle Felix was secretly ashamed of the drugs and how his stress had gotten to him. Edward hadn't even seen his uncle since Christmas of '07. He doubted he would see his mother's brother ever again.

But he played the song anyway, because he was proud of it. He was sure if Uncle Felix heard it, he would be proud too. It always relaxed him, and he didn't know why. Edward thought that it was because it was a reminder of how Uncle Felix used to be without the drugs, of who Edward wanted to be when he was older. But he didn't know – Edward was too damn analytical for his own good. And when the song was over, Edward rested his hands on his thighs. Breathing slowly. That was enough piano playing for one night, and Edward didn't want to stress over lyrics that weren't ready to be written. He closed his piano and pushed the bench back in. Edward made sure his piano was in the best shape before shutting the lights, and closing the room.

He traveled down the stairs. Edward was almost at his room when he glanced at the door next to his. It was the guest room and it was wide open. From inside, he could hear shuffling and murmuring. Isabella was talking with his mom.

"I'm so sorry for what you've been through, honey," He heard Esme say. "Good night."

"Thank you, Esme. You don't know how much I appreciate this."

Esme then exited, waving goodbye to Isabella once. She saw Edward staring, and hugged him. "Good night, darling. Sleep well, okay?"

"I will, mom," He muttered.

Esme stepped back, staring at her son. "Be careful with her, okay? That's all I ask." Edward nodded, not knowing how to respond to that. And once she was gone, into her own bedroom, Edward took a few steps toward his neighbor. Before he knocked, he saw Isabella organizing her things. She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, revealing the healing black eye.

_What happened to you, Isabella?_

But Edward never asked. Instead, he knocked. Isabella jumped, shocked. "Sorry," Edward apologized. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"I don't mean to wound your ego, but you're not as scary as you think you are," Isabella retorted.

Edward laughed. "Wow. Thanks."

Isabella shrugged. He watched as she grabbed his hoodie from the bed, returning it to him. "Thank you for this. You were right – it was cold outside."

"I usually am," He said. Isabella rolled her eyes. Edward felt the fabric between his fingers, and before he knew it, he was giving her the hoodie. "Keep it. Think of it as a peace offering."

"Peace offering?"

Edward nodded. "Look, I know I haven't been nice to you in the past, but that's … well, the past. I'm willing to move on. So what do you say, truce?"

Isabella eyed the hoodie. She took it in her hands and glanced back at Edward. Just then, Edward noticed how her eyes resembled milk chocolate. How her lashes were long and her skin was flawless. When did Isabella become pretty good looking?

"I'll think about it," Isabella finally said. "Thanks for the hoodie."

"Yeah. Good night, then?"

"Good night," Bella replied.

Just before Edward left, he said, "You know, when you're not so stubborn … you're okay."

Bella laughed. Actually _laughed. _"And when you're not such a douche, you're bearable."

With those words, Edward left. He went into his own room and leaned against the closed the door. Something was wrong. Only a minute ago, Edward thought that Isabella was attractive. And they actually had a _civil _conversation. Edward didn't know how to handle this change. The Freak would always be a freak, right?

No, the answer was no. For some reason, Isabella didn't seem like a freak. She was infuriating and frustratingly stubborn. She could also be a class 'A' bitch. But he saw something different not too long ago. What the fuck was wrong with him? Whatever it was, Edward didn't know what to do with it. And he didn't know if he liked it or not.

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**I'm terribly sorry for the long update. Life has been hectic and the fact that i was finally able to update this story is amazing. You don't know how long I've been wanting to get this up. Anyways, I won't make this too long. I have to sleep haha.**

**I want to thank you such much for the birthday wishes :) Your thoughtful words really made my sweet sixteen truly amazing. Love you guys!**

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**Karina**


	8. Chapter Eight: Veiled

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a Nintendo DS which i just recently found! Haha

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Chapter Eight: Veiled

_**Bella**_

What. The. Fuck.

Those were the three words racing through Bella's thoughts as she laid quietly on the bed that the Cullen's guest bedroom acquired. The bed was comfortable, the blankets soft and the pillows representing that of clouds. But still, she found her hands clasped on her stomach as she stared at the ceiling. She couldn't sleep, and it didn't help with those damn words interrupting her rest.

Bella frustratingly turned on her side, closing her eyes and releasing a relieved sigh. She had begun the day with a shopping trip. She had to admit Alice _did _prove that purchasing clothes was fun, and that sushi was amazing. Bella thought of when they went to that café, how the cute boy, Brant, had given her his number. That messy chestnut hair and lavender eyes, his tan skin and broad shoulders. Bella still couldn't believe that _he _wanted to go on a date with _her. _Brant was adorable, and she … well. She wasn't the cutest girl in the world. But still, she was flattered.

Then there was the car ride with Alice. How she had hounded Bella about the hoodie, knowing that it wasn't Phil's. Now that Bella thought about it, it was obvious that it didn't belong to her 'father'. The style was much too modern and the size would never fit on him. It was clear that it belonged to a teenage boy. Alice knew this, but Bella didn't want to tell. So she asked her about California, and she regretted it when Alice replied so harsh. The look on Alice's face after she heard the question; it was like she was wondering if she should tell Bella or not. It was then that Bella knew that the Brandon's moved to Forks for more of a reason than, 'wanting a change of environment'. Something happened in California … and Bella wanted to know what it was. The two were friends now, right? Friends told each other secrets …

Then why didn't Bella tell Alice hers?

Bella shifted to the other side, trying to make herself comfortable. She remembered the feeling when Douche Master had told her that his mother knew about their arrangement. Anxiety. Horror. Worry. And when Douche Master had told her that if his parents wouldn't let her stay, he would help her find another place? Damn. That was weird. He had been so nice to her lately – granted, they still fought a lot, and she knew that wouldn't change. But that was just it. Why in all that was holy, was he suddenly so humble? He was the devil incarnate, the male version of Regina George. And yet, he wanted to help her out. Maybe it was because he was trying to fulfill his status of being neighborly, or maybe he pitied her. She hoped it was because he wanted to be a good neighbor. Bella didn't need pity – didn't need to be looked down upon more than she already was.

And when Mr. and Mrs. Cullen – or Carlisle and Esme – allowed her to stay, she was shocked. What shocked her even more was that they _knew. _They guessed what was going on inside the Swan Residence, but weren't sure until she told them. Well, it was more like they asked her if they were right … she only proved so. They had wanted to tell the police, and as much as Bella wanted to, she told Esme and Carlisle not to. Bella explained that they were still her parents, and even though what they were doing was wrong, she cared about them. Esme understood, but Carlisle was hesitant. He agreed, but only because Esme told him to.

However, the truth was that Bella didn't want to tell the police until she figured out who her father was. She wanted to find him and she wanted to meet him. Charles wanted to meet her, too, right? So that meant that if anything happened, he would be fine with taking her in. That was the plan. Once she was sure that Charles was the real deal and would respect her, she would call the police. Bella would show her injuries and Esme and Carlisle would be witnesses. Well, not really. They would merely support her.

It was then, she realized, that Douche Master still didn't know. He didn't know about the abuse, didn't know that Phil wasn't actually her father. That she wasn't a Swan, but a Garland. No one knew about Charles. Did she want to tell Esme and Carlisle? Yes. They had been so kind and understanding, after all. They allowed Bella to stay in their household, agreeing not to call the police or inform her parents where she was. The whole family had vowed to keep Bella safe. She was more than grateful. Even to Douche Master, even thought she still hated him.

Or at least … Bella thought she still hated that egotistical shame for a man.

Eventually, Bella felt her eyelids close. Her hands relaxed and her breaths became even. She was exhausted, and more than welcomed the peaceful rest that overcame her.

**x x x x x x**

Bella unwillingly woke up at nine in the morning. She had gotten little to none hours of sleep and all she wanted to do was envelope in her, rare, calm dreams. But as she attempted to fall back asleep, the light coming through the window denied her of it. It didn't help that the walls were the same yellow color as the rest of the house. Bella groaned and rubbed her eyes. It was Sunday morning and the sun had made some time for Forks. God had finally come through.

Well, not really. She was still scared of going home, and questioned if her whole life was a lie.

Bella sighed. On a day like this, Renee would be making waffles with that homemade whip cream of hers. She might even be brewing some iced tea for later. Bella usually enjoyed Sundays because Phil would go out with his friends for the whole day. This would leave Bella to spend some quality time with her mother, which she had to admit, wasn't that bad. Little did she know that her own mother was lying to her. All those times Renee told Bella that she could come to her if she ever needed someone to vent to, it turned out that Mommy had been hypocritical. She had been hiding something all along. And why? Why hide something so important? Bella didn't know, and she was indifferent.

Indifferent because, even though she was overly pissed at Renee for lying, and that she let Phil hurt Bella, she was confused because she didn't know why Renee had done it. For all Bella knew, Charles Garland was a criminal or a man in heavy debt. And even so, he was probably less harmful than Phil. But there must have been a reason, right? Renee must have kept Bella in the dark for a reason.

Bella decided to get ready before heading downstairs. Douche Master may have seen her in sweats with no makeup on, but she didn't need to let his parents see her look like shit. Bella still had some dignity and pride, even though most of it was, literally, kicked out of her.

After pulling on some leggings and a long v-neck floral shirt, she slipped into the leather, over-the-knee boots she had purchased the day before in Port Angeles. It was sunny out, but Bella knew her town. So she wrapped a green scarf around her neck to keep warm. Bella did her hair the same was as yesterday – having it parted on the side to give her long swept bangs, because she knew people liked it. And to think Douche Master had styled her hair for her just to hide the black eye. As Bella did her makeup – some eyeliner and mascara – she could see that the bruise on her eye was almost healed. It was barely noticeable.

"Knock, knock," Bella heard a deep voice say as she finished up.

Bella looked away from the mirror and averted her eyes to where the voice had come from. Douche Master stood with his hands in his pockets. "Good morning," she greeted trying to keep the conversation civil. "How long have you been awake for?"

Douche Master shifted his weight onto the balls of his feet before rocking back to his heels. He ran a hand through his hair and shrugged. "A couple hours. I couldn't sleep," Bella nodded, knowing how he felt. "My parents just left for church and will be out all day. So I guess it's just you and me."

"Oh," Bella responded, hearing disappointment in her own voice. She had gotten all dressed up for nothing. "I see."

Douche Master must have sensed that she was disheartened because he corrected himself. "But you know, you can do your own thing if you want."

He hated her, right? Then why did he sound upset? Bella pulled her hair to one side and shook her head. "I didn't mean it like that. Besides, we should try this truce of ours."

Did she really just say that?

Apparently she did, because even Douche Master seemed shocked. She wasn't aware of her own expression, but Douche Master composed his as quick as it came. "Okay. Cool. Do you want some breakfast then?"

"Sure," Bella said slowly. "I'll cook."

"No it's okay, you're the guest. I'll cook," Douche Master offered.

"And I'm grateful that your family has gone to such an extent for me, but really, let me make breakfast. It's the least I can do."

"Well, my parents aren't here. So let me do it. You can make, whatever, another day."

"Why don't _you _make breakfast another day?" Bella asked, though it sounded more malicious than she intended.

Now she had done it. Douche Master narrowed his eyes and gripped the door. "Because it's _my _house and if I want to treat a guest, I can."

Bella threw her hands in the air in annoyance. "Fine. Then I'll just grab my shit and leave! You don't have to worry about 'treating' me anymore."

"Fine, leave. You are such a _bitch_!" He yelled.

"Fuck you, asshole," Bella seethed as she grabbed her things, pushing him out the door. She could feel the tops of her ears turn red as she packed her things. He was still standing in front of the room, watching her. Bella didn't look at him; she was too pissed off to even acknowledge him. Who the fuck did he thing he was? All Bella wanted to do was show some gratitude …

Her wrist burned when she scratched it against the corner of the vanity, grabbing her makeup in haste. She held it in pain and took a sharp intake in breath. It was a small scratch, but it made her stitches bleed. She had forgotten to wrap it in gauze earlier. She regretted it.

"Damn it," She muttered.

She felt him beside her before she heard that irritating voice. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Bella snapped. "I just scratched my stitches on the vanity."

Douche Master scoffed. "You would."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Forget it. Come with me," He ordered, pulling her as he led her to Carlisle's study. Bella remembered when she was locked inside the music room beside it. Douche Master let go of her arm once they reached the room. She watched as he pulled out tools and some sort of medicine. It only took one look at Bella's wrist for him to say, "We're going to have to re-stitch it."

"_What_?" She shrieked.

"Don't worry – you only ripped two of them," Douche Master replied as he cleansed her wound. "But maybe you shouldn't have scratched them out in the first place."

"Well maybe you shouldn't have called me a bitch."

"You called me an asshole."

"Only after you called me a – ow!" Bella jumped when the needle poked through her skin.

"Sorry," She heard him grumble. "Just try to keep still."

Bella kept quiet and stagnant, even though she wanted to punch Douche Master in the face and yell at him with the most vulgar language known to humankind. She wasn't going to lie to herself either – she really wanted to kick him in the balls. It was _his _fault that she had been in such a hurry to leave. If he had let her cook breakfast, then she wouldn't have cut her wrist. God, she really felt like hurting Douche Master. But he was stitching her up, so she couldn't do anything.

She tapped her foot out of boredom, and to create a distraction from the pain in her wrist. Bella didn't know when he was finished; because by the time he was done, the pain had been so much that her wrist was almost numb.

"There," Douche Master muttered. "Good as new."

With that, Bella left his side, grumbling a small, "Thank you," as she exited Carlisle's study. She went back to the guest room Esme and Carlisle had offered her in annoyance and rage. All she had wanted to do was make breakfast for him. It was the least she could do since he had done so much for her. Yes, _him._ Not his parents, but Douche Master himself. He was the one who had found Bella, had stopped her from making the biggest mistake ever. He was the one who had taken her to his house, knowing that his parents could find her at any minute, but didn't care because he knew she didn't want to go back home. And even though his parents had let her stay, he was still nice to her … until minutes ago. Douche Master had turned back into his regular self.

Well, now that Bella had thought about it, maybe it wasn't _entirely _his fault. She was the one whose words sounded more malevolent first, even though she didn't mean to make it sound that way. She couldn't help it! It was her instinct to be stubborn and to stand up for herself. So they were both at fault here. And even though Bella still wanted to kick Douche Master's balls, she felt childish.

Bella ran a hand through her hair and let out a loud breath. She despised being wrong. But she knew that she had to be the first to say something. So as Bella left the room, she came face to face with Douche Master, who also looked surprised to see her.

"Look," Bella started, "I'm sorry for what I said. I overreacted."

"I'm sorry, too. I guess I overreacted as well."

"You _guess_?"

"Okay," Douche Master stood back. "I _did _overreact. But it's just natural to act that way with you."

Bella nodded. "I couldn't agree more. It's hard to be nice to someone you hate." Douche Master laughed, even though she wasn't joking.

"Look," He began. "Even though our truce lasted for about one minute, how about we start over? Starting with breakfast. We can both make it."

Bella thought about it. Was a truce the best thing for her and Douche Master? They hated each other, and suddenly he wanted them to get along? What kind of fucked up mojo was this? But Bella had feeling that he was trying because he felt bad for her. And even though she didn't need anyone's sympathy, in a way she was sort of flattered. If she were going to stay in the Cullen's house for a bit, then she would have to be civil with the jerk-off.

"Okay," Bella agreed. "Now let's get some breakfast – my stomach is grumbling like crazy."

"Try not to burn anything."

"Shut up, asshole," she responded.

"You know, I'm really not a bad guy," Douche Master defended.

Bella nodded her head in sarcasm. "Uh huh."

Once they made it to the kitchen, they had planned out what to cook. Though it took a long time to organize, Bella cooked omelets and Douche Master made pancakes. Bella asked him to make those chocolate chip pancakes he had made the other day because, to be honest, they were scrumptious. But then again, Esme was an amazing baker. She must have taught her son some secrets. However, Bella wasn't complaining. She was able to cook _and _get her pancakes. In the end, it sort of worked out. Though she wasn't sure if she should be offended when Douche Master told her that he was surprised the omelets tasted good. Actually, she was offended. But she didn't say anything snappy because they had agreed to keep the truce.

"I'm thinking of lounging on the couch with a bowl of popcorn and the remote in my hand for this Sunday," Douche Master told Bella as they cleaned the kitchen. "Are you in?"

Bella put the pan in its rightful place once she finished drying it. "Shouldn't we get started on that creative assignment of ours? I mean, we only get so little time in class to work on it, and we haven't even talked about a theme. Some partners have their whole outline written out."

Douche Master slapped his forehead with the palm of his hand. "Shit. I forgot about that. I guess no TV or popcorn for us."

"Not necessarily," Bella said. "We could work on the project with a bowl of popcorn. All we have to do today is figure out what the hell we're writing about. After that we can do whatever it is we want."

Douche Master agreed, and five minutes later, the smell of melted butter swam throughout the room. In that time, Bella had gotten the basic supplies – pencils and paper. The Cullen's had their whole house organized, which made it so much easier to find things. Back at home, there was always mail scattered across the counter, jackets hung on the banister instead of in the closet, and Renee's latest phase would surely be all over the house. The only thing that was remotely clean was the floor, and that was because Bella had cleaned it every Wednesday. And yet, Esme had her home as clean as a show house. Another thing that was strange was that Carlisle and Douche Master had helped clean after dinner last night. Back home, Bella specifically remembered Phil saying that men didn't clean. It was the woman's job. She hadn't completely agreed – actually, she didn't agree at all – but it was still weird to see, them assist.

Alas, Bella set down the supplies, and the bowl of freshly made popcorn sat in front of her as she tapped the pencil. She was aware that Douche Master was staring at her, but she was too busy thinking of the differences between the Cullen's and the Swan's that she completely forgot about the assignment. This house always smelled like baked goods, whereas her house didn't have a smell. It was just a building that people lived in. This house … it was actually a _home. _She had never experienced it before. In this house, people cared for each other and actually felt comfortable and safe. Bella never felt that next-door. She hated Phil and feared him. She couldn't sleep at night unless her bedroom door was locked, and living there had become more like a job.

A light kick on the shin surprised Bella enough to take a sharp intake of breath. She quickly regretted it; her abdomen telling her it was a bad idea. Bella had to remember that she was still broken, and that just because her eye was healing didn't mean the rest of her body would at the same rate. She clutched her stomach gently and hunched over, letting out breath of pain, waiting for the throbbing to stop. She didn't even want to think of how painful it would be if someone hit her there.

"Sorry," She heard Douche Master apologize. "I didn't mean to kick you. I was just moving my legs around."

"It's okay," Bella said. "I shouldn't have been so shocked and breathe in as fast as I had."

And why _was _she so startled? It was just a light tap after all. Bella realized then that it reminded her of Phil, how her reflexes had taught her to react when she was touched unanticipated. She shook her head, showing Douche Master that she was all right, though it was really for her to stop thinking of Phil and move on. If he and Renee hadn't started looking for her now, they probably never would.

"So … what should be writing about?" Douche Master asked.

"Not something cliché like a girl meets a boy and it turns out he's famous. And then the story is based on their love life and how they struggle with the boy's celebrity. Done too many times, and I'm pretty sure I heard Eric Yorkie and his partner talking about it."

He chuckled. "I wasn't even considering that, but okay. We won't do it."

Bella tapped her pencil again, trying to brainstorm some ideas. She never had a problem with writing, and she didn't know why she was suddenly having issues. Her piece of paper was blank, but filled with shame. And when she looked at Douche Master's paper, she was shocked to see it was filled. She didn't know what to do when he pushed the paper towards her. Was he trying to mock her?

"Read it," he said. "It's not going to bite."

"Oh, right," Bella, said, though she was a little embarrassed.

"Don't laugh, okay? It was just an idea."

"I won't."

And Bella _didn't_ laugh. His idea was actually acceptable. She raised her eyebrows as she read, and even though there were some things that could be fixed, the plot was terrific. How was it possible that an idiot like _that_ could even contemplate a theme like _this_? She was talking about the boy who laughed at people falling, and constantly got shitty grades. At least, that's what she had heard. She had chemistry with the fucker last year and all she heard him say was, _just a shitty grade again. No big._ Could it be that he was lying? Maybe it was luck. Bella's mind was blown, and the world of intelligence she once knew was just fucked over.

"You don't like it, huh? It's okay. It was only a thought…"

Bella shook her head at him. "No. It's good."

"Really?" Douche Master asked, almost like he was surprised to hear that I liked it.

"Yeah," Bella scanned his writing again. "It is."

She heard Douche Master laugh. "Well don't act so surprised."

"But I am!" Bella explained. "No offense, but you don't really have the best grades in the school."

"I'm a good actor, Isabella. That's why I'm always asked to play in the school productions. I never do, of course. I don't want to be a loser."

"So, what. You lie about your tests, all in the sake of keeping a high rank in Forks High?"

"Pretty much."

Bella scoffed. "Do you realize how fucked up that is?"

Douche Master shrugged. "Reputation is everything. Especially when you live in a small town. Everyone knows everyone, which means that what people know should be good things."

"And pretending to be stupid is good?"

"No," He said. "But no one really gives a shit about grades. They only care about whom you hang with and how you act. What party is the place to be and what clothes are trending. Forks is very superficial, but no one talks about education."

"Like I said. That is _so _fucked up."

"This whole situation is a new world of fuckery," Douche Master grumbled.

"I can't believe I am saying this. But I agree with you."

Bella felt like shuddering after saying that.

The room was quiet, and Bella felt like mumbling, _awkward. _She still couldn't believe that the guy actually _lied _about his intelligence, all in the sake of his reputation. Who did shit like that? After thinking that question, Bella realized that people who actually had _good _reps would do that. If she was popular and went to the coolest parties, she probably would have done the same thing. People in Forks did know everyone, and they most likely knew that Bella was a loser. So yeah, she understood why Douche Master would want to keep a high status. Who would want to stoop as low as the Freak?

Holy shit … did she just _understand _Douche Master?

Suddenly, she noticed Douche Master's fingertip. It was bleeding. And even though it was a small prick, the sight made her nauseas. "Are you aware that you're bleeding?"

His eyes met hers, and for a second, she noticed how green they were. They didn't look like the eyes of a monster; they actually looked intriguing. And with that thought, she snapped herself out of it.

"Oh, yeah. I just cut myself when we were cooking earlier. No big," he said, popping some popcorn into his mouth.

"But I was with you when you made the pancakes. You were nowhere near anything sharp …"

"Why don't you want to go home?" He suddenly asked. And even though Bella knew he only questioned her to change the subject, it wasn't something she was willing to talk about. Not with him. Not with anyone. Only his parents knew, and that was because they were already aware of what was going on.

"Why won't you tell me why you're bleeding? It's small, anyways. I can go fetch a band-aid."

He narrowed his eyes. "Why won't you answer my question?"

Bella crossed her arms over her chest. "Why won't you answer mine? I asked first."

"Because it's nothing to worry about," He simply said. "It's merely a prick, while you don't want to go back to _your own home._"

"It's none of your business," She shot back.

"It kind of already is," Douche Master retorted.

Bella pushed her chair back and ran upstairs. And even though they weren't really fighting, and that his comment made her conscious, she still knew it was true. Douche Master had become her business since he saw her in the woods. Not when he offered, and not when she accepted the offer. When he _saw _what she was doing to herself. Just thinking of that night brought remorse and embarrassment. It was like Douche Master knew just which strings to pull, knew how to get on her bad side. But now she knew that he was definitely hiding something. Why didn't he want to tell her why he was bleeding? He was right; it was barely even a scratch, but still. She had noticed it yesterday, and there was no way it could still look so fresh twenty-four hours later.

Something was up. And even though Bella didn't want to admit it – she was glad that she wasn't the only one in Forks hiding something.

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**I am so so so so so so so so so SORRY that i'm updating this more than a month later than the last. I'll be honest with you all and say that inspiration was seriously lacking late March and pretty much of all April. It's competition season for dance and i'm getting super stressed because of school and whatnot. This is my first weekend in a long time that I actually have no dance and no homework. Inspiration hit me like a ton of bricks and I wrote for Bottled Lies all day. I hope you forgive me.**

**Anyways, this chapter is more of a filler than anything else. Think of it as a break for what is going to happen later. I'm not going to say anything ... but just be prepared! Some serious shit is about to go down.**

**I wanted to thank all of my readers for reviewing last chapter. I got 60+ reviews! I know some writers get like 200+ per chapter ... but I don't really care. I am so grateful for your support. I love each and every one of my readers so much, and I'm thankful that you care for me enough to send me feedback and love. And I'm seriously thankful that you adore this story as much as I do. I love you and I adore you, and thank you :)**

**If you have any questions, feel free to send me a message on here, tweet me on Twitter, or ask on my Tumblr. I _will_ answer your questions.**

**Thanks again, my lovelies. I hope all of you have an amazing Easter! Please review; tell me if you liked the chapter, if you have predictions, your favorite color ... whatever. I'm just grateful to have you!**

**God Bless,**

**Karina.**


	9. Chapter Nine: Reaction

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. But I do own a bottle of China Glaze's "Crackle Glaze" in _Broken Hearted._ It's pretty much the same thing as OPI's _Shattered_ nail polish, but more affordable and in pink :)

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Chapter Nine: Reaction

_**Edward**_

Why was she so damn difficult? Isabella made him so angry … it was like she knew how to piss him off. And though he was kind of impressed that she spoke her mind about him with vulgar and ease, it still made Edward want to punch a wall. Isabella had no business knowing about his finger. He didn't even tell Rose when she asked. He sure as hell wouldn't tell the Duck. It was a two way street – she wouldn't tell him her story, and he had no story tell.

A realization made Edward groan. If there was anything that he learned about Isabella in the few days she had been staying at his house, it was that she was stubborn. Not to mention she was a curious little bitch. His outburst probably gave her all the more reason to ask questions. When the fuck did he turn so stupid? He was one of Forks High School's top students for crying out loud! And yet he didn't know how to react around Isabella, didn't know what went through that mind of hers. It fucking pissed him off. Edward couldn't have Isabella thinking something was up, especially since nothing really _was _going on. It was a personal issue and it was insignificant. Esme was sensitive of it, and Carlisle was too. But Edward was strong.

Edward hadn't realized he had been standing in front of the guest room for quite some time. He knew Isabella was inside even though the door was closed. And yet, he felt like the door had separated them for miles. It was the oddest feeling, and he couldn't shake it off. It didn't make sense to him, but for some reason, he wanted to knock down that door and make sure that Isabella was all right. He didn't know how he felt about that.

"Isabella?" Edward said, though it sounded like a question. "C'mon. I know you're in there."

The door swung open with haste. So fast, that he gasped when he was met with Isabella standing before him. "I'm not hiding the fact that I'm in here, Dou … _Edward,_" Her voice was flat, almost like she was defeated. Her deep, brown eyes filled with so much thought, so much depth. And what the fuck was he thinking? Her eyes were just that – _eyes. _He had to snap out of it. "I want to apologize for acting like a brat. You were right; it's none of my business. It's just a cut, right? I don't know why I cared so much."

It _was _just a prick. It _didn't _matter. Though when she said it out loud, Edward didn't feel like it was true. He hated doubting himself. What was happening to him?

"I'm sorry, too," Edward said. "I overreacted. I shouldn't have brought up your situation."  
"You shouldn't have," Isabella agreed. "But you know … I never really thanked you for saving my life. If you hadn't shown up, I would have gone through with the suicide."

"I'm sure you would have stopped yourself without me."

Isabella shook her head. "No, I wouldn't have. So I owe you one."

Edward dug his hands in his pockets, rocking back on his heels as he thought of what to say without sounding like an asshole. "I've got work soon so I'll see you later?"

"Um, yeah," She said, like she was unsure. And then she cleared her throat, like she was more confident with her words. "Yeah, I'll see you later. I don't know, maybe I'll go see Alice or something."

"Go for it. You know, I like Alice. She hates me, but I think it's amusing since she's barely five feet tall," Edward's comment made Isabella laugh, and for a moment, he thought it was the prettiest thing he ever heard. And then he realized that he needed some air, because his mind was fucking with him. But just before he left, he asked Isabella, "Were you just about to call me Douche Master?"

Isabella stood frozen. "How did you know about that?"

Edward shrugged. "You talk in your sleep. I didn't realize that nickname was reserved for me, though."

"Look, I didn't mean to offend you. But can you blame me? You've tortured me for the majority of my high school career …"

"Isabella, chill. I'm not mad; I actually think it's hilarious. But from now on, call me Edward, okay?"

"Yeah, sure," Isabella agreed. "So what now?"

Edward looked at the time, and scratched the back of his head. "Actually, I'm kind of late for work, so … you'll be home alone until my parents get back. Unless you decide to call up Alice."

"Oh," she mumbled. He watched as her eyes cast down, looking like she was disappointed. That was weird. Edward thought she hated his guts.

"I can call in sick if you want. Just so you don't have to stay here alone."

What in the fuck? How did those words process enough to escape his mouth? The world was backwards, or maybe it was opposite day. His mind wasn't in its normal state. Edward though he hated _her _guts. It was supposed to be a mutual feeling. They only agreed to a truce, and now he was suddenly giving up work for her? He needed that money!

"Go to work … _Edward, _I can take care of myself," she said. Edward nodded and waved, not knowing what to say. He just needed to leave the house and clear his head.

_**Bella**_

This truce with him was _hard. _A lot harder than Bella expected it to be, and that was saying a lot considering she thought it would be difficult to begin with. She had to choose her words carefully, had to bite her tongue from saying things out loud when words were meant to be kept in. And now she had to call him _Edward. _It wasn't like Bella wanted to call him Douche Master to his face – actually, that was sort of a lie – but she certainly wasn't prepared for him to want her to call him by his actual name. Bella was certainly content with not completely addressing him. But now she wondered if she should let him call her _Bella, _instead of Isabella.

She was stubborn, but she didn't want to fight with him. His family was letting her stay with them, even under the circumstances. Bella didn't know how to repay them, didn't know how to show them her gratitude. The least she could do was get along with their bastard of a son, who, she realized, was somewhat more bearable than he usually was. So she would call him _Edward. _Shewould even try to call him that in her head, but she wasn't going to let him call her by her preferred name.

Even though she was the only one in the house, she was glad Edward had left. It meant she could be alone with her thoughts, could sort out her feelings and secrets. Maybe she could even get some homework done. God, Bella hated missing school. She despised being made fun of every hour of the day, but that didn't mean Bella would miss out on a lesson. Seriously, missing a lesson was like missing graduation day. Okay, not really. But a person who missed a day of school missed _a lot. _High school was nothing like middle school and elementary. High school could kick anyone's ass without consequence. But then she realized she didn't have her homework. Didn't know what she had missed. Ah, fuck. Bella didn't mind relaxing, but she didn't want to have to ask her teachers what had happened while she was gone. They would ask why she was absent, and she would have to make up some excuse. And Bella was a pitiful liar, probably couldn't even lie if the world was ending.

Damn.

Bella rose from the bed, deciding to head downstairs and clean the house. It was something she could do to repay the Cullen's. No one was home and the house was quiet, a peaceful stillness. If it was silent at her home, it meant that she should be scared. It meant that Phil was either pissed or would be expecting something spectacular. At least when the television was blasting Bella knew that he was too enthralled with the image on the screen to give a fuck about what she was doing. But here, she felt safe. Felt like the silence was tranquility, not something to fear. So Bella cleaned the kitchen in the hush sounds that surrounded her, scrubbing the counter and sweeping the floor. The living room was next, and she set the pillows on the couch so that it would be more aesthetically pleasing. Bella dusted and she wiped, and in that time realized that she was actually enjoying it.

The shrill of her cell phone made Bella take a sharp intake of breath. She wished her ribs would heal faster; it was hard to breathe because of their current state. Bella pulled the phone out of her pocket and, of course, dropped it on the floor. She groaned, wincing in pain as her sore body bent to pick it up from the cold, wooden floor.

"Hello?" Bella answered breathlessly.

"Did you fall down a flight of stairs or something? You sound strained," The voice responded. It was Alice, and even though falling down a couple of stairs would have been a lot less painful than the injuries she had gained, Bella kept quiet. "Anyways, I just wanted to know if you were up to hanging out tonight?"

"We have school tomorrow."

"So what? C'mon, Bella, we won't be out for long. I just need to get out of my house. My brother is pissing me off and if I don't get out there will be a murder story on the newspaper tomorrow morning."

Bella tittered. "You're so dramatic … but I guess I could. When and where?"

"Oh my god, thank you!" Alice laughed, though it sounded like she was cackling. An angry Pixie – that was new. "I'm thinking we meet at the Forks' Diner in about ten minutes?"

Bella walked over to the window and looked to where her car was parked. She sighed. "Do you think you could pick me up? Like at the park by my house?"

"Sure, but what happened to your fancy ride?"

"I'm not in the mood to drive today," Bella lied, badly, might she add. She tried making her lie more convincing by adding, "Besides, don't you want to show off _your _fancy ride?"

"I guess so. I'll pick you up in ten?" A loud voice in the background made Alice step away from the phone, and Bella knew this because Alice's voice had turned muffled. Her words were stifled, and Bella knew she was talking to Emmett because of the voice dynamics. A door slammed and everything was suddenly quiet. "Scratch that – I'll pick you up in five. The park, right?"

"Uh, yeah," Bella answered. "Is everything all right?"

"Don't worry about it," The roar of the engine split through the phone. "I'll see you in a bit."

Alice had hung up the phone, and Bella was stunned with what she just heard. She didn't actually _hear _anything, but she heard enough to realize that Emmett had a temper. It was expected, since he was the size of the fucking hulk. And because of him, she now only had five minutes to get to mailbox. She hurriedly put away the cleaning supplies, making sure everything that could start a fire was off. She wrote a note to who ever came home first, telling them thank you for their generosity and that she had cleaned the house. After grabbing some cash and making sure she looked approachable, Bella ran out the door. It was easy to figure out where the Cullen's left their spare key – underneath the flowerpot – so she locked the door and sprinted for the park. It wasn't a long journey, merely a minute walk from the house. But she knew that Alice drove fast, and making sure everything was in order before she left must have cost Bella time.

Bella was never really athletic, and during gym class, she didn't do much because no one would ever give her the ball or a chance. And when they did, hell happened. An excellent example was when someone passed her the volleyball. Bella didn't mean to hit Angela's head – it wasn't her fault that the whole Forks' High School was pretty much set to make her life miserable. But Bella ran as fast as she could, her boots making _click-clack _sounds along the pavement. The neighborhood park was always well kept – especially since it never stopped raining. And as she ran she saw the same playground she used to play in when she was little. Tall evergreens surrounded the metal area. It was painted in red, blue, and yellow. The monkey bars, slides, and swings still looked the same, but older – aged. And as she stood, her eyes admiring the bushes and flowers that scattered the park and framed the playground, she remembered the last time she visited it. It was so long ago; Bella must have been seven. So young … so scared.

She had packed a blanket, an extra pair of clothes, and a peanut butter and jelly sandwich into her Barbie themed backpack. The one with pink glitter and purple zippers. It was August, and Bella needed to leave. She didn't mean to upset her dad, didn't mean to break his watch. She was merely admiring the silver plated Rolex that sat on his night table. But Bella was clumsy, and falling wasn't part of the plan. Her dad was angry, his face was beet red and his eyes were horrific. Bella packed her things and ran to the park, by the playground her mom always used to take her. She camped underneath the slide. The air was misty, the cold water stuck to her skin.

Bella only got a few minutes of sleep before she felt a tug on her hair. It was her dad, and he was even scarier than he was before. She had never seen him so malevolent before. He hit her arm when they got back home. Bella couldn't even cry because he would hit her again if she did. After that night, Bella knew that her dad was someone to fear.

"Bella!" Someone yelled, followed with the _honk _of a car. Her mind snapped out of her thoughts, brought her back to reality. Bella blinked once at the playground before walking away. The hairs on the back of her neck were standing on end as she gaited towards the Mercedes. Bella waved weakly at Alice, who seemed to have gotten over her argument with her brother in the five minutes it took her to get here.

The car was warm; the change of air from the foggy park was distinct from the heated atmosphere in the car. Bella shivered, she didn't even realize she forgot to put on a jacket in her haste. She looked back at the playground, noticing how small it looked from afar, how insignificant it seemed to be as it was set in the middle of the neighborhood park.

"You okay?" Alice asked as she began to pull away from the curb.

"Yeah," Bella lied. "What about you?"

Alice made a left turn, exiting the neighborhood. "I'm fine, it's my brother who I'm worried about," Alice then smiled, and turned up the music. "But I left my house to escape the madness, and we're going to have fun."

Bella laughed nervously. "It's just the diner – nothing too exciting."

"Anything can happen, Bella. And besides – I've never even been to the place yet. So it will be exciting for me."

"Okay," Bella said, turning the music up even louder. "Then let's have our own fun."

"That's the spirit!" Alice cheered.

And as Alice sang along to Ke$ha's, _Blow_, Bella did too. She needed to forget what she had reminisced not too long ago, because it was proof that Phil had always given hints that he wasn't her father. There had always been signs that him and Renee were hiding something.

She was just too stupid and naïve to realize it ten years later.

_**Edward**_

Edward hated working at Forks' Diner sometimes. While there were really nice customers, and hot customers, there were always the ones who never seemed pleased. Either there wasn't enough ice in their drink or there wasn't enough ketchup in the bottle, some were just amazingly picky. If he weren't getting paid Edward would have flipped the table over and squirted mustard on their faces. Fucking customers – couldn't let a seventeen-year-old boy wait tables in peace.

"Table five says their broccoli isn't cooked enough," Edward said monotonously to the cook, Jack.

Jack had been the cook at Forks' Diner for as long as he could remember. He was probably in his fifties by now. His dark, brown hair was beginning to grey, and he had laugh lines in the corner of his eyes. Jack grew up in New York, but moved to Forks when he married his wife, Cheryl. Their son moved back to New York while the married couple resided in town. Edward couldn't imagine moving from such a huge city to a small town, and have the patience to stay in it for so long. But Jack was a good friend of Carlisle, and was the main reason he had gotten the job at the diner.

"How the hell do they want their broccoli, over cooked?" Jack scoffed, taking the plate from Edward. "I tell you, customers these days watch too many episodes of _Master Chef. _This is a local diner for heaven's sake – not Chef Ramsey's gospel choir."

Edward chuckled. "Just make sure they're not too soggy, or else _I_ have to face the hell hole."

"I wish my son was as fun as you. But _no, _he wanted to be a journalist," Jack shook his head.

"You flatter me, Jack. And as much as I love getting compliments, I have to get back to waiting tables."

"Try not to shoot our customers, okay?"

"Gotcha."

"And, Edward?"

"Yeah?" Edward said as he picked up a plate of food.

Jack smirked. "Don't flirt with all of our female customers – they might not come back once they've realized they're not the only one's who got your attention."

Edward rolled his eyes. "_Gotcha._"

It wasn't like Edward flirted on purpose – it just came naturally. Girls were just attracted to him; it wasn't his fault. And even so, he wasn't a man whore. He only got it in once and it was a complete mistake. Hell, he wasn't even coherent when it happened. His first time was a blur; the only reason he knew he had done it was because Rosalie told him what went down at the party that night. He trusted her more than anything, but even so … he still couldn't believe what happened. And whom it happened with.

Luckily, he was able to get his mind off of it because the customers were suddenly friendly. Given, it was the prime time for families to come out and eat, so that meant less catty couples and more PG demands. He earned better tips and time seemed to go by quickly. When he went back to the kitchen to receive more plates, he saw that he only two and a half hours left. He would be home by nine – maybe even later. Awe shit. He hadn't even started on his Biology homework. Fuck life …

"Edward," Tanya, the hostess with bright blond hair and bad skin, said to him. "Party of three – your section."  
"Another one, T?" Edward groaned. "I'm already doing five tables."

"You should be thanking me. They're really good with tips."

"How so?"

Tanya nodded her head toward the table. There were three girls and they were all hot. "Just lay the charm and you're guaranteed to get a good amount of cash."

Edward nodded, giving her a pat on the shoulder. "You're awesome, T."

She sighed. "I know."

Edward knew that Tanya had a crush on him. She was a smart girl with bright blue eyes and hair than shone. Her skin could have used more Proactiv but Edward wasn't as superficial as some people thought. Tanya was energetic and sweet, but Edward didn't share the same feelings for her. She was fourteen, and a good friend. He knew her crush was only slight, and that she would move on as soon as she found another boy to be in her life.

But luckily, her crush on him meant that she was always looking out for him at work. He strode to the table where the girls sat, giving them his award winning smile. The minute he stood in front of them, the girls went from chatty to silent to flirty. It was almost too easy. He could hear the _cha-ching _in his head as he gathered their orders. And when they had left, their numbers piled on top of the counter, he took the tips and kept the little pieces of paper. The two blondes were cute, but the brunette was prettier. He would think about that one later.

"Thanks, T," Edward gave Tanya ten dollars in gratitude, which was no problem since the tip was overly generous. "You were right about them being good with tips."

Tanya took the cash and slid it into her pocket. "No problem. Oh, and you have another table in your section. Table seven."

Edward glanced at the clock – an hour and a half left to go. "Okay, sounds good."

Except that when he approached table seven, he knew that Tanya had gotten it wrong about these customers. They wouldn't be fooled by his charm. Hell, he probably wouldn't even get tips from them.

Fuck life.

_**Bella**_

Alice had lent Bella her leather jacket. She was amazed they were the same size, since the girl was so small. Bella had declined at first, but Alice had all but forced it down her throat. Saying shit like she didn't want her to miss school again for being sick, and that it would match what she was wearing. Bella agreed that the jacket looked good, it had ruched sleeves and ended to her waist. It made her floral shirt look edgier, and chunkier with the scarf she had been wearing earlier. Fashion was difficult – there were too many things to think about. She was glad she had Alice by her side.

The only thing she didn't agree with was when Alice said she would be alone without Bella at school. Alice was carefree and full of life. Stylish and trendy. Pretty and charismatic. She could easily find someone else to hang out with if Bella wasn't there. The girl still had the chance to escape from Bella. Yet, she was here with her. Laughing and smiling with her, talking with ease to Bella. After getting to know Alice for a bit, Bella found that she, herself, was becoming looser about things. She was coming to terms with doing stuff with other people and learning to have fun for once in her life. Something she didn't think she would have until she left the damn town and ultimately left her life.

The two girls were seated in booth by the window – it was beginning to rain outside. The Forks diner was nothing but ordinary. The walls were wooden and the floors a deep green colored carpet. The tables were wood as well, the seats with red padding. A TV was hung in the corner opposite the girls – a baseball game was playing – and another was located behind them. It was clearly a family restaurant. There was no bar and the only beer they had was light. Forks' Diner was a common place for teenagers to chill after school, since no one really wanted to go all the way to Port Angeles on a school night. That's why she was surprised that there was barely anyone she knew at the restaurant. Not that she minded – she couldn't stand her classmates.

"I'm thinking a cheeseburger," Alice said into the menu. "I feel like being a fat ass today. What are you getting?"

Bella didn't need to look into the menu – she knew what she wanted. "I'm getting the spaghetti," She had gotten the same thing from the diner ever since she was twelve, and she wasn't going to switch favorites now. "And maybe even a milkshake."

"Yum! I'll get a milkshake, too," Alice scanned the restaurant before saying, "I don't see many people I know here – what does the youth of Forks do on Sunday nights?"

Bella was going to answer when a familiar voice interrupted, "Probably doing that stupid biology assignment Mr. Barnes gave out."

She looked up hesitantly, only to be met with her housemate's face. Edward smirked at her. He was joking about the assignment, trying to keep the truce between them. Otherwise, he would have asked someone else to take over this table. And another thing – when did the loser start working at the diner?

"Are you sure about that?" Alice asked sweetly. "Maybe they're not here because they know you're working tonight. No one wants to be served by a person whose hair resembles a mop."

That comment made Edward laugh and run a hand through his messy hair, which, now that she thought about it, really did look like a mop. Bella wanted to laugh, but decided to swallow her words. She had to remember their truce, had to remember their agreement. Besides, he hadn't done anything yet to piss her off. So far, besides the whole bleeding finger incident and the breakfast situation, they had been doing pretty well.

"What can I get for you, Brandon?" He asked Alice, taking out his notepad and pen.

Alice clicked her tongue. "A cheeseburger with a salad. Try not to mess it up, _Cullen._"

Douche … _Edward _wrote down Alice's order before turning to Bella. "And for you?"

Bella felt nervous under his gaze, like he was scrutinizing her. She had to take a deep breath before saying, "Spaghetti – Jack knows how I like it done. And a strawberry milkshake."

"Oh, make that two milkshakes," Alice piped in.

"Okay," Edward mumbled as he scribbled into his notepad. "I'll be back with your milkshakes in a few."

"Don't hurry," Alice mumbled.

Bella would have smiled at her comment, but Edward's expression distracted her. He smiled at her … fucking _smiled. _Like they were friends or some shit. It was one of his crooked ass grins and Bella didn't know how to react to it. She had seen him give that smile to other people, other girls, and thought it was the ugliest, stupidest smile known to man. But now that he had given her that smile, Bella didn't know what to think. It didn't seem so moronic anymore; that smile didn't seem to belong to Douche Master anymore. It was almost like that crooked smile of his was just another characteristic that defined Edward …

And Bella was turning crazy. Clearly.

"Why is he so nice all of a sudden?" Alice asked.

Bella shrugged. "Maybe because he's working."

"Well it's just a charade – I'm pretty sure the a bastard inside is just dying to come out."

Bella kept quiet – she didn't know how to respond to Alice's statement. Yeah, Edward was a complete asshole and hated her … but now she wasn't so sure. He had been kind to her lately, and it didn't seem like he hated her all that much. But that didn't change how _she _felt about _him. _Maybe there was more than met the eye with the guy. However, one thing was for sure – she wasn't sure what the hell was going on. But maybe, just maybe, Edward wasn't such a bad guy after all.

**x x x x x x**

The spaghetti was amazing – as per usual. The flavor lingered in her mouth, her appetite satiated and fulfilled. And as Bella looked at Alice, she didn't know if the girl was really hungry or just enjoying her food. She looked like she was eating as if it was her last day to live, and Bella couldn't help but giggle.

"What are you laughing about?" Alice looked up from her plate, licking her fingers.

"I was just wondering if you were dying of starvation or if you liked your burger."

She glared at Bella playfully, flipping her off. "You're a bitch."

Bella sighed. "And proud of it."

"I knew there was a reason I liked you," Alice laughed.

Edward took their plates from the table, not saying a word. He didn't need to, or else Alice would have said something snappy. As he retrieved Bella's empty plate, she caught a whiff of his cologne – the same autumn scent. It was her favorite aroma, and the fact that Dou … _Edward _wore that smell was almost baffling. How could she like a smell that Edward possessed? And just to make her more confused, he gave her another one of his smiles before leaving. God. Now she didn't know if he was doing that to keep the truce or if he wanted a good tip.

The girls paid their separate bills when they decided to call it a night. The rain had stopped and Alice had homework to do. Bella wasn't excited to go to school tomorrow and receive double the stack of assignments since she missed Friday. Bella didn't like to be a lazy person, but she was prone to doing things as simple as possible. And more homework – that wasn't simple. That was a lot of work!

Bella was putting on Alice's jacket when she felt her friend tapping her shoulder. "Hey! Isn't that the guy who gave you his number in Port Angeles?"

"What are you talking about?" Bella glanced up from the sleeves the jacket towards the entry of the diner. "Oh, shit."

Brant was there, clad in jeans and a black v-neck shirt underneath an unbuttoned pea coat. He must have been caught in the rain, because his chestnut hair was now a darker brown, his skin shiny with water. He was so cute, and Bella had forgotten about him. Granted, she probably wouldn't have called him, but she never thought she would see him again. So what did Bella do? She grabbed Alice and ducked her head. Alice didn't ask her what was going on, maybe because she understood that Bella didn't want to talk to Brant. Didn't want to act like a complete idiot and ultimately embarrass herself in front of an extremely hot guy. But they didn't even get a few steps away from their table before he saw her.

"Hey, Bella!"

Bella cursed.

"Okay, Bella – it's go time. Did you ever call him?" Alice whispered.

"No. I completely forgot about him."

Alice nodded. "Then just tell him that you don't believe in girls being the first to call, and that if you were meant to meet again you would."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Bella wondered. She glanced back at Brant – he was walking towards them now.

"Trust me," Alice told her. "You'll score major points with him!"

"I don't want to score points, Alice."

"_Just trust me. _He's cute and he seems nice."

Bella shook her head. "Alice …"

"Bella …" She copied with the same tone. "I love you, and you're going to thank me for this. Just repeat what I told you to say and smile."

"Are you sure about –"

"Bella," Brant said. She could feel his presence. He was smiling at her, shaking his wet hair. Ugh. He was so adorable. "I was a little disappointed when I didn't get your call."

Bella looked away from Brant, more towards the corner of the room. "Um," She was brought back to life when Alice nudged her. "I'm not the kind of girl who calls first. And I'm a firm believer that if we were meant to meet again, we would."

Brant then looked at Bella through his eyelashes. His eyes were a different shade of purple than the last time she saw him. They resembled lavenders – soft and gentle. "And here we are," He said smoothly.

"Yeah … here we are," Bella replied. She couldn't have felt more awkward. She wasn't the best flirt. Hell, she never even got the chance to practice because all the guys in Forks only saw her as the Duck – not to mention they were class 'A' bastards.

"Do you want to sit? It would be nice if I didn't look like a loner in a family restaurant," Brant suggested.

"I'd love to, but I have to get started on that Biology assignment Edward was talking about," Alice shrugged. "But you can stay if you want, Bella."

"But you're my ride, Alice," Bella reminded her.

"I could drive you home, if you want," Brant said.

"See, Bella? Problem solved. So I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I guess so." Ah, fuck. There was no way she could get out of this mess.

When Brant and Bella headed to the table she glanced back at Alice, who gave her a thumbs up. Bella glared and flipped her off when Brant wasn't looking. She didn't know what to do around guys. Flirting was alien to her, and now Alice had let Bella crash right into the middle of it. Bella didn't know how to play the game, and she really hoped she didn't mess up the rules. Brant was so good looking, and the fact that he had shown interest in her must have accounted for something.

_Dear God. Please don't let me fuck this up._

"I didn't know you lived in Forks," Bella said, starting the conversation. It was now or never.

"I don't," Brant replied, making Bella want to slap herself. "I live in Port Angeles, but I was here with my parents to visit some family."  
Bella quirked a brow. "And your family is going to meet you here or …"

Brant shook his head, his hair still a little wet. "No. My parents are at my aunt and uncle's place still. But my cousin has a date tonight with her boyfriend so I decided to kill some time until it was time to go back," He then smirked at Bella. "And it was a good thing I chose to come here."

She felt herself blush under his gaze. "Yeah, I guess it _was_ a good thing you came here."

In that moment, after those words had left her mouth, Brant and Bella just stared at each other. His expression was so soft, so kind. Bella could feel her cheeks turn crimson, and yet, she couldn't look away. Maybe Alice was right – maybe Bella did have some game. The clearing of someone's throat broke their trance. Bella immediately looked away, a little embarrassed that she had let Brant observe her for so long. But when she looked at her waiter's expression, which was the complete opposite of Brant's, Bella grinned.

_Keep the truce, Bella._

"Hey, Edward," She greeted.

Edward didn't seem to exchange the same tone. "Hey," He took out his notepad and flipped it open forcefully. "Can I get you anything?"

Brant ordered, and Bella watched as Edward wrote. He seemed to write so hard that the pen could have gone right through. Bella didn't know what his problem was, but she guessed that it was because something had happened while he was working. They both agreed to keep the peace between them, so she didn't see why he would suddenly want to break it now. She shrugged it off when he stalked away to go to his other customers.

And as time went by, Bella really enjoyed her conversation with Brant. But she couldn't help but feel someone was watching her.

**x x x x x x**

"I can_not_ believe you watch _Hellcats,_" Bella laughed.

Brant shrugged, a smile on his face displaying his perfect set of teeth. "What can I say? They're cheerleaders with actual brains … it's the ultimate show."

Bella rolled her eyes. "You're such a guy, you know that?"

"That may be so, but I'm a guy who likes girls with class."

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah. That's why I like you, Bella. You're so much different from every girl. You carry yourself well. It's refreshing."

Bella bit her lip. "It's those kind of words that get you good points with a girl."

"Is it working on you?"

"Maybe."

Brant laughed and grabbed Bella's hand from the table. His hands were smooth and warm. Bella really was having a good time. Edward then came by and gave them two glasses of water and napkins. She didn't know why they needed napkins – it was only water. Maybe it was because he knew how clumsy she was and that she could possibly spill the glass. But as Bella examined the napkin closer, she realized that there was actual writing inside. Brant continued to talk about his life in Port Angeles while Bella brought the napkin under the table to read it.

_Meet me outside the diner. Now._

Bella felt her mouth frown. Was something wrong with Edward? Was there an emergency? She folded the napkin and stuffed it into the pocket of the leather jacket. "I'll be back, " She told Brant. "I just need some air."

She left the table and walked outside with haste. The air was wet, a frosty kind of atmosphere with a fresh pine scent. Bella looked around for Edward, scanning the benches and the parking lot before she finally found him. He was leaning against the hood of his car, his hands stuffed in his pockets and his ankles crossed. Even in the dark the color of his hair was so distinct. Bella ran towards him, and when he saw her coming, he stood up right.

"Is something wrong?" She asked. "Your note was so random."

"Kind of like that guy you're with," Edward replied monotonously. He wouldn't look at her.

Bella creased her brows. "What does Brant have do with anything?"

"Did you just meet this guy? He could be dangerous!"

"Are you serious?" Bella took her hands out of her pockets. "Look, I've met Brant before, but I didn't really know him until tonight. And for your information, he isn't dangerous at all. He's sweet and considerate. He doesn't jump to conclusions like some people."

Edward scoffed. "_I'm_ jumping to conclusions? How?"

"Edward! You give me a note to meet you out here to tell me that you think Brant is some kind of hazard. You don't even know the guy."

"I'm not judging, Isabella. It's merely my gut telling me something."

"Well you can tell your gut that it's wrong," Bella said, turning back towards the diner.

"I don't think you should see him anymore," She heard Edward say. That stopped her in her tracks. Bella couldn't believe he just said that.

"Are you fucking kidding me, Edward?" Bella yelled.

Edward nodded. "As long as you're staying with my family I don't want you to be in trouble. I don't think you realize how sensitive you are right now – you almost committed suicide."  
"Oh my God," Bella mumbled. "Stop putting that shit on me! It was a mistake and a spur of the moment thing, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed or psycho. Get off my back."

"Look," Edward said. "I don't want to break our truce, but I just wanted to let you know how I felt. You can still see him. But if he hurts you, you'll see that I was right."

Bella shook her head and stepped away from Edward. She was beyond pissed at him. Who was he to tell her who she could hang out with, who she could like. Until a couple of days ago, they hated each other. Just because they had some sort of understanding didn't give him the right to tell her what was right and wrong. She practically raised herself – she could tell what was a good and bad choice.

So Bella made another good choice. "As far as I'm concerned, Edward. Our truce is over. And it never should have begun in the first place."

As Bella left, all she could think was how stupid she was to believe that there was an actual _person _inside that egotistical front of his. But she was right all along – Edward Cullen was an asshole and would always be one.

* * *

**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

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**Okay, I know it's literally been a month and a day since I last updated. I'm really sorry. I've been going through a lot this past month, and right now. I really needed to focus on myself. If any of you follow me on Tumblr you've probably seen my posts - not the ones I reblog - of me ranting and such. Yeah. It really sucks to be sixteen sometimes. I have to keep reminding myself that I'm not perfect and that all anyone expects from me is to try my absolute hardest. I've been trying to deal with my stress through yoga, and for the most part it has been working. So, I'm sorry. Please don't kill me. It felt really good to write again. This story is so much fun to write.**

**School ends in three weeks, and then there's finals. During the summer you can expect more frequent updates. The next chapter definitely will not take a month to be updated, I can promise you that. But just know that I am dealing with a lot right now ...**

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**Karina**

**p.s: Sorry my a/n sounded kind of emo. I promise i still laugh a whole a lot and make jokes and what not. I still think J Biebs is amazing and shopping is good therapy. I haven't given into the dark side. No matter how amazing their cookies are (see what I did there? Holy shit I make myself laugh. Haha).**


	10. Chapter Ten: Haunt

_Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own five pairs of feather earrings (which are my current obsession!)_

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Chapter Ten: Haunt

_**Bella's POV**_

Days had gone by since the incident at Fork's Diner. Hours seemed so monotone that Bella felt like each day was just repeating itself over and over and over. She woke up, got dressed for school, ate breakfast, thanked Mrs. Cullen for the food and left. She would come back, eat dinner, thank Mr. and Mrs. Cullen for their hospitality, do homework and sleep. But everyday something was different, and that one thing was Edward. One day they would make eye contact, and the next they wouldn't. He would ask her simple questions like, _do you want an apple _to not saying anything at all. However, one thing was for sure – Bella was still overly pissed at Edward, and he most definitely knew it.

Three knocks on the door paused Bella from applying lip-gloss. In the mirror she saw Esme's petit frame, her face solemn and hands folded in front of her.

"Do you mind if I come in?" She asked.

Bella shook her head. "No, not at all. It is _your house_."

Through the mirror, Bella watched as Esme tentatively walked in. She didn't know what to expect. Esme's face was so calm; the woman could have been thinking just about anything without a person suspecting her. But Bella was observant; she had to be in the Swan House. She had to learn to watch how people acted, how they reacted. If she didn't she could have been in a much worse situation.

"What's on your mind?" Bella wondered aloud, leaning against the vanity so that she was facing Esme. Her voice was steady, but on the inside she was freaking the fuck out. Maybe the Cullen's wanted her to leave, thought it would be best for her to tell the police or some shit. She couldn't, not yet. She would gladly leave, but she needed time to collect herself before confronting the authorities. She hadn't even found anything about Charles Garland! How the fuck did Esme keep her face so still? Bella felt like her own expression went from serene to anxious in ten seconds.

"I'm sorry if my Edward hurt your feelings."

_Huh? What the fuck?_

"Um … what?"

Esme patted the space beside her. Bella sat hesitantly. "I know my son hasn't treated you the best for a long time, and I apologize for that. That's not how we raised him."

Bella was taken back. She didn't even know Esme was aware of what Bella had been through at school. She didn't tell her that part of the pain in her life. It was apparent that Esme was observant as well. "Thank you, Esme," Bella nodded. "I appreciate that. But honestly, his words don't really mean much to me anymore. It doesn't phase me. I've learned to ignore it."

"I'm glad. But you've been through things in your life that shouldn't ever see the light of day. If Edward knew that, he would feel so guilty and – "

"If it's okay with you, Esme, I'd prefer it if he didn't know about my home life," Bella said.

Esme stared at her for a long time before replying, "Of course, sweetie." Bella watched as Esme stood up from the bed, making her way towards the door. But just before she walked out, she turned. "The thing about Edward is that he is protective over the people he cares about. He doesn't realize it, but sometimes he takes it a little too far. And the more he cares for the person, the more protective he is."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"I just thought I should let you know, that's all."

Bella found herself speechless as Esme retreated from the room. She was now staring at herself in the mirror, where not too long ago she thought she had Edward figured out. As she registered Esme's information, Bella knew that she was far from knowing who he was. Things weren't as consistent as she thought them to be, and Bella found that she could be in a deeper obstacle than what she was in before. The farther she was from her family, the closer she became to the Cullen's. And the fonder she became of her neighbor's family, the more confused she was about their son. The boy with mutant green eyes and hair that seemed to glow didn't seem as malicious as he once did. Bella couldn't find it within her to call him Douche Master as easily as she once did. No matter how many times she convinced herself that the name truly suited him, it just didn't feel right anymore. And she didn't fucking know why.

It was the way he seemed to truly and genuinely try to keep the truce between them, did she realize that things between them started to change. It was how the sun's light hit his face did she see that he was beautiful. It was when he helped her hide her black eye did she notice he was gentle. It was when he found her in the woods, so cold and broken, did Bella begin to trust him. And it was when Edward unrightfully told her to stay away from Brant did she remember why she hated him. But did Bella really hate him? In the span of so many days, did her feelings toward him suddenly switch? Not to mention Esme had to tell her that Edward was protective over the people he cared for. Did that mean that he cared for Bella, and didn't want her to get hurt?

No, that was not it. Edward had made it perfectly clear over the years that he simply despised Bella. And she _still _didn't know why he hated her so much. Bella didn't care if he _did _try to make it up to her by trying to show kindness to her, and she was stupid enough to believe his bullshit. Bella was hurt that she had given him enough trust to accept the truce, only for him to become an imbecile and ruin it.

Bella let out a frustrated huff and grabbed her backpack and cell phone. Alice left her ten text messages, all surrounding the same topic: the events of what happened after the pixie had left. She had been gone for awhile, some sort of fever, and Bella didn't feel like telling her that it would have been a lot better had Edward not intervened. Things were going so well between her and Brant, and damn it, he was cute. But after Edward told her that he didn't trust Brant, Bella couldn't help but feel like maybe he was right. Basically, her night was ruined because the dip shit had put ideas in her head that were never there before. Brant was oblivious, and that made Bella feel like she was a better actress than she had given herself credit for. But still … the night could have gone so much better.

"Good morning, Bella," Carlisle's warm voice greeted as she reached the bottom of the stairs. "How was your rest?"

"It was great, thank you," Bella smiled. She wasn't sure how many times she had thanked the Cullen's for their hospitality, and she was sure it was beginning to get old. But how else could she have repaid them?

Carlisle, like the charming and good-looking man he was, grinned. "I'm glad to hear that."

Once Carlisle had left for work, Bella made her way to the kitchen. The sound of sizzling made Bella feel guilty. Esme was making bacon and eggs for breakfast. "Do you need any help, Esme?" Bella asked. She wasn't used to people making her breakfast every single day. Bella usually had a piece of toast and a banana and was good to go. She didn't want Esme to think that she was taking advantage of her.

"I'm fine, dear. Why don't you just sit down and relax," Esme said pleasantly.

Ah, fuck. Those words made Bella feel even guiltier. She couldn't simply _sit down and relax _while she watched Esme make her food. It didn't feel right to her. And if she ever did that in her own house, Phil would slap her for being a snobby little brat.

"Can I at least help with dishes?" Esme laughed, but nodded. Bella felt a little better knowing that she wasn't just sitting around. It wasn't in her nature to let others do things for her. She grew up independent, but it was hard to be so in a house where parents actually cared about children.

"You know, Bella. I really am fine with doing everything in the kitchen. You don't need to help me with anything," Esme said as she cracked an egg over the pan.

"I know, and while I appreciate it, I'd rather do something to help you in any way. You've done so much for me."

"Darling, that's because you're our guest. And in this house, guests are treated like royalty."

Bella chuckled. She was far from royalty. "In my house, if I didn't do something around the house, Phil would have beaten me up for it."

"What do you mean?"

"He would have …" Bella took a deep breath, trying to prevent her voice from shaking. "He would have slapped me, kicked me, thrown me against the wall. He would have called me names or lock me in the basement with no light."

She was staring at her hands as she said this. It was harder to say aloud than in her mind because when it was actually said … it felt more real. Those things really did happen, but she protected herself by not telling anyone. Bella felt exposed. But she felt Esme's warm embrace and she knew that even though her fears and her pain was sewed on her sleeve, there _were_ some good people in the world.

"I'm so sorry, Bella," Esme whispered. "I cannot imagine what you have been through. And I'm sorry that we only found out about it now."

"It's okay, Esme,"

"No, it's not. Bella, darling, I really do think you should tell the police …"

Bella pulled away from the hug, holding Esme at least arms length away. "We can't … I mean, _I _can't. Not yet, at least."

Esme stared at Bella before hesitantly nodding. "Okay. But until then you're staying with us. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I knew you got hit one more time."

"Deal," Bella agreed. After she had eaten her breakfast and cleaned the dishes, Bella realized that something was missing. "Where's Edward?"

"He had to pick up Rosalie since her car is in the shop."

"Wouldn't her boyfriend do it for her?"

"Probably, but Rosalie and Edward are such good friends and I know they haven't really seen each other lately because of said boyfriend."

Bella nodded aimlessly, but it still bothered her. Rosalie had a senior boyfriend who was completely smitten with her. Alice told Bella that Emmett would leave the house to burn if Rosalie needed him at all. Though the girl was probably exaggerating, Bella didn't deny that Emmett was obsessed with the Bitch. Why? She had no freaking clue. So it just didn't make sense that Rosalie would call Edward up when she had her boyfriend wrapped around her manicured finger.

One look at the time made Bella _almost _curse out loud. "Ugh, I have to go or else I'm going to be late."

Bella grabbed her backpack and was almost out the door when Esme said, "I'll drive you."

"You don't have to, Esme. I can take the bus."

"I'm pretty sure you could, but Edward forgot something really important and I need to get it to him."

"What is it? I have no problem getting it to him," Bella offered, even though she didn't want to do it. If possible, she would love to avoid him at all costs. But Esme made breakfast, so it was the least Bella could do.

"I don't think Edward would like it if I gave it to you," Esme said, and even though it shouldn't have hurt Bella, it did. Did he really hate her that much? And worse, why the fuck did she care? "Ready to go?"

Bella was pulled out of her reverie. "Huh? Oh, um, yeah … let's go."

Just as Bella stepped through the front door, thinking that Esme was right behind her, she saw that the petit woman was still in the kitchen. She watched as Esme opened a cabinet and pulled out a small black kit. Bella wondered what was inside, because she knew that the cabinet it was pulled out from was the medicine cabinet. However, as curious as Bella was, she decided not to ask. It was not her place to wonder, especially if Esme wasn't comfortable talking about her health. But the whole ride to school, all Bella could think of was what was so important that Esme had to give to Edward, and why Bella couldn't deliver it herself. Maybe it was his lunch or even his homework, or some shit.

**x x x x x x**

Bella didn't get to see what Esme had for her asshole of a son because the minute she stepped out of the car, an eager Alice grabbed her by the arm and dragged her away.

"We only have five minutes before class starts, tell me everything!"

Bella tried to squirm out of her grasp. "Ow, Alice. You're hurting my arm."

"Oh, sorry," Alice said as she released her arm. "I got a little excited. That fucking fever seemed to never go away. But seriously – what happened after I left?"

"Nothing really," Bella shrugged. "We talked and then he drove me home."

"And then he …"

"Alice, nothing happened. He's cute, but seriously. I don't know why you're so hung up on him pursuing me."

"I'm sorry. It's just that you're my friend and I want you to be happy."

Bella smiled and gave Alice a hug. "You're a good friend."

Alice returned the hug, but didn't say anything. Bella wasn't sure if Alice didn't hear her, or just didn't know what to say. But when she heard Alice murmur something, though it was too muffled to comprehend, Bella had a feeling Alice was struggling. With what, Bella was unsure of.

"Oh, I have your jacket," Bella said as they split, giving her the leather jacket. "You seriously saved me from frost bite."

Alice chuckled. "It's no problem," She stuffed it in her purse, and as she slung the designer bag over her shoulder she asked, "Who's car did you come out of this morning? I didn't recognize the driver."

"Esme Cullen."

"As in …"

"Yes. Edward's mom."

"Can I ask why you got in the car of that bastard's mom?"

"She had to give the guy something and she offered me a ride. The Cullen's are my neighbors, and Esme is really nice." There. It wasn't a lie, so hopefully it sounded sincere.

Alice tapped her chin. "How is it possible that the mom of the devil's spawn is kind?"

"I wouldn't call him the devil's spawn," Bella laughed. "Maybe an egotistical jackass."

"Ha! That's true! And besides," Alice paused, her eyes narrowing. "The devil's spawn is reserved for _her._"

Bella didn't have to look to know whom Alice was talking about. To Alice, Rosalie was the worst thing that could ever happen on the planet. She made it clear that she didn't know why her brother was dating such a bitch. Alice had said that Emmett was a nice guy and deserved better, but Bella wouldn't know. Ever since the McCarty Family moved to Forks' it was like Emmett hated Bella. A person hating Bella without even getting to know her was nothing new, but Bella had a feeling that Rosalie had a part of it.

"Alice, calm down," Bella said. The girl was getting so revved up about the thought of Rosalie that Bella could practically see fire coming out of her eyes. "How did you get to school?"

"My brother drove today, why?"

If Emmett drove today then Rosalie could have gotten a ride with him. Why did she need Edward all of a sudden? And why the fuck was she _still _caring? "Nothing. It's just that Esme told me that Rosalie got a ride with Edward. I knew that she and Emmett were kind of like a thing so …"

"Huh … that is weird," Alice mumbled, her brows creasing.

Bella tried to shrug it off and stop obsessing over the whole thing and said, "It's not even a big deal. I mean, they're best friends right? They have to hang out some time."

"Yeah, you're right," Alice agreed. But Bella knew that Alice didn't mean those words. Alice was thinking of something else.

When school started and the two departed ways, Bella could tell that Alice was still contemplating something. Did what she say about Rosalie riding with Edward make her stir and idea? Bella was curious. She wondered what Alice was trying to figure out, and she wanted to know if it was because of the Blonde Bitch. She would just have to ask her during lunch.

**x x x x x x**

It was disappointing that Alice wouldn't tell Bella what she had been thinking. Bella had been anxious all morning, not even paying attention in class, waiting for what her friend had to reveal. But she didn't spill, didn't even give a peak. She said that it was nothing. And though Bella thought it was a bunch of crap, Alice was smart enough to say that if Bella wasn't going to say anything about Brant, then she wasn't saying anything about her earlier thoughts. Damn that pixie. However, Bella let it go. She had told everything about Brant to Alice. She didn't tell her about Edward because what happened was ridiculous and done with. It was something that no one needed to concern themselves with. Maybe Alice's thoughts weren't that important either and as curious and nosy as Bella was, she was going to let her be.

It wasn't until lunch ended did Bella realize that she was in trouble. She had been so consumed with what Alice was thinking that she forgot about what the afternoon held for her. She had been dreading this day for a while, trying to conjure ideas of ways to skip creative writing class. Bella should have known that Mrs. Anderson would have the class taking a break from poetry to have them working on the collaboration project. It wouldn't have been so bad if she wasn't partners with Edward, and it would have been a lot better if his idea wasn't so fucking good, because now she had so many ideas for their assignment. But she actually had to talk about it _with _him. Bella was annoyed of him and hated the thoughts of having an actual conversation with him after so long, but she didn't want to fail the class. Besides, maybe Edward will be bearable in class –

"Watch where you're going, Daisy," Rosalie snapped as her shoulder bumped into Bella.

She could hear Rosalie laughing, and just as she was about to fight back, she forgot what she was going to say. There, beside the blonde bimbo, was Edward. He wasn't laughing with his best friend … he was just staring at her. At Bella. For a moment, Bella could see actual concern in his expression. But she snapped out of the thought, crumpled it and chucked it away. There was no way in hell that Douche Master … Edward … whatever the fuck his name was, actually cared if she was okay. Bella shook her head and walked away, not even listening to Rosalie's calling after her in mockery. And when she couldn't hear her laughter anymore, Bella ran to class, fighting the tears that wanted to escape so badly.

The thing was, she wasn't even upset about Rosalie's silly nickname or her cruel cackling. No, she was on the verge of tears because of Edward. The way he stared at her was so intense. He held that concerned expression for so long. Bella didn't know what he was thinking. The thought of what was going through his mind as his dear friend guffawed at his current roommate made her nervous for some reason. Bella didn't want to feel like that. She didn't want what Edward thought of her to affect her, but for some reason _it did. _She hated feeling that way, especially since his opinions never mattered to her before. Why the fuck did it matter now?

Bella sat down heavy, like all the conflicts of the world were resting on her lap. It made her nauseous and she was going to put her head on her desk. But then Edward came in, just before the bell like he always did, and Bella sat up taller and took a deep breath. She wanted to show him that he didn't even phase her, even if it was completely untrue.

"I'm sure you're all excited to work on your projects," Mrs. Anderson announced as Edward took his seat beside Bella. She wanted to scoff just to piss him off. But for some reason she didn't. "Now remember, no fooling around. Work hard and make sure you are working with your partner. There's a reason I put you guys in pairs, I didn't do it just for my own amusement …"

_Oh, you didn't? I thought you loved watching Edward and I battle it out most of the time …_

"You have the entire class to work on this, good luck."

The class started to break into their groups. Papers shuffled, chairs screeched on the linoleum floor, and murmurs began. Bella had a feeling that she and Edward were the only group who hadn't moved an inch. She was tapping her foot to an imaginary beat, and from the corner of her eye she could see Edward drumming his pencil on his notebook. It was more than awkward. It was _beyond_ fucking awkward.

"I guess we better get started," Bella sighed. "Or else Mrs. Anderson will drop kick our asses."

Bella started to move her desk closer to Edward when he said, "I'm sorry about Rose."

"Please, like you actually care," She scoffed.

"I-I do," Edward stuttered. Bella had never heard him stutter before. Did she make him nervous? "And I really _am_ sorry. Rose doesn't know when to stop …"

"Oh, you mean like _you_? Because the last I remember, Edward, you were the one who ridiculed me more that Angela or Rosalie or anyone else in this whole entire school."

"That's because I didn't really know you."

"And you think you know me now?" Bella rolled her eyes. "You don't know anything."

He was staring at her again; she could feel it. But she didn't know if he was angry or not because she flipped her notebook to a blank page – anything to not look at him. Edward didn't speak, he just watched her. Bella didn't have it in her to tell him to look the hell away.

"Isabella, I – "

"Save it, Edward," Bella interrupted. "I don't want to hear what you have to say."

"Then you don't have to listen. But I'm going to say it because it needs to be said out loud," He ran a hand through his hair, clearly distressed. "You're right, I don't know you. But I know you enough to realize that I was wrong to say those things to you throughout all of these years. I'm sorry that I made fun of you. I'm sorry that the whole school turned on you because of me. And I'm sorry for what you're going through right now. I've only gotten to really _meet _you in a short period of time, but what I've learned is that you're a good person. You didn't deserve how I treated you. Isabella, will you please, _please, _forgive me?"

An apology? Edward Cullen, Douche Master, was asking for her forgiveness? It must have been opposite day. He must be playing some joke. She must be dreaming. Never in a million years would she have ever thought the boy who made her life hell would ever apologize. If she saw pigs fly, Bella _still _wouldn't have believed it. And yet, he had actually said sorry … and he meant it. Bella was stunned. She didn't know what to say.

"Isabella Swan?" Ms. Cope stood at the door, a piece of paper in her hand.

"Um, yeah?" Bella replied.

A sweet smile appeared on her face. "Oh, Ms. Swan. If you could please come to the office with me."

Bella nodded. "Sure." Just as she stood, she caught a glimpse of Edward. His eyes bored into hers, and suddenly she was glad that Ms. Cope came in when she did. Bella wasn't ready to give Edward an answer yet. So she looked down quickly and pushed her chair in, walking out with the woman in yellow heels and brown pants.

"Am I in some kind of trouble, Ms. Cope?"

She chuckled. "Of course not, dear! Your parents are here and they just came to pick you up …"

Bella stopped, numb. "I-I'm sorry. Who is here?"

"Your parents," She said. "Sweetie, are you okay? You look rather pale."

Bella needed to get out of there. She walked back to the classroom, started running. But before she could even pass the water fountain, a strong grip wrapped around her arm. She didn't need to look back to see who it was, she just closed her eyes and prayed to be in a better place.

"Bella," Phil said, his voice sweet but thick with malice. "It's time to come home."

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**Heeeeeeeeey my lovely readers! I'm really happy that this didn't take me a month to update, so hopefully you are too :) School ended on Friday and dance on Saturday so guess what ... SUMMER 2011 GET AT ME! Well, I actually have to write my English exam on the 16th and my Bio Diploma on the 22nd, but I'm pretty much free. I'll be writing a whole a bunch and I'm super excited to get going with this story.**

**Okay, I know this is a cliffhanger, but please don't hurt/kill/abuse me. Would it better if I told you that the next chapter is in Edward's POV?**

**Don't forget to let me know your thoughts by REVIEWING!**

**I love you all and please stay safe,**

**Karina.**

**P.S.: PLEASE PRAY THAT I PASS MY BIO DIPLOMA. As I mentioned earlier, it's on June 22nd, and I really need a good grade. I'm freaking and stressing out. Your prayers would mean so much.**


	11. Chapter Eleven: Missing

_Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a nasty bruise on my knee. Yeah. Not awesome._

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Chapter Eleven - Missing

_**Bella**_

Bella tried not to stare at the blood trickling down her arm. It was thick and the smell made her nauseous. It was mocking her, laughing at her. She didn't cry … she _couldn't _cry. Bella should have known that he would have found her. She didn't know why she had kept up the wishful thinking. Phil was a monster, but he wasn't an idiot.

_I'm the one who's the idiot, _Bella thought, _I'm a fucking fool._

She was unconscious the minute Phil and Renee had taken Bella out of class. He hit her, not surprisingly, and Bella didn't know what happened after that. Her head hurt so much that she wasn't even sure that she dreamed of anything. Bella didn't know if anyone saw Phil hit her. Maybe he drugged her, maybe he didn't. She could have fucking fainted! Different scenarios rushed to Bella's thoughts, and the wonder of what _could_ _have_ happened truly frightened her. The only thing she was sure of was that she had woken up on the cold tile floor of her house – the home she had run away from weeks ago.

Hushed voices distracted Bella from the pain.

"… Phil, honey, please don't hurt her. I can only imagine what she has been going through these past couple of weeks," Renee whispered, though it sounded like she was pleading with him.

"She shouldn't have looked through your mail in the first place. She only made it worse by running away. Bella needs to learn discipline."

"Phil, please! You're hurting her _and me. _Just let us leave, and I won't tell the cops. We've been doing this for way too long – "

A thud cut her off. Bella's eyes weren't open – She didn't know what happened but she had an inkling. And if her instinct was right, Bella kept her eyes shut.

"You know you can't leave, Renee," Phil spat. "This conversation is over."

Bella heard his footsteps walk farther and farther away. With her eyes still shut, and her mind in full wonder, the only sound in the house was her mother's weeping.

**x x x x x x**

How long had she been lying there? It seemed like days, but Bella knew that it must have been at least an hour. She wondered what would happen if she pretended to wake up. She thought about it, but knew that it would not be a good idea. If she needed to be awake Phil would have let her known. And even though lying on the ground motionless was as exciting as watching a tree grow, Bella was smart enough to know it was safer than letting him know that she was awake and well aware of what was going to happen. He was going to hurt her, and if he was still angry about her running away, he might even kill her. Bella knew he was capable of doing such horrid things. She lived through it.

School must have been over already, and Bella could only imagine Alice waiting for her at her locker. She must have been calling her or texting her like mad, wondering where Bella was. But Bella didn't have her cell phone. She must have lost it, and that made Bella want to do a face palm. If she had any chance of escaping or getting help, it was gone the minute her cell phone left her pocket. No one would know that Bella was taken out of class or that she was fighting for her life. No one knew because no one cared about her. She wasn't known as Isabella Swan, she was known as the Duck, the Freak, that walked the halls like she actually hoped she would gain something in life. The thought of it made Bella want to burst into tears. None of her classmates gave her the chance to show that she was a good person. She did nothing wrong, it was all Edward Cullen's fault.

His name … it made her want to cry harder.

He was a dick, an asshole of sorts. He single handedly brought her from being a content, quiet girl with some acquaintances to someone who was socially alienated all in the span of freshman year. His best friend Rosalie supported him, and Angela was just a wannabe that would do anything for Edward. He called her names that everyone else eventually sneered at her. He humiliated her more times than anyone could ever imagine. And even though he did all of those things, Edward _helped _her when she needed it the most. Him and his family sheltered her and fed her. He tried to be nice to her and they were actually getting along, until he fucked it up. But maybe it was because he really _did _care about her. Maybe Edward _was _sorry for ruining a bit of her life. It was because of that she had to fight the tears. She had been ungrateful to him, and now she would never be able to tell him how sorry she was, and hoe grateful she was for his hospitality.

And then there was Alice, the idea of her prevented Bella from committing suicide. Alice was her first friend in a long time. If Phil killed Bella, she wondered how Alice would handle it. It seemed that she cared for Bella. Would she cry? Bella didn't know, but she was overly grateful for the small girl who seemed to never run out of energy. Bella only wished that she could _at least _give Alice her thanks for being a good friend, even if their friendship didn't last as long as she had hoped.

_Open your eyes, Bella. Face your fears headfirst. _

And with that, Bella blinked, the warm light from the chandeliers so bright that she had to squint. Bella didn't move. She only kept her eyes aware as she prepared her mind for her unfair demise.

_**Edward**_

"I'm thinking that we rent a scary ass movie and bury our faces in junk food like good ol' times."

"Uh-huh," Edward replied, not really listening.

"Maybe we could order a pizza or something. We could do it at my house. My mom misses you …" He kept nodding his head, hoping Rosalie would shut the fuck up so he could think for just a minute.

"Edward? Hey, Asshole, are you even listening to me?"

Shit, she figured out his plan. "Yeah, I fucking hear you, Rose. Scary movie, junk food, pizza. Sounds good."

"God, it's like I'm talking to a wall sometimes, Edward. What's up with you lately?" She asked clearly irritated that he wasn't giving her his full attention.

"Nothing is up," He said, though it was completely false. Isabella had left Creative Writing class and never came back. He'd like to say he was pissed because he had to work on the project by himself for the rest of class, but that also would have been a lie. The truth was that he was anxious. He had apologized to her with all of his heart, and then she was excused from class. She left so abruptly, and then she just disappeared. Edward didn't know what her reply to his apology was. He wouldn't have been too worried about Isabella's absence if she hadn't left her notebook in class. If she left it there that meant that she was going to come back. But she didn't, and that was why Edward was so mentally fucked.

Was she sick? Did his presence make her want to leave? Edward had felt bad about how things had went down that night at the diner. He didn't know why he acted that way, but it sure fucked things up.

"Actually, Rose,' Edward said as closed his locker door. "I don't think I can do tonight. Something's come up."

"Are you fucking with me right now? C'mon, E. How long has it been since you and I just hung out?"

"Look, I would love watch scary movies and pizza 'till I get sick, but I really can't. Why don't you ask Emmett? I'm sure he would love to do that with you."

Rosalie clicked her tongue, which meant she was pissed. "Yeah, I guess."

In an effort to cheer her up, Edward touched her shoulder. "Emmett's a good guy, Rose. He really likes you. You did well with this one, I'm happy for you. Really, I am."

"Thanks," She muttered, not looking at his eyes.

"I'll make it up to you, I promise. What are best friends for, right?"

"Yeah," Rose smiled, but it was false. Edward knew her well enough to know when she was hiding something. But he figured that she was just upset about him bailing. "I'll see you around, right?"

"Of course you will."

Edward left with that. He probably should have said that they should do something over the weekend, but his mind was elsewhere. He kept thinking about Isabella's notebook. It rested in his backpack and it would stay there until he got home. He would give it to her then, and ask where the hell she went. It didn't matter if she was still pissed. He _needed _to know. But he didn't know why he felt so worried, so anxious. It was so overly strange.

He couldn't explain how he felt in the days that Isabella ignored him. At first, Edward felt like telling the girl off. He was merely looking out for her. But as he analyzed the night at the diner, he knew that what he had done was not right. He didn't know Brant, didn't know if he would hurt Isabella. Edward overreacted and it was clear as day. But he didn't want to apologize. She had overreacted as well, and was a bitch about it. It was probably a good thing that they quit their truce – it wouldn't have worked out even if they tried with all their might. Edward had been telling himself that for the days Isabella stopped acknowledging him. And yet, hearing himself say that the two of them maintaining peace was an outstretched dream sounded … _wrong. _It sounded like he was trying to convince himself of the statement because he didn't believe it.

But Isabella hurt Rosalie, and she was bitch. He despised the girl … right?

Wrong. He didn't hate her. He didn't particularly like her … maybe he did. Fuck, Edward's mind was going in so many different directions that he didn't know where to look, didn't know which path to follow.

A squeal of a voice interrupted Edward's outrageous thoughts, and he was secretly thankful.

"Hey, Dickhead!" Alice yelled from the other side of the parking lot. Edward looked around, seeing if she was talking to someone else. When Edward saw that there was only Mrs. McGrath and him in the lot, he figured it was him that she was hollering at. Unless Alice had a problem with the drama teacher, then he was in an awkward situation. "Yeah, I'm talking to you, Asshole!" She was walking towards him with her eyes narrowed and her finger pointing at him. He wasn't going to say it out loud, but she was fucking scary as hell.

"Um, can I help you?" Edward asked sheepishly when she was standing right before him.

"Don't be fucking with me, Cullen. Have you seen Bella anywhere?"

Edward scratched his head. "No, I haven't. Why do you always come to me when you can't find her?"

"Because you're a shit and have been rude to her for most of her high school career. So excuse me if my first guess to why she suddenly left is because of something _you _did."

Edward rolled his eyes, but really he knew that Alice had a point. He had a feeling something else happened though, and he couldn't shake the feeling he had in his gut that something was seriously wrong.

"Look, I know I haven't been the nicest person to Isabella in the past, but I did apologize to her recently," Edward explained, though he didn't know why he was telling this to Alice. He didn't know why he was telling anyone this at all. "But if you happen to see Isabella, could you tell her to call me? I need to find her."

It wasn't until the words left his mouth did Edward realize what he said. Alice cocked her head to the side slightly, and he quickly recovered when he said, "Because … because we need to work on our creative writing project. She left in the middle of class and now we're seriously behind."

Alice had this glint in her eye, it was unrecognizable and Edward wanted to know what she was thinking. But she concealed her expression and nodded her head. "If I find _Isabella_ I'll let her know. And if you find her, tell _her _to call _me._ I have to talk to her about something."

"I will," Edward promised.

As Alice walked away, Edward couldn't help but wonder why she said Isabella's name like that. But he couldn't dwell on it for too long, because he needed to find her. The seriousness of her disappearance deepened when he realized that not even Alice knew where she went. He called Esme, asked if Isabella had gone home. But Esme said that she was home alone and that Isabella never stepped through the door. He hung up with furrowed brows. Where did she go? Was she in some sort of trouble? Edward knew that taking Isabella in meant that he had to make sure that she was safe. She was always scared, even though she tried to hide it through her bitchy remarks and sarcasm. The truth was that she was worried about something, always on edge. Edward knew this because he kept secrets, too.

The rain started to fall. Edward ran to his car before he got drenched. His hands were trembling and his heartbeat was quickening. Edward forgot that he hadn't eaten lunch, which meant he took too much. Fucking shit, he took too much. His shaking hands searched for the sandwich that he didn't eat earlier. When he had it in his hands, he took a big bite. As Edward chewed, he wanted to slap himself in the face. Carlisle would have a fit if he heard that Edward was stupid enough to not have lunch and on top of that, over exercise in gym class. Slowly, his heart slowed and his hands calmed. Edward took a deep breath and let himself relish in the feel of balance. His secrets, worries, and desires were all in equilibrium once again.

Edward hated feeling so vulnerable. He despised knowing that the smallest thing could hurt him, and that he couldn't be reckless like every other teenager. He had to keep reminding himself that he had to take care of himself for the sake of his family. What would Esme say if he told her what had happened? What would _Edward _say when Esme began to cry her eyes out, again? She had already gone through so much and Edward had to protect her from it. Which meant he had to protect himself as well.

However, he couldn't think about himself for too long. He had to find Isabella. Edward had been patient with her, let her keep her secrets and live a life under his roof. But he had a feeling that Isabella was in deep shit and that she couldn't go through it, whatever the hell _it_ was, alone. Once he found Isabella he would ask for answers, he wouldn't be cruel with her. Edward had learned that she was a stubborn little bitch. And be that as it may, he saw that underneath her tough exterior, she was broken. Edward couldn't help but feel guilty about it because he knew that he was part of the reason why she was the way she was. But there was something bigger than his actions that had Isabella frightened, and _that _was what Edward needed to find out.

He needed to find out how he could help.

And he needed to know why in the fucking hell he _wanted _to help.

_Knock. Knock._

Mrs. McGrath was waving at Edward as he lowered his window. "Edward! I'm so glad I caught you before the weekend started."

Edward nodded his head, smiling slightly so he wouldn't come off as rude. "What can I help you with, Mrs. McGrath?" God, it was like no one wanted him to leave campus.

"We're going to start casting for the first play of this school year," She gushed, handing him the script. The title, _'What Happened to Forever,' _typed in black ink stared back Edward. "It was written by a student, and I think you would do great in this play."

This happened every single time a new production was about to begin. Mrs. McGrath always asked Edward to do the school plays ever since he stepped in for Mike Newton in the school's adaptation of _'Les Miserables,' _in the ninth grade. He told Isabella he was a good actor because it was true, but he just wished that Mrs. McGrath would stop asking him. He felt bad telling her that he was always caught up in school and sports, just because he didn't want to.

"Thanks, Mrs. McGrath. I'll …" He was going to tell her his usually lie, but Edward sighed. "I'll look over it and see how I feel about it."

She clapped her hands. "That's all I ask. Now if you do decide to audition, remember that we'll be holding auditions in the auditorium after school, on Wednesday." Edward nodded, hoping the conversation would end soon. "Have a good weekend, Edward."

"Um, you too," he replied.

Once Mrs. McGrath turned around and walked back to her own car, Edward revved the engine and drove out of the parking lot. So much shit was going on, and now he had to read a damn play? What in the hell did he get himself into? Why did Edward _allow _it to occur? Edward had to find Isabella now, before anything else happened.

His first stop was at the diner. Jack was surprised to see him, even told him that his shift was on Sunday, not today. Edward almost laughed – like he would _forget _his day off – but told Jack that he was looking for someone. He left the kitchen where Jack was cooking burgers, and skimmed the sections of tables. Isabella was nowhere to be seen.

"Edward!" Tanya said just as he was looking through the last row. She came back from ushering customers to their table. Her blonde hair was tied into a high ponytail and she was wearing her square-framed glasses. Edward nodded towards them.

"Your mom forgot to order your contacts again?" He guessed.

She nodded and sighed. "Yup. But I can't really blame her because she's working three jobs right now."

Edward felt sympathy for Tanya. He grew up in an estate community while Tanya had been working since she was twelve. She was the most mature fourteen-year-old girl he had ever met, and he knew that it was because Tanya's mom raised her by herself and struggled supporting the two of them.

Edward pushed her glasses farther onto the bridge of her nose gently with his thumb. "You look good, T. You always do." She blushed a slight pink, and Edward knew that he cheered her up again. He then remembered why he was at the diner and asked, "Hey, T, did you see a girl with brown hair and eyes come in earlier?"

"Can you be a little more specific?"

Edward thought deeply, trying to touch base to the faintest memories of that day. "Her hair … her bangs were pulled to the side in a braid. And I think she was in a dark green shirt. It like, fell off her shoulder … oh fuck. Do you know what the hell I'm talking about? Because I don't."

"Do you mean an off-the-shoulder shirt?" Tanya asked.

Edward clapped his hands. "Yes! Holy fuck, did you see her?"

Tanya tapped the side of glasses before she shook her head. "No, I'm sorry. Why, is this girl in some sort of trouble?"

"Let's pray that she's not," Edward muttered. "I'll see you on Sunday, T."

"Um, okay. Bye, Edward!" Tanya waved, clearly confused at their conversation.

After the diner, Edward checked the clinic. He hoped that Monica saw her because of some sort of pain medications that Isabella took, but she wasn't seen. He left and began right where he started. Edward called Emmett since he didn't know Alice's number and asked her if Isabella had shown up. When she replied with a, _no I have no idea where she is, _Edward cursed. Alice was worried now, too. She probably went on her own search party, but Edward didn't have time to team up with her. It was like Isabella fell off the face of the Earth, and that sent chills up his spine.

He was driving towards his house, hoping that she would be there, and was coming up Rose's street when he saw Brant. Edward didn't want to talk to him by any means, but knew that Isabella and him had some sort of thing going on. Edward grumbled to himself as he slowed his car by Brant. The guy looked surprised when Edward rolled down his window.

"Hey, have you seen Isabella?" He asked.

"Who?" Brant responded.

_Was he fucking serious?_

Edward sighed. "The girl you were with a couple nights ago. Brown hair, pale skin …"

"Oh! You mean Bella?"

"Yes."

Brant then shook his head as he crossed his arms. "I haven't seen her since that night at the diner," Great, the guy was fucking useless! "Do I know you from somewhere?"

"I was the guy who waited your table that night. I'm Edward Cullen."

The mention of his name seemed to make Brant's eyes go wide, and then he started to chuckle. "So _you're_ Edward. I've heard a lot about you, man. But hey, if you see Bella, can you tell her to call me?"

"Sure, no problem," Edward said, even though he wasn't going to tell Isabella. He had to find her first, before he could not tell her about Brant.

Edward drove away, heading back to his house. He wondered how Brant knew about him, and why he said his name like that. Did Isabella say something about him? She probably did. Edward didn't know who else would know Brant, because he never saw him before until that night. And Edward knew everyone who lived in Forks. He would have to ask Isabella what she told Brant.

But he had to fucking find her. Where in the hell would that girl be?

What made matters worse was that when he got home, she wasn't there. The house was empty – Esme and Carlisle had gone to a charity event, and Isabella was God knows where. Edward felt like kicking down a door or breaking a vase. He didn't know where else to look, and he was getting worried. He was about to lose all hope, when he looked through the window.

_The woods._

Edward ran out the door and into the swarm of trees and rain. While he hoped Isabella was in there, he also wished she wasn't. For this was the place where he saw her taking the glass and puncture it with her skin. The place where he saw Isabella lost without hope or faith. Edward hoped she wasn't within these woods, because if she was, then she could have been doing something she hadn't finished those weeks prior. The thought of Isabella dead on the ground made Edward run faster. He couldn't imagine what would happen if she was dead. He would have to carry her empty body back to civilization, and Edward knew that he wouldn't be able to do it. He would stare at her, and wait until he was too weak to move. Her death was on his hands – he promised to keep her safe, even if she didn't know it.

"Isabella!" Edward yelled, calling for her in desperation. He was in the exact same spot where he had found her. The broken beer bottle was taunting him and he had to look away. He circled the area, searched behind trees and in between bushes. She wasn't anywhere. Edward punched a tree in frustration, and blood spilled from his knuckles. He ran both hands through his hair and groaned.

"Where could you be?" He whispered.

He walked back home, all the while trying to think of other places Isabella could be. At that point all Edward could pray for was that she wasn't dead. She was in trouble, but he prayed to God that she was still alive. She could have simply left to get something from the grocery store, but Edward knew that wasn't the case. From the minute he began stitching her arm up, Edward could tell that Isabella was far from normal, and she was in danger. God, where could she be? He felt the need to pray again as he got closer to his house, and when he rounded the corner, Edward's heart stopped.

Isabella was sitting on the porch, not even bothering to stay dry in the rain. He felt like jumping in the air in relief. But then he saw that the green shirt she was wearing was stained with blood on her side. The bandage that encased her stitches was gone, exposing the bruise that lay right beside the last stitch. Edward's stomach churned with the sight of Isabella. And when she saw him, their eyes locking, Edward felt his heart drop and his hands go numb. Those brown eyes of hers began to fill with tears and Edward ran to her.

"I'm sorry," Isabella cried. "I didn't know where else to go."

"Shhh," He soothed into her hair as she cried into his shoulder. "It's okay. I'm here."

Edward didn't know how long they sat in the rain, his arms wrapped around Isabella as she sobbed and clutched onto his shirt. He didn't mind that his skin was painted with her blood. It only made him hold onto her tighter. What he saw only confirmed that Isabella needed to be kept safe. Edward was willing to do the job - he didn't want to see her hurt and cry anymore.

* * *

**Twitter: kaarinaxo**

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**Who else noticed that this update is only a week after the last? I DID :) haha.**

**All my exams are done (and thank you to those who prayed for me to do well!), so that means summer has officially started! Well, for me at least. It's kind of weird knowing that I'm done grade 11 and will be in grade 12 this September. Surreal! Anyways, you can expect way more updates this summer because I really have nothing better to do! I'm so excited you guys. Writing for this story is one of my favorite things to do, and I'm constantly inspired for it. Your continuous support has also motivated me. Thank you - you are all beautiful, and I'm grateful to have you as readers.**

**Now, I'll be leaving for San Francisco tomorrow (or today? idk, it's 1 am here), and I come back on July 4th. I'm sorry there won't be an update next week, but I'm hoping to get one up when I get back. It's already written, it just needs A LOT of editing, because I'm OCD when it comes to my work and I don't want to present you guys with nothing but my best. So yeah, when I get back there'll be an update for sure!**

**Alright you guys, I better go sleep. I gotta be at the airport by 9:30 A-fucking-M, and I take like five years to get ready. Okay. Not really. But I do take a long time to get ready in the morning. I'll be reading the last book in "The Immortals" series, "Everlasting", by Alyson Noel. I'm so excited to get started! If you haven't read the series yet, you should. I'm also taking "Passion," by Lauren Kate with me. You should that series, too :)**

**Okay, okay, okay. Now I'm actually leaving. I love you all and I hope you have a safe summer full of fun memories!**

**Don't forget to REVIEW!**

**Much Love,**

**Karina. **


	12. Chapter Twelve: Reprieve

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. I do own a copy of Colbie Caillat's new album "All of You", though. It is seriously the sweetest album ever. The perfect playlist for summer :)

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Chapter Twelve: Reprieve

_**Bella**_

A minute must have gone by until Phil took notice of Bella. She was at eye level with his feet, and Bella tried to focus on the leather dress shoes he wore to work. He was waiting for her to acknowledge him. Bella could feel his stare sink into her skin as she blinked at his shoes – she wasn't ready to face him yet. If he could give her only a second more to let her live. She was so scared, but she knew she had to be brave. There was no way anyone could prepare for death. Bella was seventeen and had experienced little in her life. She would never get to visit Europe or lay on a beach. She would never get to go to prom or get the chance to graduate. Bella would never have her first kiss … she would die a virgin.

She fought the tears and screamed when Phil pulled her by her hair. It was beginning. There was no way out now, and Bella knew that. She only hoped that her death would be quick. She closed her eyes as he threw her against the wall. Clenching her jaw as Phil ripped the bandage off her arm with so much force that she knew her stitches were also split. She could feel her limbs begin to loose strength, could feel her breath become shallow. Every nerve in her body was standing on end, yelling at her to make it stop. She couldn't – he was too strong.

"This is for looking through business that isn't yours," Phil yelled, throwing a wine glass at her side, the shards digging into her skin.

Bella cried out.

"This is for being a brat and little bitch," He threw another glass. Bella was sure her side sparkled in the light with all of the glass etched into her flesh.

"And this," Phil paused. He then laughed with such malice that Bella knew that she was near the end. She then let the tears fall. "This is for running away and making me look like a bad father."

She felt the pain before she felt him kick, digging the bits of glass deeper into her side. His leather shoes were so deceiving. Once a pair of shoes that showcased wealth, was now a weapon. Like Phil, it was misleading. One glance beneath the stitching and through the laces, revealed a monster. Bella couldn't believe that she thought Phil was her father, and wondered what it would be like if she had known Charles Garland had existed earlier.

It was in that moment that Bella rose on her elbows, glaring right at Phil. She didn't know what was controlling her, but whatever it was, it grew inside of her. He was pacing the room with a glass of whiskey in his hand. "You're a _fool,_" Bella spat. Her voice was hoarse and thick with the pain shooting from her side. "You're pathetic."

Phil slammed his glass on the counter. "What did you just say?"

"You're a pathetic fool," Bella said louder. "And you can't hurt me anymore."

"Like hell I can't! I'm your father, I can do whatever the fuck I want with you." Just to prove that he could, Phil threw the empty whiskey bottle against her side. She gritted her teeth in agony.

"You're not my dad!" Bella screamed, slamming her fist into the ground.

She saw his eyes burn with anger and his nostrils flare. His fists were clenched. Phil walked slowly towards her, but just as he was about to strike her Bella whispered, "They know."

That was all it took for Phil to stop mid-air.

"The Cullen's … they know what you've been doing to me. If you touch me once more they'll call the police. And this time I won't hesitate – I'll let them talk to the authorities."

"So you've been next door this whole time," Phil huffed at this. "How much do they know?"

"Every. Damn. Thing," Bella said. "So please, leave me alone."

She waited for him to reply, but Phil simply took his whiskey and had a sip. He kicked the wall and rubbed his jaw. Bella took that as her chance to escape. She got up on shaky legs and headed for the door. She didn't look back at Phil. Her hand clutched onto her burning side, the sensation too much to withstand. Bella's hand touched the doorknob when she heard someone gasp. She didn't have to look back to know who it was. Bella closed her eyes in frustration and took a deep breath before glancing behind her.

"Bella," Renee cried, covering her mouth. Bella watched as her mother's eyes wandered her side, how the blood was pooling over her hand as she tried to take a handle of the pain. "Oh, my baby girl."

Renee reached for her, but Bella took a step back. All she could look at was the bruise settled on her mother's left cheek. As much as Bella wanted to hug her and tell her that it would be okay, Bella couldn't. That bruise was the miniature version of what Bella had gone through for years. And again, Renee didn't even come to Bella's rescue when she was about to die not too long ago. So even though the remorse in her mother's eyes was begging for Bella, she couldn't stand to look at her mom any longer.

Bella shook her head and slipped out the door. It didn't matter how sorry Renee was now. It didn't matter if she _understood_ what Bella had gone through. The truth of the matter was that even though people said to trust their parents, Bella felt farther away from hers than she ever had before. And as she crossed the yard to the Cullen's house, Bella could feel the pull between her and her mother stretch until whatever relationship they had snapped in two. The only parent she knew was the one she wished she could forget.

Bella sat on the steps of the Cullen's porch. She held onto her side as tightly as she could, almost like she was trying to squeeze out the pain. She didn't use the key under the flowerpot to go inside, she just sat. Bella didn't know what she was waiting for, but she didn't mind sitting in the rain. It washed away the blood from her fingers. Bella watched as it swam from her skin, and it was then that Bella began to laugh. Not hysterically, but out of disbelief. She had fled the madness. She was hurt in the process, but she was able to run away from it all. Her worst nightmare might have been a few feet away, but where she sat … it was like she was sitting on gold.

She took a look at her waist, and Bella felt her eyes begin to tear up again. She blinked them away, but Bella couldn't help but bite her lip as she looked at how the pieces of glass seemed to blend into her skin. How her blood made them shine like rubies. Dangerous, foul rubies. Bella couldn't look at it anymore, she sighed and rolled her shirt back down. For a while, she just stared at the her hands. Her injuries weren't what they used to be. They used to be the result of her weakness. But now she saw them differently, and she couldn't identify why.

Bella felt someone in her presence. And as she lifted her eyes, she couldn't believe how happy she was. Never before would she have imagined how relieved she was to see Edward Cullen. He was panting, his bronze hair a deep brown because of the rain and his cheeks painted rose. In the rain Bella couldn't help but notice how his eyes sparkled. They were a true, deep green and Bella thought that she had never seen anything so pretty.

She saw those eyes trail to her shirt, her bloodstained shirt. She knew that she couldn't hide her secret anymore. The thought made Bella cry, and it felt like a relief. Suddenly, he was by her side and she was crying into his shoulder. She was holding onto his shirt like her life depended on it, but the truth was that she wanted to make sure he wouldn't leave. The whole scene was crazy – no one would ever believe that Bella and Edward were in each other's arms. The Duck and Douche Master … together on the porch steps. They were supposed to hate each other. But at that moment, Bella didn't hate Edward. She felt like she needed him.

Bella found herself apologizing to him. She didn't specify what she was sorry for because she had so many things she felt responsible of. She was sorry that she treated Edward like dirt after the whole scene about Brant. Regretted being so cold to him after he had showed many times that he was trying to help. Bella didn't see it before because she thought Edward helped her through pity, but he really did _care _for her. The proof was in the moment she was currently in, and she couldn't believe it. Why did he care for her, after he openly despised her for years? And why did she allow him to feel that way?

"Let's go inside," Edward whispered. "You need to get cleaned up."

Bella nodded, wiping her face of any tears that strayed from her eyes. Sitting up from the steps was harder than Bella thought it would be. The pain on her side was almost unbearable now to the point that she was getting numb. Her one hand clutched onto it to try and stop the throbbing while the other tried to help herself up. Edward must have noticed her struggle because she felt him wrap his arm around her waist, the uninjured side, and pull her arm around his shoulders. He easily lifted her up, assisting her inside the house. Bella noticed how gentle he was with her, how his eyes would constantly check on her to make sure she was okay and that their moving around wasn't too painful or uncomfortable.

"Here you go," Edward said, sitting Bella down on the leather couch. "Can I take a look?" He nodded towards her wound. Bella hesitated, but allowed him to. He rolled up her shirt and she heard him gasp.

She closed her eyes, ashamed of what she had allowed to happen to her. "I know, I know. It's horrible, isn't it?"

Edward cleared his throat. "I … I'll be right back."

When he left, Bella understood his reaction. A boy who had lived in such a well-rounded family and was always sure his parents loved him couldn't possibly imagine how she had gotten glass embedded in her skin. She scared him off – it was okay. She was used to doing that. Edward then came back with a first aid kit in one hand and a glass of milk in the other. He handed her the milk before setting the first aid kit on the table.

"Milk?" She looked at it questioningly.

"I thought you might be thirsty, and it can help distract you while I take out the pieces of glass from your skin," Edward said. "Shit, I forgot something. Just stay here."

"I wasn't planning on moving."

Edward grimaced before rubbing his jaw. "Oh, right. Then just drink your milk while I go grab something, okay?"

Bella nodded, but she would be lying if she told herself that it didn't feel good to make Edward feel awkward. For as long as she had known him, he always seemed so confident and sure of himself. He was a social butterfly. Bella felt satisfied that she had brought out the discomfited side of Edward. Then she remembered that Edward had secrets too, and that there was more than meets the eye with him. Bella turned from pleased to guilty.

He came back with the garbage bin and a pair of tweezers. Bella took a sip of her milk to make it seem like she wasn't nervous, even though she obviously was.

"This is going to hurt a little," Edward muttered as he rolled her shirt higher.

"A little?" Bella asked, not really believing him.

Edward ran a hand through his hair. "Okay, it's going to hurt a lot. Try to think of something else while I take these out."

"What the hell do I think about?"

"I don't know. It's up to you."

Bella was about to retort when she caught his stare. For a while, they were just watching each other. It was almost like they were making sure neither of them would leave. Before she knew what she was doing, Bella touched Edward's arm. Still looking at each other, Bella said, "Talk to me." Realizing how ridiculous that was, she pulled her hand away and cleared her throat, suddenly uncomfortable. Breaking the eye contact, she glanced at her hands. "Distract me with conversation."

"O-okay," he stuttered.

Edward sat on the couch beside Bella and began to pick out the pieces of glass. It stung, _badly. _It felt like the glass was cutting her again as the tweezers pulled them out. Like they wanted to remind Bella that she was fragile and could easily be broken. However, as Edward continued working on her she began to calm down. His hands, cold as winter, seemed to numb the pain, making it more bearable every time his skin touched hers. Bella didn't understand this calming feeling that was coursing between them. It was strange. Did Edward feel the same way? Or was she just exhausted from the day she had?

_Fucking talk to me already, Ass, _she thought, _I can't think about this shit right now._

"When you left, I had to work on the project alone. So … I guess we're even now," Edward said.

Bella laughed bitterly. "Did you actually work on it, or did you do something else?"

"I worked on it," He scoffed. "You know, after I studied for my math exam."

"Maybe you should have done your math homework last night."

"It was either studying trigonometry or going on Skype. I obviously chose Skype."

"But just think. If you didn't go on Skype last night and studied for your exam instead, you could have worked on our project the whole time."

"If you didn't leave, you could have gotten a head start and therefore, we would have had a sufficient amount of work done," Edward replied, before his eyes went from playful to sympathetic. Bella hadn't even processed what he had said until he dropped his hand from her flesh. His words sinking into her skin as the pain returned.

Bella hung her head. "I'm sorry."

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said …" Edward started.

But she didn't let him continue. "I didn't know they would try and find me." She waited for him to reply, but he said nothing. "How could I? I mean, they've never really showed they cared for me before. It didn't even occur to me that after a few weeks they would check the school."

"Who are you talking about?" Edward asked.

"My mom and … and Phil."

Edward picked out another piece of glass, letting it fall into the garbage bin as he moved to remove another one. His brows knit together as he continued take out bits of glass. Like he was concentrating on not hurting her. Bella wanted to laugh at the thought, but didn't when he asked, "Did they do this to you?"

"Mom didn't do this, but Phil did," Bella confirmed. "It's okay. He's done worse."

"Is that why you ran away from home? Why you almost …"

Bella gulped. "Partially."

"What do you mean?"

"Why do you hate me?" Bella asked, completely changing the subject. She wasn't ready to tell Edward about discovering that a man she didn't even know was her biological father. So much was revealed already, and Bella didn't even know why she allowed herself to expose so much. It was like she had no control over what she said. But now she did and she wanted to keep that piece of information to herself for a while.

Edward's hand paused on her skin. "I don't."

"That's hard to believe," Bella said.

"But it's true," Edward said. "I mean, at times I didn't particularly like you, but I never _hated _you."

"But why? I never did anything to you."

Edward shrugged. "You hurt Rose."

Bella was beyond confused. "How?"

"She told me that you made a move on Tyler Crowley."

"The weird guy that wouldn't stop staring at me?" Edward hesitated before nodding. "Ew, no! That's ridiculous. That guy freaked me the fuck out."

"Oh," was all he said. "Oh, _God. _I'm so sorry, Isabella."

Bella should have been pissed, she should have wanted to rip him a new one for being such a gullible fool. The idea that Bella would make a move on Tyler Crowley was ludicrous. She hardly had any idea of how to act around guys. She didn't know why Rosalie would lie about such a thing, and why Edward would believe her. It was because of that bitch's lie that Edward had treated Bella so coldly, and why the rest of the school followed his footsteps.

However, she didn't feel that way. Bella felt sorry for both herself and Edward. Both of them were victims of a lie. Both acted foolishly and irrationally towards each other. And for what? Bella pitied herself for reacting to the way Edward had treated her. He was only acting out because he cared so passionately for the people close to him. She remembered Esme telling her this earlier that day. Even though she wanted to hate him, Bella couldn't be mad at someone with such a quality.

And that's when she realized that she didn't hate Edward either.

"I forgive you," She heard herself whisper.

Her gaze focused on Edward's, whose expression was shocked. "For what?"

"For … everything," Bella said, shrugging. "I don't want you to beat yourself up for it, so I forgive you."

"You shouldn't," Edward mumbled. "I'm an asshole for believing such a lie. When Rosalie first told me, years ago, I thought it was ridiculous. I should have followed what I believed in, instead of letting my temper get the best of me."

Bella blinked. "Believe what you want, but I still forgive you. I was at fault as well."

Edward glanced at her, his mouth curving into a slight grin. "That's nice of you to say, thank you. But we both know the truth."

It was in that moment that Bella saw Edward in a whole new perspective. No longer did his eyes glow or his hair come to life. That imperfect smile of his didn't seem so silly. Instead, Bella could see the flecks of gold in those deep green eyes, the way they seemed to sparkle when she told him that she held no grudge for him. He didn't look like a monster. Bella could see a real person when she looked at Edward now. It was bizarre since she had only seen him in hate for so long, but now she could see that he had real feelings and good intentions. Despite past actions Bella, along the way, had grown to unravel the very core of Douche Master until all she saw was the person crying to come out. And now that she was able to see this, Bella felt something stir inside her. It tingled in her chest, spreading through her arms and legs until her whole being was within the sensation. It was a weird feeling. Bella didn't know what to make of it.

**x x x x x x**

Within the next two hours, Bella had taken a shower, and had changed into new clothes. After ridding the shirt that was stained with her blood and tears, Edward had gotten her bandaged up and cooked both of them dinner. Apparently Esme and Carlisle had driven to Port Angeles for some charity event. Black and White Tie and all that jazz. As they worked on their separate homework, Edward had pieced together a few things in her life. The first one he was able to come up with was the subject regarding her pain medications.

"The pain meds were for all the times your dad …"

"Phil," Bella corrected.

"… Right. _Phil _had hurt you. Is that correct?"

"Yes."

"And why did you forge your mother's signature to obtain them?" He asked.

Bella sighed, scratching her head. There was really no use in trying to keep things to herself with this guy. "She never helped me. Whenever Phil would slam my head against the wall or kick me," Edward flinched. "She would just stand there. And if she wasn't in the room, then she would pretend that she wouldn't hear. But I knew she could hear me crying, she just didn't give a shit to do anything. So I guessed that she wouldn't give two fucks over medication to subside the pain her husband had caused."

"I'm sorry," Edward sympathized.

"Don't worry about it, I'm alive. That's all that matters, right?"

Edward nodded before returning to his Spanish homework. And as they continued to work, the more he epiphanies he had. Why she was scared that night when he climbed into her room to retrieve some clothes and toiletries. The reason she felt so obligated to do things around the house. It seemed to all come together in his mind in a way that never occurred to Bella. She hadn't realized that the way she reacted was because of her fears.

"I made you cry," Edward stated. Bella touched her cheeks, pulling her hand back to see that her fingertips were wet. Bella let out a small laugh – she hadn't even realized she was crying. "Please stop crying, Isabella. I'll stop."

"Edward, I'm not crying because of you. I've just ... I've been through a lot," Bella explained. The expression he held was full of guilt, which reflected off Bella. She felt bad that her tears made him feel that way. When her words didn't sympathize him, Bella closed her books and pushed them away. "I'm done with homework," She said, trying to change the subject. "How about a movie?"

"O-oh, okay," Edward stuttered, closing his books as well. "What do you want to watch?"

"Well, what do you have?"

Edward stood and tilted his head towards the basement. "Let's take a look."

Bella was incredulous at first, but once she saw that Edward was serious, she followed him to the basement. At her home, the basement was cold and dark. Storage for shit that had no other place but to be below everything else. However, as they bounded the steps, Bella realized that the Cullen's place was the complete opposite. She had never been in their basement before, and she wondered why.

The place was spacious; the floors were carpeted in a light beige. There was a pool table and a bar, along with a dartboard and a sound system. The furniture, like the rest of the pieces, floors above, was a deep mahogany. Along the far wall was a flat screen television hanging from the wall, a black leather couch opposite. Against the wall beside the television was a matching couch, which faced the wall with the widest collection of movies Bella had ever seen.

_Holy son of a fuck._

She ran her fingers along the spines of the movie cases. There were so many, all different genres. Action. Comedy. Romance. Suspense. Horror. Classic. Bella couldn't decide what she wanted to see, so she let Edward decide. She watched as his eyes skimmed the racks of films, his fingers cupping his chin. Finally, he pulled out a movie. Bella was surprised that he picked _The Ring. _But shrugged and sat on the couch as Edward set the DVD up. He turned off the lights when the movie started and gave her a blanket since it was cold.

"Do you mind if we share the blanket?" Edward questioned. "I think the other one is in the wash, and I don't want to have to go all the way upstairs to get another one."

Bella glanced at the blanket. "Sure."

Even though they were under the same blanket, Bella made sure that they kept their distance. She could tell that Edward was doing the same. Esme and Carlisle eventually came back, their footsteps confirming their arrival. Edward yelled that they were downstairs, and Bella was pretty sure she heard Esme say, "Okay, Honey."

She didn't like to admit it – but scary movies freaked her the fuck out. She didn't particularly enjoy them because of that very reason. Bella didn't enjoy things jumping out and horrific looking people killing others in horrific situations. So as _The Ring _prolonged, Bella felt like crawling up in a hole. She was holding onto the edge of the blanket for dear life, ready to cover her eyes when the time was necessary.

"You scared?" She heard Edward ask.

Bella shook her head and gulped. "No." Something popped up in the screen that made Bella scream and cover her eyes. She heard Edward chuckle. "Okay. Maybe a little."

The movie was ending when the scariest shit Bella had ever seen occurred. Bella hid under the blanket, only realizing that Edward had done the same. Once _The Ring _was over, Bella began to laugh. Edward was lost, having no idea why she thought the situation was so hilarious.

"Not so tough now, huh?" Bella mocked.

Edward shot up from under the blanket. "Shut up."

Bella took the blanket off her head and chuckled. "Admit it. You were scared."

"I only did that so you wouldn't feel like such a wimp."

Bella scoffed. "That is complete bullshit."

"Okay, maybe I got scared," Edward admitted. "But that movie was messed up!"

"At least I can admit that I was scared without giving some excuse."

Edward flipped her off.

Which caused Bella to lightly shove his chest.

And then they were so close to each other. Bella could feel his breath brush against her cheeks. Her heart was beating fast as Edward's eyes locked with hers. She wasn't aware of what happened until he began leaning in …

Then the doorbell rang. It broke whatever hypnotism had occurred between them, and Bella instantly pulled away. Edward cleared his throat and scratched his head. Bella crossed her arms over her chest. "We should see who that is," Edward suggested. She nodded in agreement, anything to get away from what just happened.

Nothing happened. They didn't kiss, but they almost did. Bella wondered how it had gotten to that situation. What lead the two of them to connecting in that way? Clearly, Edward didn't know either, because his eyebrows furrowed together in that way when he was trying to figure something out. Bella followed him up the stairs. She felt like she was leaving something behind the farther they got away from the basement. Like she was fleeing the sensation she had felt when Edward's nose brushed hers, their lips almost touching. Bella shouldn't have felt that way. She had so much other shit to figure out still, what went on between her and Edward could have been the creation of her stress and worries coming together.

At least, that's what she was telling herself.

As they rounded the corner towards the foyer, Bella could hear Esme and Carlisle's voices.

"How can we help you?" Carlisle asked, though he sounded strained.

It wasn't until Edward protectively put his arm around her waist, his hand placed over the wounds she had received earlier, did Bella realize why the Cullen's were suddenly panic-stricken with the person standing at the door.

She couldn't help but feel the same way.

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**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

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**So, lots of confessing in this chapter. Bella didn't confess to everything though. Wonder what will happen when she finally reveals it all. Hmmmm, i wonder what will happen when Edward tells his secrets. Who do you think was at the door? Hmmmmm ... all these questions just seem to pop out of nowhere as this story prolongs. Don't worry, eventually everything will be answered. Not all at the same time though. Ah, don't you just love mystery? I sure do! I'm evil like that.**

**_***THIS IS IMPORTANT!***_**

** Okay, not really. I'm just really indecisive. If you follow me on twitter you would know that I came across one of my old stories, Escape Meadow, while I was sifting through my documents. I have no idea why I deleted it off fanfiction. I have a feeling it's because I then posted it on Twilighted (which I don't go on anymore, for some reason). But then I didn't finish it, and I had so much planned for it. I think I didn't finish it because it was just exhausting having to go on here, post for Believe Me, then go on Twilighted and post for Escape Meadow. I obviously chose Believe Me. Anyways, my question is, would you guys like it if I continued it? I would be posting it on here, obviously. Here's the summary:**

_Between a father who neglects her, a mother who walked out of the family completely, and a goddess for a sister, Bella's life couldn't be any harder. Her parent's divorce is eating at her but she doesn't let anyone know it by hiding herself in textbooks. When the new kids show up, will this be Bella's summer to finally open up to others? Or will she just be a hermit like every summer and ignore the world around her?_ (this is a really, REALLY, old summary. If I continue this I plan on making a better summary that doesn't actually sound like shit).

**Obviously I'll be changing quite a bit, only because some of the conflicts in this story have already been used in my other stories. But it won't change too much. What do you think? I really want to write a summer fic, seeing since it's summer and all. I kind of also want to get out of the dramatic, angsty stuff and get into the fun, reckless shit. Sounds like fun, yes? Let me know!**

**Okay, this is a really fucking long ass Author's Note. But I had so much to say since I was gone for so long. Love you all, by the way. You are all so supportive and I don't think I can ever show you how grateful I really am to have you as readers. You make me smile, and my heart melt.**

**I'm going to try and update every week. Emphasis on _try_. I think I can do it, though. It's summer and times ceases to exist haha. I'm going to see if I can make it for a specific day, and I'll let you know. But yeah, I'm pretty sure I can update every week. How does that sound?**

**REVIEW PLEASE,**

**Karina :)**


	13. Chapter Thirteen: Embrace

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Twilight. However, I do own a new Michael Kors bag, to which I'm so in love with and treat it like it's my child. Haha.

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Chapter Thirteen: Embrace

_**Bella**_

Bella thought she had escaped. She believed that she was finally able to leave that part of her behind, but just like she had feared, she would never be left alone. They would always find her. They would always want more. She could feel her breaths become shallower as the seconds slipped away, the beads of sweat forming on her forehead. The sense of calm she had once been in was now washed away with the trembling that progressed from her hands and were now flowing to her knees. Edward's supportive arm around her was what was keeping her standing; otherwise she was sure she would have collapsed onto the ground.

Bella wanted to run, find a hiding spot she was sure no one would find her. But it was like her feet refused to move, like they had taken control of her. As much as she wanted to scream and cry, Bella put on a brave face. The Cullen's, the family that had shown nothing but support and care for her in the past couple of weeks, surrounded her. It made her feel safer as they all stared at the woman standing outside the door. It was four against one.

"Mom," Bella said, though it barely came out as a whisper. But even so, all set of eyes darted to her. Edward's grip seemed to tighten. "What are you doing here?"

"We're leaving," She said. "We're going to Canada."

Canada? Did they want to move to a new place because they didn't want anyone to know about Phil's home activities? The thought of moving to a new country just to start anew scared Bella, because she knew they wouldn't _really _be creating a fresh start. Home, wherever they planned on moving, would still be the same. Bella would still get hurt, no matter where they lived.

She shook her head violently. "I don't want to go to Canada." She turned to Edward gripping his shirt. "You can't let them take me away. You know what they'll do if we leave."

"Bella," Renee started.

"No!" She yelled, her voice frantic. "Please, don't let them take me."

"Isabella Swan," Renee said sternly, her voice full of authority. "Can you please calm down and let me continue?" Bella reluctantly let go of Edward's shirt, giving him an apologetic look before nodding her head at her mother. She had never heard Renee use such command in her voice before. It intimidated her. "We're going to Canada …"

Bella closed her eyes, trying not to cry at the feet of her fate.

"… But you won't be leaving with us."

"What?" Bella whispered, her eyes opening wide in shock. Why wouldn't they take her with them to Canada? Phil knew that Bella had told the Cullen's about his activities, shouldn't he want to keep her mouth shut?

Then it clicked. Since the Cullen's were fully aware, Phil viewed them as a threat. If he and Renee took Bella along with them to Canada, then Esme and Carlisle would for sure tell the authorities. It wouldn't take long before the police went down on his ass. And if they didn't find him, Bella could escape. She was smart and observant. Which meant that Bella, herself, was a threat. After all this time, while she cried in her sleep and took medication to ease the physical pain he had caused, she turned out to be the one who frightened Phil. The irony of it all was overwhelming.

"It's just you know," Renee said. "Phil got a job offer and it wouldn't be right to make you move when you're so settled in and will be graduating within the next two years. We'll be making visits constantly, so we're not completely abandoning you."

"So I'll just stay at home or …"

"Oh, God no! You just turned seventeen, Bella. I was actually wondering if maybe Mr. and Mrs. Cullen would be kind enough to take you in," Renee peered at them with hopeful eyes.

"That would be no problem," Carlisle said without hesitation. "What are neighbors for?"

Renee brought her hands to her chest. "That's wonderful!" She walked over to Bella, giving her a hug. Bella didn't embrace her mom, she stood as still as stone before Renee let go and held her at arm's length. She could see the bruise that she saw earlier rested on her cheek, but it was covered with makeup. Bella could recognize it because she had covered her injuries so many times – no matter how much foundation was used, the discoloration was always present. "Now, why don't you go back to the house and gather some things for your stay while I talk to the Cullen's."

"Um, I-I d-don't know if that's …"

"Your … _father_, left to go to the grocery store not too long ago. I left the door unlocked for you in case you didn't have your key."

Renee's words sunk in. She was trying to say that she was safe. Phil wasn't home, so Bella could freely gather her belongings without running into him and stirring another beating. Renee made sure that Phil was out of the house before she came here and sent Bella on her way. She was protecting her, and while Bella was flattered that she worried enough to do so, Bella wondered why she suddenly _cared. _Renee never made an effort to stop Phil before, and now she suddenly had Bella's back? What was she trying to do? Was this some sort of fucking game?

As Bella stared at her mother, she realized that there was no game. Renee was truly sincere in her new sense of motherly protectiveness. And before she knew what she was doing, Bella was nodding her head and loosening her mother's grip before making her way out the door.

"I'll go with you," Edward said. He had been quiet for most of the confrontation; Bella almost forgot he was there. "If you have a lot of stuff then you won't need to make too many trips."

"Oh, okay. Sure." Bella shifted onto her heels, she didn't really own much. It would only take one trip. But still, she didn't want to go alone.

Once Edward and Bella stepped through the door, she felt the cool crisp of the October night. The rain had subsided, becoming a light drizzle. They ran across the grass until they were under the shelter of her porch. She took one glance at her neighbor's house, squinting through their window, seeing if Renee's conversation with the Cullen's was going well. The last thing she needed was Renee to get mad at the Cullen's and completely change her mind, deciding to take Bella to Canada with her and Phil instead. The thought sent chills up her spine, down to her toes and through her fingertips.

"Isabella?" Edward's voice brought her back to reality. "Are you okay?"

Bella shook her head. "No, but I'm getting there." She felt him stare. When she glanced at Edward, she saw a look in his eye that was filled with confusion and something else. She couldn't recognize it, and it was like Edward couldn't either. How curious. "Is there something on my face?"

"Huh?" Edward's brows furrowed.

"Well, you're looking at me funny. Do I have like a zit or something …"

"No, you're perfect."

"… Because let me tell you something. Zits are completely normal for teenagers … Wait, did you say something?"

"I said," He sighed. "That there's nothing on your face. I was just worried, that's all."

Bella bit her lip. She could have sworn she heard him say something else, but she let it go. He obviously didn't want her to hear it. "Oh, okay. Well, let's get my things before Phil shows up. I don't want you here if he arrives."

"Why?"

"You know why."

"Part of it, you didn't really explain it earlier, though," Edward said.

Bella sighed. "Well, for one, he might hurt me. And two, he could hurt you as well. That wouldn't sit right with me, knowing that somebody else got hurt because of my doing." Bella couldn't stand the thought, the _guilt, _of having someone else stuck in the same situation she was in simply because he, or she, was with her. It would be the epitome of being at the wrong place at the wrong time.

"I think I can handle Phil," Edward said confidently. "Don't worry about me, or yourself. I'll keep you safe, always."

_He'll keep me safe? He'll _always _keep me safe? Somebody please tell me that I heard that wrong …_

"What I meant is, is that I'll protect you because, um, because what he's doing is wrong. Um, you know?" Edward stuttered as he ran a hand through his hair. No, she didn't know. What the hell was Edward trying to say? "What you've been through shouldn't have happened and I feel like I should have known something was up because we're fucking neighbors …"

"Edward, It's okay. I get it, "_ Just please shut the fuck up. _"Come on, it's cold outside."

He didn't give a coherent reply, his words were muffled. However, it sounded something along the lines of 'what the fuck is wrong with me?'

Bella twisted the doorknob and stepped through the unlocked door. The house was just as she left it hours before, except the floors were rid of her blood and the air smelled of bleach. It made her sick, sick to her core. They were covering up the evidence, covering up the truth. She felt the corner of her eyes sting with water and she swallowed to hold them back. She already cried enough today, in front of Edward, no less. He already felt bad for her, she didn't need any more sympathy. She needed to stay strong and try to move past what had transpired in this house. She needed to find out more about Charles Garland. Bella needed to know that there was a decent man out there, and that he was her father.

But she had to be strong first. She couldn't cry if she wanted such a trait.

"Nice place," Edward commented, his eyes roaming the many paintings that hung on the walls. His comment made her scoff, since it was anything _but _pleasant. Bella guessed to anyone else, her house seemed normal. However, she couldn't stand the look of her house. Everywhere she turned, she could remember what happened in that corner or hallway and how she got hurt.

Edward stepped closer to a painting that was nearest the staircase. It was the painting of New York City at night. The Empire State Building, the Statue of Liberty, Central Park – it was all there. Everything seemed so bright, so alive. Bella wondered what it would be like to walk through the streets of NYC – going to Broadway shows, taking the subway. It seemed so fascinating. Visiting New York was one of Bella's dreams, and she couldn't wait to go once she graduated from high school and left the shit hole that was the town of Forks. However, whenever she saw this painting, she wanted to spit on it. She wanted to kick a hole through it and burn it. It was garbage to her. Pure garbage.

The thought of the painting made Bella clutch her left leg. She remembered when Phil had gotten mad at her for not retrieving his alcohol soon enough for him. He had a bad day at work, something about a new guy stealing the spotlight. The Swans were wealthy, both Renee and Phil had come from money, and Phil's job paid well. Bella didn't understand why Phil would be worried, but she obliged when he asked her to get him some alcohol from the basement.

At first, she grabbed his usual – a bottle of tequila. But after hearing how shitty Phil felt, Bella grabbed the whiskey instead. However, she wasn't sure if she should just stick with the tequila. She didn't want to get it wrong because she knew that Phil wouldn't be impressed. After a couple of minutes of analyzing, Bella decided to just take both upstairs and let Phil decide.

Once she was upstairs, Bella walked to the kitchen to get a glass. She hadn't even opened the cupboard before a strong hand gripped her shoulder and whipped her around. Phil had an annoyed and frustrated emotion expressed along his face. Bella gulped and tried to hide her horror. Her heartbeat had quickened, knowing what was going to happen. But she didn't understand. What had she done wrong? She did as he asked, even more! She retrieved two different kinds of alcohol, to which he could do as he pleased, and yet he stood over her with such malice.

"You kept me waiting," he had seethed. "You knew how shitty day my day had been, and you took your _damn time._"

"I-I-I," Bella took a deep breath to cease her stuttering. "I didn't know which one you wanted, Dad. I got you both just in case. Please don't be mad."

Phil searched her eyes to see if she was lying. She looked back, all the while trying not to fall apart. There was a moment when his eyes softened, as if realizing that Bella was telling the truth. But just as quickly as it came, it was replaced with a dark and accusing gaze. "Were you drinking, Bella? Is that why you were taking so long?"

Bella shook her head violently. "No! I'm only fifteen, Dad."

"Stop lying to me!" He yelled, throwing her to the ground. "You're always lying, and it needs to stop. I'm warning you now, Bella. There is no lying in this house."

"But I'm not lying," Bella pleaded, trying to convince Phil that she was being truthful. "I swear."

"_Stop it!_"

A searing pain bolted into Bella's left thigh. She cried as Phil's foot crushed her, begging him to stop. The more she wailed, the more pressure he put. She shut her mouth and let the tears escape – it was all she could do. She couldn't win; Phil was already convinced that Bella had taken a sip of his alcohol. Bella wondered why he wouldn't believe her, since she had done nothing to make him think that she was an ungrateful child who disrespected her parents. As long as she could remember, Bella had always tried her hardest to prove to them that she would never take them for granted and that she had manners. It was exhausting, if anything. And as Phil added more pressure, Bella realized that she shouldn't have been trying so hard. There was no point.

Bella pressed her cheek against the cool tile floor. It was cold, and it helped her relax a little as she waited for Phil to ease his foot, but not by much. She couldn't feel her leg anymore – the pressure was cutting off her circulation, almost ridding of the pain she had felt not too long ago. Bella feared that she would never have feeling in her left leg again.

It felt like hours before Phil finally lifted his foot. Bella sobbed as she grabbed her leg, rubbing her thigh to make sure that it would be okay. It wasn't broken, but he had put enough pressure to make it sore for a week or two. Suddenly, a spring of whiskey and scotch showered Bella. She gasped and covered her head, bringing her knees to her chest as more alcohol flowed down her body. Bella wiped her eyes when the last drop had fallen into her hair.

"I hope that satiated your temptations," Phil said, his voice rough and monotone. "Now get out of my sight, you stealing little bitch."

Bella obliged without hesitation, clutching the countertop as she shakily got off the ground. She didn't look at Phil as she walked away, clutching her left thigh all the while. Bella grabbed a pack of ice from the freezer as Phil left to go to the basement. She could hear him muttering profanities and curses about how his daughter was such a failure. Bella shook her head and shut the freezer door, her mind shooting her own profanities in reply.

She bit the inside of her cheek as she trudged up the stairs, trying to ignore the pain in her thigh. It didn't cease even when she had reached the top of the staircase. It only hurt more. Bella was about to turn down the hallway to her bedroom when she heard _'Dancing Queen' _coming from another room. The sound beamed from her parent's room. The door was slightly open and Bella peered inside. There, Renee stood. She was standing in front of a canvas and dancing as she painted with different colors and strokes. She was singing to the damn song as she painted. It was New York. Her mother was painting New York as her daughter went through hell only a story below.

Bella turned on her heel, the right one, and made her way to her bedroom – her safe haven. Once inside, Bella left the lights off and walked towards her mirror. What she saw disappointed her. Her bedroom window allowed the moonlight to peek in. Her usually pale skin was tinted with a light shade of blue, her white shirt now stained with yellow liquid. Bella sniffed her hair and crinkled her nose. She smelled like a bar. She took off her jeans with caution and looked in the mirror again. This time, she looked at what Phil had left behind.

A bruise. A fucking bruise that was so black that just the sight of it made Bella want to vomit. It was so large; it looked like it was spreading all over her thigh. She looked away and put her hand to her mouth, trying to contain her sobs. She didn't want to look in the mirror, didn't want to see the product of what Phil had done. Bella limped to her bed and shifted under the sheets. She didn't care that she was still in her stained shirt or that her hair and body reeked. She didn't mind that she was in her panties. She only placed her pack of ice onto her bruise.

It was a funny thing – what made her angry wasn't what Phil accused her of, and it wasn't the rain of alcohol. It wasn't his hurtful words or his physical abuse. It was what Renee had done, or what she _hadn't _done. While Bella was crying in pain, Renee was dancing in her bedroom painting. It was like Bella's hurt didn't matter to her, so all she did was jam to _ABBA_ and re-create New York City. It pained Bella to know that her own mother would do nothing to help her. It was a realization that she was alone in this world, and no one would ever care for her.

"Mom painted that," Bella told Edward, desperately wanting to forget what that painting meant to her – the epiphany it had presented. "She did most of the paintings in the house."

Edward nodded. "She's good. Really good."

"Well, she had a lot of time to perfect her skills," Bella said bitterly.

"What do you mean …"

"Let's just get my stuff, yeah?" Bella cut Edward off. She wasn't ready to tell him that story yet. She had just relived it, and needed some time to recover.

Bella ran up the stairs, Edward in tow. When she opened the door to her room, Bella felt a little self-conscious. Yes, Edward had already been inside, but that was when she was at his house taking a shower. She had no idea what he thought of her room, since most rooms said so much about a person. One sweep of Bella's room and people would say she was boring, which she kind of was. She had a desk, which was still just as messy as it had been the last time she left it. Along the wall, opposite the closet, was her vanity. It was probably the girliest part of her bedroom. On top was many perfumes and lotions, a jewelry box, a bowl for her rings, and a small cabinet for her hair accessories. She had a curling iron, a flat iron, and a blow dryer hanging neatly along the edge with their respective holders. Her queen sized bed had bright purple sheets with fluffy pillows, a copy of _The Notebook _placed on her nightstand. It was one of her favorite books. Bella had drawers full with clothes and a flat screen television, as well as a walk in closet that always seemed to be constantly filled with Renee's conquests. To others, not only would she seem boring, but she would also seem like a normal teenage girl with a logical room.

No one was aware of all the tears that were spilled in this room, all the wounds tended. She had many dreams, and most of them were conjured inside her bedroom. Bella always knew that she would be leaving as soon as graduation hit, and would in no way turn back. She had prepared herself for that very moment. There were no photographs of good memories or items that reminded her of any occasion. She had none of those. The only person who knew of this was staring back at her in the full-length mirror Renee had gotten her. That damned mirror that she despised so much showed a girl that carried so much hurt and grief, a girl who knew all of her secrets and fears. And for that, she turned away and walked straight to her closet to retrieve a suitcase.

Bella gathered all of her hair over one shoulder and quickly began throwing the basics into the suitcase. Her toiletries were already at the Cullen's, and a handful of clothes thanks to Edward. She threw in more jeans and shirts, as well as sweaters and pajamas. Bella even packed her jewelry box. She wasn't sure if she was going to be able to come back once Phil and Renee left the country, so Bella decided she would bring all the things she knew, or thought she knew, she couldn't live without. It wasn't long before her suitcase was close to overflowing did Bella let out a loud sigh.

"All those times I saw you crying in here," Edward whispered. "I thought it was because of what happened at school. But it wasn't just that, was it?"

"I did cry over what people said, but rarely. It was usually over the stuff that happened in this house," Bella closed her eyes.

"I will never forgive myself for what I had caused, Isabella. All the ridicule you went through was because of a misunderstanding, and I handled it like a true asshole. And to learn that you were … you were _physically _hurt and I didn't know. God. I wish I wasn't such a dick. I would have seen what was happening sooner if I just opened my fucking eyes – "

"Edward …"

" – I could see you through my own bedroom window. All those times you cried was because of the pain and I was stupid enough to think that you were emotional over school. I even fucking _enjoyed _it. I'm such a monster. If I had known the truth, things would have been so different – "

"Edward, stop," Bella held her hand up, making him shut his mouth. "We've both made mistakes, and we will continue to make mistakes. We're seventeen, and we're not perfect. I already forgave you, so stop beating yourself up. Please?"

Instead of answering, Edward walked over to her bed and grabbed her suitcase. He gaited out of her bedroom, leaving her all alone. His footsteps thumped against the stairs, fading until she heard the front door slam. Bella didn't know if Edward was upset or angry. Either way, she felt guilty for making him feel whatever the hell he was feeling.

Bella wasn't going to lie – she was beyond pissed that the reason Edward had treated her so coldly was because of a lie that Rosalie had told him. It was ridiculous to even think that Tyler Crowley would give up Rosalie for her, but it was down right stupid to treat Bella like shit for something like that. Bella wanted to stay mad at Edward, because she had every right to. And she wanted to do the same thing to him as he had to her because, again, she had every fucking right to. However, Bella couldn't bring herself to feel that way. Esme's words kept on repeating in her mind, and that's what was stopping her from despising Edward.

All her life, she had never met anyone who would go to such lengths for loved ones. Not Phil, not Renee … no one. It angered Bella that she couldn't just continue hating Edward, but she knew in her heart that what she had learned about him made him seem like a completely new person.

Bella hated that. Hated knowing that what she used to know wasn't real, and that she had only been viewing through accusing eyes. Now that she could see clearly, it scared her. It made her want to fucking hide.

She sighed and rubbed her forehead. It was time for her to leave as well. Bella grabbed her copy of _The Notebook, _and her shoebox of money from her closet when she saw something outside her window. She squinted and walked closer, and gasped. It was Edward. Bella had seen Edward many times through this window, but she had never seem him like this before. He usually had a smirk on his face or a glare, but neither of those expressions was on display this time. Now he looked much older, his face lined with guilt and sadness. And fear. For once, Edward was an open book. She could see him so clearly, almost like he had offered her all of his emotions. His distress presented secrets, and because Bella had so many, she didn't want to see. Bella didn't know what to do. All she could do was press her hand to the glass and sigh.

"You're all set?" A voice asked, startling Bella. She whipped around and put her hand to her chest when she saw it was Renee. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

Bella cleared her throat and nodded. "I'm just about to leave."

"The Cullen's have agreed to let you stay with them. I offered to pay them but they wouldn't accept it. Isn't that nice of them?"

Bella didn't reply.

"I gave Esme the keys to you car, I figured you must have missed it. I also left a key to the house in case you needed anything," Renee said.

Bella only stared – she was growing impatient.

Renee sighed and gulped. "I love you very much, Bella. And your father, your _real _father, does too. I'm sorry that you never met him and that Phil has treated us so badly. In time you will see my side of things. Once everything blows over, I _will _come back for you. We can start fresh and have a normal life. I promise."

Even though Renee's statement seemed so sincere, Bella looked down. She couldn't handle any more lies. "I should get going," Bella mumbled. "You should, too."

"O-okay, honey," Renee stuttered, her voice sounding strained. "Just take care of yourself. And take care of that box. I know you have dreams, Bella. I did too. So don't give up okay? And when you're ready, open it and own your life."

With those words, Renee stepped out of Bella's room and towards her own.

Bella had nothing else to say to her mother, and was glad that she was the one to give the last word. One more glance towards her window, and Bella saw that Edward was gone. His bedroom light was on, but he was nowhere to be seen. Bella didn't know why she was disappointed. What did she expect? That Edward would continue to stand by his window until she left? It was ridiculous, and Bella laughed at herself for thinking such thoughts.

She held onto her book and shoebox tightly against her chest as she exited her home, running across the lawn as the rain picked up. The Cullen's had left the door unlocked, probably for her. Inside, a single lamp was left on, no one was in the kitchen or in the living room. From previous nights, Bella learned that Esme and Carlisle turned in early. As for Edward, well, Bella didn't really know where the fuck he was. She wasn't even sure if she cared. In fact, Bella didn't know why she was dwelling on whether or not she cared about Edward's whereabouts.

Bella ran up the stairs towards the guest bedroom, closing the door behind her. She looked around her and noticed how lived in it seemed than the first night she stayed here. Her textbooks were sprawled all over the desk, the bed still unmade from the morning. Her eyes landed on her suitcase – it was empty. Bella walked over to her closet. It was full. She glanced at the vanity and gasped when her lotions and styling tools and jewelry box were placed in the exact same way as it had been back in her other bedroom.

Edward had unpacked for.

Bella wondered if she should thank him. He didn't have to unpack her things – she wouldn't have had a problem. But still, it was awfully thoughtful of him. This sudden kindness was so strange and foreign. Never in a million years would Bella have believed that Edward Cullen would actually be kind. And yet, it didn't seem abnormal either. She wondered why, since all she had known of Edward, before, was that he was an egotistical jerk. He had done her more wrongs than rights. And still, it seemed that his rights shined brighter than his wrongs. Everything he had done for her – Bella would be eternally grateful. Would she ever forget the hell that Edward had put her through? No, of course not. Those times of torment would forever be a part of her. But did she want to move on? Yes, she did. Edward had proven that he was more than what he had to offer.

It was obvious now. Bella really, and truly, forgave Edward. She _felt_ forgiveness. Before, when she said it, she didn't know if she was saying it for Edward or because she wanted to skip the subject. But now she knew. She forgave Edward for _herself. _She forgave him because she needed to move on. Renee and Phil were leaving the country, and Bella was free of the abuse she had gone through for most of her life. She had Alice, a girl who she could claim as her best friend.

And now, she had a savior.

Bella felt the drowsiness dawn on her, and decided to thank Edward in the morning. She placed _The Notebook _on the night table and stuffed the box under the bed before changing into sweats and a t-shirt. She went to the bathroom and brushed her teeth, glancing at the mirror one last time. She noticed that something in her reflection seemed different. Bella yawned and decided not to dwell on it. She stepped out of the bathroom, only to bump right into Edward. Bella almost screamed in shock when he pressed his palm against her mouth.

"Shhh! My parents are sleeping," Edward whispered.

Bella blinked once before grabbing his wrist and taking his hand off her mouth. "Sorry. You just surprised me." Edward opened his mouth to say something when Bella held up a finger. "And don't apologize."

To her surprise, Edward chuckled. The smile actually reaching his eyes. "Okay, I won't. You heading to bed?"

"Yeah. It's been a busy day, you know?"

"I can only imagine," Edward grimaced, before changing his expression. "Well, I'll see you in the morning."

"You're not tired?

"Oh, I am. I just want to play the piano before I head off."

"I see," Bella said just as Edward sauntered past her, towards the flight of stairs. "Hey, Edward."

His one foot was on the first step, his hand on the banister when he looked at her and said, "Yeah?"

Before Bella knew what she was doing, she walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. He seemed shocked, hell, she was shocked too, and stood still for a while. Bella was about to pull back when she felt his warm hands place themselves on her back, pulling her closer. Her cheek was pressed against his chest, and Bella couldn't help but smell a hint of cinnamon. It was Edward's smell, and it made her skin tingle. It was weird, but she didn't want to pull away …

Until she did.

"What was that for?" Edward asked.

Bella shrugged. "For saving me numerous of times. For not being the person I thought you were. For lots of things."

"You don't need to thank me. And that hug, it was … it was nice," Edward grinned.

Bella felt her cheeks warm and she began to turn towards the guest room. "Good night, Edward."

"Good night, Isabella. Sweet dreams."

Bella closed the door behind her and crept under the sheets, bringing it over her shoulders. She wondered what had come over her when she hugged Edward. It should have felt weird, but it didn't. In a way, it felt … right. Bella tossed onto her other side when she thought this, because she was so unsure of what was happening. Her mind was in jumbles, and she just _hugged _Edward. And he fucking hugged her back. To make matters worse, she didn't mind that he wrapped his arms around her. There was a stirring within her, and Bella didn't know how to take control of it. So she shut her eyes, and let the muffled sounds of the piano lull her to sleep.

"You too, Edward. Sweet dreams to you, too." She whispered before she finally rested.

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**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

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**I'm so glad that I was able to update this in a week. I seriously think I can do this weekly update thing during the summer. It's going to be fun :)**

**How do you feel about Renee and Phil's leaving? What about Edward's refusal to be forgiven? Have any more questions, feel free to ask me via review or message!**

**This is something I would like to address. So lately I have been getting messages and reviews telling me my writing is immature and that this story is unrealistic to the point where it is ridiculous. Some have told me to just stop writing it all together. With that being said, I will NEVER stop writing this story, until it comes to it's rightful conclusion. My writing may be immature, but I'm just going to remind everyone and say that I am SIXTEEN. I'm young and willing to improve because writing is something that I love to do. As for this story being ridiculous: okay. The way these characters are going about situations is not rational in any way, but then again, I am writing about people around my age. They're confused and scared, they're not thinking straight. Of course the authorities will get involved and of course Bella will seek medical help. I'm not stupid. I do have a bit of reality, thank you very much. So for those who told me, though they didn't really need to tell me, that they stopped reading this story for any of these reasons, then i apologize. I do not mean to waste your time.**

**Okay, now that that's over with, I want to thank those who have been SUPPORTING me from the beginning. Even those who just discovered this story. Your continuous support and love is what gets me through these flamers. YOU are the ones that matter to me. I love writing for you, and I'm so glad we are able to go on this journey together. I don't know how many more times I can tell you that I love you all. This story's success is all thanks to you!**

**Regarding 'Escape Meadow': Many of you want to see this story posted, which makes me thrilled! I've been going over the plot and I just want to say that the summary I provided for you in the last chapter is completely different from the story I have planned. It'll be different, but still the same in so many ways. I'm really excited to get started, and I hope I can post it soon :)**

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**See you next week & much love,**

**Karina.**


	14. Chapter Fourteen: Confession

**Disclaimer:** I do not own twilight, but I do own a yummy batch of butterscotch brownies made by yours truly :)

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_And I wanna be free _

_Wind in my hair _

_Salt on my skin _

_Sun in the air _

_I have to feel love _

_Holding on me _

_I'll give you everything that you would ever need_

**_Free - Gavin DeGraw_**

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Chapter Fourteen: Confession

_**Bella**_

It was six in the morning, and Bella thought it was crazy how she was even able to open her eyes at such an ungodly hour on a Saturday. She usually got up early for school – the unfortunate details of being a girl was trying to be presentable. Though no one at Forks, besides Alice, really cared about how Bella looked – but on a Saturday? It must have been fucking opposite day.

Bella groaned and rolled onto her stomach, stuffing her face in between the plush pillows and inhaling the smell of clean sheets. She then tossed onto her good side, then onto her back. Bella repeated the cycle for a good half hour before slowly rising out of bed, scratching the back of her head. She crossed her legs under the sheets and huffed. Bella could feel her exhaustion, and it was frustrating her that she wasn't able to gain the rest that her body desperately craved. Her limbs were sore and her side ached, and yet, she sat on top of the bed with her eyes wide open.

Then she smiled. Bella knew the reason she couldn't go to sleep was from the high of freedom.

She had dreamed that she was running through a field. She was in a pretty blue dress and her hair was let down. With colorful balloons in the air she jumped as she ran. The field never seemed to end and Bella didn't care. She was running and no one was stopping her. No one brought her down or discouraged her. It was just Bella, the clear blue skies, the bright sun kissing her cheeks, and her thoughts. It was wonderful. Bella would never forget that dream. It was her subconscious reminding her that Phil and Renee had left. They wouldn't be coming back, and if they did, Bella would call the police. It was a good feeling, being in control. Bella never really had that before.

Sighing, she ripped the sheets off her body and got out of bed. The sun was beginning to rise, and Bella couldn't remember the last time she witnessed a sunrise without a voice in the back of her head telling her to be cautious. That's because this was the first time that Bella was free – free of pain and neglect. Free of worries and horrors. She could watch the sun rise without her subconscious telling her to be careful.

The sky was painted in yellows, pinks, and purples. The inside of the guest room illuminated a soft orange. Bella leaned against the windowsill with her arms crossed as she looked over the view of Forks. Bella was aware that one of the perks of living in such a wealthy neighborhood was the spectacular view of the town. On occasions when Phil and Renee would go on vacation and leave Bella behind, she would sit outside on the porch and read. Forks was so green, so fresh and pure. If there was one thing she would miss about the town it was the scenery, but everything else within it was something that Bella was excited to leave behind.

Bella walked away from the window and twirled, she fucking _twirled,_ and she didn't care how ridiculous and cliché it seemed. She was too damn happy to worry.

She was careful to be quiet as she walked down the hallway and into the bathroom. She smelled of the rain from last night, and Bella couldn't stand it. She turned on the shower and stripped of her sweats. Her side was still sore, and probably would be for a few weeks. Bella was cautious of the way she rose her arms to relieve herself of her baggy shirt. She let out a content sigh as she stepped under the steaming water. The feeling of the water spilling down her body was amazing. She closed her eyes and grinned, relishing the feeling of being relaxed. Once she was finished, she wrapped a towel around her body. She opened the bathroom door, a sudden rush of cool air seeping into the room. She shuddered slightly and watched as the steam inside the room seemed to swirl. Bella eventually left because she figured if anyone saw her they would think she was either high or just easily amused.

Bella tiptoed to the guest room, and when she closed the door behind her, she dressed into a black knit jumper. Alice had insisted that she get it that day when they went to Port Angeles. It had a v-neck, a self-tie belt around the waist and harem style pant legs with cuffed hems. However, it was sleeveless, and since she lived in Forks Bella slipped into a beige, blue, and red tribal patterned cardigan. What she was wearing was comfy and fashionable. The tribal trend was in, right?

Fuck it. Bella was comfy and far too lazy to change now.

After slipping on a pair of white flats, Bella headed over to the mirror. She grabbed her eye shadow when she caught her reflection. Bella touched the area around her eye and gasped. The bruising was almost gone, becoming a yellow so pale that it was barely even visible. Only those who knew about it would notice that it was still there. Either way, it made Bella smile and ditch the eye shadow. She only put eyeliner on the top, and some mascara on both her top and bottom lashes. Bella applied some gloss and then stared at the mirror. Her hair was damp, slowly drying into its natural soft waves. For once, Bella was happy with the way she looked. She looked fresh.

God, if she knew how good it would feel to stand up for herself in front of Phil, she would have done it years ago. But how was Bella supposed to know back then? Phil was terrifying, and whenever she was around him, Bella lost her common sense and was taken over by fear. However, that would no longer happen. For Phil and Renee had left the country and evidently left Bella be.

Bella glanced at the clock. 7:30. She couldn't simply sit in her room until someone woke up, that would be pathetic. Bella shrugged and stepped out of the guest room and bounded down the stairs. The house was the quietest Bella ever witnessed since she had been staying. She was afraid that the tiniest sound would wake everyone up. However, remembering that if the Cullen's house was anything like hers, then no one would be bothered because the house was so large. That could be both a good and bad thing. A good thing in this house, a bad thing for the house next door.

She shook her head of the thought and walked over to the kitchen. Her hand skimmed the cold, granite counter before her eyes landed on the fridge. Bella could make breakfast, she thought. It could be a chance to finally show the Cullen's her gratitude, especially since they were taking her in. She never really asked them to do such a thing, she only told them her story. And yet, they didn't hesitate to keep her safe. Bella would be forever grateful. Making them breakfast would please her, and she certainly had nothing to do so early on a Saturday morning, so it would occupy her as well.

Bella stared at the open fridge. She didn't know what to make. Eggs. Bacon. Pancakes.

She decided to make all. She had all morning, anyways. And if they were running low Bella wouldn't mind paying for some groceries. So she pulled out the carton of eggs and the package of bacon, as well as going through both the pantry and the fridge for the ingredients regarding the pancakes. While she got the pan heated, Bella started the batter for pancakes. It wasn't until she was about to make the first one did Bella remember to put chocolate chips. She hadn't had it in a while, and they were her favorite.

It was also Edward's favorite. Though she didn't know why she cared.

She hummed as she cooked. For her cooking was relaxing, and she didn't know why she didn't do it more often. Bella promised herself to do it as much as she could, because now she was free to do so. As time passed and Bella cooked, she found her humming turn into actual songs. In no way could Bella actually sing. In fact, Bella would probably lose if there was a karaoke competition. Well, she probably would have lost because no one would vote her since everyone alienated her –

"Smells good. What are you cooking?" Edward's voice echoed from behind her.

Bella pulled out the last batch from the pan and placed it onto the plate before shutting off the stove. She turned around and put the plate of bacon beside the eggs and pancakes. She waved her hands over the three plates and sighed. "I hope you're hungry. I didn't know what your family liked."

"They'll like it no matter what, Isabella. You didn't have to make breakfast," he said. "But for me I'll have those pancakes. Chocolate chip is my …"

"… Favorite," Bella looked up at Edward and averted her eyes down just as quick. He was wearing plaid pajama pants and was shirtless. No fucking shirt, and he looked _good_. Bella couldn't describe why her heart suddenly began to beat so quickly, but she hoped that her cheeks didn't turn bright red. The fuck was going on? "They're, my favorite too. I remembered you told me when you …"

"… Made pancakes. I remember," Edward scratched the back of his head.

_So, what. We're finishing each other's fucking sentences now? Some shit is seriously happening, _Bella told herself. She cleared her throat and pulled out two clean plates, handing one to Edward before digging in. They ate in silence, and Bella felt awkward. She wondered if Edward felt the same way.

"What was it like, thinking that you were going to die?" Edward asked. It was a question Bella didn't hear anyone but herself ask, and she was taken aback by it.

"I-I don't really know," Bella's mouth felt dry. "I guess I kind of just accepted it. My life hasn't been easy, so death didn't seem so bad."

"And do you still think that way?"

"What, that I'd rather be dead than alive?" Edward nodded and Bella clicked her tongue. "No. I don't think being dead is a good thing. I'm glad I'm still here."

"Good. That's good," Edward said before putting another pancake onto his plate. "These are excellent, by the way."

Bella grinned, relieved that he changed the subject. "Thanks." She rinsed her plate when she was finished. "I, um, I'll be right back."

Edward muttered something but she couldn't decipher it since his mouth was full with food. Bella headed upstairs, passing by both Esme and Carlisle on the way. She explained that she made them breakfast, in which Esme said that she didn't have to do it. Bella only waved it off and told her she didn't mind, and then continued on her way.

Bella was still flustered as she brushed her teeth. With Edward shirtless and his hair a complete mess, his random questions and their finishing each other sentences, Bella gripped onto the sink. She spit and rinsed her mouth. When did Edward suddenly make her so nervous? She usually knew how to act around him, since she despised him. She would present that hate because his feelings were mutual. But now that Edward and Bella had cleared up the misunderstanding, everything was different. Edward didn't hate her. Bella didn't hate him. So what did that make them?

Knowing she didn't have an answer, Bella pushed herself off the sink and went back downstairs. She was descending when she heard Carlisle say something about doing the right thing.

"We have waited too long. It's time," He said. "Oh, Edward. Don't forget your appointment today. Noon."

Bella heard a cupboard close.

"I know, Dad," Edward sighed. "It's not like I can really skip it."

The room drew silent, and that's when Bella figured it was safe to enter the kitchen once again. She bounded down the steps, her cheeks flushing when all three pairs of eyes fell on her. "How was breakfast?" she asked tentatively.

"Wonderful!" Esme gushed. "But Bella please don't worry about treating us. It's our job to treat you."

"It was no trouble at all," Bella said. "It's the least I could do, especially since you're allowing me to stay with you for so long. I'm truly grateful for your family."

Carlisle cleared his throat. "About you living with us. While we are happy that you're here, and you're safe, the fact of the matter is that your mother and fath – "

"Phil."

"Right. Anyways, they have both _fled _the country. First of all, what that man was doing to you was wrong, but now they left because they don't want to get caught," Carlisle explained. "Esme and I were talking last night after your mother left and we both think it's best if we go to the police and …"

"No," Bella protested. "That's not necessary."

"Your privacy will be kept. We'll request to the police that they do this quietly, if that's what you're worried about," Carlisle said.

"Bella, dear," Esme whispered, touching her hand. "We can't watch the people who hurt you walk away. It's not right, and it doesn't bring you justice. Please, we only want what's best for you."

Bella felt conflicted. Of course she wanted Phil in jail and for Renee to get what she deserved, but she wasn't ready for that. Not until she found Charles Garland. Yet, there was Esme and Carlisle practically begging her to take her to the authorities. She knew that they were never okay with the idea of not going to the police immediately the night she first told them her story, and they still respected her wishes. Maybe it was time to respect _their_ wishes, since they had already done so much for her. And Carlisle did mention how they would request that the case be sought quietly, so Bella could still search for her biological father.

The freedom she had right now was temporary. Carlisle and Esme's offer would ensure that she could live without fear for the rest of her life.

Bella nodded her head slowly. "Okay. I'll do it. But only if someone comes with me."

"Of course, dear! We wouldn't have it any other way," Esme said, squeezing Bella's hand. "Carlisle actually has to go to work, but I can drive you. I'll be there with you as long as you need me, does that sound okay?"

"Alright," Bella agreed.

"Good," Esme turned to Edward then. "Honey, we'll be back to pick you up for your appointment."

"Okay, Mom,"

Esme was leading Bella out the door, keys in hand when she turned around and said, "And please go put on a shirt."

"Yes, Mom," Edward rolled his eyes.

Bella was one foot out the door when she looked back at Edward. He was behind the counter, but was watching her. With his arms crossed over his bare chest, he lifted one thumb and mouthed, _'good luck,' _with a reassuring grin. Bella smiled nervously in reply and closed the door behind her.

**x x x x x x**

Bland.

That was the word Bella conjured to describe the Forks Police Station. There was nothing complicated about it – a lobby, a room full of cubicles with absolutely _no _phones ringing, a kitchen, and two private rooms that Bella figured was used for interrogation. Or some shit. All the walls were white and the air smelled of coffee. It looked nothing like the police stations on TV, but then again, nothing truly happened in Forks. So she guessed it was okay if the building wasn't tasteful in any way.

At the moment, Bella was sitting inside one of the private rooms. She sat on a metal chair and had her hands folded on top of a steel table. Esme was sitting beside her, just like she had promised. The walls in this room were tufts blue, and it didn't smell like coffee. The light would flicker from time to time, and Bella wanted to throw her shoe at it. It seemed like it would take forever for someone to show up. All Bella wanted to do was tell her side of the story and leave. Whatever the police planned to do with that information was up to them. She yawned and stretched her arms out in front of her; now she wished that she had forced herself to sleep in.

"Are you nervous?" Esme asked, breaking the silence.

"Not really. Bored and anxious maybe, but not nervous," Bella sighed. "What do you think they're going to ask me?"

"I haven't a clue. Just so long as you tell them everything and you say it with truth, you should be fine."

Bella looked at Esme, and smiled. "Thank you for being here, Esme. It really means a lot."

Esme rubbed Bella's arm gently. "It's no problem, Bella. I'm just glad that you agreed to do this. You're doing the right thing, you know that?"

"Yeah," Bella whispered. "Yeah, I do."

The door swung open and Bella jumped. A man with sandy blonde hair and bright blue eyes walked in with two police officers by his side. He was clad in a grey suit and a navy tie, his identification card clasped to his breast pocket. He had slight stubble, almost like he didn't have time to shave in the morning. He stood on the opposite end of the table with a sort of professional grin that said that he was friendly, but if he had to, he was ready to pull out his gun.

"Good morning, I'm Detective Newton," He greeted, leaning over the table to offer his hand. "And you two are?"

Esme took his hand first, giving it a good shake. "I'm Esme Cullen."

"Dr. Cullen's wife?" Esme nodded. "Fine man, that Dr. Cullen. It's nice to meet you."

"Likewise," Esme said, putting her arms around Bella. "And this here, is Bella Swan."

Bella stood from her chair and gave Detective Newton a shake. His grip was firm. "Nice to meet you," she whispered.

Detective Newton grinned in her direction before letting go of her hand. When everyone sat down he scratched his jaw and took a look at his clipboard. "I understand that we are here in Miss Swan's behalf?"

"That's correct, sir," Bella confirmed.

"And why don't you explain to me why you are here."

Bella gulped and glanced at Esme, who gave her a reassuring smile. "I've been abused," she said, her voice cracking.

Detective Newton leaned forward. "Sexual abuse or …"

"No, no," Bella shook her head. "Just physical abuse."

"I see. Now how long has this been going on for?"

"Since I was seven, so for ten years now," Bella answered.

"Okay," Detective Newton murmured as he scribbled onto his clipboard. "Now, Miss Swan, can you tell me who has been abusing you for ten years?"

Bella looked down at her hands and swallowed hard. She didn't think confessing was going to be so difficult. "P-Phil."

The drop of a pen made Bella's head shot up. Detective Newton's brows were now knit together and his lips in a straight line. "Phil, as in Phil Swan?" Bella just stared at him. "You'll have to excuse me, Miss Swan, but I find it hard to believe that the man who volunteers his time at the homeless shelter every week and organized the road clean-up is the man who abused you. Not to mention he's your father!"

"He's not!" Bella corrected, before clearing her throat. "I mean … he's _not _the man he's portrayed himself to be. For the past ten years he has hit me, kicked me, pulled my hair, thrown things at me, locked me in the basement, and called me horrible things. I've never done anything to him, and he still hurt me. You have to believe me."

Detective Newton sighed. "I'm sorry, Miss Swan. Unless you have evidence that Phil Swan has physically abused you, I'm afraid I can't help."

"But I do have evidence," Bella mumbled.

"Then by all means, show me."

Bella glanced at Esme before rising from her chair. She rolled up her sleeve to present her wrist. "This scar was from the time he gripped me so hard that I started to bleed." She pointed at her eye. "It's healing now, but a few weeks ago it was black because Phil pushed me into the banister."

As Bella showed all of her injuries and scars, Detective Newton wrote it down. She showed him everything from her head down to her toes, and each one she remembered how it had happened. The sloppy _s_-shaped scar on her foot was when Phil scratched her when she crawled away from him when she was thirteen. Her imperfect ring finger was when Phil stepped on her hand when she was eleven. The scar on her left shoulder arrived three weeks after she turned sixteen – Phil had pushed her into the wall, breaking one of the picture frames.

"Is there anything else?" Detective Newton asked.

"Um, yes." Bella was a little embarrassed when she had to roll down the top half of the jumper to expose her newly injured side. Esme gasped; Bella forgot that she hadn't seen it yet. "This was from yesterday."

"Bella, how …" Esme asked, her handing covering her mouth.

"Phil and Mom picked me up unexpectedly from school yesterday. Phil smashed wine glasses at me and was about to kick me before I told him that your family knew what was going on. That's why they left for Canada."

"Wait, Canada?" Detective Newton. "Are you telling me that Phil and Renee Swan have both fled the country?" Bella nodded, and he waved one of the police officers over. "Officer Clearwater is going to take pictures of your injuries, is that alright?"

"Yes."

As Officer Clearwater took photographs of every injury and scar, Bella felt that there wasn't a piece of skin that wasn't caught on camera. Bella felt hot tears well in her eyes, but she blinked them away. For ten years, she had been through hell and back, with the scars to prove it. Once he was done taking his pictures, Bella pulled on the top half of the jumper and slipped into her cardigan. She took her seat and sighed.

"Do you believe me now, Detective?"

"I do." He flipped through the pages of his clipboard. "But understand this, Miss Swan. Your case won't be easy. Phil is outside the country's borders, which means we're going to have to communicate with Canadian forces. Not to mention we don't even know which place in Canada he set out for, which means we're going to have track him via his credit cards and cell phone. And even if we do find him and are able to take him to court, you have a low chance of winning. Your only evidence is your battle scars and the Cullen's, and even they didn't truly witness what happened."

"Why are you telling me this?" Bella asked.

"I'm just preparing you for what's going to happen. However, I will do everything in my power to bring you justice. I promise you that," He said, his voice full and steady. "Now, is there anything else you would like to tell me?"

Esme caught Bella hesitate and heard her murmur, "Remember what I told you, Bella. Tell him everything. He only wants to help."

"Right," Bella nodded. "Then if you don't mind, could you step out of the room? I think it would be better if I said it in private," She glanced at the two police officers. "Just Detective Newton and I."

Esme obliged and patted Bella on the back while Detective Newton gave the officers permission to leave. When the door was shut, it was just the two of them, sitting on opposite ends of the steel table.

"So what is it that you needed to tell me, and only me?"

Bella scratched the back of her head. "I don't know if it will really help …"

"Every piece of information is vital, Miss Swan," he said.

"Okay, well," Bella mumbled. "Phil isn't my father. My biological father, I mean. That's why I was staying at the Cullen's. Not only could I not stand getting hurt anymore, but I couldn't stand living in the same house with a false man."

"Do you know who your real father is?"

"Not really."

"In any sense, I'm glad you told me," Detective Newton scribbled in the clipboard. "I'll respect your wishes and keep this case private. And I think it's best if you stay with Dr. Cullen and his family for the time being. If we have anymore information we'll contact them."

"So I'm done?" Bella asked, her voice too hopeful.

Detective Newton chuckled. "Yes, you're finished." He rose from his chair and led Bella towards the door. "I'm terribly sorry about what you have been through, Miss Swan. I hope everything goes smoothly from now on."

"You and me both, Detective." Bella stepped through the door and was met with the plain white walls and the aroma of caffeine. Detective Newton showed Bella back to the lobby, and gave her a final handshake before departing. She walked towards Esme and shrugged when she was standing in front of her. "That wasn't so bad."

Esme rose from her seat and hugged Bella. "I'm so proud of you!"

Esme and Bella soon left the police station to pick up Edward for his appointment. The car ride back was silent, and Bella was perfectly fine with it. Driving through the streets of Forks, she wondered what it would have been like if she grew up with Charles Garland instead Phil. Would they have even lived in the same place? It wouldn't have mattered, because she knew that she would have loved that life more than the one she was living now. She then knew that it was a good thing she didn't tell Detective Newton about her biological dad. While she hadn't truly lied when she told him that she didn't know her father, Bella could have at least given the detective his name. However, she didn't. And it was the right thing for _Bella_. While she was relieved that the police was going to do everything they could to bring Phil to his rightful punishment, she didn't want help in finding Charles. Finding her father was something Bella needed to do herself. Charles Garland was kept in the dark for seventeen years, and Bella needed to know _why._

Indeed, Bella was going to struggle on this journey for answers. But she hoped that on this journey, she would be able to find Charles. And with any luck, start over and live the life she never had.

* * *

**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

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**I'm on these sites all the time, follow me :)**

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**Happy (belated) birthday to almond94! I'm sorry I'm late, I tried really hard to get it up yesterday ... but yeah. I hope you had a great birthday though, and had TONS of cake!**

**I told you guys that Bella would eventually go to the cops. Not on her own will, but hey, at least she went! Not much Edward in this chapter, I know. It's weird; half of you really like how Edward is not how he's portrayed himself to be, and the other half still want Bella to rip his balls off. Also, I'm aware that many of you are curious about Charlie, or Charles Garland, and I'm just going to make it clear and say that he will definitely make it in this story. He won't for a while though. But he'll make it I promise. I sent him an invitation and he already RSVP'd :)**

**Excuse me. It's 1:30 in the morning - I'm a little delirious.**

**This is really important. I just want to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your kind reviews. You actually made me cry (in a good way, of course). When I was writing about the flamers in last week's A/N, I never expected for you guys to tell me how much they didn't matter and that you support this story 100%. I really don't know what I did to be blessed with such amazing and beautiful readers. I'm so, so thankful for you all. I really hope you believe that. You guys are my inspiration and I want you all to know that if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here. Message me on FF, hit me up on twitter, or message me on tumblr. I'll respond, I promise. You are all so important to me. I love you soooo much!**

**Oh, and I got my results from my bio diploma and guess what ... I did really well! Thanks to everyone who gave me tips and prayed for me. It helped.**

**Enough of this. This A/N is already long enough. I'll see you guys next week. REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!**

**Much love,**

**Karina.**


	15. Chapter Fifteen: Caught

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own ... measuring tape. I don't know, I was out of ideas haha.

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_It's coming down now._

_It's coming down now, harder than I've ever seen._

_It makes me want to run._

_It makes me want to run as fast as my heart beats._

**_Upside Down - Garrison Starr_**

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********KEEP THIS IN MIND PLEASE! **There's a short texting segment in this. It's super short, but just in case you get confused, I'm here to save you :) Alice is italicized, and Bella is bolded & italicized. Okay, that is all. Enjoy!

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Chapter Fifteen: Caught

_**Bella**_

"Edward, sweetie, we're outside," Esme said into her cell phone. "I don't care if you're still brushing your teeth. Spit and get out the door or else we're going to be late." In response, there was a grumbling coming from the other end of the line. "Edward Anthony Cullen if you are not inside this car within the next five minutes, your morning breath will be the _least_ of your worries."

Esme ended her call and Bella didn't know what to say. She wasn't even sure if she should say anything at all. She had never seen this side of Esme before – the impatient and anxious version. In return it was making Bella feel the same way, or maybe it was because she was still getting over the fact that she just told the fucking cops her life story. Either way, Bella didn't look at Esme in the eye. Instead she looked out the window, watching as droplets of rain began to descend from the sky.

Her eyes then traveled to the house next door – the home she had grown up in. There were no lights on inside the house, and Bella knew that it was because it was empty. Whenever it rained, Renee would always light some candles in fear that the power would get shut down. If someone were in the house, there would be a soft glow of light. But there wasn't, and there would never be a flicker of light inside that house again.

A muted sound of a door slamming shut awakened Bella of her thoughts. She looked up to see Edward throw his hood over his head before running to the car. Bella was about to get out and go in the backseat, but Edward must have read her mind and did a slight shake of his hand. He pulled open the backdoor and slipped inside. Bella simply shrugged and buckled her seat belt again.

"I made it," Edward sighed. "With two minutes to spare and good smelling breath."

"Good for you, son. Now buckle yourself in," Esme said as she backed out of the driveway and onto the road.

Another thing Bella learned about this version of Esme was that she drove very, _very _fast.

"Jesus, Mom," Edward gasped as Esme made a sharp turn. "Calm down, it's just an appointment."

"I know, honey."

"I have one every month."

"I _know_, honey."

"Okay, then slow down. If you love me and care for both mine and Bella's safety, you will ease off the gas pedal."

Esme sighed before the car began to slow down. Bella released her fingers and stretched them at the same time Edward let out a loud breath. When she was eavesdropping earlier, she heard Carlisle say Edward's appointment was at noon, so she wondered why Esme was in such a hurry. They were half an hour early, which would have been a good thing if they _didn't _live in Forks. The hospital was hardly ever busy, and Bella only knew this because of the times when Renee would burn her skin or cut her finger during her culinary phase and needed someone to drive her. Bella had never been to the hospital on her own account.

Once the car was parked and they stepped inside the hospital, Bella thought that Esme would relax. However, she was the opposite. Esme kept biting her lip and scratching her arm, her eyes constantly scanning her entire surrounding. Bella heard Edward grumble something before rolling her eyes, but she didn't dwell on it. Obviously there was something wrong, but she had her own problems to worry about.

Their shoes squeaked against the linoleum floors as they made their way to the front desk. Esme told Edward and Bella to take a seat while she signed in, and both of them obliged. Bella tapped her foot as she sat in her chair, her arms crossed over her chest. The waiting room was so … _quiet. _It was disturbingly quiet. It bothered her that the hospital was not as busy as the last time she had been here a year and a half ago. Bella didn't know if it irked her because that meant that Forks was a really healthy town, or if it was because it could possibly mean that there were people out there that didn't get the chance to seek medical help.

She hoped it wasn't the second option.

From the corner of her eye, Bella could see Edward tapping his fingers along the armrest and his right knee bobbing up and down. His mouth was straight and his jaw was set, his eyebrows knit together and his shoulders were relaxed. He looked calm, relaxed. Bella now believed him when he said he was a good actor. To anyone else, it would have seemed that Edward didn't have a care in the world, and that being here was the last of things he would be doing on a Saturday, but did it anyway because he really didn't give a fuck. However, his eyes gave him away. Those true green orbs were anxious. Through his eyes Bella could see that he was on the edge of bolting for the door.

"What kind of a appointment do you have?" Bella accusingly asked.

"Just a physical," Edward shrugged nonchalantly. "Why?"

"I was just wondering."

There must have been something else going on in that head of his, otherwise Edward wouldn't seem so nervous about a physical. However, Bella ignored her earlier inquiries. If she had learned anything about Edward in the past few weeks, it was that his mind was too difficult for her to read. As curious as his mystery made her, Bella let it go. Besides, he was probably stressing over something stereotypical over a party or which girl he was about to do, or something like that.

She didn't know why her last thought made her want to punch a wall.

"Edward Cullen," a nurse called. "Dr. Harper is ready for you."

Edward got up from his chair and gave out a huff. He glanced back at Bella and gave her one of his crooked grins before following the nurse down the hallway. Esme began to follow when she paused to turn around and walk back to Bella.

"I scheduled you for an appointment as well, they should call you in about ten minutes."

What in the actual fuck? "Esme, you didn't have to do that …"

"Bella, don't worry. I made sure that they scheduled Carlisle for you."

"Okay, but …"

"Sweetie," Esme interrupted again. "Remember that we're just trying to help you. This is a good thing, and it will be over before you know it. Do you need me to be there with you?"

As much as Bella wanted to say _yes_, the look in Esme's eyes made her shake her head. She was sure it wasn't intentional, but Bella couldn't help it. Esme kept looking down the hallway Edward had walked through not too long ago, and Bella knew that she wanted to be with her son. Who was she to tell the woman who had gone to the police with her to defy her child? Esme gave Bella a quick hug before jogging down the hallway, trying to catch up to Edward and the nurse. Bella was left sitting alone in the waiting room with the lady behind the front desk. She sighed and looked up at the ceiling.

Bella should have known that Esme had tagged her along so that she could get a check up. It should have been obvious, but Bella was too occupied with the remembrance of going to the cops. She should have predicted that going to the police also meant getting medical help. It would be inevitable, since Carlisle was a doctor. But still, Bella couldn't believe that she didn't see it coming. She wanted to do a face palm, but refrained because she didn't want to look ridiculous.

She constantly moved within her chair – crossing and uncrossing her legs, stretching her arms, leaning on one armrest before switching to the other side. Bella wished she had brought a book or _something. _She wasn't going to lie to herself – the thought of Carlisle helping her made her really freaking nervous. He would be making notes, and even though Detective Newton made his own report, it was completely different. Carlisle would be making notes for medical purposes. He would fix whatever Edward missed or wasn't able to mend and it gave her goose bumps. She knew she was broken and Carlisle fixing her up would only make it more real.

The bright side of this day was that after this Bella wouldn't have to worry about anything else. She could walk around without having to worry about Phil grabbing her and beating her. She could say something without him calling her a nasty name. The thought excited her, but then was clouded with the anxiety of her appointment. Bella rolled her eyes – she was going to have to come to terms with it all. Detective Newton would probably call whenever he had or needed something, and Carlisle would most likely make sure that Bella had more checkups to make ensure that she was healing completely. Bella inwardly joked that maybe they scheduled a therapist for her as well.

Then she stopped laughing in her head because she hoped that she didn't just jinx it.

"Isabella Swan," a nurse with light blonde hair and brown eyes announced. "Dr. Cullen is ready for you."

_You can do this,_ She assured to herself as she pushed herself out of the chair. Bella followed the nurse down the hall opposite the one Edward and Esme had taken. They passed by several rooms, and Bella realized that it was busier down here than where she had been. Granted, she was only in the waiting room, but it was weird that she was the only one there. As they passed room by room, Bella saw people – all varied in ages – whom were either sleeping, lying in bed watching TV, or were getting checked up by their doctor. Bella wondered if any of them were severely ill, and she prayed to God if any of them were, that they made full recovery.

Of course, Bella was guided to the last room in the hallway. She wanted to roll her eyes, but refrained.

"Dr. Cullen will be here in a few minutes. You can sit on the bed while you wait for him," The nurse smiled as she wrote something down on a piece of paper, placing it inside a folder that sat on the desk right beside the window. "I'm Taylor. Don't be scared to holler for me if you need anything, okay?"

"Sure," Bella said, watching as Nurse Taylor walked out of the room.

Slapping her thighs, she walked over to the desk where the nurse had placed the piece of paper. Bella didn't mean to be nosey, but sometimes she was too curious for her own good. She looked at the door quickly to make sure that no one would walk in at the wrong time, and since no one was even near the door, Bella peered at the file.

_Swan, Isabella._

Bella quietly swore.

Of course they would make a file for her. A place where all of her injuries could be written down and visited whenever it was needed. She knew that it was policy and what not, but Bella didn't like it. What if some random fucker went through files and chose hers to peek through? It was highly unlikely, but she still didn't appreciate the thought.

Bella knew they would keep it safe, but fuck. She groaned and hung her head, rubbing the back of her neck as she sat on the bed. She wanted to get it over with, but didn't want to be here at the same time. Bella should have been out celebrating or some shit, not in the damn hospital. She knew it was the right thing to do but she really, _really _didn't want to be here.

The paper crinkled underneath her as she shifted on the stiff bed. She crossed her ankles and huffed, questioning how long Carlisle was going to take. Bella wondered whose idea it was, to make an appointment for her. Was it Esme or Carlisle's? It would make sense if it were Carlisle's doing, since he was a doctor and all, but it could have been Esme too. She had that whole 'it's the right thing to do,' crap going on. Bella decided that they must have thought of it together. She rolled her eyes and uncrossed her ankles.

Bella shouldn't have been complaining, she knew that. The Cullen's had been so gracious. However, she couldn't help how she felt, and in no way would be telling them what she truly thought of the hospital. The police was one thing, but medical help? God. She could have been searching her ass off for Charles Garland right now, but she wasn't able to. Everything was happening all at once and Bella had a feeling that she was really stressed because of her lack of sleep. Her exhaustion was getting to her.

Maybe she should have been sleeping instead of fucking twirling in the guestroom.

Bella grinned at the thought, remembering how carefree it felt. Then she felt guilty, because everything she had thought within the past few minutes were selfish and inconsiderate. She was doing all this shit for Carlisle and Esme, and shouldn't have been complaining like the teenager she was because they would be taking care of her for God knows how long. They were good people, and Bella sometimes forgot that she didn't have to always guard herself around them. They were there to help her, and she needed to stop being a brat.

"Bella!" Carlisle's voice brought her out of her reverie. He grinned at her and closed the door behind him. "I suspect that your meeting with the police went well."

She nodded. "Detective Newton was really good about the whole thing, and Esme was there for me. So yeah, I guess it did go pretty well."

"Fantastic," He said. He walked over to the desk and grabbed Bella's file. _Bella's file. _It made her inwardly cringe. On the outside she was watching Carlisle. He had his doctor's uniform on, and it was then that Bella made notice that for an old guy, he was very good looking with his straight nose, square jaw, bright blue eyes, and blonde hair. Edward had his face, but the eyes and the hair were different …

Wait, did Bella just imply that Edward was good looking too? No, no wait. Fuck. Her exhaustion must have been getting the best of her. But then again, Bella remembered how Edward's green eyes seemed to capture her, and the way his lopsided grin didn't disgust her. God, Bella didn't know what to think anymore. She wasn't even sure if she _wanted _to think at this point.

"Now, if you don't mind, could you just show me all the injuries that need attention?"

"Oh, um, sure," Bella mumbled. She did the same thing she had done at the police station – taking off her cardigan and slipping off the top half of her jumper, exposing her side.

"When did this happen?" Carlisle asked as he touched certain spots of her side, examining the damage. He didn't sound surprised. Instead his voice had that common doctor's tone – the tone that was lined with concern, tranquil, and deep thought.

"Last night," Bella admitted. "I was going to tell you guys but then Renee came and I guess it sort of just slipped my mind."

"That's okay, Bella. The important thing is that I'm seeing it _now_, at the _hospital_ no less," Carlisle gaited over to a cabinet and grabbed a small box. "Is it okay if you tell me what happened?"

Bella sighed and repeated the story she had told Detective Newton. The whole time she told Carlisle about being abducted at school and then getting wine glasses thrown at her, he had been silent. He was rubbing something on her side that felt very cold, and then covered it was a large bandage. His only response was, "Then I'm glad you're staying with us."

When he was finished, Bella pulled the rest of her jumper back on. She kept her cardigan off as Carlisle took out the rest of her stitches, since they were healing nicely. Of course he had to mend the few that were ripped out, but he only put bandages on those. He put light pressure around the areas of her eye, and mentioned how he was happy that the bruise was almost gone.

"Are you on any medication?" Carlisle asked as he scribbled on a piece of paper.

"Pain medication," Bella told him. "But I haven't taken them in a while – I haven't really needed it."

"Well from what I can see you won't need them anymore. Just put this ointment," He handed her the bottle and she spun it in her hand. "On every night before you go to bed."

"Okay."

"Look, Bella. I know that going to the police and getting checked out must be uncomfortable, but understand that we only made you do this because we care for you. Things will get better, I promise. And if you ever need to talk to someone, know that we're here. All of us."

Bella got the hint that Carlisle also meant that Edward was there for her. And while she knew that he probably would, Bella didn't know if she was ready to _fully _confide with him. With any of them. She respected them all – well, respected Edward a shit load more than before – but she wasn't ready for that. Maybe in time.

Of course Bella didn't tell him that. "Thank you, Carlisle. Your family is wonderful, I don't know how I can ever repay you for what you all have done for me."

Carlisle waved her off. "Your safety is payment enough. And anyways, you're done. Painless, right?"

"I guess." Bella shrugged and giggled, just happy that it was over with.

Carlisle walked her to the door, and when he opened it, Bella was shocked that Edward was leaning against the wall.

"Edward! How did it go?" Carlisle asked. He was close to him now, almost like he wanted to give Edward a hug.

"Good, like always," Edward replied. "Doctor Harper just told me to keep doing what I'm doing."

Carlisle patted Edward's back. "That's very good." Bella could have sworn she saw Carlisle's shoulders relax, but she didn't dwell on it. "Well, I have to head towards my next patient. I'll see you two later."

Edward waved goodbye while Bella nodded in acknowledgement. Soon enough, Carlisle turned around the corner and it was only the two of them, standing opposite each other. He was still coolly leaning against the wall. He was watching her, Bella could tell. She wasn't looking at him, she just knew. Bella could only imagine what went through Edward's head as his recently discovered pretty eyes observed her. Usually, such staring would make her uncomfortable, but his didn't. It was a strange thing, but Bella didn't seem to mind. She just looked down at her shoes.

"So I guess you've been cleared," Edward said, breaking the silence.

"You could put it that way. Your dad fixed me up pretty well," She lightly patted her side. "So I guess you're good too."

She was surprised when Edward chuckled, but more so that it had an edge of bitterness. "I guess so."

Bella nodded, trying not to feel awkward. Then she felt it again, felt him _watching _her. Edward seemed to be doing that a lot lately, and Bella wondered why. Did her story fascinate him to the point that he had to watch her every move? Was he making sure she wasn't fragile? Was it something completely different? Bella didn't know. She didn't know if she wanted to know. Yes, she was very confused.

"How come you don't want to be here?"

His question caught her off guard. "Huh?"

"The police, the hospital – I can tell you'd rather be anywhere else."

"Because I want my privacy …"

"You're lying," Edward interrupted. "And you're a really bad at it, by the way."

Bella crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm not lying, Edward."

Edward rolled his eyes. "Yes you are. I mean, there must be another reason why you don't want to be here."

"I've already told you why …"

"And I called you out on your bullshit."

Bella bit the inside of her cheek. "You're such an asshole, you know that?"

"Really? Are we back to this shit? C'mon, Isabella, I was just asking you a reasonable question."

"And I gave you a _reasonable _answer," Bella retorted. "I might have my reasons, but why should I tell you?"

"Because unlike my parents, I'm not easily fooled. And I … I …"

"You _what_, Edward? Just say it already," Bella impatiently said.

Edward sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I care for you, okay?"

"Oh," Bella stupidly replied. She didn't know what else to day – she hadn't seen it coming.

Luckily Esme showed up and told them it was time to go home. Bella quickly followed behind her, making sure she didn't make eye contact with Edward. She didn't know what bothered her more – what Edward had said or the fact that Bella wasn't shocked about his statement. Edward kept quiet as he trailed behind her, and Bella wondered what he was thinking. She always wondered what he was thinking, and she was trying to remember when that suddenly happened.

All three of them were still silent as they got inside Esme's car. Bella noticed how substantially relaxed Esme was now, compared to how she was earlier. However, she didn't really think much about it because she was still over analyzing what Edward had said. She didn't know why she was still thinking about it, but she was. She sighed and pulled her hair over to one side. Bella was restless, her heart beating fast and hard and she wasn't sure why. She bit her bottom lip and looked straight, afraid she might catch Edward's reflection in the side mirror. The rain had continued, falling harder. The sound of the rain hitting the car was what was distracting Bella from her own thoughts, and still, she was thinking too much. She always hated that about herself.

"What's that?" Esme suddenly asked.

"What's what?" Bella wondered.

"That buzzing. Where is coming from?"

Bella didn't hear it at first, but as she listened closer, she finally identified it. It was coming from underneath her. She was about to look under her seat when the buzzing was suddenly in her ear. She gasped and looked behind her. Edward's hand was holding her cell phone.

"It was under your seat," Edward said monotonously.

Bella gulped, taking it from him before whispering, "Thanks."

With her cell phone in her hand, Bella rolled her eyes. That's where the damn thing was. It must have fallen out of her pocket that morning when Esme dropped her off at school. If only she hadn't left it, then she would have had it on her when Phil and Renee had unexpectedly taken her home. Bella sighed and unlocked her Blackberry. She was shocked to see that she had so many text messages.

They were all from Alice.

Bella didn't want to go through all of them, so she read the latest one.

_Bitch, where are you? This is like my millionth text. Anyways, call/text me._

Bella felt bad that she had been neglecting Alice, but she had her reasons. She typed her reply and hit 'send.'

**_Sorry, I've just been really busy._**

Her reply came quickly

_Oh, so she's alive! _

**_Funny. Anyways, I'm on my way home. Do you want to hang out or something?_**

_Hell fucking yes! When do you want me to pick you up?_

**_How about I pick you up? My car needs some TLC._**

_Sounds good, when can I expect your MIA ass?_

**_Fifteen minutes. I'll honk when I'm outside your house._**

_Okay. See you soon. Xoxoxo._

Bella locked her phone and slid it into her cardigan pocket. She made the mistake of looking out the window, glancing at the side mirror to see that Edward was staring at her. She instantly changed her gaze. He looked nervous, and Bella couldn't help feeling that she was the reason. They seemed to be bouncing emotions off each other. If she did something he would react in an unexpected way, and vice versa.

When Esme pulled into the driveway and shut off the engine, Bella ignored all thoughts of Edward and asked, "Esme, do you need help with anything?"

"Of course not, Bella. Why?"

"Well I was just wondering if you don't need any help, if it's okay that I go hang out with my friend, Alice, for a bit."

Esme smiled. "Go. Have fun! If you're going to be out late, make sure that you're home by midnight. That's Edward's curfew, and since you're staying with us that will be yours too."

"That's good to know, but I don't think I'll be out for that long," Bella said. "I'll just go inside quickly to get a proper jacket and my keys."

Bella stepped out of the car and ran towards the front door. Luckily, Esme wasn't too far behind her and unlocked the door. Bella wiped her shoes before stepping inside and heading for the guestroom. When she stepped inside, Bella was a little disappointed that the colors of sunrise didn't stay within these walls, but shrugged it off. She scavenged through her closet until she found what she was looking for and slipped it on. Bella took one last glance at the mirror and applied lip-gloss before heading out the door. She almost ran into Edward when she turned down the hallway, and inside she chuckled darkly. They always seemed to find each other in the hallway.

Edward cleared his throat. "You heading out?"

"Yeah. Alice and I are just going to chill or something," Bella said. "How about you? Are you just going to stay here for the rest of the day?"

"Nah. I've got work in about an hour."

"I see."

_This is so fucking awkward._

"Can I see your phone?" Edward asked. Bella eyed him before pulling her phone out of her pocket and handing it to him. He typed quickly on the keyboard before giving it back to her. She was going to ask him what he did when he said, "In case you need me, you'll have my number. Don't hesitate to call me, okay? I'll always answer."

"Oh, okay. Thanks."

Edward only grinned at her before walking past her and towards his own bedroom. Bella was still standing in the middle of the hallway when Edward shut his door, holding her cell phone against her chest. Eventually she moved, but even as she told Esme goodbye and fought the rain to get inside her car, all she could think was what Edward did was awfully kind. It made her blush, even. Bella touched her cheeks and shook her head. She couldn't believe that something Edward did made her blush.

Blushing aside, Bella started her car and drove away from the Cullen's house, wondering what Edward was thinking again.

**x x x x x x**

Bella honked twice when she parked outside Alice's home. As she waited, her eyes toured the inside of her car. It had been so long since she had driven her Audi convertible. She missed how smooth it was to drive it and how powerful it was. With everything that had been going on, Bella didn't have the chance to drive it. It was unfortunate, really, but Bella swore she would drive her baby more often.

Alice was running towards the car, getting inside not long after Bella unlocked the door.

"Holy shit, the rain is ridiculous," Alice scolded as she took off her hood and began fixing her hair.

"You get used to it," Bella shrugged. "So where to?"

"Just drive. If we see something, we can stop."

"Okay, boss."

Bella drove onto the road and drove to nowhere. She didn't mind of course, because her car seriously needed a drive, but she wondered where they were going to stop. Alice had turned on the radio and Adele's _Rolling in the Deep _came on. She didn't blast the music like she had that time they went to the diner, and Bella was okay with that. Once in a while Bella would take a random turn just for the hell of it. She didn't care that they didn't have a plan, Bella was content with not having _any _plans for once.

During the drive, Bella noticed many things. The rain had eased, but not by much. The roads were busier than normal. She was still good on gas. Angela Webber still dressed like a slut in this weather and didn't mind that her ass was practically showing as she ran across the street; Alice and Bella had a good laugh about that. Also, Alice was wearing the leather jacket that she had lent Bella that night at the diner. It was a nice jacket, she was going to have to ask Alice to help her find something like it.

Another thing Bella noticed was that Alice was unusually quiet. It wasn't like her to keep her mouth shut, and Bella wondered what was wrong. She was about to ask her about it when Alice sighed.

"My dad died when we were in California. He served in the army when Emmett and I were little, but he killed himself when I was fifteen because he couldn't handle the memories. At least, that's what he said in the letter."

Bella kept her eyes forward, she wanted to tell Alice she was sorry, but had a feeling she wasn't finished yet.

"I used to be popular, you know," Alice said. "But my dad's death was just too much. So Gianna, my best friend at the time, and her boyfriend, Jasper, decided that we get drunk to get my mind off it. However, Gianna had to leave early so I stayed at Jasper's for a little bit. The alcohol was working, I mean, my dad didn't even cross my mind. All I could think about was Jasper," Alice laughed. "I know, it's typical. I was so in love with him, but I didn't say anything because of Gianna. But you know what they say about alcohol: the truth will come out.

"Jasper and I were so, _so _drunk. One thing led to another, and the next thing I know, I'm waking up in his bed naked."

Bella stopped at a red light, looking at Alice to continue.

"When he woke up, he told me that he was going to break up with Gianna a week ago, but chickened out. He'd had feelings for me for a while, and I told him I felt the same way but that we couldn't continue. Gianna was my best friend, and she would always come first. Hoes before bros, right? So anyway, I went to Gianna's the minute I walked out of Jasper's door. I knew she was going to be mad, and she was. She had every right to be. But I thought she would eventually forgive me. She never did.

"A year later, and she _still _hated me. She told everyone at school what a slut I was, and I lost all of my popularity. All of the people I thought who had my back, suddenly didn't want anything to do with me. I stopped telling her how sorry I was and that I never meant for it to happen – she wouldn't listen to me.

"One day, we got into this heated fight. I don't remember what triggered it, all I know is that I said something along the lines of 'at least I didn't fail to satisfy your boyfriend. Sorry, I meant _ex _boyfriend. He broke up with you the day after he and I had sex right?' I mean, I know what I said was wrong and I shouldn't have brought it up in such a manner, but what she said to me was so, _so _much worse."

"What did she say, Alice?" Bella asked, now parked beside the library.

Alice sighed, her breath shaky. "She said, 'At least my dad is still alive,'" Bella gasped and suddenly she wanted to find this Gianna and rip her a new one. "Yeah, well, Emmett heard and took me home. He asked mom if we could move because he didn't think it would be healthy for me if we stayed in California. My mom agreed and here we are. In Forks."

"What about Jasper?" Bella wondered.

"I didn't say good-bye to Jasper, and it broke my heart," Alice wiped away a tear. "One day, I'll see him again. Not anytime soon, but in the future."

"Alice, I am so, _so _sorry about what happened to you. Especially your dad – I bet he was a great man."

"He really was," Alice smiled, obviously trying to fight her tears. "I'm sorry I'm only telling you this shit now, but I was scared."

Bella touched Alice's arm. "You didn't have to be scared, and I'm glad you told me, Al. But why did you?"

"Because you have a story to tell, too."

Bella's hand froze on Alice's arm. She watched cautiously as Alice pulled something out of the pocket of her leather jacket. It was folded napkin. When Alice gave it to her Bella opened it, and once she did she knew there was no turning back now.

"Now it's your turn," Alice whispered.

* * *

**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

**Tumblr: karinav**

**These sites are literally the reason, besides fanfiction, that I'm up until three in the morning every night. Oh, the summer life. Follow me :)**

* * *

**Hi, all! First week of August and all I can think is: Damn, July went by fast. I start school in a month ... it's scary. Grade 12, senior year, whatever the fuck you want to call it, I'll be graduating next summer. Jesus! I don't really know when school starts, some time in September. I'll know when I get my schedule in the mail. How many of you are starting school in August? If you are, good luck! I hope you have a fantastic school year :)**

**Now, before you plot ways to torture me because of this cliff hanger, just know that I'll get back to it. It needed to end here, or else the chapter would have been like a million pages. Okay, not really. But it would have been super long and I don't want to drag it on. Besides, next chapter is Edward's POV. Are you excited? I am! I was writing it today and I'm just so excited to get it out. Writing for Edward is fun.**

**I need some fics to read, do any of you guys have suggestions? If you do, let me know via review and/or message. You can even message me on tumblr or tweet me on twitter. Twilight fics please. I love Harry Potter and the Hunger Games and all that, but my fanfiction experience is all Twilight. Something about our fandom, I guess haha. Nothing too angsty. Slight fluff, but not to the point where I can't breathe. Some drama. Actually you know what, just surprise me! Haha. I'm indecisive.**

**OKAY THAT'S IT. I SWEAR TO GOD! I have no clue why my A/N's are like 32587601238476120 x 8 pages long. I guess I just have a lot to say lol. Anyways, let me know your thoughts!**

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW, and see you next week :)**

**Much Love,**

**Karina **


	16. Chapter Sixteen: Foreign

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a pair of the Steve Madden boots I have been saving for since like the beginning of time ... okay, not really. But I was saving for it for what felt like forever and I finally had enough to get them :)

* * *

_You're just like your father_

_Buried deep under the water_

_You're resting on your laurels_

_And stepping on my toes_

_Whose side are you on?_

_What side is this anyway?_

_Put down your sword and crown_

_Come lay with me on the ground_

**_Moth's Wings - Passion Pit_**

* * *

Chapter Sixteen: Foreign

_**Edward**_

"Two cheeseburgers and a Caesar salad for table twelve," Edward told Jack as he ripped off the paper from his note pad and placed it on the counter. "Extra fries."

"You got it," Jack replied before he directed one of his staff to get started on the salad. He set a plate of spaghetti on the counter along with an order of fish and chips. "Here's the food for table nine."

Edward grabbed both plates. "Thanks, Jack."

On his journey to table nine, Edward remembered that this party consisted of two girls he had seen too many times in his life: Angela Webber and Lauren Mallory. As kind as they were to him, Edward couldn't stand how… how _fake_ they were.

Angela clearly needed to watch the weather network more often, because she dressed for summer everyday, no matter how wet or cold it was. He also knew that she had a crush on him, since she always seemed to hike up her skirt or bend down to pick something up or pull her shirt lower whenever he was around. Edward was guy, of course he looked, but that didn't mean he appreciated what she was doing. In a way, Edward felt sorry for her, because she tried too hard to fit in and did a horrible way of doing it. Angela was a bitch and a bit of a whore, and Edward was just not into that kind of shit.

Lauren, on the other hand, had an innocent front. With her short blond hair and square framed glasses, she seemed like she didn't have a mean bone in her body. However, that was not the case. Lauren didn't seem to have a filter, and would constantly talk gossip or shit to other people. Edward knew this because she would sometimes tell him the latest news during second period phys-ed. She thought he would want to know who said what and who fucked whom; but in truth, all Edward wanted to do was shoot the ball into the hoop or hit someone with a dodge ball instead of hearing what she had to say. And for some odd reason, Rosalie liked her. Edward didn't want to get into the politics that was girlfriends, but all he knew was that Lauren annoyed the fuck out of him.

However, because he was a seventeen-year-old boy who drove and needed gas, he had to play nice tonight. Of course he could always ask his parents for money, but Edward needed to get his own. After high school Edward planned on leaving, which meant he would have to fend for himself. So, needless to say, tips saved his fucking life. And in order to get good tips he needed to: a) thank Tanya for giving him people that will tip well, and b) turn on the mother fucking charm.

"Ladies," Edward said in his 'sultry' voice. He placed the food in front of them, aware that they were watching him. "Your food, nice and hot. Is there anything else I can get for you?" Both Angela and Lauren shook their heads, though Angela had a look in her eye that said otherwise. Edward ignored it and tried not to vomit with a smile. "Then I'll be around if you need me."

Then he winked and walked away.

"He _so_ wants me, Lauren," He heard Angela gush. It took all Edward could from laughing and doubling over, because what he _really _wanted from Angela was to cover her legs with a jacket or something, because he swore he could have seen a hint of bright green between her legs. Fucking _bleh._

What Edward really liked in girls was the mystery. The kind that showed skin, but not too much; it was exciting thinking about what _could _be under the piece of fabric. Like what Isabella was wearing today … damn. That neckline was too low, yet too high. And the way her eyes widened when she saw him this morning, her cheeks flush red as she looked away. Edward couldn't believe that he had missed it all these years; he couldn't believe how beautiful she was. And yet, he knew exactly why he hadn't noticed her.

Edward wanted to throw himself off a cliff for what he had done to Isabella. Before, he felt guilty. But now that he knew that the reason he had treated Isabella like shit was because of a lie that Rose had conjured, well, Edward really, _really _wanted to throw himself in front of a bus. He was feeling _more_ than guilt, and it was sitting at the pit of his stomach, never letting him forget how much of an asshole he was. Never letting him forget how much of a _fool_ he was. Out of everyone he knew, Edward thought that Rose was the person he could trust – the person he could always count on. They had grown up together, shared things and told each other stuff that no one else could know. They knew each other's weaknesses and strengths. They were best friends. However, Edward didn't know if their status was the same, or would ever be same again. Edward felt betrayed that Rose had done such a thing, and all he wanted to know was _why. _His trust in her was too great, and Rose knew that. She led Edward to believe that Isabella was toxic and needed to be put in her place. What he heard from Rose was wrong. What he believed was wrong. The way he treated Isabella was wrong. Because of Edward, everyone at school ridiculed her, and it was so fucking _wrong._

However, the worst part of it all was that Isabella forgave him. She fucking _forgave _him, even after all the shit he had done to her. It was kind of Isabella to do so and he didn't understand why she would do such a thing, but Edward couldn't accept it. Even though it made him feel better knowing the person who had every right to hate him didn't, that she was able to see something in him that led her to give him pardon, he didn't deserve her clemency. Edward couldn't even forgive himself. What he did to her was so bad, and the reason he had done it turned out to be false. If the roles were reversed, Edward wouldn't have offered such kindness. He would have had a fucking fit and smashed something. But roles weren't reversed and Edward did what he did. Isabella, who had been abused and neglected, was too kind for her own good. She was beautiful and understanding, and he didn't deserve her exculpation.

"You okay, Edward?" Tanya asked as he approached the table she was cleaning.

"I'm fine," Edward replied, helping her gather the dirty dishes. "I just have a lot on my mind."

She nodded. "I can tell. You came to work today and your shift isn't even until tomorrow."

"I just needed to get out for a bit. Things have been crazy."

"Speaking of crazy, did you find the girl you were looking for yesterday?"

"I did, and thank fucking god for that," Edward grimaced. "By the way, thanks a lot for giving me those bitches at table nine."

Tanya looked back and chuckled. "What, I thought they would pay well."

"Oh, they will. But I see them enough at school to know that one of them eye fucks me and the other just fucks everyone over."

"Well as long as you turned on the charm then your tips should be through the roof."

"T, who do you think you're talking to?" Edward teased.

"You're so full of it, Edward," Tanya rolled her eyes and laughed, before giving him a serious but kind expression. "But you're a good person. Don't forget that."

"I'll try," Edward said, though his heart wasn't in it. "I'll catch you later 'kay, T?"

They gave each other slight waves before Edward turned on his heel. As much as Tanya believed that Edward had a good heart, he couldn't wrap his head around it. He used to think that he did – have a good heart, that is – and only hid it around other people. His reputation meant so much to him, and he had to uphold it. However, that was before Isabella happened. Now, Edward didn't know what his reputation meant to him. Keeping up the badass act was exhausting, and he didn't know if he wanted to maintain it. Edward wanted to show off his good grades and just stop being an asshole in general. He knew he had good intentions, he just didn't know how to present them. It was different territory for him and it was scary as hell.

Edward made an appearance to his other tables, asking if they needed accommodation before asking an employee, Victoria, to cover him while he went to the restroom. Victoria was kind of a bitch about it, but did it anyway. He felt bad that he gave her more work to do, especially since it was so swamped at the moment, but Edward needed to refresh. His mind was in jumbles and he couldn't work in such a state. He took an extra shift to relieve his stress, and all he was doing was making it worse.

He pushed through the bathroom door and walked over to the sink closest to the far wall. Gripping his hands around it he hunched over and groaned. Edward took a few deep, long breaths before glancing up at the mirror. He was surprised that he had done so well in tips during this shift, seeing as he looked like shit. Edward didn't get much sleep during the night because his thoughts were only thinking of Isabella and how stupid he was to not notice what was going on next door. He also looked pale, and Edward pressed the heel of his palm to his forehead. He hadn't eaten since breakfast because of his appointment. It was ironic really, since it would make sense for him to be more aware of his limits after a checkup, but it was the exact opposite. Edward wanted to forget his limitations, and his appointments only motivated him. Well, motivated him until something happened.

At the moment Edward was feeling slightly nauseas, which was not good at all.

"Fuck," he mumbled.

He turned the faucet and splashed the cold water onto his face. Like he didn't have enough shit going on, now he felt like everything was spinning. Edward took a paper towel and patted himself dry, wondering why he thought so much. It would have been so much easier if he just stopped thinking. If thinking just didn't _exist _in his life, it would be better. At least, he thought it would be.

Edward shook his head at himself and pushed himself off the sink. He knew it was impossible for him to stop thinking, but he was going to try. His first order of business once he left the men's restroom was a trip to the kitchen. Jack never minded when Edward took food, and though Jack wouldn't admit to it, Edward believed it was because he was a favorite. Not that he was full of shit, but Edward just had a feeling.

After eating a bowl of macaroni and cheese, Edward made his way out to his tables. Needless to say, Victoria was not pleased that she had to wait so many people while he was away. Edward agreed to give her twenty dollars and before he knew it, she was back to being just a regular bitch. She tossed her fire red hair over her shoulder and flipped him off one last time before returning to her assigned tables. Tanya had witnessed the exchange and only gave him a teasing shake of her head.

Edward was disappointed that Angela and Lauren hadn't left yet. Their table was clean and yet, there they sat. It was evident that they were waiting for him, and as much as Edward wanted to tell Victoria he had to go to the restroom again, he decided it was better to get it over with instead of putting it off. Edward reminded himself that he was doing this all for the money, and soon enough he put on a big grin and walked towards table nine.

"Is there anything else I can help you two with?" He asked.

Angela giggled. "Oh, there's a lot you can help me with," _Puke. _"We actually wanted to give your tip in person. Victoria didn't look like she was trustworthy."

"Oh, thanks," Edward said as she handed him a very generous tip. "I'll see you guys at school. Have a good night."

He was about to walk away to freedom when Lauren said, "Are you going tonight?"

"Going where?"

"The party at Emmett's, of course," She replied.

Edward had completely forgotten about Emmett's party. He mentioned earlier in the week that his mom was out of town for the weekend and wanted to throw a party to introduce himself to the town. Edward thought it was ridiculous, since everyone already knew him because of his relationship with Rose and his social status, thanks to his hanging out with our group. Not to mention everyone knew him _before _he stepped foot in Forks High – small town, big gossip. Anyways, Edward told Emmett that he would go, though that was before Isabella's confession. Now he didn't know if he felt up to it. Edward usually went to every party in Forks, sometimes even the ones out of town. It was just what people expected of him. Lots of people knew him and invited him, and usually didn't have anything better to do. Fuck if Edward would do anything to get drunk, but he just didn't feel right about it this time.

However, people _still _expected him to go, so his reply to the two of them was, "If I get off work early enough and am not too exhausted, I'll see you there."

Edward had a feeling that going would be a bad idea, but he didn't give a shit at that point. He needed to be anywhere but at his house. He needed to keep Isabella out of his mind because the guilt, her forgiveness, and her beauty were just too much to handle. There was also something else that was eating at him, something that made his heart beat faster and palms to get sweaty, but Edward couldn't place it. He didn't want to place it. What he wanted was an escape.

His first step to an escape was walking away from Angela and Lauren's table, because they annoyed the hell out of him and Edward couldn't stand to look at Angela practically stripping for him. Edward could only imagine what Lauren would say at the party. Probably some shit about how he was fucking Angela, which would never come true. He regretted his first time – he didn't even really remember it. So why would he go have sex with a girl who didn't know when to back the fuck off? The next time he had sex it would be someone special, and he wouldn't feel like it was a mistake.

"So, I heard you're going to Emmett's tonight," Victoria said as she wiped a table.

Edward grabbed the solution bottle and sprayed down the table beside hers. "I'm thinking about it. Are you going?"

She nodded. "He's cool, so his party should be the shit."

"I didn't even know you were friends with Emmett. He's never mentioned you before."

"He sits next to me in fifth period English," Victoria shrugged. "So are you going to go or not?"

Edward sighed and scratched the back of his head. "I guess so. But my shift won't be over for a bit."

"Do you want to carpool? My shift isn't over until late, too."

"I drove here, so it's okay," Edward then got what Victoria was trying to say and laughed. "You want to make James jealous, don't you?"

"The bastard doesn't know what's he's missing," Victoria said bitterly. "Can you help me or not?"

"You promise that James won't beat the fuck out of me?"

"I promise."

"Then fine, I'll carpool with you. I owe you for covering my tables, anyways. But once we step inside Emmett's place we go our separate ways, okay?"

"That's all I'll need," Victoria assured. "I'll just follow behind you so you can drop off your car, and then we'll head to Emmett's."

Edward nodded and moved onto the next table. "Oh, before I forget," He pulled twenty dollars from his back pocket and handed it to her. "Thanks, Vick."

Victoria collected the cash and chuckled. "No problem, Cullen."

As Edward walked away to grab the food for table eleven, all he could stress was that agreeing to go to that party was a mistake. He needed to tell Victoria that he couldn't go, or make up some sort of excuse. Some shit like he was sick or that his mother found out he broke something and was grounded. That could have worked – Victoria wasn't that smart. Or maybe she was. She was deceiving that way. Plus, he needed to see if Isabella made it home in one piece, he wanted to know if he could be at any service. Edward wanted to see her precious face walk through the door and _know _that she was okay. Suddenly, he couldn't get his mind off of Isabella, and he wasn't sure if he wanted to. A girl had never clouded his thoughts as much as she had – he didn't know how to deal with it, didn't know what to make of it …

Maybe the party was a good thing after all. Edward needed to get drunk or something. Some socializing with his group could be a good thing; talking about sports and hot girls, complain about the physics exam and how difficult it was, even though he almost got everything correct. Yeah, maybe what Edward needed was a trip back to the life he was used to – the life that didn't have Isabella haunting his every action.

**x x x x x x**

"Hurry your ass up, Cullen!" Victoria yelled as Edward parked his car in the driveway. She was sitting in her car and being the most impatient bitch he ever met. "James is probably making out with a junior as we speak."

"I'm a junior," he reminded her.

"Yeah, but you're not a slut and you don't annoy me," She said, trying to make him feel better. "Now hurry the fuck up."

Edward sighed. "Give me ten minutes to change."

It was around nine o'clock when their shifts ended, and all Edward could think was that he had just had the longest work hours he had ever done and was ready to pass out. However, he already talked himself into going to Emmett's, and he didn't want to talk himself _out_. It was tiring and Edward didn't really give a fuck anymore.

He ran onto his porch steps and stuck the key into the lock, turning it until he heard a _click. _His mother was in the kitchen in her pajamas when he walked in. Edward greeted her with a kiss on the cheek before telling her his evening plans. Usually Esme wouldn't have a problem with him going to parties, she would just tell him to be safe and that would be it. But ever since the appointment, she was on edge. She was always like that on one day of the month, and Edward hated that. After convincing her that he would watch his alcohol and take care of himself, Esme finally told him it was okay. Edward wished that his mom would be as sure about himself as he was, but she couldn't help it. No one could help it – it was just the way it was.

And Edward fucking hated it.

Shaking his head he quickly ran to his room and changed from his uniform into black jeans and a blue, long sleeve v-neck shirt. Edward ran his hand through his hair in the mirror and spritzed some cologne. There were still bags under his eyes, but there was really nothing he could do about that. He shrugged and decided he looked decent enough and headed out the door. Victoria was already honking like a maniac, and he didn't want anyone complaining. And by that, he didn't want his parents to tell him that his ride needed to calm the fuck down. Even though she did.

The sky was clear when Edward jogged to Victoria's car. He could see the stars, and it was mesmerizing. In fact, he was so intrigued by it that he almost ran into the vehicle. Luckily, he was coordinated enough to stop himself and slide into the seat instead.

"What took you so damn long?" Victoria scolded. She must have changed when Edward was inside his house; she was now in a pink, figure-fit dress that landed mid-thigh. It was apparent that she was using everything she had to get James back.

"My mom was giving me a lecture," Edward rolled his eyes. "Now drive, Vick. I need to get drunk."

Victoria laughed and started the engine. "Doesn't everybody."

On the way to Emmett's, Edward couldn't help but notice that Isabella wasn't home. He wondered where she could have been, if she was okay. He quickly pushed away the thought of her being in trouble aside. Edward had given Isabella his number, and she would call him if there were a problem. He patted his pocket to make sure he had his cell phone and sighed when he felt it vibrate. Edward pulled out the iPhone he had gotten a week ago and unlocked the screen.

A new text message from Emmett.

_Dude! Where the hell are you? All these chicks keep coming up to me and asking about you._

Edward rolled his eyes and texted him back. He had no interest in those girls who were looking for him. All he wanted was to get his hands on alcohol and hang out with his friends. If girls began to grind against him or kiss his neck, so be it. However Edward wasn't going to lie to himself – if some girl did that, he would have another girl on his mind. Hopefully he was drunk off his ass by that time so his mind wouldn't be able to conjure coherent thoughts.

The area that Emmett lived in was crowded with cars, and Edward guessed that it was because the drivers were at his house. And after finding a place to park, Victoria and Edward both got out of the car. They walked in silence. Edward had his hands in his pockets as Victoria had her arms crossed over chest, her heels the only one making sound between the two of them. As they got closer to Emmett's house, Edward could hear loud chatter and obnoxious music. The house was so bright – every light must have been on. Suddenly, Edward felt himself grin. This kind of scene was something he was used to. He could feel the act that he had created come to life, and soon enough, Edward was feeling pumped. He was ready to let go and just be reckless.

"You remember the plan?" Victoria asked as they walked up the porch steps. Edward nodded. "Put your arms around my shoulders."

"Yes, master," Edward teased. He did as Victoria said and pushed through the door. The scene inside was something Edward hadn't seen in a while. People were dancing, or grinding, and alcohol was being passed around like candy. The air was thick with the smell of weed. He saw many familiar faces, and they were either yelling or laughing. It was a good time, that's what this scene was. God. Edward fucking missed this.

"There's James," Victoria yelled over the music. "Thanks, Cullen. I'll see you around."

"No problem, Vick." Edward unwrapped his arm and parted from Victoria, making his way to the kitchen. He was pushing through crowds and crowds of people on his journey, trying not to get groped or have something spilled on him. This was one thing he hated about parties – the sloppy side.

"_Hey, Edward!"_

"_Yo, Ed, I haven't seen you in forever."_

"_Edward, you look really hot."_

"_Dude, glad you can make it. Come find me later and we'll get some chicks …"_

"_Edward, Eric has some really good weed on him. Wanna go smoke?"_

"_Look, Bree, Edward is here. Do you think he'll want to touch my …"_

"Edward, you little fucker!" Emmett's booming voice greeted as he exited the mob of people and entered the kitchen.

Edward had tried to be polite to everyone who greeted him on his way, but he didn't really _know_ more than half of those people. Some he saw around school and some he knew already graduated, and some he just didn't know the fuck existed. Edward wondered how all of those people knew him, but he didn't want to be a dick and ignore them. Except for some few who were practically humping his leg. He wasn't into girls who were that straightforward.

"Em," Edward said. "Wow, you've only been here for a month and a half and look at all the people who showed up."

"Fuck yeah, man. Anyways, I have to be a good host and make sure these people are taken care of, but go ahead and have a drink or some shit. Hell, go get laid or whatever. Tons of chicks here want you."

"That's what your text said," Edward rolled his eyes. "But I think I'll just stick with the alcohol for now."

"'Kay, Edward. I have to find, Rose, too. Shit. She's going to be pissed that I lost her," Emmett groaned.

"She's probably dancing."

"Yeah, I'll go check the living room. I'll see you around."

Edward waved as Emmett pushed his way through people. Emmett had brought up a topic that Edward didn't really want to face yet. Rose. There was no doubt that they would eventually run into each other some time during the night, but that didn't mean that Edward wasn't anxious. What was he going to do when the time came? Would he confront her on her bullshit, or just ignore her all together? Was even ready to give her the time of day? She had betrayed his trust, and Edward didn't know if he could ever look at her the same. That thought made him upset since Rose was his best friend, but he never expected her to lie to him and use him. Edward needed to think things through before _that _conversation arose, but he just couldn't face her. Not yet. Hopefully she would be too busy with Emmett to give a fuck about him.

Edward took his first can of beer and began to make his way toward his group of friends. They were all sitting out on the porch. He wondered what the hell they were thinking, just standing outside like fuckers when it was freezing cold outside. But when Edward saw that Rose wasn't there he decided that being outside wouldn't be such a bad idea. They were all laughing when Edward slid open the glass door. He could see his breath as he went to join them. Laurent was the first to greet him, giving him a clap on the back and then mentioning that it felt like Edward had been gone for ages.

"I've just been busy," Edward shrugged. It was true, though. "But I'm here now, so let's get fucked up!"

"Fucking yeah, bro!" Alec hollered, taking a good swig of his drink. Edward did the same and laughed.

Edward finished his beer faster than he thought he would, and was glad that Laurent had come back with more. He took it happily. Jane and Kate were talking about how stupid Angela looked in her barely-there-clothes, and Edward went on to telling them about his encounter with her during his shift. He sometimes felt bad that Angela tried so hard to fit in, but the girl didn't make it easier for herself. The conversation then moved over to the physics exam, and like Edward had predicted, they complained how unfair it was.

"Damn, Mr. Barnes is just fucking us all over," Alec complained. "What did you get on the exam?"

By this time, his friends were either tipsy or just flat out drunk. Their words were slurred and they looked like shit. The only reason Edward understood what was happening and what was being said was because he had a pretty good buzz going on.

Edward just shook his head and Jane said, "Oh, that bad?"

"Yeah," Edward agreed, trying not to show he was lying. He was sure they wouldn't catch on since they were out of it, but he just had to make sure. "Mr. Barnes hates us all."

Laurent offered him another beer, but Edward declined. "I'll be right back."

Edward slipped inside, the warmth sticking to his skin as he went back to the kitchen. The place seemed to become more crowded since the last time he was inside. People were now dancing on tables and had a game of beer pong set up. The dancing seemed to expand from the living room to everywhere else. Edward was starting to get dizzy, and he knew that it was the alcohol's fault this time. He grabbed a plastic cup and filled it with water, bringing it to his lips. He got what he needed, and he didn't need to go overboard. Edward being wasted didn't usually end well. The last time he got drunk something happened, and he really wished it didn't.

He was leaning against the counter with his plastic cup of water in his hand. He was still buzzed, but he didn't mind. The most important thing was that he was careful and listened to what his body needed. Edward took another sip and was about to head back to the porch when he felt someone's hands press themselves against his chest.

Angela.

She changed from what she had been wearing in the diner. And if it were possible, she was showing more skin than she was hours ago. She was wearing this shirt, but she pulled it down so that it could be worn as a dress, if it could even be called that. It fell just below her ass.

"_Edward,_" She slurred. Fucking great – she was drunk off her ass. "You look so, _so _hot."

"Um, thanks," Edward replied uncomfortably.

"Do I look hot, too? I got ready for you."

Edward was looking everywhere else but at Angela. "Um, sure."

As tipsy as he was, Edward knew that Angela was trying to get in his pants. He didn't want to hurt the girl's feelings, especially because she was drunk, but fuck. He didn't need to be in this position right now. The alcohol had worked and kept Isabella off his mind, but with Angela pushing herself against him, all he could think was that he wished it was Isabella that was trying to seduce him. God, he hated that she made him feel that way. It was like one day Edward thought he hated her and the next … well, Edward didn't know. Edward didn't know what Isabella was doing to him, and he wasn't sure if he liked it or not.

"Let's go find a room, Edward," Angela whispered in his ear.

"I really have to go, Angela," he said, grasping her wrists and placing them by her side, making space between them. "My friends are waiting."

"Then let them wait."

"I … I …"

"Look, Angela. Can't you see that Edward has other things to do?" A familiar voice cut in. Edward inwardly cursed, realizing that it was Rose. "I think it's time for you to leave."

Angela scowled. "Bitch."

"Thank you," Rose laughed. "Now go."

Angela waved flirtatiously at Edward before stumbling away. Edward blew out a sigh of relief – he was scared that Angela was going to rape him. Not to mention whatever she was doing spurred thoughts of Isabella. He ran a hand over his face, remembering that Rose was standing beside him. She was laughing and her breath smelled like tequila, but she didn't seem to notice that Edward would rather be anywhere but here. It always happened – Rose saving his ass from a girl who tried to get in his pants, and they always joked about it.

Edward didn't feel like joking this time.

He began to walk away when Rose grabbed his arm. "Aren't you going to thank me?"

"Thank you," Edward said and turned around.

"Hey!" Rose pulled him back with concern lined in her expression. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

"Okay," She said, unsure. "Well, since we couldn't have movie night yesterday, why don't we have it tomorrow? Just you and me?"

"Can't, I'm busy," Edward lied.

"Then how about next weekend? We can have a bonfire, too. The weather is supposed to be really nice. Remember when we were younger and we used to see who could fit the most chubby bunnies in our mouths? You won the last time but I bet I can …"

"Look, Rosalie, I can't. I'm really booked," Edward sighed and started to walk away. His back was turned to her when he said over his shoulder, "I'll see you around."

Edward didn't look back or strain to hear what Rose had to say after that. He knew she would know something was up, because he never called her Rosalie. That was good; he wanted her to know that he was mad at her. And now, he was even more pissed. His buzz was gone and now all that was left were thoughts of Isabella and the wonder of whether or not she made it home okay. Edward glanced at his phone and clicked his tongue when he noticed it was already three in the morning. Damn. Where did the time go? In any sense, it was time to go home. People were already beginning to throw up or make out with each other.

So yeah, it was time for him to leave.

He searched the house for Emmett, finding him conversing with the DJ. Edward said his goodbyes and commended Emmett for a great party. It had been fun for awhile, or until Angela showed up and the confrontation with Rose occurred. But he didn't tell Emmett that. Instead he just clapped him on the shoulder and then made his way out.

Edward was almost to the front door when he heard something he really wished he hadn't.

"You know that Isabella girl? God, if she wasn't such a freak I would tap that ass …"

The voice came from Ben Cheney, a senior on the football team. Edward didn't really talk to the guy, but knew him from different parties. He thought Ben was cool, until now.

Edward grabbed Ben by the shoulder and whipped him around. By the way Ben stumbled from the motion, Edward knew that he was drunk. "She's not a freak, and don't talk about her that way."

"Why, you got a thing for the Duck?" Ben smirked. "Because that's totally understandable, dude. She's kinda hot."

"You shut the fuck up!" Edward seethed, grabbing Ben by the collar. "Now you listen to me, Ben. If you call Isabella a freak or a duck then I'm going to rip your balls off. In fact, tell that to everyone. Her name is Isabella, and she deserves to be called by her real fucking name."

"Edward?" A small voice said. Edward still had Ben by his collar when he looked down to see Alice.

"Remember what I told you, Cheney. I don't give a shit if you're wasted," Edward pushed Ben away, watching as the guy stumbled away. Making sure that Ben was out of his sight, he then turned to Alice. "Where's Isabella?"

"She dropped me off, but she said something about getting gas at the station around the corner," She replied.

"Great, thanks," Edward said. "Oh, and good luck cleaning this place up tomorrow morning. Or … I guess _today._"

"This wasn't my idea, so Emmett is cleaning by himself." Alice rolled her eyes. "You know, I still think you're an asshole."

Edward chuckled. "Wow, thanks."

Alice sighed and crossed her arms over her chest. "But thanks … for looking out for Bella."

Edward didn't get a chance to reply, Alice was already heading up the stairs. He took that as his initiative to leave. He stepped out the front door and took a deep breath. It smelled like rain, but the skies were still clear. It was definitely colder now that Edward's buzz was gone, so he stuffed his hands into his jeans pockets and began to walk. Victoria was God knows where doing God knows what with James, but he never really expected her to give him a ride back. It was a long walk back to his house, but Edward didn't worry. Nothing happened in Forks, and just so long as he stayed near streetlights, he should be fine. He yawned, scratching the back of his head. Damn, he didn't realize how tired he was. He couldn't wait to take a shower and just lie in before the rest of the month. That sounded pretty fucking prestige.

He took this walk to think about how his life had changed since finding Isabella alone in the woods that night. Edward was definitely more stressed than he had ever been, but at the same time, he was more relaxed. He had been using an act for so long that he didn't even realize it anymore. However, with Isabella, he found that he wasn't putting up the act. For some reason, she put this affect on him that told him it was okay to just be … Edward. And yet, it scared him, being so bare.

God. What was she doing to him? Edward groaned and rubbed his eyes. He had been such a dick to her for so long and she forgave him so easily, and now it was seriously fucking him over. He found himself saying things around her that he never even heard himself say before. Like in the hospital earlier, he told her that he cared for her. He fucking _cared _for her. Where the hell did that come from? Edward hadn't even realized he truly meant it until Esme told them it was time to go home. That girl … she was something. And whatever that something was, it was different.

He couldn't describe what he was feeling when he heard what Ben was saying about Isabella. He was mad, he knew, but there was something else. Edward refused to believe it was jealousy, because hearing him call Isabella something besides her real name was what set him off. Or at least, that was what he was telling himself. That must have been it; it was more logical that way.

And then Alice thanked Edward for 'looking out for, Bella,' as she so put it. Edward liked to think that the tiny girl was thanking him for defending her friend, but he got the hint that Alice had a double meaning to her statement. He didn't dwell on it though, because he was nearing the gas station. Edward remembered that Alice said that Isabella had gone to get some gas. He doubted she would still be there.

However, he was wrong. Stepping out of the convenience store was Isabella herself. She was carrying a handful of candies and chocolate bars. Edward couldn't help the slight grin that began on his face. He was running to her now, trying to catch up with her before she left. Her long brown hair was swimming in the wind and her face looked calm, calmer than he had ever seen her before. And she looked pretty. She seemed to always look pretty.

Isabella was starting her luxurious car when he tapped on the window. She jumped in surprise and her hand flew to her chest. When she saw it was Edward, her eyebrows creased and she lowered the window.

"Did you come from Emmett's?" She asked.

"Yeah, do you think you can give me a ride?"

Isabella laughed, a melodic sound, and she unlocked the doors. "Climb in."

Edward did as he was told and slipped inside. Her car still smelled new, but it also smelled like strawberries. He eyed the chocolate bar she was eating. "Can I have some?"

"Sure," Isabella said as she broke off a piece.

Since he drank tonight, he needed the sugar. But all he could think about was Isabella. He wondered what it was about her that made him question everything he knew. The drinking, the partying, and the girls … it all seemed like second place to Isabella. No matter what he did, it would lead to wondering if she would be okay. Isabella believed that Edward deserved to be forgiven, but given the circumstances of his past, he didn't think the same way. He just hoped that one day he would make up for everything he did. Then, and only then, he would believe that he _truly _deserved her clemency. However, just sitting with her in her car was good enough. She was safe, and that was all that mattered.

* * *

**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

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**Hi, all! How are you? I hope you're well.**

**What did you think of this chapter? ****I know some of you were expecting some big showdown between Edward and Rosalie, and it will happen ... just not now. Edward isn't ready for that yet. ****What do you think about Edward constantly thinking about Bella? ****I personally love writing in Edward's POV. I don't know, something about this Edward is so intriguing, don't you think?**

**A lot of you tell me your guesses about Edward's problem, and I'm really shocked and excited at the same time. I think it's really obvious, but I don't know. I guess it's just really cool to hear your thoughts.**

**Funny story! Okay, not really funny ... more like coincidental funny. I was on ADF (A Different Forest, if you don't know) and was looking at all the fic recs that people were posting and what do you know? I see Bottled Lies being rec'd and people actually agreeing and saying how much they enjoy it. Thanks so much you guys, that really means a lot! And those of you who found this story via ADF, WELCOME! I'm glad you joined this journey with me. It's going to be kick ass and just fun all around haha.**

**I watched Cowboys & Aliens ... I thought it was okay. Too much action for me. I really enjoyed Rise of the Planet of the Apes, though (Not going to lie, I watched it because of Tom Felton)! I also so the Glee movie - so cute! The little Warbler is just the sweetest thing ever. I want to see Friends with Benefits and Crazy Stupid Love - are those good?**

**Okay, that's all I have to say. I should really try and stop writing such long A/N's haha.**

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**Karina.**


	17. Chapter Seventeen: Discourse

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a box of mechanical pencils and post-its. Back-To-School shopping: check! Haha I already have binders and paper ... I really don't need anything else.

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_I think we're all afraid_

_That we may be alone, alone down here_

_We all want to have some faith_

_At least that's true in my case, to just believe_

**_More - Tyrone Wells_**

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Chapter Seventeen: Discourse

_**Bella**_

There was a lot of crying after Bella told Alice the truth. Alice continuously voiced how sorry she was and that she should have known better and caught what was going on sooner. Bella quickly told Alice that she shouldn't be blaming herself, especially since she was the reason Bella didn't commit suicide. The thought of having someone caring about her was what stopped her from piercing the glass any further. Of course, this made Alice bawl even more. Bella, not knowing what else to do, hugged her friend. It wasn't until Alice wrapped her arms around her did Bella realize that she was crying as well. However, she didn't know if the tears fell because of the tragedy that was her story, the sigh of Alice's sobbing, or the relief that she didn't have to hide anymore. None of Forks, but six people, knew Bella's truth. Two of them were out of the country and four of them she knew she could trust.

If someone told Bella that she would be telling people her secrets a month ago, she would have fucking laughed. She wouldn't have stopped laughing, either. This situation never entered Bella's mind, and yet here she was, confessing like the world was going to end. It was like she couldn't stop talking about it, and it actually felt _good. _Bella never thought she would feel that way, but she did. It was strange, really.

It should have freaked Alice the fuck out that Bella had been through so much shit, but she just sat there. Giggling as she wiped her own tears away. Alice had been such a good friend to Bella even though she didn't have to be, and now that she had revealed her past, Bella couldn't help but feel closer to her. They were both broken, and they were both damn good at hiding it. They seemed to have this understanding with each other, that even though they were both hurt, they didn't sympathize the other. They just … got each other.

"God, she's such a bitch," Alice said after Bella told her the reason Edward was such a dick. "I really don't get what my brother sees in her." Bella only shrugged, because she was wondering the same thing. "And Edward, what a dumb shit! How can he believe that skank?"

"They're best friends," Bella mumbled.

"Oh, and now you're suddenly defending him? I mean, I get that he helped you out and shit, but he was such a douche to you for a reason that wasn't even true. Who does stuff like that? God, what an asshole."

"He _is _an asshole, Alice. I'm not denying that."

"So he's just not the asshole you thought he was?"

"I'm not denying that either," Bella sighed. "Edward's such a different person compared to the one he tries to portray himself to be. It's weird, but it's true."

"I'll believe it when I see it," Alice stated. "You know, Bella, you really should be wanting to rip his head off or something. I don't know, _anything _to make him pay for all of the shit he has done to you."

Bella nodded, agreeing with Alice. It was true – she _should _want to do that to Edward. She thought about different ways of doing it many times, but every time she would feel guilty. She didn't know why she felt that way, but she just did. Bella still felt that forgiving Edward was the right thing to do, but she still wondered why she didn't just hate him. It would be so much easier that way. She wondered why she couldn't bring herself to feel the same way about Edward before he found her in the woods. Any trace of malice and hate was just gone. And there was something about Edward that made Bella see something. She saw that he was a good person trapped inside the stereotypes of Forks. He was a good person blinded by his passion. And because she knew this, all of his past actions seemed to make sense. It should have made Bella want to push him down a flight of stairs, but it didn't. It aggravated her that she couldn't understand why that was so.

"I don't know, Alice. I just don't know."

**x x x x x x**

She had forgotten all about the napkin the minute Edward told her his accusations regarding Brant. At the time, she had been so pissed at him that she couldn't even think straight. Little did she know that stuffing the napkin into the pocket of Alice's trendy leather jacket would eventually lead her to where she was now – at the gas station a block away from Alice's house.

After many hours of having a heart to heart with Alice, Bella realized how much she had missed out on not having a girlfriend. It was never Bella's fault that she didn't have friends, but she was glad that she had Alice now. She knew that no matter how cruel it would get at school, Alice would always be by her side. It was weird not being so independent for once, but Bella figured she would get used to it.

"Fifteen dollars," The old man working at the gas pump said. Bella pulled out the money and handed it to him before stepping out of her car and going into the convenience store. She and Alice had shared a slice of pizza since neither of them had been hungry, but now it was late into the night and Bella's stomach growled for food. Given two chocolate bars, three packs of candy and an energy drink were far from healthy, but Bella didn't really care. Bella was also really, really tired. She had quite the eventful day and was ready to just fall asleep.

When she dropped Alice off not too long ago, Bella wasn't prepared to see that Emmett was throwing a party. Of course Bella wouldn't have known about it since she wasn't usually invited to those kinds of events, but she was shocked that Alice didn't stay and have a good time. From what she had said earlier, Alice had been popular and probably went to many parties.

"I'm not that girl anymore," Alice had told her, seeming to have read Bella's mind before turning her head back to her home. All of the lights were on and the music was blaring, the lawn littered with people. Bella knew that she would never be able to survive an environment like that. It was too rowdy and out of place for her – she wouldn't know what to do with herself. "I haven't been for a while."

"Do you miss being that person?" Bella had asked.

"Honestly? No, I don't. It was fun and all, but after a while keeping up appearances gets exhausting."

Bella would never forget those words. She never thought of popularity having its bad sides. She remembered when Edward told her all the things he did to maintain his reputation, and at the time, Bella thought it was ridiculous. However, after hearing Alice saying that being admired isn't all it's worked up to be, Bella wondered if people did certain things just for the sake of status. It made sense, though. Edward was looked up to at Forks High; people were constantly trying to get on his good side. It made sense that once he ridiculed Bella that everyone else would. Edward probably didn't mean for it to go as far as it did, but the others saw it as an opportunity to prove to him that they were worthy. It sickened Bella that people would go to such lengths just to be accepted, and yet, she couldn't really judge. If there was anything she had learned from herself, it was that people were most often misunderstood.

She was starting the engine when a light tap on the window startled her. There, Edward stood. His hair was messier than it usually was, almost like he ran his hand through it too many times, his eyes were rimmed red, and his skin was pale. He looked like shit, and Bella guessed that he had gone to Emmett's party. For some reason, the thought made her feel … was it jealousy? No, it couldn't be. And even if it was, that would be ridiculous. Bella had no reason to be jealous over Edward going to a party. It wasn't her scene anyway.

Some of the color began to return to Edward's complexion as he finished off the piece of chocolate she had given him. Bella offered him the other chocolate bar and laughed when he broke off a piece of his and gave it to her, almost like he was trying to make it even.

"How was your night?" Edward asked as he crumpled the wrapper in his hand.

Bella stopped at a traffic light. "It was … eventful," She opened the bag of fuzzy peaches and popped one in her mouth. "How about your night at Emmett's?"

"Nothing too exciting," Edward stole a fuzzy peach. "In all honesty I'm just ready to go home."

Bella nodded, keeping her eyes straight. She wasn't having trouble staying awake, but was still exhausted nonetheless. What were keeping her awake were the candy and the smell of alcohol radiating from Edward. Even sitting beside him in her car kept her eyes open. She could feel him watching her again, and even though she wasn't usually bothered by it, this time she felt self-conscious. It was so late; she probably looked like shit, because that was how she felt at the moment. His staring was not good for her when she was driving, she was going to make note of that.

Edward suddenly groaned. "We are going to be in _so _much shit."

"Why?" Bella's brows creased.

"Curfew was at midnight."

A glance at the clock made Bella curse. It was three in the morning – how the hell did that happen? She didn't think that it was that late, it really only felt like it was eleven o'clock. No wonder she was so hungry and her body felt like it was ready to collapse. Even so, she couldn't wrap her head around the fact that it was already three in the morning.

"I guess time really does fly," Bella grimaced.

Edward chuckled and ran a hand through his already disarrayed hair. "The good thing is that my parents sleep at nine, so they won't even know that we came in late."

"We just have to be really quiet, then."

"I'm talking stealth mode, Isabella." They were approaching his house when Edward added, "Just follow my lead."

Once they were parked and were getting out of the car, Bella noticed Edward slightly stumble. "How much have you had to drink, Edward?"

"A good amount."

"Okay, so we're fucked," Bella locked her car doors, wincing when the locks seemed to echo throughout the neighborhood.

"Have a little faith in me, yeah?" Edward teased in a whisper. "Besides, I'm fine. I've sobered up a whole lot since the party."

"If this is you sober, I don't even want to think of what you're like when you're wasted," Bella whispered back to him. As she walked up the porch steps, she stole a glance next door. There was no life inside that house, and there wouldn't be for a while. It made it seem like the house stopped breathing, and that sent shivers up Bella spine.

"Remember," Edward pressed his finger to his lips as he stuck the key into the lock. "We have to be quiet."

Bella rolled her eyes. "Got it."

Pushing through the door, Edward made sure that all was quiet before looking to Bella and nodding his head inside. She tip toed inside and closed the door behind her as gently as she could. No lights were on, and it made the Cullen house look a little scary. But then she felt Edward grab her wrist and she felt calm again. Glancing away from the black foyer, Bella caught Edward's gaze. His bright green eyes seemed to be the only thing she could see … but then again, she could also see his lips …

Bella snapped herself out of it. God, she really needed to rest.

The minute Edward let Bella's wrist go, she suddenly felt cold. She ignored the strange feeling and tried to focus on not getting caught. However, she didn't get to focus for too long because Edward almost tripped going up the stairs. He grabbed the banister at the same time Bella steadied his shoulders. Her heart was beating fast and loud, so loud that she was afraid that it would wake up Carlisle and Esme. Though her heart wasn't worked up from the scare of Edward falling, because he was obviously _not_ as sober as he claimed to be, but because of their proximity. Her face was so close to the back of his neck that her nose practically brushed his smooth skin, his scent was still the same warm cinnamon smell. They both stayed still for what seemed like hours, until Bella patted his back, telling him to keep on going.

"Thanks," He whispered, his voice slightly raspy.

Once they continued their journey, Bella responded with, "Still think you're sober?"

Edward's quiet laugh made Bella's heart beat hard against her chest.

Bella sighed when they finally made it up the stairs. She could hear soft snoring coming from Carlisle and Esme's bedroom, and knew that they had managed not to get caught. She was approaching the guest room when she noticed Edward stumbling towards his room. Bella knew that what she was about to do could have been a bad thing, but she ignored it.

She guided Edward to the door and set him on his bed. Edward rolled himself into a lying position as Bella opened his window. Some fresh air wouldn't hurt. She quickly went downstairs to grab a glass of water and some Tylenol, making sure that she didn't make too much noise all the while. Once she was back in Edward's room, she noticed that he was sound asleep. He was sleeping on his stomach now, his face towards the open window. Bella placed the water and Tylenol on his nightstand with full intention of just walking out. But of course, she stole one last glance. This glance lasted longer than it should have, but she couldn't help it.

Bella had never seen Edward sleep before, not even when he was hiding her in this very room. He looked calm and relaxed, like he didn't have a care in the world. She had never seen this on Edward before, and she wondered why. She shook her head and sighed, turning her gaze and walking out the door. Bella was eager for the hours of sleep that she so desperately needed.

**x x x x x x**

Bella didn't wake up until one in the afternoon – she had never slept in so late before. Phil would have hunted her down if she wasn't doing her chores by then, but Bella had to remember that she didn't have to worry anymore. Phil was gone and he couldn't hurt her. However, that didn't mean Bella could forget what he had done to her. She didn't think she could ever forget, and that scared her. Eventually, the memories would catch up to her, and Bella didn't want to witness her downfall.

Stretching her arms over head, Bella yawned. The room was too bright, though after blinking a couple of times, she adjusted to the light. She ripped the sheets off her body and got ready. After a quick shower Bella dressed into jeans and a striped knit sweater. She felt refreshed once she applied her makeup and did her hair; no doubt it was because of her long sleep. It was a good sleep too – she didn't remember her dream, if she dreamt at all.

She wondered what she was going to do for the day. If Carlisle or Esme needed help with anything, Bella didn't mind assisting, but if they didn't then she didn't have a clue. Edward would probably be busy doing God knows what, but even if he was free Bella highly doubted that he would want to spend his Sunday with her. Bella could always call Alice, since last night the girl constantly told Bella that she would always be available because she didn't want to hang around her brother. Ever since Alice told Bella what happened in California, she was shocked that Alice was so cold to Emmett. She wondered why that was.

"Good afternoon," Bella greeted as she entered the kitchen. Esme smiled at her as she continued to make whatever it was that she was baking – it smelled really good. Edward was, once again, wearing his plaid pajama pants and no shirt. Bella could feel her cheeks begin to grow warm as she took a seat next to him. He was hunched over a bowl of cereal, but even so, she noticed how red his eyes were and how pale he looked. He was definitely hung over.

"Cereal?" He asked, his voice still thick with sleep.

"Please."

Edward grabbed the empty bowl in front of her and poured her cocoa puffs. She grinned to him in thanks before retrieving her cereal. He gave her a smirk, and Bella knew that he was proud that they hadn't been caught. Bella shook her head slightly and tried to cover her smile as she dug into her breakfast. Esme stuck what she was making into the oven and left the kitchen, leaving Edward and Bella alone.

Neither of them spoke much, merely mumbles of how cold the weather had gotten and how they would need to get more cocoa puffs. Sometimes Bella would look up from her cereal the same time Edward would and they would lock gazes, which caused her to avert her eyes elsewhere. It happened quite often, actually, and it was almost like they were playing a game. A really fucked up game that Bella had know idea how to win at.

They were cleaning the dishes when Esme took the pan out of the oven.

"I'm going to do a few errands," She announced. "And by the way, you two are grounded."

"What? Why?" Edward asked, appalled. The reason was quite obvious, but Bella knew that he was just trying to keep up appearances. She, on the other hand, stood completely still.

"I know you two came home much later than your curfew, so nice try," Esme said.

Edward groaned at the same time Bella said, "Sorry."

"Okay, because Bella is our guest, I'm only grounding you for today. But next time I won't be so generous, so don't let it happen again," She scolded. "In the mean time, no television and no computer," Esme walked over to the counter and picked up Edward's keys, "No driving either. You guys are to stay here all day, and don't think that you can cheat or sneak off. Carlisle is upstairs in his study and has amazing hearing."

Esme held out her hand as Bella fished her keys out of her pocket and placed it in Esme's care.

"But, Mom, I have to go to work at five," Edward said.

"I'll be home by then, so I can drop you off."

"Are you serious?"

"Dead serious," Esme replied before slipping on her jacket. "I'll be back, so be good."

Once she was out the door and out of ear's reach, Edward mumbled, "Well, fuck."

She thought the exact same thing. "What is there to do, then? No internet, no TV, no _nothing._" Guess her plans to call Alice had no future.

Edward scratched the back of his head. "I guess we should get to work on that creative writing assignment. I mean, we are probably the only ones who haven't actually started writing."

"Shit, I forgot all about that," Bella sighed. "I guess we should do it then, since we have nothing better to do."

"Well, it's either that or _Cranium_."

Bella laughed. "I'd rather do the assignment. Go get changed, already."

"Yes, ma'am.

As Edward got ready, Bella got a head start on the assignment. They had really only gone over the plot, and even that was vague. They needed to conjure characters and conflicts, and Bella didn't have a clue how they were going to do that. The whole collaboration ordeal was ridiculous, and Bella resented Ms. Anderson for thinking it was such a great idea. Sharing her thoughts made Bella nervous, because she was so fucked in the head and people would start judging. The students of Forks' High already had their ideas of Bella, and she didn't want to add to their stereotypes.

She sighed and rubbed the back of her neck. Sometimes Bella wondered what her life would have been like if Phil didn't abuse her and Renee didn't neglect her, that Rosalie didn't lie to Edward and the kids at her school didn't alienate her. What would Bella have been like if she just lived a normal life? That was the question that haunted her the most, because she couldn't imagine what it would be like. No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't think of an outcome. The life she was living now was just too real and too dominating, which worried her a lot.

Yes. A lot of things worried Bella – she wouldn't doubt that.

A loud bang was followed by muffled words and Bella couldn't help but laugh. Her laugh then caused her thoughts to go to Edward. Alice's words constantly played in her head – the righteousness that was punishing Edward for all the hell he had put her through. It stressed Bella how much she just _didn't _want to torture Edward. If given the chance this time, last year, Bella would have happily taken the offer. However, at this moment, and maybe even for a while, she just couldn't think of doing such a thing. She didn't know what was stopping her, but she wanted to find out. If she didn't soon, she was afraid that something else might happen. Bella wasn't sure if she wanted to discover what that _something else _might be.

Edward came back looking substantially healthier, but most importantly, he had a shirt on. He had a booklet in his hand, raising it up. "I forgot that I promised Ms. McGrath that I would go over this play. Do you mind if you work on the assignment for a bit while I read this?"

"Yeah, no problem," Bella said nonchalantly, even though she was inwardly relieved.

The couch sighed as Edward took a seat. They were on opposite ends, and that was just how Bella preferred it. For some reason, she couldn't think straight when she was around him lately. The distance at least gave her some room to think while she _tried _to focus on the assignment, and not the way Edward's brows creased as he read. Or the way he would lick his finger before turning each page. Or the way he constantly shifted positions, almost like he had too many things on his mind.

Nope. Bella wasn't paying attention to him at all.

Instead, she was furiously writing down everything that came to mind. Edward's idea was vague, but really intriguing – she found herself constantly thinking of different ways for their story to progress. She was still trying to wrap her mind around the fact that Edward wasn't as stupid as he lead others to believe because she always thought intellect was something to be proud of. Though Bella had come to terms with the fact that reputation was important to him, she didn't understand why he would lie about his intelligence. Surely the people of Forks wouldn't degrade him because he was smart, but if they did, then Bella _really _needed to leave the superficial town.

Edward closed the booklet and dropped it on the coffee table. "Did you not like the play?" She asked.

"It's a love story – I don't do those," He shrugged. "What have you got for the assignment?"

Behind his shrug and nonchalant tone, Bella knew that Edward was lying. She was kind of miffed that he was trying to hide what how he really felt, especially since she was beginning to think that underneath all of the egotistical comments was a genuine person.  
"Are you blowing it off because you just don't want to be caught in a school production?"

"No, I just really don't like the plot," Edward stated, trying to convince her with a shake of his head.

God, he was a good actor, _really_ fucking good in fact. However, Bella wasn't convinced. "Look, Edward, I know that being Mr. Popularity and having good cred is important to you, but don't let shit like that get in your way. People at our school look up to you, so don't be a douche about it. You really screwed up when you treated me like crap because of what Rosalie told you, so why don't you make it up to me by not letting stereotypes blind you for once," Bella said with more force than she had intended. Edward was staring at her with a blank expression, but she knew that he was processing her words. His phone rang, but it was almost like he didn't hear it. "Aren't you going to answer that?"

Edward blinked a couple of times, like he was waking up from a daze, before taking his phone out of his pocket. He shook his head and set the phone down beside the script. "No … it's Rose."

Bella only nodded, because she really didn't have anything else to say. Edward had taken the notebook from her and began scanning through different things she had written down, making his own notes and letting her know what he thought, but she was barely listening. The world outside of this house was suddenly becoming more and more real, and with tomorrow fast approaching, Bella couldn't think straight.

What would happen at school tomorrow? She knew that people would go back to ignoring her and scolding her behind her back, but what about Edward? That was what was stressing her the most. She wondered if Edward would change or if he would just go back to ignoring her. Her own speech was reeling in her mind, and she realized the truth of her words. Edward's cred meant a lot to him, so where would that leave Bella? She wanted to believe that she would just turn her head and continue her own life at school, but that was far from the truth.

Worst of all, Bella didn't know if she could handle seeing the old Edward again.

* * *

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**Hi, everyone! I hope you're all doing well :)**

**Nothing much happened in this chapter, except for Bella wondering what's going to happen at school the next day. Lots of you have been wondering the same thing. That will happen next chapter! Also, lots of you want more ExB action. Trust me, I do too. But you have to give these two some time. It will happen though, so don't fret! **

**My schedule for school came in the mail ... damn. School is starting September 1st :/ NOT excited. My dance schedule also came in - I dance on Mondays-Wednesdays. Pretty chill schedule, if you ask me. I usually dance all week. However, because I'm only dancing these days that means Monday-Wednesday will be packed. I'll try to keep up the weekly updates during the school year, but don't be mad if it's a little late, okay? Just know that i'll be doing my damnedest to get these updates up and going, because things are just starting for this story.**

**Okay it's one in the morning here. I'm going to sleep so I can watch the second season of Supernatural all day tomorrow :) haha.**

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**Karina.  
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	18. Chapter Eighteen: Tribulation

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own Joe Brooks' new EP, 'A Reason To Swim'. Amazing music! Go get it :)

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_I don't know if it's the same game_

_If it's the same game, although you say no._

_I don't know if it's the same game,_

_If it's the same game, although it's the same control_

**_Colors - The pass._**

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Chapter Eighteen: Tribulation

_**Bella**_

Edward was already gone when Bella poured herself a bowl of cocoa puffs.

"Calculus tutorial," Esme explained to her, though she knew better. No one in their right mind would go to tutorial, for any subject, an hour and a half before school started. And even if they really needed the help, Edward had proven that he was bright.

_Calculus tutorial, my ass, _Bella inwardly scolded.

In all honesty, she didn't know why she was so bitchy about it. She had a feeling that Edward would want to keep up his reputation at school, and had spent all night preparing herself for it. What did she expect? That she and Edward would drive to school together like buds? Fuck that – it just wasn't meant to be reality, maybe not even fantasy. It was really ridiculous, since they hadn't defined what their status was. Not enemies, not friends, not in between. Neither of them had brought it up, though Bella didn't really want to know what they were now. She was afraid the answer would disappoint her, and she wasn't quite sure why she felt that way.

Self-discovery was on Bella's metaphorical 'To Do' list.

Last night, when Esme had come through on her punishment and dropped Edward off at the diner, Bella was left alone in her room to just _think_. The funny thing, though it really wasn't funny at all, was that Bella didn't know what to mull over. Granted she had a lot on her mind, but for some reason, she just couldn't dwell on it. Phil and Renee leaving. Alice's escape. Rosalie's lie. The cops. The hospital. The empty house next door. The creative writing assignment. Charles Garland … Bella just wasn't able to wrap her head around any of that shit. Whenever she tried, she would eventually find herself thinking of Edward, of what was on his mind and why he always seemed to be cautious of himself. Like his actions scared him. The way he would be an asshole one minute to a bearable being the next. He was causing her head to spin, whether it was in a good or bad way, Bella needed to figure out.

She needed to leave a little early since she was going to pick up Alice before heading to school. She found that ever since she had Alice, she didn't mind being at school a little early. Before, when she was battling the bullying alone, Bella made sure she arrived at school no earlier before quarter to nine. It was nice to know that she didn't have to face everything by herself, yet it scared her at the same time.

"Bella!" Esme called as she touched the doorknob. "I'm glad I caught you before you left. Can you give Edward his lunch? He forgot it."

"Sure, Esme." She took the brown paper bag in her hands. Bella's voice seemed stronger, more sure, even though that was not how she felt.

"Thank you so much, Dear," Esme kissed her cheek. "Have a good day."

Pushing through the door, Bella felt that Edward's lunch weighed more than it actually did. Inside were probably juice, a sandwich, and an apple, and yet it was like there were a million bricks instead. She wasn't looking forward to passing the paper bag to Edward – had no idea how he would react. Whether he would be a dick or somewhat nice. Edward was so unpredictable and sometimes it excited Bella because she usually knew how to act. With Edward, she felt like she wasn't aloud to get too close, but was aloud to embrace him as well. This time, however, Bella wasn't eager to see Edward's unpredictable demeanor.

Her mind was elsewhere as she drove to Alice's, and she didn't even realize how hard she was gripping the steering wheel until she was parked on the driveway. Bella's hands were sore as she stretched them, the color returning to her flesh. Alice, of course, sat down in the car with a grin on her face. She claimed that her new boots had come in the mail and that she couldn't wait to wear them. Bella merely nodded her head, trying to make it seem like she understood Alice's enthusiasm.

Alice turned off the radio and decided to sing the entire time. She had a terrible voice, so terrible that it was an insult to every artist whose song she started to harmonize. Alice knew she wasn't good at all, but decided to do it anyway. Apparently Bella seemed on edge, she didn't disagree with that, and needed to cheer up before the day started. Eventually it worked. By the time Alice began belting out Katy Perry's, _E.T., _Bella had parked and was in a fit of giggles.

"Okay, stop," laughed, Bella as she wiped away a tear. "You're killing me."

"At least it worked. Now we can discuss the importance of chemistry. When are we going to use this shit?"

"Never. It's definitely unimportant."

"Thank you!" Just then, the bell rang. "Fuck my life, I really hate that class. We better get going though."

Bella was about to follow suit when her wandering eyes found Edward. He was leaning against his car and was surrounded by his friends. They were laughing and pushing each other around in a playful manner. None of them seemed to care that the bell had rung and classes were beginning. Only Edward, whose eyes seemed to constantly glance at the front doors, seemed to become impatient. Yet, he was still chuckling and making conversation. Bella thought it was weird that no one else caught that Edward was putting up an act, especially not his friends.

She thanked her lucky stars when the crowd around Edward began to retreat his vehicle. He pushed himself off the hood when Bella approached him. "Hey."

Edward's eyes quickly looked at his departing friends before going back to her. "Hi."

"Um," Bella mumbled. God, this was awkward. "Your mom told me to give you your lunch."

"Oh, thanks," Edward muttered, taking the paper bag from her. He glanced back to his friends. "Look, I have to get to class."

"Yeah, me too," She said sheepishly.

"See you later," He said before he ran back to his group.

Bella was left standing on the parking lot, just staring at Edward. He had left her like he was in a hurry, like just standing next to her was a disease. She shouldn't have been surprised that Edward would want to keep his status, and in order to keep it he couldn't talk to her or interact in any way outside his home. However, Bella couldn't hide how hurt she was. The Edward he had shown Bella always seemed to be overcome by the persona he had created, and she didn't like it. This was the Edward that had called her names and mocked her countless of times. This was the Edward who only cared about stereotypical things and didn't give a shit about grades. This Edward was betraying the one she knew, the boy who was humble and protective. The one who cared too much and put others before himself.

And worst of all, Bella felt like the Edward she had grown to live with had betrayed her.

It got worse as each class passed along. Bella didn't pay attention to what her social teacher had to say or what her math teacher was professing about trigonometry – her mind kept going back to what happened in the parking lot. Her insides ached, especially in the chest area. She didn't understand how someone could be so good at hiding their true self with a false persona. For all she knew the person Edward shown himself to be outside of school could also be false, but no matter how much she tried to convince herself of this, she just couldn't believe it. There was a voice inside her head that was telling her that the person who Edward was outside of this social life was the real one. That voice just hurt Bella even more.

Bella was walking to her next class, French, and she was just _not _looking forward to it. She wanted it to be lunch already so she could talk to Alice about how hurt she was. Bella needed a good pick-me-up, because her self-loathing was just not helping her in any way. If she was feeling this low at eleven-forty-five a.m. and still had to be within these school walls until three-thirty p.m., she couldn't imagine how bad it would be by then. She was glad she _at least _had French with Alice, even though they really couldn't talk too much, her presence would be enough. Plus there was phys-ed … God, she hated that class as well. Fucking Angela Webber and her fake ass hair …

"Bro, you know that nerd, Dimitri? Man, he's such a kiss up. I really just want to duck tape his mouth every time I walk into Spanish," A senior guy with a football jacket said as the group of boys laughed. "'_Ms. Sanchez you misspelled that, and might I say, you look mighty fine,'_" He mocked. "Bitch, please. Get the fuck out."

Again, the group of boys howled and laughed, but in the mess of sounds was a particular voice that caught Bella's attention. "God, what a loser."

Her head snapped up from the ground at the same time green eyes caught her. His usual stare would have made Bella blush, but with his eyes wide and his jaw slack, she only shook her head at him. She knew Dimitri – he was also a junior, and was her biology partner last year. He was pretty nice and was the only one, besides Alice, that didn't succumb to the bullying that Forks High did for Bella. For Edward to call him a loser … well, she wondered what he said about her when he was out with his friends. This only proved that this side of Edward would never go away, and that was tragic.

She walked away with her eyes back down again. Bella could feel him watching her, but she didn't look back. She couldn't face Edward when he was acting that way, because she didn't know who he was.

Alice seemed to know that something was wrong the minute Bella took her seat. "Edward?" She presumed.

Bella shrugged. "I guess some things just don't change."

"Maybe," Alice sighed, eyeing Bella. "Maybe not."

"_Bonjour, classe! Sortez s'il vous plaît un stylo et un papier. Aujourd'hui nous écrivons beaucoup de notes," _Mr. Cormier announced as he entered the room, not allowing Bella to ask Alice what she meant.

Pulling out her notebook and pen, Bella began scribbling whatever Mr. Cormier wrote on the board. No matter how hard she tried to focus on what she was writing down, Bella couldn't keep her mind off of what she witnessed in the hallway. And then, her thoughts were interrupted when she could feel someone looking at her. Bella glanced away from the board and saw that Rosalie was glaring at her with her icy blue eyes. She wasn't even subtle about it. This was nothing new – Rosalie always found away to give Bella dirty looks.

However, as the class prolonged, she noticed that while Rosalie would take time to write notes, she would still make the effort to narrow her eyes at Bella. The more she did it Bella noticed that it was almost like Rosalie was trying to figure something out. Her eyebrows would quirk slightly and she would tap her fingers, and then she would just straight up glare at her once again.

"God, what's that bitch's problem?" Alice whispered to Bella.

Mr. Cormier's back was still facing the class so Bella leaned over. "Do you think she knows that I know?"

"What, about her scheme?" Alice peered over at Rosalie subtly before slightly shaking her head. "Nah, I don't think so. But she definitely thinks something is up."

"Well whatever it is, it's freaking me the fuck out. She looks like the ice queen."

"That's because she _is _one, that crazy ass bitch."

Bella and Alice ended their conversation when Mr. Cormier gave them knowing looks. The conversation could wait 'till lunch anyways – there was only ten minutes before the bell rang. In that time, Bella did her best to ignore Rosalie's stare and any thoughts regarding Edward. She tried to focus on things like how she was kind of pissed that her hair was being a bitch and didn't co-operate the way she wanted it to, or how the guy in front of her seemed to itch his neck a lot. Gross. He needed to check that shit out.

"Out of my way, Daisy," Rosalie seethed as the class filed out of the room when the class ended.

Bella grumbled as Rosalie bumped her shoulder.

Alice only rolled her eyes at the ice queen, grabbing Bella's hand and leading them to the cafeteria. They sat in their usual table in the corner of the room, sighing when they pulled their lunches out. Loud chatter filled the cafeteria, the smell of today's special floating the air. Their table seemed so separate from the rest of the room, though Bella didn't mind. Alice didn't either.

"Now tell me what that asshole did," Alice said as she pulled out an apple.

Bella began to unwrap her sandwich. "There's really nothing to say but that he seems to be okay with being a jerk whenever we're at school. I know I shouldn't care because he's been so rude to me for such a long time … but I don't know. I guess it just shocked me to see that side of him again."

"You have to understand, Bella, that being so high on the social ladder comes with a price. If you want to be that high up, you gotta act a certain way. Most of the time it's fun and what not, but it gets fucking exhausting and some people get lost in it all. Look at my brother," Alice nodded toward the center of the room. Bella didn't need to see – she already knew what Alice was trying to say. "Back in Cali he was one of many on the football team with charismatic personalities. Here he's one of _few_, and he's taking advantage of it. I don't even know who he is anymore."

"So what you're trying to tell me, Alice, is that popularity gets the best of everyone," Bella tried to understand.

"Not everyone," Alice shook her head, looking back at the center of the room. Suddenly, she had a smirk and leaned back in her chair, biting her apple. "Some of us eventually find our way back to civilization."

Before Bella could unravel Alice's meaning, a tender voice asked, "Mind if I sit here?"

She slowly looked up, her eyes meeting Edward's. Just then, Bella saw the side of Edward she was comfortable with, and her heart clenched. And then she remembered how much of an asshole he had been earlier and she didn't know what to do anymore.

"I don't know, Edward," Alice shrugged. "What do you think, Bella?"

"Um, sure," Bella said uneasily. She was confused and Alice seemed to encourage this nonsense.

Edward pulled the chair beside Bella out before taking a seat. It was almost like the whole entire cafeteria turned silent the minute he sat down, just staring at him. _Staring at all three of them._ He didn't seem to notice what was going on, But Bella did. All of those eyes on her made her nervous and self-conscious, but Alice only shrugged and continued eating her apple.

"So, Edward. What brings you to this neck of the woods?" Alice asked.

He pulled the contents out of the paper bag – Bella couldn't help but stare at it. "Instinct, I guess. That, and the fact that they're betting on stupid shit."

By, _they_, Bella guessed he was talking about the people sitting in the center of the room.

"Let me guess," Alice clicked her tongue. "They're betting on who's going to fuck who and who will make the first move."

"How'd you know?"

"My observations have led me to believe that cliques tend to be the same anywhere you go. Very typical, very boring."

"Well, Brandon, I'm surprised. I didn't think you would be so understanding of that kind of crowd."

Alice scoffed. "You'd be shocked at how muchI know. I used to be one of you, _Cullen._"

"Oh, back in your Cali days?" Edward smirked. "And what made you switch sides?"

"Experience and morality."

Edward's smirk faltered slightly at Alice's answer, but he covered it quickly. The two of them easily kept conversation, and it was all surprisingly pleasant. Not too long ago, Alice was calling him an asshole, and now they were talking about the things that went on in the popular crowd. It didn't make sense. Well … it didn't make sense until Bella caught Alice giving her subtle looks, in which she understood Alice telling her to include herself. That was easier said than done, however. Bella had no experience whatsoever when it came to that crowd and had nothing to say on it. That and the fact that she was still shocked that Edward was actually sitting at their table.

The golden boy of the school was actually sitting at the loser table – it was kind of surreal.

As she chewed on her food, not saying a word, Bella stole a glance at the center of the room. Just as she expected, everyone sitting at that table was staring at Edward in awe – whispering things to each other, shrugging and shaking their heads. No doubt they were wondering why the most popular guy at school was sitting with the new girl and the duck. Questioning if there was something wrong with Edward, if he was rebelling against them.

And then there was Rosalie, her eyes narrowing and her nostrils flaring. She was biting the inside of her cheek to obviously keep herself from exploding. She was fuming so much that her blonde hair could easily catch on fire. Emmett was rubbing her shoulders and whispering in her ear, but she was still on edge. Rosalie seemed to be plotting Edward's death as she glared at him. Edward didn't seem to notice, and if he did, he didn't look like he really gave a shit.

"Earth to Bella?" Alice's hand waved in her face.

"Huh?" Bella turned her gaze away from Rosalie. "What did I miss?"

"I just asked you what class you have next."

Bella scratched the back of her head. "Creative writing is every other day, remember? I have free period today. I'll probably just go to the library and finish my social homework."

"Lucky bitch, I have physics next."

"You seriously have the shittiest schedule."

"You're telling me!"

Both Bella and Alice were laughing, when she noticed that Edward was chuckling at their exchange. All three of them were in fits of giggles then, and there really was no reason for them to be laughing. It felt normal, yet odd. However, the normalcy was so overpowering that Bella didn't even stress how weird it must look to everyone watching them. Then there was this one moment when Bella turned her head the same time Edward turned his, and they were just staring at each other. They were still smiling, but a little out of breath. The way he was looking at her though – it reminded her of the better Edward. The one she was grounded with the day before. And just as quick as this Edward had returned, the spell was broken at the sound of the bell. They both jerked backwards and looked away.

He cleared his throat. "I better get to class …"

"I have to go to my locker …" Bella mumbled at the same time.

A few seconds passed before Edward said, "Well, this was fun," he grinned at both Alice and Bella. "We'll have to do this more often."

"You're still an asshole, Cullen," Alice said.

"Never said I wasn't," Edward replied in a laugh before slinging his backpack over his shoulder and walking away.

She and Alice were walking out of the cafeteria when Bella caught Edward leaning against the wall closest to the doors. He winked once at her before pushing off the wall and exiting through the doors. Bella knew she was blushing, and she shook her head. She threw her paper bag away and sighed. Looking back up Alice, she saw that she had an expectant expression.

"What?" Bella asked. Alice quirked a brow, glancing at the doors and back to her. Bella knew that Alice had seen their exchange and probably wanted answers. However, she didn't have any. She couldn't explain what just happened because she really didn't know herself. So she shrugged and they continued walking together before Alice had to walk down the other hall to her next class.

When Bella reached her locker and opened it, she pulled out her social textbook and a binder. Even when the warning bell rang and students made their way to their classes, she was left staring at the top shelf of her locker. Bella pulled out her pencil case and gulped, more confused than ever about what she thought she knew about Edward.

**x x x x x x**

Bella was sitting at one of the tables at the far end of the school library. It was disturbingly quiet so Bella popped in her iPod and began tapping her foot to Lady GaGa as she worked on her social homework. Having to write a source analysis on the French Revolution was something she really didn't want to do but did it because she had nothing else to occupy herself during her free period. During free period people would usually go find their friends and leave the school for forty-five minutes before next period started. However, Bella only had one friend, and she was currently stuck in physics.

_The Tennis Court Oath …_

She sighed and ran a hand through her hair. God, this source analysis was so stupid. Bella already dreaded doing this during her spare and it had only been ten minutes. Half an hour left until next period, and already she couldn't wait.

_This political cartoon is stupid, _Bella thought, _just like the way Edward's little quirks make me feel._

How could everything become more confusing after the man she feared the most left town? Surely things should have been a lot less complicated, but no. Her teenage angst always seemed to be a pain the ass. It was becoming obvious that Bella was masochistic. She knew that thoughts of Edward always made her insides hurt and her head take a tailspin, yet, she couldn't stop thinking about the way he would watch her … almost like he was thinking good things about her. People didn't tend to look at Bella that way, and he seemed to do it so often now.

Bella also knew that she was hypocritical. A month ago she had been thinking of different ways to hurt him … she had been referring to him as Douche Master. What ever happened to that guy? He seemed to have completely disappeared from existence … and then she remembered how Edward talked about Dimitri, calling him a loser. That was the Douche Master she knew. And then he would switch it up, turn back into someone else. He had two sides, and Bella was conflicted. She used to want to do terrible things to him, and now those thoughts stirred a feeling deeper than guilt.

Focus.

Right.

That _damn _source fucking analysis.

_What the hell happened during the Tennis Court Oath again?_

She tapped her pencil and bit her lip, staring at the ceiling. Bella couldn't believe that she didn't remember the events of the Tennis Court Oath – the French Revolution was something she was good at. She was about to just give up and search in her textbook when her memory did her a favor. Bella rolled her eyes at herself for forgetting and knew the connection between that event in the past and the political cartoon. All right. So what was her opinion on it?

Bella had a spectacular answer when she heard a whisper. "Isabella!"

Her head snapped up, and was shocked to see Edward in between aisles of books as he walked toward her table.

"What are you doing here? Don't you have class?" She whispered back, taking out her earphones.

"I said I needed to go to the bathroom."

"So you came here instead?"

"Pretty much." Edward was standing opposite of her now, his hands stuffed in his pockets.

Bella quirked her brow. "Aren't you going to get in trouble?"

"Maybe," He shrugged. "It's not really a big deal if I do."

"Right," She grimaced. "The whole bad ass act. I almost forgot that you do that."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Bella shook her head. "Nothing. Just forget I said that."

"I won't," Edward took a seat and leaned his elbows onto the table. "I could tell that you didn't want to talk to me during lunch. Why was that?"

"Like you don't know."

"I don't," He blinked.

"I gave you your lunch this morning and you took it and ran like hell. That conversation with your buddies between third and fourth period? Talking about Dimitri like he's disgusting … do you even know him?" She clicked her tongue and slapped her hands on the table, leaning forward. "You might have sat down with us during lunch, but that doesn't change the fact that you still care about your reputation enough to be an asshole."

"I …"

"Was being nice to me this weekend a lie? Because if it was then I'm sorry I believed it. I really thought you were just misunderstood, and now … now I don't know."

Edward ran a hand threw his hair. "I was actually coming here to apologize to you."

"Oh, really? Well, apology _not _accepted – you're free to go back to your other life." Bella turned her head back to her assignment.

"Look," He said, slowly closing her notebook. "Acting a certain way kind of comes naturally. I don't like it, but it's hard for me to spot since I've been doing it for so long. I guess I've never really seen it as a problem until now."

"Am I supposed to believe this?"

"The way you and Alice were laughing during lunch, not giving a shit about what other people thought. It just made me realize how much work I put into making sure it _looks _like I'm having a good time. And when you caught what I said about Dimitri – the look in your eyes … _God_, I was ashamed. If people look at me that way then what's the point of putting up an act?" He sighed. "Believe what you want, but it's the truth."

"Why do you suddenly care about my perception of you?" Bella asked.

"Because you're the only one who doesn't judge the real me," Edward shrugged. He then looked her in the eye and his tone turned soft. "But, Isabella, this whole weekend – that was the _real _me. When I told you that I care about you, I meant it."

She tried not to smile, because she was still mad at him. "But you were gone before I came downstairs this morning. I mean, calculus tutorial, Edward? Are you that ashamed of me that you don't even want to see me in the morning?"

"Actually, I did need to go to tutorial. I had to ask Mrs. West about one of the problems on the homework she gave us because I couldn't get the right answer," Edward half smirked, making Bella make an 'oh' with her mouth. "I'm not ashamed of you, Isabella. Don't even think that for a second."

"So, what? You're going to try to be less of a douche and more human?" Bella teased.

"Sounds about right," Edward grinned, rising from his seat. "I guess I better get back to class, though. Save me a seat tomorrow at lunch?"

"You're planning to sit with us again?"

"I wasn't lying when I said you guys were fun. And who knows, maybe in time Alice won't want to kill me."

Bella laughed, shaking her head. "Good luck with that."

"I'm going to need it. And, Isabella?"

"Yeah?"

"See you at home," He smiled that imperfect grin, his last words before turning on his heel and walking out of the library.

Bella sat there, wondering what the hell just happened. She put her earphones back in and played Lady GaGa again. She opened her notebook and continued doing her source analysis. Edward was a good actor, but something told her that he wasn't lying when he told her that he was through with his act. Bella was happy to hear this for reasons she wasn't really sure of yet, but at the same time she was also scared – the same reasons were also telling her that she just landed herself in more trouble, which was never good.

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**Bonjour, classe! Sortez s'il vous plaît un stylo et un papier. Aujourd'hui nous écrivons beaucoup de notes. **Good morning, class! Please take out a pen and paper. Today we're writing a lot of notes. **- I'm not fluent in French. I apologize if this is wrong, I don't mean to offend.**

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**I am soooooooooo sorry that I'm updating so freaking late. I actually have a legit reason - school/dance is not involved in this.**

**Okay, so two weeks ago I was dealing with something really personal and I was just crying and crying and was _not _in the right state of mind to write this chapter. Trust me, if I wrote this chapter while I was bawling my eyes out it would have been the most depressing chapter ever. Anyways, I'm better and I had full intentions to have an update ready by last thursday ... then my computer crashed on tuesday. Luckily I was able to transfer most of my files (all of my documents, including this story, was saved. Thank God) onto my new Mac, which I got on Saturday. So yes, I actually had a legit reason. I'm really sorry that you all had to wait two weeks for this update. It broke my heart. Hopefully you understand and find forgiveness in your hearts!**

**Thank you all for your patience, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I know a lot of you wanted to know what would happen when they went back to school :)**

**I love you all and I thank you for reading this story. **

**REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW, AND I'LL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!**

**Much love,**

**Karina.**


	19. Chapter Nineteen: Hectic

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight - but I do own a new case for my phone. It's about time too, because i drop that thing too much.

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_You know those days when you want to just choose_

_To not get out of bed, you're lost in your head again._

_You play the game but you kind of cut_

_'Cause you're coming down hard and your joints are all stuck._

**_Helena Beat - Foster the People_**

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Chapter Nineteen: Hectic

_**Bella**_

_Charles Garland_

_56, 000, 000 results_

"Fucking perfect," Bella muttered, exiting out of the browser.

It was four in the morning and Bella couldn't fall asleep. For hours she had tossed and turned to no avail. She figured that since she couldn't get any shut-eye, she might as well make use of it. Her plan was to search for her real dad, but unfortunately, she came up short. So as she sat in the guest room, her laptop on the desk and eyes tired, Bella felt hopeless. She had no way of finding out who Charles was since she didn't know _anything _about him except for his name. No address, no number, no picture, no _nothing. _

Bella had no idea how she was going to find him … shit just got real.

She groaned and shut her laptop, defeated. Climbing back into her bed and turning off the lamp Bella realized how difficult it was going to be to find Charles. She never really thought of it before, with everything going on, but now that she was safe all she could think of was Charles. Who he was, what he did, why no one ever mentioned him. It was obvious he wanted to see her, because it said multiple times in the letter she wasn't supposed to see, but Bella wondered why Renee and Phil prevented it. Charles was allowed to see her once she turned sixteen, right? That was over a year ago … what were those two trying to hide?

Bella rubbed her eyes and turned on her side, staring at the wall in the dark. It wasn't until she laid her hand on the pillow did she realize that she was crying. She sighed – Bella seemed to cry a lot lately. What made it worse was that most of the time she wasn't even aware of it. How many other things was Bella blind to?

The thought made her bite her lip.

After more tossing around and worrying, Bella was able to sleep for an hour until her alarm went off. She cursed – she could already tell that she would be having more trouble paying attention in biology class than usual. Fucking _great._ She let out a loud yawn and stretched her arms over her head, her body telling her to go back to bed and her mind telling her to get her lazy ass out. Bella could practically feel the dark circles under her eyes.

A pair of jeans and a hoodie was all Bella could manage – Alice would just have to deal. She applied a little makeup and brushed her hair through and called it a day. Even through breakfast all she could think about was how to find Charles. What Charles was doing right now. If Charles was reading the newspaper. What Charles ate for breakfast. If Charles got more sleep than she did, and if he did, he was one lucky bastard.

"You got no sleep either, huh?" Edward said as he sat down across from her, eating his buttered toast.

"I'm about to collapse and it's not even past eight-thirty yet," Bell replied into her cereal, her eyes closed.

A loud clap in her ear jolted her eyes open. "Don't fall asleep on me, Isabella. If I'm going to go to school like a zombie then so are you."

Bella grimaced. "What a speech. You should really consider debate club or something."

"Has anyone ever told you that you're a bitch when you're tired?"

"Has anyone ever told you that you talk too fucking much when _you're _tired?"

"Touché."

Bella flipped Edward off, causing him to chuckle. She was _so _not in the mood for games right now.

"Hurry up and eat," Edward stood up. "We're leaving in fifteen minutes."

"_We_?" Bella repeated, her mouth full with cocoa puffs.

"You don't expect me to let you drive when you're this out of it, do you? You're going to get into a fucking accident."

She wiped her mouth, her brows creasing. "Are you sure you want to risk it?"

"Risk what?" He asked nonchalantly. Bella gave him a 'don't-act-stupid' look and Edward sighed, leaning on the kitchen counter now. "I already told you that I'm done faking my way through life, when will you believe me?"

"Oh, I believe you," She said, walking past him and putting her bowl in the sink. "But the students of Forks' High are vultures. You saw the way everyone was staring at us at lunch, just eating with Alice and I probably tainted your reputation."

"What are you trying to say?"

"All I'm saying is that you don't have to go to such extremes to prove to me, prove to everyone, that you're a different person. You don't have to be seen with me for people to believe that. Just do what feels right for _you_, Edward."

He didn't respond right away, it was just the sound of the tap running that spoke between them. Bella thought she made Edward angry, that she crossed the line. And then she felt him standing right behind her, so close that she could feel the heat radiating off him. Edward's mouth was suddenly by her ear, his breath tickling.

"I'll wait for you in my car, Isabella," he whispered just before retreating, leaving Bella with goose bumps.

**x x x x x x**

It was like the world stopped spinning the minute Bella stepped out of Edward's car. The loud chatter from those in the parking lot had ceased and people stopped walking. She even saw some faces inside, pressed against the windows like they wanted to get a better look. She knew what they were thinking, and she wanted to run. Bella really couldn't handle all these people staring at her, wondering if they were just seeing things or if it was really happening – she asked herself those questions too often. They continued to stare at her as she shut the car door. When she caught up with Edward, Bella noticed that everyone was now gawking at _both of them. _She crossed her arms over her chest like she was protecting herself from them.

However, Edward didn't seem to notice or give a shit. Like yesterday, it was like the staring and questioning expressions didn't faze him. Oh how Bella wished she wasn't so _aware _of the students of Forks' High. But then again Edward had spent most of his high school career walking amongst them like a king, while the same crowd ridiculed Bella.

"Don't worry about them," Edward murmured to her as they walked towards the school. "They're harmless."

"Easy for you to say," Bella said, more bitter than she intended.

She stole a glance at Edward when he didn't respond and immediately regretted it. His brows were creased and his lips were pursed, a give away that he was in deep thought. He wasn't angry, at least he didn't show it on his face, but Bella still felt guilty for a reason she wasn't aware of.

"Hey, Bella," Alice greeted as they pushed through the doors of the school. She then looked at Edward and gave him a look. "Hey, Asshole."

If Edward didn't appreciate Alice's welcome, he didn't show it. He only gave a small smile and a nod of his head. "Alice."

Alice rolled her eyes and turned to Bella. "So I'm guessing that the people didn't react too well when you two arrived together, huh?"

"More like didn't react at all," Bella said. "It should make me feel better, but it doesn't."

Alice waved it off. "Eh, fuck it. The people here really needed to get the sticks out of their asses."

They went to Edward's locker first. Once he opened the metal door the smell of cologne filled her nose and she sneezed. He gave her a sheepish grin and pulled out his books with a shrug. Bella didn't say anything though – it was _Edward's _scent. She couldn't explain why she was so taken by it, but she was. She felt ashamed that the aroma suddenly made her feel something. Not hate. Not friendship. She didn't know what the hell it was, but it was freaking her the fuck out. For real.

After Bella retrieved her things from her own locker, the morning bell rang. She groaned and rubbed her forehead – she wished she brought a pillow or something. At least if she fell asleep then she would have something soft for her head instead of the cold wood of her desk pressed against her cheek. But then again, she couldn't fall asleep in class. Not only would she miss the lesson, but her classmates would take advantage of her unconscious state. Maybe they would draw on her face, or attach sticky notes all over her body. Yeah. Bella couldn't let that shit happen.

As if Alice could sense her distress, she placed a hand on Bella's shoulder. "What's wrong, B?"

"Nothing," Bella said, half lying, "I'm just tired."

"Right," Alice nodded, giving her a 'you're-so-busted-but-I'm-going-to-let-it-slide' look. "I've got to get to the worst subject known to man. Fucking hate that class. But I'll see you in French, 'kay?"

"I'll see ya," Bella waved to Alice as she walked in the other direction. Edward raised his eyebrow and she shrugged. "She really hates chemistry."

"Ah," He nodded in understanding.

The significance of Alice's leaving was only noticeable when Bella realized that she was now standing alone with Edward. He had his backpack slung on one shoulder and a hand stuffed in his pocket. People would pass by, giving the two of them second looks. She almost winced when she heard whispers and gasps. Bella didn't know how Edward was able to handle all of this so well.

"_Oh my _God_! Edward and the freak are hanging out together?"_

"_I guess the rumors are true … who would have thought?"_

"_What's going on with Edward? Yesterday he ate lunch with the duck and now they're driving to school together?"_

"_Do you think they're fucking? That would explain this nonsense …"_

"Hey, Edward," a voice emerged from the crowd. Both of them turned around, and Bella could have sworn she saw Edward stiffen. It was a weird sight – Bella thought Rosalie and Edward were best friends. Wasn't he supposed to feel comfortable around her the most? "Missed you at lunch yesterday. Why didn't you answer your phone last night?"

Edward shifted onto his heels. "I was busy."

"I'm sure," Rosalie gave Bella a once over with a click of her tongue. She then turned to Edward with a sweet smile and hopeful eyes. "Are you eating with us today?"

_God, she was fake as hell._

"I don't think so, Rosalie," Edward replied monotonously before turning to Bella with a strained smile. "I'll see you, Isabella."

Edward didn't acknowledge Rosalie as he walked passed her with a hand running through his hair. Bella had a feeling that Rosalie still didn't know that she had been exposed, which made this even more awkward.

Rosalie watched as Edward retreated until he wasn't anywhere to be seen. She then whipped her head at Bella, not saying anything, just glaring at her. However, that look alone said many things – many _scary_ things. It was almost like Rosalie was giving Bella a warning. Of what, she wasn't sure. Ands as if sensing how uneasy Bella was, Rosalie threw her blonde hair over he shoulder and strutted away. She had never received such a look from someone at school before, but the expression Rosalie held reminded her too much of Phil.

And for the first time since Phil and Renee left, Bella didn't feel safe.

**x x x x x x**

Alice and Bella pushed through the cafeteria doors in high spirits – well, not really. They were just relieved that French class was over with for the day. Alice was making an impression, a very bad one, of Mr. Cormier when she stopped mid sentence and halted.

"What in the actual _fuck_?" She shrieked. "Is it opposite day or something?"

Alice's gaze was focused on something, never moving, so Bella tried finding what she was so appalled by. She scanned the whole cafeteria – nothing seemed out of place. Everyone was in their own tables with their own groups of friends. She passed the center of the room once more and noticed that there were two people missing from _the _table. Rosalie was glaring and shaking her head towards the far corner of the room, muttering something that Bella could not decipher. She was only aware of one person who wasn't sitting that that able, and it was Edward. There was only one other reason why Rosalie would be so pissed and Bella couldn't believe it.

"Emmett!" Alice said as they approached their usual table. "Why are you sitting here?"

Edward and Emmett stopped joking around and looked up at the two of them. Edward gave Bella an easy grin, seeming in a better mood than when she last saw him this morning. Emmett offered Bella a polite smile before turning back to Alice. Bella just stood there, wide-eyed. She didn't know what to do in this situation.

"Am I not allowed to sit here, little sis?" Emmett asked.

"No, you're not. Now leave."

"This is a free country, Al. I can sit here if I want. Besides, aren't you the one who kept on telling me to give Bella a chance?" He winked at Bella, and if it was possible, it caused her eyes to grow wider. Now she _really _didn't know what to do. This was just too much.

Alice glared at her brother. "I did … before you started being a douche bag and stopped talking to me. But I blame your bitch of a girlfriend for that."

"Hey, I'm here now aren't I? And we're talking. This is an improvement," Alice scoffed and rolled her eyes at this. "Now sit. I'd like to have lunch with my sister, my good friend, and all the while get to know Bella."

_What the fuck was going on?_

Bella sat down before Alice. She watched as her friend and her brother stared at each other, like they were arguing with just their eyes. Alice's eyes were narrowed while Emmett's was amused and pleading at the same time. However, Alice eventually gave in and seated herself, slamming her lunch on the table and crossing her arms and legs, biting the inside of her cheek. Bella wasn't aware that Alice and Emmett had stopped talking, she wondered why that was.

Apparently Edward was thinking the same thing, because they looked at each other at that moment and he merely shrugged. For a little while, they just gazed at each other. Nothing dramatic, nothing subtle. She didn't know what Edward saw when he looked at her or what he was thinking, but Bella was noticing how Edward's eye color seemed to change when he was tired. Above the hint of dark circles beneath his eyes was a deeper shade of green, a forest green, with no flecks of gold in sight.

Eventually they both looked away, and Bella cleared her throat. Emmett had witnessed the whole thing, his eyes wondering back and forth between her and Edward. He held no expression but Bella had a feeling that just like his sister, he was able to come to a conclusion with the littlest of things. That made her nervous, because now she wondered how she and Edward looked like to other people. She wasn't really sure what was going on between the two of them herself.

What was worse was that more people were watching their table. As if yesterday and this morning wasn't enough. Bella could feel their stares boring into the back of her head, could practically hear what all of them were thinking. This frightened her – she wasn't used to this kind of attention. Alice, Edward and Emmett went on like nothing was occurring, but Bella had to remember that they were – or are, in Emmett and Edward's case – popular and were used to being constantly looked at and gossiped about. Bella wondered what it was like, to be admired like that.

She would never know, however, since the people here were assholes.

"You're an idiot," Alice shook her head, pointing her fork at Emmett. "Of course Mom figured out you had a party. You forgot to hide the extra booze you had."

"Well you didn't help clean up," Emmett argued.

"It wasn't my party to clean."

"You could have gone, Al. It was a pretty good time, right, Ed?" He nudged Edward.

"Right," Edward nodded his head. "It was great."

He was lying.

Bella wasn't sure how she knew that, but she did. It was the way Edward's eyes immediately cast down as he agreed with Emmett, how monotonous his voice sounded. She shouldn't care, she _knew_ she shouldn't be giving a shit, but she wondered what really happened at Emmett's party. What happened that made Edward lie to Emmett about having a good time when it was evident that he didn't. She _really _shouldn't care about that. However, Bella's curiosity always got the better of her.

"I guess Rosalie wasn't happy about you sitting here," Edward said.

"She flipped me off and walked away. You should have seen her yesterday though, dude. She was fucking psycho, wondering why you were sitting here and not with us. I thought she was going to have a heart attack or something."

"Why?"

"Fuck, if I know. You guys are best friends, right? Maybe she just feels betrayed," Both Alice and Edward scoffed at the same time, causing Emmett to look between the two of them. "What am I missing?"

Edward shook his head. "Don't worry about it, Em."

"Yeah," Alice agreed. "Just remember that your girlfriend is a manipulating bitch who needs to shut her mouth, okay?"

"Um, all right," Emmett said uneasily.

Without meaning to say anything, Bella blurted, "Could you possibly tell her to stop glaring at me? It's freaking me out and I'm pretty sure if she keeps it up she's going to look that way for-fucking-ever."

Bella covered her mouth with wide eyes. She could not believe she had said that out loud!

She was going to apologize when Emmett hung his head back and let out the loudest laugh she ever heard. "I think I like you, Bella."

Alice slapped his chest. "I fucking told you! God, you're such an asshole, Emmett."

Emmett rolled his eyes in response.

When the bell rang, all four of them got up. Alice and Emmett seemed to have resolved whatever problem they had and were joking around. Just before Emmett went his way, he hugged Alice and bumped fists with Edward. Then he did something that Bella wasn't expecting – he patted her shoulder and winked. Bella didn't know what was going on. Was Emmett suddenly going to be her friend? She never had so many friends before. And if he did, what were his intentions? Were they good or were they for Rosalie's needs? No matter though, she was still stunned that Emmett had suddenly changed his demeanor towards Bella within half an hour.

What was happening?

"Ready for class?" Edward asked when Alice went on her way towards another hallway.

Right, today was creative writing.

"I actually have to get my stuff first …"

"Sure. I'll come with you."

_Well, okay then. _

There was no use thinking that people would stop watching the two of them, so Bella decided to just ignore it. Or at least act like it wasn't bothering her. It was better than showing them that all this attention was intimidating. Bella wasn't fond of the newfound attention, but she was tired of being looked down upon. She was pulling out her binder from the top shelf when Ben Cheney bumped her shoulder, causing her to drop her books.

"Damn it," Bella muttered, beginning to crouch down to retrieve her things.

"I'm so sorry!" Ben exclaimed.

Her head shot up. "Huh?"

No one had ever apologized for bumping into Bella before.

"I didn't mean it. Eric pushed me and …" He scratched the back of his head with contrite eyes. "Here, let me get those for you."

"Um," Bella watched with a confused expression as Ben, a senior who was never shy of making fun of her before, bent down to pick up her books. He handed them to her in a neat pile. "I … uh … I guess … thank you?"

"No problem, Isabella," Ben said, backing away with his hands in his pockets. She didn't miss the quick glance he gave Edward before turning on his heel and disappearing from her sight.

Then she realized something – Ben had called her by her name. Not 'Duck' or 'Freak' … but byher _real name. _She didn't know that people outside the Cullen's and Alice – and Emmett, though he is related to Alice – knew what her real name was.

"Why is Ben Cheney so nice to me all of a sudden? And how does he know my name?" Bella asked.

"No clue," Edward shrugged easily. His tone was _too _nonchalant – what did Edward know? "Has anyone bothered you today?"

"Besides Rosalie and the constant gawking?" Bella thought about it, tapping her chin. She was shocked with her conclusion – she couldn't believe she didn't notice it earlier. "You know what, now that I think about, _no._"

Edward seemed pleased with her answer. "Good. That's good."

Okay, he _definitely _knew something.

"What did you do?"

"Me? Nothing at all."

Bella faced him. "Edward …"

"Isabella," He said in the same tone. "Seriously, don't even worry about it."

She realized she wasn't going to win, so she sighed. "Okay. Just promise me that you won't do anything to get yourself in trouble for my sake. I'm nothing special."

Edward stopped walking, causing Bella to do the same. "How many times do I have to tell you to stop putting yourself down like that, Isabella? You're …"

Bella's phone rang. She pulled it out of her pocket, seeing an unknown number on caller ID.

"I should probably get this," she said. "Can you tell Mrs. Anderson that I'll be a little late?"

In truth, she wanted to know what Edward was about to say before her cell interrupted him, but she also didn't. He nodded and gulped at the same time. "Yeah, I'll tell her."

And he walked away.

Bella didn't know what to make of the sudden turn of events. She didn't know if Edward as angry or frustrated, or whatever he was feeling. She didn't know why he suddenly cared about what she thought of herself. He certainly never really gave a shit before. Besides, putting herself down had become second nature to Bella. It was awful, but she couldn't help it. That was the downside of living hell at both school and home for so many years.

She tapped the button and put the phone by her ear. "Hello?"

"Is this Isabella Swan?" a mature, male voice asked.

"Yeah, who is this?"

There was rustling of papers in the background. "Isabella, it's Detective Newton. I have some good news and some bad news."

Bella didn't know what to make of that statement. "Is everything all right?"

"Yes and no," He replied, making Bella feel a little uneasy. "We've tracked Phil just outside of Vancouver. This is where the bad news kicks in.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, we were able to track him and flew over there as fast as we could. However, when we traced back to his motel he was already gone. It was like he knew we found him."

"So what you're saying is …"

Detective Newton sighed. "What I'm saying is that we lost him, both him and Renee. We're going to have to start from scratch. I'm sorry."

"It's fine. Thanks for letting me know, Detective Newton," Bella responded quietly before shutting off her phone.

She was definitely feeling anything _but _fine.

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**I guess I should start this A/N with a huge ass apology/explanation ... here we go:**

**Okay, first of all I'm sorry that this took me almost a month to update. I want to let you all know that I have not abandoned it, because some of you messaged me and made sure I wasn't. Don't worry - I would _never _leave this story without it being rightly concluded. I've just been super busy this month. Grade 12 is so important because of diplomas and such and it's a little crazy. I've had homework every night, and it's not light homework. It's the 'you have an exam tomorrow' or 'a project due' or 'i'm checking to make sure this is done. it's for marks and it has to be correct,' stuff. Add my dance schedule and you have me coming home at 10 pm and finishing my homework at 2 am. Thursday night was the first time on a weekday that I was able to get more than four hours of sleep, and that was because I didn't have school on Friday. It was glorious.**

**I don't like have more than a week before updates, but unfortunately I didn't have any control over my time schedule. Just know that I am trying my best to update as quickly as possible. Hopefully October is good to me and school isn't such a bitch.**

**Once again, I am so sooooooooooooo SO sorry that it took me so long to update. I love you all and I thank you for staying with me even though this chapter almost took me a month to put up. I promise, or will try, not to take so long.**

**Okay, with that out of the way ... What did you think of this chapter? Sorry for the cliffhanger-ish ending. I seem to do that a lot haha. On the bright side? Edward POV is next chapter. Yessir :)**

**I'm going to be applying to universities this month ... I'm a little scared. Pray that I get accepted, please? :)**

**That is all I have to say. I love you and I hope you don't hate me.**

**DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW!**

**See you all next time!**

**Karina. **


	20. Chapter Twenty: Confrontation

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I own both Michael Buble & Justin Bieber's Christmas albums. Both are really good - I recommend them if you're as excited about Christmas as I am :)

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_And how dare that you send me that card,_

_When I'm doing all that I can do._

_You are forcing me to remember,_

_When all I want is to just forget you._

**_Elephants - Rachael Yamagata _**

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Chapter Twenty: Confrontation

_**Edward**_

It happened a lot lately. The dreams. Edward had tried so damn hard to convince himself that he couldn't remember anything from that night, and then almost as easy as a snap of his fingers, those memories brushed through his unconscious.

It would start with one drink. Then two. Then three. Then six. After that he suspected he did a couple of shots – Edward wasn't too sure. He just knew that he drank _a lot _that night. For a little while, things were blurry. He didn't know what he said, though he was sure whatever came out of his mouth was quite embarrassing, and he definitely didn't know how he ended up in Eric Yorkie's guest bedroom with _her_.

By the time she pressed his lips to his and began to unbuckle his belt, Edward was more aware. Still disoriented, but considerably sober. The reasonable side of him was starting to kick in, telling him that he should stop. That it was wrong. He was a virgin and he wanted to have sex with someone he was in love with. However, his drunken mind was dominant and telling Edward that she was beautiful and that he should just go ahead.

Edward would wake up once they began to lie down in bed. He would always wake up at that exact moment. He didn't need to dream of the rest, he already knew what happened next. If there was one thing that Edward believed of Rose, it was what happened that night. Due to recent events, he only knew what held true because of his dreams. Yes, his first time was with a beautiful girl who had more experience than he did, but it still felt so _wrong. _Rose had woken him up the next morning with a shake of his shoulder, and sure enough, the space beside him was empty and cold.

Edward would always regret that night.

He tried not to sleep too much. Edward didn't know why the dreams were suddenly coming back. He had been rid of those memories for _months, _why was he suddenly unwillingly reminiscing in his sleep? It made Edward pull his hair and rub his eyes too many times. He didn't like waking up with clammy hands and cold sweat. Most guys would have had a hard-on from that kind of dream … but Edward did not. Not because he wasn't attracted to women, because he most definitely was, but because the girl that appeared in his dream was just _wrong. _What made it even more confusing was that the back of his mind was wishing that a different girl were in that dream instead … the girl sleeping right in the other room.

Fuck, if Edward knew why he would suddenly wish that Isabella was the one moaning his name and digging her nails into his back. It made no sense! They were just friends, right? Well, he thought they were friends. Well shit. Even Edward wasn't sure what they were. So how in the actual fuck was he supposed to know what his subconscious was trying to tell him?

Or did he already know, and just didn't want to believe it?

But wait … what did he not believe?

Edward decided to stay awake until his alarm went off. He was lying on his bed, his blankets covering the lower half of his body, and he stared at the ceiling. Just thinking. Just trying to forget about that god-forsaken dream. Maybe he was suddenly dreaming about that night because he realized that Rose was a liar, and that the only thing he was sure she was telling the truth about was what had happened.

Yeah, trying to forget about all that shit really was just _not _working at the moment.

Rustling from the other side of the wall distracted him from his thoughts. Isabella was awake again. Edward wondered what was keeping her up at night, wondering why she was always tapping on her keyboard. He could hear the clicking and the frustrated sighs. She was obviously stressed, and though she had a million reasons to feel so, Edward wanted to know what was stressing her at this very moment.

Isabella was obviously tired yesterday, and Edward knew that it was because she was up last night as well. As much as he wanted to get out of bed and walk into her room, he gripped his sheets and forced himself to stay put. He was too involved already – he was getting too attached. He wasn't ready to walk into that … and what _that _was he wasn't really sure. Edward wasn't ready, that was what he knew.

"Fuck this," Edward groaned. He rose out of bed and swung his legs over the edge. He lightly leaped off and landed on the cold floor. With only fifteen minutes before his alarm went off, Edward decided to take a short shower. He slowly walked to the bathroom across the hall. Once inside he immediately turned on the water.

The spray of the hot water usually washed away most of the memories he had revisited, but lately it seemed that less and less were relieved as his dreams continued. It was so fucking annoying. He rubbed his hand over his face, spitting out some water that had escaped into his mouth. He could still feel her nails scrape against his skin, her teeth nibbling on his ear. It was too much, this regret. Edward fought from punching the wall, mostly because he didn't want to concern anyone if he woke them up. But if he were home alone, Edward would have done so. He would have pounded the wall until it crumbled to the ground.

Edward shut off the water and wrapped a towel around his waist. Rubbing his palm against the mirror of condensation, he began to brush his teeth. His wet hair was dripping water into his face, shoulders, and chest. He really needed a fucking haircut, but lately it seemed that he never had the time to get one. It was almost like his life had stopped motion, but at the same it seemed like it was going by too fast. Edward had to constantly keep reminding himself that he was still walking on the ground, because sometimes he felt that he was airborne, just going through the motions yet concentrating on not descending.

All these paradoxes were fucking with his head. He needed to stop thinking so much in the morning. It probably wasn't healthy. Hell, it _wasn't _healthy. He hadn't even had breakfast yet and already he felt like he was going to vomit. Edward rolled his eyes at himself as he wiped his mouth. He gave himself one last glance in the mirror before deciding that he looked just as stressed as he felt, and stepped out of the bathroom. It was fucking cold as he tip toed to his room, and he was careful not to wake anyone. It was so cold that Edward half-ran to his room, excited to put on some clothes.

Imagine his surprise when he shut the door behind him and heard a gasp. Edward whipped around and clutched the towel, making sure it didn't lose its hold.

"I-I'm _so _sorry," Isabella stuttered. "I didn't mean to intrude, but your alarm was going off for like ten minutes and I just went to turn it off…"

Edward chuckled. "It's fine, Isabella."

"… If I had known you were indecent I wouldn't have come in. I'm not perverted. It's just that your alarm was _so damn loud _and – "

"Isabella," Edward said, causing her to press her lips together. Edward tried not to stare at how full they seemed to look. "Don't stress … It's cool."

"Oh, okay," Isabella nodded, the bun on top of her head releasing wisps of her brown hair. Her eyes glanced slightly sown before quickly meeting his face. Edward couldn't ignore the fact that she was blushing. "I guess I'll um, you know, let you get changed."

Before Edward had the chance to reply, Isabella walked passed him with her eyes trained to the floor. She had been so talkative not too long ago, trying to explain herself to him even though she didn't need to explain at all. He had a feeling that if Isabella had come into his room just to see him half naked he wouldn't have cared. God. That sounded _so _fucking bad. What was with him? What was with _her_? It was like someone flipped a switch and she suddenly became shy. Her red cheeks always indicated that she was embarrassed about something, but what could it have been? It couldn't have been the fact that he was only wearing a towel – he walked around the house in only his pajama pants and she didn't seem to give a shit. Did she? Did Edward even care if she did?

Yes, of course he did. That was such a stupid ass question. Edward didn't want to make Isabella nervous or uncomfortable in any way. He walked to his closet and rubbed his eyes – he was already stressed and the day had hardly begun. Edward wasn't used to thinking this much before. He never really gave a shit about his feelings or how he thought of certain things. For so long it was just go to school, act like a popular son of a bitch, act stupid, go home, do homework so he didn't get grades like a stupid person, and play piano privately in his music room. It had been his routine, his straightforward routine that didn't fuck with his head. Now … now everything was jumbled up and it actually felt relieving but not, at the same time. For once, people could actually see that Edward was smart and wasn't a _complete_ douche bag. Yet people now wondered what made Edward 'change' and how Isabella fit into the equation.

How _did _Isabella fit into the equation?

The personal, metaphorical equation of course. It was obvious how she fit into the situational equation that brought Edward into this distress.

A black shirt, a pair of jeans, a spray of cologne, a hand through his hair, and Edward was done. God, he was thankful that he was guy. He could hear Isabella rustling around in her bedroom mumbling 'too boring,' or 'too fancy,' every minute or so. Once and a while she would say 'too fucking pretty,' before rummaging around again. Edward wondered what she meant by that. He wanted to ask Isabella about it, but he didn't want to seem like the asshole that eavesdropped through the wall, even though he kind of was.

He shrugged it off and grabbed his backpack and iPhone. Edward slid his finger on the screen to unlock it as he descended the stairs. There was a text message from Emmett that was received at two in the morning. Who the fuck stayed up that late on a school night?

Oh right … Edward did.

_Dude, Rose is fucking pissed. Can't sit with you at lunch today …_

The hell?

_Pissed at you or pissed at me?_

_At everything, bro. She yelled at Lauren yesterday because her shoes were the same color as her shirt. I'm telling ya, I saw Lauren's shoes fly high into the trees._

_That's kind of funny …_

_I know! But seriously, I can't risk my life. If I were you, I would do the same thing and split._

Edward dropped his backpack by the kitchen counter and ran a hand through his damp hair. He began typing his reply with a heavy sigh and a bit of disappointment.

_I think I can handle it, Em. I'll see you at school._

Rose was getting worse – he had noticed it ever since he began sitting with Isabella and Alice at lunch. Her mood and actions gradually became angrier when Edward drove Isabella to school and Emmett sat with them. And even though he didn't like Lauren, he still felt bad that Rose's rage was randomly dawned on the gossip-talking girl. Edward couldn't really blame Emmett for bailing either, because he knew that when Rose got mad, she got fucking scary. Still, he couldn't help but feel let down that Emmett, another person from his old group, was willingly getting to know the real Edward and hoped that Emmett wouldn't completely forget about him. If anything, he needed someone from that world to hold onto – a little sense of familiarity so he didn't get completely lost in the unknown.

Transitioning from one end of the spectrum to the other was a lot harder than Edward anticipated. And even though what Isabella had said in the library the other day made him see what he was doing was wrong, and that who he was trying to be was worse, it was still difficult to get rid of old habits. He found himself _almost_ joining in with the seniors who were mocking the freshmen. _Almost _agreeing with the guys when they rated chicks. He stopped himself from lying to Alec about what he got on the physics exam. The last time Alec asked him was at Emmett's party. This time, when Edward had told him that he almost got every answer right Alec almost didn't believe it. Though when Edward showed him his exam, Alec guessed that Edward knew what he was doing all along. Edward nodded and Alec shrugged, joking about how Edward should tutor him before finals.

However, Alec was one of the few amongst his group that didn't seem to mind that Edward was hanging out with Isabella. Jane and Kate felt bad that Edward was eating at a different table, but said that they just wanted him to be happy and that they hoped that Edward would still be friends with them. Laurent, however, was not subtle on the fact that he felt betrayed by Edward's actions. Edward didn't do anything in response, however, because he hoped that Laurent would one day calm down and start talking to Edward again. Rose was obviously beyond pissed and Emmett was cool with whatever was going on.

The rest of the school was … creepy. Edward knew that the student body looked up to him, but he didn't realize the extent until yesterday. It was evident when Isabella wasn't getting picked on, and that made him uneasy. Like fuck, he didn't know the effect he had on those people. He didn't mean for every one of them to follow his footsteps and bully Isabella. He only did that because she hurt Rose, which wasn't true. That made Edward even more uneasy. He was happy that people were beginning to stop calling Isabella names and making fun of her behind her back, but shit. If he didn't sit with her at lunch on Monday then everyone would still be mocking her. Edward had power, and he needed to learn how to fucking use it.

"My car?" Isabella's voice cut into his thoughts.

"Huh?"

She rolled her eyes with a small smile. "You wanna use my car today since you drove yesterday?"

"Um," Edward's brow creased.

"I mean we don't have to go together if you don't want to. I just thought that it would make sense since we're both here."

Edward couldn't help but chuckle – she always ranted when she tried to justify herself. "Of course we're going together, but I don't mind driving again."

"You look like you didn't get enough sleep, though."

"So?" He asked. What did that have to do with anything? She was up all night too, though she probably got more sleep than he did.

"You don't expect me to let you drive when you're this out of it, do you? You're going to get into a fucking accident," She accused, her tone playful.

It didn't take him long to realize that she had used the exact same words he had told her yesterday in order to get her to ride with him. Fucking touché. Yet, why did he find that so adorable? "Fine. But I get to drive it coming back."

"No way!" She said.

"How come?"

"Would you let me drive your BMW?" When he didn't reply she laughed. "Exactly."

Edward groaned. "I'm a fucking good driver."

"So am I," Isabella retorted. She grabbed an apple and pulled on his sleeve. "Now let's go. I have to pick up Alice, too."

"Why didn't Emmett drive her? I thought they were okay now," Edward said, picking his backpack up from the floor.

"Alice said he had to pick up Rosalie and she didn't want to have to sit with the devil's spawn. Her words, not mine," Isabella explained, before sighing. "Sorry, I shouldn't have told you that. I know that Rosalie is your best friend."

He shrugged, because he didn't know what Rosalie meant to him anymore. He was hurt and betrayed, and just kind of done with it all. Isabella seemed to know what Edward was thinking because she gently squeezed his arm. It was a simple gesture, but it was like she understood what he was feeling. What Edward used to know didn't seem real anymore, and it was like Isabella got that. When she pulled her hand away, Edward had to fight himself from stopping her. It was strange.

They were about to head for the door when Edward sighed. "I forgot something. Why don't you wait for me in your car?"

"Okay," Isabella nodded. "Don't take too long, though."

"I won't."

Once Isabella was out the door, Edward turned on his heel and made his way toward the kitchen. He rounded the counter and stopped when he was facing the cabinet. He opened it and pulled out the black kit that he was so familiar with. Edward seemed to forget his responsibilities when he was around Isabella. This particular responsibility was something he could not keep forgetting though, or else one day it will completely slip his mind and his subconscious won't remind him. It would be very dangerous if that happened.

There were three loud honks as Edward began finishing up with the black kit. "Hurry the hell up, Edward!"

He chortled and yelled back, "I'm coming!"

Quickly, he closed the cabinet with the black kit inside and ran out the house. Isabella scolded him when he got inside her car, but he shrugged. Edward knew she wasn't mad, because the minute she pulled out of the driveway she was laughing about how eventful their day has been and it hadn't even started yet. He laughed with her, because it was true.

Hopefully that meant that rest of the day would go smoother.

**x x x x x x**

Edward didn't miss the judging stares that targeted him and Isabella once they got to school. It would take a while for the entire student body to come to terms with the change of social structure. He was a fucking good actor, he could hide from Isabella that he was feeling uneasy. With everyone watching him and wondering what the fuck was going on, Edward was tempted to make it all seem like a joke and go back to his old life. However, he knew that if he did that he wouldn't be able to live with himself. He had already accepted that he didn't _truly _belong with that crowd, no matter how hard he tried to make himself believe. It would be difficult to convince himself that he was wrong, because he knew he wasn't. Edward couldn't shake the feeling of nervousness though – he didn't know what to expect. Everything was so unfamiliar now.

He felt guilty that he was thinking that way, because he told Isabella that he was tired of pretending and was worthy of being her friend. Nothing would ever stop the remorse of all the shit he did to her, but he was hoping that showing her that he was different would be a good start. The truth was that the speech she gave the day they were grounded, and had that asshole of a hangover, was something he could never get out of his head. She had been right – he didn't want to audition because he was worried about his cred. No one cool ever try out for school plays. God, that shit was for pussies. And then Isabella told him off the next day about being two different people. Worst of all, she thought that Edward had been playing a part that weekend. She couldn't have been farther from the truth.

It wasn't even _just _that weekend, either. Edward had slowly been coming out of his douche bag cave for a while now. It was only that weekend when something just clicked. Like he didn't have any more boundaries around her, yet so many. He felt more real when he was around Isabella, and he couldn't let her keep believing that he was acting around her.

Yes, her speeches fucking moved him. Edward wasn't going to lie about it. That was why he was going to try out for the play later in the afternoon. He had liked the script, and even thought about being in it as he read it. Of course his old self told him to stop thinking that way and chuck the production away. Well, Edward was able to fuck over his prior thoughts and do what he wanted to do. Or at least, what he _thought _he wanted to do. He made himself a compromise. He wasn't going to try out for the male lead, because that would just completely ruin the reputation he had built up. Well trying out for this play could also do that, but so could hanging out with Isabella …

No, Edward couldn't think like that. He was going to try out for the role of the best friend and that was it. It was a minor role, but hey, at least it was something. Edward was excited to try out, and Mrs. McGrath would finally get her way.

Was that convincing enough?

"What did you get for number eight?"

Edward blinked out of his daze and glanced to his left. Alec was tapping his pencil on his textbook and watched Edward expectantly.

"What?" Edward asked.

Alec rolled his eyes. "Dude, we're working on page two-hundred-thirty-two, numbers one to twenty. Wake the hell up."

"I'm awake," Edward defended. He opened his textbook and looked at the question. He would have known the answer if he wasn't so distracted. Thoughts of his own conflicts made him forget the formula to get the correct answer. "Um, I'm not on that question."

"Whatever, man," Alec chuckled, turning back to his work. Edward scratched his ear and decided he should probably start doing something before Mr. Barnes kicked his ass. However, before he got a chance to read the first question, Alec cleared his throat. "So is she like, a good lay or something?"

"Who are you talking about?" God, did this school ever stop with the gossip? Edward wondered who he was supposedly fucking now.

"Who else? The Swan girl."

"The fuck? No! I don't mean she's not a good lay. And what I mean by that is that I wouldn't know because I haven't … we haven't …" Edward sighed, trying to calm down. "Nothing has happened. We're just friends."

Almost like he was making sure that Edward wasn't lying, Alec searched his expression. He eventually nodded. "Okay, man, I believe you. But I don't get it. All you've ever done before was make fun of that girl. And now you're hanging out with her? It doesn't make sense."

Edward shrugged. "To be honest, Alec, it doesn't really make sense to me either. I guess I just didn't really know her before. And now that I do …"

"Holy son of a fuck," Alec whispered. "You like her."

"Well, no shit. I already told you we're friends."

"Don't be so dense, asshole. You _like_ her. You have the hots for the Duck."

"Do _not _call her that."

"Sorry, force of habit," Alec said with a shy smile. "I guess I better get used to saying her real name."

"Fuck yeah, you should," Edward scolded. He looked around the room to see if anyone was listening to their conversation before leaning in. "I do not like Isabella that way. I don't know where you're getting that from."

"Whatever, Edward. Just remember that no matter what, there _are _still people in our group that will stick with you. Okay?"

Edward didn't have anything else to say after that, so he nodded. It wasn't because he was shocked that Alec thought that he and Isabella had been sexual with each other, because he had a feeling that people would assume so. It was that he was so sure that Edward had feelings for Isabella. Not friendly feelings, but romantic feelings. It was true that lately Edward caught himself appreciating how she acted and looked, but surely that didn't mean he _liked _her. He was a guy, after all. Guys thought of shit like that all the time.

Was that convincing enough?

God, Edward _so _didn't need this shit … it was so fucking inconvenient.

He didn't even bother attempting his work – he knew he couldn't concentrate now. So instead Edward drew random lines all over his page to make it seem like he was doing something. All the while he was thinking of everything, and everything in between that.

Once the bell rang, the day seemed to go by faster. Edward wasn't really sure what happened during his classes because all he did was draw those stupid ass lines on his paper since he had so much on his mind. Eventually the jumble of thoughts turned into just one: Isabella. What Alec said really stuck in Edward's thoughts and it wad freaking him out. He didn't really notice it before, but now he was wondering if all those times that Edward couldn't figure out that light feeling in his chest or lingering energy on his skin whenever he was around Isabella was because he started to feel something for her. But then Edward would contradict that thought with something logical like maybe he was feeling that way because he had never been so true to himself around someone before. Then Edward would argue that idea and think that maybe he does like Isabella … and the cycle would start all over again.

By the time last period ended, Edward was a wreck. His mind was exhausted from the failure that was his self-discovery. And shit, he still had to try out for the play. He was putting the lock on his locker when he caught a whiff of a familiar, pleasant scent.

"Ready to go?" Isabella asked.

Edward ran a hand through his hair – he didn't tell Isabella about the play. "I actually forgot to tell you, but I'm going to go audition."

She seemed shocked by that, her brown eyes widening and her full lips parting. "For the play? Really?"

"Is it that shocking?"

"Yeah, it is," She laughed. "Do you want me to come with you?"

"You don't have to do that, Isabella. I'll find a way home after the audition."

"Don't be ridiculous, I don't mind waiting. Besides, I actually want to see if you'll pull through."

"Your faith in me is just too much," He chuckled. "Let's go. I think it starts in ten minutes."

Isabella and Edward walked in silence, but he felt like that they were having a mental conversation. At one point they would laugh for no reason, just because. Then they would look at each other and glance away just as quickly. It was comfortable and peaceful – it was what he needed to calm himself the fuck down.

Just as they approached the doors to the school theatre, he heard heels click against the floor. Edward turned his head and sighed – it was Rose, and she looked somewhat pissed and somewhat sympathetic.

"Can we talk?" She asked him.

_Better get this shit over with, _Edward thought, _you can't keep running away from it._

"Isabella, why don't you go inside? I'll be there in a few," Edward told her.

She glanced at Rose before nodding her head. "I'll go find us a seat."

Once Isabella was inside, Edward felt like he was truly alone. He never used to feel this way with Rose – she used to be the person he was most comfortable with. Edward couldn't see her in that light anymore. She was different to him now. "What do you want to talk about?"

Completely avoiding the question, Rose pointed to the theatre doors. "Really, Edward? The school play? Are you trying to commit social suicide?"

"The script is pretty good," Edward shrugged. "And what I do shouldn't be any of your business."

"I'm your best friend. I'm just looking out for you."

Edward scoffed. "See I don't think you are, because if you were my best friend you wouldn't have lied to me."

Rose threw her hand in the air. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't you remember, Rosalie? Three years ago, you came to my house crying because Isabella had taken Tyler from you. You were my best friend, so I believed you. If you're still my friend, you will tell me the truth."

"I did," Rose said. "Three fucking years ago."

"Just cut the bullshit, I know you lied about that. All I want to know is _why._"

Rose shook her head. "I can't believe this. You believe Daisy Duck, over me? After everything we have been through together."

"Yes, I do believe her. You lied to me, you lied to Emmett … you're lying right now because you know you just got caught. Who else have you lied to? Huh? How many other victims are there?"

As if something inside her clicked, tears started falling down her cheeks. "Edward, I swear that I have a good reason for what I did."

"You _used _me! Your lie made me treat Isabella like trash and that influenced everyone else to do the same thing. What did she ever do to you?"

"Just listen to me. I have an explanation for what I did …"

"You know what, Rosalie? I don't even want to hear it."

"No, no. Please just let me explain. I can't lose you, Edward. You're my best friend," Rosalie begged, stepping closer. Her makeup was starting to smear now, but somehow, it didn't seem to make him feel any pity.

"From now on, just stay away from me," Edward said, his voice steady and his eyes staring straight into hers. He couldn't stand to associate with someone like that. Now Edward could only see Rosalie the same way he saw Angela Webber –fake, and not worth it.

Edward left Rosalie standing there, not bothering to look back. He didn't regret what he said, but he couldn't help but feel bad that he had just told Rosalie to keep out of his sight. She was a big part of his life, but he was too betrayed. This was her fault, not his. Even after Edward exposed her, she wouldn't tell the truth on her own terms. She was only going to tell him because she knew she was in trouble. Edward was hoping that Rose would at least apologize. Nothing. He couldn't be more disappointed in her than he was right now.

"You okay?" Isabella's voice broke through his reverie.

Edward gave her a small smile. Even in the dim light, she looked beautiful. "I'll be fine. It's just hard."

"I can imagine," she said. "But I'm here if you need me, okay? Now go get that part – I think you're next."

Sure enough, his name was called. "Wish me luck."

"I'm so proud of you, Edward." Isabella took his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Good luck."

When she released his hand, Edward couldn't help but feel a little cold. Thoughts of Rose and their confrontation slowly slipped away from his mind and thoughts of Isabella made their way in. He looked back to her one last time and she gave him a reassuring grin. God, she was gorgeous.

And that's when he knew it.

Alec was right, and Edward was a fucking idiot for not realizing what he was feeling all this time.

Well, shit.

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**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

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**I'm really sorry for the incredibly late update. Grade 12 is stressing me out and this is seriously the first night in like a month and a half that I had absolutely no homework. Trust me, I'd rather be writing this story than doing conics in math. However, you guys have been incredibly patient and for that I thank you. You guys message me telling me to take my time and not stress myself out, which only proves that I have the best readers in the world. Your support and patience is beautiful!**

**So some realizations for Edward in this chapter, do you like? If you are wondering if this is the big scene with Edward and Rosalie, the answer is no. There's another one and I promise you it is worth while! Speaking of worth while, the next chapter is something I'm really excited for. I think you guys will appreciate it. Hopefully I can get it out soon.**

**I love you all and I will be forever grateful for your patience. Virtual cookies for all of you!**

**Until next time. And don't forget to REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW.**

**Much Love,**

**Karina.**


	21. Chapter TwentyOne: Need

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own an obsession with One Direction. I am a Directioner! No shame, no shame at all :)

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_I'm strong enough, I've always told myself _

_I never want to need somebody else _

_But I've already fallen from that hill, _

_So I'm droppin that guard here's your chance at my heart_

**_Safe - Britt Nicole_**

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Chapter Twenty-One: Need

_**Bella**_

It was Friday, thank God. Bella felt like the week would never end. She was so through with Angela Webber trying to make plans with her to go to the mall. She was always so rude to Bella, and now she wanted to go shopping with her? Good joke. If they were going shopping, Bella was going to push her down the escalator over and over and over.

Apparently Angela didn't get the hint the other six times she asked and Bella declined.

"Are you sure? We could even get manicures after!" Angela clapped, her tone hopeful.

"Angela, I already told you that I'm not the shopping type. And I think I might be doing something this weekend," Bella said.

"Oh, c'mon. It will be _so_ much fun."

Bella stopped walking and turned to face Angela. She was beyond impatient. "_Look_, Angela. I don't want to go shopping with you or hang out with you _ever. _You have been a bitch to me for so many years and now you only want to be my friend because Edward and I are on good terms now. For once in your life could you please, _please_, stop being such a fucking wannabe?"

Angela blinked, almost like she was in shock. Bella was surprised as well – she had never stood up to Angela like that before. Where did that bravery come from? She felt like she should swallow whatever pride she had just conjured and apologize to Angela, but that same pride was also telling her to stand her ground. She watched as Angela's face turned red and her jaw clenched. Bella was sure that she was going to get it now, and then Angela took a deep breath and her color went back to normal. She was obviously still overly pissed, but she put on that fake smile that Bella had seen so many times and sighed.

"Well, I hope that you can find it in you to forgive me," She said lightly, touching Bella's arm. Her eyes wandered around her, and Bella was sure that Angela was making sure that people were watching them. "Give me a call when you're ready for that shopping trip."

Bella stared, baffled, as Angela strode away and tried to include herself in whatever Ben Cheney and his imbeciles of friends were talking about. Ben turned around and gave Bella a small wave before giving Angela a weird look when she wasn't looking. She still wondered what Edward could have done to Ben that would make him so nice to her all of sudden. Everyday he would greet Bella with her actual name … it was weird. Not to mention that everyone was suddenly so kind to her ever since she came to school with Edward that day. It made her frustrated that people were only treating her differently because of Edward; it only proved her theory that the people of Forks needed some sort of leader to figure out how to act. It was ridiculous.

"Un-fucking-believable," Alice said as she approached Bella. She had been talking to Mr. Cormier about the test they had in French the other day since he was shocked that she had gotten every answer right.

"Mr. Cormier still thinks you cheated?"

"Just because I talk more in class than I listen doesn't mean I don't know the language. I finally convinced him that I know my shit when he made me have a conversation in French without any help," She rolled her eyes. "But I was actually talking about how ridiculous Angela is. Is she still asking you to go shopping with her?"

Bella sighed. "She did – she even tried to coax me with a manicure."

"She bullies you for years and now she wants to hang out with you? Bitch, please. She needs to back off."

"I pretty much said just that, and you would think that she would be offended and would never attempt to talk to me again … but no. She just told me to find a way to forgive her or something."

Alice scoffed. "I'm _so _done with Angela's wannabe bullshit. Being accepted really isn't all that it's made out to be. Bitch needs to chill the fuck out."

"Alice," Bella said, touching her friend's arm gently. "Don't get so worked up about it. I said 'no' to her, and I will always say 'no' to her. And you want to know why? Well, because she has never been nice to me and I'd rather not make friends with such people."

"You're friends with Edward," She stated bluntly.

Bella bit her lip. "That's different."

"How is it different, Bella? Please, enlighten me."

"Because he …" Bella swallowed, trying to contain her loud tone and pulled Alice to her locker. She lowered her face and voice. "It's different because even though Edward was a jackass, he was manipulated. Not to mention he saved my life and his family let me stay at their home while mine fled. Now Alice, can _you _enlighten me on why it's not the same?"

"Okay, fine. I see what you mean," Alice said. "But, B, please don't forget what Edward did to you. I wasn't here for all those years but from what I _did_ see it was pretty bad. Don't let him get away with it too easily."

There it was again – Alice telling her not to let Edward get off the hook without hesitation. She wasn't the only one who felt that way either; Edward did too. He didn't say it to her confrontationally, but it was evident in his actions. Since Bella had been living with the Cullen's for a while, she was able to pick up on Edward's little quirks. She could sense whenever he felt guilty and self-loathing, and most of the time it was when him and Bella were being civil or smiling or laughing. His brows would suddenly crease for a second, and then he would recover. Bella didn't want him to feel that way anymore. She didn't want Alice to feel like Bella was too kind. All she wanted was for everyone to accept that she forgave Edward for what happened and move the fuck on.

Of course, she didn't actually say that out loud. In fact, she didn't reply at all. Bella did a kind of response that was a mix of her nodding and shaking her head. She was pretty sure she looked like she was mental so she stopped and grabbed Alice's hand, directing them to the parking lot. Bella didn't want to go to the cafeteria because Edward would be there, and she didn't want to get those side-glances from Alice telling her that she should be a bitch. Besides, Bella was pretty sure that there was a meeting at the theatre during lunch hour – the final cast would be announced. However, she wasn't taking any chances.

Since it was Edward's turn to drive to school, the two girls went into Alice's car. Bella had free period today and didn't plan on coming back until her next class started. Alice didn't mind because she really, _really _hated physics. Well, maybe not as much as she despised chemistry.

"So what do you want to do since we have so much time?" Alice asked as she sped her way through town.

"Honestly, I don't really give a shit. I just need to clear my head," Bella replied, leaning her head back against the seat and closing her eyes. Ever since Edward's audition last week Bella was more overwhelmed than usual. Trying to find Charles Garland was beginning to look more and more impossible, and Detective Newton hadn't called her back to let her know anything about Phil and Renee's whereabouts. When she went to school people actually noticed her and gave a shit – they tried to have conversations with her and include her in their life. It was weird because she knew it was all a lie. They weren't like Alice – they didn't hang around Bella because they appreciated her company. They did it because of Edward, because hanging out with her was suddenly cool. What complete and utter bullshit.

_Life_ seemed to be complete and utter bullshit lately.

Alice parked in front of the playground near Bella's home. She wasn't really comfortable being there since it reminded her of the first time Phil hit her, but she didn't say anything. Some things were just better left unsaid. Alice lowered her chair down so she could lie down and gave Bella a look that told her to do the same. Once she was lying down and she was staring at the roof of the car, she gulped.

"Jasper called me," Alice whispered all of a sudden.

Bella turned her gaze to her friend quickly. "You mean …"

"Yes, I mean the boy that my former best friend and I fought over," She said, her eyes closed and her tone monotonous. "He somehow found my number and called me."

"So what did you do?"

"I heard his voice, he said my name once and I hung up," Her voice quivered slightly. "No matter how much I still care for Jasper, I just can't talk to him. Not yet."

"If you're not ready, Al, then you're not ready. He'll understand," Bella said.

Alice didn't reply right away, it was like she was thinking about what to say next. Bella was patient, letting her friend deal with her feelings. She then looked at Bella and said, "I don't want to be not ready though, Bella. I love him, and I know it's crazy, but I think he's the one for me. But whenever I think about him, I always think of Gianna and how she used my dad's death against me."

"Oh, Alice, you can't honestly believe that Jasper would ever say something like that to you, would you? I mean, I don't know him, but if he liked you then I don't think he would be capable of hurting you that way."

Alice nodded. "Jasper would never do that to me, but I can't help it. Wanting to be with someone, but not being able to because of the reminders from the past is the worst."

Bella didn't have anything else to say so she sat up and hugged Alice, who was trying hard not to cry by sniffling and swallowing her sobs. Bella was always going to be there for Alice, but at that moment all she could think of was how true her friend was. She didn't want to admit it, because she couldn't really accept it. Things with Edward had become more affectionate lately, and though Bella didn't want to think anything more of it, she couldn't help it. She didn't know if Edward was just being kind and staying true to the promise he made about not being a douche, or if he actually liked her. Worse, she didn't know if she was just being nice to him because she was grateful for all he had done for her, or if she was suddenly growing feelings for him …

No. Bella couldn't possibly like Edward in that way, and he couldn't feel the same way. After all the shit they went through, from being enemies to friends didn't mean that crushes fit into that equation. But … did she _want _something more to happen? And if something did happen, was it a good idea?

"Wow, look at the time," Alice said as she pulled away from the hug. "We better get back now or else we'll be late."

Bella glanced at the clock and groaned. "I'm so glad it's Friday."

"Only two more classes and then the weekend is ours," She drove away from the playground and blasted the music. "We really need to do more girl time."

"I agree," Bella, said, even though she knew that she would never be as open about her problems as easily as Alice. It was unfair to Alice, but it was how things were … and it sucked. Majorly.

**x x x x x x**

The final bell rang with joy, like the school was singing to the heavens and telling the students to get the fuck out. Bella had no problem with that – she was ready to go. She collected her things from the gym locker and waited for Alice to finish getting ready. Her mind was much clearer than it had been during lunch. While she should have been participating in gym class, Bella coaxed herself into chilling out. There shouldn't be a reason for her to have an anxiety attack when the weekend was approaching, and since she already had so much to deal with.

"_Bye, Isabella!"_

"_Catch you later, girl."_

"_Awesome shirt!"_

"_Have a good weekend, Isabella. Oh, and tell Edward I said 'hi'."_

Bella got lost in all those voices being directed towards her. She didn't know who said what, so she nodded. It was so weird being acknowledged – it was foreign. Though she had to admit, she was handling it all slightly better than she had a week ago. She didn't get as nervous or self-conscious. Bella realized that she had some sort of power over these people, and it was all because she was friends with Edward. Dealing with such power was confusing though, and it often made her head spin.

"Ready to go?" Alice asked as she puckered her lips and applied lip-gloss.

"As ready as I'll ever be," Bella replied, adjusting the strap of her backpack.

As usual, Alice and Bella were the last to not only leave the locker room, but also the gymnasium. Exiting through the doors, the hallways had become quieter and emptier as students hurried out for the weekend. Lucky for Bella, and this is the only good thing about it, her locker was right across the doors to the gym. At the end of the day, it was a relief that she didn't have to walk to the other end of the school just to drop off her things at her locker.

Bella wasn't surprised when she saw Edward leaning his back against her locker door, his ankles crossed and his hands stuffed in his pockets. He had been waiting for her at the end of the day almost everyday after school. She should have been thinking that it was odd and awkward that he was suddenly there all the time, but she didn't. Bella surprisingly acknowledged it as a kind gesture, and proof that Edward wasn't a complete asshole.

He was wearing a deep blue, v-neck t-shirt and a ripped jeans. Edward had finally gotten a haircut a few days ago, and his hair still looked like it was professionally styled. He grinned when he saw the two of them approaching Bella's locker.

"How was gym?" He asked that question everyday. Bella knew that he didn't actually care; he just mocked her. Not the kind of mocking she was used to, but the friendly, teasing kind.

Bella rolled her eyes. "I got the ball past the goalie in soccer today."

"Seriously?"

"No, Bella didn't do shit all. _I _was the one who got the ball into the net because smart one over here was daydreaming the entire time," Alice laughed, even though it was true. Edward laughed and shook his head, almost like he knew what Alice was going to say. "Anyways, children, I have to go. Call me later, B?"

"Of course," Bella said.

"'Kay, then I'll see you later," She hugged Bella before stepping back and nodding her head to Edward. "See ya, Asshole."

"Always a pleasure, Alice." As the petite girl retreated Edward scratched the back of his neck and chuckled. "Will she ever accept me?"

"Oh, she does," Bella, said as she opened her locker. "She just likes being a bitch to you."

"Good to know."

"Uh-huh." Bella was pretty sure that besides Alice and the staff, her and Edward were the only ones left in school.

"So where were you at lunch?" Edward asked, his tone nonchalant.

Bella shrugged. "Alice and I decided that we needed a break from here. I know we should have invited you but we really needed some girl time …"

"Isabella, relax," Edward interrupted with a smile. "Besides, I have some good news."

"Oh? Well don't keep me waiting then."

"So impatient," Edward teased, shaking his head. "So the final cast was announced and guess what … I got the part."

Bella shut her locker door as she turned to Edward. "That's fantastic! You see, I told you that your audition was great. So how about we go celebrate?"

"What did you have in mind?"

"It doesn't matter what I have in mind – what do _you _want to do?"

Edward sighed, and bit his lip. "Let's go to Port Angeles."

"Will your parents be cool with that?"

"There's no reason that that they shouldn't be okay with it."

"Okay, then. Let's go." Bella led the way to the exit. Opening the door, the cool, wet air brushed against her skin and twirled her hair. "What are we going to do once we get there?"

"I'm thinking that we should just wing it," Edward replied as he pulled out his car keys. He looked so care free, so relaxed. Bella had learned how to read Edward, but it was expressions like these that she wasn't sure how to decipher. He was so good at acting – he could actually be freaking out on the inside, but he could also be truly calm. Bella liked to believe in the second option.

She nodded in agreement. "Sounds good. So start driving, Mr. Cullen."

Edward laughed. "So impatient."

**x x x x x x**

The drive to Port Angeles seemed a lot shorter than it actually was. The conversation in the car consisted of a lot of sarcasm, teasing, wit, and cursing. All of which were used on good terms. And even so, there would be some breaks between words, and Bella would find herself getting lost in her thoughts. Somehow she always found a way to wander her mind. She would worry about the case, if Detective Newton had found anything, and would sometimes glance at her cell phone to see if she missed a call or got a text. It was disappointing that there was nothing, which meant there was no news. However, most of the time, she would end up thinking about Edward.

It was getting out of hand.

The way he would grip the steering wheel. The way his chest moved as he took a breath. The way he could never hold a single expression for too long, because she had a feeling that Edward's thoughts constantly got a hold of him as well. The way he would lick his lips. The way the dark skies made Edward's hair look more brown the bronze, and his eyes a deeper green. He was handsome, and Bella wanted to know why she didn't see it before.

She used to think he was too cocky, which he was, and that it took away from his looks. All the girls in school would always ogle him and she was sick of it. It was pitiful how girls would try to show more cleavage or bend down whenever he was around. She had grown to repel what the female population thought of him, and it didn't help that she hated him. Except now, she didn't hate him. She actually _enjoyed _his company. Bella couldn't see what she saw before; she could only see how much he had changed and that in itself changed how he appeared on the outside. At least, that was Bella's theory.

However, as she thought about this, she couldn't help the, _Teardrops On My Guitar, _feeling that grew on her. Edward was popular, and had probably been with many girls. He was experienced and he most likely liked experienced girls. Bella didn't know why it bothered her, but it did. She hadn't even had her first kiss yet! It shouldn't matter who Edward hooked up and what kind of girls he liked, and Bella kept telling herself this.

Her phone buzzed and Bella got excited, thinking that Detective Newton finally had something. Unfortunately, her excitement was short-lived – it was a text from Alice. Bella felt bad that she wasn't as thrilled to hear from her best friend, as she should have been.

**_What are you and asshole doing?_**

_Celebrating in Port Angeles._

**_What? Bitch, you better explain yourself._**

_Alice, relax. Edward got the part in the play._

**_Oh, okay. Well I'm still raking these mother fucking leaves so if you come back early and still want to hang out, don't hesitate to call._**

_Will do._

"The mall?" Bella said, though it sounded like a question.

"Is that okay? We can go somewhere else if you like …" Edward replied uneasily.

"It's fine, Edward. We're winging it remember?"

"Right," He nodded.

Looking for parking was harder than they expected – it seemed that everyone wanted to come to the mall that day. They eventually found a stall that wasn't too far away from the entrance. Unlocking the doors, Bella was looking forward to stretching her legs. As she reached for the handle, she was shocked when the door opened. Looking up she saw Edward, his eyes gazing into hers with a shy smile.

"I, uh …" He said nervously. "I thought I would get the door for you."

"Oh … well … um … thanks." Her response wasn't anywhere close to smooth, but she was trying to hide the fact that she was blushing. She wished she didn't blush, especially because of something Edward did. When she thought her flustering was over she returned her gaze to Edward with a controlled expression – a gratuitous smile, and she meant it. He looked as if he was going to say something, his mouth opening slightly as he took a deep breath, but he bit the inside of his cheek and nodded his head. Bella was curious – she wanted to know what Edward was going to say. It must have been somewhat of a risk if he held back, which only made her more intrigued. However, she set her curiosity aside and decided it was better to forget because she couldn't force him to admit what he was going to say if she wasn't going to spill all of her stray thoughts herself.

As they retreated from the car, Bella checked her phone again. It was becoming a bit of a habit, and so was the disappointment that followed. She wasn't sure if Edward noticed, and if he did he was good at hiding it.

"I hope you know that I'm not that big of a shopper," Bella explained, trying to light up the mood.

"If I recall, you did come through my bedroom window with countless shopping bags," He said.

"Yes, but I was shopping with Alice that day."

"So I can blame Alice for your successful shopping trip?"

"You can."

"Good to know," Edward laughed as he held the door open for Bella. There it was again – the gentleman act. Bella noticed that he had been doing it a lot lately in the past week. She wondered what that was all about. "And besides, I'm not much of a shopper either."

"Then this should be an interesting trip," Bella said.

Edward nudged her with a playful smile. "I'm hoping it will be."

Bella rolled her eyes in response, because sarcasm was their thing. Shit, they had a _thing, _when did that happen? Things were happening so quickly between them, and Bella didn't know where it would lead. She didn't know if she was ready for whatever path was being made.

"What do you want to do first, Edward?"

They were standing in the middle of the mall, people passed by them in laughter and haste. Edward scanned the area with his eyes, until he landed on a place. "How about the Halloween store?"

"Halloween store … are you serious?" Bella bit the inside of her cheek and tried to slow her heartbeat.

"I mean we don't have to if you don't want to. I just thought it would be fun."

She shook her head. "No, no! We can go. I just … I've never really done the whole Halloween costumes and trick-or-treat thing." Edward turned to Bella, his eyes completely transfixed on her. She didn't get as self-conscious when he did now. "When I was eight my mom went trick-or-treating with me and we came home late. He blamed me for keeping us out all night."

"By blame you mean …"

"He locked me in the closet until dawn," She heard Edward's sharp intake of breath. "I haven't celebrated Halloween since then because I was always afraid that Phil would put me in that closet again, and would never let me out."

Bella forgot how painful it was to revisit her memories, how it made her realize what she had missed in life. She didn't like being pitied, and with the way Edward was looking at her, she knew that Edward didn't belittle her. She appreciated it and shrugged because there wasn't anything she could do about it. Phil was gone and she didn't have the burdens she used to feel.

"Let's go, then," Bella said.

"Are you sure?" Edward questioned with a worried look.

"I am."

"Okay then," He started to lead the way to the store. "Then consider this your dose of Halloween."

"Should I be scared?" She laughed nervously.

Edward turned his head with a smirk. "Maybe just a little."

That smirk, even though it lasted for less than a second reminded Bella of the old Edward. The one who was cocky and knew people liked him. But this time, it was different. This time Bella knew the kind of person Edward was and knew that behind his smirk was a better person. He laughed when the plastic corpse popped out of the coffin and scared Bella. She slapped his arm jokingly, because she knew if that roles were reversed she would have laughed too.

"Try this on," Edward said, tossing the obnoxious witch's hat to her.

Bella placed the hat on her head and put a hand on her hip. "How do I look?"

"Like the hat is going to eat you," He laughed.

"Fine, try this on, funny guy," Bella passed him a Lady GaGa wig. Edward caught it with one hand and positioned the wig on his hair perfectly. Bella burst out in laughter.

"Is it that bad?"

"No, it's worse."

"You're just jealous that I wear this better than GaGa."

"Yes, that's it," Bella said sarcastically.

"Okay, you know what? Let's just do a wardrobe change."

They threw away the headgear and put on different capes and masks, surprising each other each time as they presented a new costume. Bella never would have guessed that Edward was the type that had fun trying on different Halloween costumes. She always thought that he got his shits and giggles being flat out drunk at parties. Seeing him like this made her feel carefree, like everything she ever knew before this moment was irrelevant.

After an hour and a half of being inside that Halloween store, Bella and Edward were kicked out. Apparently they were loud and scaring customers away. It didn't matter though, because they had their fun. Edward proved to her that Halloween wasn't something to fear, and it reminded her of the freedom she now had. It was a relief from the events of lunch and her worries and she was thankful. It was supposed to be a reward for Edward's achievement, but Bella felt that she too was being celebrated. That even through all this shit she had to go through, that there was a better part of life. It was something she never really acknowledged before, but it was something that she was going to continue to recognize. It was a good feeling.

"Are you up for ice cream?" Edward nodded his head to the ice cream stand.

"I'm a sucker for ice cream, so yes."

When they approached the stand Edward ordered cookie dough and Bella asked for the mint chocolate. She didn't even have the chance to reach for her wallet before Edward handed his debit card to the cashier. Bella didn't miss how the girl who was making the ice cream was eyeing Edward. She must have been around their age, with black hair and blue eyes. Bella didn't know if Edward noticed the girl's obvious ogling, but once he retrieved the ice cream from her he handed Bella her cone.

"Thanks for paying," Bella licked her finger where some ice cream had melted onto.

"It's no problem. Let's go sit on the bench over there."

Bella took one last glance at the girl in the ice cream stand. She was surprised that the girl was glaring at her, since she was so attractive. Bella let it slide and licked her ice cream, sitting next to Edward on the wooden bench. The mall had gotten busier since they had arrived, and she found herself comfortable. She didn't have any bruises or cuts to hide and she didn't feel alone. People could have been observing her but for once Bella didn't give a crap. This new sense of confidence was thrilling.

"How come you keep looking at your phone?"

"Huh?" Bella didn't even realize that she was checking her cell.

"Am I really that boring?" Edward asked expectantly.

"What? No! I just," She tucked her phone in her pocket. "I just have this habit. I'm sorry."

Edward didn't seem to buy her half-truth. He scooted closer to Isabella and lowered his voice. "You know you can tell me anything, Isabella. You don't have to be scared."

He was so close, she could practically feel the heat radiating off his skin. Bella didn't need much convincing, she would tell Edward. Besides Alice, Edward had become one of her close friends. It was so odd to say it, but it was true. She didn't like hiding this from her friends, but she couldn't tell Alice. She didn't know why, but she wasn't ready for Alice to know. It was strange that she felt that she should tell Edward first. She didn't understand why that was so.

Bella took a deep breath in, prepared for the story that started this whole situation in the first place. "About a month a go …"

"Bella?" A voice, that was not Edward's, called to her. She stopped midsentence and looked out into the crowd. Emerging from the cluster of people was Brant, chestnut hair and all. "Bella, it is you. How have you been?"

"Oh, wow … Brant. It's been a while," Bella greeted, shocked that he was here. She knew that Brant lived in Port Angeles but what were the chances that she would be seeing him now? "I've been okay. What about you?"

Brant shrugged and stuffed his hands in his pockets. "I've been alright, I guess. You know, I waited for your call."

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry!. I guess I've just been busy lately."

"I'm sure you have," He eyed Edward.

"Edward, this is Brant. The guy I was with a while back at the diner? He lives here in Port Angeles." It felt like a good time to do introductions. Bella remembered the last time Edward met Brant, and it didn't end well.

"Yeah, I remember you," Edward said monotonously, glaring at Brant.

It didn't take long for Bella to realize that Brant was giving Edward the same look. She could feel the tension. It made her hands sweaty. They were arguing with their eyes, lavender fighting with emerald. They had no reason to be looking at each other that way, but for some reason both boys continued their silent battle. Bella sat there, feeling more awkward than ever, wishing that it would end soon.

It was Edward who broke eye contact first. "I'll meet up with you later, Isabella. Just give me a call when you and Brant are done."

"What are you – " Bella's sentence got cut off when Edward got up from the bench and walked away in haste.

"I'm sorry about that," Brant said, taking Edward's spot. "I didn't mean to drive him away."

Bella glanced at where Brant was sitting and knew she wasn't comfortable with him sitting where Edward was only seconds ago. She began to sit up. "Look, Brant. You're a good guy, but I think that we should stop talking to each other for now."

"Wait, Bella, is this about Edward?"

"It is … and I have to go." Bella shot up from the bench and threw her ice cream into the trash.

She ran down the mall, hoping she was following the same footsteps that Edward took. There was so many people there, and she was afraid she wouldn't find him in the crowd. She eventually found herself in front of the Halloween store and stopped, panting. She put her hands on her hips and took a deep breath, feeling like a failure. She had no idea what had happened and didn't know why Edward bolted like that. She had come to the conclusion that she could not find Edward and he would not actually answer her call.

In the corner of her eye was a flash of bronze. She turned around and saw Edward exiting the mall. She ran towards him, almost knocking down an old man in the process. She finally reached him the parking lot, close to where his car was parked.

"Edward!" She yelled, still running. "Edward, wait!" By the time Edward turned around, Bella was angry and annoyed. "What the hell is your problem?"

He shook his head. "It doesn't matter, Isabella."

"Like hell it doesn't! Tell me why you stormed off like that, and don't give me bullshit."

"Fine, you want to know why I'm pissed? I'm like this because Brant showed up out of nowhere and I don't like him. You know that."

"That doesn't make any sense. I came here with you, not him."

"I know, I know," Edward ran a hand through his hair. "I guess I overreacted. I'm sorry."

Bella sighed. "It's fine, Edward."

"No, it's not fine!" He exclaimed. "Stop forgiving me. Tell me that you're mad at me."

"Why?"

"Because you forgive too fucking easily. I tortured you for _years _and you forgive me just like that. And now I do some asshole stunt and you let it go like it's not a big deal. Don't tell me that you're not mad just so I won't feel like shit, let it out. Let it the _fuck_ out, Isabella. Just say it!"

"Okay, fine!" Bella yelled back. "You want to know how I feel? You believed Rosalie and bullied me because of it. It wasn't even true, and I had to go through all of that shit. Your popularity caused everyone else to alienate me and you didn't even feel bad about it. You care too much about your fucking reputation and how others portray you and it's annoying. This anger inside of me has been growing for a long time, as well as the feeling of loneliness and failure.

Then I get to know you, and things have changed. You're not the pretentious asshole I thought you used to be. I actually trusted you, but then you fucked everything up with what you just did. Brant was only acting like that in response to you. I told him that I didn't want to talk to him anymore because of you, but now I'm not so sure that it was a good idea. God, Edward! I was going to tell you something that no one besides Detective Newton knows, and now I don't know if I should even try. You hurt me, and no matter how much you redeem yourself, you find a way to do it again."

She was out of breath, her cheeks were hot and her jaw was clenched. Edward looked like he had just been hit in the gut, and he had no one to blame for himself. He built her up to this moment. She didn't want to explode, but he wanted her to. She should have felt like a weight was lifted off her shoulders, but it was almost like she was carrying more than before. It wasn't long until Bella started crying.

"Phil's not even my dad, Edward. I learned about that, _hours_, before I tried to commit suicide. I found it in a letter that my biological father's name is Charles Garland and that everything I used to know was a lie. Detective Newton has been searching for Phil and Renee, and finally traced them somewhere near Vancouver, but by the time they got there the two of them were gone. I don't know where they are and that scares me, Edward. I don't feel as safe as I should be feeling, because they could be anywhere. I'm breakable. I have secrets and it makes me vulnerable."

Bella wiped away the tears and let out a deep breath. She wasn't angry anymore. Edward walked towards her and she thought she was going to give her a comforting hug, but instead he cupped her face and pressed her lips to hers. He was gentle – like he was nervous. Bella didn't move, she stood in shock.

When Edward's lips left hers, he looked into her eyes and said, "We all have secrets, Bella."

As she stared at Edward, watching the gold flecks in his green eyes shine and breathing in his autumn scent, Bella knew. The feeling that she had been trying to deny for so long could no longer be ignored. The feeling she could not identify was now as clear as day. She had grown feelings for Edward and there was no turning back. Bella pressed her mouth to Edward's, her hands in his hair. He deepened the kiss and pushed her against his car with his hands on her hips. Their lips were moving together as one, like it was natural for them to be doing this together.

Bella could feel her skin tingle as her heart beat faster. It was like everything that happened before that night in the woods didn't exist. All that mattered was the two of them and how that night changed everything.

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**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

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**I'm really sorry for the extremely late update. When I updated the last time I didn't think it would take me so long to put this chapter up. The truth is that I've been so busy with school. November and December has basically been crunch time since the semester is basically over and final exams start in January. So I'm sorry that I have taken so much time from this story, but hopefully during this winter break I can get another chapter up soon. Fingers crossed! :)**

**So, yeah. How did you guys like this chapter? I don't really know what to say about it because ... well, I don't know haha. I'm very pleased with it! Hopefully you guys are as well.**

**Also, last chapter this story hit 1000+ reviews! WOW! Thank you all so much for your continuous support. I don't know what I would do without all of you. Thank you for getting this story to where it is. You guys are beyond amazayn (yes, I just used One Direction into my words. Got a problem? No? Good, that's fabulouis).**

**I am currently reading the Moral Instruments series by Cassandra Clare ... I. Am. Addicted. So basically at the end of the first book I was freaking the fuck out because, and I'm not going to say anything so I don't spoil it for anyone, I did not see _that _coming! Like, the fuck? Holy shit! I don't even know what to do with myself. ****Right now I'm halfway through the City of Ashes and I'm really enjoying it so far, but I'm still crying over what was revealed at the end of the first book. If you don't know what I'm talking about and have read the series, PM me and I'll happily reply. I need to vent.**

**Okay so I hope all of you had a wonderful Christmas and have a great New Year! 2012! I also hope you guys don't hate me :) I promise I'll try to get the next one out soon.**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**Much Love,**

**Karina**


	22. Chapter Twenty Two: Flicker

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own tickets to the midnight premiere to The Hunger Games! Eeeek :)

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_It's different now I swear_

_There's something in the air tonight_

_And I can only stare at the glimmer of the night lights_

_And what I used to be scared of is making me aware of why_

**_This City Never Sleeps - Jason Walker_**

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Chapter Twenty-Two: Flicker

_**Bella **_

How did this happen? How did Bella end up _kissing _Edward? Her first kiss was with a boy she never thought would happen with, and yet she was completely content with it. She was sure her cheeks were flaming and her heart would never beat the same again, but all she could think about was how perfect it was. Was every kiss supposed to feel like this? Was it supposed to leave her breathless all the time? Bella wondered if Edward was feeling the same way. He had probably kissed many other girls before and that made her self-conscious. She wasn't even close to experienced like those other girls were. Though, he did kiss her back.

Why did he kiss her though? Was it to shut her up or was it because he actually wanted to? She liked it though, they way he sucked on her bottom lip and cupped her chin. It was forceful, yet gentle. She didn't know Edward was going to kiss her and it surprised her, though she was even more shocked that she was the one to have initiated it the second time. Bella couldn't describe what she was feeling into one word. Dizzy. Euphoric. Tingly. Confused. Fluttery. Anxious. As she stared into Edward's eyes, their breaths staggered and his lips swollen, she could tell that he was searching hers as well. At that moment Edward looked vulnerable and nervous.

"I'm sorry," Bella, whispered shakily.

Edward slightly cocked his head to the side. "What for?"

"For not telling you about my dad sooner. Your family has been so kind to me and not telling them was wrong."

"Well, do you want my parents to know?"

"Not really …" She said honestly.

"Then we won't tell them," Edward said easily. She was going to question him but was interrupted when he continued; "I'll do anything for you."

"Why is that?"

"I like you Isabella, duh," Edward smiled sheepishly. "Like shit, after the hell I put you through I _shouldn't _feel this way … but I do."

"And after your whole asshole phase I shouldn't have kissed you, but I did. So guess we're even."

"Oh, really?" Edward batted his eyelashes.

Bella bit her lip. "Really." Edward's lips were on hers again and it took Bella's breath away. She pulled away, though she didn't really want to, and sighed. "So what does that mean for us?"

"Like, _us_?" Bella nodded. "We'll take it one step at a time and see where this leads."

"I like that."

"Good. Now can I kiss you again?"

"Let's just go home, Edward," She laughed.

"How about when we go home?"

"We'll see." Bella gave him a mysterious smile; at least, she thought it was mysterious. Well whatever she did made Edward smile and start the engine. She realized that there was no point in time when she made a decision that she liked Edward, that many things led her to this moment – to how she was feeling right now. She couldn't even try to imagine how she used to see him. At this moment, and probably for a while now, Edward was a normal person who, like others, was misguided. Bella liked to believe that she helped him recover to morality, but she wasn't going to take credit for it. The truth was that Edward did all the changing on his own, and on his own terms. And somewhere along the way he developed feelings for her and she, him.

God, it was so weird to be thinking such things. Who knew that one kiss would trigger such emotions? Well, duh … that was a really stupid question. But that's what that damn kiss was doing to her! She was not flirting with insanity, and that was saying so much for her. Still, she didn't want to come down from such a high nor did she even dream of it. Never before did she think a boy would ever develop feelings for her. Not just because of what happened at school, but because of Phil too. He made her feel worthless.

She was thirteen at the time, shy of fourteen. That awkward age when girls are on the fence of flat chests and boobs, slim and curvy. Unfortunately for Bella, she didn't have the curvaceous body. Renee always assured her that she would fill out, that she was just a late bloomer like her mother. However, Phil had his own opinion.

"No boy will ever like you," Phil spat. "Why can't you grow up like other girls? You're going to be alone for the rest of your life and end up living with us until we die. Is that what you want, Bella … to be unmarried and living with your parents?"

Bella shook her head, holding back tears. "No, Daddy."

"Then fix the way you look," He said, giving her one last look over with disgust before walking away.

She remembered staring at her bathroom mirror for hours, crying her eyes out as she constantly asked God why he made her so ugly. Of course she eventually filled out and her confidence got a little better, but it didn't change what Phil had said to her. Since then Bella never believed that she would find someone who liked her in that way and yet here was Edward, Forks' High School's most wanted, and he was fascinated with her. But why? There was so many other girls that he could end up with, and it didn't make sense for him to like her. She was damaged and her life was screwed over.

Edward pulled over into the Diner and rested his arm around her shoulders. He was facing her when he asked, "Want to tell me what you're thinking about?"

_No, not really. _"Why me?"

"I don't understand."

"Don't act stupid Edward. Why like me when there are so many other girls to choose from? So many other girls who are better than me …"

"Okay, I'm going to stop you there," He said, his green eyes trying to get her to understand. What of, she wasn't sure. "How about we get something to eat and I'll explain myself to you."

Bella's eyes went wide in surprise, shifting from the building and back to Edward. "The Diner … on a Friday night … really?"

"Yeah, so?"

"Aren't you worried that some of your friends will see us?"

Edward groaned. "How many times do I have to tell you so that you'll believe me? Isabella, I don't give two shits what people say or think about me anymore. I'm so through with all of the stereotypical bullshit in this town. I'm just doing me and if the people here don't accept it, then too fucking bad," He pulled her closer then, her shoulder touching his chest. "And besides, we're taking it one step at a time right?"

Sending shivers down her spine, Bella nodded. "Okay."

How did he do that? How did Edward so easily convince her to do something like this when it was so clear that she was scared to death? Okay, not to death – but it was pretty damn close. Getting out of the car, the cold breeze breathed through Bella's sleeve and along her skin, helping her relax. Edward was immediately by her side and closed her door for her. He was going to reach for her hand but almost like he sensed that she was uneasy, he pulled away. Bella felt guilty; she didn't want to feel uneasy around Edward, even though it wasn't really him specifically that was making her feel that way. It was the revelation she had not more than two hours ago and it was Edward's confession. It was everything that led to this evening and this situation that made Bella wonder what the hell was going to happen next.

Holding the entrance door open for her, Bella stepped inside with a thankful smile. Edward gave her one of his lopsided grins, which was handsome despite the fact that it seemed that he was a little nervous too. She looked away from him before anything else happened, and almost gasped when she saw the place.

It seemed as though the entire town of Forks had decided to come to the diner. In truth only a few people were there, but Bella still felt like it was crowded. She was anxious and she knew it was because she was with Edward … and everyone could see it. He was so calm and collected, and she was on a constant edge. She was so exposed, like a part of her was being shown for everyone to see and make judgments upon.

Before Edward, Bella was able to appreciate the sense of invisibility that she had. Sure, her peers still judged her, both mentally and verbally, but she was able to tune it out most of the time. However, at this moment, she wasn't able to because she was sharing Edward's spotlight. That imaginary light that attracted people to him. Bella now understood why Edward felt like he had to keep up appearances at all costs. With such charisma people expected so much, and letting them down was almost like an embarrassment.

Bella came to the conclusion that she was truly not meant for that spotlight – it was too much to handle. It also made her itch, well; it made her itch in her mind.

"Get us a good seat, T?" Edward requested to the blonde hostess. She was younger and maybe could use some skin remedy, but she was pretty. They seemed to know each other quite well, though it was probably because they worked together.

"Don't I always?" She teased. She gave Bella one quick glance before turning her head back to Edward. "Is this…?" Edward gave her slight nod, cutting her off. The hostess made an 'o' with her lips before giving Edward a look that Bella couldn't decipher. "Follow me, you two."

Bella wondered what the hostess was talking about and what Edward had confirmed. They were obviously referring to Bella, but _what_ about her? Had Edward mentioned her before? She felt a little more exposed than she did before except this time, she couldn't explain why. She didn't know what the hostess knew about her … it was nerve racking.

She led them to a booth in the back.

"You're welcome," She said to Edward, who patted her in the back before sliding into the booth. Bella slid in opposite of him while the hostess gave them their menus and walked away.

Edward was already scanning through the menu when Bella asked, "Do you talk about me?"

He looked at her through his eyelashes. "Huh?"

"The hostess seemed to know who I was, so I was just wondering if you've ever mentioned me." Edward seemed to hesitate so Bella quickly added, "You don't have to tell me what you said. It's okay if it was bad things, I just wanted to know."

"Isabella," Edward said gently as he put down his menu. "Do you remember that day when your parents picked you up from school?"

Bella flinched at the memory, but nodded.

"Well, at the time I didn't know that. You left your books in class and you never came back, so I knew something was up. I searched the entire town for you, even the woods. One of the places I looked was this diner and I asked Tanya if she saw you. I didn't give her a name, only a description. She just guessed that you were the girl I was looking for."

"That's all?"

"Yeah, that's it. What, were you expecting worse?"

"Sort of," Bella admitted.

"I'm not one to gossip," Edward said. "And besides, I was really worried that day – I didn't feel like holding up a conversation."

Bella blushed because she knew that Edward was implying that he was worried about her. She didn't need to say anything because he gave her a sweet smile before looking through the menu again. She felt guilty for semi-assuming that Edward would say horrible things about her, but it's what she expected. A lot of what she used to know was changing, and hopefully it was for the better.

She quickly looked over the menu before giving her order to the red headed senior. 'Victoria', her nametag read, and though Bella didn't really know her, she recognized her from school. Victoria most definitely knew who Bella was since she had a slight expression of shock when she saw that Edward was sitting with her. She had covered it up quickly, but Bella had expected that kind of reaction from her peers. Why would Edward be having dinner with the Duck? Bella didn't really know the answer, but she couldn't help but feel a little proud that out of all the pretty and popular girls, he liked her. After everything, he chose her.

And then, that thought made her _really _think. Before all of this, Bella thought Edward was an asshole. He wasn't shy to humiliate her or scold her. That went on for _years_. Yes, Edward apologized and yes, Bella forgave him, but that didn't change what happened. It didn't change the never-ending self-loathing that occurred. And yet, even with all of that crap, she couldn't seem to find that same hate that she used to hold for him. It just meant that Bella was scared that he could change at any moment, and the Edward she knew would be put back into the shadows.

"You look stressed," Edward commented.

"I was just thinking about all of this, about how much has happened … and about us. Mostly about us."

"What _about_ us?"

"Aren't you worried about what people are going to think?"

"Not really."

"Are you sure? What if what they say is bad … what if what they say start to matter to you again?"

"Is that what this is about?" Edward asked. Bella didn't want to say anything, but she was sure her silence was confirmation enough. He grabbed her hand from across the table and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Isabella I don't know what I have to do to convince you that I've left that part of me behind. Like, fuck, I'm just as scared as you are. I don't know where this is going, but what I do know is that you're different …"

Bella gave a small scoff.

"… Don't be like that. You're a _good _different, and I'm sorry that I had to be an asshole in order to figure that out. I know it's sudden, but I'm willing to give this a try if you are. It isn't going to be easy, but I'm willing to do whatever it takes for you."

The look on Edward's face rendered Bella speechless. His eyes were wide and compassionate, his mouth slightly open. He looked so vulnerable, so open. Bella put her other hand on top of his. She wasn't really good at this romantic stuff, but she thought it felt right. "I want to try too … but you'll just have to be patient with me."

Edward then broke into a smile, and Bella couldn't help the little flip-flops that occurred in her stomach. "Of course, we'll go at your pace."

The diner was filling up now and the chatter was getting louder. And even so, Bella didn't seem to pay much attention to it. They were still holding hands and Bella realized that this was the first time that they had done so. It felt so _right. _They were silent, but they seemed to have a conversation with their eyes. The way Edward was looking at her made Bella blush and quickly look down. A boy had never looked at her like that before and she didn't know how to describe the look. It was indescribable to her – it was foreign. It was nice.

"Here we are," Victoria interrupted with the tray of food. Bella and Edward both pulled away and she felt her hands go cold. The smell of her spaghetti filled her nose and she didn't even realize she was hungry until her stomach growled. "Can I get you two anything else?"

Bella shook her head as Edward politely said, "I think we're good here, Vick."

They ate in silence again, and Bella was pretty sure it was because both of them were starving. That, or because both of them had a lot to think about. Bella had a feeling that it was a mix of the two, but she could only really speak for herself. As she chewed, her eyes wandered the diner. It wasn't much, but for Forks, it was enough. She never really spent any time to appreciate this restaurant, and she guessed it was because she hated Forks with such a passion. She never wanted to see the good things that this town had to offer but, for some reason, it was like her mind was willing to open up.

However, that didn't mean she still didn't hate Forks, because she definitely did. Bella was still set on her plan to leave after she graduated. There was a better life out there for her. Somewhere out there she could start over and completely forget the life she had to unfortunately have in Forks.

Then Bella glanced at Edward quickly, who had done the same. They shared a smile before looking away. Leaving would mean leaving Edward behind, leaving what he and his family had done for her. She wasn't sure if Edward wanted to leave as much as she did. Honestly, she had no idea why she was even thinking about it – they weren't really _anything yet. _The status of their relationship was yet to be named, and that was okay with Bella. At least, she thought it was. She rubbed her wrist, the bruises had healed a long while ago but Bella remembered when Alice had noticed it the first day of school. Bella wouldn't just be leaving Edward – she would also be leaving Alice. How was it even possible to live seventeen years alone and in as little as three and a half months work up to having such close relationships? She wasn't prepared for it at all, but now she couldn't imagine being alone.

Bella wondered if that was how Charles Garland felt, sending those letters to Renee, trying to get to see his own daughter but never receiving the chance. She wasn't the only victim of the lies Renee and Phil had created, Charles was as well. She never wanted to find someone so badly before, but she didn't even know where to start.

"Do you remember when I told you that Phil wasn't my dad?" She quietly asked.

"It's hard to forget such news," Edward replied.

Bella set her fork down and looked him in the eye. "If I ask you to do something, would you do it?"

"Depending on the situation, I guess. However, I think you would find a way to bring me into it no matter what. So shit, yeah, I probably would."

She couldn't help but roll her eyes – of course Edward would go from a so-so answer to a confident one. "I know it's a lot to ask for but I want to look for my real father, and I don't know where to start …"

"Isabella …"

"… I _know _it's a lot to ask for but it would make looking for him that much easier …"

"I …"

"… It's just I can't _stand _not knowing who he is, now that I'm aware of his existence. I want answers and I really don't want to do this alone – "

"Isabella," Edward interrupted, his voice stern yet his face gentle. "You don't have to ask me. I kind of already employed myself to the job the minute you told me about it."

Bella straightened up. "Really?"

"Yeah, really," He took a sip of his coke before continuing. "Winter break starts in a week, so we can begin then. How's that?"

"That sounds great."

She wanted to hug him, but she didn't. Bella wasn't sure Edward was up to it, thinking that he may not want to be involved. It was heavy stuff, what Bella was looking for. Not only would she want to find Charles, she wanted to know _why. _She had a feeling that there was a lot more at stake than what Edward might be thinking. She wanted to warn him, but she didn't know what she would be warning him about.

Edward paid the bill not long after that. Bella didn't even try to chip in because she knew that Edward would not allow it. She remembered that she was running a little low on cash, and she didn't want to reach into her savings. Bella would need to get a job soon – probably in Port Angeles, because she couldn't imagine working with the people in Forks. Ugh. The people here pissed her off to no end. She hid her distaste as Edward held the car door open for her. His car smelled of pine; cool and fresh.

They were home in less than ten minutes and the rain had begun to fall. Droplets of ice-cold water fell on the tip of her nose and she giggled. It tickled and she wiped it away quickly as more fell onto her hair and her shoulders. In the midst of her fit her eyes landed on Edward, who was watching her with confusion and amusement. She shrugged as he shook his head and led her up the porch steps. Unlocking the front door, Bella was met with a rush of warm air and the smell of freshly baked cookies. The only light on was the lamp and Bella realized that it was late into the night. She hadn't known that they had been out for that long, and from Edward's subtle snort she guessed that he hadn't either. Time had passed so quickly since the last bell had rung in the afternoon.

"I'm going to bed – I'm beat," Edward said.

"I'm a little thirsty … I think I'll just stay down here for a little bit," Bella looking away.

"Okay then. Good night, Isabella," He whispered, close enough that she could feel his breath tickle her ear.

"Night, Ed – " Bella began to say before she was interrupted with Edward's kiss.

It was feather-light, his hands caressing her face as her eyes slowly closed. She breathed him in and her arms wrapped around his neck. Bella didn't know when it happened, but suddenly the kiss deepened and Edward's mouth opened and sucked her bottom lip and his hands moved from her face and slid down her back. She was covered in goose bumps as she pressed herself into him. And all too soon, he pulled away. They were both out of breath but neither of them let go of each other.

Edward kissed her forehead. "Sweet dreams, Isabella."

Before she could even get a word out, he was walking up the stairs and away from her. She felt empty; like that kiss had taken away a part of her. The thing, however, was that she was okay with it. And as she got a glass of water, her hand still shaking, Bella hoped that Edward would take care of that little piece she had given him. For that empty place was filled with thoughts of him, like he had given her something as well, and she would make damn sure that she held onto it with all her might.

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**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

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**Okay, before you rip my head off for not updating in months, I would like a chance to explain myself:**

**I've been super busy with school and dance, and also a few personal matters. I don't like not updating for more than two weeks, but sometimes life gets in the way. With the being said, I appreciate that most of you have given me space and have messaged me asking what's up and/or saying it's okay and to just take my time. Thank you for your patience. Now, for those who have sent me messages demanding me to update with the "threat" of never reading this again, then all I really have to say is ... it's your choice. You have to understand that I'm 17 - I have a life too. I go to school and hang out with my friends. I have activities and other commitments. I'm graduating from high school this June and am trying to ensure I go to university this fall. For those accusing me for tumbling and tweeting all the time and not updating as much, it's because I have tumblr and twitter on my phone. Can I write freely on my phone? No. I can't. As much as I want to write everyday and get an update for this story every week, sometimes I can't. Sometimes I'll have to do homework or dance or family or friends before this story, and that's because I'm living a life outside of FanFiction. I love you all and I can't thank you enough for what you have done for this story, but for those who threaten me after not updating in months are selfish. You people have lives, I have mine. Please respect that.**

**Now with that being said and done ... HOLA! I missed you all so much. I really hope you understand why I haven't updated in so long. There's a ton of stuff that I'm not going to disclose on here, but I hope you enjoyed this update anyways. The end is probably my favorite :)**

**Thank you all for your patience, and I hope you forgive me. I'm sending you all imaginary hugs!**

**REVIEW PLEASE AND THANK YOU :)**

**Much Love,**

**Karina.**


	23. Chapter Twenty Three: Faded

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a copy of City of Lost Souls (which was amazing, by the way. I'll talk about it in my author's note)!

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_And every time I'm meant to be acting sensible_

_You drift into my head_

_And turn me into a crumbling fool._

**_Crazy For You - Adele_**

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Chapter Twenty-Three: Faded

_**Edward**_

Edward couldn't sleep, and even though he wanted to believe that it was because all he could think about was Isabella, the truth was that it was because he was _starving. _He rose from bed with a headache and his stomach growling, rubbing his eyes from the pale blue moonlight creeping from his window. Landing on the floor, its cold surface tickling his feet, he found himself feeling slightly woozy. Edward hated dreaming about food, it was a pain in the ass to have to wake up and find something to eat while not trying to pass out.

Beads of sweat began to form on Edward's forehead as he made his way to the kitchen. Faint sighs and snores echoed into the hallway, reminding him that he wished that he was sleeping soundly as well. Nausea hit him again, and Edward knew that if he went back to bed at that moment, that he would feel even worse. Fuck, why did he have to dream about making pizza? What a stupid ass dream! Why couldn't he have dreamt about cars or fame or … or Isabella? Oh, Isabella. Remembering what happened last night made Edward smile, only for a second, before he clutched his stomach.

The plate of cookies was still on the counter when Edward arrived. He could feel his mouth salivate as he neared, the aroma filling his nose. He placed a cookie into his mouth and moaned. Edward loved his mother's food, right now especially. The headache began to slip away, as did the nausea. He didn't feel cold anymore, nor was he sweating. Edward finished the entire plate of cookies before going to the fridge and pouring himself a glass of milk. Gulping it down, Edward glanced at the medicine cabinet and realized why he was filling so ill all of a sudden. He cursed at himself and made his way to the cabinet.

Edward remembered the last time he had forgotten to take it – he was around ten. He was playing in the backyard since it was so lovely outside. The sun had been shining and the sky was clear, the infinite green of Forks seemed to illuminate that day. Esme's bakery was still in business at the time, and she had been busy baking a wedding cake for a young couple. God, Edward could remember it like the back of his hand. Everything was so vivid. Carlisle had been sitting on the porch with the phone in his hand and a pencil in the other. He had been discussing something with a colleague when Edward felt his head go light and his heart beat faster than it ever had before. He fell to the ground not too long after that. When he woke up he was in the hospital and his parents were standing above him. They had explained what had happened and Edward, being only ten, began to cry. Not for himself, but for his parents. He did not mean to make them worry.

From that day on, Edward was very careful with himself. He was good at it too, that was, until Isabella came along. In no way did Edward blame her – she made him feel something that he never felt before. It was indescribable. Literally. However, his thoughts had been clouded with her lately, her brown eyes and soft skin overpowering his most important responsibilities.

Opening the familiar black kit, Edward tried to rid his thoughts of Isabella, but failed immensely. Edward could not forget how her lips felt on his – it was like the kiss lingered in his mind and on his mouth. He could still remember how she smelled – of spring, of the flowers that bloomed and as fresh as a waterfall. Edward hadn't expected to kiss Isabella, but she was so, _so _angry with him. Kissing her happened in the heat of the moment, because he was angry with her too. Angry that Brant showed up and was obviously still attracted to her. Angry that she forgave too fucking easily, yet glad that she finally let him have it. Lord knows that Edward very well deserved the hateful things Isabella said to him. But still, that first kiss was like a door opening. For a moment, Edward was able to see inside Isabella, able to feel all of the hurt and loneliness she had experienced, and in the moment, Edward had wanted her to see him too. However, he was too much of a coward, and knew that if Isabella saw everything Edward had, she would run away.

"Honey?" Edward turned around to see Esme standing behind the counter, her eyes tired. "Why are you up?"

"Midnight snack," He shrugged, putting away the black kit and shaking his arm. "I'm sorry if I woke you."

"It's fine, Edward. Just remember to clean the crumbs off the table, yes?"

Edward inwardly rolled his eyes. "Yes, Mom."

Esme eyed him for a moment before pulling her robe closer to her chest and going back to bed. She acted like she didn't know that he wasn't feeling well, but Edward knew that she did. In his seventeen years he had learned a lot about human behavior, especially his mother's. Out of the Cullen family Esme was the one who worried about Edward the most, and he knew this because he sometimes caught her staring worriedly at him or stroke his hair with too gentle of a touch. He learned that it was better to not press his mother about it, because he knew that all Esme wanted was for her son to live life with no worries. Most of the time he did, though other times he didn't know what to do with himself.

Like right now. He was standing in a moonlit kitchen alone, with an empty plate in front of him and the medicine cabinet mocking him from behind. He picked up the plate from the counter and put it in the dishwasher, nearly hitting his head on the way back up. He drank the rest of his milk and finished with a sigh. That shit hit the spot. Edward did as instructed and cleaned the crumbs off the counter, putting it in the trash with a clap of his hands. He sighed and brought the back of his wrist to his forehead, closing his eyes. There was so much to think about, but Edward shut it out. He didn't have the time do go over all of the fucked up thoughts he had – he was tired, and hell, if he wanted to sleep then sleep was what he was going to get.

_Yeah, take fucking control,_ Edward thought to himself, shaking his hand through his hair and letting out a deep breath. He lazily went back to his room, not wanting to turn on any of the lights simply because his eyes were half open. It was amazing that he didn't trip going up the stairs, but Edward had never been clumsy. Not that he was being cocky or whatever, it was just true. If God cursed him with one thing, he was blessed with grace.

Edward walked past Isabella's room, and though he didn't mean to walk back and check in on her, he couldn't help it. Edward gently pressed his hand to the door and pushed it open a sliver. He could see the way the moonlight hit her clear skin, the way her dark hair waved along the pillow. She seemed so peaceful until he noticed her eyebrows crease as she bit her lip, clutching the edge of the blanket. She began to mumble something, though it was too quiet for Edward to hear. She looked so distressed, and Edward couldn't handle it. He wanted to walk right in and wake her up, remind her that she was safe … but he fought the urge and closed the door. He could feel his heart ache as he went to his room and shut the door behind him. He fell into bed, staring at the ceiling.

Isabella was one of the strongest people Edward had known, but she was also the most fragile. Edward had to remember that she wasn't as tough as she sometimes portrayed herself to be. He turned his head to the wall – on the other side Isabella was dreaming of scary things, and he wanted to stop it.

"_Fuck,_" he grumbled as he turned onto his other side, pulling the sheets up to his shoulders. Closing his eyes, Edward took a deep breath and tried to think of something else. He was an over-analytical bastard – always thinking of what _could _be happening instead of what is _actually _occurring. Honestly, he didn't know where he got the habit from, but it was a pain in the ass. As much as he wanted to take his mind off of things, all he could think about was Isabella on the other side of that damn wall.

He hadn't realized that he had flipped onto his other side until his face was inches from the wall. Edward couldn't stop his hand from pressing onto the cold surface, almost like he was trying to sense Isabella by that touch. It did him no good, and he cursed. Edward watched with a hopeless heart as his hand slid from the wall and onto the bed. He closed his eyes again and prayed that Isabella had sweet dreams from now on because if she had nightmares every night, he knew that he would never get a good night's rest.

**x x x x x x**

Edward woke up to the sun shining brightly into his bedroom. He groaned and pulled the sheets over his head. He could hear someone working in the kitchen and wished they would just stop whatever the hell they were doing. The amount of sleep he was able to get wasn't enough. Edward's eyes were sore as he rubbed them, and he debated whether or not he should just get up or continue trying to block out the world and go back to sleep. However, by doing this Edward found himself already thinking of what was going to happen today – wondering if today was going to be bearable or a pain in the ass.

_Ugh, fuck it, _He thought in his head.

Cold air brushed his body as he ripped off the sheets. He stretched his arms over his head as he yawned, already regretting his decision to get out of bed. Edward walked through the door, his body feeling heavier than he thought possible, and yawned. A subtle gasp made him open his eyes as he left his bedroom. Isabella stood in sweats and her hair in a bun. Her face was stripped of makeup, her smooth skin glowing in the morning light. Edward still couldn't believe he didn't notice how beautiful she was before. He couldn't stand that he was such an asshole before any of this.

"I'm sorry," she said, the corner of her mouth turning into a grin as a warm blush filled her cheeks.

Edward rubbed his chin and chuckled under his breath. "No, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you."

"Oh, you didn't frighten me it's just that …" Isabella let the rest of her sentence dissolve into the air as she shook her head and laughed. "Let's get some breakfast, yeah?"

"Um, sure. Okay," Edward replied, wondering what that was about. He followed Isabella as she descended down the stairs and hugged the sweater closer to her body.

Was she embarrassed about last night? They kissed, that was all. However, to Edward it wasn't just a kiss. It was _more _than that, and shit, did he sound like a girl. He couldn't get it out of his head, watching as Isabella walked in front of him. It took all he had not to grab her from behind and turn her around, to press his mouth against hers. God, he didn't mean to sound so forward, but he couldn't help it …

Shit, maybe that was why she was so nervous around him. Maybe Edward was too forward last night. Maybe he shouldn't have told her how he felt about her. But didn't she sort of say she felt the same way? After all, Isabella _was _the one who initiated the kiss the second time, and it wasn't like she complained after the last one they shared. Hell, Edward wondered if this was how those girls felt after he made out with them at parties. If his asshole-like moves sent them on frenzy, surely that was never his intention. And now he wondered if Isabella was acting weird because she thought that Edward would do the same thing to her. Edward had to let her know that he wouldn't do that, not to _her. _It was he who was going crazy, and he didn't necessarily like it.

"Are you going to stand there like a creep or are you going to eat?" Isabella teased, bringing him out of his reverie.

He shook his head with a small chuckle under his breath. "Always bringing me down."

"My day wouldn't be complete if I don't wound your ego at least once."

"Hmm," Edward murmured with a smile, making Isabella blush. It flattered him, because he didn't intentionally make her cheeks turn light pink, and knowing that he had _some _sort of affect on her made him feel good.

_And today was the day you turned into a girl, Cullen._

"Your father is going to be working late tonight and I have to run some errands. If neither of us are home by dinner just go on and order pizza," Esme said, stunning Edward because he did not realize that his own mother was in the kitchen as well. He had been so absorbed by Isabella that everything else seemed insignificant.

"We'll be okay, Mrs. Cullen," Isabella assured Esme, probably talking for Edward since he was obviously still half asleep.

"Okay, good. Do you two have anything planned for today?"

"I think I'll probably just go over my lines," Edward mumbled into his breakfast.

"Lines for what?"

"The school play, I got the part of the main character's best friend yesterday."

Esme clapped her hands and smiled. "Oh, Edward, I didn't know you were trying out for the play. You've never really shown interest in theatre."

"It should be interesting," Edward shrugged, subtly agreeing with his mother.

"Well, make sure to let your father and I know when opening night is," Esme said as she began to gather her things.

Edward nodded, but didn't look at her. "Of course."

"No parties tonight?" Esme wondered. Edward was used to this question being asked every weekend, if not on Fridays then on Saturdays. His mom knew that Edward was the big man on campus and got invited to all the parties. Edward would know if there was a something was going on in town or in Port Angeles, and he usually went to all of them. Parties were the times to get drunk with his friends and laugh about it the next day.

"Not that I know of," he said.

"If you do end up going out tonight make sure to call me," Esme said.

Edward rolled his eyes. "You know I will."

Esme left then, but not before kissing Edward on the head. Sometimes Edward was sure that Esme believed that he was still seven. He was never annoyed by it, however, because he knew how easily his mom got worried, and he couldn't blame her. Sometimes Edward got angry, not at her, but at himself because he was the reason that Esme stressed so often.

A pale hand reaching for the orange juice interrupted Edward's thoughts. Isabella was sitting cross-legged on the chair, wisps of her brown hair falling from her bun. He didn't mean to be weird, staring at her like this, but he could not help it. Even as she used her eyes to ask if he wanted juice, he felt like she was speaking to him. They didn't talk, and it was almost like they didn't need to. Just sitting there, inches away from her, he could feel her energy tingling onto his skin. Edward had never experienced this before with other girls, but then again, Isabella was not like other girls.

"I could help you with your lines, you know," Isabella said.

"Really?" Edward turned to her.

She nodded, her eyes down. "I mean, I'm not that great of an actor but I'll help you if you need it. Not," She added. "That you need the help."

"That would be great, thanks," He said, giving her a small smile. "I'll just run upstairs and get my script."

"Okay."

After placing his dishes in the sink, Edward quickly grabbed the black kit from the drawer and took it upstairs. He was pretty sure Isabella didn't catch him, because she was eating her cereal with her eyes cast down like she was in deep thought. His feet prodded along the cold floors as he ran up the stairs and down the hallway. It didn't occur to him that he forgot the script inside his car until he was already in his room.

_Son of a bitch, _he thought after mentally slapping himself in the face.

He opened the black kit and tried to sort his mind. If he continued on the pace he was at, he would be walking out of the house without pants on. Edward tried to calm himself, repeating that Isabella was only downstairs, and even though he was still on the adrenaline from last night, he could not just jump out and land one on her mouth. He promised to take it slow with her, and so it shall be. Edward wasn't used to girls wanting to go slow with him, but he didn't feel the same way for those girls as he did Isabella. What he felt was unsure to him, it was foreign, so he was following it blindly. But shit, everything about Isabella was foreign to him. He didn't know how to act around her sometimes, not knowing if he had crossed a line or if he was too distant. She was so hard to read and, weirdly, that attracted him.

Edward shook his arm while zipping the kit shut. He then made his way back downstairs, where Isabella was now sitting on the couch. She looked up when he bounded the last step, her eyes both excited and nervous.

"I forgot my script in the car. I'll be right back," Edward said sheepishly as he put the kit back in the drawer as discreetly as possible.

A quiet laugh escaped from Isabella. "Already forgetting your responsibility to the theatre, I see."

Edward rolled his eyes. "Ha-ha."

He slipped on his shoes and decided to just book it to his car. Mornings in Forks' were chilly but, honestly, Edward didn't give a fuck. Isabella was waiting for him in his living room and he didn't have time to put on a coat. Either that, or he was just lazy. Edward liked to think that it wasn't the latter. However, when he opened the door a cold wind embraced him and he swore. _Fuck it. _Edward ran to his car and pressed on the unlock button on his key. When he approached his car, he could see the script sitting in the backseat and he sighed. The script seemed so small compared to everything else in life, but it was also just as much as an addition to his stress. Okay, that was sort of a lie. Edward wasn't necessarily stressed; he just had a lot of things on his plate. It didn't help that he over-analyzed more than he should, but if that was a form of stress, then yes, Edward was stressed. And damn it, he needed to get control of it.

Edward opened the back door and leaned in to grab the script and once it was in his hand, he looked up. In his line of vision was his neighbor's house – Isabella's house. It was strange, looking at it now. Before all of this ever happened, he always just saw the house for what it was, just a house. A home people lived in and did family things together. Sort of like his. Now he saw it as a façade, a lie. The Swans' did not do family things, and while they did live, they did not live _peacefully. _Before Isabella, Edward didn't really acknowledge the existence of a disoriented family, mostly because the Cullen dynamic was so different. Isabella tried to be conspicuous about her house, but Edward sometimes caught her. In order to get to Edward's house, they had to pass hers – there was no other way around it. Isabella would always look anywhere else but at her house. She would fiddle with her fingers and bite her lip, which indicated her anxiety … indicated another memory of her life there.

He could see his breath as he jogged back to the front door. The dew kissed his cheeks and all he could think about was how cold the wind was as it swept across his bare arms. When he finally made it to the veranda, he pushed through the door and sighed. The heat tickled his skin. He could hear someone humming, and he knew it was Isabella. Edward had never heard her hum before, let alone sing a song, and it surprised him to hear it now. Isabella's voice sounded like a morning after a storm – bright and quiet.

Her humming stopped when Edward rounded the corner to the living room. She was sitting on the couch with her legs crossed. "Took you long enough."

"It only took my three minutes, you're just impatient," Edward replied. ""Besides, it's cold as shit outside."

Isabella rolled her eyes. "Excuses, excuses."

Edward chuckled under his breath as he collapsed onto the couch beside Isabella. Their playful banter reminded him of how heated their conversations used to be. To see Isabella smile and laugh because of something he said made him want to erase the past. He did not want to remember those arguments when he and Isabella joked around.

Joked around … Damn, they had come a long way.

"What are you thinking about?" Isabella asked.

_You_.

"A lot of things," Edward said, instead. "Nothing you need to worry about."

"You know by saying that, you're making me curious."

Edward flipped the script to the first page. "Let's get started."

From the corner of his eye, he could see that Isabella hesitated before complying. He was glad that she understood that he wanted to change the subject. Edward could have told her what he was thinking – he already revealed his feelings for her last night, and she seemed to have felt the same way. Well, they shared a kiss, three even, and she didn't complain. Of course he would be thinking of her. Edward could have told her that. However, that was easier said than done because even though Isabella knew what Edward now thought of her, it just made him more nervous. Shit, he didn't know what about Isabella that made him get so worked up. It was almost like a game-changing moment, except he didn't exactly know when that moment was. No girl had ever made him feel like he had to work for her adoration, and maybe that was when the rules of the game changed.

She was sitting closer to him now – he could feel her energy buzz along the surface of his skin. Isabella was so close that all Edward had to do was turn his head and press his lips to hers. Her hair, which smelled of flowers and soap, cascaded over her shoulders and fell to his arm. Edward felt the urge to take a long strand and hold it between his fingers, admire its softness.

"Where do you want to begin?" Isabella asked.

"Uh," Edward cleared his throat. "Right here, I guess."

"So I'll be playing …" Isabella squinted at the name. "Landon?"

"Well I'm only talking to that character in this scene so I suppose so."

"Okay."

"Are you sure you're okay with helping me?" Edward asked. "I mean, you don't have to – "

Isabella rolled her eyes. "I already said it was fine. The question is whether you're okay with it, _Robbie._"

Her tone was playful, and Edward took it as an initiative to begin. Mrs. McGrath had been disappointed when he auditioned for the role of Robbie, the best friend, but he just wasn't ready to be the lead in the school play. As much as he tried to convince Isabella that he was ready to leave his old rep behind, he was still trying to convince himself. It felt good to finally let others know he got good grades and wasn't as pretentious as he made himself to be, but becoming the lead in the _school play_, fuck, that would be social suicide. Literally. He couldn't simply go from the top of the ladder to the bottom – he wouldn't be able to fathom it.

Still, he couldn't deny that he liked acting – the ability to mold into a character and live their life instead of his. Even if it was just for an hour or so, it was a break and he was grateful. Not to mention he was fucking good at it. Isabella, not so much. They must have been going over his lines for twenty minutes, maybe even longer. Edward stopped checking the time.

It amazed him how bad of an actor she was. She read from the script so mechanically and monotonously, all without the slightest of emotion. He wondered how she was able to keep a secret as tragic as hers for all those years and have no one suspect her of anything. Maybe it was because no one paid her attention until now, though he could only speak for himself. He seemed to notice a lot of things about her all of a sudden. As she 'acted' he watched the way her mouth would wrap around the words, and he couldn't help but feel transfixed. Before he even realized what he was doing, he leaned in and kissed her.

When he was around her, his body always seemed to have control before his mind could even process it. He could tell that she was surprised from how still she was, and he was about to pull away when she brought her fingertips to his face. Her gentle touch was all he needed to put his hands on her hips and pull her closer. He had kissed many girls before, and he usually didn't need to think about it to know what felt good, but with her it was different. He wanted to make sure that she was okay with it, that she knew that he wouldn't do anything she wasn't comfortable with. His plan was to let her take the initiative because he would be perfectly content with whatever he could get. So when she moved her hands and wrapped her arms around his neck, deepening the kiss, he knew that she was telling him that she wanted more.

_Okay, _he thought, _you want more? I'll fucking give you more._

With their lips moving together, he laid her down on her back. He kept one hand on her hip, not daring to move it up or down, and placed the other on her cheek. A lock of her hair laced between his fingers. It tickled her and she giggled with their mouths still pressed together – that made him smile.

They stayed like that, him on top of her with her hands on his back, kissing. It was glorious, and Edward didn't think anything else could be better than that. His phone vibrated, telling him he had a text. He ignored it because he had better things to attend to, but then it continued to vibrate and Edward knew that something was going down, and he had a feeling that he knew what it was. But still, he ignored it because he was fucking making out with Isabella. However, Isabella could not ignore it and she pulled away.

"Aren't you going to answer that?" She asked, her eyes looking into his.

Edward shook his head and leaned in for another kiss. "I can do it later."

Just then, he received another text and Isabella pulled away again. "Just answer it, Edward. It must be pretty important."

He definitely did _not _want to answer it – he would rather return to what they were doing before, but he had a feeling that Isabella wanted him to do it. As much as she seemed to enjoy their make out session, she was still Isabella and she was shy. No matter how many times she tried to prove that she wasn't, she just was. Edward promised to take things to her pace, and now he kind of regretted it. All he wanted to do was take her to his room, but neither of them were ready for that. Kissing was no problem; making out was a piece of cake. But sex? Shit. He got goose bumps just thinking about it. He had done it once and he didn't even remember it.

Edward pulled out his iPhone and unlocked it to read the text message. He scoffed a little when he saw whom it was from because he _was _right. He had been waiting for this text message for almost a year, but lately it hardly crossed his mind.

"What is it?" Isabella asked.

"There's a party tonight," Edward replied.

"Whose?"

"Paul Harper."

"I remember him. He was an awful person – always throwing things at the back of my head," Isabella scowled, and then looked at Edward with a shrug. "You can go if you want to. I have to do some homework anyways."

Edward scrolled through all of the other text messages he had received and chuckled. "It looks like you were invited too."

Isabella raised an eyebrow. "Huh?"

"Everyone has been sending me texts demanding me to bring you. And apparently Paul got the same thing, so he asked me to invite you."

"Are you serious right now?"

"I'm fucking serious."

"Wow," Isabella said incredulously. "I'm both shocked and disgusted. Shocked that people want me to go, and disgusted because they only want me there since you and I are friends now."

Edward looked at her through his lashes. "Just friends?"

This made Isabella roll her eyes. "You know what I mean. And besides, I'm still not going."

"Why not?"  
"Did you not hear my 'shocked and disgusted' speech?"

"I heard you," Edward said. "But, Isabella, getting invited to Paul Harper's party is _huge. _And it's actually fun."

"Easy for you to say," Isabella retorted. "You're a party guy."

He shook his head. "Not necessarily. And besides, I'll be there. I'll be with you the whole time, if that makes you feel any better."

"Only a little," Isabella folded her hands into her lap. "Maybe I should ask Alice if she'd come. At least then I'll know more than one person I can stand."

"Okay, deal. Text her, call her, whatever. We're going to leave soon because he lives in Port Angeles."

"Sure. And oh, " She added. "What should I wear?"

Edward looked at Isabella, _really looked at her. _Her deep brown eyes locked with his and he smiled. "Just dress like yourself – you're beautiful." Isabella cast her eyes down and just before her hair fell in her face, he caught of a glimpse of a blush. As she got up from the couch and headed upstairs, all Edward could think of was how the beat of his heart had never felt so wonderful until then.

**x x x x x x**

The car was still moving, even when Edward turned off the engine. It was the bass. It could be heard and felt from where they were, which was two blocks away from Paul's house. Paul had a party once a year, and hell, it probably took twelve months to recover from the last. Edward met Paul in freshman year, when Paul was a sophomore at Forks High. Paul got expelled that year for putting vodka in his water bottle almost everyday and storing weed in his locker. His parents moved to Port Angeles and enrolled him in a private school there – a way to get him away from the "bad influences" in Forks. To be honest, Paul's parents wasted their time and money. By moving, Paul's connections expanded and his rebellion increased. However, such connections and rebellion allowed him to throw a hell of a party while his parents were away on their annual European trip.

"How was he able to get strobe lights at his house?" Isabella said into Edward's ear. They were nearing the party and he couldn't hear much besides the blasting music. They were close, but the lights could be seen miles away.

"Honestly, I have no idea. Knowing Paul, there's probably more surprises," he replied.

Isabella wrapped her arms across her chest. "I heard he was pretty spontaneous," Edward watched as her eyes trailed up and down the house, already scattered with sloppy drunks in the front yard. "I guess I heard right."

Edward nodded his head, and as Isabella kept talking, he continued. It wasn't because he was being a dick, he always wanted to hear what Isabella had to say, it was just that he couldn't hear shit all. The music was so loud that he wasn't sure if he could ever hear the same. He and Isabella pushed through a bunch of people before they made it to the front door. He felt Isabella grab his arm as he pushed through the door. His eyes went straight to the table of empty red solo cups and the guy who said something too quiet for Edward to hear.

"What?" Edward yelled, slightly leaning the side of his head to the guy.

"A dollar per cup," He yelled back. Edward had never met him before, but then again, Paul knew more people than he did. Which was kind of saying a lot. This guy was tall and burly with red hair and freckles. His shirt read 'Got Milf?' and all Edward could do was laugh as he handed over his dollar. He was ready to pay for Isabella when the guy stopped him. "Don't worry about it. This one's on me."

Handing her the cup, Isabella replied with a sarcastic tone. "Wow, a free plastic cup. You're a charmer."

"I'm Luke," He said with too big of a smile.

"Um, goodbye, Luke," Isabella said uneasily and turned away quickly. Edward took her hand and pulled her closer to him, shooting Luke a glare.

_Yeah, good fucking bye, Luke._

With Isabella by his side, Edward made sure that she would be okay. With her wandering eyes and lip biting, he felt sort of guilty for asking her to come. People were smoking god knows what and dancing on the tables. There were about five games of beer pong scattered all around the first floor. There were already people passed out on the stairs and on the balcony. This was not Isabella's scene, but Edward only wanted to show her that she could still be with him in his world. He had been practically isolated because he had been consumed with Isabella and her essence, but now it was time to have some fun. And shit, it wouldn't kill him to have some alcohol in his system.

"Do you want a drink?" He said into her ear.

Feeling her nod she replied, "Please." Her answer made him grin and he brought her over to the keg. She handed him her cup and he filled it up a little more than half way. He hardly filled his cup at all. "Why so little?"

"I'm the designated driver, remember?"

"I seem to recall you driving us here."

"Now you're just being a smart ass," Edward said, making Isabella laugh. She opened her mouth to say something but closed it when a group of people Edward knew from school passed by.

"_Oh my _God. _Edward brought Isabella here, this should be interesting …"_

"_Either she's really good in bed or she's pretty awesome …"_

"_She's actually nice, you know. We have French together …"_

"_I saw her with Edward at the diner yesterday – do you think they have a thing? ..."_

"_Maybe we should get to know her too …"_

Edward rolled his eyes at them once they were out of his sight. He turned back to Isabella only to see that she was downing her beer. She clicked her tongue and wrinkled her nose when she was finished. "Slow down there," He said.

"I need another drink," Isabella decided after taking a quick glance at her empty cup. She made her way to the keg and filled her cup, this time to the rim. After taking another swig, she shook her head. "People are disgusting. They only want the newest thing in hopes of either maintaining or climbing to the top of the social ladder. And apparently, I'm the shiny new toy. _Pathetic._"

"And getting drunk will not make you feel better, because I can tell you right now that in a couple of hours you will feel awful."

"I'm well aware of how alcohol works, Edward."

"Okay, well if you just want to go home we can leave…"

"No," Isabella said. "No, you wanted to come here. I know that you have been looking forward to this party for a while, so I'll stay until you want to leave. Besides, I think I see Alice."

"Isabella – "

"_Bella!_" A voice called from behind him. He turned to see it was Alice, her petite self making her way through the crowd towards them.

"You see?" Isabella said. "Alice is here, I'll be fine."

"Cullen," Alice said to Edward, which seemed to be routine whenever they met.

"Alice," Edward greeted. "Is Emmett here?"

"Yeah, I think he's out in the yard. He and Blondie got into a fight last night and he's trying to avoid her."

Edward nodded his head. "I'll see you later then, 'kay? My cell phone is on if you need me…"

"I'll be fine, Edward," Isabella rolled her eyes. "I have Alice, remember?"

"Yeah, she has me, remember?" Alice repeated. "Seriously, asshole. Go find my brother before I personally shove you out myself."

"Okay, okay," He laughed. And before he knew what he was doing, he leaned in and gave Isabella a quick peck on the lips. When he pulled back he smiled sheepishly. "See ya."  
"Um, okay," Isabella replied, her cheeks flaming and her eyes surprised. However, he could tell from the way the corner of her lips twitched that she was trying not to smile. He gave her one last glance before turning around and making his way to the yard, in which he heard Alice shriek: "Bella Swan, explain yourself _now_!"

In any other situation, Edward would have laughed. As he sifted through people he caught glimpses of their expressions – shock and disbelief. He didn't know what the fuck had come over him when he kissed Isabella. He pretty much just told everyone that something was going on between them, and for once, Edward didn't feel comfortable in the spotlight. This time, he was sharing it with Isabella, and he didn't want the burden of keeping up with expectations on her shoulders. He dealt with it because he was used to it. He wanted to protect Isabella from this because she had already gone through more shit than what was imaginable. Too bad he was a fucking idiot and screwed up his own plan.

He did his best to ignore Paul's guests, and for the most part it worked. After a couple of moments they returned to their own conversations and continued to gulp down their alcohol. Oh, how desperately did Edward want to get wasted, but he brought Isabella with him tonight and he had to make sure that she got home safely. Edward threw his cup into the trash and stepped through the back door. Cool, wet, air lightly hit Edward's skin; he was only wearing jeans and a white t-shirt, and he desperately wished that he brought a jacket.

As Edward scanned the yard for Emmett, he noticed that there were significantly more people this time than previous years. There were particularly more girls. There were a group of them lounging by the pool, a group of football guys from Forks trying to get them to strip and take a dive. Amongst those shitheads was Ben Cheney, which, Edward thought, wasn't the least surprising. Last year, he would have been laughing as those jerks egged on the girls, but now he only shook his head. He recognized the girls from the diner, the ones who he thought had been pretty and was grateful that they gave him such a great tip. It was the same three girls, two brunettes and the blonde. The two brunettes laughed with the boys, obviously flirting and teasing them. The blonde one, however, had her eyes on Edward. She wiggled her fingers at him as a 'hello' and bit her lip. All Edward could do was give her a half smile without looking at her. He felt uncomfortable because she wasn't Isabella.

Edward walked away from the scene and continued looking for Emmett. His search got interrupted more than once by people he knew from school, and some by people he hardly remembered from parties' prior. Trying not to be a complete dick, he politely excused himself from each conversation. It had gotten colder the longer Edward tried to find Emmett, and he was about to go back inside when a clap on the shoulder made him turn around.

"Dude," Edward said, his heart racing from shock. "You scared the shit outta me."

Emmett laughed and put his hands up, one holding his plastic cup, in the air almost as in defense. "Sorry. But bro, I've been looking everywhere for you, all the while trying to hide from Rosalie."

"Yeah, Alice told me about that. What happened?"

"I don't even know," Emmett shook his head. "One minute we were making out and shit, and the next she starts yelling at me for asking what was up with you and her. All she had to do was tell me that she didn't want to talk about it."

"Well, that's Rose for you," Edward said, putting his arm around his friend. "But luckily for you, I'm avoiding her as well. So let's have a good time, yeah?"

"Hell yeah! But where the shit is your drink?"

"I threw it out."

"Why the fuck would you do that?" Emmett laughed incredulously. "You know what? Never mind. You can have some of mine."

"Thanks," Edward chuckled as he took the cup out of Emmett's hand and brought it to his lips. "But I can't get drunk, I'm driving Isabella home."

**x x x x x x**

Edward was most definitely wasted. Like, drunk off his fucking ass wasted. He was laying down on something soft, yet scratchy. Grass, maybe? He didn't really know, but it made him laugh. Emmett was beside him, and he only knew that from how loud he was laughing. It made Edward chuckle again, and he realized that Emmett should probably be a comedian someday. He was so fucking funny that he even made himself laugh.

Okay, okay. Edward wasn't as drunk as he had been an hour ago. He wanted to think that he was sobering up nicely, but to be honest he was still out. Edward didn't even know how it happened. He had been sharing with Emmett, but by the time Edward and Emmett were on their fourth cup, his logic was slipping and the vodka being passed to him seemed pretty fantastic. Edward laughed again – it was better than fantastic, it was _the shit._

Slowly, his eyes began to close and his laughing ceased. Emmett was gone, but Edward didn't give a shit. He just wanted to sleep …

**x x x x x x**

"Edward?" Someone said his name, shaking his shoulders. "Edward, wake up."

He moaned. "Ugh. What?"

"Hey, asshole. Wake the fuck up. Bella needs to go home."

At the sound of her name, and the way he was being addressed, Edward opened his eyes. "Alice?" She was hovering over him with tired eyes. Her breath smelled of alcohol. Her words began to sink in and he sat up too fast – his head began to swim. "Where is she?"

"Don't worry, she's inside. Emmett's with her right now," Alice helped Edward get up. She was a lot stronger than she appeared to be. "She's drunk and …"

"You let her get drunk?" Edward narrowed his eyes. "Alice, I told you to take care of her."

"And I did," Alice retorted, returning the glare. "She's drunk, not naked and dancing on top of a table."

He rolled her eyes. "Just take me to her."

"Fine."

If Alice had been drunk earlier, it didn't show. She was walking fine and was completely aware of her surroundings. Unlike Edward, who was stumbling over his own feet here and there. Alice laughed a couple of times, which annoyed Edward. He wasn't used to being the center of embarrassment. She held him up, however, which Edward appreciated. They eventually made it inside, where it seemed the party only got louder and wilder. Shit, it was a gong show. He finally saw Paul, who was leaning against the counter and talking to a girl. He raised his eyes and caught sight of Edward, giving him a wave and the cocky smile he always had. Edward nodded at him quickly.

"There she is," Alice yelled over the music.

Edward saw her with her back against the wall, Emmett holding her up by her shoulder. She was laughing and covering her face, and Emmett didn't seem to get the joke. Isabella was beyond drunk, and Edward groaned. "Holy shit. How did she get so bad?"

"You think _this_ is bad? You should have seen her earlier."

"I don't even want to know," he shook his head. He put his hands on Isabella's shoulders. "Okay, Isabella, it's time to go home."

"_Noooooo_," Isabella mumbled. "I'm having _such _a great time."

"I know you are, but it's time to go home."

"Ugh, fine," She pouted.

Edward said his goodbyes to Emmett and Alice, who only waved with concerned eyes for Isabella. He held her by the waist and led her out of the house. She was leaning on him for support and started talking non-sense. Literally. Edward had no fucking clue what she was saying to him. Her hair was falling in her face and he constantly tucked it behind her ear. She smelled very much like tequila and her makeup was beginning to smear. Once they were outside and began retreating from the house, Edward said into her ear. "Let's go for a little walk."

"Is it because … um, because you're drunk?" Isabella asked.

"Not nearly as drunk as you are."

"I'm not drrr … I'm not though," Isabella then laughed. "'Kay, maybe I am."

"I'm glad you realize that. There's some water in my car."

She nodded her head against his chest. "We're just a drunk ol' couple, aren't we?"

At that, Edward had to laugh. Isabella would not remember this in the morning, but he would never forget it. "Yeah, I guess we are."

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**Yes, I'm alive! You can call off the ambulance!**

**I know it's been more than two months since my last update, and for that I am so sorry. If you've been a reader of my work for a while, you would probably know that April-June are my busiest months. It's usually because that's when I have dance competitions, but this year especially since I'm graduating in a week, and because I now have a job. However, you guys have been so patient and have been sending me encouraging messages and that honestly makes me smile. Hopefully this chapter was worth the wait.**

**Also! I finished City of Lost Souls ... HOLY CRAP. Since there are people who haven't read/finished it, I will avoid spoilers. But, shit. Okay. Cassie Clare is responsible for the therapy I will probably need. And to learn that the next book doesn't come out until 2014. Sigh. My heart can't take it.**

**Anyways, let me know what you think of this chapter :) **

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**Karina.**


	24. Chapter Twenty Four: Trust

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a banana ... which I am eating at the moment ... because I'm hungry. Yolo. That's right - I said it.

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_But if you hold tight, shadows will be lost in the light._

_Oh cos sometimes, fate and your dreams will collide._

_So don't walk away from me._

**_Holes Inside - Joe Brooks_**

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Chapter Twenty-Four: Trust

_**Bella**_

Bella was awake, though she wished she wasn't. She thought by keeping her eyes shut that she would be able to go back to sleep, however, she could not ignore how _awful_ she was feeling. Her head ached and her stomach flopped. Bella just didn't feel right – she knew what she was thinking, but it didn't sound correct. Like everything about her was just off. She gave up trying to fall back to sleep, opening her eyes to the painful sunlight that shown through … through the car windows? Bella was sitting in the passenger seat of Edward's car and, as she ran a hand through her hair, she wondered why she spent the night there. Soft, even breathing beside her made her turn her head. It was Edward, with his head leaning against the steering wheel, one arm slung on top and another hanging out the open window.

Bella noticed that they weren't parked outside of the Cullen's home. Hell, they weren't even in Forks.

Anxious, Bella tapped Edward on the shoulder. He didn't seem to notice it at all, so Bella punched him right in the arm, in which he yelped and accidentally hit the car horn. The sound pierced through her head and she covered her ears. Damn, that was painful.

"What the hell?" Edward said, his voice thick with sleep. "Why did you punch me?"

Bella rubbed her temples, trying to ease the pain. "You weren't waking up."

"What time is it?"

"Um, morning."

"No shit," He laughed, now looking at her with tired eyes. Edward pulled his wrist up and glanced at his watch. "It's just after seven. What do you think we should do? Get breakfast, or just go home?"

"How about we get some Advil, and then decide?" Bella said as she dropped her face into her hands.

A chuckle escaped from Edward. "Got yourself a pretty bad hangover, I see."

"I feel like death."

Edward then leaned over her and opened the glove compartment. Bella suddenly felt a rush of warmth as he practically put most of his weight on her, though it was quickly replaced with nausea. "I should have something in here. Oh," He pulled out a tiny bottle of Advil and handed it to Bella, closing the glove compartment and returning to his position in the driver's seat. "There it is. I always have it with me, just in case."

Holding the bottle in her hand, she gave Edward a small smile. "Thanks." She found the bottle of water she had been drinking from before the party. After taking a pill, she swallowed it down with the lukewarm water and took notice of how dry her mouth was. She probably needed a good toothbrush. "How about you?"

"What _about_ me?" Edward asked, pulling on a pair of sunglasses. She wished she had a pair to shield her eyes from the blinding morning light.

"How do you feel?"

He shrugged. "Pretty shitty, but obviously not as bad as you. I can only assume that it's because you had a ton more to drink than I did."

Bella let out a bitter laugh. "Yeah, that was pretty stupid."

"Who told you that alcohol was never the answer?" Edward pointed to himself and gave a righteous grin. "This guy."

"Just drive." Bella rolled her eyes.

Edward chuckled and started the engine, poking his head out the open window to see it was clear before he started forward. Bella opened the window slightly, letting the cool air hit her face. She closed her eyes and sighed. She truly felt like crap, and she hoped that the Advil would take effect soon. It was going to be a long day, and as much as she wanted to sleep, she knew she couldn't. She felt too awful to get comfortable. Bella shifted in her seat every couple minutes, trying to ignore her hangover but, mostly, the events that happened before everything turned blurry.

After Edward had left, Alice immediately attacked her with questions. Not that Bella minded the peck on the lips – in fact, she wanted more. Especially after the way they kissed earlier that day. It left Bella warm inside and, though she would never admit it to anyone, Edward was _really _good at kissing. She now understood why the girls at school always swooned over him. She herself was still swooning. Even the quick kiss he gave her left her flustered. Obviously Alice saw the effect left on her, that girl didn't miss much.

Alice had squealed. "Oh my _God_! Did that just happen?" Well, duh, it just happened. Bella hadn't been expecting it, but she was pleasantly surprised. Alice then squealed again. "I didn't know you liked him!" Neither did Bella, until Friday night. "Holy shit, you guys totally have a thing, don't ya?" Then Alice's face got serious. "Why didn't you tell me how you felt about him, Bella? I would have been _so _much nicer to him, had I known."

"I didn't tell you because I didn't know, until last night," Bella had replied. "You know I would have. Actually, I was going to tell you _now_, but that just happened and …"

"Bella, chill. I'm not mad. It's just going to take a little while to get used to it. And hey, if it makes you feel any better, I'll try being nice to the asshole. Sound good?"

"That's all I ask."

"Great," Alice then smiled with a spark in her eye. "Now let's have some fun."

Bella had groaned. "I don't know if I like the sound of that, Alice."

Ignoring her hesitation, Alice linked her arm with Bella's and led them to the kitchen counter, where it seemed that the majority of the hard liquor was located. Grabbing tequila, she poured some into each of their cups. "Shots, shots, shots!"

Her eventful night began as the deep orange liquid burned her throat and loosened her mind.

"Are you alright?" Edward asked, parking into an empty slot in front of a diner. It reminded her a lot of Forks' diner, though this one was more cabin-like, all wood and grass, with the name 'Jim's Place' as the only commercial aspect. "Isabella?"

Blinking away her thoughts, she nodded. "Sorry. I'm just feeling awful."

"That's why I brought us here. You need some grease inside of you."

Bella cringed. "That doesn't make me feel any better."

"Trust me, it will. Now come on," Edward grabbed hold of her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze before letting go and opening the car door. "Let the hangover reme_dies_ – plural, because it might take a few methods to bring you back to one hundred percent – begin."

"Anything to get rid of this pounding headache," Bella said as she pushed open the door, though she knew that what she had said was a double standard. In the corner of her eye, she saw Edward watch her carefully. He knew that she was hiding something, and she quickly looked down to her feet, letting her hair fall and cover her face. This was how close they had grown – he could simply _tell _when something was wrong with her when she even told a half-truth. Bella wondered if she could read Edward as easily as he had learned to read her.

Once she was side by side with Edward, he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and she leaned her head into him. It surprised her how comfortable she was with him now that they were … well, whatever they were. They hadn't put a label on their new relationship, and Bella was fine with that. She needed to sort some stuff out, especially after last night. She needed to keep her priorities straight and not let herself get tangled up in something that might not last.

"Shit," Bella mumbled.

A nervous expression spread on Edward's face. "Are you gonna throw up?"

"What? No." She laughed, making Edward's hold on her shoulders relax. "I just realized that we didn't go home last night."

"You only realized that _now_?"

"Shut up. I meant that I realized that we didn't make it home last night, therefore broke curfew, which means your mom is going to have our heads."

"Oh, don't worry about it. I called my parents last night and told them we had something to drink and they told me just to sleep in the car and make sure you were comfortable. They were totally cool about it."

Bella scratched her head. "Really?"

Edward shook his head. "No, they want to rip me a new one for: a, letting you drink and, b, getting drunk myself." Edward probably sensed that Bella was getting anxious and began to rub her arm. "Don't worry, they're not mad at you. Me on the other hand, well, I'm pretty much fucked."

"Well it's partially my fault that we had to sleep in your car …"

"Hey, Isabella, don't stress. The worst that's probably going to happen to me is that they'll make me stay in for a weekend and lock up my motorcycle. Actually, now that I think about it, that fucking sucks. The weather was supposed to be nice for a couple of days."

"You have a motorcycle?" Bella wondered. She never saw him riding one before, not that she really paid that much attention to him before now.

A grin pulled on the corner of Edward's mouth, as if just the thought of his bike sparked something inside him. "I'll take you on it sometime."

Before she could even respond, the host, who had greasy brown hair and freckles and was wearing a green and yellow 'Jim's Place shirt, led them to a booth in the back. The guy looked like he was around their age, and could probably tell that she and Edward weren't feeling too great. Luckily, the diner wasn't too packed – with only an elderly couple holding hands and a girl with pink hair who looked pretty sketchy occupying the other tables – but Bella was grateful nonetheless. She felt like she needed this time with Edward before they got home, because she had a feeling that shit was probably going to go down once they arrived. She had a few things to tell Edward about last night, and every second spent not telling him ate at her with anxiety.

She pulled at her sleeves so that they covered most of her hands. She wasn't cold, she just felt like she needed to hide herself from something. Her eyes wandered the cabin-like feel that started from the outside of the diner and continued inside. Wooden ceiling tops and floors, even the walls were the same deep mahogany and were proudly displaying animal heads (though she wished they weren't real). Most restaurants smelled of the food being cooked, but Jim's Place smelled like someone had left the window open during a rainfall – fresh and piney. It reminded her of the woods in Forks, the one she ran off in after she read Charles' letter. While that memory usually brought disturbing chills, this time she relaxed. Sometimes she forgot that Edward was the one who found her, and that thought brought her warmth. Looking at Edward now, his auburn hair that stuck out in awkward places, deep emerald eyes that looked like they could use a few more hours of sleep, and pink lips that once said horrible things to her but now said nothing but the sweetest. He had looked better before, but she didn't mind seeing him like this now. This Edward wasn't afraid to just be himself, and that was all Bella wanted from him.

Again, Bella pulled on her sleeves, hoping that Edward wouldn't freak when she told him about what happened last night. At least, she hoped that he wouldn't react the way she did last night, though, she was sure they wouldn't serve him alcohol as he already looked drunk enough.

Edward was skimming through the menu when he suddenly said: "I recommend the Big Breakfast Special."

"Huh?" She said, her eyes meeting his as her mind came back into focus.

"The Big Breakfast Special, AKA, the best hangover cure known to Port Angeles." He set down the menu and tilted his head slightly. "You're really out of it. What's on your mind?"

Bella sighed, about to tell him everything when their waiter arrived. She was a woman who looked to be in her thirties – with blonde ringlets and bright red lipstick. She pursed her lips before asking: "What can I get you kids?"

She was looking at Bella first, asking for her order first. "Uhh …"

"Two Big Breakfast Specials," Edward answered for her, in which she was relieved. "And two _huge _glasses of water."

The woman, who was wearing the same 'Jim's Place' t-shirt as the host, smirked as she scribbled the order onto her notepad. "Crazy night?" Edward only chuckled in response, and Bella blushed. "'Kay, kids. I'll be back with your waters."

"Damn, now it's _really _hitting me," Edward groaned into his hands as the waitress left.

Bella scoffed. "Edward, that's how I've been feeling since I woke up. Man up."

"You're right, you're right," He nodded, folding his hands and placing them under his chin. He watched her with tired eyes. "We're so stupid."

"I've never partied so hard in my life."

_Not,_ she thought to herself, _that I have ever partied before._

"Stick with me, and it most definitely will not be the fucking last."

"Okay," Bella said. "But can the next time be a while away? I don't want to feel this bad for a long, long time."

Edward laughed. "It's a deal, Isabella."

Talking to Edward made Bella feel slightly better, not physically, but mentally. However, this lighter feeling was shortsighted – for it reminded her of what lead her to this morning and why her hangover was as bad as it was.

"Isabella, what aren't you telling me?" He asked.

She was shocked that Edward could tell that Bella was keeping something from him. "What do you mean?"

"I'm not stupid," Edward said. Bella had to control herself from rolling her eyes from this statement. "I sensed that something happened last night the moment I woke up. There's something eating at you."

"How do you suddenly know me so well?" She laughed bitterly.

"Living with the same person for a period of time can do that to you," He replied, softening his face and lowering his voice. "Please don't be afraid to tell me things, Isabella. It physically hurts knowing that I can't help you when you're obviously worrying over something."

Bella felt her heart flutter at his words, and she grabbed his hand over the table with a small smile. "All of this is new to me, Edward – this whole … being with someone and revealing myself. You'll have to be patient with me."

"Okay."

"I'll tell you on the way back to Forks."

Edward smiled and gave Bella's hand a gentle squeeze. "Okay."

Bella didn't realize they were just gazing at each other until the waitress came with their food. They pulled her hands apart as the plates were set on the table. Bella blushed as she found Edward's gaze again, his jewel-green eyes seeming to look into her and accept her flaws and everything that she was. Again, she felt warmth spread across her chest and she blushed more. Edward grinned at her and began to dig into his food. She did the same.

** x**

Telling Edward about what happened last night was most definitely easier said than done. As Bella sat in the car, thinking of different ways to start her story, Edward sat quietly in the driver's seat. He made it seem that he was concentrating on the road, but Bella knew that he was letting her take her time until she was ready to tell him. It wasn't fair to him, that she was taking so long to reveal he stress, but it was so _difficult _to just explain herself. Bella was a little nervous because she wasn't sure how Edward would take it – not like last night was overly scandalous or anything, it just made her feel uneasy enough to get drunk.

She closed her eyes, trying to remember as much as she could about last night. Bella could only remember before she filled her cup, everything that happened in between came up in bits and pieces, and even then it was all a blur. Except for one part – yeah, that part was pretty damn clear.

_Oh hell, _she thought, _just get it over with already. _

"They still haven't found my mom and Phil," She blurted.

Edward didn't speak right away – the way he pursed his lips and furrowed his brows revealed that he was thinking about what to say. Bella realized that Edward constantly did this as to ensure that he wouldn't say the wrong thing, and he did this in front of her especially. The longer he kept still made Bella's chest feel heavy. Maybe she shouldn't have come out with it so abruptly, maybe she should have eased into it. She turned her head to look out the window, trying to distract herself with the copious amounts of green they passed. She glanced up at the sky – dark gray clouds were quickly rolling in.

"Was that why you let Alice get you drunk?" Edward finally said.

"First of all, it wasn't Alice's fault that I got so drunk," Bella, argued, before sighing and shaking her head. "And that's part of the reason, I guess."

"There's more?"

"Yeah, but I'm not sure how you're gonna take it …"

"Isabella," Edward said. "Just tell me."

Bella took a deep breath. "Brant was there – Rosalie brought him. Anyways, after she glared at me and shoved my shoulder Brant made his way over to me," It was subtle, but she noticed that Edward stiffened. "We were just talking, Alice was with me. Then Alice left to go fetch us more drinks, but she didn't come back for a while. That's when he got … touchy."

"_Touchy_?"

"Just hear me out," She ran a hand through her hair. "He got as far as putting his arm around me before I started pulling away, and by then he was getting forceful – grabbing my waist and trying to kiss me. I was pushing him away when Alice came back and saved me. After that I just grabbed whatever bottle I could find and chugged it. I just wanted to forget what happened."

Images of Brant, with his sandy brown hair and violet eyes, forcing himself onto her flooded her mind. She shuddered, taking notice of how silent it was in the car. Bella stole a glance at Edward, who was squeezing the steering wheel so tight that his knuckles were white, his shoulders were tense and his face was expressionless. His eyes, however, held all of his emotion, and Bella could read it as clear as day. He was angry, that she could tell, but at who, she wasn't too sure.

"Say something, Edward."

"What would you want me to say?" He said through clenched teeth.

"Whatever you're thinking, just say it."

"Okay," He muttered, pulling over on the side of the road. After shutting off the engine, he took a deep breath and leaned back on the seat. He didn't even look at her, but instead he looked straight ahead. "I'm going to kill that fucker."

"Edward," Bella frowned. "You wouldn't actually hurt him."  
"Oh, but I will. He shouldn't have done that."

"He was drunk …"

"You're _defending _him, now?"

"No, I'm not." She didn't know how to calm him. "I just don't want you to stoop to that level because I know in the end it won't be satisfying. I don't want anybody getting hurt because of me, especially since – "

She gulped, trying not to cry.

"Okay," Edward nodded, understanding what she meant. "But I just have one question for you."

"Shoot."

"Why didn't you come find me the minute after you escaped?"

"I-I don't know."

"You _don't know_?" Edward said, exasperatedly, shaking his head.

Bella was at a loss of words. Edward got out of the car and slammed the door so hard it made her flinch. She didn't expect him to ask that question, and immediately she felt stupid. In a rush to ensure that he wouldn't do anything ridiculous, Bella got out of the car as well. There was a bite in the air now, and Bella pulled her arms to her chest. Edward was a few paces away from the car, walking back in forth in short strides while he ran a stressed hand through his already messy hair. Slowly, apprehensively, she made her way towards him. Each step towards Edward seemed to make her feel farther away. Bella didn't know what to say, didn't know how he would react.

When she was only a couple of steps away Edward stopped pacing and faced her. "Are you scared of me, Isabella?"

"What? No, of course not," Bella responded, baffled by his question.

"Then why didn't you come to me right away when that asshole started making moves on you?" Bella was about to respond when he shook his head, telling her to shut up. "Don't tell me that you 'don't know' – that's a bullshit answer. I want the truth."

"Edward, I – " She hesitated, not knowing what to say.

"Damn it, why can't you just come out and fucking say it already? You know, you're a real piece of work."

"_I'm _a piece of work?" Bella couldn't believe what was happening, and anger stirred within her. "Don't act like you're all holy and what not, because I know for sure that you don't tell me everything. And why would you? It's not like we were friends before all of this shit. At least I told you what happened last night, I could have easily just kept it to myself, but I didn't. And you know why? Because I actually care for you, Edward. I actually give a crap about how you think of me, and I'm freaking out because … because …"

Bella took a deep breath – she didn't realize that she had begun to cry until her lip quivered. Edward stayed quiet, taking slow steps towards her. She stood her ground – she couldn't find the will to move from her spot.

"I have never actually depended on someone to take care of me. I've always fended for myself. When Phil hurt me, I told not one. It's my instinct, to keep things to myself. The fact that I actually told you what happened is a _huge _step for me. So, yeah, I'm sorry I didn't tell you right away, but at least you know now."

"Isabella …"

"Just, please, don't be mad at me, Edward. I don't really know what I'm doing, but I'm trying. And this is just – "

She couldn't continue, her tears got a hold of her and she buried her face in her hands. To her surprise, she felt Edward wrap his arms around her and hug her tight. He rested his head on the top of her head and began to rub soothing circles on her back.

"Shh," He cooed. "Please don't cry, Isabella. I'm sorry I took my anger out on you."

Bella rested her head against his chest – he smelled of cinnamon and alcohol – and she took a deep breath, one last tear escaping and racing down her cheek.

"I'm new at this, too. This is going to take some time, us, but I'm willing to try if you are."

Bella nodded. "Me, too."

"Good," She could hear the grin in his voice. He took one hand and lifted her chin so that she was looking into his eyes. He then removed his hand and wiped her tears with his thumb. Edward then bent down and brought his lips to hers. It was a tender kiss – his hands on both side of her face with hers on his hips. It didn't become steamy; it was a kiss that said that they were both sorry for what was said and that they were forgiven. It still made her melt, but it also gave her hope that maybe they could work. Edward was right – it was not going to be easy, and they were going to make mistakes. They didn't have a label on their relationship because neither of them knew what they were doing – they only knew that they wanted the same thing.

Pulling apart, Edward brought her right arm up and rolled down her sleeve so that her scar from that night – that night seemed to happen so long ago – was exposed. It wasn't too noticeable anymore, but it was still a reminder of what she almost did.

"I won't let anyone hurt you anymore, Isabella," Edward whispered. "Trust me."

Bella nodded. "I already do."

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**Let's start out with the most important thing that needs to be said: I am so sorry for the ridiculous gap between updates. It's unacceptable, since you all have been patiently waiting for this, and everyday that I could not write I wanted to slap myself in the face. Actually.**

**I'm going to start from when I last updated, which was in May, seven days before my high school graduation. First of all, grad was busy as hell. I had the whole ceremony thing and then the banquet. After that, I had my dance recital(s) (we do three in two days), and that included our little "graduation ceremony", which was really emotional for me because I've been dancing for fourteen years and saying goodbye to my team is not easy. Not too long after that was exams (We have our final exams after grad, which is weird), and gr. 12 exams where I'm from is a pretty major deal. It's worth 50% of our final grade, which meant I had to study pretty hardcore. I passed! Thank the Lord. Anyways right after my last exam, I started a new job. And due to me going to university and all, I needed to work tons to save up. This summer I pretty much had eight hour shifts, five days a week. When I got home, I was too exhausted to write, and on my days off I usually went to see my friends or just relaxed. I was able to write here and there, but not as much as I would have liked to. I know it's the end of summer, and some of you are already back to school and I'll be heading off to university in about two weeks, but I just want to ensure you all that I have not, and will not, give up on this story. It may take a while, when I start school my work schedule will be lessened, I _will_ update. I'm going to make sure I get this story out for you. I love you guys so much, I can't even explain it. Thanks for being so patient with me, and hopefully you liked the chapter. There's still more to come for these two - LOTS more.**

**Again, I love and adore you all.**

**Tell me what you think of this chapter - kind of a filler, but not really. It's just as important as the rest. We get to see a glimpse of how much Edward cares for Bella, and how much he wants to protect her. Not to mention we got to break down another piece of Bella's wall.**

**Hmm, I wonder how long it will take to break down Edwards. *laughs evilly***

**REVIEW, PLEASE AND THANK YOU.**

**Much Love, **

**Karina**


	25. Chapter Twenty Five: Escapade

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. But I do own my own car because my dad decided to buy himself a new one. Doesn't matter, because now I don't have to borrow!

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This slope is treacherous

This path is reckless

This slope is treacherous

And I like it

**_Treacherous - Taylor Swift_**

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**Recap of the last few chapters**: Bella has been abused all her life. She finds out that Phil isn't her real father and that her life has been a lie. Edward finds her in the woods when she tries to commit suicide. Super awkward situation because they hate each other. Edward hates Bella because she supposedly broke Rosalie, his best friend's, heart. Bella claims that she has no idea what he's talking about and Edward, after connecting the dots, realizes that Rosalie lied. Edward doesn't know what Rosalie's game is and is now ignoring her. Rosalie seems to be distraught by this and is taking it out on Emmett. Alice is one of Bella's friends who was right that Rosalie is the devil's spawn (not literally). Edward and Bella make a truce to be civil towards one another, especially because Bella now lives with him. In the process of being civil, Edward realizes he likes Bella. A boy, Brant, also likes Bella. Edward finally kisses Bella. Edward and Bella get drunk at a party. They get hungover which absolutely sucks balls. They argue because Brant tried to kiss Bella that night and Edward got super jealous and what not. They made up and agreed to take things slowly. Edward still has secrets because duuuuuh read the title. BOOM. ENJOY THIS CHAPTER.

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Chapter Twenty-Five: Escapade

_**Bella **_

Bella couldn't believe what was happening – never did she think that Edward's parents had an angry bone in their body, and yet, they were losing their minds and taking it out on both her and Edward. Granted, it _was _their fault that they got wasted last night and couldn't come home, but at least they were alive … or something. Okay, she couldn't even compensate for their actions because in all honesty, what they did was irresponsible and Carlisle and Esme were only being reasonable.

But still, they were scary as hell.

"I just can't _believe_ that you thought it was okay to get so drunk that you couldn't come back home!" Esme exclaimed, baffled.

"At least I called to let you know what happened – it wasn't like I drove drunk. Don't I get some credit?" Edward reasoned, in which he earned glares from his parents.

Carlisle only shook his head. "Drinking is one thing, especially because you're underage, but to go to that boy's party is a whole other thing. I know you two were friends, but Paul Harper has a reputation and the move to Port Angeles clearly hasn't set him straight."

"You've never been mad about me going to Paul's parties before," Edward pointed out.

"Well that's because you've always been reasonable with what time you come home and how much you drink. This time, you obviously didn't take that into consideration," Carlisle argued.

"With that being said," Esme said. "You're grounded – two weeks. No parties, no friends. Just school, and home. No motorcycle."

"What? Are you serious? The weather is supposed to be amazing this week, and I was planning on showing Isabella around with it."

"No excuses," Carlisle stated before turning his gaze to Bella. "The same goes for you, Bella. Now I know you are a guest, but your mother trusted us to take care of you. By doing so, I believe some parenting needs to be done in her absence."

Bella nodded – she had nothing else to say. She kept her eyes down and her hands clasped on her lap. She could feel Edward's energy beside her – he was relaxed on the sofa with his back against the cushions and his arm resting on top, crossing his leg over the other with ease. Bella knew that Edward's stance was a wall masking how he really felt, pissed off and incredulous, but she had a feeling that he wanted to show his parents that they didn't threaten him. Bella wished she could come off as cool and collected as Edward, but she had never done so before. If she had ever done such a thing in front of Phil, he would have hit her for her arrogance.

Esme shook her head before leaving the room with a huff, with Carlisle following silently behind her. The room was silent after they left. Bella didn't know whether to feel awkward or guilty. She let her face fall into her hands and sighed. If she was being honest with herself, she didn't feel bad at all, in fact … she felt relieved.

"Why are you smiling?" Edward asked as Bella pulled her hands away and sat up straighter. "We just got grounded – and worst of all, I can't take you on my motorcycle."

Bella whispered, "That was the _nicest_ punishment I have ever received."

It took a moment for Edward to comprehend what Bella was trying to get at, but once he understood, he scooted closer to her and rested his arm over her shoulders. "I don't know what to say."

"You don't need to say anything," Bella replied. "I'm just surprised I feel this happy over being _grounded_. Normal teenagers wouldn't want to be in our situation."

"Shit, _I_ don't want to be in our situation," Edward joked. "But you're not a normal teenager, Isabella. That's why I find you so interesting. You keep me guessing."

Bella's heart swelled at that, and it made her giggle She leaned into Edward briefly, before they both separated. Edward's parents didn't know about them, and though neither Bella nor Edward spoke of it, it was obvious that they weren't going to tell them, at least not any time soon. Even so, Edward's hand sat dangerously close to Bella's, and she burned to grab it, to link her fingers with his and just stare and think about how right it felt. The thought of even touching him made her tingle. Bella could feel his warmth radiating off of him and she wondered if she had the same effect. Turning her head towards him, she was surprised at their proximity. His green eyes caught hers, and as her breathing became harder and faster, she glanced at his mouth. Edward was leaning in when she quickly looked away.

"Edward," Bella sighed. "Not with your parents in the house."

He nodded his head in agreement. "I know, I know. But I can't help it, okay. Maybe we should get out."

"Did you already forget? We're grounded. If I'm not mistaken, I'm pretty sure it means we can't leave just to make out."

"Make out, huh?" Edward grinned devilishly.

"You know what I mean," Bella said, pushing Edward's shoulder.

Edward chuckled. "I'm joking – well, not really. But anyways, the thing about my parents is that there are always exceptions to the rules of being grounded. One of the greatest exceptions to the rules is academics."

"What are you going to do, ask them if we can go to the library to work on our creative writing assignment?"

"See, you're already so good at it."

Bella rolled her eyes. "I don't think it's going to work."

"Trust me, would ya?"

If Bella had a nickel for every time she heard Edward say that …

"Okay, fine. But you're doing all the talking – I'm a terrible liar."

Edward laughed before getting off the couch and making his way towards the stairs. He gracefully bounded them two at a time. Bella could hear him ask Carlisle and Esme if they could go to the library to work on their project. As she expected, they were hesitant. She pushed herself off the couch and made her way towards the stairs to hear well. Bella stayed at the bottom, not wanting to get too close and ruin their chance at escape. Edward was explaining to them how they had an idea that required them to go to the library, saying something about how the Internet wouldn't have what they were looking for. There was a moment of silence, and Bella thought they denied Edward.

When Edward exited his parents' room, Bella ran up the stairs and stopped until she was one step down from him. "They said no, didn't they?"

Edward shook his head. "What? Hell, no. They said it was fine. The condition is that my dad drops us off and picks us up when we're done." Bella nodded before making her way to her room. "Where are you going?"

"We're going to the library right? I have to get my books."

"But I thought –" Bella winked, before turning around stepping into her room. She heard Edward say, "You always have me guessing."

Knowing that Edward couldn't see her, she bit her lip and tried to stop her heart from exploding. Bella couldn't believe she actually _winked_ – she never had the confidence to do anything like that before. She picked up her backpack and headed out of the room. She met Carlisle in the hallway as he came out of his room with a set of car keys in his hands.

"Ready to go?" He asked.

Bella opened her mouth to respond when she saw Edward coming out of his room with his backpack slung over one shoulder. She turned to Carlisle with a smile. "As ready as I'll ever be."

Edward gave her a mischievous grin, and with that, they followed Carlisle to the car.

** x**

Forks Memorial Library was located on Forks Avenue in downtown. Like Edward, his father drove just as fast. It would normally take about fifteen minutes to get to the library, but Carlisle managed to get them there in less than ten. Since it was a Sunday, the library was fairly busy. It was mostly children with their parents or seniors who were walking in and out – no one from Forks High would be caught dead at the library on a weekend, especially not after Paul's party last night. At least, that's what Bella thought.

"You call me as soon as you got what you need, are we clear?" Carlisle said as he put the gear into park.

"Crystal," replied Edward, who opened the car door and pushed himself out.

Bella followed suit.

The minute Carlisle's car was out of sight, Edward turned to her asked, "What do you want to do first?"

Bella thought about it – there were so many things they could do while they were here. But then she felt guilty for lying to Carlisle and Esme, especially since they let her live with them and treated her like an equal.

"We should probably work on our assignment …"

"Whoa, what?" Edward interrupted. "We're actually doing that? I thought we were gonna have fun."

"Would you let me finish?" Bella rolled her eyes. "I meant that I think we should work on our assignment for a little bit, just so if they ask what we were looking for we can give them a legit answer. After that we can be free to do whatever."

Edward looked like he wanted to kill that idea, but she was right and he knew it. If Carlisle or Esme asked what they were looking for, no matter if the answer was yes or no, they would want to know why they _had _to go to the library. Edward begrudgingly nodded, letting Bella lead the way. It wasn't like she wanted to go to actually do some work – heck, who actually looked forward to starting an assignment on a Sunday. But hey, this entire weekend was filled with firsts – first kiss, first high school party, first drink, first time being wasted, and her first thing. Bella didn't want to take things too seriously, so she wanted to refer her relationship with Edward as a 'thing', not really friends and not really a couple, just a thing.

Bella sat in a table near the back of the library. It was the table she always used to go to when she was in middle school. She didn't have a car then, obviously, so instead of going home she would take the bus and come here. It wasn't a long travel, ten minutes maybe, and she stayed at this very same table for hours. She did homework, read books, or just thought about her life. No one from school came here so no one could bother her, and she never told her parents about where she went. Her mom sometimes worried, but Phil for sure didn't.

It was an older table – the steel tables that were more common now didn't replace it. It was made of maple, or at least, Bella thought it was made of maple. There was a single lamp to the right, just beside the large window. She hadn't sat down at the table in so long – maybe since middle school graduation. So much had changed since then, and she kind of forgot about it. Especially when she got her license and was free to go wherever she wanted.

Bella sat down and put her backpack on the floor, zipping it open and pulling out her notebook and pen. Edward did the same.

"I bet we're the only two who hadn't done shit yet," Edward said, though his tone was teasing. He practically said the same thing last time they tried working on it

"A lot has happened since then," Bella shrugged. Opening her book, she scanned her notes. "Where do you think we should start?"

"I'm going to need to review again – it's been awhile since we last worked on it." Bella handed Edward her notes. He read them over, his brow creasing. She didn't remember much from the last time they worked on it either. After flipping through the pages a couple of times, Edward slammed the table with his hand lightly and let out a relieving laugh. "I know just what we need. I'll be right back."

Bella nodded in response. It boggled her mind how quickly he could generate new ideas – how bright Edward was. She wondered what he wanted to be when he was older. A doctor, or even a lawyer, or maybe an engineer. Whatever it was – he would be amazing at it. That made Bella wonder what she was going to do with her life. Yeah, she planned on getting the hell out of Forks right after graduation, but then what? What university would she apply to, what would she major in? Sitting at this table, her fingers drumming on its surface, she felt nostalgic of all the ideas she had in middle school. Thirteen-year-old Bella dreamed of being a journalist, or even a publisher. That's still what Bella wanted, but could she do it? Her younger self wasn't as broken as she was now – didn't know how cruel life could be.

Twiddling with her thumbs, she thought about how this table used to seem like shelter. It was in a quiet place where everyone here was too invested in their books to care about anything else. She realized then how lonely she was, to have to come here just for the sense of stillness that seemed to float in the air. Bella didn't ever want to be that lonely again, not when she suddenly had people she could rely on. Alice, Carlisle, Esme … Edward. Hell, even Emmett was starting to change – he did, after all, take care of Bella last night. Bella stared out the window, watching as the rain turned into a light drizzle. It was just past noon, and most people were walking around downtown with their families. They were probably looking for a nice Sunday lunch with their loved ones. Watching them, she realized that the solitude she once craved no longer existed in her list of priorities.

"I found it," Edward hushed as he made his way toward the table. He had a thin novel in his hands. It looked old with its yellowing pages and bent corners, but Edward held it as if it were a treasure. "I must have rented this book six, no … fuck, ten times, but each time it was like I was reading it all over again."

"That good, huh?" Bella said as Edward handed her the book. She flipped it on the other side, reading the summary on the back. "How would this help us with our assignment?"

"I thought one of the characters in our assignment can kind of emanate a quirk of a character in that book. It's kind of important actually – that quirk gave me the idea in the first place."

"Are you sure this is not plagiarism …"

"Isabella, I'm one of the top students in our class. Do you really think I'm going to fuck that up with plagiarism?"

She rolled her eyes. "I trust your judgment, but what is this quirk you're talking about?"

"Read the book, and then get back to me."

Bella laughed, that meant that they were going to put off the assignment again for at least two weeks. She looked out the window again and noticed how some of her classmates were now walking on the streets. They chatted with their friends and looked like they were having a good time – as if they had no troubles in the world. Bella wanted that.

"So … do you want to get out of here?" Edward asked reluctantly.

Still looking out the window, Bella nodded. "Definitely."

She gathered her things and waited while Edward did the same. They made their way to the front desk in order to check out the book. Once Edward was finished he stuffed the book into his backpack and zipped it up, hoisting it onto his shoulder. With his right hand supporting the strap of his backpack, he grabbed Bella's with his left. His hand felt warm and safe as he led her out of the library and into the streets of downtown Forks.

The rain was gone now, and the Sun began to creep away from the dark clouds. It warmed Bella's skin as they strolled down the sidewalk. She knew most of the people who walked past them, though it was only the ones she went to school with that gave her and Edward incredulous glances. They were curious and, though it was understandable, it made her want to go back to the library. She suddenly wondered why she ever wanted to be around people. That was a _stupid_ idea. Bella wasn't used to this. After weeks of having been stared at because of Edward, it still didn't seem right.

"How do you do it?" Bella finally asked Edward once they got through the crowd.

Edward gave her a confused expression "Do what?"

"Ignore all the people who just _look_ at you – who think things about you as you come into their line of sight."

"I just think 'fuck all of you' and get on with my life."

She nudged his shoulder. "Very funny, but I'm being serious."

"I'm being serious," Edward laughed and shrugged his shoulders. "It's not that I'm ignoring them, but before – before you – I used to get over it by thinking that if I kept acting a certain way then they were only watching because they appreciated who I seemed to be. But now that I've stopped pretending, I really just don't give a fuck. Most of my friends still like me, and so do the people at school. And I've got you, which makes it that much easier."

"How does me being here make it less difficult?"

"Just something about you, you know?"

"Not really," Bella replied, even though it was a lie. She knew what Edward was talking about because he made walking in the world that much easier.

Edward let go of her hand and put his arm around her shoulders. "Say 'fuck everyone'."

Bella turned her face up to him in disbelief. "Why?"

"Because the people who live in this town shouldn't matter. They don't control your life. They are irrelevant, so fuck everyone." Still unsure about it, Edward suddenly pulled her towards an alley and pushed her against the wall, hands on either side of her. "C'mon, Isabella, say it."

Sick of being pressured, she yelled out, "Fuck everyone _and_ their bullshit!" It echoed down the alley and Edward smiled down at her. "Are you happy now?"

"Are you?"

To her surprise, yelling it out did make her feel better. She started laughing and nodded. Edward, too, began to laugh with her. It really wasn't that funny, but whatever. It was relieving to know that when people passed by her, they didn't know that she was mentally cursing at them. Only Edward would know, and somehow that felt really special. And as they began to calm down, Bella realized that she was still trapped between Edward's arms. Edward noticed it, too, his gaze wandering from one hand to the other and then finally on Bella. In that moment, it was like the world stilled and they were the only two that weren't stuck. As Edward leaned in, Bella lifted her mouth to his.

Kissing was nothing like how they described it in books – it was much better. Having Edward's lips on hers, as they moved together so perfectly, Bella wondered what could top such bliss. Edward brought one hand down to her hip while she wrapped her arms around her neck, bringing him closer. He gently sucked on the bottom of her lip, which made her moan. She felt him press against her and she craved for more. It was like she had been kissing for years, not just for the past few days. It was so natural with Edward. Bella pulled away, then, giggling.

"No," Edward complained. "Don't stop."

He kissed her again, but she still pulled away. "We have to – we're in public."

"Don't you remember? Fuck everyone."

"I remember. But we also should probably head back to the library now. We've been gone for a while."

Edward groaned, and she knew it was because she was right. "Fine. But I don't like it – I'd rather make out with you in this sketchy alley all day than be grounded and pretend that none of this happened."

"Same." Bella agreed.

Edward kissed her once more, a quick peck, before shifting his weight off of her and pulling her hand in his. They walked silently toward the library hand in hand. Bella was on cloud nine. Last night's drunken adventure, this morning's hangover, her fight with Edward, and being grounded seemed significant now. She didn't look forward to going home, and when Edward made the call to Carlisle that they were ready to go, it all seemed too real. Once they were in the car Edward and Bella would have to pretend that they were in the library the entire time and that the kiss in the alley never happened. She'd have to keep the butterflies in her stomach to herself, and would have to fight the urge to touch Edward whenever he was nearby.

Carlisle arrived at the library five minutes after Bella and they and she felt sort of empty. The minute they were sat inside Carlisle's car, Bella hated that she was right. The story was that they were at the library the entire time and found exactly what they were looking for. Only Edward and Bella knew the truth, and that made her sad.

** x**

Dinner was pot roast, mashed potatoes, and green beans. As usual, Esme made it perfectly. The Cullen family liked to talk about their day during dinner, though today they completely skipped the grounding part and asked about the library. Edward explained what they were looking for and once he did, his parents understood why they went to the library. The book held importance to Edward, and everyone nodded their heads and believed that that was why they needed to be at the library. Bella added her input here and there to ensure that their lie was secure, but she could feel someone pull at her heart. When she looked at Edward, she could see that he felt the same way.

After dinner, like every night, Bella helped Esme clear the table and clean the dishes. She did it at home all the time, and even though Esme still persisted that she didn't have to do it, Bella kept reassuring her that it was what she wanted. Cleaning up after dinner was sort of a therapy, because it allowed her to think things through. And tonight, she definitely needed the dirty dishes.

Bella trudged up to her room after everything was clean and shut the door behind her. She was exhausted. Since she slept in Edward's car last night, she didn't get the best sleep. In its entirety, the weekend drained Bella. So much had happened in a span of three days, and she couldn't believe that it was only going to be Monday tomorrow. Surely it felt like it should _at least _be Wednesday. She hadn't even checked her phone all day, and when she did, she felt guilty that she missed three calls and fifteen text messages from Alice.

_Just checking to see if you're okay!_

_B, text me ASAP – I need to know if you're fine._

_OMG, did you die?_

_Okay, my last text was a little drastic. But seriously, where the fuck are you and why the fuck haven't you answered me?_

_BTW, I still love you! You're a fun drunk. _

Bella rolled her eyes and texted Alice, telling her she was fine and that she would explain everything the next day. She turned off her cell and placed it on her desk. She wanted to go to sleep, but it was far too early and she would wake up in the middle of the night if she did. Bella knelt down and pulled the bed skirt up and out of her sight. She found the shoebox that held all the money she had been saving in order to get out of Forks. Bella hadn't touched it since she collected her things the night her mom told her that she and Phil would be in Canada. It sucked that Detective Newton still didn't find them, but she couldn't do anything about that.

There was nothing else to do, and she didn't want to bother Edward in case he was sleeping. Bella opened the shoebox to the money that lay inside. It had taken her so long to get the amount she had now, but just looking at it made her excited for the day when she would leave. She stuck her hand inside and sifted through the money, only to find something that did not belong.

A white envelope addressed to her.

With anxiety and curiosity, Bella struggled to rip it open. Who would have put it in the shoebox? Nobody but herself knew of its existence. When she finally got it open she took out the white paper inside and unfolded it. Bella read through the letter so fast that she had to read it more than once to make sure that it was real. Her hands were shaking as she pushed herself off the floor and burst out of her bedroom and ran to Edward's. She knocked once, and when he didn't answer, she knocked incessantly.

"Okay, okay, I'm coming!" Edward said. Upon opening the door he was laughing, though with one look at her his expression became concerned. "Isabella, what's wrong? God, you're trembling. Come in."

Nodding, she pushed past him and he shut his door. Bella paced back and forth with the note in her hand. It wasn't until Edward stepped in front of her and placed his hands on her shoulders did she stop.

"Will you tell me what's going on?"

"Edward," Bella breathed. "I-I can't believe …"

"Isabella, you're scaring me. What's the matter?"

"Nothing. There's absolutely nothing wrong," Bella smiled incredulously. She gave Edward the note and he asked what it was. "I found it in my shoebox. Edward, I know where Charles Garland lives. I know where I can find my dad."

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**Twitter: kaarinaaxo**

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**Follow me my wonderful readers!**

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**WHO SAID THAT THIS WOULD BE UP BY JANUARY 8? WHO? OH, ME? WELL, DAMN!**

**Okay, but in all seriousness, I'm very happy to have this out in the time I gave myself. I even have this up before Tuesday! It was mostly fluffy and what not because I felt that this story needed some happiness haha. But of course, I gotta put this cliffhanger in there ;)**

**Thank you all so much for your continued support. Needless to say, I was quite surprised that I got support at all, seeing as I was practically MIA for six months. I forgot how much fun it was to just write for hours and not think about all the homework or exams that I would have to do. I'm excited to start writing more regularly.**

**In my absence, I got many requests about the books I read in the last year and which ones I thought were good enough to recommend. So here it is:**

**1) The Mortal Instruments and The Infernal Devices by Cassandra Clare (I'm sure this is not a shock since I was freaking out this time, last year)**

**2) The Summer I Turned Pretty by Jenny Han**

**3) Beautiful Disaster by Jamie McGuire (Definitely one of my favorite books! If you like those angsty romances ... this is it)**

**4) The Sky is Everywhere by Jandy Nelson (Also another favorite!)**

**5) Bared to You by Sylvia Day (I actually enjoyed this better than Fifty Shades ...)**

**Of course, there was more. _Lots_ more. But I'm just putting the ones off the top of my head so if you want any more recommendations just PM me! Also, if you have some books to request, let me know :)**

**Fuck, I always make my A/N's incredibly long. I'm sure you're all used to it by now haha. I hope you had a wonderful holiday season, and may this new year be filled with many blessings.**

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW :)**

**Much Love,**

**Karina.**


	26. Chapter Twenty Six: Adjusted

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a new phone case ... because I broke my last one.

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_Sink or swim, _

_Hold your breath and just dive right in._

_Ride the wave, _

_Just ride the wave far from where we came._

**_Sink or Swim - Lewis Watson_**

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********KEEP THIS IN MIND PLEASE! **There's a short texting segment in this. It's super short, but just in case you get confused, I'm here to save you :) Alice is italicized, and Bella is bolded & italicized. Okay, that is all. Enjoy!

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Chapter Twenty-Six: Adjusted

_**Bella**_

It had been a week since the note had turned up in Bella's shoebox. Since then she had done two tests, French and Math, handed in a History assignment, and done her best to ignore the attention she had received from her peers.

On Monday morning, as Edward parked his BMW in the school parking lot, Bella was still preoccupied with thoughts of the note. It had been from her mom, dated on the day she left with Phil. So many questions clouded her mind, like how did her mom know about the shoebox? How did she know that Bella would eventually find it? _Why_ did she want Bella to find it? She kept Bella in the dark about her real dad for seventeen years, why did she want to unravel the truth now? Bella couldn't sleep because of these questions. She couldn't answer them, and she desperately wanted to know how. And now she knew where Charles Garland was, and maybe he could answer her questions.

"Can I be honest?" Edward asked as he shut off the engine.

Silence filled the car before Bella nodded. "I guess so."

"Okay, don't take this the wrong way … but you look like shit."

Bella rolled her eyes at his remark.

"Thank you, Edward. I'll remember to go to the bathroom before class to make sure I look good enough for you."

"Hey, I didn't mean it like that. Isabella," Edward grasped her wrist as she started to unbuckle her seatbelt. "Would you please stop assuming the worst? I was going to continue and ask if you had gotten any sleep this week. I know finding that note must have been a shock."

She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose, letting out a deep breath. "I know, I'm sorry. You're right – I'm not getting much sleep. But can you blame me? I go through my lifesavings, in the shoebox that _nobody_ knew about, and find that my own mother left me a note about Charles. It's just strange."

Edward shrugged. "She was your mother, Isabella, and as misguided as she may have been with raising you, she must have known some stuff. Maternal instinct, you know?"

Bella only nodded before the school bell rang, and students began to make their way towards the front doors. Edward sighed and she knew that it was time to go. If she really wanted to, she could have skipped the day and Edward would have gone with her. However, she knew that school would help as a distraction until they could get a handle of the entire situation, and Edward was also aware of this.

They stepped out of the car and Bella embraced the cool air, taking slow breaths and trying to calm herself down. Edward's arm had found it's usual spot around her waist, and it slightly helped with the slowing of her heartbeat. By now, the buzz about Edward and Bella had died down, but it was still good gossip. Here and there she would catch someone staring at her in class or whispering about her as she passed by, and they wouldn't even be glares or sneers – they would be smiles. It was weird – what did they think she could do for them?

Bella also got a lot more attention from Rosalie, which wasn't all it was cracked up to be. Having French with her didn't help, but Alice didn't mind telling her off when she needed to – she was pissed that Rosalie was able to get back Emmett and wrap her around her finger. Edward still wasn't talking to his former best friend either, which made the situation that much worse. It was strange to think that someone of Rosalie's status and beauty would be so fixated on someone like Bella, but also completely satisfying.

Standing outside her first class, which was, unfortunately, chemistry, Edward let go of her waist to stand in front of her and grab both of her hands. He locked his eyes with hers before he said, "My first rehearsal for the play is today."

"I know."

"You don't have to stay if you don't want to. If you want to sleep then by all means, go home when school is out for the day. Don't feel the need to stay just for me – Alice said she would be fine with dropping you off at home."

"You talked to Alice about this?" Bella shook her head before Edward got the chance to explain himself. "Whatever. Edward, thank you for giving me options, but I know today is an exciting day for you. You may seem chill on the outside, but let's be real. Everyone at school knows that you are a smart person who likes to act, and yet, you're still at the top of the ranks. You don't have to hide anymore, especially not to me."

"You're the best," Edward chuckled before lowering his mouth to hers.

Ever since Edward kissed her at Paul's party a week ago, Edward decided he was going to have a "fuck everything" mood and just kiss Bella whenever he wanted to. Bella didn't mind, however, because Edward was good at kissing, _really _good. The Monday back to school was when he kissed her after she got out of the car – the school went ballistic about that. But after that he kissed her at lunch, between classes whenever they saw each other, and before and after school started. Forks High realized that their public display weren't really "news" anymore, and that was perfectly fine.

Edward began to use his tongue when someone cleared her throat. Bella didn't need to pull away to know who it was.

"Edward, we're going to be late for Calculus." Rosalie sweetly said as he and Bella pulled away from each other.

"It's okay. Go on without me," Edward politely replied.

Rosalie gave a sweet laugh, like Edward was joking. "Don't be silly – we used to always walk to class together. Why don't we anymore?"

"Because you lied to my face to make me hate someone. All for your own benefit," Edward was biting the inside of his cheek now – trying not to lose his temper. "I'm serious, Rose – you can walk yourself to class."

Rosalie let out a huff before strutting down the hallway in her heels. Edward shook his head, and then rested his forehead against Bella's. She knew that the whole thing with Rosalie was hurting Edward. Losing someone who you thought was your best friend was never easy, especially since Rosalie acted so selfish with Edward. Bella let go of his hand to place hers on his cheek, allowing Edward to lean against it.

"Are you going to be okay?" Bella asked.

"I'll manage. You?"

She shrugged. "I'll manage."

That caused Edward to chuckle and give her one swift peck as the warning bell echoed through the halls.

"I'll see you at lunch, Isabella," Was all Edward said before he began to make his way towards his class, his fingers lingering in hers before the inevitable distance tore them apart.

Bella entered her classroom and sat in her seat just before the teacher walked in. Some people greeted her as she pulled out her books, and she greeted them back only for the sake of being polite. She didn't like that because she was with Edward that people thought she was worthy, but she wasn't going to stoop to their level and treat them like they had to her. It took a lot of convincing to herself to do such a thing, when really all she wanted to do was either run and hide or rub it in their face that she, even the Duck, could grab a hold of someone like Edward. Of course, Bella still wanted to do such things, but after watching Edward transform before her eyes into a better person made her realize that she wanted to be better as well.

But she still hated the guts out of her classmates.

She ignored the glances people stole to look at her, and tried to focus on the lesson. Bella was getting better at it, but she wondered if people did this to all the popular kids, like Edward. God, that must have been awful. Tapping her pen against her notebook, with her chin resting on her hand, Bella caught sight of a boy she never talked to in her entire life wink at her before turning back around. _Gross_. Who did he think he was? Who did he think _she_ was? Bella tried to contain her disgust by turning her gaze on the teacher, and only the teacher. It was times like that when Bella really just couldn't handle high school.

Chemistry could not have taken longer to finish. The minute the bell rung Bella sprung out of her seat and headed straight for the door, ignoring the people who were calling her name, her actual name, to have a conversation. Sometimes, within the last week, Bella stayed behind to chat for a little bit, but today she just wasn't in the mood. Well, she was never in the mood, but today she just couldn't take it. At all.

Edward was right, Bella _was_ tired. For the past week Bella had been tossing and turning as her mind kept her up with thoughts of her mother's note. She had all the information she needed to find Charles Garland and discover the truth, but many aspects were holding her back. The obvious, like how to get to him and questioning of the validity of the note stopped her, but so was the fear. The wonder. After all of the shit that Bella had to go through because of this secret, she should have been overjoyed that she found the answer. But was it _really_ the answer?

"Wow, for someone who apparently had a hot make out session before school started, you look miserable," Alice said as she walked beside Bella, linking their arms.

"I didn't even notice you coming towards me."

"Oh, that bad, huh? Well I guess you can't always believe the hype."

"What are you talking about? Oh!" Bella nudged Alice and laughed. "Shut up. He's a really good kisser, for your information. Stop slamming him. I just had something else on my mind."

Alice paused before giving Bella a knowing glance. "You were thinking about that note again, weren't you?"

"You know me too well – maybe we need to break up."

"Hell no, bitch. You're stuck with me for life," Alice nudged her back. "You need to stop stressing so much. You found the information you were pining for, for months. Christmas break is in two weeks – that's the perfect opportunity to find your dad."

Bella sighed. "It's not that easy."

"Why the fuck not?"

"Well, for one, he lives in California. I could probably drive there, but even then I have to find a hotel and stuff. That's a lot of money."

"Hotel? Bella, your dad would probably want you to stay with him."

"How do you know that? For all I know, he's a criminal who is smuggling prostitutes."

Alice chuckled. "Not likely. You're forgetting that I used to live in Cali, and your dad? Damn, he lives in a really good part. I had a friend who lives on that street. If you wanted, I could even ask if you could crash with her."

"I can't let you do that for me. And besides, I don't even know your friend – imagine how awkward that would be," Bella shook her head. They were nearing their French class now. "The fact that he lives in such a nice neighborhood makes me wonder why my mom and Phil didn't want me to meet him, you know?"

Stepping through the door, Alice and Bella let go of each other and sat in their seats. Alice sighed as she pulled out her things. "I can't tell you what to do, but what I _can_ tell you is that if you don't go to him, you'll regret it. And besides, Christmas break is like _the_ perfect opportunity."

"I know what you're saying, Alice. I'll think about it, okay?"

"Good."

Class started, but that didn't mean the conversation was over. Alice liked to text in class. Bella never passed notes in class, not that she had anyone to pass them to, but even then no one passed literal notes anymore. Sitting at the back of the room, Bella had noticed that almost everyone was hiding their phones under the desk or behind books. It made her feel a little better, especially since Alice was entertaining in all aspects.

_The devil's spawn is glaring at you. Again,_ read Alice's message.

Bella quickly typed her reply. _**She glares at me everyday. You should have seen her earlier today … OMG.**_

_Spill!_

_**Well, as you apparently know, while Edward and I were kissing she interrupted us and basically begged him to walk with her to class**__._

_The fuck? What did Cullen say?_

_**He said 'no', of course. But I know it upsets him to lose his best friend.**_

Alice's reply took a little longer than expected. _It's her own fault, B. She was the one who made up some bullshit story about you and used it so that Edward would hate you too. What I want to know is why Rosalie did it in the first place._

_**You and me, both. I never did anything to her, so I don't know what her deal is.**_

As soon as Bella hit 'send', she saw a shadow cast over her. Looking up, Mr. Cormier had his arms crossed with an unimpressed expression on his face. She could hear Alice whisper "Damn" as he held out his hand for both of their cell phones. Bella gave Alice an apologetic glance only to be returned with Alice shaking her head and quickly averting her eyes towards Rosalie's desk. Turning her gaze forward, she saw Rosalie give a smirk and a quiet tsk.

What a bitch.

She didn't understand why Rosalie was being so rude to Bella, especially now that people didn't call her the 'Duck' anymore. Was telling Mr. Cormier that they were texting an attempt at revenge on her part? If anything, Rosalie was a hypocrite, because she was now texting away on her cell phone. Of course, she was probably doing that on purpose so she could gloat. Rosalie's manicured nails tapped away on her phone and Bella wondered if she was trying to say that she always got what she wanted, even at other's expense. If that was the case, then the message was received.

Bella sighed and crossed her arms, slumping in her seat. Mr. Cormier had placed her and Alice's phone in his desk drawer, and they wouldn't get them back until the end of the day. Her French teacher was the only one in the school who didn't give back caught cell phones at the end of class. She was glad that her phone had a password on it, after Alice had forced her to get one in case anything like this would happen. Bella had no other choice but to pay attention in class. She was so done with today. _So_ done. And after talking with Alice about Charles, now she was questioning whether or not Christmas break was the right time. Bella knew Alice was right, if she never went she wouldn't be able to forgive herself.

Disregarding her anxiety about meeting him, the basic question still held: how the hell was she going to get to California? Malibu, of all places. Driving there was an option, but even then it would be a hell of a road trip. There was also the Cullen's – what would she say to them if she decided to leave for the holidays. The least she could do in return for their hospitality is spend the holidays with them and help them with anything they need.

"Okay, Class," Mr. Cormier clapped his hands together. "Say the words on the board, please."

As the class monotonously said what was on the board, Bella could practically hear Alice rolling her eyes. And by the time class had ended, she could tell that her friend wanted to rant.

"I need my phone," Alice sighed. "I feel naked without it."

"Well, I guess you'll be feeling naked until school lets out."

"I fucking hate Rosalie Hale. If you're not going to do damage to her, then _I_ will."

"All because she ratted us out?"

"No, but that is certainly part of it," Alice leaned against the locker next to Bella's. "I'm just sick of her being such a bitch to you, to everyone. The only reason that my brother is even with her is because he's blinded by her looks. That, and because he's getting laid."

Bella shuddered. "Ew, Alice. Some things are better left unsaid."

Alice shrugged. "I just want to know why she sees red when you come into her line of sight."

Bella didn't give a response, and she was sure Alice didn't need one. No one knew what Rosalie's motives were, and no one wanted to find out more than Bella. After putting her books away and grabbing her lunch, she closed her locker door and they both made their way to Alice's locker. Of course, Alice took longer than Bella to grab her lunch. Not only did she have to put her books away, but also she had to check herself in the mirror she placed on her locker door. Bella only chuckled and shook her head – they were so different from each other, it was a wonder that they had grown so close together.

Upon entering the cafeteria, Bella saw Edward was already sitting at their table. His friends at his other table didn't really care anymore, except for Rosalie, and sometimes sat with us. Even though she wasn't so quick to forgive his friends for the years of torment, she had to admit that they were pretty cool. Apparently she was too, according to them. And today sitting beside Edward was Alec. Out of all of Edward's friends, Alec seldom made fun of her before. Now that she got to know him, it was possible that he was also the one she liked the most out of Edward's friends.

"Well, well, well – look who's here!" Alec announced with a grin on his face.

"Shut the fuck up, Alec," Alice rolled her eyes, trying to hide her smile.

"Hey, no need for the hate, Alice," Alec put his hands up in defense. "Just excited to see you guys, is all."

For the third time that day, Alice rolled her eyes.

Bella settled herself beside Edward, who greeted her with a kiss on her temple. Unlike her peers she wasn't used to the public displays of affection yet, so when both Alice and Alec groaned, Bella flushed. Alec laughed that she was still so shy about being with Edward because, in his words, she should be standing on tables and yelling to everyone to 'fuck themselves for doubting her.' She didn't remind Alec that he was once one of those people, but she still laughed at the thought.

Unpacking her lunch, Edward then leaned over and asked, "How's your day so far, Isabella?"

Bella was about to answer, however, Alice interrupted her. "Shit. Today has been _shit_ because your ex-best friend decided to rat us out for texting and now our cell phones are being confiscated for the rest of the day."

"Basically took the words out of my mouth, Al," Bella laughed.

"Sorry about that, Alice. If I could make Rose ease off, I would," Edward said, his brows creasing.

"Don't sweat it, Cullen. I'm just going to rip her head off, is all."

Alec laughed dubiously. "Damn, Alice. Remind me not to piss you off."

They all laughed at Alice's outburst, but out of the corner of her eye, Bella could see something was bothering Edward. His smile didn't make it to his eyes – it was all a show. She hated that he sometimes hid his troubles and made it seem that all was okay, but she understood that he didn't want to concern anyone with everything. Bella tried not to let Edward get in the way of her lunch, especially since Alice's spirits were now lifted and Alec was being so kind.

_Man,_ Bella thought to herself, _how did I get to this point?_

Scanning the cafeteria, like she did everyday recently, Bella couldn't help but sigh at the many people who stole glances at their table. No longer was the "popular" table the center of gravity – this was. This table, the one that was placed in the corner of the room, was now getting the attention it lacked for so long. Edward noticed this too a couple of days ago, as well, and only shrugged. The kids in Forks were … diverse. There were the usual stereotypes – cheerleaders, jocks, stoners, alcoholics, bad asses, nerds, and the like. Bella never fit in with any of them, and yet, they all seemed to take interest in her. When she had asked Edward if he had gotten more attention, he shook his head. It turned out that she was the one everyone was talking about.

"I don't think I'll ever get used to this," Bella said, her eyes still scanning the room. "People seem to think I'm a phenomenon, or something."

Alec shrugged. "After a while, you kind of just forget about it."

"Easy for you guys to say – you've all had experience with being … um …"

"Popular?" Alice chimed in.

"Not the word I was going for, but okay."

"Look, Isabella," Edward put his arm around her. "I know that this is basically a complete turn around, but trust me when I say that it _will_ die down. Eventually."

"I don't know, Edward," Alec sighed. "If I were Bella, I'd be milking the shit out of all the attention and get someone to do my homework."

Edward picked up a baby carrot and chucked it at Alec. "Nice one, man. Remind me to go to you if I ever need advice."

"Your sarcasm moves me, Ed."

"Fucker," Edward mumbled.

When the bell rang and students began to get out of their seats, Alec gave us all a wave and made his departure towards his locker. Alice wasn't too long after that, saying she was in a rush because she completely forgot that she had an assignment due and that she hadn't even started yet. Bella only shook her head for Alice to know that she was being scolded, in which Bella then got a glare.

Unfortunately, today wasn't the day that Edward and Bella had creative writing, which meant that Bella had a free period and Edward was in art. She wasn't sure why he took it, but she had a feeling it was because it was an easy class. Bella walked with him towards his class, smiling at people who greeted her even though she didn't want to react at all.

Once in front of his class Edward sighed. "I guess I'll see you after school."

"I'll meet you in the auditorium, and after rehearsal I expect you to tell me what's bugging you."

"Then you'll have to understand when I say that I expect you tell me what's bugging _you._"

Bella didn't get the chance to reply before Edward leaned down and kissed her. It was only a peck, and yet, it was long enough to tell that they were both unsettled.

** x**

Watching Edward perform was like being in another world.

The funny thing was that none of the actors were even going full out because it was only the first rehearsal and they were getting a feel with their characters. At least, that's what Edward told her. For all she knew, they _were_ their characters. Especially Edward, who already knew all his lines thanks to the many times he asked Bella to read them with him. Edward was on stage with a guy who was in her Chemistry class, Jared, who was playing the lead role. Jared and Edward were supposed to be sitting on the bleachers and having a guy chat. Their characters were sarcastic with each other, but they were also joking and laughing, and were even serious at times. It reminded her of Edward and Alec.

It also reminded her of herself and Alice, but the male version.

Bella was able to get her cell phone back after the final bell rang. She had changed quickly out of her gym clothes and into her jeans and t-shirt before meeting up with Alice. Mr. Cormier had given them a brief lecture about how it was rude to be texting during class and that it would only affect them in the future. After promising to never do it again, he let them go. However, they both knew that that promise was void. Alice offered to drive Bella home so she didn't have to wait for Edward, but she declined. Bella had been looking forward to this rehearsal for a while – just watching Edward was mesmerizing. The fact that he was acting, and not for the sake of anyone else, made it that much better.

After an hour and a half, Ms. McGrath called it a day. "Great first rehearsal everyone. See you all on Wednesday."

The production dispersed after those final words. Edward jumped off the stage and made his way to Bella. He was hiding it, but she could see the tinge of excitement that Edward was running on. He put his arms around her. "So, what'd ya think?"

"I have to admit – it was entertaining," Bella laughed. "The most important thing was what _you_ thought."

She watched as Edward searched his mind for the answer. "It was … great. A lot more fun than I thought it would be. I'm also glad you stayed, it made it that much better."

"You're so sappy, Edward. What happened to when you used to call me a bitch and I called you an asshole?"

"Ah, the good old days," Edward joked, causing Bella to jab him in the stomach. "Ow! I was joking! And I'd rather us be the way we are now as to how it was before. Also, I know what you're doing. Let's go talk."

Bella groaned. "Can't we put it off?"

"Afraid not. We're not going home until we get discuss the elephant in the room."

Edward was right, and she begrudgingly put her coat on as they made their way out of the auditorium and towards the school doors. He held her hand as he fished for his keys with the other. Bella leaned into him, seeking comfort before they talked about what was bugging both of them. She knew it was nothing bad, but still, it always made her nervous. She liked that Edward was more open with himself, but she didn't like how that also meant that she had to be the same way.

After unlocking the doors, Bella got into the passenger seat and waited patiently as Edward ran around to the other side to take the driver's side. As soon as he closed the door, a slight drizzle started.

"You first," Bella said before Edward could.

"Ugh, fine," Edward shook his head – he always went first. He sucked at the game. "I was upset when you told me about what Rose did to you guys in French class."

"Technically, Alice told you."

"Does it matter?" When Bella didn't reply, he continued. "I hate that she's being such a bitch to you when you haven't done anything. I hate it even more that I can't stop it. I mean, I could talk to her about it, but you and I both know that it won't be that easy. I want to be there for you, Isabella, and when Rose does stuff like this it only makes me feel helpless."

Bella touched his cheek when he hung his head. "You shouldn't feel that way. You're forgetting that I can take care of myself, Edward. Yeah, Rosalie pisses me off and the fact that her motives are unclear is irritating, but that's nothing compared to what I went through before. And don't start feeling guilty about that, either. I know she was your best friend, but what I've learned from my friendship with Alice is that friends don't use each other as ammo. You weren't the perpetrator, Edward. You were a victim, just like me."

"Not quite like you, but I get it."

"Sometimes I make sense, okay?"

Edward laughed at Bella's lame attempt at a joke. He pulled her hand from his cheek and brought it to his lap. "Your turn now, Isabella. Don't hold back."

"It's about the note again, Edward. Like it has been for the past week," Bella sighed. "I talked to Alice about it earlier and she gave me this entire lecture about how meeting him would put me at ease, but would it? I don't even know him. Not to mention he lives in California. How would I get there? And if I turn up uninvited, what would he say?"

"A simple, 'hello', is always an icebreaker."

Bella narrowed his eyes at him and he chuckled. "It's also the matter of _when_ I would go. Alice said that I should go during Christmas break, but I don't know if that would be the right time. Your family has been so great to me. How can I leave during the holidays when I could be helping out?"

"You don't need to help out with anything," Edward reminded her for the umpteenth time. "And as for the whole Christmas break thing, my parents wouldn't mind. They would understand."

"It just wouldn't feel right."

Interrupting their conversation was the ring of Edward's cell phone. He pulled it out of his pocket and touched the screen. "Hello? Mom? Yeah, I'm fine. What's up?" Bella waited for Edward to finish up, but from the sound of it, Esme sounded excited. A grin broke out on Edward's face as he looked at Bella. She gave him a questioning look. She didn't like that expression. "That's great, Mom! Of course I'm excited. Of course Bella wouldn't mind. No, I'll tell her – she's right beside me. I'll see you at home. Love you, too."

After hanging up the phone, Bella couldn't stand not knowing what was going on. "Edward, what's happening?"

"Something great."

"Well, that's vague."

Edward grabbed both of her hands with that grin still plastered on his face. "Don't be mad, but going to see your dad just got a lot easier."

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**Tumblr: i-nfiniteinspiration**

**Twitter: KarinaCullen (this is my NEW TWITTER ACCOUNT. the other one is still available, but it's my personal one. Feel free to follow but don't feel obligated. This twitter account is where I'll be posting all things FanFiction, which includes updates about this story and anything that's coming up, as well as stories I enjoyed, etc).**

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**Hi everyone, I hope you are all well!**

**What's been going on in the last two months? Well, school happened ... again. However, I was slightly better with getting this done. And just so you know, I wrote this chapter within the last week (and by that, I wrote 20% last week and the rest today), which proves to me that I can most definitely write despite my hectic uni schedule.**

**I know I left you all off with a cliffhanger again, please don't hate me. I love you. Please love me.**

**Another reason I procrastinated on writing was because I read a lot (surprised? not really). Here's the list, since you guys seemed to like when I did this last update:**

**1. _Thoughtless_ by S.C. Stephens**

**2. _Effortless_ by S.C. Stephens**

**3. _Easy_ by Tammara Webber**

**4. _Love Unscripted_ by Tina Reber**

**5. _Love Unrehearsed_ by Tina Reber**

**6. _The Vampire Academy Series_ by Richelle Mead (I had to re-read these books. I don't know why, I just had the urge to)**

**7. _Slammed_ by Colleen Hoover**

**8. _Point of Retreat_ by Colleen Hoover**

**9._ The Night Circus_ by Erin Morgenstern**

**10. _The Host_ by Stephenie Meyer (I had to re-read this because the movie is coming out!)**

**And, of course, there's more ... I just don't remember all of them because it's 11 pm and I'm running on caffeine. I should actually be studying for my exam, but I love you guys and this story too much to not write. I was so inspired!**

**I love you all and thank you for your continued patience and support. **

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**Much love,**

**Karina.**


	27. Chapter Twenty Seven: Opportunity

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a One Direction calendar that I got for Christmas. Don't know why I'm only mentioning this now haha.

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Chapter Twenty-Seven: Opportunity

_**Bella**_

They were boarding the plane.

It had been two weeks since Rosalie had ratted Bella and Alice out for using their phones in class, Edward's first rehearsal, and Esme's news about spending the holidays in California. The day that Edward and Bella were telling each other their problems was the same day that Carlisle had booked the tickets for a one way trip to the Golden State. Edward hadn't told Bella what the phone call was about until they got home, and then all three Cullen's told them the news together. Bella believed they did that so she wouldn't have the chance to decline their offer.

"I don't want to intrude …" Bella had tried to reason.

"Don't be ridiculous," Carlisle had replied. "We would be delighted to have you come with us. You've been living with us for months now, so you're pretty much already family. Besides, we can't just leave you here by yourself – It's Christmas for God's sake!"

"I understand, but …"

Esme sat down beside Bella and put her hand on top of hers. "Please stop trying to get yourself out of this, Bella. You know that we love you, and taking you with us to California is no issue at all. We're _excited_ that you get to come, don't you see? If you weren't with us we wouldn't feel the same. We've grown very fond of you over the time that you have lived with us and, like my husband said, you're practically family."

"That's very generous of you both but I still wouldn't be comfortable with …"

"With what? Money? You don't have to worry about a thing, Bella. Your mother left you in our hands and we are taking full responsibility of you."

It hadn't been because of the money; well, at least not entirely. Bella wasn't completely sure what the cost was to take a direct flight from Seattle to California, but she was sure it wasn't cheap. With money aside, Bella was truly panicked at the prospect of being so close to Charles Garland. Yes, she talked about _maybe_ going to California during the break to see him, but actually going through with it didn't cross her mind. Now there was an opportunity in front of her, and that was scary.

Bella had looked into Esme and Carlisle's expectant eyes, seeing how they truly wanted her to come with them and it made her heart ache. Renee and Phil never showed her so much affection, not even during Christmas. The holidays at the Swan house was quiet – everyone did their own thing. Even on Christmas morning when they opened presents, Bella had to show Phil that she truly appreciated what he gave her to avoid getting another injury. However, at that moment, Bella felt warm all over. She felt safe.

"Okay, I'll go." Bella had agreed. Carlisle threw a fist in the air and Esme gathered her in her arms. "On one condition," This got their attention. "You'll let me pay you back for my ticket."

Carlisle had interjected. "Bella, that's not necessary …"

"My terms, or I'll just stay here by myself."

With a look toward his wife, who gave him a small nod, he let out a defeated sigh. "Okay, deal."

Bringing herself back to the present, Bella leaned back into her chair. She watched out the window as the plane began to leave the gate and make its way down the runway. Bella had only been a plane once, and that was when she was ten. Phil had been on a business trip in New York so Renee took her to visit him for a couple of days. It was probably the nicest memory of Phil she ever had. Phil had stayed in the hotel his company paid for while Bella and her mom stayed in one two blocks away. Bella only saw Phil in public, which meant he pretended to be the perfect father. It was merely three days, but it was the only time that Bella felt she truly had a dad.

And now she was on a plane to see her real dad, and her heart was beating so hard against her chest.

"Calm down," Edward whispered into her ear. "We haven't even ascended yet."

"I'm not afraid of flying, Edward."

"Then what are you – _oh,_" Bella nodded to confirm. "Did you bring the note with you?"

"I did."

"Do you mind if I read it again?"

"Not at all," Bella fished for the note in her pocket and handed it to Edward. "Here."

Edward took it out of her hands and his eyes scanned the page. Bella had read it enough times to memorize it. She didn't know why she even brought it on the trip, but leaving it behind just didn't feel right. It really only took a minute, if not less than that, to read the note. Edward was reading it over and over again, which was what he always did when it was in his possession. Edward had tried everything to find out what he could about Charles Garland, but all he could come up with was what was written on the note – the name and address. Bella had accepted that finding him wasn't easy, and the fact that Renee had given them any information was helpful. Edward on the other hand did not accept that fact. He had googled Charles' name too many times to count and couldn't find anything about him. Edward hoped that there was a hidden message inside the note, Bella didn't believe so but she let him dissect it.

Like any other note, it began with addressing the reader.

_My Dearest Bella,_

_Understand that everything I have ever done was for you, my daughter. I know that I have not always been the best mother, but I did my best. Apologizing for not helping you whenever Phil took his anger out on you would not help, I know that, but I will say it anyway._

_I am sorry, Isabella. You deserved better than what I had offered you, and I am a selfish woman for letting you believe a lie for the benefit of it being easier for me._

_Seeing you run out of the house the night you found out the truth made me realize the true damage I had done on not just you, but on Charles. He is your father, not Phil._

_Enclosed is Charles' address. I do not have his number otherwise I would have given it to you. I trust that you will use this information wisely, as this is the only information I am willing to offer. The rest needs to be told from him._

_Good luck, Bella._

_Love always,_

_Mom_

Bella sighed. When she first got the note, she didn't like repeating it to herself. Now she didn't care – it was impossible to forget about it, might as well just think about the words from time to time. Edward had given her the note back and grabbed hold of her hand. Esme and Carlisle were sitting two rows ahead of them and they still didn't know about Bella and Edward's relationship. They didn't really know what it was either – but Bella was comfortable, and looking over at Edward she could see that he was too. Bella wanted to tell Esme and Carlisle the truth, had even approached Edward with the idea a week ago, but he disagreed with the idea.

"Are you ashamed of me?" Bella had asked, her voice shaking.

An astonished look spread on Edward's face. "Why would you think that?"

"It's just that you must have dated other girls and I get that I'm not in that league so you can just tell me …"

"You're crazy. Of course you're not in that league – you're better."

He didn't even kiss her properly, just on her forehead. It was enough of a confirmation that Edward was telling the truth. Bella still didn't know why he wouldn't tell his parents, but decided to wait on his terms.

They were high above the clouds now. Bella was briefed about Edward's family who lived in California. His grandma, Esme's mom, lived in Glendale and had invited them over for Christmas instead of her going to Forks like she had originally planned. Edward's other family on his mom's side was scattered all over the country and already had plans in their own homes. It would only be his grandma, his parents, himself, and I for the holidays. Before knowing this information, Bella was worried about spending Christmas with a big family because she had never done so before. She was at ease with the small get together, and was surprised that his grandma was apparently "excited" to meet her.

Bella wasn't sure if she should be nervous about that or not.

Edward had put on his earphones and was asleep, allowing Bella to peak out the window with her thoughts. The farther away they got from Washington made her unsure if it was a good idea to agree to go on this trip. She had paid Carlisle back almost immediately after the deal, to his and Esme's dismay. Edward was excited to go to California again, telling her all the stuff that they were going to do. The last time he was there he was only twelve, and now that he could drive he couldn't wait to go places without his parents and most importantly, so he said, to take _her_ places. Bella wasn't sure where these places were exactly, but she trusted Edward would be doing anything to relieve her of the stress that had been festering over her for the past two weeks.

Alice, on the other hand, had not been so patient with Bella's anxiety. There was a lot of swearing involved, though it was all said lightly, before Bella accepted that Alice just wanted her to relax and have a good time. That, and to stop worrying about what was going to happen when she knocked on Charles' front door. Bella knew she shouldn't be thinking like that, and that she should really try thinking of other things, but it seemed to be impossible.

"Miss?" A stewardess with red hair asked. "Would you like anything to drink?"

"Um, just sprite, please."

The stewardess put some ice into a plastic cup, opened a can of sprite and poured it. As she handed it to Bella she nodded toward a sleeping Edward. "Do you know if he would like anything?"

Bella looked at him, his expression blank and yet so peaceful. "Maybe just water for now."

"Good idea," the stewardess laughed.

She gave them two small bags of pretzels before continuing on to the next passengers. Bella wasn't hungry, but she knew Edward would be when he woke up so she placed her pretzels onto his table, right beside his water. She sipped on her sprite and checked her watch. An hour had passed. There really wasn't much to do on a plane, so she didn't know what to do for the next hour and a half. Bella leaned her head against the chair and looked out the window. There was nothing but clouds below them. She was literally above her problems.

Bella didn't even realize how tired she was until she fell asleep, her face toward the sky.

** x**

"This way, Isabella," Edward said as they made their way out of LAX.

She and the Cullen's had grabbed their luggage from baggage claim and were now making their way to the shuttle. Carlisle had explained that they would be renting a car during their stay here, but that whenever she and Edward wanted to do something else that they would be driving his grandma's car. Apparently, she hardly ever drove it anymore.

LAX was a lot busier than she had expected, but at the same time she knew it would be filled with people since it was the holidays. Tomorrow was Christmas day and everyone was either coming home or going somewhere else. Bella stood on the small platform with the Cullen's, waiting as the driver of the shuttle placed everyone's luggage inside. When he took hers, she gave a small "thanks" before going inside and sitting beside Edward.

"Oh, Bella," Esme said, putting her hand on Bella's shoulder. "I'm so glad that you came, truly. I don't know what it would have been like if you weren't here."

Esme's words made Bella want to cry. She didn't, of course, but she still melted. "I'm glad I'm here, too. Thank you again for inviting me."

"You weren't asked, Bella – you were _told_.You really didn't have a choice," Carlisle teased.

Bella chuckled and saw that Edward was watching her with a smile on his lips. When his parents were deep in conversation, he softly said, "I'm glad you're here too, Isabella. Thrilled, actually."

Edward's gaze held hers, and she was too stunned to reply. Instead, she smiled and patted his hand. She retracted and crossed her arms. Bella didn't like keeping her relationship with Edward's parents a secret, and it was hurting her that it had to be so. How many more secrets could she really hold before she exploded? Bella didn't let Edward know this, and she didn't want to push him, but how far would she push herself? Bella decided to focus on something else, like the ridiculous amount of traffic it took to get to the place when it really only should have taken less than ten minutes. They were going to rent a car so they didn't have to rely on anyone else to drive them, but Bella wasn't looking forward to the traffic they would be going into.

The driver, once again, helped everyone with their luggage. Bella pulled up the handle of hers when she was outside and took a deep breath. It was _a lot_ warmer in Los Angeles than it was in Forks. It wasn't burning hot, but warm enough that she didn't need a jacket. Her purple a-line tank top and jeans were enough for the slight breeze, and she grabbed her sunglasses out of her purse and slipped them on. Edward had pulled up beside her and had his sunglasses on as well.

"Your mother and I are going to go line up for the paperwork, did you two just want to stay out here?" Carlisle asked.

Bella looked at Edward and shrugged, he did the same thing. "Yeah we'll stay here. We're soaking up as much warmth as we can get."

Carlisle laughed and then he and Esme went inside.

"The weather is so beautiful," Bella said. "I've never seen palm trees in person." There were palm trees lined up on the sidewalk, tall with the leaves dancing with the wind.

"Get used to it, they're fucking everywhere," Edward replied.

Bella giggled. "Okay, what else should I expect?"

"About Cali? No clue – I haven't been here in a while. Anything can happen," Edward stuffed his hands in his pockets. "I can tell you that my grandma loves everything and everyone, so don't get nervous about meeting her."

"I'm not." Bella actually was kind of nervous, but not completely phased by it.

"You're a shit liar."

"So what, you know I suck at lying anyway," Bella said. "And even if I am nervous about meeting your grandma, it's nothing compared to how I'm feeling about what's happening two days from now."

Edward sighed and put his arm around her shoulders. "It will be fine, and if you keep telling yourself that instead of stressing over it, maybe you could relax a bit."

"Easier said than done."

"Just try it, Isabella. For me?"

Bella nodded and Edward kissed her forehead. Bella loved it when he did that. It was so innocent yet it held so much affection. She closed her eyes as his lips lingered, and hated it when he pulled away. It was good timing, too, because Esme had popped her head out the door and told them to come inside – the car was ready to go. Edward helped Bella with her luggage as they walked up the stairs towards the door. Esme led them towards the area where all the cars were. Parked near the exit was a white sedan with Carlisle already behind the wheel. They loaded the last of the luggage and got inside the car, with Esme in shotgun and Edward and Bella in the back.

Traffic had lessened a little bit as they exited the building and were on the freeway. There were still a lot of cars though, and Bella wondered if it would be this busy in whatever place she would live in when she graduated. She forgot how fast Carlisle drove and watched as they passed by many cars that were too slow for him. The GPS guided them to their destination in Glendale and it took them half the time it would have usually taken people to get there.

Edward's grandma lived high up on the mountain, which apparently was a good thing. They parked across the street from the house and Bella took in its size. It wasn't as big a house as either hers or the Cullen's, but still large for a woman who lived by herself. It was an older house, but Bella already loved it. A woman who looked like the older version of Esme stepped out the front door with her hands out in front of her. She had the same heart shaped face and caramel colored hair as Esme, though her hair was beginning to gray. She wore a floral shirt and white pants, with yellow shoes to match. Esme ran into her mother's arms first then stepped away so that Carlisle could embrace his mother-in-law.

"Edward," Esme said. "Say hi to your grandmother."

Edward set his luggage on the ground and walked into this grandmother's arms. "Hi, Grandma."

"Let me get a good look at you," she said, her voice not too different from Esme's. Edward's grandma held him at arms length as she took him in. She grinned. "You're much taller than last time, and good looking."

"Well it's been two years since you last saw me."

"And that was too long! Oh, I missed you so much!" She cooed as she leaned in to give Edward a kiss on the cheek.

Bella felt like she was watching from the outside when Edward was suddenly at her side again. "Grandma, this is Isabella …"

"Bella," she corrected and held out her hand. "It's nice to meet you."

Instead of taking her hand, Bella was pulled into a hug.

"Oh it's so nice to finally meet you, Bella. My Esme has told me so much about you," After hugging Bella, she held her at arm's length just like she did to Edward. Bella felt a little insecure as those eyes looked over her, but she received a smile that reached the woman's eyes. "Call me Jocelyn, by the way."

Bella nodded. "Okay."

After that, Jocelyn told everyone to get inside and settle in. Edward had told Bella that Esme grew up here and had gone to college in Seattle, which is where she met Carlisle. Bella found that hard to believe. However, stepping through the door, Bella noticed how much Jocelyn's home reminded her of the Cullen's. It was different yet the same. The furniture here was dated, with floral couches and light wooden tables and cabinets. The lamps were crystal with white shades. The walls were a pale pink that brightened the house. Back at the Cullen's the furniture was more modern, with dark tables and black leather couches and clean white walls. The houses were decades apart, and yet, they both felt so warm and welcoming.

It was the smell of baking the really struck the similarity. Bella knew that Esme used to bake for a living, and she now understood that she got her passion from Jocelyn. Seeing them now, talking so animatedly, Bella wondered what her life would have been like if she had the same relationship with her own mother. Her mind started to wander towards the possibilities when Jocelyn's voice interrupted them.

"Edward and Bella can share your old room, Esme. I set up two beds there. I hope that's okay."

It was Carlisle who spoke. "Of course it's fine. Bella's basically family."

There it was again – _family_. No matter how many times they said that, it always seemed like a shock to Bella.

"Perfect! Okay, I'm just going to get started on dinner while you all get settled," Jocelyn said.

"I'll help you out, Mom," Esme said.

Carlisle took his and Esme's luggage into the guest room while Edward and Bella made their way to Esme's old bedroom. Just like Jocelyn said, there were two air mattresses on the ground with blankets and way too many pillows. Bella guessed that when Esme moved out that this room became vacant and Jocelyn had no other reason to use it. It was completely bare.

"Just like old times, huh?" Edward asked.

"You mean when you're parents didn't know that I was crashing in your room in order to escape from mine?"

Edward laughed. "Good times."

Bella rolled her eyes. "If you say so." She collapsed onto the bed closest to the window. She wasn't tired and it was only three in the afternoon, but Bella just wanted to lie down.

"Isabella?"

"Yes, Edward?"

"I have a question …"

"Shoot."

Edward sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I know we're kind of doing this whole thing backwards, but I was just wondering, maybe, if you wanted go out? Like, on a date?"

_What …_

Instead of saying that out loud, Bella sat up. "Really?"

"Yeah," he shrugged. "I mean, I've wanted to ask for a long time but there's never been an opportunity. And now that we're here in Cali and the weather is so nice I just thought it would be a good idea – you know what? Okay, I get it. It was a _stupid_ idea …"

"Edward – "

"Don't say 'yes' on my behalf, Isabella. I know I said we would take this slow, so whenever you're ready..."

"Shut up, Edward. Seriously," Bella said, silencing him. She got up from the air mattress and walked towards him. "Do you really want to take me out on a date?" Edward nodded. "Then I would love to."

He let out a sigh of relief. "Thank God."

"When are we having this date, anyways?"

"Tonight," Bella was about to ask how that was possible, since Jocelyn was making dinner for them. It would be rude to make other plans. "Don't worry about it – I have a plan."

He always had a plan, but instead of arguing with him about it or asking any more questions, she kissed him on the cheek.

** x**

Bella was having the best dinner of her life. Seriously – it was _that_ good. Jocelyn had made roast beef with mashed potatoes and green beans – basic but oh so good. Conversation was easy as well. She felt comfortable around Jocelyn and enjoyed her company.

"What are your plans after graduating, Bella?" Jocelyn asked.

Bella set down her fork and knife before answering. "I'm planning on going to college, though I'm not sure which one yet. Anything outside of Forks would do."

Jocelyn laughed at that. "I don't blame you. The last time I visited I didn't know what to do with myself. Not much entertainment."

"Exactly."

It was true, but entertainment wasn't why she wanted to leave town. Of course Bella didn't mention that to Jocelyn. She asked Edward what his plans were as well, and Bella was surprised to hear that he said the same thing. She knew that Edward was meant for bigger and greater things, but she always assumed that he would want to stay close to his family since they were so close. As Bella ate her dinner, she wondered why she never asked Edward his plans for the future, and why he never asked her for her plans. They talked about how they didn't like to keep things from each other, yet they kept something huge as a secret. The future was major, and they never talked about it.

Bella tried to shake off that thought throughout the rest of dinner, and when Jocelyn came back from the kitchen with pie Edward folded his napkin on the table. "So, Grandma, Bella and I were thinking about going around town for a bit. Is that okay?"  
"Edward," Esme said. "At least finish desert first."

Jocelyn shook her head at Esme. "Don't worry, Esme. I want Edward and Bella to enjoy themselves while they're here, and I'm sure they don't want to be cooped up with a bunch of adults," She placed the pie on the table and left again. When she came back she had a pair of keys in her hand. "Take care of the car while you're out."

Edward got up from the table and walked around to the other side to give his grandmother a kiss on the cheek. "Of course, Grandma. Thank you," When he retrieved the keys he looked at Bella. "Ready?"

Bella spoke to Jocelyn. "Are you sure it's okay? We can stay and help clean up first."

"Just go, Bella," Jocelyn smiled. "Thanks for offering, but I don't want you two going crazy on Christmas Eve."

With that, Bella got up from her chair and did something she didn't expect to do – hugged Jocelyn. Bella didn't know why she did it. It was just that Bella never had a true holiday celebration, and this woman had welcomed her into her home. Esme and Carlisle had done it, even Edward, but they knew her prior. Jocelyn had just met Bella a couple of hours ago, and before that she agreed to let Bella stay at her home without even knowing her. It was so kind.

After letting go, Bella sheepishly wove goodbye to Carlisle and Esme and then followed Edward out the front door. He handed her the utility jacket she had brought with her, and she slipped it on. Once they were outside and the door was closed, Edward took hold of her hand and dragged her towards Jocelyn's car – a Honda CR-V.

"She never drives this?" Bella asked incredulously. It looked brand new.

"Never. It was my uncle's and when he got a new car he gave it to her."

Bella nodded in understanding as Edward opened the passenger door for her. She gave him a pointed look – he knew that she wasn't incredibly fond of him doing that. Bella was perfectly capable of opening the car door herself.

"This is a date, Isabella. These kind of things are done on dates," Edward teased.

"You act like there's going to be a second date," Bella said.

"Oh, there will be."

"We'll see."

Edward laughed and closed the door, running around and getting inside the driver's side. He turned on the engine and then programmed the GPS. Damn, this car was jacked up and was never used. What a waste. Edward put his arm around the back of her seat and reversed out of the driveway. Before she knew it, they were out of the community and driving towards the freeway.

"I don't suppose you're going to tell me where we're going."

"Pasadena," was all he said.

"What's in Pasadena?"

Edward smirked as he glanced at her. "You'll see."

Her stomach always flipped whenever Edward was coy like that, and she couldn't help but laugh. Bella couldn't believe that she was on a date with Edward – girls at school would die at the opportunity. She used to gag at the idea of doing such a thing with him, but now she felt a sense of pride, especially when Edward reached over and held her hand. The drive to Pasadena was not long at all and Edward followed the GPS until he found the perfect place to park.

"Do you like walks?" Edward asked.

"You're making me walk on our first date?"

He chuckled. "Yes, but it's a _romantic_ walk. First date stuff."

Bella rolled her eyes. "Is there like a manual for this or something?" Edward laughed again and got out the car and, because it was a first date thing, he opened her car door. She got out of the car and shook her head at him, trying to hide her smile.

"This is Old Pasadena," Edward informed her. "My mom used to take me here all the time whenever we came."

There were a lot of shops and cafes on Old Pasadena, and there were a quite a few people as well. Bella grabbed hold of Edward's hand. "Lead the way."

And so he did.

They passed by some stores, and went into others – never buying, just looking. Bella was enjoying Edward's company, and knew that they couldn't do such a walk in Forks. The environment here was different – more alive, freer. Bella couldn't wait to graduate and move to a place that had this same atmosphere.

"I didn't know you wanted to leave Forks after graduation," Bella said.

"I didn't know you wanted to, as well," Edward replied.

"We never talked about our plans for the future, why?"

"I'm not sure – I guess it just never came up."

"Isn't that the whole point of a relationship, though? Telling each other their goals and stuff?"

"I guess so," Edward said, looking up at the sky. "I'm not really good at the whole relationship thing in the first place. I'm pretty much going into this whole thing blind, taking whatever comes our way, you know? I just know I'm a lot happier now than I was before I found you in the woods."

Bella cringed at the memory. "That moment in the woods – I wish I could take it back. It was a spur of the moment thing. I can't imagine if I ever went through with it, what would have happened …"

"Hey," Edward murmured trying to calm her down. "That's the past. The most important thing is what we do _now_. Which is why I kind of wanted to ask you something."

"Oh?" Bella asked as Edward nodded his head and lead her toward a quiet spot on the sidewalk.

Edward had grabbed both of her hands so that he was facing her, and he looked wary. Bella felt uneasy about what was about to happen, but before she could say anything he spoke first. "The thing about how the present is so important is what got me thinking about us. I'm tired of taking things slow, Isabella. The truth is that anything could happen, and if we don't act now, we might not ever get the chance. And so, I guess, I was wondering what you thought of the idea about being my girlfriend?"

"Girlfriend?" Bella whispered, stunned.

"Yeah, girlfriend."

How did she feel about it? They were basically already in a relationship, they just didn't have labels. They agreed to take it slow, but had they really? Bella was so new to this and even though Edward claimed he was, too, she felt a little bit more inexperienced than him. Even with her insecurities, the idea of being Edward's girlfriend made her heart skip a beat. Edward had made her life better since he helped her during her lowest part in her life, and she would never forget that. Life without Edward was unimaginable now, and she would always have Edward in her life.

"Okay," Bella said.

"Okay? Really?"

She nodded. "Yes, Edward. I'll be your girlfriend."

For the second time that day, Edward thanked God. Bella laughed and leaned up to kiss him. He was usually the one to initiate any kissing, but this time she felt brave enough to do so. Edward moaned into her mouth and the vibration sent shivers down her spine. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer. Bella could feel him smiling against her lips as he pushed her against the wall. She could hear people grunting at them and telling them to get a room, but she couldn't care less. Bella couldn't believe that one person could make her so happy, especially when she didn't think it was even possible. The fact that it was Edward, the boy who she used to hate, that made her feel this way only told her how wrong she was about him. Their circumstances before had been set up, and now that nothing could stop them Bella knew that Edward felt the same way – this was real, and this was _right_.

"One thing," Bella breathed as she pulled away.

"Name it."

"Call me 'Bella' from now on."

Edward chuckled and nodded his head. "Bella. _Beautiful._"

And when he kissed her, she truly did feel beautiful.

* * *

**Twitter: KarinaCullen**

**Tumblr: i-nfiniteinspiration**

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**How much do you love me for updating twice in the same week? Seriously, I love myself for even doing it haha.**

**This chapter was semi-fluffy, and I'm saying "semi" because it really only got fluffly near the end. Don't worry ... it won't last. MUAHAHAHA! Lol, okay, I'm not actually evil I'm just trying to say that this story would be nothing without drama .. so watch out.**

**I also want to say thank you to the people who messaged me happy birthday - I'm sorry I didn't reply. I opened the messages on my phone and then when I had enough with autocorrect and decided I would just reply on my computer, I completely forgot. So yeah, thank you so much! I'm surprised you actually remembered my birthday since I didn't mention it since I turned 16, which was ... chapter 6? Holy crap haha. Back when I was excited to get my license ... now I'm 18 and am tired of driving people everywhere. Seriously. Any who, thank you again. I was very surprised to get any greetings at all. **

**And I guess I'm sort of making this a tradition because you guys seem to like it, so the book I've read since the last update is "On Dublin Street" by Samantha Young. It was really good! I had trouble pacing myself because it's a shorter book compared to what I usually read, but it was SO GOOD. Loved it!**

**Much Love,**

**Karina.**


	28. Chapter Twenty Eight: Worthwhile

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, but I do own a serious lack of motivation which is preventing me from starting my term paper. Well then ...

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Chapter Twenty-Eight: Worthwhile

_**Edward**_

Christmas day had passed without incident. Edward and Bella had come back from their date at one in the morning, only to be woken up six hours later to open presents. It was still strange to think of Isabella as _Bella_, since he had called her by her real name in the entire time he had known her. And, yet, it seemed right to call her by her preferred name. Throughout the night Edward had noticed how she would react to him calling her Bella – a quirk of her lips, a squeeze of his hand. Simple things. The fact that she had agreed to be his girlfriend that night only made his heart soar. Edward had never had a girlfriend before, only flings that lasted no more than a week, but he liked the way it sounded.

_Bella Swan_, he thought, _my girlfriend_.

Yeah, he fucking loved that.

It had been difficult to get out of bed when his grandma woke him up on Christmas morning. Edward swore, which got him a small slap on the arm and a "watch your language." After he apologized and his grandma left the room, Edward had lazily got off the blow-up mattress and crouched down to Bella. He shook her shoulder, only to get a small grunt. Edward learned that Bella was even less of a morning person than him, which he didn't think was possible. She was deep in sleep and Edward thought that she never looked as peaceful as she did at that moment.

Feeling courageous, Edward lowered his face and pressed his lips lightly on the corner of her mouth, and then her cheekbones. Bella took a deep breath and groaned. Edward kept kissing her face until she started giggling and was finally out of bed. While Bella took a few minutes to wake herself, Edward took that opportunity to brush his teeth. When he was finished, Bella followed suit and told him that she would meet him at the Christmas tree in a bit.

Edward reluctantly left Bella to herself and made his way to the family room, his feet padding against the cold wooden floors. Edward always loved coming to his grandma's house because of all the picture frames that were hung on her walls and sitting on tables. Everywhere he turned there would always be at least one family picture. Edward noticed how many of the pictures had him in them – holidays, baby pictures, and the like. Even so, Edward's favorite picture was of him and his grandma when she was in Forks. Edward was thirteen, and he remembered that picture because it was a time when life was easy, when he didn't have to live up to the expectations his peers expected of him. Edward always wondered what life would be like if he could just be himself without the fear of being judged, and now he knew.

"How was Old Town?" His Grandma asked as he sat on the floor with his legs crossed.

"It was fun – I forgot how much I loved going there," Edward yawned, scratching his head. "Bella liked it a lot, too."

Just as he mentioned her, Bella had arrived and sat beside Edward, also crossing her legs and yawning. Edward couldn't help but smirk.

"Good morning," she said.

A jumble of Christmas greetings went around as his father handed gifts. From the corner of his eye, he saw the look of surprise on Bella's face when she saw that there was a gift for her. Bella took it out of Carlisle's hand and mumbled her thanks, caressing the gift like it was fragile. Edward didn't like to push Bella too much about her life before the night in the woods, but it was times like these when he was more curious than ever to hear what she went through.

They all began unwrapping their presents. A lot of _ooh's_ and _ahh's_ were exclaimed. Edward had received a bunch of CD's from his grandma (all of which he didn't really listen to, but appreciated them nonetheless), and an iPad from his parents. He was surprised about that gift – it was too much. Edward was planning on saving up for one with what he made at the diner. He was pulled out of his train of thought when he heard a small gasp from beside him. Bella had unwrapped her present from his parents. Edward already knew what it was – an e-reader. He had told his mother that Bella loved to read, and had suggested the gift.

"Oh – I – What …" Bella stammered, shaking her head as she turned the box in her hands. "I don't know what to say."

"Say that you love it," His mom said.

"I do, I really do love it. But it's too much – I can't accept this."

"You can and you will," His dad then replied, putting his hand on her shoulder. "You can pay us back by reading as many books as you want on it."

Edward saw that Bella was speechless, and she nodded her head in agreement.

Grandma then got up from the couch and exclaimed that she was going to start cooking for the day, and his mother followed after her. His dad went back to bed, which left Edward and Bella alone by the Christmas tree. Wrapping paper and the small glow of the lights on the tree surrounded them.

Edward scooted closer to Bella and leaned in to whisper in her ear, "My present for you is back at home."

Bella turned her head so that their noses barely touched. "Yours too."

"Merry Christmas, Bella."  
The corner of her mouth quirked up in that way when he said her name, and he felt himself go warm all over.

"Merry Christmas, Edward."

** x**

Bella was tossing and turning in her bed. Edward knew why, and he also knew that anything he said in hopes of appeasing her would be useless. He was lying flat on his back, the moonlight trickling through the curtains and creating a blue glow in the room. Edward always wondered what his mother's life was like here – he used to dream about it. He was born and raised in Forks, and as much as he appreciated the town life, Edward wanted more. He planned on moving to a big city, though which city he wasn't sure yet, and go to college. Edward wanted to have a place of his own. Most of all, Edward wanted to go to a place where no one knew his family, his money, and his stupid fucking reputation. For most of high school, Edward couldn't wait to just leave, to do it all on his own and rebuild himself. He realized now that he already rebuilt himself, and that he didn't do it alone. It was all because of Bella.

Turning his head, he watched as she bit her lip in her sleep. Edward didn't like when Bella went to bed nervous – it made her have bad dreams. Watching her right now, Edward could see himself going wherever Bella went. He may not have had a girlfriend before, but he also knew not to jump into anything too quickly. However, with Bella, it made him want to do all sorts of things. Everything.

Edward sighed. He used to make fun of guys who let themselves go when it came to girls, and now he was becoming the very same thing – a fucking sap. The thing was that he couldn't even be mad at himself because he was happy. It was like a breath of fresh air, like his lungs could finally function properly. He could breathe, breathe life and breathe joy. Things he didn't think he could feel in the life he had been living for so long.

Just then his cell phone rang – a quiet shrill diluted underneath his pillow. He was so quick to stop the sound so that it wouldn't wake up Bella that he answered it without looking at his caller ID. Edward unlocked the screen by sliding his finger across it and brought the iPhone to his ear.

"Hello?" Edward whispered, his voice thick with lethargy.

"Merry Christmas, Edward!"

He groaned.

"Rosalie …"

"I can't believe you actually answered your damn phone!" Rose laughed, relief seeming to flow through her words. "I wasn't sure you would, but every year we call each other at midnight to say 'Merry Christmas' because when we were little, we didn't want it to end and pretended that the next day was Christmas all over again. I just didn't want to give up tradition."

Edward sighed. "Rose …"  
"And by the way, where are you, asshole? I'm standing on your porch waiting to give you your present."

It was a couple heartbeats before Edward answered. "I'm in California."  
"What the fuck? I didn't know you were in Cali!"

"That's because I didn't want you to know."

"You're still mad at me," Rose said.

"I don't know anymore, Rose," Edward replied honestly. "You were my best friend – the one person who I should have trusted my life with, and you manipulated me. You hurt someone for your own benefit. How can I trust you?"

He could hear Rose sniffling. "Like you did before."

"I can't. Things are different."

"They don't have to be! We can start over, Edward. We can be just like how we used to be before …"

"Before your lies were exposed?"

Edward glanced over at Bella who was still sound asleep, her breath heavy. Not wanting the chance of waking her up, because he could feel his anger rise, he got out of bed and made his way out of the room. He shut the door behind him and could still hear Rose crying on the other end of the phone. He couldn't understand what she was saying when she sobbing. He walked through the kitchen and out the back door, letting the cool California breeze calm him, though it did little.

"Were you ever going to tell me, Rose?"

Rose took deep breaths before she whispered, "I don't know," Edward pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. "You were supposed to take me."

"What?"

"The last time you came back from Cali, I told you that I always wanted to go. You put your arm over my shoulders and told me that the next time you went, you would take me with you."

Edward had forgotten about that. "That was a long time ago."

"Did you take her? The Duck?"

"That's not her fucking name, Rosalie," Edward seethed, gripping his phone. "And yes, actually, I did take _Bella_ with me."

For a while, neither of them spoke. Edward only knew that Rose was still on the other end because he could hear her breathing. He could hear her quiet sobs, and hated that he still felt guilty about making her cry. Edward was raised better – he shouldn't have made _any_ girl cry. However, then he felt justified, because he made Bella cry numerous of times on the foundation of Rose's lies. It was karma.

"You were always so good at breaking my heart, Edward." Rose whispered, so quietly that Edward almost missed it.

And then the line went dead.

** x**

_**Bella**_

Bella woke up to the sunlight that peeked through the break in the curtains and splayed over her face. She rubbed her eyes and flipped onto her other side. She really was not a morning person, but with the sun seeming to be on a mission to shine its intruding rays upon her, Bella found that she could not go back to sleep. It wasn't like she had the best sleep of her life, but it still would have been nice to nod off.

She wasn't sure what time she finally fell surrender to her exhaustion, but she knew that it took a while. Today was the day that she and Edward would go visit Charles. Edward had stated numerous of times that it would probably be best to give him a call first to let him know that she had found him and was planning to visit. Bella had rejected the idea, claiming that the element of surprise would benefit them, as Charles would find it difficult to deject the confrontation. The truth was that Bella was nervous enough – giving Charles a call might have given her an anxiety attack. She knew she couldn't put off meeting her biological father any longer, but at least not letting him know of her arrival was _sort of_ a form of procrastination.

The nerves seemed to start from her chest and make a slow journey towards her fingertips, toes, and the ends of her hair. It consumed her and, though she couldn't quite remember, she felt that she had had a nightmare. Not being able to lay any longer without hyperventilating, Bella ripped the sheets off her body and got off the blow-up mattress. She walked over to her suitcase and pulled out her bag of toiletries and some clothes. She pulled her hair over to one side as she pulled out a mint, off the shoulder, dobe-waist dress that ended just above her knees.

"Morning," Edward's groggy voice greeted.

She looked over her shoulder and gave a sheepish grin. "Morning. Go back to sleep, Edward. I didn't mean to wake you up."

He propped himself onto his elbows and shrugged. "I wasn't sleeping too well, anyway."

"Me neither," Bella sighed, picking up her things and standing up. "I was just going to start getting ready."

"It's only nine in the morning. I thought we were going to Charles' place at 1."

It was Bella's turn to shrug. "I can't sit still, Edward. I'm already so anxious." She saw Edward's face soften and as he was about to say something, Bella headed towards the door. "I'm going to take a shower – I shouldn't take long."

Bella felt slightly guilty for leaving Edward like that, but it had nothing to do with him, and he knew it. She was grateful that Edward was willing to go through all this crap with her, but sometimes she couldn't take his sympathy. It wasn't his understanding that made her frown; it was _why_ he was sympathetic. Edward lived a blessed life – a mother who baked him cookies when he got home from school, a doctor for a father to bring home the money, a grand house, and a fast car. His parents loved him endlessly, and everyone at school adored him (regardless if he was a douche or not). He had his own music room on the top floor and had a job that he enjoyed.

What did Bella get in her life?

She got parents that made her wish they ignored her instead of paying so much attention to her flaws, a house as grand as Edward's but felt so empty, a faster car than Edward's but not as satisfying as she thought it would be, and, until recently, a student body that repulsed from her. The differences in her and Edward's lives were so vast, and that's why he was sympathetic. She despised that it had to be that way and if things were different, if she had a good life like his, then he wouldn't have been burdened with her shit. It surprised her at all that Edward liked her, had asked her to be his girlfriend, but she was slowly starting to believe that _maybe_ she was worth something.

Turning on the water, Bella held her hand in it until she was satisfied with the temperature. She stripped of her pajamas and ran a quick hand through her hair before stepping under the spray. She cupped some water in her hands before splashing it on her face. Its warmth sent tingles throughout her body, calming her. She stood under the shower for a couple of minutes, relishing it, before she began washing herself. As Bella soaped her body, she took notice of all the scars she had accumulated over her lifetime. They were all faint now, white and small so no one really noticed them, but she couldn't help but stare at her flawed skin.

On her chest, right above her right breast, was a horizontal line. Bella had received that from Phil when she failed her first exam in middle school. He claimed that she embarrassed him and threw a picture frame at her that cut through her shirt. Bella remembered that she had to wear high-collared shirts for weeks before makeup could cover it.

On her left shoulder was a small circular scar. Bella had complained about not ever going travelling with her parents, as she wanted to experience new things with them, and didn't understand why she couldn't come along. She was eleven, and Phil punched her in the shoulder when she was turned away from him for not being grateful for all he provided for her. He was wearing his college ring that day, it's circular face cutting through her skin and bruising her when it made contact with her flesh.

Right above her knee was a curvature that extended up to the middle of her thigh. Phil was drunk the night of the homecoming dance of her freshman year. Of course Bella didn't want to go, but was persuaded once Renee told her _endlessly_ that she might regret not going in the future. When she came home, three minutes past curfew, Phil had been waiting for her in the living room with a glass of scotch in his hand. He had swirled the amber liquid before saying that he was worried about her and assuming that she was out with a boy. In his rush to yell at her, he stood up and knocked the glass lamp over. He had pulled her by her hair and threw her to the floor, right on top of a large piece of glass that pierced her bare skin.

She hadn't realized that she was on the shower floor until she heard a faint knock on the door.

"Bella?" Edward's muffled voice asked. "Are you alright?"

"I-I don't know."

"I'm coming in, okay?"

When she heard the bathroom door open, Bella brought her knees to her chest and rested her cheek on them. She could feel Edward pausing before the shower curtain.

"Can I …"

"It's alright, Edward. I don't mind," She said.

Edward hesitantly opened the shower curtain. Bella could tell that he didn't know what to expect behind it, but when his eyes settled on her, he sighed. He seemed to have some sort of mental conflict, his eyes flickering between the water and her before he took his socks off.

"Fuck it," He muttered and got inside the shower. He sat across from her and brought his knees to his chest as well, wrapping his arms around his legs after he closed the shower curtain. By doing so, Bella felt that she and Edward were isolated from the rest of the world. The fact that she was completely naked didn't bother her, and Edward didn't make any note of it. Bella guessed that he was merely trying to be respectful, given the circumstances, but she appreciated it nonetheless.

"Won't your family think something is going on? She asked.

"They left five minutes ago to run some errands – they won't be back until tonight," Edward replied, looking at her with a worried expression. "They didn't notice that you've been here for a while, but I did. I was scared you accidentally fell, hit your head, and became unconscious."

Bella laughed quietly. "The funny thing is that I probably could end up doing that to myself."

He chuckled lightly, though it didn't last long. "Are you going to tell me what happened?"

She let out a long breath. "I was washing myself when all my scars just … they seemed to be popping out at me, like all I could see are my flaws," Bella could feel her eyes stinging, though she didn't know if she was actually crying or if it was just the water. "It made me wonder what Charles will think when he sees me. Will he see the scars and think of me as weak? Will he think of me as trash? Is seeing him even a good idea?

I just wonder what he'll think about me when I explain to him what Phil did to me, and what Renee didn't do to help," Bella whispered, tightening her grip around her legs tighter to her chest.

"Bella, look at me," When she didn't respond, Edward pleaded. "_Please_."

The pain in his voice made her raise her eyes.

"I think you're the strongest person I have ever met. After all the _shit_ you had to endure, your scars only prove that you're a survivor. If Charles doesn't see that, then damn him. I'll take you out of his house and we'll drive away and laugh at how naïve he is. You make me a better person and have shown me that it's just better to be myself because, in the end, it doesn't really matter what others think of me so long as I haven't disappointed those I care about. And you know what, Bella? I care about you. No, scratch that. I _admire _you, because you're strong. You're scars aren't ugly, Bella. They're beautiful. You shouldn't be ashamed."

The water had begun to soak threw Edward's clothes, his white shirt clinging to his body – the sight making Bella stare just a little too long before averting her gaze. She blushed and tried to hide her grin. Bella couldn't imagine doing all this alone, and for Edward to say that she was brave – she, of all people – made her feel better.

"When did you become so good with words?" Bella asked.

"I'm not," Edward said. "I just know how to tell it like it is."

She bit her lip to try smothering her laughter, but she couldn't help it. A soft chuckle escaped and she then realized something. She wasn't nervous about being stripped in front of Edward before with all her troubles clouding her mind, but now she was all too aware with how _exposed_ she was. Resting her chin on her knees, she looked straight into Edward's eyes.

"I'm naked."

"And I'm not. Are we stating the obvious, now?"

Bella rolled her eyes. "Edward."

Edward laughed and stood up. "Okay, fine." He climbed out of the shower and just before closed the curtain, he gave her one of his signature smirks. "If you find that you need help _at all, _just say the word and I'll be here."

"Out," Bella said, pointing towards the door.

"Okay, okay! I'm just saying …"

Edward closed the shower curtain and when she heard the bathroom door close, Bella released her hold on her legs and stood up. She continued to wash herself and massage shampoo in her hair. All the while Edward's words stayed in her mind. Until this moment, Bella never believed that she was anything special. She always viewed herself as _average_, but never anything more. Until Edward, she never felt like she survived anything, like her past defined her.

So as she washed away the buds of soap, she also washed away the troubles of her past.

* * *

**Twitter: KarinaCullen**

**Tumblr: addictedbooker and i-nfiniteinspiration**

* * *

**Hey guys! I'm sorry for the late update, but I had midterms, projects, work, and whole shit load of other things that wouldn't let me write. Luckily, I found some time to finish this chapter! And by "found some time", I mean that I should be working on my term paper for history that's due exactly one week from today but instead I am doing anything I can to put it off. Not the best idea, but my motivation has been gone for weeks. My last day of classes were today (Thank God!) and finals start next week (Fuck. My. Life).**

**_It should be said that next chapter is pretty major_ ... so ... watch out for that!**

**Again, I'll list all the books I've read since I last updated. Because I'm not motivated at all, I've been reading tons. I'm also letting you know which books are 18+ because some of you have had questions about that.**

**1) _Clockwork Princess_ by Cassandra Clare (I got this the day it came out and finished it the next day. I'm still crying and freaking out. I need to vent! THIS IS NOT A JOKE MY LOVLIES. I. NEED. TO. VENT. WILL HERONDALE FEELS.)**

**2) _Walking Disaster_ by Jamie McGuire (if you loved the first book, _Beautiful Disaster_, you'll love this one too! 18+)**

**3) _Delirium_ by Lauren Oliver**

**4) _Pandemonium_ by Lauren Oliver**

**5) _Requiem_ by Lauren Oliver (That ending did not satisfy me at all ...)**

**6) _The Fault in Our Stars_ by John Green (Going through some major Augustus feels ...)**

**7) _Crash_ by Nicole Williams**

**8) _Clash_ by Nicole Williams (sort of 18+ but for some reason it's in the teen section. I feel this entire series should be in the romance section)**

**9) _Me Before You_ by Jojo Moyes**

**10) _Dinner With a Vampire_ by Abigail Gibbs (I'm just saying that this is basically the 18+ version of Twilight, but not really. Okay. It's not like Twilight but it is 18+)**

**11) _Reckless_ (A great conclusion to the _Thoughtless_ series! Loved it! And I love Kellan ... and it's 18+)**

**Okay, that is all I have to say for now. I miss you guys and once my finals are done I'll be writing more :)**

**Much love,**

**Karina.**


	29. Chapter Twenty Nine: Shock

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a fat ass cat who is currently sitting on my lap!

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Chapter Twenty-Nine: Shock

_**Bella**_

Edward was feeling a little faint before they left to visit Charles. It was just before noon, and they hadn't had lunch yet. They were planning to pick something up on the way, but Bella wasn't comfortable about leaving with Edward feeling so off. She made him lie down on the couch while she whipped up a sandwich. This wasn't her kitchen, and she didn't want to make a mess out of Jocelyn's. It was very organized, and it reminded her of Esme's kitchen.

She placed the turkey sandwich on a plate and poured a glass of water. Bella was about to bring it to Edward when he entered the kitchen, his face slightly pale.

"You didn't need to get up," Bella said, placing the sandwich and the water down on the counter. "I was going to bring it to you."

"I felt like I needed to walk around," Edward explained, rubbing his forehead with the back of his hand. He picked up the sandwich and took a large bite. After swallowing, he grinned. "It's delicious. Thank you."

Bella touched his arm gently. "Don't thank me, Edward. After everything you have done for me, it's the least I could do."

"I don't expect you to repay me, Bella, especially when everything I've done has been from the heart – there's a difference." Bella wanted him to elaborate on that when Edward took another bite of his sandwich. "Do you want to sit down for a bit? I'm feeling a bit better, I'm just gonna let the food settle and then we can head out."

"Okay, I have to grab my purse from our room anyway."

Bella squeezed his arm gently before letting go and making her way out of the kitchen. She was determined to ensure that Edward was feeling better, not only because she needed his strength for today, but because after all the times Edward had looked out for her, she finally had the chance to do the same. It seemed that Edward was invincible, even during the time when he wasn't sure whether his reputation had primacy over his happiness. He had pulled through that and had decided that putting himself first instead of what others expected of him was most important. Bella, though she was the one that pushed him to do so, couldn't see herself doing the same thing. For a long time Bella accepted that her peers treated her like shit and would continue doing so without bothering to know her personally. It had only been when Edward stepped up that she found that she shouldn't have had to put up with anyone. She was stronger because of Edward.

Alice, who said that mint green was "so in" and that "all the girls in Cali would be wearing it", picked out the dress that Bella was wearing. She wasn't sure if she would have chosen the color since all the girls would be wearing it, but she liked the way it fit on her. It had off-the-shoulder sleeves that exposed the tops of her shoulders, giving a good profile of her collarbones. It cinched at the waist and showed off what curves she had, and it stopped mid-thigh. Bella had chosen her purse, which was a taupe cross-body, and was glad she had brought it with her as it only carried her wallet and cell. Alice had argued that she bring a bigger purse since she was travelling, but Bella had countered her statement by claiming that she didn't want to be carrying so much when she would be moving around.

Thinking about Alice made Bella desperately miss her best friend. While Edward was a great listener and gave her wonderful advice, she just really needed a girl to talk about everything with. She wanted to gush to Alice about her date with Edward and how he asked her to be his girlfriend. Bella wanted to talk to her about her breakdown in the shower earlier and how she felt like her nerves would eat her alive. Bella pulled out her cell and sent a quick message to Alice: _Missing you._

Alice's reply was quick.

_I miss you, too. Call when you get back from Charles?_

Bella typed that she would do just that and then put her cell back in her purse. She shut the bedroom door behind her and crossed her arms as she walked over to the kitchen to see how Edward was doing. Bella found comfort in walking down Jocelyn's hallway – seeing all of the family photos that were hung on the wall. She especially enjoyed the picture of Edward that had him dressed up as a cowboy for Halloween – he must have been four or five years old. It was adorable.

Bella was about to approach Edward when she saw him zipping up that black kit she had seen on occasion back in Forks. He tapped on it once before picking it up and placing it in the drawer by the sink. It never really occurred to her to ask Edward about that kit, mostly because she forgot about it. However, now that Bella thought about it, she could count that it had made an appearance three times a day. It wasn't that Bella didn't trust Edward, she was simply curious. It obviously wasn't anything illegal, otherwise the Cullen's wouldn't have been okay with it.

Was he sick? Bella couldn't find any other reason for the black kit, and it would explain why Edward had to go to the doctor once a month. She didn't want to intrude on Edward, to make him feel that she was pushy, and while she didn't mind not knowing all of his secrets, she felt that maybe this was a secret that was better to be revealed …

"Are you ready?"

"Huh?" Bella's gaze shifted from the drawer to where Edward stood. He obviously didn't know that she caught him with that black kit.

"Are you ready, you know, to go see your dad?"

All concerns about the mysterious kit left her mind when she was brought back to reality. The nerves were beginning to bite again.

Bella sighed. "Ready as I'll ever be."

** x**

Bella tapped her fingers impatiently against her knee, while her other hand held onto Edward's as he drove down the freeway. She was biting her lip so much that she had to stop before she tore blood.

"Ouch," Edward muttered. "Bella, you want to ease up a little?"

"She looked at him curiously. "Ease up on what?"

"Your hand," He winced. "If you're trying to see how strong your grip is, congratulations, you've succeeded to a whole new level."

"Oh, I'm sorry," she replied sheepishly as she let go of Edward's hand. He shook it out, trying to encourage blood flow. "I didn't even realize how hard I was holding onto you."

"You don't need to apologize, Bella, I understand that you're nervous. I'm here for you in all the ways that I can be."

"I bet you're regretting your decision in making me your girlfriend, huh? With all my drama and emotions …"

"I don't know what I have to say to convince you how important you are to me," Edward said. He kept his eyes on the road, though there was a crease between his brows. "Is it because of how I treated you before? If that's it, then you have to know that I'm not the same person I was, in fact, I never was that person. What I was before was an asshole on the outside, and I guess I was kind of a dick on the inside, too, but I wasn't as bad. I'm a better person because of you, so please stop doubting my feelings."

Bella sighed, taking his hand again, this time rubbing small circles to soothe him. "I'll never understand why you care for me so much, Edward, but I'm happy that you do. This is all so new to me, and with my life being as unpredictable as it is, I'm glad I have you to keep me sane."

"I'll make you understand one day, Bella. I want to, no, I _need_ you to see how amazing you are. I –" Edward cut off, shaking his head. She wanted to know what he was about to say, but knew better than to push him. If he wanted to tell her something, he would. It would take some time, but he would tell her.

Instead, Bella gave Edward's hand a gentle squeeze and held it in her lap. They were in Malibu now, driving by so many beach houses that Bella couldn't believe that that many people lived with the beach as their backyard. For all of her seventeen years of life, her backyard had always been a forest. She couldn't imagine looking out her window everyday and not seeing green. She didn't know why the thought made her sad – she wanted to leave Forks, right?

Right. Bella most definitely wanted to leave Forks.

They were driving up a hill now, and she remembered when Alice told her that the amount of wealth could be seen from the houses the higher up the mountain you went. This surprised her, as Edward only kept driving higher and higher. The houses became grander, and Bella suddenly felt sick. Charles Garland had lived a rich life, and while she did as well, she was hoping that he wouldn't. That he lived in a bungalow and had a garden he was proud of. But as Edward pulled into the driveway that led to a white house that was the size of both their houses combined, Bella's heartbeat quickened.

"Breathe slowly, Bella. You can't hyperventilate now," Edward said gently as he put the car in park.

"I mean – I –" Bella was at a loss for words. "Is this the right house?"

"Well, it did say 'Garland' on the mailbox, so I'm guessing we found it alright."

"But, Edward, look at this house! How can someone so wealthy be my father?"

"I don't know, but why don't we go find out?" Before Bella could muster an answer, Edward was out of the car and opening the door, holding his hand out for her. "C'mon, Bella, when will you get this chance again?"

She wasn't so sure she wanted this chance at all, but she knew Edward was right. If she didn't find answers now, she never would, and that would become a great regret in her life. Sighing in defeat, Bella took Edward's hand and stepped out of the car. The weather was especially warm, and Bella was glad she had worn her dress. She patted it down with her hands and pulled her hair over to one side, making sure she looked put-together for this rich man who apparently was her father. Noticing that she was fidgeting, Edward draped his arm on her shoulders and kissed her temple. That was enough to tell her that she looked fine, and she relaxed a little.

The house was so white that Bella was sure someone cleaned it regularly. There were pillows on the front steps and a long veranda that wrapped around the house. There was a garden, but it was more grandeur than something she would have seen in Forks. There were hedges, and exotic flowers she didn't even know could bloom on this side of the world. All the windows were large, though the blinds were closed so people couldn't see inside. At this point, she desperately wanted to get a peek inside the house, but wasn't brave enough to actually go in.

"Edward, maybe we should –"

_Knock. Knock. Knock._

"_Edward_," Bella muttered. "Why did you do that? Oh my god, he probably isn't even home. We should go …"

"I can hear footsteps," Edward said turning his face to her. "We have to see him, Bella. If you don't like him after half an hour, then we'll go. Just say the word, and I'll get you out of there so fucking fast it'll be like we weren't even there in the first place. But _at least_ half an hour, okay?"

Before she could reply, the door swung open. Standing in front of her was a man, probably in his late thirties, with dark brown hair that was combed into place. He was wearing jeans and a band t-shirt, though he made it look sophisticated, even with his sneakers. Bella couldn't ignore his eyes, a deep brown that reminded her so much of her own. Phil had brown eyes, and she thought she had inherited hers from him, but she was wrong. There was no doubt in her mind that this was Charles.

"Charles Garland?" Edward asked, probably because he knew that Bella was too scared to say anything first.

Charles leaned against the doorframe and crossed his arms. "Can I help you?"

Edward was going to respond but Bella, surprising both Edward and her, spoke up.

"Seventeen years ago you had a daughter with a woman named Renee."

"Excuse me?" Charles stood straight now, his eyes narrowing.

"You've been fighting to meet her for a while now, but Renee has always denied you the chance."

"Look, I don't know who you think you are, but you need to get off my property before – "

"My name is Isabella Swan," She said, sounding more confident than she actually felt. Holding out her hand, Bella looked Charles straight in the eye. "It's nice to finally meet you."

At a loss for words, Charles seemed doubtful of Bella. He stared at her for a while, and then his face softened. He shook Bella's hand and held it for a long time. Bella wondered if it was her eyes that made him realize that she was telling the truth, or something else. Whatever it was, Charles seemed too shocked to speak. It wasn't until Edward put his hand on Bella's lower back did she break out of her trance and let go of Charles' hand.

"Can we come in?" Edward asked.

"Uh," Charles muttered. He nodded his head and stepped aside, gesturing his hand to welcome them in. "Of course, of course. Please, come in."

If Edward hadn't had his hand on Bella, gently pushing her inside, Bella would have stood on the veranda all day. As it was, she stepped through the doorway and was awestruck with how the house was nothing like she imagined. It was extravagant, yes, with a high crystal chandelier and a massive staircase being the first thing to see upon entering the house. The floor was a clean, white tile and the walls were cream. Bella's first thought was that the house was very bright. However, even though many aspects of the house told her that Charles had tons of money, other things told her that he was a simple man.

The furniture in Charles' home wasn't as pretentious like the furniture she grew up with. The paintings on the wall were all landscape, no abstract art with confusing lines and splatters of paint. The tables and the couches weren't black, but a rich brown that warmed the house. In fact, the entire place made her feel warm, and Bella wondered what it would have been like to grow up in a house like this instead of the cold place she never really felt welcome in.

Charles was leading them down a long hallway with pictures hanging on the wall. She saw photos of Charles shaking hands with people who must have held importance. There were pictures of him posing in the golf course. There were some pictures of his travels, but he was wearing a suit in all of those. Bella then realized what the photos had in common – they were all business. Charles had no photos of a family. He had some with friends, but Bella guessed that they were also his colleagues. She couldn't imagine living a life that had business in the center and everything else revolving around it. It was a lonely life, she thought. Bella had spent most of her life alone, as well. Up until recently, Bella and Charles had something in common.

"Half an hour," Edward whispered in her ear, seeming to think that she needed to be reminded.

Bella nodded in agreement.

"We can sit in the living room," Charles said as they approached a vast room with a fireplace, leather couches, and a very large flat screen TV. He then looked over his left shoulder unsurely. "Or we can go to the kitchen, it's up to you."

"The living room is fine," Bella said.

"Right, okay," He said awkwardly. "I'll be right back."

Once Charles was out of the room, Bella turned to Edward. "This was a bad idea."

"Are you serious? Bella, the way he was looking at you when you told him who you were – it was special. He obviously wants to spend time with you."

"You got all that from the way he looked at me?"

"And then some," Edward shrugged.

"That's such bull –" She cut off when Charles came into the room with a plate of food in his hand. When she saw what exactly was on the plate, she tilted her head curiously. "Cookies?"

Charles smiled sheepishly. "I should have asked if you were hungry, and even if you were I wasn't sure what you liked," He set the plate and brushed his hands off on his jeans. Gesturing towards the cookies, he said, "You used to love chocolate chip when you were a baby, so I just guessed …"

"Chocolate chip is my favorite," Bella said, touched that he remembered such a detail about her.

"Mine, too. Everyday after work I would carry you around the house and we'd eat cookies, but then one day …" Charles sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. "Should we sit?"

Bella was about to sit on the far end of the couch when Edward pulled her closer to the middle. Charles sat in a recliner that was not too far from her, but not too close either. She wished that Edward sat in between them, but instead he sat so she was in the middle. She was guessing he did this so that she would have to face the fact that she was about to talk to her biological father. It was interesting that Edward seemed to know Bella would not have been so forthcoming and would partially block herself with his body, but it also frustrated her because that's what she wanted to do and now felt so exposed.

There was an awkward silence. Bella wasn't the only one feeling it because she could see Charles' eyes scanning the ceiling, almost like he was looking for inspiration of what to say. Even Edward could feel the tension, and he gently grazed her hand to show that she needed to relax. She would have preferred it if he just took hold of her hand all together, but she guessed that Edward didn't want to be too affectionate in front of Charles.

"How did you find me?" Charles asked, being the first one to break the silence.

"Renee," Bella said.

"Obviously, but how did you come here by yourself?"

Did she really want to explain it all without understanding how everything came to this point? It would have been confusing and, honestly, she was selfish and wanted her questions answered before his. Bella felt she deserved it. "How about we start from the beginning – what happened between you and Renee?"

"She didn't tell you?"

"I didn't even know you existed until September."

A small gasp escaped his lips. "Jesus … then how …"

"Charles, I'll explain it all eventually. I just really need to understand what happened."

Charles swallowed.

"Uh, okay. Well, I went to college with your mother at UCLA, and we married the day after graduation. You were born about a year later –"

"I was born _here_?"

"If by here you mean California, then yes," His brow creased as he let her question sink in. "Where did you think you were born?"

How many more lies were out there? Bella sighed. "I was raised to believe that I had been in Forks my whole life."

"_What_?" Bella could see the pain in Charles' face then – it made her heart ache, too. They were both out of the loop for too long. He then stood and ran a hand through his neat hair. "I'll be right back. I just need some air."

Charles left the room in haste. She could hear the open and close of a door that was soon followed by a thud. She could only guess that he either punched or kicked the wall. Had she realized that this confrontation would be just as painful for Charles as it was for her, Bella would have approached this so much differently. Maybe she wouldn't have come at all, and spared him of all the hurt he was going through now. Bella hated that moment when she realized that she been lied to for so many years – she didn't want to do that to anybody else. And yet, that was exactly what she did.

"Bella," Edward said, laying a hand on her shoulder. "We don't have to stay. You've been here for half an hour – we can go now."

"I can't. Not now."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," Bella said. She turned her gaze to his and swallowed. "It's time for the truth to get out. No more secrets."

"Okay," Edward replied.

If Bella weren't so caught up in her mess, she would have asked Edward what was wrong. She noticed him flinch when she said she wanted to eliminate any secrets. It bothered her, but not as much as it should, for she had to take care of one problem at a time.

* * *

**Hi guys! Sorry for the wait, but many of you told me not to update while my first year of uni was coming to a close, and study my ass off for finals instead. I did just that, and now I can write freely for the next four months! WOOT!**

**Please don't hate me for not putting the whole visit onto this chapter ... otherwise it would have been too long and, honestly, I need to take my time editing the next chapter because it has to be _perfect_!**

**These are the books I've read since I last updated:**

**1) Bloodlines by Richelle Mead**

**2) the Golden Lily by Richelle Mead**

**3) the Indigo Spell by Richelle Mead**

**4) Gabriel's Inferno by Sylvain Reynard**

**5) Gabriel's Rapture by Sylvain Reynard (still can't believe that these books were a Twilight fanfic too)**

**6) Crush by Nicole Williams**

**7) Warm Bodies by Isaac Marion**

**8) The Selection by Kiera Cass (I actually had to re-read this because I read it last year and the second one just released last month)**

**9) The Elite by Kiera Cass (literally finished this two hours ago and am STILL FRUSTRATED ... in a good way)**

**Okay, that's all for now! See you at the next update. REVIEW PLEASE!**

**Much love,**

**Karina.**


	30. Chapter Thirty: Belonging

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own Demi Lovato's new album (which is AWESOME, by the way).

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Chapter Thirty: Belonging

_**Bella**_

Bella nibbled on the cookies as she and Edward waited for Charles to come back. She felt guilty that she had spurred such a reaction in him. It reminded her of when she found out that Phil wasn't her father, and that Renee had been feeding her with lies. It was easy to forget that Renee was also lying to Charles, telling him that Bella didn't want to visit him, even if she was legally allowed to meet him. Running away from the problem seemed only logical, which is why she ran into the woods that night. Charles had run to the back porch, no doubt, but Bella still hoped he wouldn't react as irrationally as she did. Bella finding that piece of glass and acting on thoughts of suicide was an impulse. She wasn't suicidal – cutting her wrist that night was the result of all her pent up sadness and loneliness. The reason why she always felt so alone was revealed, and Bella couldn't accept it.

Now she could see her wrongs from that night, and Bella had to make up for them.

Getting up from the couch, she told Edward to stay put while she went to Charles. Of course Edward offered to come with her, but Bella shook her head. This was something that she needed to do alone. Edward grabbed her hand once before she left, giving it a gentle squeeze, and then let it go. It was the smallest act, but Bella felt it's meaning immensely. It was to comfort her, to wish her luck. Edward didn't need to say anything, and just looked at her to confirm that he truly meant it. Her heart fluttered and she gave him a thankful smile before she turned and walked out of the living room.

Bella thought she was already lost the minute she was out of Edward's sight. Charles' house had so many hallways and doors that she didn't know where to begin. She chose to fallow the hallway that was lined with windows, giving a view of the water high above the ground. It was beautiful, and at that moment Bella could really see herself living here – to wake up in the sunshine and walk down sunlit hallways with ease. No more cloudy days and never-ending green. No more shopping that included the words: _will this last in the rain?_ No more classmates who only talk to you if they needed something from you. She could pretend that Renee and Phil didn't exist and be happy with her life.

But she couldn't _really_ run away. Phil and Renee were still out there, somewhere in Canada, and could at any moment decide they want to come back and ruin her life again. And she also wondered about Alice and Edward – the two people she trusted more than anyone. Alice was the first person to be around her just because she _wanted_ to, and didn't give a crap about high school politics. Bella hadn't realized how empty she was until she had Alice – she was her best friend, and Bella was thankful.

Edward was different. It still boggled her mind that they used to hate each other so much that they couldn't stand to look at the other without sneering. Now whenever Bella caught Edward looking at her she felt she could melt in his gaze. It was warm and gentle, caring and reassuring. She wondered how she looked at him, if she had a similar look in her eyes. While Alice filled her heart with friendship, Edward set it ablaze. She could feel its slow burn sizzle from her toes to the ends of her hair. To not have the two people who made her feel whole by her side would be more torture than it was before she knew them, for before the night in the woods she had never experienced affection. Now that she had, Bella didn't want to live through life _remembering_ what it was like to feel whole, to have memories of it – she wanted to continue living with it contentedly.

At the end of the hallway were two white doors. Bella couldn't get over how light the house was – how welcome it made her feel. She was still basking in the warmth of the hallway and admiring the view from the windows when she approached the doors. Bella hesitantly grabbed both knobs and took a deep breath, she didn't know what was behind it, but she prayed that it wasn't another hallway. Getting lost would seriously suck, and having to call Edward to come find her would be embarrassing, probably because he would get lost, too. She laughed at the thought and its ridiculousness, mostly because there was a real possibility it would happen. Bella shook her head and gripped the doorknobs tighter before twisting them and pushing the doors wide open.

If Bella thought that the view from the windows was lovely, she was wrong. She was met with a blast of air; warm yet cool, and the view of the vast water below. She could see the beach – it looked so small. They were so high up that she could see rows upon rows of houses that were also on the mountain. Bella felt like she was on top of the world.

"You went the long way," Charles said. She was so invested in the view that she didn't even notice him leaning against the railing.

"I didn't even know where I was going, let alone there being two ways to get here," Bella replied, stepping onto the porch with eyes only on the ocean. "But the way I went was amazing."

"I prefer that way, too. It's the windows."

Bella nodded, though she knew he couldn't see her since his back faced her. She walked up beside him, though she stood at least a foot away, and leaned on the railing. She inhaled a shaky breath.

"I'm sorry I stormed out like that," Charles said. "This isn't how I planned our first meeting after sixteen years."

"I'm seventeen."

The corner of Charles mouth lifted. "I know. I remember the day you were born like it was yesterday. I got to spend one beautiful year with you, and then you were gone …"

"… For sixteen years," Bella finished for him.

"Yeah," He said, sadly. She could feel him watching her, but she was too nervous to stare back. Instead, she tried to focus on the different shades of blue as the ocean went farther and farther. "I didn't realize that you didn't know about me, that you didn't know where you came from. That threw me off." He sighed; finally taking his eyes off her. "I guess I'll start where I left off. After you were born, your mother and I still lived in our small apartment in Valencia. It's a great community, but our apartment wasn't the best. Your mother wanted more, and knew I had the potential to make it happen. My father was the CEO of Garland Transportation, dealing mostly with oil and gas. I worked within the company, but only in the shadows. I made decent money, but not enough for us to move out of that apartment. I was the next in line to take over, but I had to wait for him to retire before I could take his place.

Then my father, your grandfather, died – heart attack. He never did watch what he was eating, and on top of the smoking? Hell, he didn't stand a chance. But still, I loved my old man, and becoming CEO by default of death seemed wrong. I didn't know if I could do it, though Renee assured me that I could, that she was there to help me through it all. I loved your mother, Isabella; I would believe anything she told me. I started out slowly, feeling my way in my new position, but still had doubts.

Renee and I had a fight a couple of months after, claiming that the reason I was so hesitant about taking on my dad's role was because I didn't want to provide for the family, for you. She couldn't have been more wrong – I would have done anything for you. So the next day I poured my heart and soul into being a CEO. The board was thrilled that I had finally accepted that I was to take over, and it was my best day at work since Dad died. I couldn't wait to go home and tell Renee how the day went, to show her how much I loved the both of you and to thank her for pushing me into becoming greater. But then …"

Charles paused, taking slow breaths. Bella could see how difficult this was for him and she desperately wanted to reach out and hold his hand, but refrained. She couldn't see herself being born here, to have lived her first year in Valencia. Charles said he loved Renee, and she must have felt the same way to have married him. Bella wondered what their life would have been like if Renee and Bella had stayed.

"You don't have to finish," Bella said. "I get the idea."

Charles shook his head. "No it's okay. It's just that I've tried very hard to forget that day – talking about it is hard," He cleared his throat and stood a little taller. "When I got home, the first thing I noticed was how quiet it was. I couldn't hear Renee cooing at you, or your feet clumsily walking along the floor. I thought you two had gone out, but then I found the letter on the coffee table. It was my worst nightmare – Renee had fallen for someone else, someone with more money and who would be fully committed to the both of you, and that she didn't want me to see you for a while."

"Is that even legal? Taking away a parent's right to see their child?"

"It is when someone files for divorce and asks for full custody."

"Didn't you fight it?"

"To the very end," Charles rubbed the back of his neck, shifting his gaze from the ocean to the sky. "The judge decided that a child needs their mother, and that if she claimed that having full custody would be better for you, then so be it. It was bullshit. However, the judge also saw that I was now more than capable of providing for you and had a clean record. He decided that once you turned sixteen, I had the right to see you again, so long as you wanted it. I'm pretty sure he either pulled that verdict out of his ass, or someone paid him."

Bella didn't even blink before she came to the conclusion. "Phil."

"That bastard – I always assumed it was him. I had no way to prove it, and that verdict was the best shot I had at seeing you before you left home. If you went away somewhere, I would never know. I called your house the day you turned sixteen. Renee answered, but I could hear you talking in the background. God, you sounded so grown up, I almost forgot that I was on the phone at all. When I asked Renee if I could speak with you, she said that you didn't want to talk to me – that you weren't ready. I was heartbroken."

"I didn't even know who you were," Bella said softly. "If I had known you were my dad, I would have grabbed that phone with so much excitement."

"I'm sure Renee had a reason to keep me a secret, I don't like it, but she must have had a reason. I'm sure she felt that Phil was a better father."

"He wasn't though – he was awful," This was it – the part of the conversation that she was dreading the most. She gulped and willed herself not to cry. "Phil had a temper, and I displeased him a lot. He basically wanted me out of the house once I went to college, I was so willing to oblige. I didn't go a week without getting pushed, kicked, or having things thrown at me. He spoke to me like I was garbage. My whole life I believed that I did something wrong, that I was such a disgrace that not even my own dad could accept it."

Charles was gripping the railing so hard that his knuckles were turning white. "I'm going to kill him."

Bella continued. "I found out about you by accident. I was cleaning the floors and knocked over the mail with my mop. I didn't want it to get wet because I knew Phil would be upset so I cleaned it up so fast. I caught my name on one of them and was curious – I never get mail. I didn't expect to find that Phil isn't really my father and that my actual dad was trying so hard to communicate with me. I confronted Renee about it, but she wouldn't tell me where you were. And when Phil found out, well …"

She didn't feel like she needed to say anymore.

"I'm going to kill him," Charles said again. "I'm going to fly to Forks and kill him."

She was about to tell him that he didn't need to go to Forks when Charles embraced her. Bella never had a hug from a parent that made her feel this way – like she was protected. Bella always had to fend for herself. A tear escaped, and then two and three, and she wrapped her arms around him and pulled him closer. Charles was mumbling sweet things into her hair; telling her that he was sorry and that he wished he could take back time and find a way to stop Renee from taking her from him. Bella wanted all those things, too, but she knew she couldn't. Everything that happened to her made her become the person she was today – Bella couldn't imagine being a different version of herself.

Bella didn't know who needed the comforting more – her or Charles. When she heard him sniffle, she decided that she needed to be strong for both of them. So she hugged him fiercely and let him cry into her hair. There was no doubt that Charles would have been a wonderful father, and that she wanted to spend more time with him. She may not have been able to erase the past, but she could pave the way for a better future. She wanted Charles in her life, to make up for all the time they spent apart and to live life truthfully – never in lies.

"You must think this is strange," Charles murmured. "Hugging a man who you just met."

"I don't think it's strange at all. In fact, it finally feels like I'm with my family."

She heard Charles sniffle again. "I'm going to make this right, Isabella. I swear to you, I will."

"You can call me Bella," she said.

"I used to call you Bells," Charles said – she could feel him smile against her. "Is that okay?" Bella nodded. No one had called her that before, however, she could picture Charles calling her that. It even made her happy. "And, Bells?"

"Yeah?"

"I know you're not ready to call me Dad, but until you are, you can call me Charlie."

Bella grinned. "Okay."

** x**

They sat on the porch for the rest of her stay. Bella told Charlie about how Renee and Phil had fled to Canada to escape their fate, since the Cullen's knew what went on inside their house. Charlie was upset with this, she could tell by the way he bit the inside of his cheek and balled his hands into fists. She gave him Detective Newton's number when he asked for it, and told him that there hasn't been any update in the last month or so. She explained how the Cullen family had taken her in without hesitation and that if anyone else were her neighbor they would have turned away. She left out her high school drama because she felt that Charlie didn't need to know that she had been miserable both in and outside of her home. Bella did tell Charlie that Edward and Alice were the two people she was closest to, and that made him relax a little. She guessed that he was relieved to know that she wasn't alone.

Bella reassured him that it wasn't always bad. He understood when she said that the quietest times were the best times because no one could hurt her. She told him that she got those moments a lot, especially when Renee and Phil went on vacation and left her behind. This didn't seem to appease him that much, but she continued to explain that she was happier now than she had ever been. With Phil and Renee leaving, Bella found that there were good people out there. She realized that she was a lot stronger than she thought she was. When Bella said that she was happy that they fled, because it led her to him, Charlie started tearing up. He hugged her close again, and she rested her head on his shoulder.

Sitting like that, Bella could see herself living with him. She was old enough to know right from wrong, but she was sure Charlie still had some parenting that he wanted to do.

"So what happens now?" Bella asked, her head still resting on Charlie's shoulder.

"Well, when do you go back to Forks?"

"The day after the New Year."

"Hmm," Charlie mumbled. She could hear him spitting numbers and days under his breath. "I can't leave the office in the next two weeks, but I can definitely be in Forks by the sixteenth."

"To what, visit?" Bella liked the idea of Charlie visiting. She didn't like Forks, but she would show him around the small town and then maybe they could go to Seattle …

"No, to live there," Bella sat up, looking at him curiously. "You're in my life again, Bells, I don't want to miss anymore moments with you. I've already missed so much. I would rather you stay here, but I figure you want to finish the school year first. Plus, I would like to talk to this Detective Newton and see what is being done. I have an excellent lawyer, and when we finally catch that bastard, and your mom, I want justice."

"That all sounds great, but are you sure you want to _live_ in Forks? It's a small town, nothing compared to this," She said, gesturing around her.

"It doesn't matter where I am; I just want to be with my daughter. Unless you need time and would rather do visits."

"No!" Bella said, though she blushed since she said it a lot louder than she meant to. "I mean, I want you there, of course. I'm just making sure. The Cullen's have been great to me, and I am so thankful, but I think it's time I stay with a family member who actually wants me."

Charlie's eye softened. "I've wanted you since you were born, Bells. Living through each day knowing that I might have missed an important moment in your life, killed me."

"So I guess it's settled, then. Are you sure you can find a place to live and make arrangements at work by the sixteenth?"

"I'll have to start searching for places that are renting, but I'm the CEO of Garland Transportation – I can work anywhere," That was enough for Bella, and she grinned like an idiot. "So about that boy, you say he's a Cullen?"

Bella's smile disappeared. "Yeah, um, Edward's kind of my boyfriend."

"Kind of?" Charlie grunted. "Since when?"

"Um, a couple of days ago." God, could this get anymore awkward?

Charlie stood up. "I think I'm going to have a chat with him," When Bella groaned, he shook his head. "Now, Bells, I've been denied so many things when it comes to you, at least let me talk to your boyfriend."

How could she say no when he said things like that?

Bella nodded in defeat. "Just don't embarrass me."

Charlie threw his head back and laughed. "Oh, Bells, what kind of father would I be if I didn't?"

He went inside, then, and Bella was tempted to follow him and make sure that whatever was being said wasn't going to make her cheeks burn. And yet, the more she thought about it, she didn't really want to know what Charlie had to say. In the short amount of time that they had together, Bella had more trust in him than she did Renee. So she sat back on the bench and crossed her legs. It was late afternoon now, pink and orange beginning to leak into the ends of the blue sky. She thought about what it would be like to sit here every day, to spend the last little bit of the day outside before the sun disappeared into the ocean. This trip made her realize how much she wanted to leave Forks. It also made her realize how much she would be leaving behind.

Bella didn't pay attention to how long Charlie was gone for. She just breathed in the California air, its warmth beginning to cool. She tried to picture Alice living here – what her life must have been like. Bella wondered if Alice ever just stared out the window and admired the sunset. She was so lost in her own thoughts that she didn't notice she was no longer alone on the porch until a hand touched her shoulder.

"Hey," Edward said. She looked at him and smiled. "How are you?"

"I'm good – I'm glad that I came," She wanted to reach for his hand, but stopped when she noticed that Charlie, not too far away, was watching them. "I'm sorry you were by yourself for so long."

"It's okay, I understand."

"What time is your family coming home?"

Edward glanced at his phone. "In about an hour, I think."

"I guess we should go then," Bella sighed. She didn't want to go, but understood that she had to. Charlie did, too, since he came over and hugged Bella.

"I'll call you soon," Charlie said. She was about to tell him that she hadn't given him her number when he added: "Edward gave me your number."

She glanced back at Edward, who shrugged. Now that she wasn't admiring the view, she was curious to know what Charlie and her boyfriend were talking about. Charlie let go of her and led the two of them to the front door. Bella still couldn't believe that Charlie lived in the place alone. This time, however, Charles didn't go through the two white doors that led to the hallway of windows. Instead, he walked past it and opened a brown door that led to another room – Bella guessed this was his office. She tried to memorize every detail of it, but she couldn't focus because too soon they stepped through the door that led to another hallway. This one had no pictures on the wall – it was a blank canvas. Charlie made a right and stepped into another door that led to the kitchen, and then brought them back to the living room. This was familiar to her now, and soon she was walking through the business-like photographed hallway and stepping into the foyer.

Edward and Charlie were making small talk as they all walked. Bella wasn't surprised that they got on so well – Edward was very charismatic. They were talking about cars when they reached the door, and Charlie asked, "Bells, did you ever get my birthday gift to you for your sweet sixteen?"

"Gift?"

"Yeah, I got you an Audi convertible."

Bella's eyes widened. "That was from _you_?"

Renee had told her that it was a belated sixteenth birthday present from her. She should have known it was a lie, but then again, she was hidden from the truth for a long time. Bella always wondered why Renee got her such a nice car, since she had been driving a piece-of-crap truck for so long. The fact that it came from Charlie made so much more sense. Of course he got her a convertible – he wasn't aware of how little she would put the top down because it rained almost every day.

She was going to thank him when the doorbell rang.

"Ah," Charlie scratched his head. "I forgot my assistant was coming over today."

"You have an assistant?" Edward asked.

"I'm the CEO – I need one," Charlie explained nonchalantly. He opened the door and standing there was a boy who must have been their age. He had blonde hair and kind blue eyes. He had a little bit of a tan and was dressed casually in jean shorts and a t-shirt. "Jasper, you're on time!"

"Aren't I always?" the boy, Jasper, joked. Bella noticed he had a nice smile.

Charlie shook his head and laughed. Patting Jasper on the shoulder, he gestured for him to step in. "I want you to meet my daughter. This is Bella. Bells, this is Jasper Whitlock."

Jasper Whitlock – something about that name sounded familiar.

"It's a pleasure," Jasper said, extending his hand. She could tell that he was surprised to hear that Charlie had a child – he probably didn't mention her before.

She took his hand. "You, as well."

Edward introduced himself quickly before leading Bella out of the house. She gave her goodbye to Charlie and he promised to call her later in the evening. If someone told her earlier that she would be sad when leaving Charlie, she would have guessed that it was because the meeting had gone so horribly. But it was the opposite – she was disappointed to have left because she finally fit another piece of a puzzle into her life, and he was wonderful.

Bella rolled her eyes when Edward opened the car door for her. No matter how many times she told him that he didn't need to do so, it didn't matter. Edward liked doing it. Settling into the car, she waved as Charlie closed his front door, and he waved quickly before it was shut. Edward got in the car and turned on the ignition. It was almost six o'clock – they had spent the majority of the day at Charlie's. Now that they were alone, Bella grabbed Edward's hand and sighed. She missed his touch. Edward brought her hand to his lips and placed a gentle kiss – he must have missed it, too.

"Thank you for making me go today, even when I was so nervous that I didn't want to."

"Anything for you, Bella," Edward said softly. He gave her a quick smile before turning his gaze back to the road. "Did you find the answers you were looking for?"

"I did," Bella said. "Charlie is moving to Forks on the sixteenth."

Edward stayed silent for a while. She watched as he licked his lips. "I know, and while I'm sad that you won't be living with us anymore, I understand. Besides, it's not like I won't see you. I'm going to spend so much time with you that you'll get sick of me."

Bella laughed, but she knew that she would never get tired of Edward. "What did Charlie say to you?"

"Oh, we had the usual, father-boyfriend conversation. He made sure my intentions were in the right place and that I was treating you right."

"You are, you know," Bella said. "Treating me right, that is."

Edward dared another glance at Bella and looked at her with an expression she couldn't name. "I'm glad to hear it."

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_**Before anything: I know the verdict is bullshit - that's the point. *Hint Hint***_

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**Twitter: KarinaCullen**

**Tumblr(s): addictedbooker (book blog); i-nfiniteinspiration (personal blog)**

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How good was I with the speed of this update? Pretty amazing? I know!

Some of you asked me how I got so much reading done with school and work. Here's my trick: I don't let things like finals and stuff stop me from reading. I don't read as much, but I read when I can. I also don't drive to school because I don't want to pay for parking, so I read on the bus as well. I read before I go to bed. I read while I make food. Basically, nothing stops me from being sucked into a book. It doesn't work for everybody, like lots of people stop reading when it comes to finals, but I can't do that. I'm weird haha.

I only read one book since I last updated: The Marriage Bargain by Jennifer Probst (I didn't really like it ...).

Anyways! I hope you all are doing well, and I'll see you next time :)

Much Love,

Karina


	31. Chapter Thirty One: Mistake

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a new bookshelf (it's beautiful).

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Chapter Thirty-One: Mistake

_**Edward**_

Bella seemed to be more at ease after their visit with Charlie, and everyone had noticed. His grandma was happy that Bella seemed to have such a great time, but she didn't know Bella's story. It was his mother who noticed it first. She had asked Edward why Bella was so cheery all of a sudden.

"It's not that I don't want her happy," Mom added. "It's just that she seemed so on edge earlier on this trip. Do you know what happened?"

"I haven't got a clue," Edward said, not looking straight at her.

"You do," She said, seeing through his lie.

"I really don't."

"Edward …"

"I'm just going to hang with Dad."

He had escaped from his Mom as quickly as he could. Edward couldn't help the guilt that filled him about lying – she only wanted to understand Bella because she cared for her so much. He tried to put enough space between him and his mother to prevent any more questions. It would be hard to explain why Bella was happier, since they didn't know about Charlie and their adventure to reconcile his relationship with his daughter. It would be a long ass story, one that Bella needed to give the green light to tell. Edward knew that it would happen eventually, but he didn't want to push her. He figured she needed time.

Edward remembered Bella's laugh filling the room when his grandma told the punch line to her story. It was a beautiful sound, damn it, and it had to be ruined when he felt his father clap his hand on Edward's shoulder and mention how much Bella seemed to be enjoying herself. Edward had nodded, agreeing with his dad without seeming suspicious. He didn't understand why his parents had to go through him first when it came to Bella. It wasn't like Bella couldn't answer for herself – he wasn't a fucking mediator. He would do anything for Bella, but that didn't mean he didn't think she could handle whatever came to her. She was brave, even if she didn't think so.

"So your mother and I know," Dad had said, bluntly.

Edward stiffened, and he hoped that it was subtle enough for his dad not to notice. He tried to play it cool. "Know what?"

_Oh shit,_ Edward thought, _we are so fucked_. Different scenarios of how his parents could have found out about Charlie ran through his mind, and he was trying not to freak out. He didn't get in trouble often. People assumed that Edward didn't give a fuck about getting grounded or some shit like that, but he did. So now he was trying to find the right words to lighten the punishment …

Carlisle chuckled and gave Edward a wink.

The _fuck_?

"You" – he pointed at Edward – "and Bella" – he pointed at Bella – "dating," Carlisle laughed and slung his arm over his son's shoulders. Edward figured he had a couple beers prior to this, because he was too laidback to have this kind of conversation. "How long did you think it would take for us to find out?"

_Holy Shit._

"Edward, watch your mouth," Carlisle chastised.

"Um, sorry," Edward didn't realize he actually said that out loud. He blinked one, two, three times before he realized that his dad wasn't kidding. He felt embarrassed, not because of Bella, but because the situation had just gotten really fucking awkward. "I don't know what to say."

"As long as the both of you are responsible and don't do it in the house –"

"We don't – I mean – we haven't …"

"– Then your mother and I are fine with it. Starting tomorrow you two aren't allowed to be in each other's rooms without the door wide open. Do I make myself clear?"

"Crystal," Edward nodded. He avoided eye contact with his dad – the situation was already so weird. He detached himself from the conversation and as he walked away all he could think was _awkward, awkward, _and_ so fucking awkward_.

Edward would never forget that night. _Ugh_.

It had been a week since they came back from California and already it was time to go back to school. Edward kept reliving that embarrassment for days – it never slipped his mind. When he had told Bella about it she was surprisingly calm. Well, at first she started freaking out about what his parents thought of them being together, but once Edward assured her that they were more than fine– aside from them doing the dirty in the house – she relented. However, now she was much more cautious in the house, in fear that either his mom or dad would walk in during one of their moments. It sucked major balls, but he got why she was so hesitant.

That meant he made sure Bella made up for it when they were outside the house. By now the entire town must have seen the two of them holding hands or Edward pulling her in for a kiss. He used to hate couples that showed too much affection among the general public – now he was on a level of understanding with them. Edward couldn't seem to get enough of Bella, especially since she was so shy when it came to PDA. Fucking adorable, that one was.

He ripped the sheets off his body and cursed when he realized how cold his room was. Edward glanced at the window and groaned when he saw that he left it open last night. Walking across the room in haste, he pulled the window down and gave it a glare. No one deserved to wake up to the frigid morning air. However, Edward did have to admit that he was wide awake now, and decided that he should take a quick shower before Bella took her turn, since she took fucking forever.

Edward scratched his head as he made his way to the bathroom – he couldn't hear any movement coming from Bella's room. He assumed that she was still asleep, and decided that if she wasn't up by the time he was out of the shower he would wake her up himself. Edward loved the idea of waking her up with soft kisses and whispers in her ear, but rejected the idea once he remembered that he had to keep the door open. If he got caught waking Bella up so intimately, he didn't know who it would be more awkward for – him, Bella, or his parents.

_Shudder_.

It was already embarrassing enough that he had to relieve himself in the shower every morning – he didn't need his parents getting a view of his morning wood. If they did then they might not even let him and Bella in the same room at all– in fear that his hormones would cloud his judgment. And maybe his hormones did, sometimes, but usually he knew when to hold himself back. Though it was getting harder and harder the more he and Bella got more intimate. Bella was getting comfortable with him now – never hesitating to grab his hand or run her hands on his chest and down to his abdomen. Edward wasn't sure if she was aware of the effect she had on him, but hell … it was working.

After taking a shower and brushing his teeth, Edward wrapped the towel around his waist and stepped out of the bathroom. This time he wasn't welcomed with cold air, and was grateful that the heater was working. He still heard nothing from Bella's room, but decided to change into clothes before waking her up. Being caught in Bella's room with nothing but a towel covering his lower half would be even more awkward.

_Shudder_.

He stepped into the confines of his room and closed the door behind him. Edward dropped the towel and pulled on a pair of briefs before selecting dark jeans and a white V-neck t-shirt. Goosebumps started to appear so Edward quickly grabbed the forest green cardigan off the hanger and slipped it on, not bothering to button it up. Edward ran a hand through his damp hair and decided that it was decent before grabbing his backpack and making his way to Bella's room. Edward thought it was strange that he couldn't hear a sound – she was usually almost ready to go to school at this time. He knocked twice, waiting for her to answer her door. There was no reply, so he hesitantly pushed the door open. The bed was made, and the blinds were open. Her closet was closed and her backpack was nowhere in sight – she must have gotten up early.

Edward bounded down the stairs, the smell of breakfast encouraging his hunger. He was expecting to see Bella sitting at the table, talking to his mother, like she did every morning, but was surprised to not see her at all.

"Where's Bella?" Edward asked as he set his backpack on the floor.

"She left about half an hour ago," His mother answered. Edward tried to hide his disappointment – they almost always drove to school together. "Something about much-needed girl time with Alice."

Edward nodded in understanding, if not in relief. He feared that Bella would be more hesitant to be with him at school since they were a couple now, though he should have known better than that. During their trip Edward could tell that Bella missed Alice, and while he knew that Bella liked spending time with him, she also needed her best friend. He heard his mom chuckle as he scooped some eggs onto his plate. Edward pretended to ignore it, because if he showed that he heard it then he would get a wink or even a knowing smile. God only knew how much he wished his parents didn't know about his relationship with Bella.

"Aren't you going to be late for school?"

Edward glanced at the clock and almost swore out loud. "I better get going," He stuffed the rest of his eggs in his mouth and downed the orange juice. He was about to kiss his mom goodbye when she held out his black kit.

"Forgetting something?"

Edward sighed, taking it into his hands. "Sorry – I just wanted to see Bella before class started; otherwise I won't see her until lunch."

His mom touched his arm. "That's fine sweetheart, and while I'm glad that you and Bella are happy, I just want to make sure that you don't forget about your health. If your relationship with her is making you forget that you have …"

"Mom," Edward said. "I forgot this one time."

"What if I wasn't here this time, Edward? You need to be more careful."

"I know, I know. I'm sorry," Edward said. He unzipped the kit and made sure his mother watched until he was finished. He didn't mean to make her worry, but knew that it was his own fault. Even worse, he had lied. Edward had forgotten to do his intake on one other occasion – in California. It was right before he and Bella left to meet Charlie. Edward had told Bella that he was feeling nauseous, which was true, but he didn't tell her why. Getting her out of the kitchen in order to take the dosage was tricky since she was so concerned. Again, it was his fault – he shouldn't have forgotten it in the first place.

In a way his mother was right – being with Bella made him feel invincible, any thought of health never crossed his mind. And while he should tell Bella about why he had a doctor's appointment once a month, why he needed that black kit, he just couldn't. Edward was a fucking pussy. He couldn't even tell Rosalie when they were close – she still didn't know. No one knew outside of his parents and doctors, and though Edward knew it was nothing to be ashamed of …He just couldn't bring himself to open that part of him. That vulnerable piece of himself.

Edward made it to school ten minutes before the bell rang, and once he was parked he got out of his car and jogged to the front doors. He passed by people greeting him in hopes of catching Bella at her locker before she went to her first class. By this time the halls were flooded with students. He had to push his way through people, who kept asking how his winter break went, to make it to Bella's locker. When he finally made it he saw Bella leaning against her locker, laughing at something Alice said.

"Hey, you," Edward said, hugging Bella from behind. He whispered in her ear, "I missed you this morning."

Bella giggled. "I'm sure you did." She turned her head up to say something else but he cut her off by putting his mouth on hers. She quickly reciprocated, drawing him in closer …

"Oh, _bleh_. You guys are fucking disgusting. You couldn't have waited for me to leave?"

Edward pulled away to see Alice shaking her head at them. He could tell that Bella was blushing, but he laughed anyways. He only pulled Bella in closer.

"Okay," Alice said. "I'm going to go before you guys start going crazy in front of my innocent eyes. I'll catch you in French class, B."

"I'll see you," Bella said. Once Alice was lost in the crowd of students, Bella turned around and shook her head. "I'm not sure how I feel about this whole PDA thing."

"Why? I, for one, am quite happy showing the world that you're my girlfriend."

"Edward, has anyone told you that you're a very, um, _loving_ boyfriend?"

"No, but that might be because I've never been a boyfriend before."

Bella stared. "You've never been in a relationship?"

"Never," Edward replied. He took Bella's hand in his and leaned against the lockers. "I know you think that I was a player, but I really wasn't. It was the façade I put up. So believe me when I say that you're very special."

The bell rang before Bella could answer. He knew that she was going to say that she wasn't "anything special" or some shit like that, but he vowed to make sure she would believe it one day. He gave her a chaste kiss goodbye before telling her that he would see her at lunch, and then went on his way. There were few students in the hall now, Laurent and Kate met him halfway to class and walked with him, asking about his break. Edward was about to reply when he saw Rosalie, closing her locker door and staring in Bella's direction. As he passed she turned her gaze to him.

He didn't understand why Rose looked so hurt.

"Hey, guys," Edward said, making Laurent and Kate stop mid-step. "I just forgot something at my locker – I'll see you in class?"

"No problem, Edward," Kate replied. "We'll make sure to save your seat."

Edward nodded, watching as his two friends continued their way to class. He waited until they rounded the corner and was no longer in sight before he turned around. Edward wanted to talk to Rose – he was still pissed at her, but couldn't deny the guilt he felt when he saw how upset she was. He knew that she was feeling so because of what he had done, but it was all a result from her actions. As justified as he was for never speaking to Rose again, Edward couldn't let go of the saddened expression she held not too long ago. He hated that he could still feel bad for Rose, after everything that she did, but he couldn't just forget years of friendship.

Rose was grabbing her books when he approached her. When she looked up, she seemed surprised, but only for a second before she scowled.

"Go away, Edward. You've made it very clear that you don't want anything to do with me," Her tone was more accusatory than angry.

"So, what, you call me during break to wish me happy holidays and now you're going to blow me off? I don't come to you at your command, Rose – you don't set the fucking time and place that we get to talk," Edward shook his head, taking one step back. "Maybe this was a mistake."

"No, wait," Rose said, grabbing his arm when he took one more step in the other direction. "I'm sorry," She let go of him and sighed, giving him a hopeless stare. "Walk with me to class?"

Edward nodded once, standing still as she shut her locker and adjusted her backpack onto one shoulder. They walked in silence – which was very unusual for Rose since she always had something to say. They used to never be in shortage of conversation, but now Edward didn't even know how to start. Out of the corner of his eye he could see that Rose hadn't dressed to impress – also quite unusual. He wasn't going to lie – Rose had a great body, and she dressed to accentuate what she had. That's why he found it strange to find her in yoga pants and a hoodie, instead of her skinny jeans and a tank top. Rose also looked tired; a slight hint of circles under her eyes and her blonde hair up in a ponytail told him she didn't get much sleep.

They were approaching the classroom when Rosalie said, "So you and the Du – um, Bella, huh?"

"What about us?"

"Don't be coy, Edward. Is she your girlfriend now?"

"Yeah," He nodded, not knowing how else to elaborate. "If you gave her a chance, Rose, maybe you two could get along."

"I don't think I could do it."

"Why not?"

"Look," Rose stopped just a few feet away from the door. She looked at him with that same hurt expression. "I'm sorry for all the shit I did and what came out of it. I'm not going to lie – I did it for my own benefit, and I see how wrong it was to think like that. I'm not willing to tell you the reason for what transpired, at least not yet, but I can't stand not having you in my life."

"Rose …"

"Please?"

"I'm still pissed off, Rose. I don't know if I can ever forgive you."

"I know you are," Rose shrugged, looking defeated. "Just think about it, okay?"

Edward didn't know what to say – he had no idea what to do. Instead he nodded his head, and watched as Rose gave him a weak smile before going into class. The Rose he knew was strong and had a no-bullshit attitude. This Rose was vulnerable, foreign. He didn't know how to approach her, or if he wanted to at all.

x

The thing about going back to school was that no one wanted to do shit – not even the teachers. Of course, everyone had to suck it up eventually, but the first couple of days were slack. Edward must have watched a movie in almost every class to "refresh" their minds about what they had learned before winter break. It was total bullshit when you saw your teachers' texting or reading a magazine, or they just straight up left the room. Students took advantage of this – how could they not? It got progressively worse the later it got in the day, and now Edward was sitting in European History watching _Braveheart_ because Mr. Dirk "forgot" the movie he was supposed to bring in.

"Yo, man," Alec whispered, leaning over his desk. "This is bullshit."

Edward sighed. "You took the words right out of my mouth."

"Then how about we ditch this shithole and go home?"

"I can't, man."

"Look," Alec leaned in closer. "I understand that you're smart and whatnot, but what happened to the Edward who would have skipped class in a heartbeat?"

"I'm still here, douche bag," Edward replied quietly. "I have no problem with cutting class; it's just that Bella didn't drive to school today so she's riding with me."

"Oh, _riding_. Okay, I get it –don't have to be so discreet."

"I … what?" Edward mumbled. Alec winked at him and laughed. "Don't be such an ass, Alec. We haven't done anything, and even if we did I wouldn't tell you. That's private."

"Are you serious? Hey, don't look at me like that – your glares are fucking scary. All I'm saying is that with the way you and Bella are around each other, well, it makes me think otherwise. Not just me either."

"What? Who the fuck thinks that?"

"Everyone, dude. But hey, don't pay attention to that – it doesn't matter what our school thinks. Most of them are idiots," Alec glanced back at Mr. Dirk, who was still texting away. He then lowered his voice. "I have to ask, though, why wait?"

"I don't know, I mean, it's not like I don't want to. And I can tell she wants to as well, but I feel like we should wait. We became official, what, two weeks ago? Seems a little soon."

Alec chuckled. "Damn, you must be the only guy who is willing to wait. I have to say though, if I were you I wouldn't even bother with morals and shit –Bella's sexy as …"

"If you value your life, you'll shut the fuck up and not finish that sentence."

"Okay, you're touchy. I get it," Alec put his hands up in defense. "But hey, I got your back, bro. And Bella's, too."

Edward grinned. "Thanks, man."

"Before this turns into a total love fest, why don't we just bump fists and keep whatever masculinity we have left."

Edward laughed and bumped fists with Alec. He leaned back in his chair and tried paying attention to the movie, though Alec made it difficult with his sarcastic and inappropriate side comments. After Edward stepped away from his prior reputation, only so many people liked him for who he was while the others pretended to. Edward could tell when someone faked friendship – he had done it himself for so long. In the end, only a couple of his friends had actually been there for him. Among those were Alec, Laurent, and Emmett. He lost a best friend – Rose – and gained a new friend – Alice – and even a girlfriend. He was happy with the way his life was beginning to turn out. The other people could go fuck themselves.

As if his thoughts were accessible to anyone in the room, Angela Webber turned around and gave Edward a flirtatious wink. He couldn't stand Angela – all she ever wanted was to be in his group of friends, no matter how shallow she had to be to get there. She was different from the rest that faked being his friend now, because before those people used to like the way Edward was, now they couldn't understand him. Angela, on the other hand, was as fake now as she was before.

"She's annoying as fuck," Alec murmured.

Edward nodded in agreement.

When the final bell rang, everyone jumped out of their seats and practically ran towards the door, Edward included. He bid Alec goodbye and made his way to his locker. He was surprised to see Bella there, waiting for him. She had gym last period, and was usually still in the locker rooms at this time.

"We had a sub," Bella shrugged, answering the question Edward hadn't asked yet. "He took attendance and told us that we were free to leave, unless we really wanted to exert ourselves."

"Sounds like the most slack sub ever," Edward laughed. He kissed Bella on the cheek before opening his locker. "Was your afternoon as slow as mine?"

"Probably, but only because Rosalie kept on staring at me every chance she got– in the hallways, in class, in the bathroom … It's getting creepy."

"Huh."

"What?"

"Well, I talked to Rose this morning and she seemed really upset. I have no idea what's going on, but she asked about us and then told me to think about forgiving her."

"Are you? You know, going to forgive her?" Bella said, her brows creasing. She leaned against the lockers and bit her lip. "It's your decision, Edward, I can't tell you what to do, but just remember how she manipulated you to get her way. What if she does it again?"

"That's the thing," Edward said, putting away his books. "But you should have seen her, Bella, she was so upset. I've never seen Rose seem so helpless. It makes me wonder what the hell is going on, you know?"

She sighed. "I get why you're curious – she was your best friend. And if she ever decides to be nice to me, I'll give her a chance. I just want to know why she hates me so much."

"I do, too. She won't tell me, though."

"Figures," Bella said. "But I don't want her to mess with us, okay? We've both come such a long way."

"Me, too."

Edward grinned at her and put his arm on top of her shoulders. He closed his locker and slung his backpack over his one shoulder and led the way. The school was close to empty – everyone seemed to want to get the hell out. Edward didn't mind though, because he rarely ever got to be alone with Bella, so it seemed. Or maybe it was because he just wanted to be with her all the fucking time. He didn't want people like Rosalie to fuck up a good thing.

The weather had grown surprisingly warmer – the sun even made a grand appearance. These were the days that he would usually take his motorcycle out for a spin, but he didn't want to waste what time he had with Bella. They were approaching his car, his arm still resting over her shoulders while she leaned into him. Edward stole a quick glance. Bella was really fucking beautiful, with her ivory skin and dark brown hair. Her eyes turned into a lighter brown in the sunlight, flecks of gold shimmering, and Edward inwardly cursed himself for denying her beauty for so long.

He couldn't stand it anymore, he turned her around so her back was pressed against the car and he kissed her – hard. She made a sound of surprise that only turned into a soft moan, and she deepened the kiss. Edward didn't think Bella knew how good of a kisser she was, but hey, he didn't mind. He really fucking loved it, actually. He pressed into her and opened her mouth more, tasting her. Every time he kissed Bella, it was almost like he was waking up for the first time. Like he had been in a deep sleep, and only when their lips touched did he wake up to life's beauty. His hands were in her hair and her hands were at the hem of his shirt when he reluctantly pulled back. Edward was breathless, so was Bella, and he rested his forehead against hers.

"Why'd you stop?" She asked.

"Because we shouldn't have sex in the school parking lot."

"I wouldn't mind."

Edward groaned – she shouldn't be saying stuff like that. "I want to take things slow with you, Bella. I want our first time to be perfect."

"You're more experienced than I am, Edward. I'm sure whenever we do have sex it will be perfect."

"I'm not as experienced as you think, Bella."

She stared at him with curiosity. "You mean … you've never …"

Edward shouldn't lie – he had already lost his virginity. But that didn't count– it never would. Edward only remembered bits and pieces of that night. He wasn't in the right state of mind and it didn't happen with the right girl. He was angry with himself for being so drunk as to lose his virginity and not even remember all of it. Still, he shouldn't lie …

"No, I haven't," He said, and he hated himself for it. There was no way he could take it back now; it would just be a mess. Edward decided to mend what he did and tell her the half-truth. "I want you to be my first, Bella, because I'm pretty sure I'm in love with you." Bella was about to reply, but he cut her off. "You don't have to say anything, I understand. I just wanted to let you know," He smiled down at her. "We've been dating for two weeks, but it feels like so much longer. I've never felt this way before. In fact..."

She seemed stunned – her cheeks had a slight flush and her eyes teary. "What?"

Edward opened the car door for her, even though he knew she hated it. Sometimes he just wanted to be a fucking gentleman. "How about I take you for a ride on my motorcycle?"

"Today?"

Edward shrugged, smiling at her. "There's no time like the present."

Holy shit, Edward just told Bella that he loved her, and not just love, but _in_ love. He had felt his feelings for Bella grow and grow so much that he was sure one day he would just burst. It terrified him because it was true, so true that he couldn't keep it to himself anymore. And honestly, it scared him think about what Bella thought, if she felt the same way. Edward didn't want her to say anything because he didn't want to hear that she didn't reciprocate his feelings. He had faith that one day she would love him, at least he hoped she did, and he was willing to wait.

Edward closed the passenger door once Bella was inside, He caught her looking at him with so much adoration that he wanted Bella to love him so bad. Edward knew he didn't deserve it though. He lied to her about his virginity, and hadn't even told her about his health. Edward had done so many stupid fucking things.

He deserved whatever had it coming for him.

* * *

**Twitter: KarinaCullen**

**Tumblr: addicterbooker and i-nfiniteinspiration**

* * *

**Hey guys, so I know that I said this would be up on the weekend, and it's Tuesday and I'm only updating this now ... but I have a really good reason! Okay, it's not a good reason. Long story short, I had a good night out and then paid the consequences on Saturday. And then on Sunday I had a bunch of errands to run which I couldn't do on Saturday since, like I said, I had consequences from Friday's late night. Sigh. Anyways, here it is haha.**

**I hope you guys liked it - it's kind of different from my the usual EPOV, but important just the same.**

**Okay ... what books did I read since I last updated?**

**1) Shatter Me by Tahereh Mafi**

**2) Unravel Me by Tahereh Mafi (WARNER OMG I LOVE HIM!)**

**3) Overseas by Beatriz Williams**

**4) Rush by Maya Banks (if you need a book after Fifty Shades, this series would be it. I'm reading the second one right now. Yeah ...)**

**And that's all haha. I really didn't read much since I've been so busy with work. But please REVIEW and I'll see you guys soon :)**

**Much Love,**

**Karina**


	32. Chapter Thirty Two: Clash

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a well-deserved hangover. Ugggghhh.

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Chapter Thirty-Two: Clash

_**Bella**_

She was going to die.

Okay, not really, but the speed that Edward was going made her feel like she was racing towards her death.

When Edward asked her if she was up for a ride on his motorcycle, she thought that he would take it slow first. Bella should have known better – there was only one way Edward drove any vehicle and that was _fast_. She held onto him with all her might – her arms encircling his waist and her hands clutching onto his shirt. She was too scared to close her eyes, weirdly enough, so instead she watched as they zipped through the town at a speed that should have been illegal. If Bella looked forward things seemed to come at her slower, however, she held onto Edward so tight that her cheek rested against his back. Everything they passed was a blur.

Bella wasn't scared so much as anxious. She knew she was safe with Edward, that he would never do anything dangerous with her on the backseat of his motorcycle. With the helmet on, her breaths seemed to come out louder, like they were trying to escape. Bella could almost feel Edward's giddiness as they rode. She knew that Edward adored his motorcycle, and that he only ever drove it when the weather was like it was now – sunny and no predictions of rain. He told her that he would sometimes steal a ride in between the sessions of downpour, but that he never dared to ride _in_ it. Edward liked to take risks – but that was a risk he'd rather not dwell on.

Edward revved the engine and she felt the slight pull-back before they surged forward. A small shriek escaped her lips and she felt Edward shake from laughter. He took one hand off the handle and placed it on top of her clasped ones. It was meant to soothe her, to tell her that she was okay. Bella already knew that, but if he didn't put his damn hand back on the handle she was going to freak out. Fortunately, he did, but only just before he made a sharp turn. She swayed with the bike and held onto Edward tighter. He slowed down as they approached a red light.

"Where are we going?" Bella asked a little louder since she had a helmet on.

"I don't know, I'm just winging it. I have to go to work though, so not for too long," Edward replied, his voice muffled. With his helmet on, all she could see were his eyes – his true-green eyes. "Are you doing okay?"

"Yeah, you're just a very fast driver."

Edward laughed. "Well I didn't buy this thing just to cruise around Forks," The light turned green and Edward revved the engine. "I'll bring you back in one piece, Bella. Just hold onto me."

She didn't need to be told twice.

When Edward said he was winging it – he meant that he would be making decisions at the _last possible moment_. Sometimes he would begin to turn right but then decide that he wanted to go left instead. For the most part, Edward just went straight. Bella could tell that he was enjoying himself, and she wasn't going to deny him of this. It wasn't like she had a fear of motorcycles – it's just that she never spend much time around one, and now she was on the back of Edward's bike and going at speeds she didn't want to know about. Phil would have scowled at her, lectured her, hurt her. He wasn't a fan of motorcycles.

She remembered when she was little, when Phil was still sort-of nice to her, and they went to go get ice cream since it was such a nice day. They walked, and on the way there a group of motorcycles passed by so fast that if you blinked, you would have missed them. Phil had grumbled about how dangerous they were and how they were annoyingly loud. He didn't understand the motivation behind its invention, why it was even created in the first place. Phil believed that only certain people rode on motorcycles – middle class. He had enough money to provide cars – nice cars with a quiet engine and the sureness that it would be safe. Phil had told Bella to never get on one, for it would taint the reputation their family had in Forks. It would make her seem rebellious, and that he and Renee didn't know how to raise their child. She never understood why, but she obliged. Especially so once he started hurting her – she didn't want to know what it would have been like if he saw her on one.

It was funny that she was now on the back of a motorcycle, and Phil didn't even know about it. Letting Edward drive her around on his bike was like flipping Phil off with the magic finger. It made her feel defiant, and it also made her feel righteous. She hadn't realized that she had begun to relax until she heard Edward chuckling.

"Getting the hang of it?" He yelled, just before he made another harsh turn.

Instead of screaming she laughed at the flip-flop in her belly. "I guess so."

Just as she started having fun, Edward pulled up into the driveway. Bella sighed when he turned off the engine, and she took off her helmet. She shook her hair out and got off the bike. Edward was watching her with that same expression he had in California. She didn't know what it was until an hour ago – love. _Love_, really? Bella never knew she was capable of being loved, that she deserved it at all. When Edward had told her that he was in love with her, she didn't know what to say. Her heart ached with pleasure and her eyes started to tear. Edward told her that she didn't need to say anything, and she guessed it was because he was scared that she wouldn't say it back, but he was wrong.

Bella had a really good feeling that she was in love with him, too.

She still couldn't believe that Edward was a virgin. After all this time, it turned out that he was just as inexperienced as she was. There were many times when she thought that they were going to have sex, but she was always relieved when Edward pulled away. Bella knew that if she said no, Edward would comply; however, she didn't _want_ to say no. She was ready; it's just that she was nervous about Edward's expectations. Now that she knew the truth, she knew that the next time the opportunity rose, she would feel differently. And the fact that Edward wanted her to be his first made her feel more than special.

"Do you think Charlie would kill me if I picked you up with this?" Edward asked, getting off the bike.

"I don't know, maybe you should ask him how he feels about them when he gets here."

Edward leaned onto his bike. "You know Charlie will be here next week – you have to tell my parents sometime before then."

"I know, _I __know_," Bella sighed. "I just don't know how to approach the topic."

"It seems pretty straightforward to me."

"Don't be a smartass, Edward. I'm serious – I wouldn't even know where to begin."

"Look," He reached for her hand and pulled her towards him. "I think you should tell them tonight, since Charlie will be here in a week, literally seven days from today. I'll be working late but I don't think you should wait for me. You know my parents – they'll understand."

"I don't know …"

"I don't either, but you don't have a choice. I haven't told them because it's not my story to tell, but it feels wrong not telling them that you'll be moving out to live with your biological father who just happens to be from California. Not to mention you met him a couple of weeks ago. They would want to talk to him and make sure he is legit."

"Well it's not like he's some con man," she retorted.

"For all they know Charlie could be a fucking psycho."

Bella hung her head and groaned. "I know you're right. Okay, I'll tell them."

"Good," Edward murmured as he kissed her cheek. It was quick, and he pulled away to look at her. "You know that I'll miss you, right? We'll see each other every day and yet I feel like I won't ever see you at all." He kissed her other cheek. "I mean, who am I going to rehearse my lines with late at night?"

She laughed at this. "There's such a thing as a phone, you know. And you don't need to rehearse all night –you're already so good. The play is going to be fantastic."

"All because you were the one who encouraged me to audition, but I guess the phone is optional. If you would just convert to a damn iPhone then we could face time."

"Edward, you're making it sound like I'm going far away."

"It feels like it." Bella didn't know what else to say, so she kissed him swiftly on the lips. She wanted so much more, but she was afraid that Edward's parents were spying on them through the window. After pulling away, Edward hoisted himself onto his bike and put his helmet on. "I guess I should go to work. When I get back I expect you to have told my parents everything, okay?"

Bella nodded, waving him goodbye as he revved the engine and drove away.

** x**

Bella decided that she didn't want to go home just yet, and told Esme that she would be going to hang out with Alice and would be back soon. She could tell herself that she just wanted to be with her best friend, but if she was going to be completely honest, Bella didn't want to tell Esme and Carlisle about Charlie. She knew she had to do it tonight, since Edward insisted and she would have to tell them eventually, but she figured she needed to build herself up for it. Alice would know what to do – she could help Bella.

She jogged to the driver's seat of her car and got inside. It still boggled her mind that Charlie had gotten her this car for her sixteenth birthday and that Renee had lied about it. She always thought it was strange that Renee had just bought her a brand new, expensive, car for her sixteenth birthday. Bella was never really spoiled. She never questioned Renee though, because she was too grateful to have been given a new car at all. To now know that such a luxury was given to her from Charlie, a man she didn't even know existed until last September, who cared for her even though he didn't know she was being lied to, warmed her. Bella was feeling cared for by so many people all at once that she really didn't know what to do with herself. She sighed at the quiet hum of her engine and then checked her blind spot before driving onto the road.

Bella's phone was buzzing incessantly. She knew that Alice was texting her, telling her to hurry up. They were really a pair – the two most opposite in personalities who surprisingly got along excellently. Alice had brought out good qualities in Bella – like saying yes to more things. If it weren't for Alice, Bella would have been content with staying at home every weekend, but now she looked forward to going to the mall or having a movie night. She even liked going to parties – not for the stereotypical aspects, like the alcohol, but because she got to be with Alice. Alice helped Bella fend off her classmates who only wanted to be friends with her because of Edward. She cared for Edward deeply, but he was just so popular – everyone wanted a piece of him.

She parked across the street from Alice's house and noticed that there was a completed house that was already sold. Bella sometimes wondered why Forks tried to create new communities at all, since not so many people rushed to live there, but she guessed it was because they were trying to expand. Alice lived in one of the new communities, and her family was one of a few residents. It was a stark contrast compared to where Bella lived. Bella knew everyone who lived on her street – had since she was little. The trees that lined the sidewalks in the newer communities were young – small and thin. The trees in Bella's neighborhood were so big that the branches began to make an arch along the road. The newer communities also seemed too empty – too vacant, just waiting for the day that it will be filled with families.

"Damn, bitch, took you long enough!" She heard Alice yell from across the street. She was waving her hands above her head, gesturing for her to get inside. "I've been stuck in torture since school ended for the day. Thank god you wanted to hang out."

Bella ran to the house and bounded the stairs. "What kind of torture?"

"The kind that makes you want to throw up and gauge your eyes out. But you'll see it for yourself."

She thought that Alice was being overdramatic – she always was. Bella stepped through the front door and took off her coat to find Emmett in the living room with Rosalie. They were sitting on the couch; his arms around her and her face snuggled up on his chest. It wasn't that they were being affectionate that was so disturbing, but Alice and Bella couldn't stand Rosalie, and it was reciprocated. Bella didn't understand what Emmett saw in her – or maybe he didn't see anything in her at all, he only saw the outside. It was hard not to notice – Rosalie was beautiful, however, her personality made her the ugliest girl Bella knew.

"Bella!" Emmett boomed, taking his arm off of Rosalie and beaming at her with his bright smile. "I haven't seen you in forever. How was your break?"

She was about to reply when Rose scoffed. "I'm sure she had a great time in California while taking advantage of Edward's generosity."

Bella stepped forward. "What the _hell_ did you just say?" She could feel Alice pulling on her sleeve, silently telling her to walk away, but she shook Alice off.

"Look, Duckling, I know that you and Edward are all lovey-dovey now and whatever, but think about it. Do you really think he likes you for you, or because he feels guilty for treating you like shit. Two different things, honey," Rosalie shrugged, getting up from the couch and crossing her arms. She gave Bella a coy smile. "And besides, it's not like you're a complete waste – Brant still thinks about you. He says hi, by the way."

"How do you know Brant?"

"He's my cousin."

"_No fucking way_," Alice muttered.

"Good looking kid, huh? Guess it's in our genes," Rose laughed.

"Why don't you just leave me alone, Rosalie? I haven't done anything to you."

Rose shook her head, eyes narrowing. "You bitch; you've made my life hell!"

"No, _you_ made your life hell. Everything that has gone down to shit for you is all because of what _you_ have done. Don't blame me for what went wrong. I wasn't the one who lied to Edward, who manipulated him. I wasn't the one who used his charisma for my own advantage. I'm not the scheming bitch who only thinks of herself – that's you, Rosalie," Bella began to back away with Alice, watching as Rosalie's expression changed from shocked to anger. She could tell that Rosalie knew that everything Bella said was true, and she was too stubborn to admit it. For once, Bella had the upper hand. She began to turn away, towards the stairs that would have led to the bedrooms – to Alice's room, but she stopped mid-step. She gave Rosalie one last glance and shook her head. "You can tell Brant that I say hi, as well. I don't mind if we're friends, because I know that he's a good person and would accept that Edward and I are together. At least Brant wouldn't be a bitch about it."

Alice then grabbed Bella by the hand and pulled her upstairs. Alice's house wasn't as grand as Edward and Bella's but she felt like it was enough. There were only three of them – Alice, Emmett, and their mom. They didn't need too much space and they seemed to prefer it. It felt cozier. In no time they were in Alice's room – which she was pretty sure was the master bedroom since it was quite large. The walls were painted a light shade of purple and her furniture was white. Twinkly lights lay on her bedpost and vanity. Alice had explained how she couldn't sleep without a little bit of light, but refused to use a nightlight. She was creative enough to think of other means. Her bed was large and had a floral bedspread with plenty of decorative pillows. Her vanity was covered with jewelry, makeup, and perfume. Alice had a walk-in closet, which she said was still too small. There were pictures of her and her family, and some with Bella, but she only saw one from her life in California. It was of her and Emmett on the beach, and Alice looked about thirteen. Her hair was longer, which was strange since Bella was so accustomed to her pixie cut. She didn't have any photos with her old friends, and Bella knew that it was because thinking about them made her upset.

Bella was familiar with Alice's room. She had been in it a couple of times whenever she picked up Alice for school or they just wanted to hang out. She sat on the edge of the bed and sighed – she was still worked up from her confrontation with Rosalie. How dare that witch tell her that she was nothing but charity to Edward, and that she was soaking it up like a sponge? Rosalie obviously didn't know Edward enough to understand what kind of person he was. She was willing to be nice to Rosalie for in case Edward ever decided to forgive her, but now she wasn't so sure. Bella would do just about anything for Edward, but she had a feeling that trying to get along with Rosalie was close to impossible. If she only knew why that girl hated her so much, maybe everything could be resolved – that's what made this so frustrating.

Alice gave a small applause. "Praise, B. That was good – pretty much made my day, actually."

"Well, I'm glad you enjoyed it, because I don't know what I'm feeling right now."

"Hey, she deserved it, Bella. She's a crazy bitch and has no one to blame but herself. I keep telling my brother to go find someone worthy of his time, but he says that Rosalie is not the person she portrays herself to be. Complete bullshit, if you ask me."

"I don't know, Al. I mean, she and Edward were best friends for a long time, so she must be a different person around others. It's just me she doesn't like."

"Doesn't matter – she's still the devil's spawn," Alice sniffed. "Under all that pretty must be a whole lot of ugly."

Bella couldn't help but laugh – leave it to Alice to completely switch her mood. "By the way, who bought the house across the street? Didn't they just finish building it like a week ago? Someone must have really liked it."

"_Hmm_," Alice leaned her face to the window and peered across the street. "I'm not sure. I think it was just bought a couple of days ago, too. We'll see soon enough." She sighed and launched herself onto the bed. Bella giggled when Alice sighed again, dramatically this time. "All this drama is so exhausting, but I can't deny that it's entertaining."

"I wish I was as excited as you – I've never had this much drama before. I feel overwhelmed."

"That's why you have me, B, to guide you in the dramatic world that is high school," Alice said, flipping onto her back. "So how are you and Edward, by the way? I mean you guys making out in front of me should say it all – "

Bella blushed. "Sorry about that."

"– But I still need to know everything. Are you happy, Bella? Is this what you want?"

"Of course this is what I want," Bella said, her voice confident. She gave Alice a small smile. "He said he loved me today, Al. And I'm pretty sure I love him, too."  
Alice let out of puff of air. "Wow. That's really fast – but not surprising at all. You guys are strangely good together. Freaks me the fuck out," Alice joked, causing Bella to push at her shoulder lightly. "So have you guys …"

She shook her head. "No, not yet. Edward wants to wait."

"And you don't?"

"Well, I was hesitant, because I always thought that Edward was just more experienced than me. But then he told me that he was still a virgin, and that he wanted me to be his first."

"No way!" Alice exclaimed, sitting up now. "I mean, the fact that he wants you to be his first is adorable, but I just can't imagine Edward being a virgin. Never even crossed my mind."

"I know," Bella agreed, and then she groaned. "But now I have to tell Edward's parents that Charlie is coming here and that I agreed to live with him. Edward wants me to tell them tonight, but I'm just nervous."

"Oh, B, you have to tell them. Isn't he arriving next week? You have to give them a heads up."

"I know – and I will. I promised Edward that I would tell them."

"Good, and if you need me, you know that I'll be there in an instant. But, how about we take your mind off that and the devil's spawn and watch a movie?" Alice said, getting out of the bed. She stared at her shelf that was full of DVD's and tapped her finger against her chin. "I was thinking of a comedy – God knows we need a laugh."

Bella got up eagerly to stand beside Alice. They laughed and playfully argued trying to find which movie to watch. She was so grateful for Alice, for making her feel better whenever she needed it. Alice was a gem, and Bella treasured her.

** x**

By the time they finished their movie, Bella realized that it was already nine o'clock and that Edward would be off work soon. She still hadn't told Esme and Carlisle her news, and now she only had about an hour to tell them before Edward got home. She desperately wanted to stay over at Alice's and forget that she had to do anything at all. She wanted to be free from her drama, but knew that she couldn't be until she graduated. She had a year and a half to go, and still had lots to sort through.

Bella shifted on the bed, trying not to wake Alice. She got up carefully and went to her friend's desk and grabbed a pen and paper. Bella wrote a note telling Alice that she had gone home and that she would text her when she got there. Alice always hated it when Bella didn't wake her up, but Bella couldn't bear the thought of waking up someone who looked so at peace. She ripped the paper from its coil and walked back to the bed, leaving the note on Alice's nightstand, right beside her cell. She was tiptoeing out of the room when her phone buzzed. It surprised her and she cursed out loud, still not waking Alice. She picked her phone out of her pocket and glanced at the caller ID, answering it immediately.

"Charlie?" Bella whispered.

"Bells! Did I catch you at a bad time?"

"No, I'm just at my friend's house. I'm leaving now, though – I have school tomorrow."

"Of course, of course," Charlie said. She heard the thud of a car door closing through the line. "So I found a house for us."

"Where?"

"In the newer communities – I was hoping you could give me some insight on the neighborhood since I don't know much."

"Well, to be honest, I don't either. But I can check it out tomorrow and get back to you," Bella replied, quietly going down the stairs. She ran into Emmett, who gave her a look of an apology – most likely for Rosalie's behavior. She shook her head, telling him not to worry about it, in which he patted her shoulder and walked her out. "What's the name of the community?"

Charlie paused. "You seemed to have taken great care of your car."

"What?" She waved at Emmett when he closed the door behind her. She was fishing for her keys, confused about Charlie's statement. When she looked up to unlock her car, she nearly dropped her phone. There standing right beside her car, was Charlie. He laughed when he saw her expression, and she could only guess how dumb she looked. He started to move toward the car that was parked in the driveway of the new house. Bella was so dumbstruck – she didn't know what to say but had so many questions. She wanted to know what he was doing in Forks so soon and then she wondered how she was going to explain all of this to Edward's parents.

Charlie leaned against the back of the black car, which she guessed was his because it looked quite expensive, and gestured towards the house with his arms. He had a broad grin upon his face when she approached him. "How do you like this house?" He asked.

She looked at him, wide-eyed. "I don't understand."

"This is the house I got for us," Charlie laughed, still amused at her reaction. And then he pulled her into a tight hug. "Welcome home, Bells."

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**Twitter: KarinaCullen**

**Tumblr: i-nfiniteinspiration and addicted-booker**

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**Hi guys - sorry for the slight delay in an update. I have a full time job and am trying to cram in friend-time whenever I have the time. This chapter has actually been done for a week and a half, but I had to tweek some things and blah blah blah.**

**In regards to Edward's illness and it seeming to be "drawn out too long" - remember that I do have a reason for it. In due time, which is soon, you'll find out why.**

**I'm thinking there may be five chapters left in this story, but there could be a couple more than that. It's safe to say that within a couple of months, this story will be complete. Crying, but excited haha.**

**The only book I've finished since I last updated is_ Fever by Maya Banks_ (just letting you know that this is erotica and therefore I felt quite uncomfortable reading some of it. The threesome scene ... *shudders*). I'm reading _The 5th Wave by Rick Yancey_ right now - it's excellent. So far.**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**Much love, **

**Karina **


	33. Chapter Thirty Three: Beginning

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a bag of dark chocolate covered blueberries (which I just so happen to be eating right now. YUM)

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Chapter Thirty-Three: Beginning

**_Bella_**

Bella was so shocked that Charlie was here, actually here, in Forks. She didn't expect him for another week, and now he was standing on the driveway of their new home. She was still in his embrace, and she noticed that he didn't have a jacket on. It may have been reasonable to be wearing a button-down in January in California, but in Forks? That was hypothermia in the making – she could already smell the rain lingering in the air, waiting for the right moment to fall. Bella wondered if Charlie even owned a raincoat, and if he didn't then their first shopping trip would be to get one as quickly as possible – he couldn't survive in Forks without a raincoat.

"Are you cold?" Bella asked.

"No."

He was lying – she could feel him gently shivering. She ignored it, figuring he wanted to seem like the dampness in the air didn't chill him. "I'm really glad you're, Charlie," she murmured, pulling back so she could look at his tired face. "But I do have to ask – why are you here so early?"

Charlie pulled away, putting his hands on her shoulders. He smiled so broadly. "I was able to get what needed to be done at work out of the way, and be here in a week in advance. This was all supposed to be a surprise – I was going to show up at your boyfriend's house and all that."

"Well, I'm surprised _now_."

"In a good way, I hope?"

"Of course in a good way! It's just that I haven't exactly told Edward's parents about you, and I was going to tell them tonight …"

"Oh, I know all about that, Bells."

Bella blinked. "You do?"

"Well, not about you telling them tonight, just that you hadn't told them. Once you said you were staying at your neighbor's house, which also happens to be where your boyfriend lives, I decided to do a background check …"

"You did a _background check_?"

"You don't have to say it like it's a bad thing," Charlie laughed. "Anyway, once I found that they were possibly the epitome of outstanding citizens, I decided to give them a call and offer my gratitude. Imagine their surprise, and mine, when they only heard about for the first time. Of course, I promised I wasn't a scam and sent them all of my information and my own background check."

"What did Carlisle and Esme say?"

"Well, they were surprisingly understanding about it, but then they asked to Skype them just to be sure, and from there we started planning. They made me promise that they would get to check up on you at least once a week to make sure you were okay, but that they were thrilled that you finally had a parent who cared," Charlie frowned. "I still feel guilty, Bells. I should have fought harder."

"It's okay, Charlie. You didn't know."

"But that's the problem, isn't it? I should have fought so hard that my heart could have given out. I should have stood up to that bastard of a judge and told him that you were my only priority. I should have tried to reason with Renee and not let the both of you slip through my fingers. I should have done so many things, Bells, and I didn't. Because of what I didn't do, you suffered, and that will always be my greatest regret."

Bella was stunned – she had been with Charlie for all of fifteen minutes and she was already at a loss for words. She didn't know where to begin. The fact that Charlie, Carlisle, and Esme had been plotting behind her back – for wholehearted reasons – surprised her. It didn't occur to her until now that the house Charlie got for them was right across the street from Alice's. Bella was both excited and nervous about that. She adored the idea of being only thirty seconds away from her best friend, but despised the idea of seeing Rosalie whenever she came over to see Emmett. She was proud of herself for finally standing up to Rosalie, and yet she hoped it would never happen again. Bella would like to stay away from her as much as humanly possible.

In all of her excitement, and anxiety, Bella had forgotten that it was a school night and that if she didn't get to bed soon, she would hate herself in the morning. She told Charlie just that, and he chuckled. Bella figured it was more at himself than at her – like he had forgotten that his seventeen-year-old daughter was still a junior in high school. In a way she sometimes she felt like she wasn't either – like she was much older than her classmates. Bella had been through things that no one should ever have to endure, and that made her grow up too fast, too soon. But she was still only seventeen, and even though she knew hardship, she was still young in many ways.

Charlie agreed that it was time for her to go get some rest, but that he wanted to stop by the Cullen's first. He said that he would follow her in his car, and Bella blushed at the idea of him seeing her drive. She was a good driver, but the idea that Charlie should have been the one to teach her how to drive, and not Phil, was daunting. Not to mention that her car was secretly given to her from Charlie – Bella didn't want him to think that she wasn't taking care of it. That's why when they left the house Bella drove carefully, Charlie right behind her. She drove the speed limit and came to gentle stops. If Bella drove like she usually did, she would have gotten to the Cullen's in eight minutes. As it was, she got back in fifteen with her careful driving. Not that it was too much of a difference; Bella was just making a point.

The front door opened excitedly before Bella even put her car in park. Bella hadn't registered that Edward's motorcycle was in the driveway until she saw him come out with his parents. While Carlisle and Esme were grinning, Edward was more hesitant – wary. She swung open the car door expectantly and saw That Charlie was already making his way to Edward's parents. They were shaking hands and chatting eagerly by the time Edward approached her.

"Did you know this was going to happen?" Bella asked Edward.

He shook his head. "Not a clue. When I got home, my parents filled me in with their news and then you arrived. Now here we are."

"Well, shit."

"Literally took the words right out of my mouth."

Carlisle extended his hand towards the front door and invited Charlie inside, followed by Esme, and then Edward and Bella. It was strange to see Charlie getting along with Edward's parents so well. Bella had never thought that having a boyfriend, or even a guy liking her, was possible, but if it did she believed it would have been terrible for the counterparty's parents to meet hers. While the Cullen's had already known Phil and Renee, Bella thanked God that it was Charlie that they were meeting – that this was the parent of their son's girlfriend. When they got to the living room, Bella sat beside Edward, with Carlisle and Esme across from them and Charlie settled in the single couch.

Edward and Bella stayed quiet as the parents discussed where to go from here, onward. The most important topic, it seemed, was when Bella would move out. The thought excited her, yet it also created a sudden weight that pushed down on her chest. It was silly to think that she would never see Edward again, as they had said that they would still each other at school and any moment they could steal. It was knowing that she wouldn't run into him first thing in the morning, her hair a mess and his eyes tired. They would have to call each other just to say 'good night', instead of whispering it into each other's ears every night. The fact that she wouldn't see him as much as she had grown used to, saddened her. However, she would be living with Charlie, who she trusted wholeheartedly and looked forward to learning more about. Alice was across the street from her, which was convenient if they ever needed some girl-time. It was also convenient if Rosalie happened to be over at Alice's, since then Bella and Alice could hang out at her new home and avoid another confrontation. There were pros and there were cons – she just had to get over her pessimism and look forward to the better future.

Bella watched as Charlie, Carlisle, and Esme laughed at how surprised both she and Edward were about the situation. Something along the lines of not doing such a good job of pulling one on them, all in which was said politely. Bella was still surprised with how cool Carlisle and Esme were about everything, and that they were allowing her to move in with Charlie. She guessed a background check on both sides seemed legitimate, and being promised to visit Bella at least once a week appeased them. If anything ever went wrong, Edward's parents wouldn't be too far away. Nothing would go wrong, of course, she had faith in Charlie.

They were discussing Phil and Renee now. Bella still did not speak but Edward seemed to feel that it was paramount to be involved in this topic.

"Did Detective Newton say anything about the whereabouts of Renee and Phil?" Edward asked.

"Unfortunately, no," Charlie sighed. "All he knows is that he isn't back in the US. He suspects they're still in Canada, but they could have gone anywhere by now."

"Well, _fuck_."

"Edward, watch your mouth," Carlisle chastised.

Bella already knew that Detective Newton was on top of the case, and Charlie agreed that they were in the right hands, but still felt as though they should be cautious if Phil and Renee ever decided to return.

"We could probably start moving Bells' stuff tomorrow," Charlie said, returning to the topic of her moving out.

"I have school tomorrow, though," Bella finally said. She didn't mind missing school; she just felt that she needed to point it out.

"Of course," Charlie nodded. "I was thinking after school, and then just continue until you're fully settled. Depending on how much stuff you have, and with school, we probably won't have everything until the weekend."

Bella mouthed, "Oh."

"We'll also need to go into your old house and get the rest of your things. Only if you're comfortable with that," Esme pointed out, referring to both Bella and Charlie.

Charlie nodded nonchalantly, as if getting all of Bella's things, no matter the place, was important. Bella made a slight nod. She still had shivers when she thought of that house. Hell, she never even looked at it when they passed by it. However, there were many things that Bella wanted to retrieve – she would just have to be brave. "It's no problem for me, Esme."

That was the half-truth – it wasn't a problem, but it also would be a challenge.

"I have your room set up –okay, not really. I got you a bed and a dresser, but we could always go on the weekend and pick out what you want. It will suffice for now, just until you get settled in," mentioned Charlie.

"Oh," she replied, out loud this time. "That sounds great, Charlie."

It did sound great – she got a room that she was able to decorate herself for the first time, and Charlie didn't pressure her when it came to having all of her things moved in. Carlisle and Esme were discussing the most efficient way to have her things moved, and whether they should have dinner together tomorrow night. Charlie agreed that dinner sounded excellent, and then everyone stood up.

Carlisle shook hands with Charlie. "It was great finally meeting you, Charlie."

"You, as well," Charlie agreed. "I can't thank your family enough for all that you have done. Name a nice place for tomorrow evening. Something fancy – I'll make reservations."

"We don't need anything over the top."

"Of course you don't, but it's my treat – don't argue with me, Carlisle. It's the least I can do after everything."

After a few pleasantries, Bella yawned – the events of the day had worn her out. She hugged Charlie goodbye and told him she couldn't wait for tomorrow, and then went upstairs with Edward. The adults stood in the foyer a little longer. Once they were out of their parents' sight Edward grabbed her hand and kissed her temple. She sighed in contentment – Bella really needed his reassurance that everything would be okay. She knew it would be, but Edward always confirmed it.

"I guess this is the last night I get to say good night to you in person, at least for a while," Edward sighed. "Saying it on the phone won't be the same. I'll hear how tired you are, but I won't see the dreamy look in your eyes in preparation for sleep. Even when you're tired, Bella, you're beautiful."

Bella melted inside. "You're beautiful, too, Edward."

"Not the most masculine thing a guy wants to hear."

"You are, though," Bella laughed. "You're very handsome, Edward, and I know you know that. But do you know that you're beautiful? That after everything I have gone through, all the ugly things I have seen and felt, you have shown me that beauty and hope still exists? I owe my life to you."

Edward stayed silent for a moment too long, and at first Bella thought that she had said too much. That she may have scared him. And then he pulled her closer, her head resting against his hard chest and his hands tangling in her hair. Slowly, Bella wrapped her arms around him and breathed him in. It wasn't a kiss and it wasn't spoken in words, and it was enough to know that no matter what, Bella would always be safe in Edward's arms. He was home, and even though this would be there last night together, it was also affirmation that she would never be alone. Bella had a boyfriend, a best friend, a family who treated her like their own, and a parent who loved her.

For the first time, Bella felt normal.

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**Twitter: KarinaCullen**

**Tumblr: addictedbooker and/or i-nfiniteinspiration**

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**Hi, friends! I hope you are all doing well :)**

**Short chapter - actually, this is the shortest chapter I have ever written for this story. Only because if I extended this any more then it would have been dragging and _blah_. It also may or may not have anything to do with the important events happening in the very near future. Just saying. Trust me when I say that you'll thank me for making the happy-ish chapter because from now on ... HI. PLEASE DON'T HURT ME. **

**With that warning out of the way, these are the books I read since the last chapter:**

**1. The 5th Wave by Rick Yancey (FANTASTIC!)**

**2. The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer (also great, and then when I read the ending I wanted to die because the next book was sold out everywhere in my city. I had to order it online and it came in the mail yesterday. I have a feeling shit is about to go down, and that makes me both excited and scared to read the next book). **

**I hope you are all having a great summer! If you're still in school - hang on there. You can do it!**

**Much love,**

**Karina**


	34. Chapter Thirty Four: Unrequited

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a new iPad (which has made me broke. Sigh).

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Chapter Thirty-Four: Unrequited

_**Edward**_

It had been two weeks sing Bella had moved in with Charlie. Two. _Fucking_. Weeks.

At first Edward thought he could get used to living in his house without Bella in it, and for a while it worked. And by "a while", he meant two hours. He soon found himself bored to tears, his hands itching to feel for Bella, and his ears missing the sound of her sweet, sweet voice. Bella had laughed when he called her and told her just that, and then they talked on the phone for hours. They called each other every day and texted each other in constantly – Alec had said that Edward was whipped, in which Edward returned his statement by flipping him off.

It wasn't like Edward could help himself – he had never had a girlfriend before. He was used to stringing girls along and never talking to them after a couple of days. Edward didn't want to continue seeing them after a while. With Bella he felt that he didn't get to see her enough, which was true. Especially now that she lived ten minutes away – okay, ten minutes wasn't that bad. In fact, on his bike he could probably get there in less time. He remembered when he showed up to her house a week ago on his bike; Bella thought it was too soon to tell Charlie that he rode a motorcycle. They were both shocked when Charlie came out of his house with a smile on his face.

"That's a sweet bike, Edward," Charlie had said.

Charlie was fucking awesome.

It had taken longer to retrieve all of Bella's things than they thought it would take – even Bella didn't think she owned that much. It was hard for her to walk in and out of her old house, to pass each area that she had been hurt. Edward had watched the expressions that etched her face. From pain to fear, and then acceptance – acceptance that what was done was done. Edward hated that Bella had acknowledged that she was defenseless under Phil's cruel hands. It was fucked up, and the longer Edward spent inside that house, the more on edge he became. It came to a point where Charlie had asked if he wanted to take a walk with him to cool off, that Edward began to relax.

Edward liked Charlie, and the more he got to know Bella's father, the more comfortable he felt with having his girlfriend under his care. It was a weird transition, not being the one to provide shelter for Bella, but he was grateful that at least one of Bella's parents decided to stand the fuck up. Because Charlie and Bella were still getting to know each other, he was a little more lenient with rules. Things like curfew (nine o'clock on weekdays, midnight on weekends), and keeping her bedroom door wide open whenever Edward was in the room with her took place, but Charlie understood that Bella had a lot of freedom when she lived with the Cullen's and that she would never take advantage now that she moved out.

Another thing that he liked about Charlie was how much he trusted Edward with Bella. He was sure that Bella had told him how awful he was to her before, and the memories still made him want to kick his own ass, but Charlie understood that Edward had changed and would do anything for his daughter. God, he sounded like a fucking cheese ball.

Edward had driven the both of them to school today – they switched every other day. He wouldn't have minded picking her up every day, but Bella argued that her car needed to be driven every once and a while. They only had one class together and that was creative writing. They had finished their assignment a week ago, even before Bella's nine o'clock curfew. Ms. Anderson was surprised with the theme they had come up with, and was more shocked with the turn of events that was his and Bella's relationship, since Edward was pretty sure she put them together since they seemed so _in_compatible in September.

Edward rounded the corner that led to Bella and Alice's street. Today they had driven Alice as well since her car was getting an oil change, and she didn't want to ride with Emmett since he was picking up Rose. Alice seemed to hate Rose, even more than Bella, and while he was still pissed off at Rose for what she had done, he couldn't help but feel slightly guilty for hearing all the shit that was being said about her. Edward had to remind himself that Rose had done everyone wrong, and that she deserved what she got. When Bella told him what she said to Rose the day Charlie arrived, he was shocked, and maybe even a little proud. Bella had fire, and she seemed to show it more and more as she grew into herself.

"Hey, Cullen," Alice said as she parked in front of Bella's house. "Are you excited about your play on Friday? B says that your kicking ass in rehearsal."

"She says I'm kicking ass, huh?" Edward grinned at Bella, who pushed him playfully in the arm. Laughing, Edward shrugged. "I'm pretty stoked – I just don't want to psych myself out. I never thought I would get so into theatre, but I really enjoy it. Are you going to come to opening night?"

"Depends – do you want me there on opening night?"

"Alice, I feel like we've reached a point in our relationship where we can call each other friends. Yes, I would like you there."

"God, stop being such a sap. I'll come."

"Always the sassy bitch, hey, Alice?"

"If you expect anything less then you're fucking stupid."

"You guys are ridiculous," Bella shook her head, trying not to smile. "But we should probably go work on that French assignment, Al."

Alice opened the car door and began to get out. "Ugh, yuck. Let's get it over with," She slapped the back of Edward's headrest lightly. "Thanks for the ride, Cullen."

Edward waved in acknowledgement and Alice got out. Bella rolled down her window when Alice walked around the car and threw her keys for Alice to catch. When she secured her the keys in her palm Bella yelled, "Go on ahead. I won't be too long."

Alice quirked a brow, then gave a mischievous smirk before turning around heading inside Bella's house. Edward then pulled Bella's chin toward him and kissed her chastely. He was itching to do that all day, but couldn't because of Alice. After the first day back to school and their PDA, Bella told Edward that they should keep their affections subtler in public. Edward fucking hated it, but he would do anything for Bella. Now that Alice was out of sight, he didn't give a shit – he just wanted to kiss his girl.

Bella moaned into his mouth and just as he was about to deepen the kiss, she pulled away. She opened her mouth to say something, but he went in for another. She laughed and pulled away again, but Edward only kissed her again. They were both laughing when Bella put her hands on his chest and pushed him away.

"Edward, will you calm your hormones for five minutes so I can say something?"

"Nope," He said, leaning in again.

She pushed at his chest. "Edward, seriously. I want to tell you something."

Edward sighed. "Good or bad?"

"Depends on what you think."

Bella seemed nervous; she was biting her lip and looking everywhere but at him. With his thumb, Edward pulled her bottom lip from her teeth and pressed his lips against her cheek, feeling her relax. "Bella, you know you can tell me anything," He whispered into her ear.

For a long time, nothing was said. The only sounds that filled the car were their breathing. Edward watched the rise and fall of Bella's chest as he waited patiently for her to speak. He would not push her, no matter how curious he was to know what the hell was going on. She blew out one huge breath, and just when he thought she was still taking her time, Bella opened her mouth to speak.

"I'm ready," She blurted. Edward stared at her, not knowing if she was serious or not. Bella seemed to think that he didn't understand what she was talking about, but oh, he definitely knew that the fuck was going on "Edward, did you hear me? I said that I'm ready to, you know, have sex with you."

"I …" Edward was at a loss for words.

"I love you, Edward, but if you aren't ready then I'll keep waiting ..."

Like hell she was going to wait – Edward ha been waiting for the perfect time to tell her he was ready but that he would wait for her to get there before anything, but damn. Hunger filled within him and he grabbed Bella's face and kissed her fiercely. She playfully bit on his bottom lip and he groaned, opening her mouth more with his tongue. Edward could feel her smiling, and he took it as an opportunity to grip her hip, where her shirt had ridden up just a little. Her smooth skin sent shivers up his spine.

"I didn't mean that we should do it _now_," Bella chuckled.

Edward groaned, pulling away. "I know. But God, Bella, are you sure you're sure? I don't want to be that asshole boyfriend who makes you feel pressured or anything."

"You're not an asshole boyfriend, Edward, and I _know_ I'm ready," She brought her hands to either side of his face and looked him straight in the eye. "I love you, Edward. I want to be with you in every way possible."

"You're such a fucking sap," he teased. She rolled her eyes, only making him laugh. "So how about this Friday, after the play?"

"Only if you do a good job."

"Is that a challenge?" Bella shrugged, only making Edward chuckle and then lean over to kiss her again. "Why do you have to be such a bitch?"

Bella punched him in the arm before kissing him back. "Why do you have to be such an asshole?"

Edward shook his head and laughed. He couldn't be any happier than he was right now, which made him think that he was even more of a fucking sap than Bella. He was surprisingly okay with that. Friday couldn't come sooner.

** x**

The next day, Edward had driven to school alone, but only because Bella had a doctor's appointment right after school and he had rehearsal. It felt strange to not walk in with her, their hands clasped together, and instead meet her at her locker, but there really wasn't anything Edward could do about it. Bella's appointment was with his dad, just to touch base with how she was recovering from all the injuries she received in September. If anything, this appointment was more for Charlie' sake – he wanted to make sure that Bella didn't have any withstanding injuries. Everyone knew that she didn't, that his dad fixed Bella up months ago, but Charlie needed to be appeased. Edward couldn't blame him, really.

Bella was in a hurry. She was grabbing her things from her locker and muttered repeatedly, "I'm going to be late. I'm going to be late. I'm going to be late."

"My dad won't care if you're late, Bella," Edward said, leaning against the lockers. He glanced at his phone to check the time. "You have half an hour until your appointment."

"But what if something happens in that half hour that makes me late?"

"You don't have to be nervous."

"I'm not."

"_Bella_."

She sighed. "Fine, I'm kind of nervous, but only because I don't want to go there and then suddenly find out that an injury I got a couple months ago has permanent damage. It sounds stupid, because if anything like that were to happen then we would have known about it by now. But still, I can't shake off the feeling."

Edward took a step closer to Bella. "You know nothing like that is going to happen, right?"

"I know," Bella relented. "I just wish you came with me."

"I can, if you want."

"No, you can't. You have rehearsal, Edward. The play is on Friday."

"The play isn't what I'm really excited for," Edward smirked, causing Bella to roll her eyes. "Seriously though, say the word and I'll tell Ms. McGrath that I have an emergency and can't make it today."

Bella seemed to consider this, but then shook her head. She pulled out her math textbook, but then decided against it and put it back in her locker. "As much as I would like you there, you can't. The play is in a couple of days and everyone is counting on you. I'll call you tonight and tell you how everything goes, how does that sound?"

"I have a better idea," Edward said, taking another step closer to Bella. He was near enough now to kiss her forehead, but he held back. "What if I just drop by your house after rehearsal? How does _that_ sound?" She nodded in agreement, in which Edward then leaned in to kiss her forehead. "Don't be nervous, okay? I love you."

"I love you, too."

And with that, she closed her locker door and kissed him chastely on the mouth. As Bella walked away, Edward could see how stiff her spine was, how she wiggled her fingers and took too many deep breaths. He wished he could escape his rehearsal, but he knew that Bella was right. Edward may have only been playing the best friend of the lead role, but his character was important enough that he couldn't miss one practice this week. Regretfully, Edward took two steps backward and once Bella was out of sight, he spun around on his heel and strode away.

The school was pretty much close to empty. All that remained were the teachers and the fair few students in clubs. Forks High didn't have many clubs, four at the most, so the school was near vacant. Every noise echoed down the hallway, the squeak of his sneakers, bits of laughter jumping off the walls. It was only when he heard his hunger emanate from his stomach to the last couple lockers did Edward realize how hungry he was. In fact, he was fucking starving. Glancing at his cell phone to check the time, Edward saw that he had fifteen minutes until rehearsal – more than enough time to go to a vending machine and get something to sedate his hunger.

He also noticed that he had two missed calls from Rose. She had stopped texting him when he didn't reply and was now calling him incessantly. When Edward told Bella about this, she sighed. There was really nothing she could do about Rose calling him, but just repeated that if he wanted to answer the call, she wouldn't be mad. That was the thing about Bella – she was so kindhearted. After all the shit that Edward put her through, she forgave him. Hell, she fell in love with him – not that he was complaining. And now, even after what Rosalie said to her in Alice's house, accusing Bella of using Edward, she wouldn't mind if he forgave Rose if it made him happy. God, he both loved and hated that about her.

Edward didn't even bother listening to Rose's voicemails, and deleted them. "Fuck that," he muttered under his breath.

The sight of the vending machine made Edward a little too happy. He quickly calmed himself as he fished for his wallet in his back pocket. The good thing about the vending machines in Forks High was that they weren't touched by that health crap that so many schools signed up for. There were still chips and candy, all well over the required calorie and sugar limit. Edward shrugged and pressed the button for the big ass cookie. Yeah, Edward really fucking loved those cookies. He also needed the sugar to sustain himself for rehearsal.

Edward could feel his fatigue slowly creeping on him, affirming that he really needed that cookie and all its sugar.

"A big cookie, again? Don't you ever get tired of those damn things?"

Edward didn't have to turn around to know who approached him. He exhaled. "Decided to just stop calling and go straight to face-to-face? Clever, Rose. Though not clever enough because I _still_ don't want to talk to you."

"You're never going to want to talk to me, Edward, but at least now you don't have the option of deleting what I have to say."

Of course she knew that he deleted her texts and voicemails. Edward turned around, and before him stood Rose; she was still beautiful. Edward always knew this, but it didn't stir anything within him. Rose was just a friend, and right now, he could see how much she was hurting. It pained him to see her like this, but he couldn't forget that she deserved it.

"Well?" Edward said. "Let's hear it."

Rose blinked, almost like she couldn't believe that Edward was allowing her to speak. She then let out a shaky breath and pulled her long blond hair over her shoulder. Rose looked tired – wearing ripped jeans and a plaid shirt under her leather jacket. She still looked badass, but anyone who knew her as well as Edward did knew that she didn't even try this morning. Again she exhaled nervously. "You love her," Rose finally said, though it was so quiet that it was almost a whisper. "Bella, I mean. You love Bella."

"I do. But what does that have to do with you?"

"God, Edward. It has _everything _to do with me," she ran a hand through her hair and looked up at the ceiling. "I just … Fuck, after all this time I thought that … I thought that …"

"You thought _what_, Rose? What did you think?"

"I thought that you would love me!" Rose yelled. She had tears in her eyes now and her hands hung, defeated, at her side. "Can't you see, Edward? I've been in love with you for _years_, just waiting for the moment when you realize that you might love me, too."

Edward stared at her, frozen in his place. Never in his life did it ever occur to him that Rose had feelings for him deeper than friendship. "How long have you felt this way?"

"Since seventh grade."

Edward took a sharp breath. "I don't understand why this has anything to do with Bella."

"You really don't remember, do you?" When Edward shook his head, Rose wiped the tears angrily from her cheeks. "In eighth grade, when I decided I was going to tell you how I felt, I made sure I looked extra pretty that day. Sundress, curled hair, everything. You noticed and mentioned that I looked nice, and I took that as my cue to spill everything, but then you said something that shattered my heart," Rose took a deep breath, her eyes scanning the ceiling before landing on him. Her voice broke as she muttered the last sentence. "You said, 'all these girls look so fake these days with their makeup and dyed hair. Look at Isabella – she's so naturally beautiful. That's the kind of girl I want to be with.' After that, you would always stare at her, and talk about her. You didn't even know her that well, just that she was pretty."

"I don't remember saying that," Edward muttered, his eyebrows knit together. "I don't remember any of that."

"Of course you don't, I made sure to come up with a story that made me look like the victim so that you would hate Bella. I know you, Edward. You feel passionately. I figured that if I didn't do anything about Bella, you would fall for her and then forget all about me. You would never love me," Rose sniffed, wiping another tear. "That's when I said that she stole Tyler from me, and that she was smug about it. I made up some sob story just to make sure I had you."

Edward was shaking – more with anger than shock. He walked straight toward Rose, and for a moment, she looked scared. He was close enough to hear her breathing.

"Did it ever occur to you to you to just tell me the fucking truth? Why did you have to come up with some crazy plan to keep me from Bella? No matter if I liked her, Rose, _you_ were my best friend. I would have stood by you."

"I was thirteen, Edward. I didn't really think it through. But, God, if I could take it back I would. I didn't mean for things to get so out of hand, but when you started picking on Bella I just went along with it. I'm so in love with you, Edward – I would have done everything. And that night, that night when we made love …"

Edward shut his eyes. He worked so hard to forget that night even happened, but it was hard to push away something you didn't even remember in the first place. He just knew it happened, and whom it happened with. Regret filled him whenever he thought of who his first time was with, and tried desperately to forget about the blonde hair and blue eyes that were in the snippets he did recall.

His first time was with Rose, and even though it was done drunkenly, he wished it never happened in the first place.

"_Made love_?" Edward whispered incredulously. He shook his head. "We did _not_ make love. Hell, I don't even remember that fucking night."

"But I do!" Rose cried. "It was the best night of my life, and it gave me hope that maybe you did feel the same way."

"Rose, stop."

"The only reason I'm with Emmett, was to make you jealous! That didn't even work. And now you love _Bella_? You fell in love with the fucking duck?"

"Rose, _please_…"

"So here I am now, laying it all out for you, just hoping that you feel the same way, too," Rose said. Her eyes were wide and expectant. "Please, Edward. Please tell me that some part of you loves me, too, and that that night was just as beautiful to you as it was to me."

"That night was a mistake, Rose." Edward seethed.

"No! Don't say that, _please,_" She cried. She crossed her arms and clutched her side. "Don't do this. Don't break my heart."

Seeing Rose so vulnerable was heartbreaking. Never in his life had Edward seen her so open, so exposed. She was always closed off, and then again, he used to be as well. He shook his head at the thought, breathing through his mouth and trying to calm down.

"You lied to me, Rose. You were the one person I was supposed to trust with everything, and you betrayed me. You say you love me, and yet you used me to make sure that I would stop someone from getting in your way. You're using Emmett, just to make me fall in love with you. That isn't love, Rose – it's not even close," Edward said, backing away. He could see Rose's eyes drop, and he knew it was from shame. "I don't love you, Rose, I'm sorry."

Sobs escaped from Rose's mouth as he turned away. It echoed through the halls and slapped Edward in the face. Even if Rose did love him, she had a really shitty way of showing it. He looked over his shoulder to see Rose still standing there, her hands at her side and her head hung low.

"Does Daisy Du - I mean, does _Bella_ know that your first time was with me?"

He stopped in his tracks. "Don't call me anymore, Rose" Edward said more gently this time, not answering her question. "I think it's best if we stopped talking."

The only reply he got was the rush of a pair of shoes squeaking against the floor, followed by the slam of the door. Edward looked back once more and saw that Rose had not moved. She was still standing in the middle of the hallway. He shrugged, not giving much thought to whomever just left except for the fact that he or she was in some sort of hurry.

_It doesn't count_, Edward kept telling himself, _That night doesn't count. You're still a virgin in all the ways that matter. Bella will be your first._

Edward caught sight of the trashcan just outside the auditorium and threw his cookie away. He was no longer hungry. The thought of even putting something in his mouth made him cringe. Edward knew he would get hungry later, and he most definitely needed the sugar, but he couldn't consume anything after hearing the shit he just heard. He pushed through the doors of the auditorium and tried to prepare himself for rehearsal. All he wanted to do was get in his car and go to Bella – he wanted to forget that it was Rosalie he lost his virginity to and that she supposedly loved him. Most of all, Edward wanted to erase the look on Rose's face when he told her he didn't love her back.

* * *

**Twitter:** KarinaCullen

**Tumblr:** i-nfiniteinspiration and/or addictedbooker

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**Hello my lovelies! I hope you all are enjoying your summer vacation and getting a wonderful tan. **

**I hope you liked this chapter - some questions were answered ;) The rest will be in the upcoming chapters. I'm estimating there's about 3 chapters left.**

**Here's the books I read since the last time I updated:**

**1. _The Evolution of Mara Dyer_ by Michelle Hodkin (THAT ENDING. WHAT. WHAT. _WHAT._)**

**2._ Down London Road_ by Samantha Young (if you enjoyed the first book, On Dublin Street, you'll love this too).**

**3. _Beautiful Bastard_ and _Beautiful Stranger_ by Christina Lauren.**

**4. _Amy and Roger's Epic Detour_ by Morgan Matson**

**5. _Angelfall_ by Susan Ee**

**6. _The Secret of Ella and Micha_ by Jessica Sorenson**

**7) _Fallen Too Far_, _Never too Far_, and _Forever Too Far_ by Abbi Glines**

**8) _Taking Chances_ by Molly McAdams**

**if you have any recommendations feel free to let me know!**

**PLEASE REVIEW, and i'll see you guys soon.**

**Much love,**

**Karina. **


	35. Chapter Thirty Five: Emptiness

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a new desk (which was a pain in the ass to assemble)!

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Chapter Thirty-Five: Emptiness

**_Bella_**

It was like the air had been taken out of her lungs. Stolen, crushed, and then gone forever. Bella couldn't find the will to breathe, or to even blink. She was frozen, paralyzed. She was numb.

"I'm so sorry, Bella," Alice said, her voice and expression sympathetic. "I'm so sorry that you had to find out this way, but the minute I heard I came here as fast as I could."

Bella shook her head. "Don't be sorry, Alice. You did the right thing. Edward shouldn't have lied to me."

They were sitting on the sofa in Bella's new house. The living room was large and still needed some furnishing. It was practically empty, kind of like how Bella was feeling at the moment. She didn't expect to come home from her doctor's appointment with Alice sitting on her front steps. She was going to visit Alice anyway to retrieve her math textbook. Bella had considered taking it with her at school, but had placed it back in her locker. It wasn't until Bella was halfway through her examination when she realized that she had a quiz tomorrow. She shot Alice a quick text afterward to ask if she could pick it up since she was still in school due to her detention. Alice really hated French and constantly fought with Mr. Cormier, who still couldn't fathom that Alice spoke French fluently.

Bella remembered the somber look on Alice's face as she approached her with the words that created the first crack in her heart.

"B, I'm sorry," Alice had apologized for must have been the fifteenth time. "But there's something you need to know about Edward."

At first, Bella couldn't believe what Alice was telling her. She was angry that such words were coming out of her mouth, but then she realized that it wasn't Alice she should be angry with. And then once that settled in, Bella was filled with dread. Not once did Bella's mind stray from what Alice was saying, how after her awful and unnecessary detention with Mr. Cormier she quickly went to Bella's locker and grabbed her math textbook. How she heard Edward's voice and went to go greet him really quickly before taking off, but then she heard Rosalie and became intrigued. Bella knew that Rosalie had some deep feelings for Edward, but she never though it would because she was in love with him. Hearing that, Bella didn't care. She understood what Rose saw in Edward, since she was in love with him too. But Bella knew that Edward loved _her_, not Rosalie.

And then what Alice said next didn't only create another fracture, it shattered her heart, her soul, and everything good within her.

"They've had sex, Bella. Edward lied," Alice told her. Her eyes were wide and expectant, gaging Bella's reaction. "I know you love him and he loves you, and I know that you were saving yourself for him, but I just wanted you to know. It's not as bad as it seems; he said he didn't remember it …"

"That's not the point, Al," Bella muttered. "The fact that he doesn't remember what happened isn't the point at all."

Alice sighed. No matter what she said to appease Bella and make her feel better, they both knew the immensity of Edward's lie. Bella was fighting tears, she was blinking them away. Alice then hugged Bella tight, and she wrapped her arms around her best friend. Bella buried her face into Alice's shoulder and sobbed. Just when she thought she had everything worked out, that she had finally unraveled the last lie that haunted her, reality yanked her by the hair and showed her what was what. And it presented to her that the one person she had grown to trust and love wasn't worthy of either. Once again, Bella felt lost.

"Shh," Alice soothed, rubbing small circles onto Bella's back.

Another sob ripped through her. "I just don't know what to do. Where do I go from here?"

"I'm not sure, B. Only you know to the answer to that."

"That's a really shitty way of telling me to follow my heart, Al."

Alice chuckled and squeezed tighter. "I love you, Bella. You're the best, best friend I've ever had."

"You, too," Bella said, pulling away from Alice and wiping her face. "I wouldn't have gotten through everything this year if it wasn't for you."

_And Edward,_ Bella almost said, _If it wasn't for you and Edward._

Just thinking about it made Bella tear up again, and Alice reached for the remote control and turned on the TV. She put on some comedy show. Alice must have thought that it would help Bella keep her mind off the situation, but with the way she let Bella rest her head on her shoulder, Alice must have also known that it was a failed attempt. Bella couldn't focus on anything other than Edward, and how just yesterday she had told him she was ready to have sex with him, thinking that he was a virgin as well. Bella could forgive many things, but she wasn't sure she could forgive this.

Alice stayed until her mom texted and told her it was time for dinner. She asked Bella if she wanted to join her family, but Bella shook her head. Charlie would be home later, most likely with take-out in his hand. They usually cooked dinner together, but on days when he had to stay late at his office in Port Angeles, he liked to pick up Chinese.

The look on Alice's face told Bella that she didn't want to leave, that she would stay if Bella wanted her to. Of course she wanted her friend to stay – she just needed someone with her, but she had been alone for so long. Waiting a couple more hours for Charlie would be nothing. Nothing compared to the emptiness and isolation Bella felt when she lived under Phil's roof. However, this somehow hurt more, a more soulful pain that burned within Bella and enveloped her entirely.

Bella promised to call Alice in an hour, or at least tell her when Charlie came home. She offered to come over again after dinner, in which Bella then said that she would be okay. Alice understood and gave Bella a reassuring, goodbye hug. Bella stayed on the couch as Alice made her departure. She was trying to focus on what was on TV, when she heard Alice slam the front door.

"The _nerve_ of that guy!" Alice muttered angrily as she walked back in. "He better be glad that all I did was just slam the door in his face."

"What guy?" Bella asked, in which Alice replied by giving her a look that clearly said 'who else?' "Oh," she mumbled. "I forgot that he was supposed to come over later, what, with everything going on …"

"Do you want him gone, B? Say the word and I'll make him disappear."

"Of course I want him gone, Alice," Bella said. She sighed and got up from the couch. "But I have to face him eventually – better late than never, right?"

Alice grumbled something but Bella didn't understand. She could feel Alice close behind her as she made her way to the front door. Bella's heart was pounding, her hands were shaking. She tried to focus on putting one foot in front of the other to calm herself down, but it did little. Standing in front of the door, she knew Edward was just on the other side. His presence was so eminent to Bella, except this time it didn't make her feel content. This time, her awareness of him made her feel worse.

A nudge from Alice told her that she was stalling, and that staring at the door in fear wasn't going to do anything. Bella counted to one, two, three, and then opened the door. Standing there was Edward, his face filled with confusion. He must have noticed that Bella was crying because then he looked concerned. When he reached out to her, Bella flinched.

"Bella?" Edward asked, his brows knit together. "What's wrong?"

Before Bella could even open her mouth, Alice pushed her aside and pointed an accusing finger at Edward. "Are you serious? You _asshole, _do you think that after today Bella is going to ever talk to you again?"

Edward gazed at Bella. "What is she talking about?"

"Don't talk to her!"

"Bella?"

"Fuck you, Cullen," Alice seethed. "I can't believe I thought you were good enough for her."

Edward now looked worried. "_Bella_?"

Bella put a hand on Alice's shoulder. "You should go, Al. I can handle it."

"But – "

"I'll call you, okay?" Bella reassured Alice. "But I need to do this."

Alice glared at Edward for a long time before nodding her head. "Okay, B, but call me if you need me. Or just come right over." With that, Alice left, and Bella felt very alone with Edward. She leaned against the door frame and closed her eyes, trying to slow down her heartbeat by taking deep breaths.

_Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out, breathe _–

"Can I come in?"

Bella's eyes shot open and she shook her head. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Why not?" Edward asked.

For a moment, Bella almost laughed. After what Alice just told her, she couldn't believe that Edward was acting so innocently. But then again, he didn't know that Alice had overheard his and Rosalie's conversation – for all he knew, Bella was still in the dark. She felt the corner of her eyes burn with tears. She blinked them away, willing them to stay away just until Edward was gone.

"Alice heard you talking to Rosalie earlier – right before your rehearsal," Bella said as confidently as she could. She crossed her arms over her chest and gulped. "She heard everything."

"What are you –" Edward stopped mid-sentence. He squeezed his eyes shut and ran a hand through his already messy hair. "Oh, God," He groaned. Opening his eyes again, he said, "Bella, I can explain."

Now Bella was staring at the ground – she couldn't stand to look at Edward's face. "You slept with her, Edward."

"I was drunk – I don't even remember most of that night."

"That doesn't change the fact that you _lied_. You lied to my face, Edward!" She cried. She pushed off the doorframe and took a step toward him. Anger coursed through her now. "You drunkenly slept with Rosalie, lied about it, and yet, she still loves you."

"But I love _you_!" Edward said desperately, gesturing toward Bella. "You know that I love you."

Bella bit the inside of her cheek, tears now falling freely down her face – she couldn't stop them now. "I don't know what I know anymore." She sobbed, holding her hand against her chest, as if that would make things better. "I mean, God, Edward, you were the one who saved me that night in the woods. You made me feel like I was worth so much more than anyone, or myself, believed. You told me that you would keep me safe and that you would never hurt me – that you would _protect_ me," She shook her head at him. "And now look – it turns out that the one person that I trusted, that I _loved_, hurt me. I'm _such _a fool."

"No, you're not a fool …"

"You said you were a virgin, and I believed you. We were about to have sex, Edward, and you were willing to go through with it knowing that you lied to me," Bella was shaking. "When did you sleep with her? With Rosalie?"

"It happened in sophomore year, Bella, when you and I still hated each other," Edward said, defeated, and desperately. He raised his hand to gesture at nothing, but Bella guessed it was supposed to represent Rosalie. "It meant nothing to me, _nothing. _I didn't mean for that to happen, I swear. Every day I wish I could take it back, because I never wanted my first time to be with Rose. I wanted it to be with someone special. I convinced myself that I was still a virgin because I found you. You, Bella, you're the one," He ran another hand through his hair. "Rose was a mistake – that entire night was a mistake."

"Is that supposed to make this pain, this ache in my chest, go away?" Edward's eyes were beginning to swim with tears and Bella couldn't force herself to watch him cry. Another tear raced down her cheek and she wiped it away. "You know what the ironic thing is? If you told me the truth, I would have been okay with it. I mean, yeah, I would have been upset, but I would have gotten over it – we didn't like each other at the time. But now …" Bella sucked in her breath, trying not to let a sob escape. "Were you even going to tell me? Or were you just hoping I would never find out?"

In response, Edward hung his head. In that action alone, Bella knew his answer.

"Then get off my porch," She said.

Edward's head shot up. He took a step toward her, but she backed away. Bella couldn't fathom being touched by him now. At her reaction, Edward ran another hand through his hair. "Bella, _please_, you have to understand that I didn't do this to hurt you …"

"You just did it to save your own ass?"

"No! No, Bella, not at all. I just –"

"You need to leave – I need to think things through."

"But," Edward said so quietly that Bella could hardly hear him. "What about us?"

Bella couldn't even look at Edward – she was blinking away tears and looking down at her locked hands. "Just go away, Edward," She whispered back. "_Please._"

It seemed that Edward was frozen, because for what seemed like minutes, he stood completely still. She still wouldn't look at him, but when she saw that he began to walk away, hesitantly, she allowed herself to watch his feet. A light drizzle began to fall from the sky, and Bella still did not move from the door. She heard the rumble of his motorcycle and tried to forget how free she felt whenever he took her on it. She tried to forget all of the good things about Edward, knowing that what she did was the right thing for her. It didn't feel right, but it was. Bella needed time to herself.

Edward's motorcycle took him farther away from the house, from the porch, from her. Once she could no longer hear the ripping sound of the engine, Bella stepped backwards and shut the door. She leaned her forehead against its cool structure and let herself cry the rest of the tears she didn't let escape earlier. Now they were free, and they kept on falling. And just like the rain, Bella's tears fell harder and more plenty.

**xxxxx**

It had been approximately three hours and two minutes since Edward had left – since Bella told him to go away. Charlie had come home not too long ago, and by then Bella had cried away everything she had. She told Charlie that she wasn't feeling well and was just going to be in her room for the rest of the night. Bella had to reassure Charlie that it wasn't anything serious, and that by morning she would be okay. It was a lie, of course. Bella knew she wouldn't be fine the next day – she would feel much, much worse.

Bella was numb now. She was sitting on her bed with her legs crossed. She didn't even bother turning on the light or opening the blinds to let some of the moon's glow in – Bella was completely submerged in the darkness, just like her heart. She kept on wondering if telling Edward to leave was what she should have done, or if she should have let him stay so they could work through it. But when she thought about that path, and having to talk about how he lied, it only made it more painful. It was better this way – to be alone and away from his secrets.

Having figured out that Edward was, in fact, no longer a virgin, and that his first time was with Rosalie, made her wonder what else he was lying about. As many secrets she could come up with, the one that hurt the most was the possibility that the Edward she had grown to love was also a lie. That just like his popular, king of the school façade, his caring and gentle self was bogus. And yet, no matter how realistic that might have been, Bella felt it in her gut that the Edward she had brought out was the truth. At least out of all this crap there was something honest out of it.

She bit on her lip and twirled her hair around her finger nervously, wondering if Edward even loved her at all. Surely he couldn't have – not when he knew how lies and secrets had destroyed her life. Bella didn't have any more room in her to accept them and Edward knew that. So why did he lie to her? Why did he keep Rosalie a secret? No matter how hard she tried to see it from Edward's view, she just couldn't understand. It was too painful to attempt.

An ache began to form in her chest – the numbness was fading away. Bella couldn't cry anymore, but she wished she could. She wanted to relieve the darkness she was feeling. Angrily, she got off the bed and began to pace the room. Her hands were in her hair as she tried to get the numbness back– Bella didn't want to feel anymore. All feelings ever did was end in despair. She had proof of that from both sides now– from sadness to pure bliss, they all ended the same way. She also realized that people were disappointing, that no matter how good or how much you loved them, they would fail. And they would do it epically.

The ache spread from her chest and settled within her entire body. Bella couldn't stand it – just when she thought she had everything figured out, shit happened. Bella knew that Alice was calling and texting her consistently, but Bella could not answer. It wasn't that she was angry with Alice about finding out; it was the fact that she had to find out _through_ Alice. She loved her best friend dearly, but she couldn't stand to talk to anyone. Especially Alice, to hear the sympathy in her voice would be a punch in the gut.

Bella wanted to scream. Scream and scream until her voice was gone. Voices coming from the TV downstairs echoed into her room, reminding her that she couldn't act recklessly with Charlie in the house. He would want to know what was wrong. Bella was so grateful for all that Charlie had done for her – moving to Forks and have her live with him, build a relationship she had been craving all her life, caring for her even though they were just getting to know each other. She was beginning to understand the love a real father would have for his daughter – that he would do anything for her. And while she would do anything to give back to Charlie, even if that meant telling him her heart was shattered, she couldn't do it quite yet. Charlie loved Edward, and for some strange reason, Bella didn't want to ruin that.

"God, Bella," She muttered to herself. "You're so, _so_ stupid."

She leaned her back against the wall and slid down so that she sat with her knees drawn to her chest. Emptiness began to settle in – the ache was subsiding. Bella closed her eyes and continued to tell herself how foolish she was for allowing herself to let down each wall she had grown to build. Most of all, Bella chastised herself for letting the walls crumble because of Edward.

_Edward, Edward, Edward, Edward …_

"Ugh," Bella groaned, putting her face in her hands.

"Bells?" Charlie said through the closed door. He knocked twice. "Bells, are you still awake?"

Bella wiped her face of tears quickly and stood up. She took off the hair tie that was on her wrist and pulled her long tresses into a high ponytail. Straightening her shirt, she opened the blinds and let some moonlight in. She almost tripped on her way to the door, but saved herself by grabbing hold of the wall. With a slow breath, Bella opened the door and put on her best I'm-completely-fine face for Charlie. She expected to see him concerned, just checking in to see if she was feeling better, however, that was not what she opened the door to. Bella didn't understand why he looked so nervous, so scared.

"Charlie?" she asked, growing anxious."Are you okay?" He didn't seem to hear her, so she opened the door a little wider. "I'm fine, Charlie, I took a nap and feel a lot better."

"Bells …"

"It was probably just a time of the month thing," Bella shrugged, continuing to lie. "By tomorrow I should be back to normal."

"Bells …"

"You don't have to worry, you know. Besides, don't you have a deadline coming up? You're probably already so stressed – "

"_Bella_," Charlie snapped, causing her to shut up. He only ever called her Bells. He sighed and rubbed his forehead, when he looked at her, it was gentle. "Something happened."

Her brows knit together. "Is it bad?"

With a shaky hand, Charlie lifted the phone. "Esme called. Edward's in the hospital. She's been trying to call you for hours but you weren't picking up. Bells, I don't know – "

Bella didn't let him finish. She spun on her heel and ran to her nightstand. Picking up her phone, she saw that she had two missed calls from Alice, and fifteen from Esme. It wasn't Alice who was incessantly calling, and now Bella couldn't think. She could only act. With haste, Bella pulled on her sneakers and a hoodie. She grabbed her car keys and ran out the door, past Charlie. Bella ran down the hallway and down the stairs to the front door. She could hear Charlie yelling for her, running after her, but she couldn't stop.

Once she got in her car, she turned on the engine and sped away. The rain continued to fall heavily, and Bella felt guilty. Oh, so guilty. It was her fault. If she hadn't told Edward to go away, he wouldn't have left on his motorcycle. He wouldn't have been caught on this rain. Now he was in the hospital and she didn't know if he was okay.

_My fault,_ Bella thought, _This is all my fault_.

She was still angry at Edward for lying to her, for almost taking something from her while she believed something else, but all she could think of was what condition he was in. A new ache burned in her. This one was different – it was filled with panic and blame, and it hurt a lot more than heartbreak.

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**Twitter: KarinaCullen**

**Tumblr: addictedbooker and/or i-nfiniteinspiration**

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**Hey everyone! I hope you are all doing well. PLEASE DON'T KILL ME**

**I just want to say thank you for response on the last chapter - I did not expect that! You all had so many theories about who overheard Edward and Rose, and while most of you said Bella, a lot of you also thought it was Alice. So kudos to you if you thought it was Alice! I also liked the idea of it being Emmett, and when I read that in some of your reviews I slapped myself in the forehead because that would have been such a good diea, however, it wouldn't have fit in with the rest of the story. Nevertheless, your response was amazing and I can't thank you enough.**

**Anyways, I hope you liked this chapter. I will repeat myself - PLEASE DON'T KILL ME.**

**Here are the books that I've read since the last chapter:**

**The _Percy Jackson and the Olympians_ series (_The Lightning Theif, The Sea of Monsters, The Titan's Curse, The Battle of the Labyrinth_, and _The Last Olympian_) by Rick Riordan. I was re-reading these books because I wanted to get started on the Heroes of Olympus series. The last time I read the Percy Jackson books was back in 2010, and as I was re-reading these books I realized how much I forgot. It was pretty much like reading them for the first time, expect I remembered how it ended haha.**

**I'll see you guys at the next update. And PLEASE REVIEW :)**

**Much love,**

**Karina**.


	36. Chapter Thirty Six: Change

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. But I do own an apple (I'm too lazy to think of anything awesome, and the apple is sitting on my desk all lovely and stuff).

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Chapter Thirty-Six: Change

**_Bella_**

Time seemed to freeze as Bella stood incredulously in front of Carlisle and Esme. She had sped her way to the hospital thinking that Edward had been in some motorcycle accident when, in fact, he had made it home safely after he left her house. Knowing that relieved Bella, but then Carlisle told her what really happened, what had landed him in the hospital at all. The realization of the truth made her feel weak.

"Diabetes," Bella said, still stunned. "Edward has …diabetes?"

"Since he was five," Esme whispered. She was holding onto Carlisle's arm like her life depended on it.

"Why didn't he tell me?"

"He didn't tell anyone – he didn't want to."

"But," Bella shook her head, trying to understand. "It's nothing to be ashamed of. Lots of people have diabetes, it doesn't make him different."

"You're going to have to talk to Edward about that," Carlisle said.

Bella couldn't believe that Edward was diabetic, and she definitely couldn't believe that he had kept it between himself and his family for all these years. She tried to imagine what it must have been like to come home and just collapse. Carlisle said that it was due to extremely low levels of blood sugar in his system, resulting from him not having eaten for some time, as well as stress. Edward had been pale and was sweating before he fell into his mother's worried arms.

"It's reversible, the coma," Carlisle explained. "His unconsciousness was caused by hypoglycemia, so they're raising the blood sugar level by injecting glucagon."

Bella remembered learning about glucagon in Biology class, but was too anxious to recall exactly what it did. She nodded nervously. "So when do you think he'll wake up?"

Carlisle sighed. "That depends on Edward. His body is working very hard to recover itself. He might wake up tomorrow; he might wake up in a couple of days. Either way, the most important thing is that he _will _wake up. So if you want, Bella, you can go home and rest, and Esme will call you once Edward starts to regain consciousness –"

"No,"Bella stood her ground. "I'll wait here with you. It's my fault that Edward forgot to eat and that his blood sugar got so low."

"It's not your fault, Bella," Esme said, bringing her hand to rest on Bella's arm gently." Don't even think that."

She couldn't look Esme or Carlisle in the eye without feeling shame. The ground seemed to be less intimidating and she found herself staring down at it. "What room is he in?"

"Bella–"

"Please. I-I just need to see him."

For a moment, no one said anything; all three of them stood in concerned, anxious silence. Bella shifted on her feet, deciding if she should just go find Edward herself or if she should be respectful of what his parents wanted.

"I'll go with you, Bella. Carlisle is still on his shift," Esme finally said, wrapping her arm around Bella."Come on, sweetheart."

As they walked, Bella couldn't help but feel as though she was the one who should be supporting Esme, not the other way around. She should have been strong, and yet, she couldn't find it in her to be anything other than guilty. She tried to shake the feeling off, and she was almost successful, until Esme led her into the room at the end of the hall. Bella could not have, in any way, prepared herself for what she saw.

Edward laid on a bed in a hospital gown. There were tubes in his nostrils and mouth, and needles injected into his arms. He was still, only the sight of his chest moving up and down were any indication that he was, in fact, alive. Bella didn't see the strong, confident, Edward she knew. Instead she saw a boy. A boy who thought he was invincible, but was proved that even he could be vulnerable. Even he needed someone to lean on.

Bella walked up to his bedside slowly, never taking her eyes away from Edward's emotionless face. She took hold of his hand, and that's when she started to cry. She didn't think she could cry anymore after all the tears that poured out of her earlier, but she was proved wrong.

Sobs broke out of Bella and she collapsed onto the chair that was situated right beside the bed. She never took her hand out of his. Bella knew that Edward was going to be okay, Carlisle said he would. It wasn't like Edward would stay in his coma for months, or years, he would be waking up within the next couple of days. That fact, however, did nothing to appease her, because while she was relieved that Edward was going to have a full recovery, it was the "_what If"_ that bothered her. What if he _hadn't_ made it home? What if Edward had collapsed while he was still on his motorcycle? The possibility of never seeing Edward wrecked her. If the last image she had of Edward alive was him getting on to that bike after she told him to leave, she would never forgive herself.

She rested her head on their linked hands and thanked God for bringing him home safely, because even though he had diabetes and his blood sugar was so low that he went into a diabetic coma, at least it was in the comfort of his home. Bella looked back at the door, and saw that Esme had left. It was just her and Edward – the way it always should be. Bella was stupid for letting him go today.

"I'm so sorry, Edward," Bella cried.

The heart monitor and Edward's breathing were the only sounds in the room. At least, they were the only sounds that Bella cared about to pay attention to. But then a lot of shouting and cursing distracted her. The disturbance only seemed to get closer and closer. Concerned that it would affect Edward, Bella got out of the chair to close the door. Her hand was on the doorknob when Rosalie stood in front of her, with two nurses and Esme telling her to calm down.

"I will _not_ calm down! Get the hell off of –" Rosalie stopped thrashing, her eyes locked on Bella. Her face first registered shock, then sadness, and then downright anger. "_You,_" she snarled. "What did you do?"

"Rosalie," Esme said, trying to calm her down. She was not successful.

"Everything was perfectly fine before you came into his life, _Duck_," Rose seethed, glaring at Bella. The nurses tried to pull her away again, but she got out of their grasp and walked right up to Bella so that they were face to face. "This is all _your_ fault."

Bella already knew that she was to blame for Edward being here – she didn't need Rosalie to remind her about it. She stared at the blonde bitch, not bothering to respond. She knew that if she opened her mouth that she would say something that would be well-deserved, but would also start a full out brawl. There was no doubt in Bella's mind that if Rosalie wanted to start a physical fight, then she wouldn't hesitate.

So instead Bella said nothing, and in turn Rosalie said nothing. She was beginning to calm down, but the anger was still in her eyes. This time when Esme and the nurses asked her to leave, she complied. The nurses took both her arms and lead her out, her eyes on Edward until she was out the door. Bella continued to stand there.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I didn't realize that Edward and Rosalie had a falling-out. If I did I wouldn't have called her," Esme said.

"It's okay," Bella shrugged. "At this point I'm used to Rosalie blaming me for everything that has gone wrong in her life."

"I know something must have happened between you and Edward before he came home," Esme said. "I could tell on his face that he was very distraught."

"Yeah, we um, got in a fight."

_I broke up with him,_ Bella wanted to say, _but now I regret it._

"It will all work out. I know you two, and I have no doubt that you'll find the light at the end of the tunnel." Bella was about to respond, but Esme continued and changed the subject. "Your dad is here, he came around five minutes ago. Did you want him to take you home? Maybe get some sleep?"

Bella shook her head. "I already told you, Esme. I can't leave, not with Edward here. You can tell Charlie that he can leave whenever he wants, and that I'll call him tomorrow."

Esme nodded, giving Bella a kiss on the cheek before glancing at Edward and leaving. Bella sat down in the chair again and took hold of Edward's hand. She knew it must have been late, and she could feel how exhausted she was from the day's events, but Bella fought her fatigue. At least, she fought it as long as she could until she rested her head on the bed and closed her tired eyes.

**xxxxx**

Someone squeezed Bella's hand.

She groaned and tried to go back to sleep, and then she remembered whose hand she was holding. Her eyes shot open and she lifted her head. Edward started to blink, his tired eyes looking around him and his brow creasing in confusion. It was light in the room, a pale yellow glow filling the space. She didn't know what time it was, but figured it must have been early in the morning.

"Edward?" Bella said gently, she got up from the chair and leaned over him, still gripping his hand.

His response was a fit of coughs.

Bella didn't think, she just ran. She ran out the door and down the hallway. "I need a nurse!" She yelled. A woman, maybe in her fifties, started to run toward her. "He's waking up. He-he's coughing …"

"That's normal, dear," The nurse said. "Why don't you go find his mother and I'll check on Edward and call Dr. Cullen."

Bella was about to protest when the look on the Nurse's face told her that she really didn't have a choice. Edward was still coughing, and while she wanted to stay until he was okay, she nodded and left the room. Esme would want to know that Edward had woken up. However, Bella didn't have to look very far, because in the waiting room were Esme and Charlie. She was shocked to see that Charlie was still here, and from the look of his rumpled clothes from yesterday, it seemed that he had stayed here all night. It looked like he didn't get any bit of sleep either. Esme, on the other hand, had found comfort in a fetal position on the couch.

Charlie touched Esme's arm and she began to stir. When she saw Bella, she got upright. She looked at her with questioning eyes, and Bella nodded her head. That was all Esme needed before she began to sprint towards the room Edward was in. Bella and Charlie followed her, but opted for walking instead. When they got in the room, Edward was sitting up and the nurse was tending to him. He was sipping on a cup of water through a straw and looking at his mom in fear.

"_Edward Anthony Cullen_," Esme seethed. "If you ever, _ever_, do that to me again, so help me God … I will sell your balls on eBay."

Bella had never heard Esme talk like that before – she was both amused and frightened.

"What happened?" Edward croaked.

"What _happened_?" Esme asked incredulously. "What happened, Edward, was that you apparently forgot to eat, and therefore your blood sugar got so low that you fell into a diabetic coma," Bella thought Esme was going to yell again, but instead she began to cry. She wrapped her arms around Edward and broke down. "I was so scared, sweetheart. Please don't ever do that again."

"Come on, Bells," Charlie murmured, wrapping his arms around her shoulders. "Let's give them some space, hmm?"

Again, Bella didn't want to leave, not when Edward was awake, but she nodded her head and followed Charlie out the door. She knew that Edward's parents would want to see him first, and that she would get her turn eventually.

They passed Carlisle on their way out, who gave them a relieved smile before making his way to Edward. Bella's stomach grumbled and Charlie laughed – the look he gave her told her that he was hungry too. They walked silently on their trip to the cafeteria. Bella noticed how calm the hospital seemed to be, how the squeak of her shoes along the linoleum floors echoed down the hallway. And when they actually did make it to the cafeteria, Bella observed that there were around six people inside the vast room.

The hospital was serving eggs, bacon, and fruit. The eggs didn't look real and the bacon not crisp, but Bella ate it anyway. She was _starving_, and maybe that's why the food didn't taste so bad. She and Charlie were sitting at a table by the window, and as Bella continued to chew, she could see the dark circles under Charlie's eyes. The morning light emphasized them.

"You stayed," Bella said, setting her fork down and observing Charlie. "You didn't have to, you know. I told Esme to let you know that it would have been fine if you went home and slept."

"I couldn't leave knowing that you were going to stay here until Edward woke up," Charlie shrugged and looked out the window. "I spent sixteen years without you, Bells. I'll take any chance I can get just to have you around me."

Hearing that made Bella bite her lip. She hated when Charlie said things like that – it reminded her of all the years of happiness that were stolen from her.

"Well, thanks, Charlie," She smiled. "I don't tell you this enough, but I'm really happy, and grateful, that you moved to Forks just to be with me."

"About that, Bells, you do know that I can't stay in Forks forever, right? Eventually, I'll have to go back to California. That's where my head office is. I know I promised that I'll stay here until the end of your junior year, and I will. But what about after that, would you be willing to come back with me for your last year of high school?"

If someone asked her this six months ago, Bella would have ran to her room and started packing. But now, she wasn't so sure. She still couldn't really stand most of her peers, but she had a life here now. She had one worth living. There was Alice. There was Edward. How could she leave the two people that changed her life for the better? But then again, to get the opportunity to finish high school in California would be amazing. Bella was planning to leave Forks for college anyway, what was one year earlier going to do?

It could mean a lot.

"If you would rather graduate in Forks, that would be fine," Charlie said. "I could talk to the Carlisle and Esme – I know for a fact that they would let you stay with them for the year. Just no funny business between you and Edward, okay? And I could probably come back to Forks once a month and stay for a week."

Charlie was negotiating with her – he just wanted her to be happy. He would sacrifice seeing her everyday if she wanted to stay in Forks. It was so selfless it warmed her all over.

Bella found herself nodding –she didn't even register it until she saw Charlie smiling. It wasn't her brain telling her what to do, it was her heart; her instincts. "I'd love to stay with you in California, Charlie. That sounds, well, it sounds amazing."

It looked like he wanted to hug her, but then he frowned. "I also want you to start going to therapy. You went through a lot, Bells. You may say you're fine, but ten years from now I don't want it to bother you. I want you to move on with your life knowing that you are safe and that any kind of loneliness and pain you felt before can be put behind you."

His idea surprised her. Never in her life did Bella consider going to therapy, to tell some person with a PhD about her problems and get feedback about it. Bella wasn't sure if she wanted to do that, or even if she needed to. She was in a pretty good place in her life, and yeah, it wasn't perfect, but she thought she was doing pretty damn well for someone who went through as much crap as she did. Bella was going to say just that when Charlie shook his head, as if he knew what she was going to say.

"We'll talk about it some more later. We should go check in on Edward," He told her. "But, Bells, I'm happy that you'll come back to California with me. I know you'll be leaving a lot behind here, but I promise that I'll do my best to make you happy. That's all I've ever really wanted from you since the day you were born, even when I hadn't seen or heard from you for all those years."

Once again, they were put in a silent spell. They threw their empty plastic plates in the trash and left the cafeteria. Bella had just agreed to move to California after her junior year. It was the end of February, which meant she had four months left at Forks High. But did that mean that they would leave right after, or would they spend the summer in Forks and then leave. Bella wondered how long she would have before she had to say goodbye. She never thought she would ever feel a bit of sadness about leaving this town, but she did. It was the right thing to do – the parent who actually cared for her, Charlie, lived in California. His company was there. His life was there, and he wanted Bella in it.

But … therapy? Yeah, Bella had been through shit. Yeah, maybe she should have sought counsel sooner, but now she was okay. And that's all she ever really wanted to be.

When they were nearing Edward's room, she saw that Charlie went to go sit in the waiting area instead. Bella was going to follow him, but he shook his head and nudged her towards the room. Charlie knew that Bella would want to talk to Edward alone, whether it was about what they discussed or just because she wanted to, or both, she was glad that he understood. She gave him a grateful smile and a small wave before continuing down the hall. When she approached the door she saw that Carlisle and Esme were still there, relieved expressions on their faces as they talked to Edward, who was still a little pale. He had a tray of food sitting on his lap and was eating it slowly.

Bella was about to turn around and let the family have a little more time together when Edward said, "Bella," He sounded nervous, if not a little shocked that she was there. He gave a shy smile that made her heart squeeze. "Hey."

She could see that Edward wasn't sure where they stood, and to be honest she didn't know either. But what she did know was that she made a mistake, and that she wanted to fix it. However, she wasn't sure if she could with her leaving after junior year.

"We'll let you guys talk," Carlisle said, putting his hand on the small of Esme's back as he started to lead her toward the door. He looked at Edward. "Just holler if you need anything."

Edward nodded, watching as his parents passed Bella. When he brought his gaze back to her, she almost broke down crying again. She was so grateful that he was okay, but he looked terrible. He was so pale and he had circles under his eyes. Bella took slow steps toward him, though it made her nervous that Edward was watching her with such focus. It made her self-conscious. She knew for a fact that she looked like shit, but she tried not to let that get to her.

Bella sat down in the chair that she had slept in, except this time she didn't grab Edward's hand. She wasn't sure if she was allowed to do that anymore.

"My mom said that you stayed the night in that chair," Edward said, breaking the silence. "I didn't believe her."

"Why?"

Edward shrugged. "After yesterday, well, I thought that you hated me," He sighed and shook his head. "I really fucked up."

"You did," Bella agreed. "You really, _really_ fucked up."

"I know I shouldn't have lied to you, Bella, but that was a part of my life that I regret so much. I remember bits and pieces of it, but I know for a fact that I felt nothing. I don't give a shit what Rose says, that was a _mistake_," Edward hung his head. "I didn't know that she felt that way about me, I swear."

"Rosalie came here last night, kicking and screaming. She yelled at me and everything."

"I don't know why she did. I told her that I didn't want to talk to her anymore, you know. I cut ties with her. Does the same apply to us? Have you cut ties with me?"

"I'm still hurt that you lied about having sex with Rosalie," Edward flinched at that. "But after last night, after seeing you in this bed unconscious, God, Edward. I can't imagine being without you. I just kept on thinking what my life would be like if you weren't in it, and it was too unbearable. I shouldn't have reacted the way I did yesterday, it was childish. We are so much better than that, and I don't want to lose you."

Edward smiled, but then frowned again. "I should have told you about my diabetes. I'm so sorry you had to find out this way."

"Why didn't you tell me, or anyone? Diabetes is nothing to be ashamed of, Edward. A lot of people have it and live long lives."

"I just didn't want people to treat me like I was fragile," Edward said. "When I first got diagnosed, my parents acted as if I could die at any minute – I don't want people to see me like that. I'm a normal person, I just have one tiny glitch."

"You're not weak, Edward," Bella told him. This time she did take his hand. "You're the strongest person I know."

"You're stronger," He said gently.

Bella shook her head. "I'm really not."

"Yeah, you are," Edward argued. "Any other person who went through what you did with Phil and Renee would not have survived. They would not have tried to make the best of things like you have. You are strong, Bella. You make _me _stronger."

Bella wanted to cry, but she digressed. She had cried so much already. She always saw Edward as the strong one, but to hear that he believed otherwise was astounding. Bella never really gave it much thought, or maybe she just didn't want to admit that she had come a long way. But she did know that she didn't do it alone.

Which made what she was going to say that much harder.

"Charlie asked me to come live with him California after school lets out this year," Bella murmured. "And I said I would."

She was watching Edward's face, and to her surprise he seemed calm. "That sounds like a great idea."

"But, what about us?"

"Look, I'm not saying that I'm not going to miss you – I obviously will. But you're forgetting that my grandma lives there and I'm sure she would have no problem seeing me whenever I come to visit. It's going to be hard, but if there's anyone who could work through a long distance relationship after a suicide attempt and a diabetic coma, it's us. I have so much faith in us that it's almost ridiculous."

At this Bella laughed out loud. She squeezed Edward's hand and he brought his other hand over their clasped ones. "I'm serious, Bella. Don't worry about what this will do to us. I'll come visit you as much as I can, and I'm sure Alice will ensure that you come back to Forks as much as you can manage. We can call, text, and Skype. We'll be fine."

"Charlie also wants me to start going to therapy," Bella added.

Edward seemed to ponder this, nodding his head slightly as he creased his brows. "You should do it, Bella. And don't glare at me," Bella rolled her eyes, trying not to narrow them. "All I'm saying is that it wouldn't hurt to tell someone else besides your friends and family about the shit you went through. And you don't even need to limit it to that, you can talk about what stresses you and stuff. If you find that it isn't for you, fuck it. At least you tried."

When put in perspective like that, Bella considered that maybe therapy would help in some way or another. It was nothing to be ashamed of, either.

"When did you get so wise?"

"I've always been wise – you just thought I was an asshole."

"That's because you _are_ an asshole," Bella teased. Edward smirked at her, obviously feeling better.

"This shit again? I thought we got passed this," Edward replied.

"Oh we did, but it doesn't change the fact that you're an asshole."

"And you're still a bitch."

"But you wouldn't love me if I wasn't."

Edward winked. "Ah, you know me so well."

They both had a lot of stuff to work through, but Bella knew that as long as she had Edward by her side, anything was possible. He saved her when she thought she was beyond saving, and she helped him realize it was okay to just be yourself. Bella never thought it was possible to find happiness in the life that she was given. Edward taught her that she was worth living, and through all that, they found love. They found stability within each other.

All those secrets and lies that were stuffed into a glass bottle until it was filled to the brim, had controlled their lives for so long. But now, Bella could see that they had smashed that bottle. The glass shards, though sharp, would no longer hurt them. The contents inside were exposed and could no longer affect them.

They were free.

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Twitter: kaarinaaxo

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**HEY YOU GUYS.**

**So ... yes. This is the last chapter. But, what? An epilogue? Yes, there will be an epilogue. I should have that up either next week or the week after. I'm going to be very OCD about the epilogue - it needs to be perfect!**

**I read a lot of books since the last update, and am kind of lazy to list them, so if you want to know just PM me. However, I will talk about how I did, in fact read _The Heroes of Olympus _seres (_The Lost Hero, The Son of Neptune, and The Mark of_ Athena). Yeah ... WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT ON EARTH HAPPENED AT THE END OF THE MARK OF ATHENA. PLEASE TELL ME THAT DID NOT ACTUALLY HAPPEN. PERCABETH WHY.**

**I need to vent ... so message me if you want to listen.**

**Anyways, I just want to say in advance how thankful I am for all of you. This story has come such a long way, and I couldn't have asked for a better group of readers. I love you all so much. It's sad to see that this story will be ending next update, but like all good things, it must come to and end.**

**I'll see you all next update. PLEASE REVIEW.**

**Much love,**

**Karina.**


	37. Epilogue: Content

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own a parking pass for school (which by the way is REALLY EXPENSIVE and it makes me want to cry).

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Epilogue: Content

_**Bella**_

**Sixteen months later**

God, it was hot in this gown.

The California sun wasn't sympathetic today. Bella, along with the other seven hundred students who were graduating from Santa Monica High School, were sat in the amphitheater. They were all dressed in their blue and gold gowns and matching blue caps. It was graduation day, and all Bella could think was that she made it. She finally finished high school – it was time for the real world.

She was also thinking about how hot it was in that stupid gown, but she tried to not let it faze her.

The thing about having a last name that started with an 'S' meant that she had to sit there without falling asleep as they called each name by alphabetical order. When Charlie had moved back to Santa Monica, with Bella in tow, last August, he had asked her if she wanted to change her last name to Garland. Bella wasn't going to lie – she had thought about it. For years she had wanted nothing more than to get rid of the name Swan, but now, she was okay with it. She had agreed to go to therapy, and Dr. Shelly helped her see that what she had been through shaped her into who she was today. So she decided to keep her last name, because while that name brought some unwanted memories, it also reminded her of how far she had come from rock bottom.

They were on the letter 'R' now – Bella sighed in relief. She knew the minute everyone got their diplomas that they would throw their caps in the air, but she feared of what her hair looked like underneath. Surely it looked like a sweaty, frizzy mess. Glancing to her right, she saw Jessica Stanley. She had met Jess in English on the first day of senior year. They had grown to become very close friends. Alice often joked that Bella had replaced her as a best friend, to which she assured Alice that she was still number one. She last saw Alice during Christmas break – it was a tearful reunion, but it was what she needed. Bella surprisingly had felt homesick, and seeing her best friend cheered her up. They also Skyped every other day, in which Alice reported all of the stupid stuff that occurred at Forks High. Like how Angela was still an attention whore. Still, she still missed her best friend.

When they finally got to 'S,' Jess turned around and mouthed, "Finally,"

Bella nodded in exasperation –she could see that a lot of people were getting a little uncomfortable in the heat as well, but the air of excitement was still lingered.

The school year had been difficult, especially since there were so many more students as compared to Forks High. The school was a lot bigger, as well. Bella had gotten lost multiple times before Jess finally took pity on her and showed her the best ways to get around campus.

"On my first day, I missed half my classes because I got lost," Jess had told her. "Oh, and welcome!"

Jess was a lot like Alice in a way – both were bubbly and stylish. However, Jess never cursed while Alice said, "fuck," "bitch," shit," in every sentence (though not necessarily in that order). Like Alice, Jess understood that Bella liked to keep to herself sometimes and was totally cool about it. Bella appreciated it, but after two weeks she told Jess her story. She was done hiding the truth, and people either accepted her for it, or didn't. Jess was one of those people who accepted it and acted like Bella was no different. Actually, a lot of her classmates acted the same. They were nothing like her previous classmates – who judged someone just for wearing a ponytail. The students at Santa Monica High School seemed to not judge people at all.

Okay, Bella knew that wasn't true – but whatever.

Bella had made a ton of friends in Santa Monica, and was surprised that so many people actually liked her. And she knew it was genuine –no one was using her to get somewhere in the social latter. Slowly Bella had relieved most of her stress and enjoyed high school for the first time. The only thing she wanted was for Edward to experience it with her.

She and Edward were still together – he tried fly out as much as he could, and vice versa, but even then they only saw each other once a month. They called each other every night and texted nonstop, but still, she missed him. Edward had gotten the lead roles in all the school productions during his senior year and had also made valedictorian. He didn't talk to Rosalie anymore, saying that she went to a boarding school in Idaho. She apparently cut off everyone except Emmett.

She missed seeing Edward on her doorstep, ready to pick her up from school. She craved his touch. Bella even missed it when they argued. Having a long distance relationship was hard, but it only proved how much they loved each other. Edward was still her rock, and she wished he were here right now. Actually, he would have been, had Forks not had their graduation day on the same day. Bella was disappointed that Edward and Alice couldn't be here, while they were disappointed that she couldn't be in Forks.

Bella sighed. Her name was coming up next.

She was scanning the crowd. The only one to come and see her graduate was Charlie, and honestly, she was okay with that. Lots of fathers were looking down on their children with pride, while a plethora of mothers seemed to tear up at the thought of the child they had raised for the past eighteen years finally growing up. Bella's mother was nowhere to be seen – and thank God for that. Charlie still kept in contact with Detective Newton back in Forks, just in case Phil and Renee decided to move back, but they hadn't heard a word. Charlie also hired a detective in California to keep on searching for them. Both Detectives had the feeling that Phil and Renee had fled not just the States, but North America all together. They had contacts in Canada and Mexico, and no one seemed to have any leads. At this point Bella didn't care for justice – she was just happy to have them out of her life.

The only good deed that Renee had done for Bella was leave the note about Charlie in the shoebox with her savings. That was the last piece of contact she had from her mother, and it seemed to be the last.

Bella finally found Charlie sitting in the middle of the third row. He gave her a small wave and she beamed back. Her name was coming up soon and she couldn't wait to get that damn diploma in her hand and peace the fuck out of there. Bella laughed at her own thoughts – she used to swear so much, and then somewhere along the way just stopped. But somehow she picked up the habit again, reminding her about Edward. Just like Alice, he cursed all the time.

There were two empty seats beside Charlie, which he was obviously reserving, as he put his blazer on one seat and a scarf in the other. She had no idea why he even brought a scarf – it was ninety degrees out! She raised her brow at the two seats and saw Charlie laughing.

Um, what the hell?

Now Bella was confused – who else would come to see her graduate? A scary thought that it could be Phil and Renee clouded her mind for a second before she remembered how much Charlie wanted to send them to jail. It wasn't until she saw the petite frame and a mop of bronze hair did Bella grasp what was happening.

"Isabella Swan," Principal Bryant announced.

Bella reacted a millisecond too late, but no one seemed to notice how stunned she was when she stood up from her seat and made her way to the stage. She was suddenly very conscious – all eyes were on her. People politely clapped, and her friends cheered her on, but all she could pay attention to were the three most important people in her life who just happened to be sitting in the stands.

"Yeah, Bella!" Jess yelled.

"You did it, Swan!" Seth Clearwater cheered.

And while all of the other friends she made in California cheered her on, she could faintly hear someone yell, "Go, B! Work those heels!"

Bella was wearing a pair black snake-skinned, pointed toe pumps by Michael Kors. They were a Christmas gift from Alice. She smirked, and kept her head held high as she crossed near the podium, where the Principal was smiling at her, diploma in hand. She shot one more glance at the stands and caught the gaze of the person she couldn't believe was here, but so desperately wanted to see. Edward stood there, his eyes filled with pride as he clapped and cheered her on. Really, all she was doing was graduating from high school – it wasn't like she achieved world peace. She didn't really deserve all the praise she was receiving.

But it still felt really, really good.

"Congratulations Miss Swan," Principal Bryant said, shaking her one hand and delivering her diploma in the other. "Welcome to the real world. Are you ready?"

Still shaking his hand, Bella grinned. "I think I am, actually."

That seemed to be the right answer, because Principal Bryant gave her a thumbs-up. She took that as her cue to exit the stage, and weaved her way through rows of graduates to get back to her seat. There were still a huge list of names to be called, but Bella could only focus on a pair of green eyes that seemed to burn into her soul. Edward grinned crookedly, as if he knew what him being here did to her. She couldn't wait to get alone with him … to ask him what the hell he was doing here.

Okay, and maybe some other things, too, but it wasn't like it was a bad thing to want her boyfriend all to herself. She and Edward had finally made love last Christmas. It was painful and clumsy at first, but it only got better from there. It was special for both of them. But now, well, Bella really missed him.

"Graduates!" Principal Bryant said into the microphone. His hands were grasped on both sides of the podium as he scanned the sea of blue and gold gowns. "Move your tassels from the right side and place it to the left."

Every graduate did so, and Bella could feel her heart flutter in expectation as she watched her newly moved tassel sway gently.

"These diplomas that our seniors grasp in their hands resemble the many years of hard work and achievement throughout their academic career thus far. It symbolizes how they achieved their successes and the young men and women they have grown up to be. I am proud to say that Santa Monica High School had a fantastic group of seniors who not only succeeded individually, but together," Principal Bryant said. He stood tall with his eyes trained on the crowd, and every so often he would glance towards the graduates with a smile. "You see, I have seen most of these faces since their freshman year, others along the way. In each student I see how they grew from individuals, to a team. It only proves that in life, while it is good to be independent and headstrong, it is also okay to seek help from others. Because in all honesty, you'll find that you can't do everything on your own for many, many things. It gives me great pleasure to know that you lot have grasped that at such a young age," He shrugged then and laugh. "I guess there really isn't any more to say but that we will miss you when you embark on your life endeavors, but wish you luck. So, Santa Monica High School's graduating class – congratulations! And good luck."

All at once there was a roar of applause and cheering as the graduates stood from their seats and threw their caps in the air. Bella watched as hers seemed to float. And as she caught it, it was almost like her new life was just handed to her; that the way she lived it was in her hands now. She laughed as she kept the cap in one hand and her diploma in the other. She saw Jess running towards her before she enveloped her in a hug.

"Oh my God, Bella – we actually did it! We actually just graduated!" She said.

Bella giggled. "It's about fucking time, don't you think?"

"Hell, yeah!" Seth yelled. He wrapped his arms around the two of them. "Group hug!"

"Seth, you jerk, get off of us!" Jess said.

Seth was a good foot taller than Bella, and was Jess' best friend. They had known each other since freshman year. When Jess took Bella under her wing, it was only natural that Seth do the same. Though Bella was closer to Jess, she was pretty fond of Seth as well. Throughout their senior year it had been just the three of them, and while they hung out with other people too, it reminded Bella of how it was in Forks with her, Alice, and Edward.

Soon, other people joined their hug. Riley Biers had roughed up Seth's hair, Bree Tanner punched Jared Cameron in the arm for stepping on her foot, and Embry Call just wanted to feel the love. After a while they all started jumping and Bella laughed as their movement made her jump as well. These were the people she had sat with at lunch every day. She had grown close to them throughout the year and they all knew about her past and what school had been like before – they didn't care. They just liked being around her.

When she was finally able to move way from the center of the hug, Bella ran smack first into someone's chest. That person chuckled, and Bella knew exactly who it was.

"Well, aren't you Little Miss Popular," Edward smirked. "I never thought I would see the day."

"What are you doing here?" Bella asked, ignoring his teasing remark. "I thought your graduation was today, too."

He shrugged. "I lied."

"I thought we agreed to be honest with each other."

"We did – I just happened to do it this one time to surprise you," Edward then frowned. "Aren't you happy to see me?"

Bella rolled her eyes and brought her lips to his. It was chaste, and Bella definitely wanted more, but somewhere in this crowd her dad was looking for her. She didn't want him to get a good look at how intimate she and Edward were. "I'm over the moon and you know it."

Just as Edward was about to respond, Bella was yanked from his embrace and pulled into another.

"I'm so proud of you, B!" Alice said, hugging her. Bella had almost forgotten how small Alice was, and she noticed how she had grown her hair so that it brushed the tops of her shoulders.

Pulling away Bella said, "I can't believe you guys lied to me! When are actually going to graduate?"

"In two days!" Alice replied with a devious smile. "This means you get to come to Forks and watch us walk the stage."

Bella was about to say she wasn't sure she would be able to go, as she would have to speak to Charlie first. However, as she was thinking that, Charlie showed up with the same expression as Alice. At that point Bella knew that this was all part of the plan. She didn't know whether to hug or punch them all.

"Jasper is coming to drop off some of the papers I have to sign before it's due at six tonight," Charlie said, acting like Alice and Edward being here was the best graduation gift ever. "I hope that's alright."

"Of course," Bella said.

Charlie smiled and brought Bella into a hug, kissing the top of her head. "I can't believe you're all grown up. My little girl – a high school graduate!"

"I'm going to be a college student in September."

Charlie shook his head. "I don't even want to think about it."

Bella laughed as Charlie excused himself, receiving a text from Jasper that he was here.

"Jasper?" Alice said, curiosity in her voice.

"Oh, that's Charlie's assistant. He does it part-time since he's still in high school, but I'm pretty sure he's graduating this year, too."

"I wonder …" Alice's eyes got wide. Bella turned to see what Alice was staring at – it was Charlie with Jasper by his side. She didn't really know him, just that he was a nice guy. She met him for the first time over a year ago with Edward; however, she was growing concerned about Alice's reaction. Bella touched her arm, about to ask what was going on when Alice muttered, "Holy shit."

And then Alice slapped her in the arm, hard.

"Ow! What the _hell,_ Alice?" Bella was rubbing her arm and glared at Edward when she heard him laugh. "Oh, shut up, Edward."

That made Edward laugh some more.

"Remember when I told you that I slept with my best friend's boyfriend because I was in love with him?" Bella nodded her head. Alice then pointed at Jasper. "That's him."

"Who …" Bella turned and saw that Alice was pointing at Jasper, the guy who just so happened to be Charlie's part time assistant. Jasper, the guy who was staring back at Alice like he couldn't quite believe what he was seeing. "Holy _shit_."

"Well, fuck," Edward laughed incredulously, rubbing his chin. He nudged Alice with his arm. "So are you going to talk to him, or what?'

"How about … no," She said, turning around and trying to make a break for it, though she failed since both Bella and Edward caught her.

"Al, you have to talk to him!"

"I don't _have_ to do anything."

"Oh my God, just at least wave or something."

"B, I am not going to – " Alice cut off when she saw Jasper standing right beside her. "Hey, Jasper! Long time, no see," she said awkwardly, giving Bella a look that begged her not to be left alone, but Bella walked away slowly anyway. After all this time, Bella had gotten her shit resolved; it was time that Alice did the same.

She felt someone grab her hand, and she didn't need to look to see who it was. Edward's low chuckle brought a smile to her lips as he pulled her away from the awkward confrontation between Alice and Jasper. Bella then remembered how hot she was in her graduation gown and she unzipped it, revealing a chiffon dress with capped sleeves and slit back that came to mid thigh. She had kept her graduation cap on in fear of what her hair looked like after hours of the heat, but a lot of other people did the same so she didn't feel left out.

Edward leaned in and kissed her cheek, almost knocking off her cap. Bella laughed as she put her hand on the flat surface of the cap to keep it from falling. It was moments like this when Bella wished that she had spent her senior year with Edward, but she knew that moving to California had been the best plan. After everything, Bella needed a fresh start. And really, it only proved how strong she had become. Not once did Bella feel an ounce of weakness during her time in California. She was happier, freer.

"Let's take a picture," Edward said, pulling out his phone and holding it in front of him. She smiled into the camera, but laughed when Edward kissed her cheek again. Bella hadn't realized that he had taken the picture until Edward showed it to her. He leaned in and whispered in her ear, "You're beautiful, you know that?"

"You make me feel beautiful," Bella mumbled into his chest as she wrapped her arms around him. "I still can't believe you're here."

"I'm always here," He said, putting his hand right above her heart. "Right where it matters most." He held her tight again. "I'm so proud of you, Bella. You did it. You really did it."

"Thanks to you."

"Nah, I only helped a little. You were the one in control the entire time."

Bella rolled her eyes. "How about we agree to disagree?"

"Whatever you want," Edward said, then he laughed. "I still think you were checking me out that day you broke my phone, by the way."

Bella pushed him away and threw her head back in laughter. "Get your ego in check, Cullen. I don't kiss assholes."

"Then I guess it's a good thing I'm no asshole."

Just as she was about retort, Edward cut her off by bringing his lips to hers. She smiled into their kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck as he rested his hands on her lower back. It was a funny thing, high school. Everyone assumes they know each other's shit, when in reality, you don't really know someone until you try to get to know them. A popular boy may just be the smartest kid in school and the freaky girl may just happen to not be so freaky after all. Bella and Edward figured that out together – they made each other wiser, stronger.

They weren't Douche Master and the Duck anymore – they were just Edward and Bella – two eighteen year-old high school graduates who went through everything together. They hated each other before they loved each other. Life wouldn't get any easier from this point on, but at least they would have each other.

In the last year and a half, Bella gained a parent she never knew she could have, a best friend she never thought she would make, and a boyfriend she never thought would love her as much as he did. Bella had gotten rid of the bad energy in her life, and was completely content. With Edward's arms wrapped around her, she was able to reach into his pocket and grab his phone. She unlocked the screen and pulled the picture he had taken not too long ago. Bella couldn't help but tear up at how incredibly happy she looked, because it was true.

Bella was perfectly, completely, and finally, happy.

THE END

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**So ... This is it.**

**I would like to thank all of you for your continued support. This story would honestly be nothing if you guys didn't continue to read and give me feedback. It's been a long three years, but I feel like it was worth it. I grew up a lot while writing Bottled Lies, and so did my characters. There were many times when it would be months between updates, but you guys only proved to be the best readers out there, telling me to take my time and deal with my personal life first. For that I thank you. I love you. I adore you.**

**I feel like I have grown as a writer these past three years, and I will cherish this experience for the rest of my life. Cheesy, but totally true. I posted the first chapter in November of 2010, when I was 15. I was in my junior year of high school, jobless, without a driver's license and basically just trying to figure out who I was as a person. Now, here we are - August 2013. I am 18, going into my second year of university, a licensed driver, and have more or less figured out who I am as a person. You all have been there with me on this journey. You have given me advice when I needed it. Also! You let me rant to you about my book feels, which is amazing! I congratulate you on having to read my manic rants on certain books that have ruined my life (which means they're my favorite). So thank you to those who let me vent about all of Cassandra Clare and Rick Riordan's books.**

**Many of you have asked if there will be a sequel, and the answer is no. I'm sorry to say that Bottled Lies will not have a sequel, but this is where my Bella and Edward's story ends. This is where it was meant to end all along, in fact, it has been planned since the first chapter was posted back in late 2010. But thank you for loving this story enough to want it to continue. That means the world to me!**

**So, yeah. This is the last author's note for Bottled Lies. Once again, THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH. I love you and adore you and I really appreciate everything you have done for this story. It's time to click that 'complete' button.**

**Much Love,**

**Karina.**


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